Chapter 24 Chapter Twenty-Three

People are not right.Time is not a cure for all wounds.On the contrary, it is the executioner who ravages and destroys youth.Winter comes and summer goes, every season, a batch of new blood enters Hollywood.Those people hitchhiked, took motorcycles, trains or planes to come here one after another, scrambling to be the first.They were all young girls of eighteen, just as Jill had been.They all have slender legs, walk lightly, and their faces are young and fresh, looking so innocent and enthusiastic.Pretty smile, very charming.With each batch, Jill grew a year older.One day, she saw herself in the mirror.Yes, this is already 1964.She is twenty-five years old.

In the beginning, the experience of taking pornography has always made her terrified.For a long time she was afraid that the director who sent her the role would find out and cut her off.But as the weeks passed and the months passed, Jill gradually forgot her fears.However, she has changed.Year after year, the years have left deep marks on her body, like the annual rings of a big tree.Her heart also became hard as a stone.She began to hate all those who refused to give her the chance to act, hated those who didn't mean anything. She worked endlessly tedious, unappreciated chores: she worked as a secretary, receptionist, fast-food cook, babysitter, model, restaurant server, telephone operator, and salesperson.All for the sake of someone coming to summon her someday.

But no one came, and Jill felt more and more painful.She also sometimes went to be an extra or a small role with only one line, but there was no progress. She looked at herself in the mirror and felt the message of Old Man Time: it is time to speed up.Whenever she sees her own face, memories of the past rush to her mind.She can't forget the unforgettable sun and moon.Seven long years ago, when she first came to Hollywood, she was such a young, pretty girl.But how much of this little girl's shadow is left on her now?Tiny wrinkles had crept up the corners of the little girl's eyes, and the line from the nostrils to the chin was even deeper.These wrinkles are imprints of struggling with countless difficulties and failures, and they are also warnings to her that the years are passing.Tell her that she has not yet seized the opportunity to succeed.Hurry up, Jill, hurry up!

So when an eighteen-year-old Fox assistant director, Fred Clapp, told Jill that if she could sleep with him he could give her a good part, Jill said yes. While Fred Clapp was having lunch, she went to find him at the factory. "I only have half an hour," he said, "let me think about where we can find a quiet place." He frowned and thought for a while, then said cheerfully: "Go to the dubbing studio and talk to I come." The Dubbing Room is a small, soundproof projection room.There people combine everything on the tape into one film. Fred Clapp looked at the empty room. "Fart! There's a couch here," he said, looking at his watch. "We'll just have to do this, take off your clothes, beauty. The dubbing crew will be up in twenty minutes."

Jill stares at him for a moment, feeling like a whore.And she hates him.However, she didn't let it show.She has tried to follow her own way of life, but failed.So now she had to do it their way, and she took off her clothes. Jill wanted to find a place to lean on around.In front of her was a sound system—an automatic control machine on wheels.In the audio system, there are audio tapes recording various laughter.As long as you press the button of the body, you can make a laughing sound. "Go ahead, get down!" Jill hesitated for a moment, then got down on the stomach.She supported her body with her hands...

He raped her savagely.She lost her balance and reached for something on the controller, her fingers touching the buttons.Suddenly the room was filled with laughter.Jill was tossing in excruciating pain.Her hand was just on the button.A woman giggled, a handful of people laughed, a girl giggled, and a hundred or so people laughed at some nasty obscenity.Jill screamed in pain, but the echo in the room was hysterical and weird. The laughter slowly died away.Jill closed her eyes and lay still on her stomach, struggling painfully until she was able to straighten up at last and turn her face away.Then Fred Clapura zipped up the front of his trousers.

"You're so nasty, beauty, and your screams really set me on fire." Jill wondered what kind of beast he would be when he was nineteen. He said to Jill, "Go wash up and go to rehearsal room 12 over there. You have been working since this afternoon." With this first experience, it will be easier later on.Jill started working regular hours at various studios: Warner Bros., Paramount, MGM, Universal, Columbia, Fox.In fact, she goes to every house except Disney, where there is no sex problem. Jill and the people who offered the roles—assistant directors, directors, and producers—have fun, and the small price they pay is for her to play the part.She is famous in Hollywood city, and many people want to get their hands on it.She keeps them satisfied.Every time she does this, the self-esteem and self-love in her heart will decrease, and the hatred and pain will increase.

She didn't know how to do it, and she didn't know when, but she knew that one day the city would pay the price for the humiliation and ravages she suffered. Over the next few years, Jill appeared in dozens of movies, television and commercials.She played the secretary who said, "Good morning, Mr. Stephens".She's played the babysitter and said, "Don't worry about it now. You two can have a good night. I'll put the baby to bed." She's also played the elevator driver and said, "The sixth floor is down." Through the product advertiser wearing ski suits, people believe: "My girlfriends all use Dan Tess cosmetics." However, no miracle happened.She's still just an unnamed face in the extras.She's in the movie business, but she's not.She couldn't allow herself to live like this for the rest of her life.

Jill's mother died in 1966.Jill drove to Odessa to attend the funeral.The funeral was held in the late afternoon.Only four or five people came.Over the years, none of the wives from the families where her mother worked had come.There were also several worshipers who often came to pray, including revivalist believers who advocated the last judgment.Jill still remembered how frightened she had been at the congregation of the cultists.But Jill's mother always found comfort in these ceremonies, in the belief that her tormentors had been driven away. A familiar voice whispered, "Hello, Josephine." She turned, and he was standing beside her, and she looked into his eyes as if they had never been apart.She was still his, and he was still hers.A few years have made his face more mature, and the beard on his cheeks is a bit gray.But he hasn't changed, he's still David.his david.However, the two are like passers-by...

He was saying, "I am deeply saddened to learn that Lingtang has passed away." She heard herself reply, "Thank you, David." They are like reading dialogue from a play. "I have to talk to you. Can you meet me tonight?" There was an urgent pleading in his voice. She thought of the last time they were together, of his hungering demands, of his promises, of those dreams.She said, "Okay, David." "How about the lake? Do you have a car?" She nodded. "I'll see you in an hour." Sasse was standing in front of the mirror, naked, about to change for a dinner party.Then David came home.He went into her bedroom.Standing there watching her.He can examine his wife with complete indifference because he feels he has no feelings for her.she is pretty.She pays close attention to her body.Through diet adjustment and moderate exercise, her figure is still impeccable.This is her capital.David had reason to believe that he shared this capital with others—her golf coach, her ski teacher, her flying teacher.But David couldn't blame her because he hadn't slept with Sasse in a long time.

At first he really believed that Sasse would divorce him when his mother died.But David's mother was still alive, and alive and well.David couldn't figure out whether he was deceived or a miracle happened.A year after their marriage, David once said to Sasse, "I think we should talk about divorce." Sasse said, "Divorce for what?" When she saw the astonished look on his face, she laughed. Would give you up to that little Polish whore?" He slapped her across the face. He went to his lawyer the next day.When David had finished, the lawyer said, "I can get you a divorce. But if Sasse hangs on to you, David, you'll have to pay a terrible price." "Do it for me." After receiving notice of the divorce proceedings, Sasse locked herself in David's bathroom and swallowed a large number of sleeping pills.As a result, it took David and the two servants a lot of effort to pry open the thick door.Sasse struggled on the death line for two days.When David went to visit her in the hospital where she was staying, "I'm sorry, David!" she said, "I don't want to live without you, that's what it is." The next morning, he withdrew his suit for divorce. That was almost ten years ago.David's marriage has been in an uneasy truce.He has completely taken over the Kennivan "empire", running it with all his energies.In order to run this "empire", he traveled all over the world's major cities.Everywhere he had bought girls for his physical comfort.But he never forgot Josephine. David didn't know what she thought of him.He wanted to know, but he was afraid of the truth.She has every reason to hate him.When he learned of the death of Josephine's mother, he went to the funeral hall just to see Josephine.As soon as he saw her, he knew nothing had changed.He has not changed, how many years have passed.The past remains the same.He still loves her just as much as before. I have to talk to you... meet me tonight... ok david... "By the lake." Sasse saw David looking at her in the wall mirror and turned. "You'd better change quickly, David. We're going to be late." "I'm going to meet Josephine. If she wants me, I'll marry her. I think this farce is over, isn't it?" She stood there, staring at him blankly.Her naked body was reflected in the mirror. "Let me get dressed first," she said. David nodded and left the room.He walked into the spacious living room, paced up and down, and prepared to confront her further.Surely, after so many years, Sasse would not want to rely on this vain marriage.Besides, he can give her everything she wants. He heard the crank of Sasse's car, and then the squeaking of its tires against the curb as the car lurched and sprinted out of his driveway.David rushed to the front door and looked out.Sasse's Maserati was speeding down the road.David got into his car, slammed it on, and sprinted out of the driveway. When David reached the road, he saw her car had just disappeared from sight in the distance.He stepped on the gas pedal.But Sasse's Maserati was faster than David's Rolls-Royce.David chased desperately, accelerating: 70...80...90.But her car has disappeared without a trace. l00...l10... still can't see her car. David drove the car up a small hill.There he saw Sasse's car in the distance like a small toy car.At this time, her car was turning sharply. Due to the high speed, the body was tilted to one side, and the wheels on the other side had already left the ground.The Maserati jerked and wobbled, and as soon as it turned the corner, the car lost control, shot up the side of the road, then shot into the air like a projectile, then flipped twice in the field. No sooner had David pulled Sasse's unconscious body out of the car than the cracked cylinder exploded. The chief of surgery came out of the operating room and said to David, "She's not going to die." It was six o'clock the next morning. Jill was at the lake before the sun went down.She parked the car near the water and turned off the engine.She leisurely listened to the gusts of evening wind and the soft sounds in the sky in the afterglow of the setting sun. "I don't know when I have been so happy before," she thought.Then she corrects herself. "Yes, here, with David." She remembered how he felt when he was on top of her.She was paralyzed with longing.Now, all obstacles to their happy union were gone.As soon as she saw David, she realized: he still loved her, and she knew it. She watched the blood-red sun slowly sinking into the distant lake.It was completely dark.She hoped that David would come soon. An hour passed, and then two hours.The air cooled down.Jill sat quietly in the car, looking at the bright moon hanging high in the night sky, emitting pale silver light.She listened carefully to the slightest noise around her in the silent night, and she would say to herself, "Here comes David." Jill sat there until early morning.Until dawn the sun rises from the horizon again.She started the car and went straight back to Hollywood.