Chapter 17 seventeen

The next day I saw Zinaïda, but only for a moment, and she was going somewhere in a cab with the princess.But when I saw Lushin and Malevsky, Lushin only greeted me reluctantly, and the young count, grinning, spoke to me in a friendly manner.Of all the guests in the small wing, he was the only one who managed to get in my door and win my mother's favor.His father despised him and treated him with insulting politeness. "Ah, monsieurlepuge," began Maleevsky, "it is a pleasure to meet you. What is your beautiful queen doing?" His radiant, handsome face annoyed me so much at the moment, and he looked at me with disdainful, mocking eyes, so I paid him no attention at all.

"Are you still mad at me?" he went on. "That's unnecessary. You should know that I didn't call you the young guard, but the queen is the one who needs the young guard. Please let me say to you that you are not doing your job well. " "How did you see it?" "A young guard should never leave his queen; a young guard should know everything the queen does, and should even watch her;" he added in a low voice, "to watch her day and night." "What do you mean by that?" "What do I mean by that? I think I've made it very clear. Watch day and night. It doesn't matter during the day, because it's bright and there are many people; but at night, you must be careful not to make trouble. I advise you not to sleep at night, but to watch. Watch as best you can. Remember, at night, in the garden, by the fountain . . . these are places that must be seen. You will thank me."

Malevsky couldn't help laughing, and he turned his back on me.What he said to me probably meant nothing in particular.He has the reputation of a great liar, and at masquerade balls he is famous for being a good fool, and for the almost unconscious falsehood that permeates his whole body... He was just trying to tease me; but His every word flowed like poison into my veins.The blood rushed straight to my head. "Ah! That's it!" I said to myself. "Well! So I was led into the garden for no reason! Never let that happen!" I don't know what to never let happen. "Could it be that Malevsky himself will go to the garden," I thought (perhaps he gave away the secret in the chat: he has a thick skin for such a thing), "could it be someone else (our garden The fence is very low, and it is effortless to climb in), but whoever touches me, he will be in trouble! I advise you, no one touches me! I want to say to the people of the world and her heartless woman (I You actually called her a heartless woman) Proof, I will take revenge!"

I went back to my room and took out a British-made pocket knife I bought not long ago from the desk drawer. I touched its sharp blade, frowned, made up my mind coldly, and put it in the Pocket, as if doing this kind of thing is not surprising to me, let alone the first time.I was filled with indignation and became hard; that day I never stretched my eyebrows or opened my mouth until the night, and I paced up and down from time to time, with one hand tightly clutching the bag I kept in my pocket. Take the hot knife and prepare to do something terrible.These new sensations, which I had never had before, seized me so strongly and even pleased me that Zinaïda seldom occurred to me.I kept imagining Aleko and a young gypsy ① "Where are you going, handsome young man: lie down..." And then asked: You are covered in blood! ...ah, what have you done? ...

"Nothing!" I showed a cold smile, and said it again: nothing! My father was not at home, and my mother was almost always secretly angry from a certain time. She noticed that I was in trouble, and asked me during dinner: "Why are you so sullen, like a mouse stealing rice?" ?” I answered with a haughty sneer, and thought to myself, “What if they knew!? The clock had already struck eleven, and I went back to my room without undressing, and I waited Midnight came. At last the clock struck twelve. "It's time! ’ whispered the words through my teeth, and I buttoned them up to my collar, even rolled up my sleeves, and went out into the garden.

I had chosen in advance a place to wait: at the end of the garden, where the fence that separated our garden from that of the Tasekins met the two public walls, there was a solitary pine tree. .Standing under its low-hanging, dense branches, I could see clearly (without exceeding the visibility afforded by the darkness of night) everything that was going on around me.Here is a winding path, which has always seemed to me mysterious, running like a snake at the foot of the fence, on which traces of crawling can be seen; Tightly woven round pavilions.I walked up to the pine tree with great difficulty, leaned on its trunk and waited.

The night was still as quiet as the previous night, but the sky was less cloudy, and the outlines of the bushes, and even the flowers on high, were clearer.When I first started waiting, I felt bored and almost frightened.I was determined to risk everything.I just think about: how should I act?How about a yell, "Where are you going? Stop! Tell me what you want—or you'll die!" Or just stab... every sound, every rustle and rustle, I felt important and unusual... I prepared... I leaned forward... But half an hour passed, An hour passed, my blood flowed evenly, the heat dropped, and I began to realize the futility of all I was doing, and I even thought I was a little funny, Malevsky was kidding me of.I left my ambush and circled the whole garden.But there was no sound anywhere, as if trying to annoy me, everything was silent, even my dog ​​curled up in a ball by the wicket and fell asleep.I climbed to the top of the disused greenhouse and saw a large field in front of me. I remembered a meeting with Zinaida, and I fell into deep thought...

I was startled suddenly... I seemed to hear a creak... I heard a squeak... and there was a slight click of a branch being broken... I jumped two times and got out of the greenhouse. When I got down, I stood motionless on the ground.There was a clear sound of hurried and brisk, but cautious footsteps in the garden... The sound was getting closer and closer to me. "This is him...he's here at last!" The thought raced through my mind. Trembling, I took the knife out of my pocket, tremblingly opened it again, red sparks began to spin in front of my eyes, my hair stood on end with fear and anger... At this moment There was a sound of footsteps approaching me, I bent down, and walked forward slowly...a person appeared...Oh my God!This is my father!

I recognized him at once, though he was wrapped in a black cloak, with his hat pulled over his face, as he tiptoed past me.He didn't notice me, although there was nothing to cover me; but I was shaking so badly that I curled up into a ball, as if I was almost level with the ground.A jealous Othello who was ready to kill suddenly turned into a schoolboy... The sudden appearance of my father surprised me so much that I didn't even realize where he came from and where he was going at first.When the surroundings became quiet again, I straightened up and thought: "Why is father still walking in the garden in the middle of the night?" I dropped the knife on the grass in extreme fear.I feel so ashamed that I don't even want to look for it.I woke up immediately.But on my way home I went to the bench under the elder-bush and glanced at the little window of Zinaïda's bedroom.The small, slightly convex glass of the small window was a dull blue in the dim light cast from the night sky, and suddenly their color began to change... Behind the glass-this I can see It was very clear that the white curtain was lowered cautiously and gently, and it hung down to the window sill, just like that.

"What's going on here?" When I came to my room unknowingly, I almost couldn't help but said aloud. "Is it a dream, is it a coincidence, or..." Suddenly these conjectures and hypotheses emerged in my mind. They were so novel that I didn't even dare to think about it any more.