Chapter 5 chapter Five

I looked at the phone, couldn't help it, and picked it up again. Then put it down again. I really didn't have the courage to pick up the phone again. It was already two o'clock in the morning, and no one wanted to be disturbed at this time. "So what if I have money now? What if I have vacations?" I lit a cigarette, put it on the railing beside me, and looked at the sporadic night tourists in Yonghe Soymilk downstairs. long time. I have been alone, alone for a long time. Everything about Ziqing and me is contradictory in my heart, as if we were still a pair of close lovers yesterday, beautiful and warm.

The cigarette was burning, and I remembered that Ziqing once hated the smell of cigarettes on my body and asked me to quit smoking, but I always smiled and swayed. But after Ziqing turned around and left, I forgot when it started. My smoke was only breathing alone on the balcony railing. Everything is contradictory. The contradiction clearly connects the beautiful past with the gray present. "Go there," I said, flicking the butt of my cigarette into the sky. "Acknowledge your mistake." I said, the audio-controlled stereo in the car played an old song by a duo named Youke Lilin more than 30 years ago, I stepped on the accelerator, and the car slid out of the garage sensitively, heading towards Drive deep.

"I don't believe it, I gave up on you, just because of an unreasonable decision, thinking that this time I can bear you leaving me..." I hummed, and tears burst out of my fragile lacrimal glands. "I'm sorry, I'm so busy these days, you know I really can't leave you alone." I put down my coffee and took a drag on my cigarette. "It's okay, I can understand. Since you are so devoted to SONY's research and development work, it must be very attractive to you." Ziqing lowered her head, looking at the dimples on the coffee. "I'm sorry to you, the experiment has been stagnant recently, and I don't know when there will be a breakthrough, my pressure..." I stabbed the cigarette at the plastic flower hanging on the wall, and burned a black spot.

Ziqing raised her head slowly, the beauty at an elevation angle of 45 degrees made me unable to speak. "What do you want to say? There are some things I don't want to hear, and you don't want to say them either." Ziqing's voice was a little choked up: "If you don't say it, I can keep going." I was silent, stretched out my hand, and wiped away the fluctuating light in Ziqing's eyes. I looked at the pearl on my finger, and then at Ziqing. "I don't want to delay your youth, just because you are the most important baby in my life." My throat was dry, and my vision became uneven.

I squeezed Ziqing's hand tightly and said: "In the six years we have been together, everything is closely connected, but my life has fallen into endless experiments now, and it will be the same in the future, and you are glorious Your life should never be connected with such a gloomy life." Ziqing's hands were icy cold. My chest is oppressive, but I know that if I can't say it today, Ziqing's happiness will be ruined in the hands of a workaholic. "I love you, the person I love the most in my life is right in front of my eyes, but I still want to make a decision to break up with you, please... please forgive me." I said painfully.

Ziqing's tears froze the time and the temperature in the coffee shop. My trembling hands seemed to predict everything and the destruction. "Remember, don't drink too much Coke." Ziqing cried, and broke free from my hand. The snot dripped on the dizzy milk in the coffee, and the face was full of tears, saying: "Don't smoke, don't touch alcohol, Otherwise, you will become a big fat guy that no one wants." "I know." I nodded, watching the most sincere feelings in my life evaporate before my eyes. Just after Ziqing turned around. Everything evaporates.

without a trace. "Admit it, I've already admitted it a thousand times." I gripped the steering wheel and said to myself: "But fate is fair. I cut off my own soul with my own hands, and handed over the angelic girl to others. I ended up looking like a lost dog all day except for experiments. Shit! Lai Yanxiang, this is your end, from now on you will spend the rest of your life holding a lot of dollars! Shame on you!" The sports car slides into International Street. I closed the car door and looked at the Cinderella coffee shop standing in front of me. It was after two o'clock in the morning, and it still opened its doors, waving to couples who are in love, in secret love, or in love.

I'm burying everything in this fucking place, and I can't help but come here. Are you here to mourn? Come to confess? To torture yourself? No, I'm just here to breathe, the sadness that Ziqing left behind three years ago. Three years ago, she was willing to cry for me because I deserved her heartbreak. This feeling is still in my blood, and this feeling is still hidden in the seat between us. When she still pays attention to me, it is the brightest time in my life. I must come and breathe. I pushed open the door of the Cinderella Café. My heart is cold.