Chapter 17 Chapter 12 1

Just as I was schmoozing with old Troy from the Metropolitan Police around the corner in Arbor Hill, damn it, a chimney-sweep bastard came up and nearly stuck his stuff in my eye.I turned around, and was about to give him a bad word, when it was none other than Joe Hines stalking up Stoney Battle Street. "Hey, Joe," I said, "how are you doing? Did you see that chimney-sweep nearly poke the ball out of my eye with his brush?" "Soot's an auspicious thing," said Joe. "Who's that old fool you were talking to?" "Old Troy," I said, "was in the Army. I ain't made up my mind whether or not I'm going to sue him when that guy obstructed traffic with a broom and a ladder or something."

"What are you doing around here?" said Joe. "Nothing," I said, "beyond the Garrison Church, and round the corner of Chick Alley, there's a goddam cunning thief—old Troy just let me know something about him. had a farm in the county, and extorted a great deal of tea and sugar from a dwarf named Moses Herzog who lived near Hatersbury Street. It was decided that he should pay three shillings a week." "The circumcised guy?" said Joe. "Yes," said I, "cut off a bit of the point. [3] An old plumber named Gerrardy. I've been with him for a fortnight, and he won't give a penny."

"Is that what you do now?" said Joe. "Alas," I said, "the heroes are down![4] Living off of collecting bad debts and bad debts. But you can't easily walk all day with a goddam bastard as notorious as he is. His pockmarked face could hold a shower.' Tell him,' he said, 'I'm not afraid of him,' he said, 'even if he sends you again, I'm not afraid at all. If he Pai,' he said, 'I'll have him arraigned in court. I'm going to sue him for operating without a licence.' I couldn't stop laughing. 'He drank my tea. He ate my candy. Because he won't pay me back what he owes me! Will he?'

Purchased from Merchant Moses Herzog (hereinafter referred to as the Vendor), 13 St Kevin's Walk, Wood Quay, Dublin, and sold to Gentleman Michael, 29 Arbor Slope, Allen Dock, Dublin The durable commodity of E. Gerrardy[5] (hereafter referred to as the buyer), consisting of a constant balance of three shillings a pound of fine tea, a constant balance of five pounds, a constant balance of threepence a pound of crystallized granulated sugar, a constant balance of threestones[6 ].As consideration, the above-mentioned buyer shall pay the above-mentioned seller one pound five shillings and sixpence.This sum shall be paid in weekly installments of three shillings every seven days.The above-mentioned seller and its legal successors, business successors, trustees and assignees are one party, and the buyer and its legal successors, business successors, trustees and assignees are the other party; The above-mentioned buyer shall not pawn, mortgage, sell or otherwise transfer the above-mentioned durable goods until the payment method is paid to the seller on time.The said seller still has the exclusive right to these goods and can only dispose of them in his good faith and will.

"Are you a strict teetotaler?" asked Joe. "Not a drop between drinks," I said. "How about paying homage to our friend?" said Jo. "Who's that?" I said, "he's gone mad, in John of God, poor man." "Drinking his own kind of bar?" said Joe. "Well," I said, "whiskey and edema." "Come on to Barney Kiernan's," said Joe, "I want to see the Citizens." "Just at Barney's, old acquaintance," I said. "Anything new or great, Joe?" "Not at all," said Joe. "I just got off that meeting at the Emblem Hotel."

"What will it be?" I said. "The meeting of the cattle dealers," said Joe, "about the foot-and-mouth problem. I'm going to give the 'citizens' a tip on that." So we gossiped and walked along the linen hall barracks[12]) and behind the courthouse.Joe was a generous man when he was rich, but he never had any money, as he looked like.God, I can't forgive that bastard who robs in broad daylight, goddam crafty Geraghty.He even said that he wanted to sue others for operating without a license. There is a land in fair Innisfail[13], the holy land of Maichan[14].There stands a watchtower [15] high up there, which can be seen from a distance.Inside lay the most outstanding dead—soldiers and nobles of the first generation.They slept as if they were alive. [16] It was a merry land indeed, with gurgling brooks and rivers full of playful fish: greenfin, flounder, grouper, chrysalis, male blackfin[17], chub, flounder , flounder, flounder, sckock, chrysalis, and other innumerable fish of the water world.Towering trees sway their graceful leaves in all directions in light westerly and easterly winds, fragrant banyans, Lebanon fir, towering sycamores, sycamores, and other jewels of the arboreal world that flourish throughout the region. .Lovely girls clung to the roots of lovely trees, and sang the loveliest songs, and played with all kinds of lovelies, gold ingots, whitebaits, buckets of herring, nets of eels, and cod , baskets of salmon, purple treasures in the sea and naughty insects.From Ebrana to Slieve Magee[18] Heroes from far and wide sailed across the oceans to woo them.Peerless Princes from Munster the Free, Connaught the Righteous, Leinster the Sleek, the Land of Kruachon, Armagh the Splendor, the Sublime Land of the Boyle.They are princes, the sons of kings[20].

There also stands a splendid palace[21].Its gleaming crystal roof caught the eyes of sailors.They crossed the vast ocean in a specially-made three-masted sailboat, and brought all the local livestock, fat poultry and first-picked fruits.Tax them by O'Connell Fitzmont[22].He was a patriarch -- and a descendant of a patriarch.The bountiful harvest of the fields was brought in huge open wagons: shallow baskets of broccoli, cartloads of spinach, huge pineapples, Rangoon beans[23], how many Stryker[24] tomatoes , figs in drums, Swedish turnips in a row, spherical potatoes, bundles of Yorkie and Savoy iridescent kale, and pearls of the earth in shallow boxes [ 25] --Scallions; in addition, there are mushrooms in a slender basket, milk-yellow edible gourds, plump scallops, barley and moss, red, green, yellow, and brown rotten leaves are sweet, big, bitter, and ripe There are speckled apples, red bayberries in thin wooden boxes, thick baskets of gooseberries.Juicy and fluffy on the skin, then there are strawberries and freshly picked raspberries for princes.

I'm not afraid of him, said the fellow, not at all.Get out, Geralty, you notorious bastard bandit, bandit of the valley! In this way, countless herds of livestock walked along this road.There were belled rams, excited ewes, shorn rams without eunuchs, lambs, stubbled geese[26], half-sized table steers, wheezing mares, sawed Horned calves, long-haired sheep, sheep fattened for sale, kraft[27] the best cows about to calve, substandard cattle and sheep, spayed sows, bacon Barred boars, fine pigs of all different breeds, Angus ewes, purebred dehorned steers without spotting, and first-class dairy and beef cattle in their prime; from Lasker, Rush and Carrick The meadows of Mearns, from the flowing valleys of Tormund, from the immeasurable hills of McGillicady, and the majestic and unfathomable Shannon, On the gentle slopes of the tribe, the trampling, clucking, roaring, mooing, bleating, panting, grunting, grinding, and chewing sounds of flocks of sheep, pigs, and cows with heavy hoofs can be heard incessantly.Udders are almost swollen, the excess milk, barrels of butter, cheese in a pair of lining[30], small farmhouse barrels[31] filled with pieces of lamb neck breast Meat, wheat from Cranock[32], and hundreds of oval-shaped eggs of different sizes, or agate color, or burnt brown, just came in a steady stream.

So we turned around and walked into Barney Kiernan's.Sure enough, the "citizen" guy was sitting in the corner, muttering to himself and joking with that mangy mongrel, Gary Owen, and waiting for some wine to drop from the sky. "There he is," I said, "in his hole of glory, with a full little jar[34] and a pile of newspapers, working for the cause." The sound of that goddam mongrel barking gives goosebumps.If anyone would kill it, it would be a carnal act[35].It is true that when the gendarmes in Santre[36] went to deliver the blue papers[37] it bit off a chunk of his trousers

"Stop and hand it over," he said. "That's all right, 'Citizen,'" said Joe, "here's our own people." "Go on, your own people," he said. Then he rubbed one eye with his hand and said: "What do you think of the current situation?" He considers himself a strongman[39] and Rory of the Mountain[40].But Joe really can handle it. "I think the market is bullish," he said, sliding a hand up his hip. So the fellow Citizen slapped his knees and said: "It's all caused by foreign wars[41]." Joe stuck his thumb in his pocket and said:

"It's the Russians who want to dominate." "Nonsense! Don't talk nonsense, Jo," said I; "my throat is so dry that a half-crown of it won't quench my thirst." "You order, Citizen," said Joe. "National wine [43] chant," he said. "What would you like?" said Joe. "Same as Macanasbe," I said. "Have three pints, Terry," said Joe. "How about you, old darling, Citizen?" he said. "It couldn't be better, my friend," he said. "What, Gary? Can we get it, eh?" As he spoke, he grabbed the big, annoying dog by the scruff of the neck.God, almost strangled it. The man sitting on the big boulder at the foot of the round turret has broad shoulders and thick chest, strong limbs, frank eyes, red hair, freckles, unshaven beard, wide mouth and big nose, long head, deep voice, bare knees, physical strength Extraordinary, with hairy legs, ruddy complexion, well-developed arms, and a heroic look.The width between the shoulders is several el[46].His rocky, mountainous knees, like the rest of his naked body, were covered with tawny, matted hair.It resembles the gorse (Ulex Euripios[47]) both in color and in its toughness.The broad nostrils of the nostrils are covered with bristles of the same tawny color, and are as big as a cave, allowing meadowlarks to build their nests in the dark. The eyes[48], in which tears and smiles are constantly competing for priority, are as big as a large cauliflower.From the deep socket of his mouth, at regular intervals, he exhaled a strong and warm breath; and his strong heart was always beating loudly, powerfully and robustly, resonating rhythmically, thundering like thunder. Rumbling, shaking the ground, the tower tops, and the walls of higher caverns. He wore a waistcoat of freshly flayed bull hide, reaching to the knees, and a loose kilt with pleated kilts.Around the waist is a belt woven of straw and rushes.Underneath were buckskin leggings scribbled with gut.Leggings of Highland Balbriggin[49] leather dyed moss-purple, and low-heeled openwork leather shoes made of salted cowhide tied with the windpipe of the same animal bring.A string of sea pebbles hangs from his belt.Every time his terrible body moved, it jingled.On these pebbles are engraved with rough and masterly the images of many heroes and heroines of the ancient Irish tribes: Cuchulin, Conn the battle-hardened, Nel the nine-time hostage[50], King Carat's Brian[51], Malachi the Great, Art McMurra, Shane O'Neill[52], Father John Murphy, Owen Rowe[53], Patrick Sarsfield[54], Red Hugh O'Donnell, Redhead Jim McDermott[55], Saugarth Ughan O'Groni[56], Michael Dwyer, Francis Higgins[57], Henry Joy Mokraken[58], Goliath[59], Horace Whitley[60], Thomas Conneff, Peg Wuffington[61], Country Blacksmith[62] ], Captain Moonlight[63], Captain Boycott[64], Dante Alighieri, Christopher Columbus, St. Forsa[65], St. Brendan[66], McMahon[67] Marshal, Charlemagne[68], Theobald Wolfe Tone[69], Mother of the Maccabees[70], The Last of the Mohicans[71], The Rose of Castile [72], The man who conquered Galway[73], The man who bankrupted the casino owner in Monte Carlo[74], The gatekeeper[75], The woman who didn't do it[76], Benjamin Franklin, Napoleon Bo Nabal, John Law Sullivan[77], Cleopatra, My Faithful Darling[78], Julius Caesar, Paracelsus[79], Thomas Leigh Lord Putton[80], William Tell[81], Michelangelo Hayes[82], Mohammed, The Bride of Lammermoor[83], Peter the Hermit[84], Peter the Packer[85] ], Rosalyn the Brunette[86], Patrick W. Shakespeare[87], Brian Confucius[88], Murtach Gutenberg[89], Patricio Velázquez [90], Captain Nemo[91], Tristan and Yeeser[92], the First Prince of Wales[93], Thomas Cook and Son[94], Brave Boy Soldier[95], The Kisser [96], Dick Turpin[97], Ludwig Beethoven, The Blonde Girl[98], Healy the Swinger[99], Angus the Servant[100], Dolly Hill, Sid Neighborhood Trail, Howth Mountain[101], Valentine Great Rex[102], Adam and Eve[103], Arthur Wellesley[104], Leader Crocker[105], Heath Rhododendron[106] , Jack the Giant Slayer[107] , Gautama Buddha[108] , Lady Godiva[109] , Lily of Killarney[110] , Evil Eye Balor[111] , Queen of Sheba[112] , Archie Nagel[113] , Joe Nagel[114] , Alessandro Volta[115] , Jeremiah O'Donovan Rowe Sa[116], Don PhilipO'Sullivan Beal[117].Beside him lay a spear of sharpened granite, and at his feet lay a beast of the canine kind.It was panting like a snoring, indicating that it had fallen into a restless sleep.This is evidenced by its hoarse howl and convulsive movements.From time to time the master struck it with a large stick roughly made of Paleolithic stone, in order to calm and restrain it. So Terry finally brought in Joe's three pints.My fellow, when I saw him strike a gold pound, I nearly went blind.Ah, really, what a dainty pound piece. "What else is there," he said. "You snatched it from the charity box, Joe," I said. "It's the sweat of my brow," said Joe, "that the prudent fellow gave me the information."[118] "Before I met you, I saw him," I said, "hanging down Peel Lane and Greek Street. His big cod eyes went through every gut." Who is clad in black armor, who has come through the land of Maichang[119]?It was Oblum, son of Rory[122].It was him.Rory's son is fearless.He is a cautious man. "Working for the old crone in Prince Street," said the Citizen, "for the subsidized organ. Binded for taking an oath in Parliament. Look at the damned shit," He said, "Look at this," he said, "Irish Independent, how strange it is for you to see that it is 'Founded by Parnell, Workers' Friend'. Listen to this All for Ireland Irish Birth notices and obituaries in the Independent, I have to thank you. And wedding announcements." He began to read: "'Exeter City'[122] Gordon of Barnfield Crescent; Redmayne of Avery, St Anne's-super-Sea, William T.Redmayne's wife had a son. 'how is this? 'Wright and Flint; Vincent and Gillette, Rosa Marion, daughter of Rosa and the late George Alfred Gillette, Stockville[123] Clay 179 Palm Road, Plainwood and Ridsdale, married at St. Jude's, Kensington, officiated by the very Reverend Dr. Forrester, Vicar of Worcester. 'Uh?Obituary: 'Bristol, Whitehall Lane, London; Carl, Stoke Newington[124] with gastritis and heart disease; Mott Hall, Chepstow[125] Cockburn...'" "I know that fellow," said Joe, "had a hard time with him." "'Cockburn Dimusay, wife of the late Admiral David Dimusay; Miller, of Tottenham, aged eighty-five; of 35 Canning Street, Liverpool Isabella Helen Wales died June 12th. 'How can a national newspaper print such a fake thing, er, my brown boy[126]? Bantry, the self-serving Martin Murphy[127], what kind of tricks are you doing?" "Ah, oh," said Jo, passing the drink, "thank God they're ahead of us. Drink, Citizen." "Yes," he said, "my lord." "Good health to you, Jo," I said, "and good health to all of you." what!Oh!Stop chatting!I just think about drinking a pint so moldy, I swear to God I can hear the wine ticking on my stomach. Look, when they drank the wine happily, the god-like messenger came in a blink of an eye.This is a handsome young man, as bright as the sun, followed by a graceful and elegant elder.He held the holy volume of law enforcement, accompanied by his wife of incomparably noble family, a leader among women. Little Alf Bergen came in and hid in Barney's cubicle, laughing like hell.It was none other than Bob Dolan, very drunk, sitting snoring in a corner I didn't see.I don't know what's going on.Alf kept pointing out the door.Dude, it's that damn old buffoon Dennis Breen.He was pulling on the slippers he wore in the shower, with two damn big books under his arm.His wife--a wretched wretch--had trotted after her like a poodle.I'm afraid Alf will burst out laughing. "Look at him," he said, "Brin. Somebody sent him a postcard saying 'It's all over.' So he's walking around Dublin trying to get up..." Then he bent over laughing. "What?" I said. "Sue, sue him for libel," said he, "for ten thousand pounds." "Nonsense!" I said. The damned mongrel snarled hideously when he realized what was going on, but Citizen only kicked him in the ribs. "Shut up!"[129] he said. "Who's that?" said Joe. "Brin," said Alf, "he was at John Henry Menton's first, and then he went round to Corris-Ward's. Then Tom Rochford met him, and jokingly ordered him to Go to the Deputy Sheriff. Oh, God, it hurts my stomach from laughing. It's over: it's over. The tall guy gave him a look like he's summoning him, and now that old madman is going to Greene Street Get the police." "When the hell did Long John hang that guy in Mountjoy?"[130] Joe said. "Bergen," said Bob Dolan, waking up, "is that Alf Bergen?" "Yeah," said Alf. "Hanged? We'll see. Terry, get us a shot. That damned old fool! Ten thousand pounds. You should look into Long John's eyes." It's all over..." So he laughed. "Who are you laughing at?" Bob Dolan said. "Is it Bergen?" "Come on, Terry [131] man," said Alf. When Terrence O'Rion heard this, he immediately brought a transparent glass full of bubbling Udon beer.It was brewed in their holy vats by the noble twins Bangjivi and Bangka Genlang[132].As shrewd as the two sons of the immortal Leda [133], they hoarded a great deal of the juicy berries of the hop, [134] and heaped, sorted, ground, brewed, and mixed with sour juice, Place the freshly brewed juice over the holy fire.This shrewd pair of brethren are the kings of the cask, working day and night. Then you, valiant Terrence, according to the familiar custom[135], serve him sweet drink in transparent cups, and serve him to the thirsty, gallant and divinely beautiful. Yet he, O'Bergan's young patriarch, was not to be outdone in generosity, and graciously paid for the most expensive bronze city with a head cast on it.[136]On it, embossed in elaborate metalwork, is the imposing portrait of the Queen, a descendant of the Brunwick family,[137] and named Victoria.By the grace of God, Your Majesty the Worker is sovereign over the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Ireland and the British Overseas Territories.She is the Queen, Defender of the Faith, Empress of India.It was she who conquered the nations, and was adored by all, known and loved by the pale, the brunette, the reddish, and the swarthy, from the land from sunrise to sunset[138]. "What the hell is that bloody Mason doing," said Citizen, "slinking around outside?" "What's the matter?" said Joe. "Here," said Alf, tossing the money, "speaking of hangings, I'll show you something you've never seen: a letter from the hangman's own hand. Look." So he took out of his pocket a stack of letters in envelopes. "Are you kidding me?" I said. "The real thing," said Alf, "read it." So Joe picked up the letters. "Who are you laughing at?" Bob Dolan said. I see the beginning of a little trouble.This guy Bob loses his composure when he drinks.So, I found something to say: "How's Willie Murray, Alf?" "Don't know," said Alf, "I saw him with Paddy Dignam on Capel Street just now. But I was chasing that..." "You what?" said Jo, dropping the letters. "With whom?" "Talk to Dignam," Alf said. "You mean Paddy?" said Joe. "Yeah," said Alf, "what's the matter?" "Don't you know he's dead?" said Joe. "Paddy Dignam is dead!" said Alf. "No," said Joe. "I did see him not five minutes ago," said Alf, "as sure as the butt of a gun."[140] "Who's dead?" Bob Dolan said. "Then it's his ghost you saw," said Jo. "God, save us from misfortune." "What?" said Alf. "It's really only five... oh?... And there's Willie Murray with him, the two of them in that shop called... What? Dignam do you died?" "What's the matter with Dignam?" said Bob Dolan. "What are you talking about...?" "Dead!" said Alf. "He's as happy as you are." "Perhaps so," said Joe, "they've taken it upon themselves to bury him this morning anyway."[141] Paddy? said Alf. "Yes," said Joe, "he's at the end of his life, God have mercy on him." "Merciful Christ!" said Alf. He was indeed so-called scared out of his wits. In the dark, one feels the hands of ghosts shaking.When the prayer according to the Tantric mantra[142] was sent to the place where it should be received, a faint but brighter ruby ​​luster gradually came into view.The gigawatt light emanating from the top of the head and face makes the ethereal body extraordinarily lifelike. [143] Communication is facilitated by orange and bright red rays emitted by the pituitary gland and by the sacrum and solar plexus.Asked his name in life and where he is now in the heavens, he answered that he is now at the end of the kalpa[144] or on his way back, but is still suffering in the lower astral realms, at the hands of some bloodthirsty ones.When asked what was his initial feeling when he crossed the vast realm, he replied: What he saw at first was like a blurred image reflected in a mirror[145], but the development was immediately revealed in front of those who had crossed the border. I”[146] this supreme possibility.When asked if life in this world was similar to what we experience in this world in our physical bodies, he replied that favored ones who had entered the spirit world had told him that they lived in homes with all the amenities of a modern household , such as Taravana, Aravatar, Hart Akelda, Watercrasat [147].Adepts of incomparable seniority are immersed in waves of the purest pleasure.He wanted a quart of skim milk and it was brought to him at once, and he obviously quenched his thirst.Asked if he had any message for the living, he exhorted all those who were still in Maya[148]: Be enlightened, because it was rumored in the heavens that Mars[149] and Jupiter[150] had descended to the Come and make trouble in the corner, and that is the sphere of influence of Aries[151].At this time, I asked if the old man had any special wishes in this regard, and the answer was: "Everyone who is still living in the physical body, I would like to pay my respects to you. Don't allow Ke Kai to make huge profits." It is reported that, This refers to Cornelius[152] Kelleher.He was a personal friend of the deceased and a well-known H.J.Manager of O'Neill's funeral home, he handles funerals.Before taking his leave he asked to tell his dear son Pazzi that the boot that Pazzi was looking for was present under the chest of drawers in the side room.The heels of these boots are quite strong, and they just need to be taken to Karen's for mending.He said that in the next life, he would always think about this matter, and his mind would be extremely disturbed.Be sure to pass it on. He was assured that they would do so, and he made it clear that he was satisfied. He left the world.O Dignam, our rising sun.His steps are so quick on the bracken.Glittering forehead Patrick.Bumba[154], lament with your wind.Ocean, lament with your whirlwind. "He's gone there again," said the Citizen, staring outside. "Who?" I said. "Bloom," he said, "he's been walking around like a cop on duty for ten minutes." Yes, I saw him stick in his face for a moment, then sneak away again. Little Alf was so frightened that he couldn't straighten up, it was true. "Merciful Christ! I swear it was he." Bob Dolan - When drunk, he degenerates into the nastiest gangster in all of Dublin.He put the hat on the back of his head and said: "Who said Christ was merciful?" "I beg your pardon," Alf said. "What a merciful Christ! Didn't he take poor little Willie Dignam?" "Oh, well," said Alf, trying to evade it, "he won't have to worry about it any more now." Yet Bob Dolan rants: "I said he was a cruel villain who took poor little Willie Dignam." Terry came up and gave him a wink to keep him quiet, and said it was a respectable licensed liquor store and please don't talk about that.So Bob Dolan mourned the Paddy Dignam, and wept really. "There's no such good-looking man ever," he said, twitching. "The nicest, most innocent man." "Damn tears are coming to my eyes.[155] He's talking that damn big talk. Might as well go home and find that little somnambulist whore he married. Mooney, daughter of a little executor. [156] Her mother kept a whore house in Hardwick Street, and she hung out on the landings. Bantam Lyons, who lived with her, told me that it was two o'clock in the morning and she was still naked, all The son stayed there naked, and treated everyone equally. "The most decent and proper man is gone," said he. "Poor little Willie, poor little Paddy Dignam!" So, full of grief, he wept with a heavy heart for the extinguishment of that ray of heavenly light. The old dog Gary Owen barked again at Bloom, who was watching at the door. "Come in, come in," said the Citizen, "it won't eat you." Bloom, keeping his cod eyes on the dog, sidled in and asked Terry if Martin Cunningham was there. "Oh, dear, Macchio," said Joe, who was reading one of the letters, "listen to me?" He began to read a letter. 7 Hunter Street Liverpool City of Dublin, Dublin Sheriff's Office: Dear Sirs, I have voluntarily served in the execution of the above-mentioned capital punishment.one nine hundred I hanged Joe Gunn at Bootle Jail on February 12th, 158. I have also been hanged... "Show us, Joe," I said. ...Soldier Arthur Chase, the murderer of Jesse Tilchter.he is Hanged in Pentonville Jail.I was also an assistant... "My God," I said. ...on that occasion, Billington[159] sent the vicious murderer S[160] hanged... The "citizens" wanted to get the letter back. "Wait a minute," said Joe. I have a trick: Once the noose is put on, he can't break free.Such as It is a great honor to be hired by your esteemed Excellency.I ask for five guineas. H. Rumbold[161] pause senior barber "He's still a fierce, brutal savage," said the Citizen. "Besides, the bastard writes like shit," said Joe. "Here," he said, "take it away, Alf, I don't want to see it. Say, Bloom," he said, "you drink What?" So they argued about it.Bloom said he didn't want to drink and couldn't drink, excuse me, don't take offense.Then he added, "Then ask for a cigar."Well, he's a prudent member, that's not ambiguous at all. "Give us one of the strongest flavors you have in your shop, Terry," said Joe. That's when Alf told us that a guy gave us a black-framed mourning card. "Those fellows are barbers," he said, "from the Black Country. They'll hang their own fathers for five quid, and pay for the journey." He also told us that after the prisoner was suspended in the air, the two people waiting below pulled his heels to make him die completely.Then they cut the noose into pieces, and sold the skulls for shillings apiece. [164] These fierce, sword-wielding knights live in the Black Country.They cling to that deadly rope.Yes, whoever kills must be caught and sent to Erebus[165].For the Lord has said that I cannot forgive such crimes in any way. So, everyone started talking about the death penalty.Naturally, Bloom also chatted about the ins and outs of the death penalty and all kinds of nonsense.The old dog kept sniffing at him.I've heard that these jews always have a strange smell that attracts the dogs around them and subdues what else. "But there's one thing it can't conquer," said Alf. "What object?" said Joe. "It's the penis of the poor wretch who was hanged," said Alf. "Is it?" said Joe. "It's true," said Alf, "I heard it from the warden at Kilmenham. That's what happened after they hanged Joe Brady of 'The Ever Victorious'. He told me that when they cut the noose to bring down the hanged man, the penis stuck in their face like a poker." "The dominant feeling is strong to death," said Joe, "as someone[167] said." "It can be explained scientifically," said Bloom, "but it's a natural phenomenon, isn't it, because because of..." So he talked about its phenomenon and science in a word-like manner, this phenomenon and that phenomenon and so on. The eminent scientist, Mr. Luitpold Blumendaft,[168] has put forth the following medical grounds for illustration: According to the accepted traditions of medicine, the fragmentation of the cervical vertebrae and the concomitant amputation of the spinal cord , will inevitably give a strong stimulus to the nerve center of the human body, which will cause the rapid expansion of the elastic pores of the cavernous body, and prompt the blood to inject instantaneously into this part called the penis, that is, the male genitalia in human anatomy.其结果是：在颈骨断袭导致死亡的那一瞬间[169] ，诱发出专家称之为“生殖器病态地向前上方多产性勃起”这一现象。 [170] “市民”当然急不可耐地等着插嘴的机会。 接着就高谈阔论起“常胜军”啦，激进分子[171] 啦，六七年那帮人[172] 啦，还有那些怕谈到九八年[173]的人什么的。乔也跟他扯起那些为了事业经临时军事法庭审判而被绞死、开膛或流放的人们，以及新爱尔兰，新这个，新那个什么的。说起新爱尔兰，这家伙倒应该去物色一条新狗，可不是嘛。眼下这条畜生浑身长满癞疮，饥肠辘辘，到处嗅来嗅去，打喷嚏，又搔它那疮痂。接着，这狗就转悠到正请阿尔夫喝半品脱酒的鲍勃·多兰跟前，向他讨点儿什么吃的。于是，鲍勃·多兰当然就干起缺德的傻事儿来了。 “伸爪子！伸爪子，狗儿！乖乖老狗儿！伸过爪子来！伸爪子让咱捏捏！” absurd! [ 174] 也甭去捏该死的什么爪子了，他差点儿从该死的凳子上倒栽葱跌到该死的老狗脑袋上。阿尔夫试图扶住他。他嘴里还喋喋不休他说着种种蠢话，什么训练得靠慈爱之心啦，纯种狗啦，聪明的狗啦。该死的真使你感到厌恶。然后他又从叫特里拿来的印着雅各布商标的罐头底儿上掏出几块陈旧碎饼干。狗把它当作旧靴子那样嘎吱嘎吱吞了下去，舌头耷拉出一码长，还想吃。这条饥饿的该死的杂种狗，几乎连罐头都吞下去嘞。 且说“市民”和布卢姆正围绕刚才那个问题争论着呢：被处死于阿伯山的希尔斯弟兄[175] 和沃尔夫·托恩[176] 啦。罗伯特·埃米特[177]为国捐躯啦，汤米·穆尔关于萨拉·柯伦的笔触--她远离故土[178] 啦。满脸脂肪的布卢姆当然装腔作势地叼着一支浓烈得使人昏迷的雪茄。现象！他娶的那位胖墩儿才是个稀奇透顶的老现象哩：她的后背足有滚木球的球道那么宽。精明鬼伯克告诉我，有一阵子这对夫妻住在市徽饭店，里面有位老太婆[179]，带着个疯疯傻傻、令人丢脸[180] 的侄子。布卢姆指望她在遗嘱里赠给自己点儿什么，就试图使她的心肠软下来。于是，就对她百般奉承，和颜悦色地陪她玩比齐克[181]牌戏。老太婆总是做出一副虔诚的样子，每逢星期五，布卢姆也跟着不吃肉，还带那个蠢才去散步。有一回他领着这个侄子满都柏林转悠。凭着神圣的乡巴佬发誓，布卢姆连一句也没唠叨，直到那家伙醉得像一只炖熟的猫头鹰，这才把他带回来。他说他这么做是为了教给那个侄子酗酒的害处。那个老太婆、布卢姆的老婆和旅店老板娘奥多德太太这三位妇人居然没差点儿把他整个儿烤了，也够不寻常的了。天哪，精明鬼勃克学他们争辩的样儿给我看，我不得不笑。布卢姆说着他那些口头禅，什么“你们不明白吗？要么就是“然而，另一方面”。不瞒您说，我刚刚谈到的那个蠢才从此就成了科普街鲍尔鸡尾酒店的常客：每星期五次，必把那家该死的店里的每一种酒都喝个遍，腰腿瘫软得动弹不了，只好雇马车回去。真是个现象！ “为了纪念死者[182] ，”“市民”举起他那一品脱装的玻璃杯，瞪着布卢姆说。 “好的，好的，”乔说。 “你没抓住我话中的要点，”布卢姆说，“我的意思是……” “我们自己！”[183]“市民”说，“我们自己就够了！[184] 我们所爱的朋友站在我们这边，我们所憎恨的仇敌在我们对面。[ 185]” 最后的诀别[186]令人感动之至。丧钟从远远近近的钟楼里不停地响着，教堂幽暗的院子周围，一百面声音闷哑的大鼓发出不祥的警告，不时地被大炮那瓮声瓮气的轰鸣所打断。震耳欲聋的雷鸣和映出骇人景象的耀眼闪电，证明天公的炮火给这本来就已令人毛骨悚然的景色，平添了超自然的威势。瀑布般的大雨从愤怒的苍穹的水门倾泻到聚集在那里的据估计起码也不下五十万大众那未戴帽子的光头上。都柏林市警察署武装队在警察署长的亲自指挥下，在庞大的人群中维持着治安。约克街的铜管乐队和簧管乐队用缠了黑纱的乐器出色地演奏出我们从摇篮里就爱上的那支由于斯佩兰扎的哀戚歌词[187]而最为动人的曲调。这样，使群众得以消磨一下大会开始前的这段时间。为了供临时浩浩荡荡赶来参加的那些乡亲们舒适地享用，还准备了特快游览列车和敞篷软座公共马车。都柏林的街头红歌手利×翰和穆×根[188]，像往常那样用诙谐逗乐的腔调唱《拉里被处绞刑的前夕》[189] 。我们这两位无与伦比的小丑在热爱喜剧要素的观众当中兜售刊有歌词的大幅印张，销路极佳。凡是在心灵深处懂得欣赏毫不粗俗的爱尔兰幽默的人，绝不会在乎把自己辛辛苦苦地挣来的几便士掏给他们。男女弃儿医院的娃娃们也挤满一个个窗口俯瞰这一情景，对于出乎意料地添加到今天的游艺中的这一余兴感到欢快。济贫小姊妹会的修女们想出个高明主意：让这些没爹没妈的可怜的娃娃们享受到一次真正富于教育意义的娱乐，值得称赞。来自总督府家宴的宾客包括许多社交界知名淑女，她们在总督伉俪的陪同下，在正面看台的特等席上落座。坐在对面看台上的是衣着鲜艳的外国代表团。通称作绿宝石岛[190]之友。全体出席的代表团包括骑士团司令官巴奇巴奇·贝尼诺贝诺内[ 191] （这位代表团团长[192] 因半身不遂，只得借助于蒸汽起重机坐下来），皮埃尔保罗·佩蒂特埃珀坦先生[193] ，杰出的滑稽家乌拉基米尔·波克特汉克切夫[194] ，大滑稽家莱奥波尔德·鲁道尔夫·封·施万岑巴德- 赫登塔勒[195] ，玛尔哈·维拉佳·吉萨斯左尼·普特拉佩斯蒂[196]伯爵夫人、海勒姆·Y。邦布斯特、阿塔纳托斯·卡拉梅勒洛斯伯爵[197] 、阿里巴巴·贝克西西·拉哈特·洛库姆·埃芬迪[198] ，伊达尔戈·卡瓦列罗·堂·佩卡迪洛·伊·帕拉布拉斯·伊·帕特诺斯特·德·拉·马洛拉·德·拉·马拉利亚先生[199] ，赫克波克·哈拉基利[200] ，席鸿章[ 201] 、奥拉夫·克贝尔克德尔森[202] ，特里克·范·特龙普斯先生，[203]，潘·波尔阿克斯·帕迪利斯基[204] ，古斯庞德·普鲁库鲁斯托尔·克拉特奇纳布利奇兹伊奇[205] ，勃鲁斯·胡平柯夫[206] ，赫尔豪斯迪莱克托尔普莱西登特·汉斯·丘赤里- 斯托伊尔里先生[207] ，国立体育馆博物馆疗养所及悬肌普通无薪俸讲师通史专家教授博士、里格弗里德·于贝尔阿尔杰曼[208] 。所有的代表对他们被请来目睹的难以名状的野蛮行径，都毫无例外地竭力使用最强烈的各自迥异的言词发表了意见。 于是，关于爱尔兰的主保圣人[209] 的诞辰究竟是三月八号还是九号，绿宝石岛之友们开展了热烈的争辩（大家全都参加了）。在争辩的过程中，使用了炮弹、单刃短弯刀、往返飞镖[210]、老式大口径短程霰弹枪、便器、绞肉机、雨伞、弹弓、指关节保护套[ 211] 、沙袋、铣铁块等武器，尽情地相互大打出手。还派信使专程从布特尔斯唐[212]把娃娃警察麦克法登巡警召了来。他很快就恢复了秩序，并火速提出，生日乃是同月十七号[213] 。这一解答使争辩双方都保住了面子。人人欢迎九尺汉子[214] 这个随机应变的建议，全场一致通过。绿宝石岛之友个个都向麦克法登巡警衷心表示谢忱， 而其中几个正大量淌着血。骑士团司令官贝尼诺贝诺内被人从大会主席的扶手椅底下解救出来，然后他的法律顾问帕格米米律师[ 215] 解释说，藏在他那三十二个兜[216] 里的形形色色的物品，都是他乘乱从资历较浅的同僚兜里掏出来的，以促使他们恢复理智。这些物品（包括几百位淑女绅士的金表和银表）被立即归还给合法的原主。和谐融洽的气氛笼罩全场。 朗博尔德身穿笔挺的常礼服，佩带着一朵他心爱的血迹斑斑的剑兰花[217] ，安详、谦逊地走上断头台。他凭着轻轻的一声朗博尔德派头的咳嗽通知了自己的到来。这种咳嗽多少人想模仿（却学不来）：短促，吃力而富有特色。这位闻名全世界的刽子手到来后，大批围观者报以暴风雨般的欢呼。总督府的贵妇们兴奋得挥着手帕。比她们更容易兴奋的外国使节杂七杂八地喝采着，霍赫、邦在、艾尔珍、吉维奥、钦钦、波拉·克罗尼亚、希普希普、维沃、安拉的叫声混成一片。其中可以清楚地听到歌之国代表那响亮的哎夫维瓦[218] 声（高出两个八度的F音， 令人回忆起阉歌手卡塔拉尼[219] 当年曾经怎样用那尖锐优美的歌声使得我们的高祖母们为之倾倒）。这时已十七点整。扩音器里传出了祈祷的信号。全体与会者立即脱帽，骑士团司令官那顶标志着族长身分的高顶阔边帽（自林齐[220] 那场革命以来，这就归他这一家人所有了），由他身边的侍医皮普[221] 博士摘掉了。当英勇的烈士即将被处死刑之际，一位学识渊博的教长在主持圣教赐与最后慰藉的仪式。本着最崇高的基督教精神，跪在一泓雨水中，将教袍撩到白发苍苍的头上，向慈悲的宝座发出热切恳求的祷告。断头台旁立着绞刑吏那阴森恐怖的身影，脸上罩着一顶可容十加仑的高帽子[222] ，上面钻了两个圆洞，一双眼睛从中炯炯地发出怒火。在等待那致命的信号的当儿，他把凶器的利刃放在筋骨隆隆的手臂上磨砺，要么就迅疾地挨个儿砍掉一群绵羊的头。这是他的仰慕者们为了让他执行这项虽残忍却非完成不可的任务而准备的。他身边的一张漂亮的红木桌上，整整齐齐地排列着肢解用刀、各式各样精工锻成的摘取内脏用的器具（都是举世闻名的、谢菲尔德市约翰·朗德父子公司[223] 刀具制造厂特制的）。还有一只赤土陶制平底锅，成功地把十二指肠、结肠、盲肠、阑尾等摘除后，就装在里面。另外有两个容量可观的牛奶罐：是盛最宝贵的牺牲者那最宝贵的血液用的。猫狗联合收容所[224] 的膳务员也在场。这些容器装满后，就由他运到那家慈善机构去。当局还用意周到地为这场悲剧的中心人物提供了一份丰盛的膳食，包括火腿煎鸡蛋，炸得很好的洋葱配牛排，早餐用热气腾腾的美味面包卷儿，以及提神的茶。他精神抖擞，视死如归，自始至终极其关心这档子事的种种细节。他以当代罕见的克制，不失时机站起来，慷慨激昂地表明了自己临终的一个愿望（并立即得到首肯）：要求将这份膳食平均分配给贫病寄宿者协会的会员们，以表示他对他们的关怀和敬重。当那位被遴选出来的新娘涨红了脸，拨开围观者密集的行列冲过来，投进为了她的缘故而即将被送入永恒世界的那个人壮健的胸脯时，大家的情绪高涨到极点[225] 。英雄深情地搂抱着她那苗条的身子，亲昵地低声说：“希拉，我心爱的。”听到这样称她的教名、她深受鼓舞。于是她就以不至于损害他那身囚衣的体面为度，热情地吻着他身上所有那些适当的部位。当他们二人的眼泪汇成一股咸流时，她向他发誓说，她会永远珍视关于他的记忆，决不会忘怀他 这个英勇的小伙子是怎样嘴里哼着歌儿，就像是到克隆土耳克公园[226] 去打爱尔兰曲棍球那样地走向死亡。她使他回忆起幸福的儿童时代那快乐日子。那时他们一道在安娜·利菲河岸上尽情地做着天真烂漫的幼儿游戏。他们忘却了当前这可怕的现实，一道畅怀大笑。所有在场的人，包括可敬的教士，也参加到弥漫全场的欢快气氛中。怪物般万头攒动的观众简直笑得前仰后合。然而不久他们两个人就又被悲哀所压倒，最后一次紧紧地握了手。从他们的泪腺里再一次滔滔地涌出泪水。众多的围观者打心坎里感动了，悲痛欲绝地哽咽起来，连年迈的受俸教士本人也同样哀伤。膀大腰粗的彪形大汉，在场维持治安的官员以及皇家爱尔兰警察部队那些和蔼的巨人都毫无忌惮地用手绢擦拭着。可以蛮有把握地说，在这规模空前的大集会上，没有一双眼睛不曾被泪水润湿。这时一桩最富于浪漫主义色彩的事情发生了：一个以敬重妇女著称的年轻英俊的牛津大学毕业生[227] 走上前去，递上自己的名片、银行存折和家谱，并向那位不幸的少女求婚，恳请她定下日期。她当场就首肯了。在场的每位太大小姐都接受了一件大方雅致的纪念品：一枚骷髅枯骨图案[228] 的饰针。这一既合时宜慷慨的举动重新激发了众人的情绪。于是，这位善于向妇女献殷勤的年轻的牛津大学毕业生（顺便提一下，他拥有阿尔比安[229] 有史以来最享盛名的姓氏）将一枚用几颗绿宝石镶成四叶白花酢浆草状的名贵的订婚戒指，套在他那忸怩得涨红了脸的未婚妻手指上时，人们感到无比兴奋。甚至连主持这一悲惨场面的面容严峻的宪兵司令，那位陆军中校汤姆金- 马克斯韦尔·弗伦奇马伦·汤姆林森，尽管他曾经毫不犹豫地用炮弹把众多印度兵炸得血肉横飞[230] ，当前也抑制不住感情的自然流露了。他伸出有着锁子甲的防护长手套，悄然抹掉一滴泪。[231] 那些有幸站在他身边的随行人员听见他低声喃喃自语着： “该死，那个娘儿们可是尤物哩，那个令人心如刀绞的丫头。该死，我一看见她就感到心如刀绞，快要哭出来了。老实说，就是这样。因为她使我想起在利姆豪斯路等待着我的旧酿酒桶。”[232] 于是，“市民”就谈起爱尔兰语啦，市政府会议啦，以及所有那些不会讲本国语言、态度傲慢的自封的绅士啦。乔是由于今天从什么人手里捞到了一镑金币，也来插嘴。布卢姆叼着向乔讨来的值两便士的烟头，探过他那黏乎乎的老脑袋瓜儿，大谈起盖尔语协会啦，反对飨宴联盟[233] 啦，以及爱尔兰的祸害--酗酒。由他来提反对飨宴，倒蛮合适哩。哼，他会让你往他的喉咙里灌各种酒，一直灌到上主把他召走，你也见不到他请的那品脱酒的泡沫儿。有个晚上，我和一个伙伴儿去参加他们的音乐晚会。照例载歌载舞：她能爬上干草堆，她能，我的莫琳·蕾。[234]那儿有个家伙佩带着巴利胡利蓝缓带徽章[235] ，用爱尔兰语唱着绝妙的歌儿。还有好多金发少女[236] 带着不含酒精的饮料到处转悠，兜售纪念章、桔子和柠檬汽水以及一些陈旧发干的小圆面包。哦，丰富多彩的[237] 娱乐，就甭提啦，禁酒的爱尔兰乃是自由的爱尔兰。[238] 接着，一个老家伙吹起风笛来。那些骗子们就都随着老母牛听腻了的曲调[239] 在地上拖曳着脚步，一两个天国的向导四下里监视着，防止人们行为狠亵，对女人动手动脚。 不管怎样，正如我方才说过的，那条老狗瞧见罐头已经空了，就开始围着乔和我转来转去，觅着食。倘若这是我的狗，我就老老实实地教训它一顿，一定的。不时地朝着不会把它弄瞎的部位使劲踢上一脚，好让它打起精神来。 “你怕它咬你一口吗？”“市民”讥笑着问。 “哪儿的话，”我说，“可它兴许会把我的腿当成路灯柱子哩。” 于是，他把那只老狗喊了过去。 “加里，你怎么啦？”他说。 于是，他着手把它拖过来，捉弄了一通，还跟它讲爱尔兰话。老狗咆哮着作为应答，就像歌剧中的二重唱似的。像这样的相互咆哮简直是前所未闻。闲得没事的人应该给报纸写篇《为了公益[240] 》，提出对这样的狗应该下道封口令。这狗又是咆哮，又是呜呜号叫。它喉咙干枯，眼睛挂满了血丝，从口腔里嘀嘀嗒嗒地淌着狂犬症的涎水。 凡是关心对下等动物（它们数目众多[241] ）传播人类文化者，切不可漏掉这条著名的爱尔兰老塞特种红毛狼狗。先前它曾以“加里欧文”这一外号闻名，新近在它那范围很广的熟人朋友的圈子内，又被改名为欧文·加里[242] 了。诚然令人惊异的是此狗所显示的“人化”现象。基于多年慈祥的训练和精心安排的食谱，这次表演的众多成就中，还包括诗歌朗诵。当今我国最伟大的语音学专家（任何野马也不得把他从我们当中拖走！）不遗余力地对它所朗诵的诗加以阐释比较，查明此诗与古代凯尔特吟游诗人的作品有着显著的（重点系我们所加）相似之处。这里说的并非读书界所熟悉的那种悦耳的情歌，原作者真名不详，使用的是“可爱的小枝”[243] 一文雅的笔名；而是（正如署名D、O、C、的撰稿人在当代某晚报上发表的饶有兴味的通信中所指出的那种）更辛辣、更动人的调子。眼下颇孚众望的现代派色彩更浓的抒情诗人自不用说，就连在著名的拉夫特里[244] 和多纳尔·麦科康西丁[245] 的讽刺性漫笔中也可以找到。这里我们添加一首由一位卓越学者译成英文的诗作为范例。眼下我们不便将他的大名公诸于世。不过我们相信，读者准能从主题上得到暗示，而不必指名道姓。狗的这首原诗在韵律上使人联想到威尔士四行诗那错综的头韵法和等音节规律，只是要复杂多了。然而我们相信读者会同意，译文巧妙地捕捉了原诗的神髓。也许还应该补充一句：倘若用缓慢而含糊不清的声调来朗读欧文这首诗，那就更能暗示出被抑制的愤懑，效果会大为增加。