Once upon a time there was a handsome gentleman; all his chattels were a bootstrap and a comb.But he has one of the best shirt collars in the world.All we have to hear now is the story of the collar.
The shirt collar is old enough to consider marriage.It so happened that he and the garter were washed together in the water.
"My God!" said the collar of the shirt. "I've never seen anyone so slender and delicate, so charming and gentle. What's your name, please?"
"I can't tell you that!" said Garter.
"Where is your house?" asked the shirt collar.
But garters are very shy.She found it very difficult to answer such a question.
"I suppose you are a girdle?" said the collar of the shirt--"a sort of undergarment girdle! I can see, my dear lady, that you are useful as well as an ornament!"
"You shouldn't talk to me!" said Garter. "I thought, I didn't give you any reason to do that!"
"Well, a man as beautiful as you," said the collar of the shirt, "is reason enough."
"Please don't come too close to me!" said the garter. "You look like a man!"
"I'm still a handsome gentleman!" said the collar of the shirt. "I have a boot remover and a comb!"
This is not the truth at all, because these two things belonged to his master.
He was just bragging.
"Please don't come too near me!" said the Garter, "I am not used to this behavior."
"That's just a pose!" said the collar of the shirt.At this point they are taken out of the water, starched, hung on a chair to dry, and finally taken to an ironing board.Now comes a hot iron.
"Ma'am!" said the collar of the shirt, "my dear widow, I feel rather hot now. I am a different man now; my wrinkles are gone. You have ironed me through, oh, I want propose to you!"
"You old wretch!" said Iron, walking proudly over the collar of her shirt, as she imagined herself a locomotive, dragging a train of trains, across the rails.
"You old wretch!" said the Flatiron.
There are some tears on the edge of the shirt collar.So a pair of paper-cutting scissors came to cut these damaged places.
"Ouch!" said the shirt collar, "you must be a ballet dancer!
How straight are your legs!I have never seen such a beautiful gesture!No one in the world can imitate you! "
"I know that!" said the scissors.
"You deserve to be a countess!" said the collar of the shirt. "All I own is a fine gentleman, a boot remover and a comb. I just wish I had another earl!"
"Does he still want to propose?" said the scissors.She got angry and cut him firmly, so that he never recovered.
"I'd better propose to Combs!" said the collar of the shirt. "Dear girl! It's marvelous to see how well you keep your teeth. Have you never thought of betrothal?"
"Of course I did, and you already know," said Combs, "that I'm engaged to Bootstrapper!"
"Engaged!" said the shirt collar.
Now he has no chance to propose again.So he despises such things as love.
A long time has passed.Shirt collars come in boxes at a paper mill.Surrounded by a bunch of rag friends: the meticulous ones are with the delicate ones, and the rude ones are with the rude ones.They had a lot to tell, but the shirt collar had the most to tell, for he was a terrible cowboy.
"I've had a lot of lovers!" said the shirt collar. "I haven't even been quiet for an hour! I'm a handsome gentleman again, a starched man.
I have both a boot remover and a comb, but I never use them!You should look at my appearance at that time, look at my expression of ignoring people at that time!I can never forget my first love - it was a belt.She is so delicate, so gentle, so charming!She threw herself into a basin for me!Then there was a widow who got hot, but I ignored her until she was all black and blue!Then came the ballet dancers.She gave me a wound that still hasn't healed - she has such a bad temper!My comb was in love with me, and she lost all her teeth because of her lovelorn.Yes, things like this, I'm really a person!But the garter made me feel the worst--I mean the girdle, she jumped into the basin for me, and my conscience was very disturbed.I would rather become a blank sheet of paper! "
The same is true of the fact that all the rags have become blank paper, but the shirt collar has become the paper we see—on which the story was printed.The reason why things are done this way is because he likes to brag about things that have never happened before.We must remember this, lest we do the same thing, because we don't know, one day we will also come to a rag box and be made into a blank sheet of paper, on which all our history, even The most secret things get printed too, and we end up having to tell the story all over the place like this shirt collar.
① Comb teeth.
