Chapter 11 Chapter 9 The Search for the Way

She missed a morning class, and after lunch, she went out early.Thinking that she would soon leave school forever and go to the woolen factory, from her door to Jiangcun Primary School, that short bluestone path, she walked very long. Teacher Jiang called her into the Academic Affairs Office and asked her a few words, but she didn't mean to blame her at all.He happily took out a notebook from the drawer. On the notebook was a little girl in a red dress. She was kneeling on the green grass, puffing out her cheeks and blowing white dandelions into the air. "Caicai, that's great! Although I only finished sixth, this is a competition for the whole town!"

Teacher Jiang pointed to the competition results notification form and told her triumphantly, "Neither Lucun Elementary School nor Upper Elementary School has won prizes!" On that notification form, she suddenly saw Su Fanxing's name, his name, just in front of her, his score was the same as hers, they tied for sixth place.She suddenly became happy, as if there was some mysterious force in the dark that made her get close to him all of a sudden. "Study hard, you will have a bright future." She picked up the notebook and ran away. She pressed the notebook tightly to her heart. She didn't think about her future, her mother, or the wool kiln in the upper class that had opened the door to her. At the factory, she missed the boy who was her age with full satisfaction, and she thought that they were so similar and so destined, it must be something destined and arranged by God.She is going to find him, ah, when will she see him again?Seeing him again, she must hold hands with him, hold his hand, she will become as free as a butterfly, as light as a cloud, then they can take off together, and walk to the leaves together Come on, walk on the rainbow, let's step on the blue sky together...

Early on Sunday morning, she quietly ran to the bookstore in the town with her sweaty five yuan in her hand.In that small bookstore, in addition to comic books and student workbooks, there is also a small counter for famous books. She tiptoed to search for a long time in the counter, but she couldn't find the book "John Christophe" that Su Fanxing said. ".She had no choice but to run to the front of the counter and timidly ask the woman in black who was buried in her book. "Do you have this book?" She wrote the title on the white paper. The woman put down the book and looked at her through the black-rimmed glasses: "It was available two years ago, but it is sold out now."

She was extremely disappointed, and tears rolled in her eyes. "Oh—" the woman looked at her gently, "That's a good book, but I have better ones." The woman pulled out two thin new books from the bookcase, one was and the other was. She looked up at the sky, and the sun had already risen above her head. Without saying a word, she took the new book from the woman's hand and handed over the money in her hand.The woman gave her three yuan and eight cents. She put the money in the book, hugged the book in her arms, and ran back to Jiangcun quickly.When she ran to the fork in the road, a person came across. For some reason, she felt that his appearance was a little familiar. After running away, she stopped again and turned her head to look at him. He just stopped and was looking back at her. .It's Su Fanxing!Did he go to Jiangcun to find her?Surprised and delighted, she was about to run towards him, but a bicycle came across. It turned out to be Suxin's father and her cousin.

"Cai Cai, where are you going? I'll drive you home!" She suddenly became timid, she dared not recognize him in front of others.She slowly climbed onto the tail seat of the bicycle, and waited until the uncle turned around before she raised her hand and waved vigorously to her boy, who waved back to her and smiled shyly.The sun shines on his face, she thinks he is very beautiful, she thinks he is as beautiful as a prince. That semester was coming to an end soon, and all the new lessons were finished. Teacher Chen and Teacher Jiang copied out one exercise after another on the blackboard every day, and the children put their heads down and continued to do it one after another.

There are fewer and fewer girls in the class. They don't say anything, silently, and suddenly stop coming.At night, Suxin called Caicai, and went to the house of Shundi, who had dropped out of school, and Shundi went to a high-class woolen factory. The woolen factory did not recruit adults, but only half-grown girls, saying that it was because of girls' hands and feet. Fast, easy to learn things.The Shun brother who entered the woolen factory was also very happy. He wore newly made clothes and combed his hair. It seemed that he had grown up and matured all of a sudden, as if he was going to get married soon.

"You guys come too, the factory is still recruiting people." Shundi said. "My mother told me to finish this semester." Caicai said, "Suxin is still young." "Suxin can come too. We have a colleague who just finished fourth grade." Brother Shun said with a smile, "She's not as tall as Suxin." "Really?" Suxin was a little excited, "I'll go back and ask my dad." The two girls went back to Suxin's house. The uncle lit the water lamp and was weaving shrimp baskets: "Suxin is so small, why do you want to enter a woolen factory? You two are serious about studying hard. You will have a long life to do. when."

"Uncle, my mother told me to go to the woolen factory after finishing this semester." "Caicai, you don't listen to her. She is short-sighted. You listen to your uncle. You will go to high school, college, and do a big career in the future. Let them all open their eyes to see you." By the week of the exam, there were only three girls left in the class.Teacher Chen left after morning reading, and then came a few invigilators from central primary schools. Although they had never met each other, Caicai felt that they were very kind.Maybe they are Su Fanxing's teachers, she thought.She cheered up and tried to make every question perfect.

When she came home from the exam, her father was making a beautiful wooden box. "Who did you make the box for?" "Your brother's - wait until the summer vacation, you go to work in the woolen factory, and Apo goes to sell snow sticks." When the box was ready, her father taught her to paint the surface of the box.The paint is sky blue and has a very fresh smell.She painted as slowly and carefully as her father, until the case was smooth and even, as if cut from the blue sky. The snow bar box was drying in the shade. She ran over and touched it, and the more she looked at it, the more she liked it. The box was amazing. She felt a little regretful, why didn’t her brother go into the woolen factory and let her sell snow Article?

The next day, Jiang Caicai and Shundi went to the wool weaving factory to start work. The wool weaving factory was on the upper riverside. Because of the construction of this factory, a whole bamboo forest by the upper river was cut down and a hard concrete floor was laid. , several large trucks parked there. Caicai is a novice and does not know how to step on a sewing machine. The leading female worker arranged for her to sit beside the big table and cut the threads.A large pile of heavy sweaters, exuding the pungent smell of new clothes, Cai Cai imitated others, first moved a few clothes, and then took small scissors, starting from the collar, to find thread after thread , carefully cut them off.After finally getting off work, she walked out with Shundi, feeling tired and hungry: "Shundi, I don't like this factory at all, I like the bamboo forest in the old days—look at this concrete floor, here, again It won't grow bamboo anymore, how scary!"

"Caicai, don't think too much. What's the use of bamboo forests? Bamboo forests are everywhere. I think factories are much better than bamboo forests. Without this factory, where would we make money?" In a blink of an eye, it was the end of the month, and the girls lined up to collect money at the accountant's window.Finally it was Caicai's turn, and she received her first month's salary, twenty-five yuan.She was so disappointed, she was so disappointed that she wanted to cry.She suddenly felt that this work was so boring that she could no longer bear it.Everyone was immersed in their work. From time to time, some people mentioned that the man from so-and-so’s family became rich and had a mistress outside. Someone also mentioned that there was a man in Shangliu Village. He didn’t farm or work in a factory. Mahjong, even made a fortune, and built a small western-style house at home—Caicai didn’t want to hear these words at all, she felt bored, staring at a piece of clothing for a long time made her dizzy, sitting for a long time On the stool, her legs and feet are numb - she can't even stand up from time to time, turn on her favorite radio, or take a rest under the waterweed tree outside the door like when she is doing firecrackers at home!She calculated over and over again in her heart - if all the time for thread cutting this month was spent on firecrackers, she could definitely earn sixty or seventy yuan!But now, in this prison-like factory, she only received twenty-five yuan! The female worker who took the lead told her that after she cut the threads for another two months, she could go to the machine room to learn how to sew coils. As long as she learned how to sew coils, she could earn more than 100 yuan a month in the future.She secretly ran to Shundi's computer room, seeing Shundi repeating those monotonous movements like a robot, she suddenly felt a numbness in her scalp. That night, when she returned home and had dinner, she bravely told her father that she would never work in the woolen factory again. "I'd rather grow vegetables, cut grass, transplant seedlings, do small labor on construction sites, or carry coal and bricks with my third aunt...Anyway, I will never go to a woolen factory again!" After she finished speaking with a loud voice and angrily, Jiang Yibo also announced calmly: He will not sell snow bars anymore. He has been selling them for three days and is losing money every day. All the snow bars have melted and he has not sold a single one. ! ——Jiang Yibo said that selling snow bars makes people laugh, and his middle school classmates have seen him and despised him.From now on, even if he were to die, he would never sell it again. "Let me sell snow bars!" she said loudly, and she decided to snatch that career under the sun.She thought to herself, no matter how hard it is, selling snow sticks is better than going to a woolen factory, at least she can move freely in the sun.So decided, she picked up the beautiful box and fastened it tightly to the tail rack of her little bicycle with a long strap.Her heart was full of hope and courage. From tomorrow onwards, she would try to use this little sky blue box to support herself. From then on, she put on her little straw hat, rode a dilapidated bicycle, and carried her sky-blue snow-strip box, and walked into the sunny midsummer. She rode her bike around, and in the villages around the town, one road after another that she envied so much before, and one road after another that she had never walked before, she now walked one by one.In the depths of the neighboring villages, the main road splits into small roads, connects to the field ridges, and the field ridges branch in all directions.She got lost from time to time, and walked to the door of unknown people time and time again. The big dog and the little dog lying in front of the door jumped up from their deep sleep and yelled at her.She felt fresh, excited and joyful. She liked this kind of adventure. She walked into one charming village after another. She compared them with her dearest Jiangcun in her heart. different.Streams of flowing water, old trees, houses, and village women all have unique expressions because of the long history in this land—she feels that the grass, trees, flowers, birds, and weeds in the village Shrimp and clams are obviously different from the grass, trees, flowers, birds and weedes in the wild. They live in the same village as people, just like houses and relatives.She finished running on the surrounding roads and stopped wandering, because she quickly found the biggest customers. They were the workers who had just got off work in those brand-new factories, and they were sweating like rain on the construction sites in full swing. masons. At first she only sold ice cream, and soon, her beautiful ice cream box added ice cream and drinks.At the beginning, she earned five yuan a day, and soon she could earn ten yuan, twenty yuan, or even more.Every night, she sat alone under the lamp and counted the money, while night moths flew around the small electric lamp.She looked stern, calculating everything, regretting the melted ice cream.She put the money she earned into her wooden box, ten yuan, two yuan, sometimes more, she hoped that the weather would get colder soon, and the new year would come earlier, and she would bring the money she earned to If my uncle's house is given to my mother, my mother will be happy to hold her in her arms and praise her happily: "My family Caicai is very capable!" She packed up her purse, and then went to the kitchen to boil water. She took out a book from the woodpile. It was "Three Hundred Tang Poems" that had been with her for many years. She randomly picked out one and read it over and over again. Those age-old sentences are solemn and gorgeous, so far away from her, as if they have nothing to do with her.But how good. "The luminous cup of grape wine, if you want to drink the pipa, immediately remind you." How good it is. "Boundless fallen trees are rustling, and the endless Yangtze River is rolling in." How wonderful! "I don't have a colorful phoenix and two flying wings, but I have a tacit understanding." How wonderful!how nice! Like when she was a child, she never read more, she only read one sentence when burning a piece of wood.She read it over and over again, thinking over and over again, and slowly returned to the night thousands of years ago, and her country night turned into a gorgeous Tang night.Maybe she is a woman playing the pipa, maybe Su Fanxing is the general on horseback.She imagined, one plot by one, only characters, only scenes, no ending.The water boiled, but the firewood was not finished, and her story was not finished yet.But she made a decisive decision, put out the fire at once, put the poetry collection back into the woodpile, and then neatly filled the kettle with boiling water. She spread out the stationery on the table—at this time she had bought the most beautiful stationery in the stationery store in the town. She wrote to him, spread out the stationery and faced him, and her world opened a door, only At such moments, she felt fluid, she felt that she could smoothly open door after door and find her way to him.Holding a pen, her expressions were no longer difficult. She told him her desire, saying that she hoped to grow up quickly, she longed to become smart, powerful, and beautiful, but she couldn't do anything about it.She can't change the status quo, she's still stupid, weak, vulgar, ugly, and unable to live out her dreams. He wrote back to her, he wrote more letters than her, he encouraged her, he quoted from the book, told her that "knowledge can change fate" - he said he admired her, believed in her, he said that she must be able to create Regarding his own future, he said that she will definitely have a bright future. She wrote back, thinking that it was impossible, she said, maybe she could only be a woman who bought ice cream, or a female worker in a woolen factory-the world is so big, and she, I am afraid, could only be a little dog forever. A snail, wandering in a small corner; she may only be a frog at the bottom of a well forever, although she tries to stretch her neck and jumps in place, but she can only see a small piece of sky forever . She took the sealed letter and went to the mailbox in the village, and again and again, she solemnly dropped her letter in.The moonlight illuminates her face like flowing water, and illuminates the bluestone road under her feet brightly and movingly. She carried the snow box and walked her own way. She passed Su Fanxing's door time and time again, but she didn't dare to stop, and she didn't dare to go up the narrow stairs and walk into his real world.She could only look at the balcony of his house from a distance, she envied that balcony, envied the rose flowers on the balcony, imagined him pouring clean water on the flowers and leaves, envied how close they were to him, envied how they were with him He sees each other day and night.She talked to the silent flower silently, talked to it about him, she wished him well, and wished him well.She wrote to him every night, and she wrote to herself, never caring whether he answered or not. Every day after four o'clock in the afternoon, all the children selling snow bars in the town gathered in front of the Big Mac shoe factory. When the off-duty workers flocked out, their business suddenly prospered. Except for her, the rest of the snow bar sellers are all boys, and almost all of them adopt the method of waiting for rabbits. A few of them stand under a tree, chatting and laughing, waiting for customers to come.In contrast, Caicai is much more active. She stands on the side of the road that must be passed by people, yells loudly in half-salted Mandarin, smiles at her customers, and asks them about their hometowns, knowing that they are from far away. Hunan, Hubei and Sichuan, she feels mysterious and longing for those unfamiliar place names. "In winter, it will snow in my hometown. We build snowmen on the snow and have snowball fights. It's very fun." A beautiful Hunan girl made friends with her and came to talk to her every day after dinner. She was very envious: "That's great, I've never seen snow before." "Do you want to see it? It's very easy. When you grow up, go home with me, and you can see it." Her name is Lin Xuemei, she is a head taller than Cai Cai, she has big eyes, an apple face, and fair skin , she was eighteen years old, and she asked Cai Cai to call her sister. When sister Xuemei went to work the night shift, Adong would come to her. A Dong's eyes are two dark stars, he is a happy and playful boy, he can come up with any idea when he rolls his eyes. He had sold the last of his ice sticks and was counting the money.A Dong's money was neither too much nor too little, and he spent all he earned.He came out to sell snow bars just for fun during the summer vacation, and his parents never asked for his money. It was getting dark soon, and a few small sun-like gas lamps in front of the shoe factory were lit up. "It can't be sold out. Who told you to carry so many goods? I'll count the sticks for you later." But she can always sell out, and there are always many workers who come to the riverside to enjoy the shade, and there are always people helping her from time to time, and there is not a single canteen in the vicinity. She lowered her head to read the book, looked up at him from time to time, and met his warm gaze, feeling comforted and sad in her heart.He invited her to "Linji Cold Drink Shop" to drink sugar water. The two of them put their feet under the table, and the atmosphere gradually became delicate. The two of them ate with their heads down, motionless, as if they were afraid of running away.Once, their feet accidentally touched each other, and he was foolishly next to her, but she kicked him hard. He looked at her innocently, felt pain, and couldn't speak.One day he suddenly wrote her a letter and secretly stuffed it into her box.She saw it when she got home at night, and saw the crooked words, clumsily scratched through the back of the paper, with a few irrelevant words written on it, and an irrelevant song copied.She despised him in her heart. A Dong was already in the second year of junior high school, and his handwriting was not as good as hers, let alone Su Fanxing. A Dong looked at her and felt that her short nose was really ugly, and she was so stupid for concentrating on everything, but she was so pretty when she smiled foolishly.She is different from him, he is indifferent to everything, but she is very focused on everything-including selling ice cream, including going to school.She was younger than he, and yet she eluded him, and perhaps it was because she bewildered him that she was attractive.He liked being with her for no reason, and was willing to say funny things to make her laugh. The other kids sometimes bully her because she steals their business by throwing half-melted icicles in her hair.They ran to her on purpose, stepped on her bare feet without shoes, and when they hurt, she shed tears miserably. She tried her best not to cry in front of others, so they laughed triumphantly and rode on their bicycles. Fly away.A Dong was also laughing, A Dong thought she was really ridiculous.Grinning, he runs up to her and removes the sticky ice cubes from her hair. After a while, he gradually got to know her and felt sorry for her, especially she didn't know that she was pitiful, but she rushed forward like a little beast. He didn't know what was going on in her heart, he guessed, He couldn't figure it out anyway. I don't know when, he started sending things to her.She seldom received presents, but when she got them she felt happy, happy for the whole day.She was so easy to be happy, and he liked to tease her more and more. She loves to read, and there is always a book in the snow box.When there were few customers, she sat down under the tree and read the book intently. She had already finished reading it, so she went back to read it again.So he ran to the bookstore, bought a copy, and stuffed it into her sky-blue ski box when she wasn't looking. He didn't tell her, but he hid a secret in his heart and went home, which was also interesting.She found out when she came home at night. She was so happy that she couldn't sleep at night, so she lit a fire and water lamp and got up to read a book.After reading it in one breath, she guessed that it was sent by A Dong, but she was not sure, for fear that he would laugh at her.The next day neither of them talked about this matter, it seemed that the book ran into her box by itself.But she was happy, overflowing with joy, as if a bright yellow joy flowed to her body. She laughed all day long.She stood by the side of the road, guarding her sky-blue snow-strip box, she sang alone, as if she was the only one in the world, she sang one by one with a rustling voice, he stood not far away, I thought she sang really badly, and really wanted to run over and teach her a lesson and tell her to shut up.But no one could stop her, and she sang louder and louder. Once he bought Xi Murong's "Jiulixiang" for her. It was a very popular book at that time, and the boys in middle school secretly copied the poems in it for the girls they liked.A Dong followed suit and copied a paragraph for her: let me say goodbye Gently pull out my hand I know that longing takes root from now on Floating clouds, white sun, mountains and rivers, majestic and gentle He didn't know that he wanted to say goodbye to her, and he copied these poems just out of the boy's sad intuition.But she liked it very much, as if she liked it for something. After a few days, she could almost memorize the whole book of little poems.She was happy to let him accompany her, and the two of them rode bicycles aimlessly along the long embankment of Dongjiang River.She sometimes talks a lot and sometimes says nothing. Sometimes she would ask him enthusiastically, "Do you know Wang Wei?" He said honestly, "I don't know." She told him Wang Wei's poems, and recited to him "Walk to the poor water, sit and watch the clouds rise." Once she asked him: "Do you know John Christophe?" A Dong said, "I don't know." As a rule he did not know. She sighed, looking very unhappy. "Tell me, tell me about Dove." He begged her. But she was not happy, so she stopped talking, and instead complained to him, "Why don't you know anything?" He was baffled, so he had to change the subject, and suggested, "Let's drink sugar water." She is silent. "I'll catch crabs for you to play with." She didn't care, she was going home alone. "By the way, the rich man is opening tonight, I'll go and steal some colorful flags for you to play with!" She let go of the bicycle handle and clapped her hands: "Really?!" Of course it was true, and he came back on his bicycle in no time, holding a purple silk flag in his hand. "I don't want this, I want orange, red, green!" She sat on the big rock by the water and threw the purple flag into the water.The flag drifted away with the water, and slowly sank into the water, like a gauze of a water fairy, out of sight. A Dong blew a loud whistle, jumped on his bicycle, and went far away in an instant.She was left sitting in the dark, feeling extremely lonely. She saw the opening of the rich man from a distance, the colorful lights were spinning, many people were dancing on the terrace, and the strong music shook the Dongjiang River, predicting that there would be no peace for several miles around here.Someone sang karaoke and yelled "I can't stop loving you!!!" in a hoarse voice—the singing voice was amplified dozens of times, as if it was about to burst the night.On the beach not far away, some people lit a fire to barbecue and drink. From time to time, there were men's laughter and women's screams. The just-opened nightclub was very lively, the river bank was brightly lit up and down, and the shadows of the lights on the water shone brilliantly in the waves of the night boat.The waves are flowing and continuous, lively and fragrant.Yet she didn't like it at all.Just where she was sitting, there was a luxuriant acacia tree on the other side of the river. When she was a child, she used to swim there. She used to sit under the tree for a long time, looking up at the tree full of white flowers. She was moved and surprised.Now, it was time for the acacia to bloom. She tried her best to look across the other bank, but she only saw clusters of tree shadows, and couldn't see the details clearly.She imagined that she was trying her best to draw bright flowers on the tree shadow, so that they could illuminate this inexplicable night. "Hey—here we come!" She looked towards the road and saw that A Dong was driving the car in one hand and came back with a lot of colorful flags in the other.She ran over and wanted to take the colorful flag, but A Dong told her, "Go, they are coming!" Two uniformed security guards ran after him from behind.A Dong blew his whistle and rode his bicycle, and fled forward like flying. She was standing on the side of the road, and a little beggar grabbed her pants: "Please, please." She stared at her, with a sharp little face, sickly, only five or six years old .Cai Cai forcefully broke free from her hand and threw her aside. She threw the unfinished bread to her, and then quickly ran back to her bicycle. Next to her bicycle, a foreign woman knelt on the ground with a child on her back, and a black paper full of red letters was placed in front of her.Jiang Caicai put the fifty cents note in her pocket in front of her, and she didn't look at the deceitful pleading on the red paper, and didn't look at the woman's stupid and pitiful face. She rode her bicycle and walked through the newly built small park in the town. The trees in the small park were lit with green headlights, and a beam of green light shone on the leaves, giving off a false and delicate brilliance.Under the big tree, there are more beggars from other provinces.What a poor tree!It must be very sad.she thinks. She went all the way forward, riding her bicycle quickly, and entered that lonely path. She heard the wind whistling in her ears, and felt that her feet were walking on thin ice, as if she was about to slip into the bottomless abyss if she was not careful. Ah, one lamp after another, one lamp shadow after another lamp shadow, one person after another, there must be some people living a happy life that she doesn't know?Where are those people?She imagines them, but doesn't know them. Does happiness really exist in this world?Are those happy people breathing and walking in this world just like Jiang Caicai? She felt that she was so weak, so poor, she was powerless to change everything she met and encountered, she couldn't save the drowning person who came to her. The night gradually deepened, and when she reached the entrance of the village, she got off her bicycle, slowly pushed the bicycle, and walked past the newly built house in Jiangcun. The sound of TV and mahjong could be heard from every window. (End of Chapter 9)