Chapter 149 part four

The Words and Deeds of the Good Grandeur Presented by Master Francois Rabelais, Doctor of Medicine Most venerable Prince O'Day, Cardinal of Castile, the most famous Prince, you must know how many great men I have been, and are daily encouraged, entreated, and prodded, to bring the The story goes on. They say that there are many people who are weak, sick, or have other annoyances and misfortunes. After reading my book, they will forget their troubles, live a happy life, be cheerful, and get new comfort.For these readers, I have always thought that I am writing in a game, neither for honor nor for any praise, I just want to do my best to give some meager comfort to those patients who are distressed and far away from their relatives, just like giving me Like my patients, as long as they need my skills and help, I don't do it unwillingly.

More than once I told them in lengthy sermons how Hippocrates, in various places, especially in the sixth book of On Epidemics, addressed to his pupils the duty of practicing medicine, and how the Ephesians asked Lanus ③, Oribatius ④, Clotius Galleon, Hari Abbas ⑤, and other eminent writers have also discussed, they talk about the doctor's actions, attitudes, eyes, dealing with people, Demeanor, clothing, beard, hair, hands, mouth, even how to groom nails are discussed, just like playing the role of suitor or careerist in a comedy, or fighting some powerful opponent.Indeed, Hippocrates quite aptly compared the practice of medicine to combat, to a drama played out by the three—patient, doctor, and disease⑥.

Talking about this record⑦ sometimes reminds me of a sentence Julia said to her father Octavian Augustus⑧.One day, she stood in front of her father, richly dressed and dissolute, and her father was very displeased, but did not say a word.The next day she changed her dress, dressed very plainly, as the simple women of Rome were attired, and came again to her father.Her father, seeing her dressed so freely the day before, showed no dissatisfaction, and now seeing her become so simple, he couldn't help saying with joy: "Ah! how well and how well this dress fits the daughter of Augustus!"

Julia had already prepared her words, and immediately replied: "Today I dressed like that for my father. Yesterday, I dressed like that to please my husband." ① Prince Auday, Cardinal of Castration, was the elder brother of the three brothers of the Corini family. The second brother was Caspar, commander of the French navy. He was killed in the massacre of Protestants in 1572. The third brother was De Andre Sir Law.When O'Day was eighteen years old, he was appointed as a cardinal by Pope Clement VII, and he held important positions. When the author of this book and this dedication, O'Day was a bishop in Baowai, and he converted to Protestantism shortly afterwards and became Calvin. Pope Pius IV announced the revocation of his post as bishop and excommunication. O'Day went to England and was poisoned to death.When the book was first published in 1548, there were only eleven chapters without such a dedication.

② The author once said that he wrote while drinking and eating. ③ Solanos: A Greek medical scientist in the second century who practiced medicine in Alexandria and Rome. ④ Oribatius: The imperial physician of Roman Emperor Julian. ⑤ Harry Abbas: Persian medical scientist in the tenth century. ⑥ Hippocrates said in the sixth volume of "On Epidemics" that "the practice of medicine has three objects, namely diseases, patients and doctors".Here the author describes them as the three acting together in a play. ⑦ Refers to the passage of Hippocrates. ⑧ See Chapter 5 of Volume II of Macrobius' Saturnalia.

The same is true for the doctor, who can dress up to the point of wearing what Petrus Alexandrinus calls Philonium in the sixth volume of his commentary on Epidemics, which was necessary for practicing medicine in ancient times. Whoever thinks he wears a splendid robe with four sleeves, may answer: "I dress up like this not for the sake of beauty and publicity, but for the patients I want to visit. Because I just wholeheartedly please the patient, not to dislike him, not to make him sad." Also, in another passage of the same work of the old Mr. Hippocrates mentioned above, it is not whether the doctor's face is gloomy, rough, obstinate, and unattractive like Gado Joyful, critical, stern, frightening, and distressing to the patient; or whether the face of the doctor is cheerful, stable, graceful, cheerful, joyful, and comforting to the patient; these have long been proven and affirmed; From the psychological effect of the doctor's behavior, judge the result of one's own disease from the doctor's behavior, that is: if the doctor is beaming, he is full of hope; if the doctor is downcast, he is disappointed; in other words, the doctor is infected A cheerful or gloomy, sublime or low, cheerful or sad mental influence in a patient.This is what Plato and Aphroes say.

In addition, the above-mentioned scholars also specially instruct the doctor what to talk to the patients who call him, what topics to talk about, how to talk and dialogue.All these must have one purpose, one result, and that is: to please the patient as much as possible without violating the sacred conditions, and in any case not to cause him distress.Herophilus severely reprimanded the practitioner of medicine, Carianax, because when a patient asked him, "Shall I die?", he replied indifferently: "Batroclus will die too, not to mention you who are far inferior to him!"

Another patient, wishing to know the state of his disease, asked him, in the manner of the venerable Bartram: "Does my pee mean I'm about to die?" He nonchalantly replied: "No, as long as your mother is Latona, the mother of two respectable children, Forbes and Diana." Clotius Galien also criticized his medical predecessor Gantus in the fourth volume of the commentary on the sixth volume of "On Epidemics". Tus said: "Master, you must have eaten, I smell alcohol in your mouth." He replied rudely: "I smell malaria in your mouth, which one is better? Malaria or alcohol?"

But some pig-dog faces, sinister and vicious people, people who never smile, are too fierce to me, and they are completely unreasonable. They made me unable to bear it anymore, and I decided not to write a word.Their most usual invective is that my book is full of heresy (in fact, they can't point out a single place); By Johannes Alexandrinus. ② Le Duchaux explained that Philonium is a priest-style sleeveless robe. ① Afroes: A famous Arab medical scientist and philosopher in the twelfth century. ② Hierophylus: Greek medical scientist in the fourth century. ③ Carianax and Hierophilus belong to the same faction of medical scientists. For the allusion here, see Galen’s commentary on the sixth volume of Hippocrates’s "On Epidemics", but criticizes Carianax’s Not Herophilus, but Bakius.

④ For a sentence said by Achilles, see line 107 of Volume 21. ① See lines 656 and 657 of the comedy "Bartland". ② Latona: The love return of Jupiter in mythology, the mother of Apollo and Diana. There are jokes, and there are many, because this is the only theme and subject matter in my book, but there is nothing disrespectful to the sacred, to the king.As for heresies, there is none at all, unless they willfully assert that there is a violation of reason and the use of language; this, if possible, and even if I thought about it, I would die a thousand times.They interpret the bread as a stone, the fish as a snake, and the egg as a scorpion.Therefore, I present my dissatisfaction to the bishop, and tell you what is in my heart, if I do not see that I am indeed a far superior believer to them, if in my life, in my writings, in my speech, and even In my mind, I see a little heresy, and I will follow the example of the phoenix, and pile up dry wood, light a fire, and burn myself, so that they will not fall so disgustingly into the swamp of slanderers Here, this is Διaβολοs② using its messenger to frame me.

The Bishop can testify to me that our late King François, whom we will never forget, made the same slander, and ordered the most learned and faithful reader in the country to read my book carefully and clearly. I read it to him (I say "my book" because I have written several maliciously assuming that I wrote it), but it turned out that no suspicious passages were found. An inadvertent mistake in ranking M as N⑤ is deeply dissatisfied with the heresy that asserts that the author deserves death. His Royal Highness at that time, that is, our so good, so virtuous, and blessed King Henry (may God bless him with endless blessings), also heard the reading of this book, and authorized the bishop to grant me a dispensation and protection to fight against those slanderers.The bishop informed me of this great news in Paris, and you told me later when you visited Cardinal du Boule.At that time the Bishop Du Boule was recuperating after a long illness at Saint-Maur, a place (to say the least) a paradise of health, comfort, tranquility, convenience, elegance, and all the pleasures of a truly rural and pastoral life. Therefore, my lord bishop, now freed from all fears, and wielding my bald pen again, I beg your merciful patronage to help me against those slanderers, who in learning, prudence, and eloquence are like the second Hercules of Gaul. , in strength, power, and majesty like Alexiscachus; I can speak of you as wise King Solomon spoke of Moses, the great prophet and leader of Israel, in the forty-fifth chapter of Ecclesiastes : "A man who feared God, loved his people, loved by God and man, and remembered forever by the people. God, who is praised, made him a warrior, a great man whom his enemies feared; for his mercy, he did amazing things. cause; honor him before kings; let the people know the will of God in him, and see the light of God in him. God made him firm in faith, good and humble, and chose him from all mankind; There the voice of God is heard, calling him an example of life and wisdom for those who are in darkness." Furthermore, I would like to assure the Bishop that whoever congratulates me for this delightful text, I will ask them to express their gratitude to you, to you alone, and to pray that God bless you and make you greater; I expect nothing from me but humble devotion and obedience to your counsel.Because it was the bishop's lofty instructions that gave me courage and inspiration, without you, my heart would be a ① Phoenix bird: a mythical phoenix, it is said that it burns itself to death every five hundred years, and then resurrects from the ashes. ② Greek: "the devil, the slanderer". ③ __________ King Francois I of France asked the eloquent to recite the whole book for him in order to prove whether the content of "Pagagure" was heretical or not, but no defects were found.At that time, the king's reciter was Pierre du Shatel, who had been a bishop in Dulle, Macon and Orleans successively. ④ Refers to the priests, who hide in the monastery all day long, just like the cavemen who ate snakes in the past; see Plinius' "Natural History Compendium", Volume V, Chapter VIII. ⑤ "sme" (soul) is misplaced as "asne" (donkey), see Chapter 22 of Part Three of this book. ⑥ Saint-Maur: the place name of the Seine department in France. ① Lucien has related that Hercules won many powerful people to him because of his eloquence. ② Aleksikakos: another title of Hercules, according to the Greek, it means "the protector of the poor and the relief". ③ "Old Testament? Ecclesiastes" only twelve chapters, here refers to the "Bible" outside the "Apocrypha". Without possessions, the fountain of my wisdom will dry up.May the Lord God bless you with his divine favor.Paris, January 28, 1552. Your Most Humble and Obedient Servant Dr. François Rabelais Foreword by Master François Rabelais for the Fourth Book of the Words and Deeds of the Magnificent Save you, bless you!where are you?I can't see.Wait until I put on my glasses!Ha ha!Lent is over! ②I saw you.And how clearly you can see!I've heard your wines are very well made, which makes me so fond of them.You have at last found a reliable anti-thirsty medicine.This is great.Are you, your women, children, relatives, friends, and family members all right?OK, great, I'm so relieved.May God, the good God, be blessed forever, and (if this be His will), be you forever. As for me, by the mercy of God, I am still alive, TOEFL TOEFL.It's a bit of Grandguil (you know that's an optimism that despises things outside of us), healthy and healthy, and we'll have a drink whenever you like.Good people, do you want to ask why this is?Give you a definite answer: this is the holy will of the supreme and good God, I respect it, obey it, and respect the holy words in the Gospel, the fourth chapter of "Luke Gospel" is so harsh to a doctor who neglects his own health The sarcasm and sharp ridicule: "Doctor, you heal yourself ③." Clotus Galleon paid attention to his own body, but he was not like this, although he was very familiar with the Bible, and he also had acquaintances and contacts with the believers at that time. Chapter 3 and Chapter 2 of the third volume of the same book make it clear; he only fears the common jest: 'Ιητρo■■λλωγ, α■το■■λχεδιβρ■ωγ①? . Doctors can only cure other people's diseases; but they themselves are full of pain②. He often said proudly that he didn't want others to know that he was a doctor, but that he was in good health from the age of twenty-eight to old age, except for a few days of cold and fever, although he was not born the best. Healthy, and his appetite is naturally not temperate. "Because (he said in the fifth volume of "Health Essentials"), it is difficult to imagine that a doctor who neglects his own health can treat other people's diseases." The physician Acrebiades, exaggerating even more, said that he had made a pact with Fate that he would not be a doctor if he suffered from illness from the time of his practice until his last old age.This he has done completely, he is strong and strong, and he has defeated the god of fate.Until the end, he was free from any disease, and only traded life for death by accidentally falling down a moldy and wrecked staircase. In case your health escapes, no matter where you go, up and down, back and forth, left and right, in and out, no matter how far or near you are, as long as you have the blessing of the Savior, you will always meet it again immediately!As soon as you meet it, grab it, grab it, grab it, grab it!Method ① This preface was originally published by Fizantha in 1552. When it was first published in 1548, the fourth volume had only eleven chapters, and the preface was also different. This is another article written by the author when it was republished. ② "The Lent period is over!" It was originally a game of Gao Kang's childhood. When meeting during the Lent period, whoever said this sentence first would win the agreed prize. ③ "New Testament? The Gospel of Luke" Chapter 4, Section 23. ① Greek, which was written by Plutarch to an unnamed Greek tragic poet in his speech against Epicurean Korotes, see below for meaning. ② The verses of Euripides were also mentioned by Erasmus in Section 32 of Chapter 4 of Book IV of Proverbs. ③ Acrebiades: An ancient Greek doctor in the first century BC who founded a school in Rome to oppose the Hippocrates theory. ④ See Section 124, Chapter 37, Volume VII of Plinius' "Compendium of Natural History". The law permits it, the king consents to it, and I urge you to do so, just as the ancient legislators permitted the master to pursue the fugitive servant, wherever he was found.Good God and good people!In this noble, ancient, beautiful, prosperous, and rich French country, isn't it always stipulated and used to "be passed on from the dead to the living"?If you don’t believe me, please take a look at the cardinal minister of Henry II, the great king of Weizhen Wanfang, that kind, learned, prudent, humane, merciful, and just Andre Tiracco, the most admired and most respected in Paris. How it was announced in the courtroom.Arifulon, a native of Western Juan, has made it clear that health is our life.Without health, life is not equal to living, it is equivalent to living without living: β■ο■β■ο■, β■ο■■β■ντο■③.Without health, life is but emaciation; to live is to die.Therefore, if health is lost (which is death), then life is lost, life (which is health) is lost. I hope that God will hear our prayers, (because we pray with firm faith.) and grant our wishes, because our wishes are regulated.Temperance, the ancient sages compared it to gold, which means that it is a precious quality that everyone praises and welcomes everywhere.If you look through the Bible, you will see that only the prayers of the temperate are accepted, not rejected.An example is that of little Zacchaeus, whose relics are boasted by the priests of Saint-Ire, near Orléans, and who have been consecrated as Saint-Sylvain.Zacchaeus had no other desire, he just wanted to see the praised Savior in the suburbs of Jerusalem.This wish is really not a big one, everyone will have it; it's a pity that he is too short, and he can't see anything when he is squeezed in the crowd.He stomped anxiously, jumped wildly, crowded hard, and finally climbed onto a mulberry tree.The merciful God saw his devout and humble desires, came to him, not only let him see, but spoke to him, and went to his house to bless his family. There is also a son of the prophet of Israel who was cutting down trees in the Jordan River, and the ax fell into the river by mistake (the story is recorded in Chapter 6, Section 4 of "Old Testament - 2 Kings").He begged God to return his axe.This requirement cannot be considered too great.With firm faith and confidence, he did not throw the handle first, and then the axe, as those censorious devils scorn and rumour, profess, but he lost the ax first, and then threw the handle, as you rightly as stated.At this time, two miracles suddenly happened, that is, the ax floated up from the depths of the water and installed itself on the handle of the axe.If he wishes to go to heaven by train like Elijah, to prosper like Abraham, to be rich like Job, to be as powerful as Samson, and to be as beautiful as Abu Salom, will he be able to do that?It's hard to say. Speaking of desires as temperate as the ax (don't forget to tell me when you drink), I will tell you a story written in the fables of the French Aesop. Loyas, as Maximus Planudus says; but from this people, according to faithful historians, the noble Frenchmen came.Arianus said he was a Thracian An ancient interjection. ② Ariphron: An ancient Greek poet, the poems of Ariphron were quoted in the last chapter of the fifteenth volume of "The Complete Works of Arteus". ③ Greek: "Life is not life, and life is not life." This is a sentence from King Beerus of Epirus. ④ Zacchaeus the tax collector was short in stature. He climbed a tree to watch Jesus pass by. Jesus stayed at his house. For the story, see chapter 19, verses 1 to 10 of "New Testament? Gospel of Luke". ⑤ St. Il: Place name, Mont City near the Royal River in Orleans. ① St. Silvain is the patron saint of the forest. Zacchaeus named him the tree god because he climbed the tree. ② Refers to the theological master who checked the works of Solpon. ③ Maximus Planudus: A Greek scholar in the 14th century, who is considered to be the author of "The Biography of Aesop". It is also said that he wrote "Fables", which is considered to be the work of Aesop. ④ It is said that the French nation came from Frangus, the son of Ekdor. Aesop is both a Philippian and a Trojan, so he is also a Frenchman. The author here intends to be far-fetched. ⑤ According to Herodotus, Agathias ① said that he was a Samian ②; in fact, I think it is all the same. In Aesop's time, there was a poor villager named Kuatris from Graves, who lived in poverty by cutting firewood.One day, the ax suddenly disappeared.Who is it that is troubled and angry?Of course it was he, for his fortune and life depended on the ax, by which he maintained his honor and reputation among the rich woodcutters, and without it he would starve to death.Six days later, Death saw that he had no axe, and wanted to give him a sickle to cut him off from the world. He was terrified, screaming, begging, pleading for life, and at the same time dexterously praying to Jupiter from the scriptures (need, you know, eloquence), knelt on the ground, looked up into the sky, and the light With head bowed, both hands raised to the sky, all fingers stretched out, and every word of prayer was recited aloud tirelessly. "I want my axe, Jupiter! Give me my axe, give me my axe! I want nothing else, Jupiter. I want my axe, or the money to buy one." O my! My poor axe!" Jupiter was now presiding over an emergency council in heaven, and the aged Cuberi, or the handsome young Forbes, as you call it, was giving his opinion.Cuatres shouted at the top of his throat, so that all the gods in the assembly in the sky could hear him. Asked Jupiter: "Who's that yelling in the lower world? Talk to the Styx, aren't we busy enough with hard and important things we were and are? We've just finished Persia The quarrel between Lestang ⑤ and the emperor of Constantinople, Sultan Soliman ① stopped the fight between the Tartars and the Muscovites ② and granted the request of the chieftain ③. We also agreed to Gorkoz Reis ④ wishes. The Parma incident has just been resolved⑤, and then the Magdeburg incident⑥, the Mirandola incident⑦, and the Africa incident⑧ (Africa is the city of mortals on the Mediterranean Sea, which we call Aphrodisium⑨).Tripoli has changed masters because of improper defense: the time has come⑩. _________ Here, the Gascons revolt and demand their bell (11).In that corner there are Saxons, Eastlings(12), Ostrogoths and Germans, the Germans were once unbreakable, but now they are so weak that a little man with a physical disability (13) took them ruled.They ask us to avenge them, assist them, and restore their original good reason and original freedom (14).There are also two people, Ram and Galan (15), who brought their own helpers, supporters, and supporters, and messed up the entire Paris Seminary. How should we deal with it?I can't do anything, and I don't know which side to fall. ⑤ See the fifth chapter of the tenth volume of "Story Sanji" written by Arianus. ① Agathias: Greek poet and historian in the sixth century. ② See Section 134 of the second volume of Herodotus' History.Samos is a small island in Greece. ③ Kuberi: Wife of Saturn and mother of Jupiter in mythology. ④ In mythology, Jupiter and the gods in the sky used to swear in the name of the Styx River. ⑤ "Prestre Tang" is the transliteration of Prestre Jear, which is said to be the king of Ethiopia and Persia at that time. ① In 1548 and 1549, Soliman occupied thirty-two cities in Persia. ② Refers to the battle of the Tatars against the Russians in 1548. ③ Refers to the invasion of Oran by the Moroccan chief in 1550 at the instigation of France. ④ Golkoz Reis: Dracoz Reis, the commander of the Turkish navy in the sixteenth century, invaded Sicily in 1552 and threatened the Mediterranean Sea. ⑤ Refers to the war caused by Charles V and Henry II Impama, and an armistice agreement was reached in April 1552. ⑥ Magdeburg: Prussian place name, was besieged by Maurice de Sachs for a year in 1552, and was eventually trapped. ⑦ Mirandola: Italian city name. ⑧ Africa: Mehdia in Tunisia. ⑨ The names of places by gods are different from those of mortals, see the 29th line in the 14th volume of Homer, and the 74th line in the 20th volume of Homer. ⑩ In 1551, the Turks acquired Tripoli from the Knights of St. John of Jerusalem. At that time, it was said that Henry II had secretly helped the Turks. The author here said that it was due to improper defense. Their quarrels aside, I think they're both good and cowards at the same time.One has a lot of "sun coins," I mean real fine coins; the other wants to be like him. One is talented and the other is not a fool.One loves the good, the other is loved by the good.One is as cunning and eccentric as a fox, and the other criticizes and barks like a dog at ancient philosophers and orators.Big Priapus, what do you think, tell me?I have always found your opinion just and moderate, et habet tua mentula mentem. " "Prince Jupiter," said Priapus, taking off his hat, and calmly raising his shining red head, "you compare the one to a great barking dog, and the other to If you are a cunning fox, then I advise you to stop getting angry and get angry, and just deal with dogs and foxes in the same way you used to deal with dogs and foxes." "What?" asked Jupiter. "When did it happen? What dog and fox? Where?" "What a memory you have!" replied Priapus. "Do you still remember the venerable old man Bagus, with a red face, standing here, wanting to avenge the Thebes, and got a god fox? Let it do harm, there is nothing like it in the world Animals can do nothing to it. The honorable Wu Gang made a dog out of the copper of Monessian, and blew it with his mouth to make the dog alive. He gave you the dog, you gave your dear Eropas, she gave Minos, Minos gave Procles, and Procles gave Sipharus at last.This dog is also a god dog. Like today's lawyers, no one can escape it by catching whatever it encounters.The two animals met one day.Guess what?That dog is destined to catch a fox when it sees it; that fox is also destined not to be caught by it. "This case is brought to your court. You say that you cannot violate fate. But these two animals are destined to be contradictory. These two contradictions are indeed irreconcilable in nature when put together. You have made a big mistake. Sweating. Your sweat dripped on the ground, and several Chinese cabbages grew out. The noble court couldn’t come up with a decisive decision for a while, and the gods felt extremely thirsty. They drank seventy-eight barrels of wine in the court at once. More, finally I came up with an idea, you turned them into stone. The problem was solved, and the thirst stopped on the vast Olympus. That year in Thebes and Chalsis Between ② and near Teumesus ③, there is an adult with weak testicles. "Having this example, I suggest that you also turn the dog and the fox into stone: anyway, there have been examples. Both are named Pierre. There is an old saying in Limoges, One oven, three stones, and you add Pierre du Cornier to make up the sum, he was turned into stone by you for the same reason in the past. These three dead stones are just right Put it in the Paris cathedral⑦ or under the main entrance, forming an equilateral triangle, like the "Fukai game" ①, so that they can use ① Galen to be rich. After his death, he left an annuity of five hundred "livres" to the Paris Seminary In 1551, he was still suffering from the gout that rich people have. The author of this book is against him and Aristotle. The most fashionable philosopher at that time was Plato. ② Latin: "Your brain is clever and clever", and it can also explain "Your guy has a heart". ③ Monessian: Aquitaine of ancient Gaul, see Chapter 19 and Chapter 33 of Volume IV of Plinius's "Compendium of Natural History". ① Xiphalus: The husband of Procles in mythology. ② Chalsis: the name of the western city of ancient Greece. ③ Teumesus: the forest near the city of Nemea in ancient Greece. Writers such as Pausanias and Ovid once said that the fox came from here. See the seventh and sixth lines of Chapter VII of Ovid. Chapter 19 of the ninth volume of Nias's "Greek Travels". ④ Refers to Ram and Galang. ⑤ "Bierre" means "rock, stone". ⑥ In the 14th century, the jurist Pierre de Cornier once represented King Philip VI against the Pope’s Decree proclaimed by the church. Later, there was a stone in the corner of the Paris Cathedral for extinguishing candles for the believers. Everyone called it It "Pierre du Cornier" (meaning "corner stone"), because it is homonymous with the name of the jurist, it became "Cornier's stone", and the church also deliberately insulted the church enemy. ⑦ Refers to the Church of Notre Dame de Paris. Nose extinguishes lighted candles, torches, candles, wax, lamps, etc., for while they live they specialize in creating divisions, sects, factions, and sects among idle scholars.It is much better for these humble, self-righteous people holding their own follicles to be reviled by the world forever than for you to judge them.That's all I have to say. " Said Jupiter: "My dear Mr. Priaples, I can see that you are too kind to them. You don't treat all of them in this way. For they want to live forever, so that after death instead of becoming mud and dung, or turn them into hard stones. Look behind you where the Tyrrenian Sea and the Alps are near, and do you see how much tragedy a few rogue priests have caused? This storm will As long-lasting as the Limoges' kilns, but they will perish, though not so quickly. We're going to be busy again. I see only one inconvenience, and that's since the gods of heaven got mine After the thunderbolts were allowed to be thrown at New Antioch without hesitation,5 we have few remaining mines. Your example was followed by the young soldiers who guarded the castle of Dendnarova6, and they put the ammunition They were all used to fight sparrows, but they ran out of ammunition when they needed self-defense. They bravely gave up the castle and surrendered to the enemy. Don't think about anything else. Wu Gang child, you must pay attention to this! Wake up your sleeping Cyclopo, Astropo, Bronte, Algay, Polyphemus, Stero Bo, Pyracmon! Get 'em to work, and fill 'em with wine! You can't lack alcohol for work.Now, hurry up and see who's yelling there.Go and see who it is, Marguri, and ask him what he wants. " Marguri glanced down from the skylight, from which it is said that the gods observed the lower world. It looked like a hatch on a ship (Icaromenipos said it was more like the mouth of a well③).As a result, Marguri saw that it was Kuatris who was yelling that his ax was missing, so he came back to report to the heaven. Jupiter said: "What a coincidence! We have nothing else to do now but to return his axe. The axe must be returned, because he was destined to have an axe, do you understand? It is related to the Duchy of Milan. Equally important ④. In truth, the ax is to him what the state is to the king. Quickly, give him back the ax! Let this matter be over! Now it is time to settle the dispute between the priest and the Abbey of Landerouse ⑤ .Where did it go?" Priapus was standing by the fireplace at this moment.After listening to Marguri's report, he said humbly and humorously: "My lord, Jupiter, when I took your order and by your special favor to serve as a caretaker in the garden of the earth, I noticed that the word ax has several meanings. It refers to something other than chopping wood. In addition to tools, it refers (at least it used to be explained) that thing that is often played with in women. I have seen boys call girls he likes, often saying: 'My little axe.' Because they are so strong and courageous Absolutely (he pulls out his half-ancon-long thing as he speaks)* "Fukai" means "squirrel," and "Fukai game" is a game of blowing out candles by exhaling through the nose. ② Tirrhenian Sea: That is, the dry sea of ​​Aetolia. ③ Refers to the massacre of the Vaudoist priests ordered by the court of Aix in 1547 in the city of Cabrière. ④ "New Antioch": It may refer to Rome, or it may refer to Geneva, because Calvinism is prevailing there. ⑤ It seems to refer to the influence of Protestantism on the old religion. ⑥ Dande Naluowa: The author's fictional place name. ⑦ Asterobo: A daughter of Atlas in mythology. ① Brontai: The son of heaven and earth in mythology, he made mines together with Sikelopo. ② 阿尔盖：神话中女猎人，因吹嘘比太阳跑得还快，被阿波罗变成了鹿。 ③ 见鲁西安著《伊卡洛美尼波斯》第二十五章。 ④ 弗朗索瓦一世一直想得到它。 ⑤ 可能指当时都尔圣加提安会和圣马丁会争夺圣马丁遗骸之纠纷。 插进她们那件事物之后，她们就不用再害什么女性疾病了；没有她们那个东西，它们便会从小肚子那里一下子耷拉到脚跟边。我还记得（我这个机关很好，我是说记忆的机关，大得足可装满一个奶油罐子）在祝圣号角节那一天①，也就是五月里吴刚的节日，曾听过一次出色的音乐，若斯干?戴?普雷②、奥尔开刚③、贺勃莱茨④、阿格里科拉⑤、布鲁迈尔⑥、卡莫兰、维高里斯、德?拉?法琪⑦、布吕埃尔、普利奥里斯⑧、塞干?德?拉?吕⑨、米狄、木吕⑩、木通(11)、加斯科涅(12)、路易塞特(13)、孔贝尔、贝奈特(14)、费文(15)、路塞(16)、理查弗尔、卢塞罗(17)、孔西里奥(18)、贡斯唐希奥?费斯提(19)、雅该特?贝尔康(20)等合作的大合唱： 提包新婚，进入洞房，一只大锤，藏在身旁。 '亲爱的（说话的是新娘），大锤将作何用场？ ' 提包说：'好事要它来帮忙。 ' '用不着（新娘把话讲），大个子约翰来看我，劲头全在屁股上。 ' “又过了九个'奥林匹克'②和一个闰年以后（我这个机关真行，我是说我的记忆真好！我经常混淆这两个名词的意思和关系），我还听过阿德里安?维拉尔③、贡贝尔④、查尼干⑤、阿尔卡代⑥、克罗丹⑦、塞尔通⑧、芒希古尔⑨、奥克塞尔、维利埃、桑德兰、索耶尔、赫斯丁、莫拉尔⑩、帕斯罗、马伊、马雅尔、雅各丹、赫尔特(11)、维尔德娄、卡庞特拉(12)、雷里提耶、卡德阿克，杜勃雷、维尔蒙①、布台耶、鲁比、帕尼耶、米耶、杜?莫兰②、阿莱尔、马罗、摩尔班、让德尔③等等在一个私人花园里凉爽① 当时罗马有祝圣号角的节日。 ② 若斯干?戴?普雷（1450—521）：海恼特作曲家，曾服务于教皇西克斯图斯四世和法国国王路易十二宫廷。 ③ 奥尔开刚（1430—496）：法国国王查理七世圣堂的音乐师。 ④ 贺勃莱茨：乌得勒支主教大堂音乐师。 ⑤ 阿格里科拉：荷兰籍宗教音乐家，奥尔开刚的学生。 ⑥ 布鲁迈尔：奥尔开刚的学生。 ⑦ 德?拉?法琪：荷兰籍宗教音乐家。 ⑧ 普利奥里斯：奥尔开刚的学生。 ⑨ 塞干?德?拉?吕：可能是两个人，比埃尔?德?拉?吕为布鲁塞尔菲力普教堂音乐师。 ⑩ 木吕：宗教音乐作曲家。 ① 这十行诗据说是十六世纪诗人莫兰?德?圣?惹莱的作品。 ② “奥林匹克”每四年举行一次，连头带尾为五年。 ③ 阿德里安?维拉尔：十六世纪比利时音乐家，威尼斯派音乐创立人。 ④ 尼古拉?贡贝尔：若斯干?戴?普雷的学生，查理五世教堂音乐师。 ⑤ 查尼干：歌曲《马里尼亚诺战役败迹》作曲者，宗教音乐家。 ⑥ 雅各?阿尔卡代：洛林红衣主教大堂音乐师。 ⑦ 克罗丹：即克罗德?德?塞尔米西，一五四七年亨利二世教堂音乐师。 ⑧ 比埃尔?塞尔通：巴黎圣堂教堂音乐师。 ⑨ 芒希古尔：阿拉斯教长。 ⑩ 莫拉尔：塞维尔主教大堂音乐师。 ① 比埃尔?维尔蒙：亨利二世教堂音乐师。 ② 约翰?杜?莫兰：桑斯主教大堂音乐师。 ③ 约翰?勒?让德尔：《音乐入门》作者。 的树荫底下，周围名酒、火腿、肉饺、还有熏烤的鹌鹑堆集如山，大家在唱： 没有柄的斧子无用场，没有柄的工具徒凄凉，工具须有柄来装，让我的柄装在你身上。 “现在须要知道的是库亚特里斯嚷着要哪一种斧子。” 那些尊严的男神灵和女神灵听了这番话，象一群苍蝇似的哄堂大笑。吴刚翘起他弯曲的假腿，向他的女友④表示爱情，转着圈轻盈地一连跳了三四跳。 朱庇特向迈尔古里说道：“过来，过来！你赶快到下界去，给库亚特里斯送去三把斧子：他原来的一把，另外再给他一把金的和一把银的，三把要完全一样。让他捡，如果他拿他自己的，而且心满意足，你就把另外两把全赠给他。如果他不拿自己的，而去拿另外任何一把，你就用他的斧子把他的头砍下来。今后对于遗失斧子的人，全都这样办理。” 朱庇特说完话，扭转头来，象一只猴狲吞下药丸那样，露出一个吓人的模样，奥林匹斯山上的全体神灵无不胆战心惊。 迈尔古里戴起他那顶尖帽，那顶作战的头盔，披上翅膀，拿起手杖，从天窗里一跃而下，破空而去，轻盈地往地上一落，把三把斧子放在库亚特里斯跟前，然后说道： “你叫喊得口渴了吧，你的祷告朱庇特已经听见了。这里有三把斧子，你看哪一把是你的，就拿去吧。” 库亚特里斯拿起那把金斧子，掂了掂觉着很重，向迈尔古里说道： “我凭良心说话，这一把不是我的，我不要。” 他掂了掂那把银斧子，说道： “这把也不是。我也不要。” 他拿起自己那把木柄斧子，往柄上看了看，认出了自己的记号，喜得浑身颤动，好象狐狸遇见迷失的母鸡那样，从鼻子尖上露出微笑，说道： “天主圣母！这一把是我的！如果你肯把它还给我，到五月半（十五）我准来给你上供，我送你一大盆牛奶，外加新鲜的杨梅。” 迈尔古里说道：“老好人，我还给你，你拿去吧。由于你在斧子这件事上表示知足克己，我奉朱庇特命令，把另外两把也一起送给你。今后你可以过富裕日子了，但是要做好人。” 库亚特里斯衷心感谢迈尔古里，向伟大的朱庇特表示尊敬，然后把自己的斧子拴在皮带上，让它垂在屁股上边，样子活象冈勃莱的马丁①。另外两把比较重，他背在肩膀上，就这样欢天喜地地走回家去，遇见自己教区的人和邻居时，不禁喜形于色，向他们说出巴特兰那句俏皮话： “我可有了吧②？” 第二天，他穿上一件白外套，把两把值钱的斧子背在肩上，到施农去了，根据学识渊博的“马孛莱”的判断和证明，施农真是一座杰出的城市，尊贵的城市，古老的城市，换句话说，世界上首屈一指的城市。到了施农，④ 指维纳斯。 ① 冈勃莱城的钟楼上有铜人击钟报时，它们的名字是马丁和马丁娜。 ② 巴特兰带着一匹呢子回家时所说的一句台词，见喜剧《巴特兰》第三五二行。 他把那把银斧子变卖成崭新的“代斯通”和其他的银币，把金斧子变卖作崭新的“萨吕”、“长羊毛金币”、“利得金币”①、“王朝金币”和“太阳金币”。用这些钱，他置下了大量的田产、仓库、农庄、田园、乡庄、农房、别墅、草原、葡萄地、树林、耕地、牧场、池塘、磨坊、花园、柳林、公牛、母牛、雌绵羊、公绵羊、牝山羊、母猪、公猪、驴、马、雌鸡、雄鸡、阉鸡、雏鸡、公鹅、母鹅、雌鸭、雄鸭等等等等。日子不久，他就成了当地最富有的人，甚至比瘸子莫勒维利耶②还富。 附近的张三李四看见库亚特里斯一步登天，心里好生纳闷；过去对这个穷人的同情和怜悯，现在一变而成了对他大发横财的妒忌了。他们奔走、打听、询问、侦察库亚特里斯究竟是用了什么方法，在什么地方，哪一天，哪一个时辰，怎么样，为了什么缘故，发了这笔大财的。结果，听说是因为失掉一把斧子，他们不禁说道： “哈哈！原来遗失一把斧子就可以发财啊？这个方法太容易了，而且所费无几。天命、星宿、命数的运转、到头来只是谁丢失斧子就可以一步登天啊？好极了，好极了！天主在上，斧子啊斧子，我马上把你丢掉，你可不要见怪！” 于是他们的斧子一把把全都不见了。连鬼也没有留下一把！谁不遗失斧子，就不是他娘养的。全区的树木没有人再去砍伐了，因为斧子已经绝了迹。 伊索在一篇寓言里还提到有几个小贵族，过去为了置办检阅时的衣着，曾把自己一片小草原、一座小磨坊卖给了库亚特里斯，现在听说这个人发财是因为一把斧子，他们全都把佩的剑卖掉买成斧子了，他们也要学那几个樵夫的样子把斧子丢掉，想借此方法来得到金山银库。你们如果把这些人比作往罗马的小朝圣者，是再恰当也没有了，他们卖光自己的一切，还要向别人借，好成堆地购买新教皇的赦罪状。这时只见他们又是呼唤，又是恳求，又是号叫，喊着朱庇特的名字。 “朱庇特啊，还我的斧子吧，还我的斧子吧！我的斧子丢在这里了，我的斧子丢在那里了，哎哟，哟，哟，哟，我的斧子啊！朱庇特啊，还我的斧子啊！” 遗失斧子的人的呼喊声、号叫声，响彻了整个天空。 迈尔古里急速把他们的斧子送了来，每个人、除了他们自己的斧子以外，还有一把金的和一把银的。他们全都挑选了金的，把它放在自己跟前，向伟大的赠与者朱庇特表示感谢；可是就在他们弯下腰去，再从地上直起腰来的当儿，迈尔古里便遵照朱庇特的指示砍下了他们的脑袋。脑袋的数目正好和遗失的斧子相等。 你们看，心地单纯、肯把坏东西留给自己的人，结果和他们有多么不同。你们全都应该以此为戒，你们这些平原上的老粗，你们常说宁舍一万法郎的年金也不能放弃愿望，今后可不要再听到你们象过去那样信口开河地祷告说：“天主保佑我马上有一亿七千八百万金币有多好！啊！那我是多么喜欢啊！”叫你们全都长冻疮！你们的希望这样大，一个国王、一个皇帝、一个教皇，又该希望什么呢？ ① “利得”：荷兰金币，面上铸有一骑士策马直奔敌人。 ② 莫勒维利耶：似指施衣莫勒维利耶庄主米歇尔?德?巴朗，田产直达沙维尼，富可敌国，一五二五年曾担保法国国王偿还欠款，为英国国王所接受。 所以，经验告诉你们，一个人痴心妄想，结果得到的就只能是疥癣和痂疤，口袋里不会有一个钱，完全象那两个巴黎式的叫化子一样，一个希望他崭新的“太阳金币”能和巴黎从建城之日起到现在为止的买卖总额（依照这段时期内生意最好的一年的税率、销货、总值计算）一样多。依照你们的看法，这个人是不是太难对付了？他是不是吃了不剥皮的酸李子？是不是酸了牙齿了？另一个呢，希望用圣母院的大教堂，从地下一直到弧形的房顶止，装满钢针，然后用“太阳金币”装满用这些针所缝制的口袋，能缝多少就装多少，一直到把最后的一个针用坏、用得没有尖为止。看他的野心有多大！ 你们觉着怎么样？结果如何呢？当天晚上，每人的脚后跟上都长了冻疮，下巴颏上长了下疳，肺里得了咳嗽病，喉咙里得了气管炎，屁股根上生肿毒，连塞塞牙缝的一块面包也没有。所以，要有节制；节制会使你们成功，如果你们肯干活，肯劳动，节制只会使你们更称心。 也许你们会说：“天主既然无所不能，他给我七万八千，跟给我半个小钱的十三分之一同样容易，一百万金币对于他不过等于一枚铜钱。” Hahaha!可怜的人啊，谁教给你们这样来评论天主的能力和命数呢？冷静一下吧！Stop messing around!在他神圣的面前应该自卑，承认自己的缺点。 患痛风的人，我的希望就寄托在这里，而且我坚决地相信，只要善良的天主乐意，你们一定会得到健康，因为目前你们所要求的也只是这一点。请你们加上半两耐心，稍微再等一下。看看那些热那亚人，早晨他们在书斋内、账房间，讨论好、想好、决定好这一天将向谁、将如何去拿钱、并且向哪些人使用诡计哄、骗、欺、诈之后，才到大街上去，见面时互相道好： “Sanita et guadain，messer①.”光有健康还不满足，他们还想有钱，顶好有伽台尼那样多的钱②。不过结果呢，常常是一样也得不到。所以拿出健康的样子，好好地咳嗽一声，畅饮三杯，然后爽爽快快地摇摇耳朵，且听一回尊贵善良的庞大固埃的惊人传记吧。 ① 意大利文：“先生，祝你健康，祝你发财。”正确的说法应该是sanita et guadagno，messere。 ② 伽台尼：指里昂之意大利金融家多玛?伽台尼，以豪富出名，法国国王被查理五世俘虏时曾向他借五万金币赎身。“伽台尼”（guadaigne）与“财富”（guadagno）谐音，作者在此处又有双关意思。