Chapter 29 Section 3

When she was a student, Mizuki often complained: "I always feel that I am not a real Tokyo native. I really wish that the household registration said so-and-so district, I almost could live in Nerima district." Among the golfers, there are only a small number of people who have lived in Tokyo since their parents' area, and Mitsuki is one of them, so she is envied by everyone.Even so, she seemed resentful that she wasn't living inside. "My family used to live near Asakusa. But the house there was rented. My father wanted to live in Tutiancuo very much, so he borrowed a lot of money and built a house in the place where he lives now. He seems to be interested in that I have a special liking for this house, but I think it would be better to sell it as soon as possible. After all, if you miss this good opportunity, there will be no next time. If you miss this good opportunity, you will definitely not have the chance to sell it.”

The good opportunity that Mizuki refers to refers to the enthusiasm of the Japanese people because of the high land price.The time point is the peak period of the bubble economy. The house where his father missed the best selling point was in Hoya; a two-story wooden building with a narrow gate.It is only a few minutes walk from Hoya Station on the Western-style Ikebukuro Line, very close to the shopping street, and there is a health club within a few steps of home.According to Meiyue, the market price was nearly 100 million yuan at its peak. Zhe Lang had called her family beforehand and told her that she was going to visit the house today.As soon as he said that he wanted to ask about Mei Yue, her father responded without further inquiry, "Then I'll wait for you at home." His voice sounded like he had made some kind of psychological preparation.The calm way of speaking made the figure of Yukio Hirokawa appear in Zhe Lang's mind.

Zhe Lang waited until the appointed time and rang the intercom, but there was no response from the speaker, but the door in front of him suddenly opened.A short and thin old man with all his white hair combed back saw Zhe Lang and bowed his head slightly to greet Zhe Lang. "Mr. Nishiwaki?" "I am." Zhe Lang replied, bowing his head in return. "I've been waiting for you for a long time, please come in." The old man opened the door.His squinted eyes were exactly the same as Mizuki's. The old house smelled like bonito.As soon as Zhe Lang entered the room, he was immediately taken to the Japanese room.It is said to be a Japanese room, but a tea table and chairs are placed, and it is used as a general room.There is a small courtyard outside the floor-to-ceiling windows, which may be the pride of the owner.There are several potted plants in the garden.

The house is heated with a stove.Zhe Lang thought, Mei Yue's father might have been waiting for him for a long time. Mizuki's father was about sixty years old.I heard that he used to be a school teacher and is currently a contract employee of a company that produces teaching materials and textbooks. "I heard my daughter mention Mr. Nishiwaki. She often said that because of you, the Teito University American Football Club can enter the college league." Her father said with a smile. "Did you say it the other way around? She probably said that because I was the quarterback, I couldn't win the college championship."

"No, no, that's okay." Her father waved. "Mizuki is a child who speaks mercilessly. On the days of competitions, she will always belittle the players who make mistakes. However, I don't remember her saying anything bad about you." "That's it." Zhe Lang thought to himself, even if she said something bad about me, you wouldn't be able to say it in front of me.He took a sip of tea and continued: "Actually, I came today to ask about Mei Yue." Zhe Lang spoke bluntly, but her father's attitude did not waver in the slightest.He nodded and said, "You seem to have gone to Matsudo too, didn't you?"

"Have you heard?" "A few days ago, my son-in-law called and said that he had talked with you a lot." "I know I'm nosy, but I just can't ignore the fact that my old friend has been missing since a year ago." "How can this be meddling. I appreciate you worrying about my daughter, Mizuki has really made good friends." He nodded frequently as if agreeing with himself. "Mr. Guangchuan doesn't seem to call the police to find someone, and he doesn't want to actively look for Mizuki. What about you? Have you looked for it through various channels?"

"Well," Mizuki's father slowly pulled the teacup in front of him. "Well, basically I tried to contact the person I thought of, but I heard that she left a note and a divorce application, so..." "You don't really want to go?" "I think Mizuki is an adult. Since people in their thirties will abandon their families and run away from home, they must have thought carefully and made a considerable degree of determination. So I think, if this is the case, I will wait until she comes up with some kind of answer. I'm sure she will contact us sooner or later."

Zhe Lang thought to himself, this is indeed something a retired teacher would say.Although he can understand these words and they sound reasonable, they don't sound like the true words of his biological father.As a parent, it is impossible not to worry about children who have heard nothing from them. One of the purposes of Zhe Lang's coming here is to obtain clues about Meiyue's whereabouts.But to be honest, he was already mentally prepared that the trip would probably be in vain.Besides, there was one thing he had to confirm. "Mr. Ripu, I'll just say it straight." Zhe Lang put his legs together and straightened his waist. "Do you know the reason why Meiyue ran away from home? No, it should be said that you have expected this day to come sooner or later? So, even if things really happened, you can still be so calm, right? "

There was a look of panic in his father's eyes. "What do you mean by that?" "I can't believe that Meiyue's parents think that she can obtain the happiness of ordinary women through marriage. You are completely unaware of her essence." Mei Yue's father put the tea cup in his hand on the tea table, and Zhe Lang saw his hand shaking slightly. "You said Mizuki's essence is...?" Zhe Lang stared into his eyes and shook his head, and said, "Stop pretending. I'm not ignorant, I've already said it so plainly. Don't you think that if you continue to deceive yourself like this, you are torturing her?"

Hearing what he said, Mei Yue's father turned his eyes away and looked at the courtyard for a long time before facing Zhe Lang again.A painful smile appeared on his face. "What did Mizuki tell you?" "Before... a long time ago, she once confessed to me." In fact, it was recently, but Zhe Lang couldn't tell here. "That's right. But my daughter said that no matter how close she is, she never showed her true face." "She can't be called 'daughter'?" As soon as Zhe Lang said, his father's eyes became sharper. "Please don't talk like that! You won't understand how we feel in our hearts." His tone also became stiff.

"I think I understand a little bit the pain in her heart." Zhe Lang retorted. Christmas carols were heard from somewhere, and it seemed that a vendor's cart with a loudspeaker passed by.Zhe Lang thought to himself, where should Meiyue welcome this year's Christmas. Mizuki's father reached for the teacup again, but he only glanced into it before putting the cup back in place. "Mr. Nishiwaki, do you have any children?" "No, no." "That's it." "Do you want to say that because I don't have children, I don't understand your feelings?" "No, I didn't mean that." He showed his yellow teeth. "I don't think you can understand that feeling whether you have children or not. But if you have children, it's somewhat easier to imagine." "Do you mean parental affection for the child?" "No, it's the self-satisfaction of the parents." He said firmly. "Do you admit to being self-satisfied?" "Although it's uncomfortable to say that, I can't find any other suitable words." Then, he turned his eyes to the courtyard again. "There's a wall there, isn't there?" "Yes." Zhe Lang also looked at the courtyard and nodded. "Meiyue often climbs up there to play. Her mother always scolds her angrily: she is not like a girl, but I am always a peacemaker. I also once said that girls in this world should be so lively. This kind of It’s a really casual statement.” "I heard from her that her mother was very strict." "Probably because of anxiety. She realized that Mizuki was not an ordinary girl before I did. At that time, all I could think about was the school children, and I didn't have time to pay attention to my own daughter." He smiled self-deprecatingly. "Excuse me, what time is Mr. Hiura..." "You want to ask me when I noticed it? I don't know, I can't say a correct time point. I think the first time my wife discussed this matter with me was when Mizuki was just in elementary school. " "What did she discuss with you?" "Isn't Mizuki a bit weird?—I don't remember if she said that, but what she meant was that. Mizuki doesn't like things that girls usually like, doesn't play games that girls can play, I don’t want to wear a skirt. Well, that’s about it.” "Then what do you say?" "As I said just now, I said it's okay to have such a daughter, and I didn't take it seriously. Among the students in my school, there are all kinds of children with different characteristics, so I even feel that because of that kind of Sesame made a big fuss over a trivial matter, which was really wrong. Later, my wife discussed the same problem with me several times, but I didn't listen to her seriously. To be honest, for me at that time, home was just a simple place to use. A place to sleep. I was young and ambitious. In addition to teaching students in the school, I also participated in various seminars and book clubs. Taking care of the family will not be blamed." The Japanese were overworked at the time.A man who is said to be a workaholic will not only not reflect, but will be proud of it. "But when I think about it now, I feel very shameful. I don't even know what happened in my own family, what kind of educator." After he exhaled, he glanced at the teacup. "Would you like some beer? I'm thirsty." Zhe Lang originally wanted to say no, but after thinking about it, maybe he would start talking when the wine got into his throat, so he replied: "Then drink a little." After Mei Yue's father left the room, Zhe Lang stood up and looked towards the courtyard.The wall that Mizuki used to climb and play became black and black. He looked around the room subconsciously, and his eyes stopped on the small bookcase against the wall.He found that besides the book, there was also a photo frame, so he walked over and picked it up. It looks like a photo of Mitsuki's coming-of-age ceremony.She was photographed with three women who appeared to be friends.Zhe Lang could tell from their outfits that they were taken at the coming-of-age ceremony. Mizuki was wearing a long-sleeved kimono, her hair was pulled up, and she was smiling for the camera.Her expression didn't look like the smile of someone who was forced to wear a kimono, but she smiled brightly from the bottom of her heart.She is more beautiful and more feminine than her other friends.Zhe Lang recalled the night when he held her in his arms.He felt the same emotion in the picture that he felt in her then. There were footsteps in my ears.Zhe Lang put the photo frame back in place and sat back on the chair. Mizuki's father poured beer into their respective glasses and put persimmon seeds on small plates.Zhe Lang said: "I want to drink." He took a sip of beer.The beer wasn't cold enough. "When Miyue was at home, there was always beer in the refrigerator. But I don't drink much recently." Her father seemed to notice that the beer was not cold, so he explained. "She's a good drinker, isn't she?" "Yes." Zhe Lang echoed, remembering that the two of them got drunk a while ago. His father drank about half the beer from the glass and sighed. "I think I realized the seriousness of the matter when I was in the sixth grade of Meiyue Elementary School." He suddenly returned to the original topic. "Actually, she was already willing to wear skirts and play with girls, so I didn't worry about her at all. However, she stopped going to school from a certain day." "A certain day?" "Menstruation, she is facing menarche." "what……" "This incident itself is not unexpected. We men do not understand, but to women, it is a very shocking thing. However, after listening to the mother or sister's explanation, most women can immediately Get back on your feet." "But she couldn't pull herself together." "No. She doesn't see anyone, and she doesn't eat well. When I felt anxious for no reason, my wife said: That child is really not an ordinary girl. Although she will behave like a girl in front of her parents, she doesn't have the characteristics of a girl." Inwardly, that’s why I feel distressed when my menstrual period comes.” Zhe Lang remembered what Mei Yue told himself.She said: "Once a child is sensible, he will worry about many things. If the mother sheds tears because of herself, the child will think that this cannot continue." She added: "So I started acting. Then maybe my mother thinks I'm on the mend." Zhe Lang murmured in his heart, it doesn't seem to be the case, your mother has already found out. "If it is now, maybe there will be different ways of coping." Mizuki's father said, "After all, gender identity disorder has become a common term. At that time, the world didn't even know that there was such a disease, and they just thought that appearance was a A woman does not have a woman's heart, which is a spiritual defect." "So what did you do in response?" "We didn't do anything. It's not okay not to go to school anyway, so we severely reprimanded her and forced her to go to school. Later, we monitored her every move." "Surveillance?" "Monitor her living conditions. I ordered my wife to monitor her to see if she behaved like a woman, and if she didn't behave like that, I would persuade her well. I put the blame on my wife in my heart. I thought that the reason why my daughter It became that kind of virtue because my mother didn't teach it well." Mei Yue's father smiled wryly, drank the beer in one gulp, and then poured the wine into the empty glass. "Do you know a man named?" "John Manny? Don't know." "He believes that people's self-perception of gender will be changed by the influence of acquired environment. Even if he is born as a boy, if he is raised as a girl, he will be convinced that he is a woman. This argument seems to have been published in the society The example cited at the time was that a twin baby boy born in the American countryside accidentally burned off the genitals of his elder brother or younger brother during circumcision. At that time, the baby was about seven months old. His parents went to sex expert John Mann Discuss. The Manny teacher proposed to raise the child as a girl and also had the child's testicles removed and had regular hormone injections. The child's parents did as he said and raised the child as a girl. John Manny It was this case that was published at the academy.” Although he is a retired teacher, it is impossible to have this kind of knowledge.He must have been worried about his daughter's affairs, so he did some research by himself. "Since it was published, it means that the experiment was successful? In short, the child was successfully raised as a girl." When Zhe Lang asked, Mei Yue's father started shaking his head. "It was said to be a success in the publication, but it was not the case. The children who had the surgery were always suffering from difficulty in identifying their gender, and when they grew up, they had another surgery and turned back into a man." "In other words, there's no way to forcibly change a person's gender identity, can they?" "What my wife and I did to Meiyue was the same as that sexologist. We refused to face up to the essence of that child." "That's no wonder, I thought. Because she's a woman in the flesh and doesn't do the same things as that man named John Manny." "In terms of wanting to control gender awareness, it's the same. I, I often feel scared now. I'm afraid that I will do the same thing to the many children I have taught so far as I did to Mizuki back then. Alas, even saying such things now won’t help.” He grabbed a persimmon seed from the small plate and put it in his mouth. Zhe Lang drank warm beer. "When Mizuki was with us, she was completely a woman." "Yeah, that kid's been acting. We've been vaguely aware of it, but we're playing deaf. We were thinking, whether she's acting or not, she's doing us a huge favor by living like a woman." Gradually, we really selfishly hope that the day may come when the fake show is real. Although we know in our hearts that day will not come." "You know she's acting, but you still let her get married?" "Should we be blamed for this?" "No, I'm not condemning you..." Zhe Lang lowered his head. "When someone came to propose a blind date, we hesitated. We hoped to let her enter the family like ordinary girls, but would that make Miyue happy? On the other hand, we would also think that it is because she is different from ordinary people. , so wouldn't it be better to let her marry?" "and then?" "In the end, we let Meiyue judge for herself. The child said that he wanted to meet the other party. I still remember the anxious expression on my wife's face on the day of the blind date." "What about her?" "Mizuki," her father raised his head a little at this point, showing a look of looking into the distance. "Then what should I say? If I try to give an example, her expression is like a doll. It doesn't look like a real person's expression at all. Maybe she wants to completely become a doll." "And Mr. Guangchuan fell in love with that doll." "Because that man is also a freak." He poured wine into Zhe Lang's glass. "Meiyue said that if the other party likes her, she can get married. My wife reminded her several times that marriage is not a child's play, and I was very worried. But in the end, we still sent her out of the cabinet. In short, we think that if she can let go of the past It's also a good thing." Zhe Lang heard from Mei Yue herself what kind of mood she had in getting married.But after hearing what her father said, their respective troubles surfaced from different angles. "I think I may have made a big mistake on the day of the wedding ceremony. Mizuki, who was wearing a white bridal gown, didn't look happy at all. She had such a hopeless expression on her face. Maybe I should have rushed out and knelt on the ground to pay my respects." Everyone apologized and canceled the wedding ceremony. My wife also said the same thing afterwards." "So this time you also..." "Yes." He nodded deeply. "Just like you think, I'm mentally prepared that this day will come sooner or later." "That's why you don't go to her." "I hope that child can stop thinking about whether he is a man or a woman, and live according to his own thoughts." Then, he narrowed his eyes and continued, "Because I made a mistake once." After finishing a bottle of beer, Zhe Lang got up to say goodbye. "I'll accompany you to the door." Mei Yue's father also came out of the hall.He was wearing a jacket and a scarf with a yellow pattern on a gray background wrapped around his neck. When Zhelan praised the scarf, he looked shy. "Mizuki woven this for me more than ten years ago. I used it carefully, but it's still quite worn out." "She can also knit?" "She probably forced herself to practice. But ah." After speaking, he smelled the scarf. "When Miyue gave me this scarf, she put it on for me herself. Her expression at that time, no matter how you look at it, was a woman's expression. That should not be acting. So, I may make you laugh when I say that , I still prefer to believe that the child is a woman." Zhe Lang nodded silently.He wanted to say: Me too. In his mind, the photo of the coming-of-age ceremony suddenly appeared. -------------------------------- Note: