Chapter 11 Section 5

That was two summers ago. Our school's baseball team made it to the finals in the regional qualifiers.As long as we win this game, we can go to Koshien to compete as we wish. The game went very smoothly at the beginning, and our team entered the second half of the game with a one-point lead.The auditorium of our school was full of jubilation, but our contestants were all very nervous. Probably due to being too nervous, the situation took a turn for the worse, and the pitcher suddenly made mistakes again and again. Our team was tied for three games in a row, and we were about to lose the game.I probably won’t be able to go to Koshien this year...

The game has come to an end, and the time has come for our team to fight to the death. We want our opponents to see our team's perseverance.I was the No. 2 hitter, and after hitting a ball, I was running like hell to third base.The gloved third baseman was chasing after me.The runner at third base desperately gestured for me to sprint.I slammed toward the base, and the second the tip of my left finger touched the base, I was hit on the shoulder by the third baseman.I was sure I hit base first, and I breathed a sigh of relief. However, just a second later, the referee made a decision that shocked me.

"Out." I couldn't believe my ears, I looked up at the referee, and sure enough I saw that he had raised his right hand high. Cheers suddenly came from the opposing team's audience.The audience on our side all sighed and frustrated. I straightened up and took a step towards the referee, wanting to protest him.The referee looked at me with a "what's the matter, are you still not convinced?" expression on his face. "Serizawa!" the third-base runner called, "Back back!" I bit my lip and walked towards the dugout, looking back at the referee several times.Obviously I hit base first, so why should he send me out?This bastard, I must sue him!I can't swallow this breath--

That's how the summer league ended in a disastrous defeat for my team. On the way back to school from the arena, everyone looked at me coldly.Although some people comforted me by telling me not to take this matter to heart, most of the players seemed to regard the loss as my responsibility.After the summer vacation, I still feel a huge invisible pressure in school, as if the whole high school is against me, even my younger brother who is in junior high school is often bullied. "If it wasn't for that guy's recklessness, our school wouldn't have lost!" A football guy said it to my face, and I beat him up in a rage.After this incident, I was forced to leave the baseball team.The classmates stopped interacting with me, and I became more and more bored with going to school, so I started playing truant, always spending time in some messy places, and made a few good friends like this.

Not long after, I dropped out of school and moved out of the house, a process that didn't take much time at all.When I came back to my senses, I was reduced to a gangster who was wandering in the bustling streets at midnight, selling high-purity toluene. I also tried several times to change my mind and start a new life, but society turned a blind eye to my efforts.As long as a person has fallen once, he seems to have lost the right to return to the right way. Whenever I came home from get off work in the billiard room to spend the night in my poor little house, I kept thinking about the last game.I'll never forget what that referee looked like.It was his judgment that brought me to where I am today.

I meant to write him a letter of protest, but I never sent the letter. The hatred in my heart multiplies just by thinking of that name.I know very well that there is nothing I can do now, so I can only hate him, hate him.