Chapter 22 -2

All this is like a spring dream.What surprised Dasa the most was that among all the people who were looking for him, the first to find him and the first to announce the good news to him was precisely Pravati, which is really great!Dasa found that the edge of the forest was full of tents, and the air was filled with smoke and the smell of roasting prey.Pravati was loudly congratulated by her attendants, and when she introduced her husband Dasa to everyone, a grand celebratory feast began.There was a young man in the crowd who was Dasa's companion during herding days, and he brought Pravati and his followers to the place where Dasa once lived and loved.As soon as the young man recognized Dasa, he laughed happily and ran towards him, intending to hug him affectionately or pat him on the shoulder as a gesture of friendship, but suddenly remembered that his partner was now the king, and suddenly froze as if Yes, was stunned for a moment, then slowly moved towards, bowed deeply respectfully and saluted, expressing congratulations.Dasara picked him up, hugged him, called his name affectionately, and asked him what he wanted.

The young shepherd wanted a heifer, and the new king immediately ordered that three of the most beautiful heifers be selected from the best herd and rewarded to him. More and more people were introduced to the new king, officials, hunter leaders, Brahmin priests, etc., and the king accepted their interviews one by one.The banquet was set up, and the leather drum, pipa, and flute were all played. Everything was magnificent and vigorous, making Dasa suddenly feel as if he was in a dream.He couldn't quite believe the facts before him, and the only real thing in his eyes was his young wife, Pravati, because she was leaning in his arms.

The brigade marched forward slowly, approaching the capital after a few days.The messenger went ahead and announced that the young king had been found and was on his way back to the capital.Once the news was confirmed, the whole city became lively with gongs and drums.A procession of Brahmin priests in white robes stepped forward to greet the new king, headed by Vasudeva's heir. Vasudeva, the very man who had sent Dasa to the shepherds twenty years ago to evade assassination, had just died a few days earlier. After the Brahmin priests cheered the king loudly, they sang hymns, and then led him into the palace, where countless huge sacrificial fires were lit.Daza was hugged into his new home, where he received more congratulations, salutes, blessings and welcome etiquette.Outside the palace, the festivities continued until late at night.

Under the guidance of two Brahmin elders every day, Dasa quickly learned the indispensable knowledge for a ruler. He participates in sacrifices, proclaims decrees, he learns horse riding and fighting skills.An elder Brahmin, Gobala, lectured him on politics.Gobala told him about the status of the three families and their privileges, pointed out the importance of identifying future heirs, and told him who belonged to his enemies.Of course, the main enemy is Nala's mother. She once took away the legal rights of Crown Prince Dasa and conspired to kill him. Now that Nala is killed, she must hate the murderer even more.

She has now fled to a neighboring country, seeking refuge there with King Govinda.She now lives in his palace.King Govinda and his family have always been dangerous enemies of the country. As early as the reign of Dasa's grandfather, they had made demands for the cession of territory and launched a war for it.Another southern neighbor, King Gabari, is just the opposite. He has always been friendly with Dasa's father, and always hates the corrupt King Nala.Visiting the king, presenting him with gifts, and inviting him to the next great hunt should be one of Dasa's top priorities.

Mrs. Pravati was evidently well adapted to the aristocratic life.She knows how to make herself look like a queen. Once she wears gorgeous clothes and glittering accessories, her graceful and luxurious appearance is amazing. It seems that she is also from the working class, and she is by no means inferior to her husband-in-law.They lived a happy love life year after year, and their happiness sprinkled a brilliant brilliance on them, making them respected and loved by the people.After Dasa had waited for a long time, Pravati finally gave birth to a beautiful boy, and Dasa's happiness was consummated.He gave the child his father's name, Ravana.Henceforth all that he possessed: his land and power, his house and stables, his cows, his flocks and his horses, all had a double meaning in his eyes, a heightened splendor and value, for he had valued Wealth is to be able to provide Pravati generously, and to please her with beautiful clothes and luxurious jewelry.Today wealth has become more lovely and more important, because it is the future legacy and happiness of the son Ravana.

Pravati had a passion for banquets and amusements of all kinds, and for all kinds of fine clothes and decorations, and to be attended by an army of servants.Dasa prefers his own garden, ordering and planting many exotic flowers and trees, and also raising parrots and other colorful birds.Feeding and talking to the birds has become part of his daily routine.In addition, he was strongly attracted by learning, and became a gracious student of the Brahmin monks.He studied hard and practiced calligraphy, and memorized countless poems and aphorisms. He also hired a master writer who could write on palm leaves and make scrolls. With the hard work of these skilled hands, Dasa built a Small library.The books are kept in a room with walls of precious wood, on which are carved sets of bas-reliefs with tales of the lives of the gods, some gilded with gold leaf.Sometimes he also invited a few Brahmin monks - the most learned thinkers and scholars among the priests - to hold discussions in this room on sacred issues. They discussed the creation of the world and the Mayan world of the great god Vishnu. , Discussing the sacred Vedas, discussing the power of sacrifice, discussing the power of repentance that is stronger than sacrifice, an ordinary person can make the gods tremble with fear before him by virtue of the power of repentance.Every Brahmin monk who participated in the meeting, who had excellent eloquence and impeccable reasoning, would receive a considerable gift, and some who won the debate even took away a beautiful cow.Occasionally there will be funny scenes here. Those great scholars who have just finished reading the aphorisms in the Vedic classics, or have just given an excellent explanation of the knowledge of the heavens and the world, will immediately boast about their knowledge. Prizes, and even jealousy of each other over these prizes, quarrels arose.

Although King Dasa had his own kingdom, his own happiness, his own garden and his own library, in the final analysis, he still found all these things in life strange and suspicious, touching and ridiculous, Just like these Brahmin monks, wise and vain, wise and stupid, respectable and contemptible. When Dasa gazed at the lotus in the pond in the garden, at the peacocks, pheasants and hornbills shining with brilliant colors, or at the gilded carvings in the palace, he often felt that these things seemed to have incredible magic. Sex, all radiate the blazing light of eternal life.But at other times, yes, even at the same time, he feels in them some unreality, some unreliability, or some problematic tendency to decline and perish, a sense of being metamorphosed into chaos. Propensity.The situation is just like him himself, first he was the son of the king, Crown Prince Dasa, then became a shepherd, became a murderer, a vagabond, and finally rose to be the king of a country, all changes were commanded and driven by some unknown under the power of.His every tomorrow and the day after tomorrow are always in an unknowable state, and even the entire human life is in an illusory and impermanent state. Nobility and poverty, eternity and death, greatness and despicableness coexist at the same time and place.Even his beloved wife, the beautiful Pravati, seemed to him from time to time unattractive and silly; too many bracelets on her arms, too smug in her eyes, and too dignified her manner Pretentious.

Dasa loves his son Ravana more than his own garden and books. In his mind, his youngest son is the consummation of his love and life, the object of his warmth and attention.Ravana was a fair and lovely boy, a true prince, with the deer eyes of his mother, and his brooding and dreamy father.Sometimes, Dasa saw the little boy standing for a long time in an ornamental tree or squatting on a carpet, or gazing intently at a stone, a carved toy, or a bird feather. Raising his eyebrows, keeping his eyes fixed, and concentrating on getting the appearance of a god, he felt that his son was very similar to himself.Dasa realized how much he loved the little boy when he had to leave his son for an indefinite amount of time for the first time.

One day, a courier with an urgent military message came in a hurry from the border area with the neighboring country, reporting that Govinda led troops to invade the country, plundered livestock, and captured some of Dasa's subjects.Without hesitation, Daza was ready to leave immediately. Moments before he led the officers of the palace guard and dozens of cavalry on horseback to drive out the invaders, when he held his youngest son in his arms and kissed him, his love for his son was like a fire. General burning pain in his heart, the power of pain was so great that Dasa was shocked, and felt as if there was a warning from somewhere reminding him.During his long journey, he kept thinking about this question and finally realized something.As he rode on his horse, he thought to himself why he was running so swiftly and swiftly into battle; what was it that compelled him to act so desperately?After thinking about it, Dasa finally realized the real reason why he was like this. In his heart, even if people and animals in the border area were plundered, even if this kind of destructive behavior damaged the authority of his royal family, it would not matter. It hurts his heart, not enough to stir up his anger and lead an expedition. For him, it may be more in line with his nature to dismiss such looting news with a sympathetic smile.However, he knew very well that it would be too unfair to do so to the messengers who risked their lives to come here; It's unfair.Yes, and all the other subjects of the land, though unscathed, would feel the same way, and they would find it hard to bear if he gave up the right to defend the land, and would not understand why their own prince should not stand up and defend the country, because, It is only right and proper for all citizens to look to the monarch for revenge and salvation in the face of violent aggression.

Dasa clearly saw that it was his bounden duty to lead the army out.But what is the responsibility?How many responsibilities we should do have been neglected by us indifferently!Why is it that the responsibility for revenge is so important that he is not allowed to be negligent?Why must he never be allowed to be lazy and half-hearted, but must do his best with all his might and enthusiasm?This question has just been formed, but he has already answered it in his heart, because the sting in his heart when he said goodbye to the little prince Ravana just now reappeared at this moment. He realized that if the king allowed the enemy to plunder the animals and the people without retaliation, the plunder and violence would increase and would advance increasingly inland from the frontiers, and the enemy would eventually stand before him, and they would As far as possible, he started where his heart hurts the most: his son.They will take his son, the heir to the throne, they will take him, and kill him, or make him suffer, which may be the most unbearable pain for him, worse than killing Pravati. For excruciating pain, yes, much deeper pain!That is why he hastened to the battle with such haste, and was so devoted to his duty as king.He was neither concerned about the loss of land and livestock, nor out of love for his subjects, nor for promoting his father's illustrious prestige, but only because of his strong love for his son that went against common sense and the intense fear of losing this child. Get unnatural fear. This is the realization he gained while riding a horse.The expedition failed to capture and punish any of Govinda's men, who had fled with their loot.In order to prove his determination and bravery, Dasa had to lead his troops across the border into a neighboring country, destroyed a village of the other side, and took away several livestock and slaves. He led the army to fight for many days, and finally returned victorious. However, on the way back to Beijing, he fell into worry again. When he returned home, he was surprisingly silent and even very sad.Because Dasa realized through contemplation that he had been completely and completely caught in a sinister net, his nature and his actions were contradictory, and he had no hope of breaking free from the net.He is partial to contemplation, he is fond of sitting and gazing, he is constantly promoting a life of inaction and innocence; on the other hand, he is full of love for Ravana, for his life and his future, and he has a This pressure forced him to take on the king's burden, yet he used this love and pressure to provoke struggles in the name of loving the country and wage wars in the name of love.He has taken actions in the name of justice to punish others. He has plundered other people's livestock, destroyed other people's villages, and captured a group of innocent and poor people with violence.There is no doubt that this action will lead to new vengeance, new violence, and so repeated vengeance that it will eventually plunge his whole life and his whole country into a constant war and violence, into a continuous battlefield.It was Dasa's insight, or perhaps his hallucination, that made him look so taciturn and sad after returning from the expedition. The fact is of course as he thought, the enemy has never allowed him to live in peace ever since.Invasions and looting happened again and again.Dasa had to lead the army to defend himself and claim compensation. If the enemy fled in defeat, he could only tolerate his subordinates hurting the opponent's civilians to vent their anger.Today, there are more and more fully armed soldiers and cavalry on the streets of the capital, and permanent border guards have been stationed in several villages in the border areas.Military meetings and preparations disrupt Dasa's peaceful life.He couldn't see the meaning and value of such endless small wars. He felt pain for the people who suffered, and he felt sad for those who gave their lives.He was deeply distressed that he had to neglect his beloved garden and books more and more, and that he had to gradually lose his peaceful life and inner peace.For this reason, Dasa often confides his heart to the Brahmin monk Gaubala, and also talks to his wife Pravati several times. Daza told them that one should invite a respected neighboring monarch to arbitrate between the belligerents, and he himself believed that he would be willing to make small concessions, such as a few pastures and villages, in order to promote peace. However, neither the elder Brahmin nor Pravati listened to his argument at all, which disappointed and annoyed Dasa. Dasa and Pravati also had a big fight because of their disagreement, and yes, it led to a breakdown in their relationship. He eagerly explained his views and ideas to her, but she felt that every word and every word seemed to be aimed at herself rather than against war and senseless killing.So she delivered a vehement tirade to him too, claiming that his idea played into the hands of the enemy, who was trying to take advantage of Dasa's softness.Yichang and his peace-loving weakness (if we don’t say that he is afraid of war), the enemy will force him to sign peace treaties one after another, and every time he signs, he will pay the price: give up some land and people, and never show up.As soon as Dasa's kingdom seemed weak, they would once again wage open war and take what was left of him.Pravati said that what is involved here is not about livestock and villages, military achievements or failures, but about the fate of the entire country, about the life and death of everyone.If Dasa did not know what is personal dignity and what is the responsibility to his son and wife, she is now willing to be his teacher.Her eyes blazed with anger, her voice trembled with anger, she had not looked so beautiful and passionate in years, yet Dasa was sad. The fighting and harassment in the border area continued, and the enemy only suffered briefly during the rainy season.At this time Dasa's court has evolved into two factions.There is a faction of peace, with very few people. Except for Dasa himself, there are only a few old Brahmin monks, all of whom are well-educated elders who are well versed in the way of meditation and meditation.On the other side, the main combat faction was headed by Pravati and Gobala, and the vast majority of Brahmin monks and all military officers were on this side.Frantic preparations for war were going on throughout the country, for it was heard that the enemy was making the same preparations.The captain of the guard taught the little prince Ravana to practice archery, while his mother led him to every military parade. During this period, Dasa would occasionally think of the forest where he stayed for a while during his escape, and think of the gray-haired hermit and his life of meditation and practice.From time to time, Dasa would feel a desire to visit the old man, to see him again, and to hear his advice to him.However, he didn't know if the old man was still alive, let alone if he was willing to listen to his talk and give him advice.However, even if the elder yogi is still alive and willing to enlighten himself, everything in the world will not go off track, and nothing will change.Contemplation and wisdom are good things, noble things, but they obviously flourish only outside of life, on the fringes of life, and if a man is swimming in the torrents of life and is wrestling with the waves, his activity and his pain are Having nothing to do with wisdom, he had to resign himself to fate, even if it was just bad luck, to do the best he could, and to resign himself to it.Even the gods in the sky do not live in eternal peace and eternal wisdom. The gods also have to face disasters and dangers, and have to fight and fight. This is also a fact he knows from countless fairy tales. So Dasa backed down.He no longer quarreled with Pravati, he rode to review the army, and saw the coming war, which he had foreseen in his exhausting nightmares, so his body became thinner and grayer, and he felt himself His happiness is about to fade away, and the joys of life will wither and dry up, leaving him only a love for the little boy. The training grows at the same time, and only the son is a fiery flower in his barren garden.He lingered and pondered, wondering how much emptiness and boredom a man could bear, how much sorrow and tedium a man could get used to, and whether a heart that seemed to have no passion could make the flowers of this worried father's love grow. Long blooming. Maybe his current life is meaningless, but it is not without a center, and his life is dominated by personal love.In the early morning, he got up for his son, and he was busy dealing with the preparations for the war that he hated in his heart throughout the day.For the sake of his son, he led a military meeting, patiently listened to the opinions of the generals of the main combat faction, and then resisted the resolution of the majority, but he could only ask everyone to at least wait patiently for changes, and not rashly risk attacking the enemy. Just as Dasa's joys, his gardens, his books became more and more estranged and strange to him, so also those who had shared his happiness and joy for many years became more and more estranged and strange to him.It started with a political disagreement, with Pravati's vehement remarks when she accused him of showing fear in the face of crime and of being peaceful, almost publicly mocking him for his cowardice; she was blushing , talking impassionedly about the dignity of the king, the heroism, the shame of toleration, etc., at that time, when he was dizzy when he heard and saw this scene, he suddenly woke up: the distance between his wife and him was gone. Very far, or it should be said that he is very far away from his wife.The rift between them had grown wider and wider since her speech, and neither man had managed to heal or stem it.Or it should be said that this is Dasa's right, because only he knows the reason of the gap best.In Dasa's imagination, this gap has increasingly become a human gap, a world-wide abyss, already lying between men and women, affirmation and negation, body and soul.When Dasa thought about his whole life, he believed that he had completely seen the reasons of everything.How Pravati had captivated his heart with her magical beauty, and she had played with him, until he had left all his companions and friends, and left the pastoral life which had so pleased him, to live in strangers for her sake. He lived a servant-like life in the middle, and became the son-in-law of a not-so-good family. They used his love to treat him like a cow and a horse. Then came Nala, and her misfortune began.Nala usurped his wife, and Nala, richly adorned, seduced his wife with his steeds, tents, costumes, and servants, probably with little effort, for the poor little girl had never seen such luxury scene.Then again - if Pravati had the virtue of fidelity of character, would she go astray so easily and quickly?In fact, Nala seduced her immediately, or took her away immediately, and put herself in the ugliest situation and suffered the most pain until then.Of course, he, Dasa, also took revenge immediately.He killed the robber who stole his happiness, and that moment also made him ecstatic with victory.However, as soon as the incident happened, he had to run away.Day by day, week by week, month by month, he had to survive in jungles and swamps, a desperado with no one to trust. And what did Pravati do during this period?The two of them barely talked about it.In any case, she did not go into exile with him.She later searched for him until she found him, just because he was born in the royal family and was about to ascend the throne, and she needed him to bring herself into the palace so that she could ascend the throne of queen.Then Pravati appeared, came to the forest and took him away from the venerable hermit.They dressed him in finery, crowned him king, and the rest was glory—but what did it really mean to him, what did he give up, and what did he gain?What he got was the honor and responsibility of the king of a country. His responsibility was very easy at first, and then it became more and more difficult and heavy.He also regained his beautiful wife, and had many sweet moments of love, and then he had a son, whose love for the boy made him increasingly apprehensive of the dangers that might threaten the life and happiness of Ravana, so that the country was now on the verge of war edge.This is what Pravati brought him when he found him by the spring.But what was he giving up and sacrificing at that time?He left the tranquility of the forest, the pious retreat, the company and study of a yogi sage, and even more so his hope of becoming the successor of that sage whom he had hoped to reach. , radiance, and unshakable peace of the soul, so as to get rid of the many contradictions and pains of life.But he was seduced by Pravati's beauty, fascinated by the net of women, and infected with her vanity, so he gave up the only way that could lead him to freedom and peace. At this moment, Dasa's life history is such a series of scenes, few of which are slightly different from the facts, and it is not difficult for people to understand, because this is an allowable change.For example, there is one obvious outlier: he was not the hermit's disciple at all, indeed, as we have seen before, he was just planning to leave the elder voluntarily.However, the backtracking after the event is often shifted due to the passing of events, which is also a common situation. Pravati's perspective on these matters is completely different from that of her husband, and she is far less good at thinking than her husband.She didn't think about Nala at all.On the contrary, she only wanted to think that she was the only one who brought good luck to Dasa and laid the foundation for his happiness, who brought him back to the throne, who bore him a son, who gave him love and happiness, and finally Only to find that he doesn't match her greatness, let alone his proud plan. Because in her eyes, the coming war can only lead to one goal: to destroy Govinda and double her power and wealth again.But Dasa never co-operated cheerfully and enthusiastically with her plans. Instead, he evaded war and conquest, not like a king, and even preferred to do nothing all day long, preferring to spend time with his flowers and trees, parrots and books.The cavalry captain Vishvamitra is a completely different type of man. He is a fanatical main combat faction. He believes that he will be able to win the upcoming war. His enthusiasm for the main battle is second only to Pravati .In her eyes, Dasa was always superior to Vishvamitra in every way. Dasa was not unaware of his wife's excessive intimacy with Vishvamitra, and she not only admired him, but also allowed herself to be admired by him, to be flattered by this brave and cheerful, perhaps a little superficial, and even not very intelligent officer, With his manly laugh, his strong and beautiful teeth, and those well-groomed beards.Daza saw this with bitterness and contempt at the same time, so he adopted a self-deceived dismissive attitude.He neither spied on them nor wanted to know if their friendship had crossed the line of what one would allow.Dasa, as he had always done with all misfortunes, looked at the love affair between Pravati and the handsome knight, and at her expression which showed that she admired him more than her unheroic husband, with habitual casual indifference. manner. It didn't matter whether it was his wife's infidelity and betrayal, or her contempt for his own meditation, it had happened and was going on, just as war and disaster were approaching him, There was nothing he could do or do about it but endure it, because the manliness and heroism of Dasa's type was to suffer, not to attack and conquer. Now, regardless of whether the mutual love between Pravati and the cavalry captain has exceeded the scope of moral permissibility, Dasa still believes that Pravati is less guilty than himself.He, Dasa, was a thinker and a skeptic, and he naturally knew how to blame Pravati for the loss of happiness, or think that she should bear some responsibility.Anyway, the reason he fell into this trap of love, ambition, revenge and plunder was Pravati.Whenever Dasa thought about it from this angle, he also blamed love, blamed women, and blamed sexual pleasure that was responsible for everything in the world, and also blamed the whole singing and dancing, and the whole sensuality-indulgence in lust. , adultery, suicide, murder, until war.However, in the process of associating, he also clearly realized that Pravati was not guilty, nor the cause of the disaster, but a victim, because neither her beauty nor Dasa's love for her was caused by her. Self-inflicted, of course, is beyond reproach.In fact, she is but a speck in the sun's beams, a wave in the rolling river.For Dasa, getting rid of women and love, getting rid of pleasure and vanity is exactly what he should accomplish by himself.Either he stays with the herds as a happy and content shepherd, or he overcomes unimaginable obstacles and embarks on the mystical path to yoga. He Dasa himself neglected himself, he himself gave up on himself, he did not respond to the call to be great, or rather he failed to be faithful to his mission, so that in the end he gave his wife a legitimate right: her husband was just a coward in her eyes .In addition, she also gave him a son, this beautiful and delicate boy, he was afraid of this boy, restless day and night, but this also gave his existence meaning, added value to his life, yes , In fact, it is also a kind of great happiness, a kind of happiness that is indeed painful and frightening, but it is still a kind of happiness, which belongs to him completely.Now he has to pay the price for this happiness, the pain and bitterness in his heart, his determination to go to the battlefield to die, and his willingness to consciously tend to the fate of death. At this time, King Govinda of the neighboring country was listening to the instigation and instigation of the slain mother of Nala. It's getting more and more shameless.Only by forming an alliance with the powerful neighboring King Gabari could Dasa be strong enough to keep the peace and force Govinda to sign a treaty of good neighborliness.But this Gabari king, though fond of Dasa, was also a relation of Govinda's, and therefore always politely rejected Dasa's every attempt to beg him for an alliance.Things have developed to this point, and there is no way to escape, and the hope of maintaining stability in the name of reason or humanity has also been shattered, and the doomed end is getting closer, so we can only bear it.Then even Dasa himself almost longed for war.Since things are inevitable, let the long-standing thunder and lightning burst out quickly, and the disaster that should come comes quickly. Dasa visited King Gabari again, but it was only in vain. King Gabari politely persuaded him to be temperate and patient, but this attitude was useless.There is only one question left to discuss, how to deal with armed attacks.Opinions differ only on whether to respond immediately to the next attack of the enemy, or to wait for the main force of the enemy to attack before reacting, so that the neutral people of the world can see who is the culprit for breaking the peace . On the other hand, the enemy did not consider these issues at all, neither discussed nor hesitated.One day Govinda finally went on the offensive.Govinda directed a large-scale attack in disguise, luring Dasa to lead the cavalry captain and his elite troops to gallop to the front line of the border immediately. While they were still on the way, Govinda led the main force into the country. Captured Dasa's capital gate and surrounded the palace.As soon as Dasa heard that he had hit the trick, he immediately returned to the capital.He knew that his wife and son were besieged in the palace, and the streets and alleys of the whole city were fighting bloody battles. When he thought that his relatives and people were all in danger, he couldn't help feeling like a knife was piercing his heart.So he was no longer a war-weary and prudent commander. His anger and pain burned his heart, and he drove his soldiers back to the capital frantically. When he found that fierce fighting was going on in the streets and alleys of the city, he broke through the siege and rushed into the palace. Fighting against the enemy like a madman, he fought bloody for a whole day, until at dusk he was exhausted and finally collapsed, with many wounds on his body gurgling blood. When Dasa regained consciousness, he found himself a prisoner.This war has been lost.His country, his capital and palace have all fallen into enemy hands.He was brought bound before King Govinda, who, after greeting him wryly, led him into a room in the palace where Dasa kept his books, and the walls were adorned with gilded bas-reliefs , The room is full of hand-copied scriptures.Sitting upright on a carpet in the room was his wife, Pravati, with a livid face, and behind her stood several armed guards.In her arms lay their son. His frail body was like a broken stem of a flower. His small face was gray and dull. The boy was dead, and his clothes were soaked in blood.When Dasa was brought in, the woman didn't even turn her head, she didn't glance at him, she just stared at the small corpse with a blank expression.But Dasa felt that there was some strange change in her body, and it took a while before he realized the reason. Pravati's jet-black hair, which was so black and shiny when he saw it a few days ago, is now almost Grayed out.Pravati had been sitting upright for a long time, with the boy still lying in her arms, and she stared at him with a blank expression on her face like a mask. "Ravana!" Dasa cried, "Ravana, my child, my darling!" He knelt down, bowed his face to the boy's head, and knelt as if in prayer, before the silent woman and the silent woman. Before the dead child, condolences to both, salute to both, he smelled blood and corpses, mingled with the scent of the boy's hair smeared with fragrant ointment. Pravati stared blankly at the father and son with dull eyes. Someone touched the shoulder of Dasa, one of Govinda's henchmen, ordered him to stand up, and led him away.达萨没有对普拉华蒂说过一句话，她也没有对他说过一个字。 达萨被捆绑着送上一辆囚车，抵达戈文达国都后又被关进了一座监狱，有人替他解开了部分镣铐，一个士兵拿来一壶水，放在他身前的石板地上，人们关上囚室门，上了锁，只剩下他孤零零一个人。达萨肩上的一个伤口火辣辣地灼痛。他摸索到那壶水，湿润了双手和脸部。他当然很想喝水，却克制注了，他暗暗思忖，这样可以死得快些。他还要等待多久呢，还要多久呢！达萨渴求死亡，就像他干燥的喉咙渴求饮水一样。唯有死亡才可能了结他内心的苦难，才可能熄灭自己心里那幅母子受难的图像。然而，在他集人间痛苦于一身之际，虚弱和疲倦向他施加恩惠，让他倒下身子迷迷糊糊地睡着了。 他只是打了一个吨儿，很快就从瞌睡状态中清醒了，他想举手揉揉眼睛，却办不到，因为两只手都没有空，双手正紧紧握着什么东西。他努力振作精神，使劲大睁双目，蓦然发现四周并没有什么牢墙，却是亮得耀眼的绿色光线，在树叶和苔藓上流动不停。他眨巴着眼睛好一忽儿，只觉得那绿光好像在无声无息而很剧烈地一下一下抽打着自己，他感到一阵恐惧的震颤穿过颈项直贯背脊，他又眨巴起眼睛来，脸容扭歪了，眼睛睁得大大的呆住了。 他正站在一座森林里，双手紧紧握着一只盛满清水的水瓢。在他脚下，一道泉水注成的池塘亮晶晶地闪着棕色、绿色的斑驳色彩。这地方让他记起羊齿植物丛林后边的茅屋，想起在那里等待他取水回去的瑜伽长老。是的，当这位老人派他取水，而他请求对方略略讲解玛雅世界的时候，老人脸上的笑容何等奇怪。 达萨既没有打过仗，也没有丧失过儿子，他也没有当过国王，做过父亲，是瑜伽老人满足了他的愿望，向他展示了玛雅世界的真谛：皇宫和花园，阅读书籍和饲养鸟类，国王的忧虑和父亲的爱心，战争和野心，对普拉华蒂的爱恋和强烈猜疑- -所有的一切，都是虚无——不，不是虚无，而是玛雅，这就是玛雅世界的图景！ 达萨震惊地站停了，泪水布满了他的脸颊。达萨两手颤抖着，晃动了他刚刚替隐士盛满的水瓢，水溢出瓢边溅落到脚上。达萨觉得好像有人砍断了他的一条腿，又从他脑子里挖走了一些东西，突然间，他经历过的漫长岁月，他珍爱过的种种宝贵物件，他享受过的种种欢乐，他忍受过的无数痛苦，他承受过的无比恐惧，他曾亲自品尝的濒临死亡般的绝望感——统统都被人取走了，消灭了，化为了乌有，然而，却并非化为乌有！因为，记忆依然存在，所有的景象仍然留存在他的心头。他依然看见普拉华蒂庄重、直挺挺地坐在那里，头上是忽然变得灰白的长发，怀里躺着她已死的儿子，似乎是她刚刚亲手杀了他一般，男孩横在她膝上就像一头野兽，四肢软软地耷拉着，又好像在轻轻晃动。 啊，他获得的玛雅世界体验是多么的快速，简直快得惊人，又多么的恐怖啊！ 世上的一切对他而言都是可以被任意挪动推移的，许多年的经历皱缩成了短短的瞬间，无数杂沓纷繁的现实景象转眼间化为了一场春梦。也许，以往发生在他身上的一切经历，也仅仅是梦里的故事吧：他是国王的儿子达萨，他的牧牛生活，他的婚姻，他对纳拉的报复，他避居在瑜伽老人的隐修地。——所有这一切，难道都是画上的图景，如同人们在宫殿墙上雕刻出的壁画中所见，人们看见了花卉、星星、鸟儿、猴子，还看见了诸神，一切都栩栩如生，活动于翠绿的树枝树叶间，却毕竟不是现实，不过是些绘出的幻象。如此说来，他此时此刻所感受的一切，所见到的一切，他从自己荣登国王宝座——到参加战争——到被囚狱中——这一场梦中醒来，直到他站在这一汪泉水之畔，手握这刚刚被摇晃出一点儿泉水的水瓢，连同他目前脑海里涌现的思想，——一切的一切，归根结蒂莫不诞生于同一来源，构成于同一材料，难道不皆是春梦、幻象、玛雅世界么？那么，他未来还必须经历的一切，还得亲眼去观看，亲手去尝试的一切，直至他的肉体生命结束——难道和过去的一切有什么不同，不论在性质或在形式上有什么区别么？一切莫不是游戏和虚假现象，泡影和梦幻，一切莫不归属于玛雅世界——人生的全部美好和恐怖，欢乐和绝望的画面，连同那燃烧般的狂喜和火燎般的灼痛。 达萨始终呆呆地站着不动，好像麻痹了，失去了知觉。他又晃了一下手里的水瓢，水溅出瓢边，再次浸凉了他的脚趾，流失在地里。他该做什么呢？把水瓢重新盛满，送还给瑜伽僧人，让他把自己梦中遭受的诸多苦难大大嘲笑一番？这么做对他可毫无吸引力。达萨垂下手里的水瓢，倒尽了水，把水瓢丢在苔藓上。然后，他坐下身子，开始在碧绿的苔藓地上进行严肃的思索。他已经做梦做够了，做得太多了，这一连串由经历、欢乐以及令人心寒血凝的痛苦所交融而成的疯狂般的恶梦实在让他厌倦了，因为它们顷刻间便在猛醒中化为了玛雅世界，让他知道自己不过是一个傻呆的愚人而已。他已受够所有的一切。他已不再渴望妻子，甚至不再渴望儿子，他也已不想要什么王位，要什么胜利或者复仇，更不再向往幸福或者智慧，权力或者美德了。他已只是渴求静谧，寻求终结，他已不希望出现任何其他情景，除去制止这种永恒转动的人生轮回，停息这无穷无尽的人生画面，除了熄灭而外，他已别无祈求。他但求消灭自己、让自己永远静息，这不正是自己投入那场最后战斗时所希望的吗？当时他冲入包围圈，扑向敌人，见人就杀，也不怕被人所杀，他伤害别人，也被别人所伤，直至精疲力竭倒下，他想望的不正是这样让自己消亡么？ 然而，后来又会是什么情况呢？你会昏厥片刻，或者稍稍打一个小盹儿，或者甚至死亡一回。与此同时，你会再一度醒过来，不得不让生命的激流再次流入你的心里，重新听任那一幅幅时而可怖，时而可喜，又时而可厌的生活图像潮水般姿意流淌，无穷无尽，连续不断，无可回避地流进你的眼帘，直至你再度丧失知觉，直至你又死亡一次。这也许是赋予你一个休息的机会，一种短暂的、极微量的小憩，可以长长的舒一口气，不过，轮子随即又继续转动了，于是你又跌进了滚滚红尘，又成为千万个人形中的一个形象，又继续跳起了时而放荡不羁，时而狂喜陶醉，时而又悲观绝望的生命之舞蹈。啊，世上根本不存在熄灭，生命的轮回永无尽头。 满心的焦虑驱使达萨又迈开了前进的步伐。既然这场该诅咒的人生环形舞蹈没有静止之时，既然自己目前唯一的渴求平静愿望无法实现，那么，他现在重新把水瓢装满泉水，再去见那位打发他跑去取水的老人，也可能与其他行动相比是一样的好事。尽管这位老人并无任何权利向他发号施令。这件事不过是别人烦请他帮忙的一项服务工作，也算是一种委托吧，他为何不肯听从，不去执行呢。这总比呆呆坐着，苦苦思索着自我毁灭方法要强得多。是的，总而言之，服从和服务较之统治和指挥，是远为轻松、舒服，又远为无辜和无害的事情，这是他了解得非常清楚的事实。好了，达萨，拿起水瓢，满满盛足水，送到师父那里去吧！ 当他走进茅屋时，师父用一种特别的眼光迎接他，那目光既有询问，又半带同情和逗乐的表情-一就像一个较年长的孩子望着一个刚刚经历过某件既费力又多少令人害臊的冒险，或者刚刚经受过一次勇气测验的小弟弟一样。这位王子兼牧人，这个但求一席栖身之地的可怜的青年，确实只是到泉水边去了一次，离开不足一刻钟时间；然而，他无论如何也同时是从一座监狱中出来，已经失去一个妻子、一个儿子以及整整一个王国。他已经过完一场普通人生，已经亲眼望见了转动不止的轮回人生，尽管只有短短一瞥。这位年轻人大概从前也曾有过觉醒，有过一次，甚至是多次的觉醒，曾经呼吸到静修的真正气息，否则便不可能在这里逗留如此长久。 是的，现在他显然是名副其实地真正觉醒了，已经成熟到可以迈上修行的漫长道路。 这个年轻人单是学会正确掌握瑜伽的姿势和呼吸，就得付出许多年光阴。 老人就用这种目光，一种显示善意关怀和表明师徒关系业已建立的脸部迹象，完成了瑜伽大师接纳弟子的过程。这一目光不仅驱除了青年弟子头脑里的妄念，也替他定下了服务的秩序。关于达萨的生活已无可叙述，因为他今后的一切已属于在另一世界展开的图像和故事。达萨从此再也没有离开这座森林。