Chapter 19 Section 6

Zhe Lang was queuing at the taxi waiting area, remembering what Hayata said before: "The reason why I like American football is that it is a sport of completely fair competition." Hayata cites radio as an example. The use of radios in American football games is now commonplace.The quarterback's helmet is equipped with a radio, and even on the field, he can rely on the direction of the team leader and coach.In addition, the coach can also sit in the upper auditorium of the competition venue, observe the enemy's movements, analyze the data with the computer at hand, and communicate the tactics to the team leader and players.American football is a sport that uses high-tech machines and is increasingly highly developed.

Hayata was referring to the way in the NFL (National Football League) when a team's radio fails and becomes unusable. "At that point, the team immediately told the referee about it. How did the referee respond? Amazingly, the referee ruled that the other team couldn't use the radio either. In other words, if one can't use it, neither can. Fair play. The Japanese don't have that sensibility." Not helping Zhelang and the others, nor investigating the people and things around them, can be said to be Hayata's thinking mode. It was almost twelve o'clock when Zhe Lang got home.As soon as he opened the door, a hoarse voice burst out from the house.

"This is not an excuse. I don't like it, so I don't want it. Risako, you won't understand my feelings." "When did I say that I understand your mood? It's not a matter of mood, but because I have to do it, so I said it. I'm for your own good." "Even if it's for my own good, I don't want to be ordered by you." "This is not an order, it's a request. I beg you, wear this." Compared with Mizuki's emotional tone, Risako's tone was calm, like a mother trying to persuade her daughter.No, maybe it should be said that it is the son.

Zhe Lang opened the living room door.Mizuki stood with her hands on her hips, and Risako sat on the sofa with her arms crossed and her legs crossed.Neither of them turned their heads to Zhelang. "What's the matter with you?" Zhe Lang asked, but neither of them answered.Risako stared at Mizuki, and Mizuki squinted upwards, and the two of them remained motionless. Zhe Lang saw some clothes on the loveseat, skirts, suits, jackets, shirts, pants and underwear, all of Risako's clothes.Zhelang noticed what was going on in front of him, Risako seemed to want Mizuki to wear these clothes.

"Risako, don't force her." "Don't talk too much! I'm really thinking about Mizuki." "I'm also seriously thinking about her!" "Since this is the case, you should also know what contingency measures must be taken." "What the hell happened?" Zhe Lang asked, Risako sighed heavily with his shoulders slumped, and reached for the cigarette on the coffee table. "During the day, people from the apartment management company came to our house." "Management company?" "Check the fire alarm, two men came into the house."

Zhe Lang remembered that there was a contact letter in the mailbox informing him to check the fire alarm, but he didn't pay much attention to it. "and then?" "They saw Mizuki. I tried to hide her, but there are fire alarms in every room." "So what? It won't matter if you are seen." Risako exhaled smoke forcefully. "After the inspection, when I was about to get the confirmation stamp, a person asked me: Was that person just now a woman?" Zhe Lang glanced at Mei Yue.She looked at the American football adorning the TV cabinet and bit her lower lip lightly.

"That man probably didn't see Hiura clearly, right? Could it be because Hiura is considered short among men, that's why he said that?" "He can see very clearly, and I noticed that he kept squinting at Mizuki." "...Then, how do you answer?" "I said that Mizuki is a man. After all, she was wearing a man's shirt, and her speech was rough. Would it be strange if I didn't answer that way? But the other party looked surprised. He probably discovered that Mizuki is a woman. " "It doesn't matter. It's just the people who run the company. It won't get to the police."

Hearing what Zhelang said, Risako shook his head vigorously, as if saying: You don’t understand this. "I think the problem is that Mizuki is now a woman even in the eyes of unsuspecting people. We didn't realize it because we met every day, but Mizuki gradually turned back into a daughter." "No way? She's only been here a week." "It should be nearly three weeks since she stopped injecting hormones. Right?" Risako asked Mizuki, but Mizuki remained silent. "I didn't notice a change." "The change is very subtle, but there are still people in the world who can see that subtle difference. Mizuki has already dressed up like this, and even made her hair like a man, but people with discerning eyes can still see it. You should also know that this is What a dangerous thing, isn't it? That family has a woman dressed as a man—what if such rumors spread?"

"In that case, just don't let her go out. Just be careful not to let her see anyone." "If you keep talking about this expedient measure, it means that you don't understand the current situation at all. You can't keep Meiyue here forever and think about some practical things." "Are you thinking?" "Of course I'm thinking about it. I've also told Mizuki about this, and I want her to be my photography assistant temporarily. Although I can't afford a high salary, I've always wanted to find someone to help me. I can trust Mizuki, and I hope she can help me too."

Zhelang heard for the first time that Risako wanted to find an assistant.But speaking of it, the two haven't talked about each other's work recently. "Did Hiura agree?" "If there is something I can help with, of course I'd be happy to do it. Otherwise, I'd be an idler like I am now. But," Mizuki picked up the American football and stroked it with her palm like she was playing with a baby. "If I have to dress like a woman because of that, I don't want to help." "You can't go out dressed like this. What can you do? Besides, you don't dress like a woman, you just go back to your previous clothes."

"I said, I don't like that." "Miyue, I beg you not to be stubborn anymore. If you are sure you can hide from the police, you can just throw away all the women's clothes. This is just temporary patience." Mizuki patted the ball she was holding in her arms, then raised her right hand. "Enough, stop talking." She threw the ball to Zhe Lang.The ball drew a beautiful spiral parabola, hit him hard in the chest, and then fell to the ground. "Hipura..." "Stop talking, let's stop here. It was a mistake for me to stay here." Mizuki shook her head, opened the door and walked out of the living room. "Mizuki!" Risako jumped up from the sofa, intending to chase after Mizuki. "Wait!" Zhe Lang stood in front of her.From the entrance came the sound of Mizuki going out. "What are you doing? Get out of the way!" "You stay here, I'll go after you." "What are you going to do..." "At least it's more useful than you. It's more convenient for men to talk to men." She was startled and her eyes widened. "I'm leaving." Zhe Lang grabbed his sports coat hanging on the back of the dining table and chairs, and turned to chase Mei Yue. Zhe Lang rushed out of the house with his sports coat and ran to the elevator.The elevator door closed right in front of his eyes, Zhe Lang and Mei Yue in the elevator exchanged a glance. He rushed down the stairs next to the elevator without hesitation, the soles of his leather shoes slipped, making him regret not wearing sneakers to go out. Zhe Lang was confident in his physical strength, but he was out of breath when he got down to the second floor.He gritted his teeth and stepped on the last staircase, but suddenly stopped his body, which was about to rush down, because Meiyue was just below the stairs.As if expecting him to come down, she looked up at him with folded arms. "It's time." Mizuki pressed the stopwatch. "With your speed, there's no way to charge the ball. You don't deserve to be a quarterback." "The ace quarterback doesn't need to run himself, that's the point." Zhe Lang pointed to his temple as he walked down the stairs.On the way downstairs, he threw the sports coat in his hand to Mizuki. "Will you be cold in that?" Mizuki took the sports jacket and raised her chin unhappily. "Don't treat me like a woman." "Don't talk nonsense. If the other party is a woman, I will not throw clothes to her. I will gently put them on her from behind. Don't talk nonsense, just put them on. Because even if you have a cold, I can't take you See a doctor." Mizuki seemed to want to say something, but she put on her sports jacket silently.The shoulder line of the coat was too wide, and Mizuki managed to stick her hands out of the cuffs. "QB's suit is so big." "Better than wearing Anzai's big, smelly jacket?" Anzai, a former linebacker, was the sweatiest on the team, and Mizuki had dubbed him the "Living Sprinkler."She probably remembered this past event, and the lines at the corners of her mouth softened. "Do you want to chat?" Zhe Lang said. "En." Mei Yue nodded, then looked at Zhe Lang. "A man-to-man conversation?" "Of course." Zhelan replied. He wanted to find a place to drink and chat, but Mizuki suggested going to the park he had been to last time. "Is it cold? It's already December." "It's not that cold yet, the wind is quite comfortable. Besides, I feel very warm after wearing this coat." Mei Yue folded up the front of the sports coat. The two walked to the park where Mizuki confessed that she had killed someone.The street lights were still on, and the few benches in the park were empty.The two sat side by side on a bench near the entrance. In the middle of the night, there were actually old people taking their dogs for a walk. "I don't know what kind of relationship that old man thinks we have." Mei Yue said. The dog stops under a tree.Holding the dog leash in his hand, the old man looked at Zhe Lang and the others from time to time.The old man seemed to be watching whether the dog was about to defecate, and he was also very curious about the two of them. "I don't know. It's still blowing outside in this season, he should think we are freaks." "It would be nice if he thought so, but probably not." "Then what do you say?" "That old grandpa probably thought so: it's a strange couple to be outside in this season." She added: "It's a pity that he guessed wrong." "Really? It's 30 meters away from that old man, I don't think he can see Hiura's face clearly." "That's why. It's because he can't see my face, so he can judge by the overall feeling. In this way, in the eyes of the old man, we look like a couple with a good relationship and sitting on a bench " After finishing speaking, Meiyue leaned on the bench and opened her legs that were originally close together. The old man still stopped and looked at them.Although he couldn't see his expression, Zhe Lang knew that he was staring at him intently. Mizuki laughed. "Here, he's starting to get confused. For a grandpa at such an age, it's unimaginable for a woman to sit down with her legs spread wide." As a result, the dog started moving just by urinating.The old man was dragged out of the park by the dog, until the moment before he left the park, he was still peeping at Zhe Lang and the others. Meiyue suddenly got up and took a deep breath, then faced Zhe Lang, and said: "This kind of thing shouldn't be said by myself, but if I am alone, everyone will think that I am a man. I have full confidence in this point. However, this depends on Depending on who's next to you, it sometimes shows itself." "What's the meaning?" "For example, like this situation. QB has a strong body, good looks, and manly manners. I am really inferior to a man like you. And I wear your masculine clothes Men's sport jackets with a nice touch. Whoever you look at, we're a couple. I don't think it's weird that I look like a woman, and we probably look like a couple wherever we go." "Is that why you don't want to go to the hotel?" "Yes. It's not just for this reason, but because there are people, there is no way to talk openly and honestly." Mizuki sat down again.She put her head in her hands and ran her hands through her short hair to scratch. "I'm not reconciled. No matter how hard I try, there is no way to become like a QB." "You don't have to be like me, do you?" Zhe Lang laughed, "You should have an ideal male model in your mind." Mei Yue raised her head and stared at Zhe Lang intently.There was a serious light in the depths of her eyes, and Zhe Lang moved his body back slightly. "Didn't I tell you?" Mizuki asked. "what?" "I should have told you." "Tell me what?" Hearing Zhe Lang's question, there was an unreadable smile on her lips.She blinked twice, stared at Zhe Lang again, and said, "In my mind, QB is the most perfect man—I should have told you." After a few seconds, he let out a low "ah".That memory clearly came to mind. That night, he faced the naked Mitsuki in his dirty apartment. "What does it matter?" After saying this, she went on to say, "After all, QB is the most perfect man..." The touch when holding Meiyue and the breath of each other came to Zhe Lang's mind one by one.He tried to shake the sight away, rubbing his face with his hands. "Do you remember what happened that night?" "Yes." Zhelan replied.He didn't know what expression to make. "The QB kept saying nothing about that as if it never happened." "I think that's better. Or, am I doing something wrong?" "No, you did it right." Mizuki crossed her arms and shook her body back and forth. "I feel like I did something stupid. Even if I did that, it wouldn't solve anything." "Is there something you want to settle?" "Yeah, I want to solve a lot of things." After finishing speaking, Mizuki remained silent. There was a long silence.The wind brought the stench of car exhaust, probably because of the proximity to Ome Street.Zhe Lang looked up at the sky, there were no clouds, but he couldn't see the stars.In college, he used to look up to the sky after practice.This is done to sort out the formation in my mind.He will repeatedly imagine the appearance of his golfers taking actions according to the plan, and the successful implementation of the plan in the game is the happiest thing.Now, nothing is going as planned, and plans cannot be drawn up as before. "I want to become a QB." Mizuki muttered. Zhe Lang looked at her profile, and Mei Yue also turned her face to him. "I want your face, that body, and that voice. If I were made that way, I should have a different life." "But it may not be a good life." "It will definitely be a beautiful life." Mei Yue said with firm eyes.She continued: "At least I can get that woman." Zhe Lang opened his mouth, but no sound came out.He was chewing on the meaning of her words. Mizuki squeezed out a smile. "I'm always confessing. The first confession said that I was actually a man; the second confession said that I killed someone. This confession is the third time." She raised three fingers.At the same time, the smile disappeared from her face. "I like Risako. I've always liked her since then, and my feelings haven't changed." Zhe Lang held his breath and looked at Mei Yue's profile.She didn't say a word, letting time pass by. His mouth was thirsty, and his tongue felt the cold air, Zhe Lang was shocked to realize that his mouth had been opened all the time.He swallowed first, then licked his lips. "I was taken aback." Zhe Lang managed to squeeze out such a sentence. Mizuki's cheek muscles relaxed. "It's no wonder." "Are you kidding me?" "Well, I'm serious." "I see." Zhe Lang sighed, subconsciously turning into a deeper sigh. He remembered an episode from the game.At that time, Risako and Mizuki worked together to pass sports drinks and towels to the players.The dazzling Risako also has many admirers outside the club and is a representative of the American football club.Although Meiyue is not eye-catching, she is not only familiar with the rules, but also good at listening, so the players always consult her when they have something to do.The division of labor between the two women's team managers is just right.Everyone said that they were the best partners.In addition to club activities, they are also good sisters. But Mizuki was already a "man" at that time.Even in the eyes of outsiders, the two of them exchanged handkerchiefs, Mizuki might still have a special feeling for Risako.After hearing her confession last time, Zhe Lang has not thought of this until now, which can be said to be stupid. "I don't think you can figure it out. I wanted to confess my love to Risako several times, but it was all in college." "I see." "However, I couldn't muster up the courage, because Risako couldn't accept me at all. Later, I found out that she had a man she liked. Do you remember? When I was just in my senior year, the QB passed out in practice once ,Right?" "Ok……" It happened in April of that year.Because of the rain that day, I switched to weight training at the gym.At first everyone worked out individually with dumbbells and gym equipment.Then someone came out with the ball and started practicing passing and catching.Soon, the practice of passing defense was added.Then a few more people joined the ranks of practice, launched a simple mini-competition.During the process, Zhe Lang was also forced to participate.Because no one can pass the ball properly, it's not fun. The rule is not to block each other, so everyone did not wear armor and helmets.Everyone agrees to hang the towel around their waists, and if the towel is taken away, it will be considered as being blocked.But when everyone is addicted to the game, the usual habits come out.From time to time, physical collisions occurred during official matches. When Zhe Lang wanted to pass the ball, a player rushed over.He did come to grab the towel, but he used too much force and hit Zhe Lang's lower body directly.Zhe Lang couldn't bear the impact, and fell backwards.A group of people huddled around him trying to grab the dropped ball. In fact, Zhe Lang didn't remember anything after that.It was later heard that he was immediately sent to the university's teaching hospital because of a concussion. "At that time, Risako was crying in the waiting room of the hospital." "No way?" "You think so, don't you? Such a strong woman can cry. That was the first and last time I saw her cry." Zhelang recalled that the last time he saw her cry was when Risako found out that he had designed her to be pregnant. "At that moment, I gave up. I knew that this woman's heart could not be towards me. I can only live as a woman." Perhaps remembering the regret and powerlessness at that time, Mei Yue pursed her lips a line. Zhe Lang suddenly woke up. "That's why you came to my place that night..." Mizuki scratched the top of her eyebrows in embarrassment. "I can't say the reason, and I don't know why myself. At that time, I just wanted to be hugged by a man. The reason why I came to you may be because you are the man Risako likes and also the man I admire. Anyway, I was like, if I'm going to get the man part out of me, I'm going to have to sleep with the QB." Zhe Lang remembered Mei Yue's expression at that time, she didn't look like she was pursuing pleasure at all.Even so, she still stubbornly asked him for it.The two spent the night sweating and immersing themselves in sex.Zhelang is 100% a man, while Mizuki tries to be a man.For her, it was a ritual to obliterate a certain part of her heart. Mei Yue got up from the bench and spread her hands towards Zhe Lang. "At the time, it wasn't my first time." "yes?" "My first time was in middle school. The other party was a boy who didn't know how to be interested. I don't remember much about his appearance. So for me, it was a meaningless sexual experience. However, with QB's The time is different. If I really want to say it, it is my first time." She added: "But saying this may cause you trouble." "Then what happened to Nakao?" Mizuki frowned as if she had been hit by a sore spot, put her hands into the pockets of her jeans, and started writing something on the ground with the toe of her sneakers.It is the word RB, which refers to the running back (Running Back). "Gong Fu is a good man. There are a lot of women around him, but he just likes me." Mizuki directly called Nakao by name, which made Zhelang feel calm.Kosuke, Mizuki—the two must have called each other that way.It's like very ordinary couples calling each other by their first names. "Before, Nakao said it. Although he accepts that you are a man now, when you dated back then, you were definitely a woman." "It's heartbreaking to hear." Mizuki erased the word RB with the sole of her sneakers. "But he can say that, I must be grateful. In fact, even if he beats me, I have nothing to say." "Do you like Nakao?" "I like it. I liked it in the past, and I like it now." "Which kind is that..." Zhe Lang didn't know what to say. "Do you want to ask if it is love?" "Oh, yes." "It's a difficult question to answer." Mizuki stared at the ground. "I don't know what it's like to fall in love with a man. However, it's a fact that being with Gongfu is very happy and feels safe." "What about that?" "sex?" "Ok." "Sex is not a big problem. Of course we did, because sleeping with Gongfu doesn't make me feel uncomfortable." How about sleeping with me?This question flashed through his mind, but Zhe Lang pressed it without asking. "I took the initiative to break up with Gongfu." "why?" "I'm just saying, it's for our mutual benefit. You also know Gongfu's personality. If the other party proposes to break up, he will neither ask why, nor will he stalk him in a shameful manner. He just Say, since you say so, there's nothing you can do about it. Then we're done." Zhe Lang thought, really like that guy's style. "Kong Fu is a good person." She said the same thing again. "It would be a disaster if such a good man gets involved with a freak like me." Then, she put her hand on her forehead in a funny way. "But if you say that, I'm sorry for Dad. He is the biggest victim." "Dad mean?" "My son's father." "Ah..." Zhe Lang had already forgotten the existence of this person, because he couldn't associate her with a husband from her attire. "Aren't you worried about them?" "My son and his father?" "Hmm. You haven't contacted them at all, have you?" "Because I ran away from home." Mizuki shrugged. "I try not to think about them. If I thought about them, I would probably go crazy with guilt. If only he would remarry someone else soon." "Your husband..." Zhe Lang closed his mouth again after speaking halfway.He thought to himself, she probably doesn't like this kind of statement. "Has he filed a petition for divorce?" "I don't know. Basically, I signed the divorce papers before I left the house. But I don't know if he handed it over." "I don't quite understand this kind of thing. Leaving aside him, don't you want to see the child?" "My son?" Zhe Lang nodded.Mizuki looked up at the sky and sighed "ah".The breath he exhaled instantly condensed into white mist. "I've never forgotten him, and I've always been thinking about him. But for the sake of that child, I'd better not see him again. Even if the child is with me, he will not be happy." Seeing Miyue's face contorted in pain, Zhe Lang thought of what happened when she gave birth.What kind of state of mind is it to conceive with a man's heart and then give birth?Of course, this is something Zhe Lang can't imagine no matter how hard he thinks about it. "Excuse me." Mizuki smiled, "I just want to tell you my feelings for Risako." "I understand that." "The reason why I went to Shinjuku was also because I wanted to meet Risako. I was already mentally prepared to be arrested by the police, so I wanted to see her. It doesn't matter if I can't talk. No, I didn't plan to talk to her at all. At that time , I’m wearing women’s clothing, right? I don’t want her to see that at all.” Hearing this, Zhe Lang suddenly figured it out.He nodded heavily and said, "Is that why you refused so excitedly just now?" "I don't want to dress up as a woman in front of Risako anymore, I want to get along with her as a man." After speaking, she made a kicking motion towards Zhelang. "Hearing someone say that about his wife, most husbands will be angry." "Perhaps, but I don't feel angry at all." "Because I'm not a real man. Let me tell you what you think, anyway, you don't feel any pain." "Not like that." "It's okay, I understand. It's all about me being self-satisfied and playing a one-man show anyway. It's called eternal unrequited love. But even so, it's still a very important thing for me." Unrequited love forever... Zhe Lang always felt that he could understand that feeling.Knowing that it is meaningless, but you can't help but be attached to it-everyone has such an existence.Mizuki's voice can be said to be the proof of her being a man. "Do you want to go back? Risako is waiting at home." Mizuki put her hand on her forehead, inserted her fingers into her hair, and scratched her head. "Although I don't think I should go back, it's okay if I don't go back." "For me, please, go back. Please. Let's discuss about women's clothing." She smiled wryly at Zhe Lang's words. "QB, you've worked hard. How long are you going to call the shots?" He spread his hands slightly. "Until the end of the fourth quarter."