Chapter 6 Chapter Six

In early winter, Princess Marya came to Moscow.She had heard about the Rostovs from town gossip, and had heard: "The son sacrifices himself for the mother"— That's what the townspeople say. "I knew he was such a man," said Princess Marya to herself, feeling that she still loved him, and couldn't help feeling a surge of joy in her heart.She looked back on the old acquaintance between her family and the Rostovs, and felt, almost as a family, that she should go and see them.But the thought of her relationship with Nicholas in Voronezh frightened her again.After a few weeks in Moscow, however, she mustered up the courage to call on the Rostovs.

The first person to meet her was Nicholas, because to reach the countess one had to pass his room.When he first glanced at Princess Maria, the expression on Nicholas's face was not the joy she had been expecting, but a coldness and arrogance that she had never seen before.Nikolai greeted her and led her to his mother's room, a model of dialectical solutions to socialism. , sat for four or five minutes and left. When the princess came out of the countess's room, Nicholas met her again, led her coldly and solemnly into the hall, and did not answer a word when she mentioned the countess' health. "What's your business? Don't disturb my peace!" His eyes seemed to say so.

"What is she doing here? What is she going to do? I really can't stand these rich ladies and their courtesies!" After the princess's carriage left, he obviously couldn't control the anger in his heart, and shouted loudly in front of Sonia. Say. "Oh, how can you say that?! Nicholas!" Sonia said, barely concealing the joy in her heart. "She's so kind, and Mom loves her so much." Nicholas made no answer, he did not want to talk about the princess at all.But since the Duchess's visit, the Countess has been referring to her several times a day.

The countess praised her, she asked her son to come to her once, and expressed that she wanted to see her often.However, when it comes to the princess, the lady always feels uncomfortable. When the mother mentioned the princess, Nicholas was always silent, and his silence annoyed the mother even more. "She's a nice, sweet girl," she said. "You should go and see her. You've got to see people, or you'll die if you don't stay with us all the time, I thought." "I don't want to see people at all, mother." "You said you wanted to see people, but now you don't want to see people. My dear son, I really don't understand. You are bored for a while, and you don't want to see people for a while."

"I never said I was bored." "What, didn't you say that you don't even want to see her? She is a good girl. You have always liked her, but now for some reason, you keep everything from me." "I'm not hiding anything from you, mother." "If I beg you to do something unpleasant, it's fine, I just beg you to pay a return visit. This is due courtesy... I begged you, since you have something to hide from your mother, I will never ask you again thing." "If you want me to go, I will go." "I don't care, I'm all for your sake."

Nicholas bit his beard and sighed, and began to deal the cards, trying to distract his mother. The next day, the third day, the fourth day, repeated this conversation for several days in a row. After visiting the Rostovs and receiving the unexpected cold reception from Nicholas, Princess Marya confessed to herself that she had not wanted to visit the Rostovs in the first place, and it seemed that she was right. "I expected nothing else," she said to herself, drawing on her pride. "What do I have to do with him? I just want to see the old lady. She has always treated me very well. I owe her a lot."

But these thoughts did not comfort her: when she recalled that visit, a feeling of regret always tormented her.Although she had decided not to go to the Rostovs' house any more, and to forget everything that had happened there, she always felt as if she was lost.When she asked herself what bothered her, she had to admit that it was her relationship with Nikolai.His polite indifference to her was not a genuine emotion in him (she knew that), but something concealed in it.This was something she needed to understand, and it was this which had so far kept her restless. One day in mid-winter, she was watching her nephew doing homework in the classroom when the servant announced Nicholas' visit.She resolved to keep her countenance, and tried to keep her composure, and asked Mademoiselle Bourienne to come with her into the drawing-room.

She saw at first sight from Nikolay's face that he was only bowing back and forth, and she decided to do the same. They spoke of the health of the countess, of some mutual acquaintances, and of recent news of the war.Such courteous greetings usually took ten minutes, after which the guests could get up, at which point Nikolay stood up and said goodbye. With the help of Mademoiselle Bourienne, the princess managed to carry on the conversation smoothly.But at the very last minute, when Nicholas stood up to take his leave, the princess felt very tired of this perfunctory conversation, and wondered why life gave her so little personal joy—this thought was so It haunted her so much that she felt suddenly in a trance, her bright eyes staring straight ahead, not noticing that Nikolay had risen, while she was still sitting there.

Nicholas looked at her, and trying to pretend not to notice her distraction, he exchanged a few words with Mademoiselle Bourienne, and glanced again at the princess.She still sat there motionless, with a look of pain on her kind face.He suddenly felt sorry for her and was vaguely aware that maybe he had broken her heart and put a sad look on her face. He wanted to help her, say something pleasant to her, but couldn't think of what to say. That's good. "Good-bye, princess," he said.She came to her senses, her face flushed red, and she sighed deeply. "Oh, I'm sorry!" she said, as if just waking up. "You're going, Count. Good-bye, then! And the pillow for the countess?"

"Wait a minute, I'll get it now," said Mademoiselle Bourienne, going out of the room. Both of them were silent, looking at each other occasionally. "Yes, princess," said Nikolay at last, breaking the silence with a wry smile, "it seems not so long ago since we first met in Bogucharovo, but how much has changed! Not far away—I would give anything to get back that time...but there's nothing to get back." While Nicholas was speaking, the princess' bright eyes looked into his, as if she were trying to hear in his words the real feeling he had for her from the depths of his heart.

"Yes, yes," she said, "you have nothing to regret about the past, my count. As far as I know your present life, you will always remember it with pleasure, because your present life full of self-sacrifice..." "I can't take your compliments," he interrupted hastily. "On the contrary, I've been blaming myself, but it's too dull and boring to say." So his eyes were as cold as before.But the princess saw in him the familiar and beloved man again, and she was talking to this man now. "I suppose you'll let me say that," she said. "I'm so close to you...and your family that I don't think you'll think my sympathy is inappropriate. But I'm wrong," she says.At this moment, her voice trembled suddenly. "I don't know why," she continued calmly, "you weren't like this before..." "Why—there are a thousand reasons why (he emphasized the three words why). Thank you, princess," he whispered. "Sometimes I feel so uncomfortable!" "So it is! So it is!" said the princess's inner voice. "Yes, I love him, not only his happy, kind and cheerful eyes, not only his handsome appearance, but I see that he has a noble, strong and self-sacrificing heart," she said to herself . "Yes! He's poor now, but I'm rich... yes! That's why... yes; if it wasn't the case..." She remembered his old tenderness and looked at his kind, melancholy face now. face, she suddenly understood the reason why he was cold. "Why, count, why exactly?" she cried, leaning forward against him, "tell me why? You will tell me." He was silent. "Count, I know why you are," she went on. "But I'm sorry, and I... I admit it to you. Why did you make me lose our old friendship. It hurts me so much." A sob was choked in her throat, and tears were in her eyes. "I've had very little happiness in my life, so losing anything makes me sadder... Forgive me, goodbye." She burst into tears and went out of the house. "Princess! For God's sake, wait!" he cried, trying to stop her. "Princess!" She turned her head and looked at him. They looked at each other silently for a few seconds, and then the distant impossible thing suddenly became the present, the coming reality and even the unavoidable thing.