Chapter 121 Part Three - Seventeen

"Oh, what happened?" said Sekinina. "He's in love, really in love. Hey, Simonsson is like a child, and it's never expected to be in love like this. It's so strange, to be honest." , is too pathetic," she concluded with a sigh. "And what about Katyusha? What do you think she will do about it?" asked Nekhludoff. "Her?" Shekinina paused, apparently considering how to answer the question as appropriately as possible. "Her? You know, despite what she's been through before, she's a decent person... and considerate... She loves you, really loves you, and if she can do something nice for you, even On the negative side, she is very happy as long as you are no longer dragged down by her. Marriage to you will be a terrible depravity to her, more depraved than anything she has done before, so she Never agree. Besides, you make her feel uneasy by your presence."

"Then what is to be done? Should I leave here?" said Nekhludoff. Shekinina smiled innocently. "Yes, more or less it has to be done." "More or less, how can I more or less get out of here?" "I'm talking nonsense. However, I want to tell you about her. She probably saw the absurdity of his passionate love (he hadn't confessed it to her), so she was delighted and surprised. To tell you the truth Said, I am not good at such things, but I feel that his feelings, although more reserved, are not more than the feelings of men. He said that this kind of love made him spiritually noble, and he said it was Plato. But it seems to me that this kind of love, even if it is different, has a dirty foundation... as Novodvorov did to Grabetz."

As soon as Sekinina came to her beloved subject, she left it. "Then what should I do?" asked Nekhludoff. "I think you'll have to talk to her. It's always good to explain everything. You talk to her and I'll fetch her. Will you?" said Sekinina. "Then I will trouble you," said Nekhludoff.Shekinina went out. Nekhludoff stayed alone in his small cell, listening to Vera's light breathing, sometimes mixed with groans, and the continuous noise from the criminals who were separated by two doors, his heart surged. A strange feeling arose. What Simonsson had said to him relieved him of the responsibility he had voluntarily assumed, which was heavy and awkward at the time of his weak will, but at the moment he was not only in a bad mood, but even painful.He also had the feeling that Simonsson's proposal made his uniquely noble deed unrealizable, made his self-sacrifice less valuable both in his own eyes and in the eyes of others: since such a woman who had nothing to do with her Everyone is willing to share joys and sorrows with her, so his sacrifice seems insignificant.Perhaps there was also a common jealousy here, for he was so used to receiving her love for him that he could not tolerate her loving anyone else.Besides, that would have spoiled his plan to live with her while she was serving her sentence.If she married Simonson, there would be no need for him to stay here, and he would have to reconsider his life plans.Before he had time to reflect on his own feelings, the door opened suddenly, there was a louder uproar from the criminals (something unusual happened to them today), and Maslova walked in.

She walked quickly up to Nekhludoff. "Sekkinina sent me," said Maslova, stopping beside him. "Yes, I have something to say to you. Sit down, please. Simonson has spoken to me." Maslova sat down with her hands on her knees, very calm, but when Nekhludoff mentioned Simonson's name, she blushed. "What did he tell you?" she asked. "He told me he wanted to marry you." Maslova's face suddenly wrinkled, showing pain.She said nothing, just lowered her eyes. "He wants my permission, or what I think. I say it's all up to you, to decide."

"Oh, what's the matter? Why is it so?" she said, looking into Nekhludoff's eyes with that sideways look which always struck Nekhludoff so much.They stared at each other in silence for a few seconds.This gaze meant a lot to both parties. "This is a matter for you to decide," repeated Nekhludoff. "What can I decide?" said Maslova. "Everything has already been decided." "No, you must decide whether to accept Simonson's proposal," said Nekhludoff. "How can a convict like me be someone's wife? Why should I ruin Simonson?" She frowned.

"Well, what if there is an amnesty?" said Nekhludoff. "Well, leave me alone. I have nothing to say," she said, getting up and going out.