Chapter 9 3

It's a tough time to get through emotionally.Marley had to change his mind, or he'd have to leave.The next night, when I got home from get off work, I walked in the front door and yelled, "I'm home!" As usual, Marley sprinted across the wooden floors to greet me.For the last ten paces, he chose to glide as if he were on ice, then flew up and slammed his claws into my chest and face.The moment his claws touched my body, I quickly raised my knees and pressed against his chest lightly.He gasped softly, then slipped to the floor, looking at me with a hurt expression, trying to figure out what was wrong with me.He has always jumped on me like this, how could he expect a sudden sneak attack?

The next night, I repeated the punishment.He jumped up and I gave a little knee and he fell to the floor, coughing.I thought it was cruel, but if I wanted to protect him from the classifieds, I knew I had to let him know that. "I'm sorry, man," I said, and leaned over so he could pat me with all four paws on the ground, "It's all for your own good." When I walked in the door on the third night, he jumped up from the corner and charged at me, using his typical high-speed braking skills as he approached me.This time, however, he changed his usual approach.Instead of jumping up, he kept his paws on the ground and slammed headfirst into my knees, nearly knocking me over.I take this performance of his as a victory for my corrective measures. "You did it, Marley! You did it! Boy! You didn't jump up." Then I got down on my knees so he could drool over me without me risking the straw puncher The danger of trying to suck his drool out on the floor.The success this time is really impressive.Marley had succumbed to the force of persuasion.

However, the problem has not been really resolved.He may have cured himself of jumping on me, but his habit of jumping on other people has not been cured.The dog was so smart that he figured out that the knee attack was just a threatening gesture from me, so he knew he could still jump on top of the other guy with no penalty.It seems that I need to increase my attack power.To do this, I enlisted a good friend at work, a reporter named Jim Tolbin.Jim is a mild-mannered, slightly bookish, bald, bespectacled, thin man.If Marley thought he could jump on someone without consequences, it was Jim.One day, in the office, I confided to Jim my plan: He would come to our house after get off work, ring the bell, walk in, and when Marley jumped up and kissed him, he would follow My command put a light knee on Marley. "Don't feel embarrassed," I instructed him. "If you're lenient and use too little force, it won't do anything for Marley."

That night, Jim rang my doorbell and walked in.Marley did fall into our trap, and he sprinted toward Jim with his ears flapping behind his head.Jim took my advice to heart when Marley got off the ground and jumped on top of him.My concern that he might be too timid was obviously misplaced, and he delivered a devastating blow to Marley's solar plexus with his knee, nearly knocking him unconscious. .The loud bang of his knee hitting his chest was audible across the room.Marley let out a loud groan, his eyes widened, and he sprawled on the floor. "My God, Jim," I said, "you don't know Chinese Kung Fu?"

"You told me to make him feel something." He replied innocently. He did make Marley feel something.Marley stood up, panting, and greeted Jim the way a dog should—with all four paws above the ground.If he could talk, I swear he would have said, "I surrender!" Marley never jumped on anyone again, at least not in my presence, and no one else Knee towards his chest or something. Not long after Marley gave up his habit of jumping on people, I woke up one morning to find my wife had returned.My Jenny, the woman I loved so much, the woman who had vanished in the fog of melancholy and became utterly stubborn, came back to me now.As sudden as the postpartum depression had been when it overwhelmed her, the ebb and flow of the symptoms had been sudden.It was as if the demon possessed by her had just been exorcised.They were driven away.Thankfully, was driven away.She was strong and optimistic again, and not only was she able to handle all the difficulties and challenges of being a mother of two, but she thrived.Marley has regained her favor and a rock-solid sense of security.Jenny had one arm around a child and leaned in to kiss Marley.She played sticks with him and made him a delicious broth out of the juices that oozed from the ground beef.She danced with him around the room as a beautiful song blared from the stereo.Sometimes, at night, when he was quiet, I would find her lying on the floor with him, her head resting in the crescent of his neck.Jenny is back.Thank God she's back.

Some things in life are so weird it feels like it can never be real.That's how I felt when Jenny called me from the office to tell me that Marley was auditioning for a movie.I know she can't be fictional.But I'm still not quite convinced. "A what?" I asked. "An audition for a movie." "Like the kind of movie shown in theaters?" "Yeah, like a movie that shows in theaters, dumb," she said, "a movie that's the length it should be." "Marley? A movie as long as it should be?" The two of us went through several rounds of question and answer on the phone as I was trying to get the image of our family dog ​​with the head like an elm lump and who would put an ironing board in his mouth to chew , reconciled with the image of a proud dog prancing across the screen, rescuing helpless children from burning buildings.

"Our Marley?" I asked again, just to be sure. But it is true.A week ago, Jenny's director of the Palm Beach Post called and said she had a friend who needed our help.The friend was a local photographer named Colleen Mikka, who had been hired by a film production company in New York City called Shooting Range to plan for them a film in Lake Worth, just south of us. in town - a film I made to help.Colleen's job was to find a "typical South Florida home" and shoot it from head to toe—bookcases, refrigerators, closets, you name it—to help the director Brings a sense of realism to the film.

"The whole crew was gay," the boss told Jenny, "and they were trying to understand how married couples with kids lived here." "It was like an anthropological study," Jenny said. "exactly." "Of course," Jenny agreed, "as long as I don't have to clean the house first." Colleen came to our house and started taking pictures, not just of our belongings, but of us in her shots too – the way we dress, the way we comb our hair, The way we stretch out on the couch.She photographed the toothbrush on the sink, she photographed the toddler in the crib, and she photographed the eunuch dog of our typical heterosexual couple.As she observed, "he seemed a little confused".

Marley wouldn't have been so excited to be a part of it.Once Marley believes that Patrick and Crowe have been violated by others, he will immediately launch a war of words against the predator, thus expressing his deep friendship to the children.Colleen could have poked Marley with a stock-piercer, however, she was someone who loved animals and wasn't intimidated by a drool bath, so she crouched down and He launched a wrestling of friendship first and competition second. As Colleen kept snapping the camera shutter, I couldn't help but think of all kinds of possibilities.Not only are we being fed raw anthropological data to filmmakers, but we are, in fact, being given rehearsals of our own personal choice of actors.I've heard that most of the secondary actors and all the extras in this movie will be hired locally.Maybe the director will find a rising star with acting talent among a lot of photos!Strange things always happen.

So I pictured that director in my mind.In my imagination, the director, who looks a lot like Steve Spielberg, leans against a huge table covered with hundreds of photographs, impatiently Flipping through the photos, he muttered, "Garbage! Rubbish! None of this works." Then, his hand stopped on a snapshot of a single person, and he froze.In the photo, a typical heterosexual man, already wrinkled but still full of sensuality, is going about the business of a family man.The director dug his fingers into the photo and yelled at his assistant: "Find me this man! I must use him in this film!" When they finally found my Sometimes, before I finally agree to accept the role that will make me famous in the future, I will humbly hold back at first, after all, this drama must be staged.

Colleen thanked us for opening our home for her to shoot, and she left.She doesn't give us any reason to believe that she, or anyone else associated with the film, will return.Now, our duty is done.However, a few days later, Jenny called me from the office and said, "I just talked to Colleen Mikka on the phone, you won't believe it." At this moment, I have no doubt that I must have been discovered by the director up.My heart was about to fly out of my chest with excitement. "Go on," I said. "She said the director wanted Marley to try it out." "Marley?" I asked, to make sure I heard correctly.She didn't seem to notice the frustration in my voice. "Obviously, he seemed like a big, goofy, slightly disturbed dog who could play the role of a family pet, and Marley caught the attention of the director." "Something out of order?" I asked. "Colleen said that's exactly the kind of dog the director wanted. Big, goofy, and a little bit off." Well, he really is the perfect guy for the role. "Did Colleen mention if the director talked about me?" I still don't give up. "No," replied Jenny, "why is he talking about you?" Colleen picked Marley up the next day.Knowing the importance of this opportunity, Marley sprinted across the living room to meet her, stopping for a moment, snatching the nearest pillow, and taking it in his mouth, because you never know a busy Marley wishes he had been prepared for when his film director would take a nap, should he ever need one. When he reached the wooden floor, he slammed on the brakes and stopped until he hit the coffee table, and then he collided with a chair, landed on his back, rolled, and he put He returned to his normal posture, and then had a head-on collision with Colleen's leg.At least, he didn't jump on top of her, which I noticed. "Are you sure you don't want us to sedate him?" Jenny asked. Colleen insisted that the director wanted to see him bohemian and drug-free.So she drove off in her red pickup truck with our very happy dog ​​sitting beside her. Two hours later, Colleen returned with her partner, and the verdict was in: Marley passed the audition. "Oh!" Jenny screamed, "Impossible!" Our elation and triumph were not dampened when Colleen told us that Marley was the only dog ​​that auditioned.Our joy and elation are not dampened when she very gently breaks the bad news that Marley is the only unpaid character in the film. I asked her about the audition process. "I sat in the car with Marley and it was like driving in a jacuzzi," she said. "He drooled on everything. When I got him there I was drenched by the time I got there." When they arrived at the Bay Hotel, where the production headquarters was staying, a faded tourist landmark overlooking the Intracoastal Waterway, Marley jumped out of the van and walked to the hotel. Leaping out and running excitedly erratically across the parking lot, as if anticipating the looming air bomb at any moment, he impresses the crew with his antics. "He seemed to be mad," she recounted, "totally out of his wits." "Yeah, he's kind of excited," I said. She went on to say that Marley snatched the checkbook from one of the crew and ran off. He made a series of figure-eights and then disappeared. The only way to guarantee a salary. "We call him our runaway Labrador," Jenny apologized to Colleen, but she had the smile of a proud mother. Marley eventually calmed down and convinced everyone that he was up to the role, since it was basically just him playing himself.This movie called "The Last Home Run" tells about a dream about baseball: a seventy-nine-year-old man living in a nursing home, with the help of a magical external force, has the ability to become a twenty-year-old Five days for the young lad, during which he was able to realize his dream of playing in the baseball league.Marley plays the hyperactive dog at the baseball coach's home, while retired league catcher Gary Carter plays the coach. "Do they really want him in their movie?" I asked, still skeptical. "Everybody liked him," Colleen said. "He was nice." In the days leading up to filming, we noticed a subtle change in Marley's behavior as well.He seemed unusually calm, as if the audition had given him new confidence.He exuded the majestic and dignified look of a king. "Maybe he just needs someone to trust him," I told Jenny. If anyone had faith in Marley, it was her—the mother of this extraordinary future showbiz star.On the countdown to the first day of filming, she bathed him, she brushed his fur, she cut his nails and scrubbed his ears. The morning the film was about to start, I came out of the bedroom to find Jenny and Marley entangled in what looked like a deadly struggle, bouncing around the room.She straddled him, holding his ribs tightly with her knees and holding his neck tightly with one hand as he kept jumping and leaning to throw her off. The end of the chain.It's like watching a rodeo in my own living room. "For God's sake, what are you doing?" I asked. "What does that look like?" she retorted. "Brush his teeth!" If so, she held a toothbrush in the other hand, trying to scrub Marley's big, white ivory teeth clean, and Marley, who had a huge foam in his mouth, I'm trying my best to eat my toothbrush.He looked absolutely berserk. "Did you use toothpaste?" I asked, a question that actually avoided the larger question. "Aren't you going to make him spit out the toothpaste?" "Sodium bicarbonate," she replied. "Thank God," I said, "otherwise I thought he had rabies!" An hour later we set off for the Bay Hotel, the children in their seats and Marley between them, gasping for breath in short, labored breaths because the air in the car wasn't very clean.Our meeting time was agreed to be at 9:00 am, but there was a traffic jam and the traffic stopped.There are barricades in front of the road and a police officer is diverting traffic in the direction of the hotel.The local newspapers have covered the filming in great detail - it's been fifteen years since "Body Temperature" was filmed there, so it's now a long-awaited event. A big event in the town of Lake Worth was a huge sensation - attracting a large audience to watch the filming of the film.The police kept order and kept people from flocking.We moved slowly inch by inch through the traffic, and when we finally came to the policeman, I rolled down the window and said, "We need to get through." "No one can pass," he replied. "Keep going. Let's go." "We're here to send the actors off," I said. He looked at us suspiciously: a couple in a minivan with two toddlers and a family pet. "I said go!" he growled. "Our dog is going to be in this movie," I said. Suddenly, he looked at me with reverence. "Your dog?" he asked.That dog was also on his record list. "Our dog," I replied, "is called Marley." "Play himself." Jenny hurriedly added. He turned and whistled loudly. "He's brought a dog!" he yelled at another cop half a block away. "Marley's dog!" Then it was the policeman's turn to yell at the next policeman, "He's brought a dog! Marley's dog!" "Let them pass!" shouted a third policeman from a distance. "Let them pass!" echoed the second policeman. The police removed the barricades and waved us through. "Go this way," he said politely.I felt like I was being honored like a member of the royal family. "He's brought a dog," he said again, as if he couldn't quite believe it yet, as we drove past him. In the parking lot outside the hotel, the crew is preparing for the start.Cables were criss-crossed across the sidewalk; camera tripods and amplifiers were set up.Lights hung from scaffolding.The trailer was filled with luggage racks filled with clothing.Two large tables were placed under the shade of the trees, and they were filled with food and drink for the cast and crew.Those who look prominent in dark glasses are busy.Director Bob Koss greeted us and gave us a brief synopsis of an upcoming scene.The scene was simple: A minivan pulled up on the side of the road and Marley's owner, played by the actress Lisa Harris, drove up.Her son and daughter were also in the car.Her daughter is played by a very sweet teenage girl named Danielle from a local acting school, while her son is played by a young local actor under nine years old.Joining them in the back of the car is their family dog, played by Marley.The daughter opened the sliding door and hopped out; followed by her brother and Marley on a leash around his neck.They gradually faded out of the camera lens.This game is over. "Easy," I told the director, "he should be able to handle it, no problem." I pulled Marley aside and waited for the director to prompt him to get inside the van. "Okay, listen up, everybody," Koss told the crew, "this dog is kind of crazy, but unless he totally ruins the scene, we're going to keep going." He explained his thoughts : Marley is the real thing—a typical family dog, and our intention was to capture his natural behavior as a typical family dog ​​during a typical family outing.No acting or directing, just a show of its own accord. "Just let him be himself," he directed, "and we shoot around him." When everyone was ready for the shoot, I took Marley into the van and handed the nylon leash around his neck to the little boy, who looked a little scared of Marley . "He's friendly," I told him, "he just wanted to lick you. See?" I stuck my wrist in Marley's mouth to demonstrate. First pass: The van pulls up on the side of the road.The daughter slid open the side door and a yellow-striped guy "shot" out of the car like a furball from a cannon, trailing a red belt behind him.He flashes past the camera quickly. "stop!" I chased Marley around the parking lot and finally got him back. "Ok, guys, let's try again," Coase said.Then he directed kindly to the little boy: "This dog is a bit wild. Try to hold the leash a little tighter this time." Second pass: The van pulls up on the side of the road.The side door slid open.Before her daughter could appear outside the car, a buff mass appeared, and Marley jumped past her.This time, the little boy with pale knuckles and pale face was dragged behind him. "stop!" Third pass: The van stops.The side door slid open.The daughter appeared.The boy appeared, belt in hand.The leash was pulled tight as he walked out of the van, the other end still in the van, but no dog followed.The boy began tugging, pulling, and pulling.He leaned his body, and he probably used up all his strength to feed the baby.Yet the belt didn't move the slightest bit.Long, painful, fruitless minutes passed by.The boy's face contorts from the exertion, and finally, he turns his head resignedly to look at the camera. "stop!" I looked into the van and saw Marley leaning over to lick himself in a place no man would lick.He looked up at me as if to say, "Don't you see I'm busy?" Fourth pass: I settled Marley in the back of the van with the little boy and closed the door.He paused for a few minutes to consult with his assistant before Kos yelled, "Shooting!"Finally, the scene was filmed.The truck was parked on the side of the road.The side door slid open.The daughter came out.The boy came out, however, with a bewildered expression on his face.He stares straight at the camera, throwing his hands up.Half of the belt was hanging from his hand, the end of the belt was jagged and dripping with saliva. "Stop! Stop! Stop!" The boy explained that while he was waiting inside the van, Marley started chewing on the belt without stopping.The crew and actors stared at the severely damaged belt in disbelief, their faces were mixed with awe and fear, as if they had just witnessed some kind of huge mysterious natural force .And I'm not surprised at all.Marley has buried more straps and ropes than I can count.He even managed to "break out of prison" by biting off a rubber-coated wire rope, which was advertised as "used in airlines."Not long after Crowe was born, Jenny brought home a new product—a travel leash on the dog that she could use to buckle Marley into the car seat belt so he could Impossible to wander around in a moving car anymore.In the first ninety seconds of using the new device, Marley managed to bite through not only the heavy harness but also the shoulder pads that protected our new minivan. "Okay, everyone, let's take a break!" Kos yelled.He turned to face me, then—in a surprisingly calm voice—asked, "How soon can you find a new belt?" Every minute wasted while the cast and crew sat around with nothing to do was costing him dollars. "There's a pet store half a mile from here," I said, "and I'll be back in fifteen minutes." "This time, we must bring back something that he can't bite off." He ordered. I brought back a heavy chain that looked like something a lion tamer would use, and the movie got going, but it failed over and over again, and every time Each one was worse than the last.At that moment, the teenage actress, Danielle, let out a desperate scream, her voice full of genuine fear: "Oh my God! That thing in his dick is gone! " "stop!" In another scene, while Danielle is on the phone, Marley gasps at her feet so loudly that the sound engineer angrily removes the headset, Then complained loudly: "I can't hear a word she said. All I can hear is heavy breathing, it sounds like a pornographic movie." "stop!" The first day of shooting went like this.Marley is a disaster, a total disaster, and beyond redemption.On the one hand I was justifying myself: "Okay, are you guys expecting to get a good shot without getting paid?" On the other hand I was devastated.Subconsciously, I sneaked a glance at the cast and crew, and I could see the pain on their faces: "Where the hell did we get this animal? How can we get him back?" At the end of filming that day At the time, an assistant with a clipboard in hand told us that the final decision on the shooting lineup would not be made until tomorrow. "Don't bother you to come here again tomorrow," he said, "If we ever need Marley, we'll call you." Just to make sure his words didn't cause any confusion for me, he repeated : "So please don't come over unless you get a call from us. Got it?" "Yes, of course I get it," I replied loudly and clearly.Coase dispatched his subordinates to complete the drudgery that knocked us out.This was the end of Marley's fledgling acting career.But I can't blame them.Marley has staged one of the greatest symbolic nightmares in the history of filmmaking.Thousands of dollars were lost in wasted film and unnecessary delays that he had just caused.He also had countless costumes smeared with dirt, he attacked the diner table and nearly knocked over a $30,000 video camera.They're cutting their losses -- removing Marley as the dog.It's the old "don't call us, we'll call you" formula. "Marley," I said when we got home, "you really ruined your big chance." When the phone rang the next morning, I was still reeling from the endless anguish and frustration of my broken stardom.It was the assistant who called and told us to take Marley to the hotel as soon as possible. "You mean you want him back?" I was quite surprised. "Right now," he replied, "Bob wants him to do one." Thirty minutes later, I arrived at the Bay Hotel, still not quite convinced that they had actually invited us back.Kos greeted us warmly.He had watched yesterday's unedited and edited film footage, and he couldn't be happier. "That dog is hysterical! It's ridiculous!" he gushed. "It's hilarious. What a reckless, frenzied genius dog!" The chest also stood up. "We always knew he was a genius," Jenny said proudly. Filming continued for several days around Lake Worth, while Marley continued to get his chance at fame.We wandered around the set with the other actors' parents and entourage, chatting and socializing, and then, as soon as the backstage crew yelled "ready to shoot," we suddenly fell silent.When the director shouted "stop", our social meeting will continue again.Jenny even managed to get baseball preeminent players Gary Carter and Dave Winfield, who were featured in the film, to sign baseballs for our two sons. Marley was licking the stars.The staff of the crew, especially the female staff, tried their best to please him.Due to the scorching heat, an assistant was specially assigned a task to follow Marley with a bowl and a bottle of mineral water to meet his drinking needs at any time.Each feeds him with snacks from the table where light meals or snacks are served.I handed Marley over to the crew for a few hours while I was reporting to the newspaper, and when I returned to the set, I found him sprawled on the ground like a king, paws in the air, leisurely Get a belly massage from a heavily made-up actress. "He's so sweet," she said softly. The stars also started nodding at me.So I started introducing myself as "Marley's trainer and manager" and boasted, "For his next film, we want to play a bark character." During a filming break, I walked into the hotel Go to the lobby to use the coin operated payphones.Marley, with his neck strap unbuckled, was sniffing the furniture in the lobby a few steps away from me.A doorman apparently mistook my star dog for a stray animal stopped Marley and tried to herd him out a side door. "Go home!" he scolded. "Hush!" "Excuse me?" I said, covering the receiver of the phone with my hand, and staring at the doorman with the most uncomfortable eyes. "Don't you know who you're talking to?" We were on set four days in a row, and by the time we were told Marley was all done and his services were no longer needed, Jenny and I felt like we were part of the Shooting Range Films family. Part of it.Even though we are the only unpaid members of this extended family, we are still part of it.When we summon Marley into the minivan, Jenny blurts out to those within earshot without thinking: "We love you guys! Can't wait to see the finished edit." !" But all we can do is to wait patiently.One producer told us they needed eight months and then we could call and they would send us the dailies.However, eight months later, when I called, a front desk person put me on hold for a while, and a few minutes later, he came back on the phone and said, "Why don't you wait a few months? Try it?" I had to wait another few months, then tried to call again, only to get the same disappointing answer as last time.我又等待了一段时间，又打电话过去，反反复复好几次，可是每一次都被搪塞和拖延。我甚至能够想像到接待员是怎样用手捂住话筒，低声对坐在剪辑桌子旁的科斯说道：“那个疯狂的狗主人又打电话来了。您希望我这次怎么跟他说？” 最后，我终于不再打电话过去了，无可奈何地接受了我们永远都不会看到《最后的本垒打》这一宿命了，相信其他人也都不可能看到这部电影了，这一计划已经被丢弃在剪辑室的地板上了，其原因是，将那只该死的狗从每一场戏中剪辑出去，是一项艰难到无法完成的巨大挑战。等到我最终有机会欣赏到马利的表演技巧的时候，已经是整整两年之后了。 那一次我是一时兴起，问办公室里的员工是否知道一部名叫《最后的本垒打》的电影，结果，他的回答让我仿佛被巨型炸弹击中一样。他不仅知道这部电影，而且还有存货。事实上，他不仅有幸拥有该部电影的录像带，而且数量还不止一盘。 之后我便得知了整个悲惨的故事：由于无法吸引国内的发行商，所以射击场公司没有其他的选择，只能将马利的首次演出转变为了电影胶片最不光彩的命运：《最后的本垒打》被直接制成了录像带而没有进入影院播放。可是我对此并不介意。我带着一卷录像带冲回了家，把詹妮和两个孩子叫到了录像机旁。正如办事员告诉我的那样，马利在整个片子当中的出场时间总共还不到两分钟，可是我不得不说，这短短的两分钟却是整部影片里最为生动、最为真实的片段。我们开怀大笑！我们喜极而泣！我们欢呼雀跃！ “那是马利！”克罗尖声叫道。 “我们出名了！”帕特里克大声喊道。 然而马利似乎不为所动，他打着呵欠，在咖啡桌下面爬行着。等到影片结束播放演员表的时候，他居然呼呼大睡了。当所有演员的名字在屏幕上滚动而过的时候，我们摒息静气、聚精会神地盯着电视机。一分钟过去了，我以为我们的狗没有列在名册当中了。然而，就在这个时候，屏幕上出现了所有人都可以看到的大写字母：“名叫马利的狗……扮演自己。”