1 She let out a cry. "What's the matter?" he asked. The blinds in the room were closed, so the light was dim, but the expression of fear on her face could still be seen clearly. "Someone opened the door just now." "Well, it's probably a maid, or some boy servant." "They never come at this time. They all know I'm going to bed after lunch." "Who else would it be?" "It's Walter," she whispered, her lips trembling. She pointed to his shoes.He went to put on his shoes, but his nerves were somewhat tense, which made him look clumsy, and the shoelaces were tied.She sighed impatiently, and came up to put the shoes on him.She put on her robe without a word, and walked barefoot to the dressing table.Her hair was matted, and she picked up the comb and combed it.When she finished combing, his second shoe had just been put on.She handed him the coat.

"How do I go?" "It's better to wait first. I'll take a look outside. You can go out if you have nothing to do." "It can't be Walter. He won't leave the laboratory until five o'clock." "Who else would it be?" Now they are almost whispering.She kept shaking.He suddenly felt that if something happened, she would go crazy.He blamed her again, according to the current situation, where is it as safe as she said?She held her breath and took his arm.He followed her look.In front were the windows leading into the corridor, all with shutters, and the shutters were closed.However, the white ceramic knob on the window handle turns slowly.They didn't hear anyone walking down the corridor.Now the knob turned so silently that they almost jumped.A minute passed without any movement.Then, the white ceramic knob of the other window turned quietly, as if by a ghost.Katie finally couldn't stand the shock and opened her mouth to scream.He quickly covered her mouth and suppressed the cry.

The room fell silent.She leaned against him, knees shaking.He worried that she would pass out soon.He frowned, gritted his teeth, and carried her to the bed.Her face was as white as a sheet.Although his face was tanned, it was still pale at this moment.He stood beside her, his eyes fixed on the ceramic knob like a fascination.No one spoke.Then she cried again. "For heaven's sake, don't do it," he whispered anxiously. "When it comes, let it come. We've got to hang on." She looks for her handkerchief.He read her mind and handed her the bag. "Where's your sun hat?"

"I forgot downstairs." "Ugh, my God!" "Listen to me, cheer up. I'm sure it's not Walter. Why should he be back at this hour? He never came home at noon, did he?" "right." "I'll bet anything, it's a servant." She smiled.His voice was firm and kind, and she was relieved.She took his hand and held it tenderly.He waited for her to regain her composure. "Look at me, we can't stay here forever," he said, "now you think you can go out in the hallway?" "I don't think I can stand up yet."

"Have you any brandy here?" She shook her head.He frowned, his heart gradually became irritable, and he didn't know what to do.She grasped his hand suddenly. "What if he's still there?" He made himself smile again, and resumed the soft, caring, persuasive tone of voice whose effect there was no doubt about. "No. Pull yourself up, Katie. Think about it, it won't be your husband's. If he comes in, sees a hat he hasn't seen before in the hall, comes upstairs and finds your room locked." , must have yelled. It must have been done by the servants. Nobody but the Chinese would come up and twist the handle like that."

She was much calmer indeed. "But even being a maid isn't necessarily a good thing." "That's nothing to worry about. If it doesn't work, I will scare her with God. Government officials don't have a lot of power, but they can manage things after all." He must be right.She stood up and held out her arms to him.He took her in his arms and kissed her on the lips.She was ecstatic, almost pained in her heart.She adores him.He let her go, and she went to the window, unlatched the bolt, parted the shutters, and looked out.Not a single shadow.She crept up the corridor and looked into her husband's dressing-room, then her own, which was empty.She went back to the bedroom and waved to him.

"no one." "I knew it was nothing at first." "Don't laugh. I'm freaking out. Go sit down in my living room. I'll put my stockings and shoes on first." 2 He did as she said.She came back five minutes later.He is smoking a cigarette. "I said, can I have some brandy and soda?" "Well, I'll call." "I said today's incident didn't really scare you." They were all silent again, waiting for the boy servant to answer the phone.After the call was connected, she ordered what he wanted. "You call the lab and ask if Walter is there," she said after a moment, "they can't tell who you are."

He picked up the receiver and asked for her number.He asked Dr. Fein if he could answer the phone.After a while he put down the receiver. "He's gone after lunch," he told her. "Ask the boy later if Walter has been here." "I dare not. If he has been here, I have not seen him. Isn't it ridiculous?" The boy servant came with a drink, and Tang Sheng drank it himself.Then he asked her if she wanted a drink too, and she shook her head. "What if it's really Walter?" she asked. "Or maybe he doesn't care at all." "Walter doesn't care?"

Her tone was clearly disbelieving. "He's an overly shy guy, I'm impressed with that. Some men don't show up, you know. He's well aware that it's no good for anyone to make a scandal. I still don't think that's Walter, but even if it was, I don't think he'll do anything about it. I think he'll forget about it." She thought for a while. "He loves me deeply." "Well, it's better that way. You can just convince him that he believes in you." The charming smile she couldn't resist appeared on his face again.His smile was first hidden in his clear blue eyes, and then slowly revealed on his beautiful and well-shaped mouth.He has small, neat, white teeth.It was a sensual smile that melted her heart and soul.

"I don't really care," she said, with a sudden joy in her heart. "It's worth it." "It's my fault." "Why did you come? I was shocked to see you here." "I can not hold it in." "Dear." She leaned a little closer to him, her black eyes were shining brightly, she looked at him enthusiastically, and her lips were slightly parted.He put his arms around her.She gasped happily and fell into his arms. "Remember you can always count on me," he said. "I'm really, really happy with you. I wish you were like me."

"You're not scared at all?" "I hate Walter," she replied. He didn't know how to respond to her, so he kissed her again.Her face touched his face softly. Then he raised her wrist and looked at the little gold watch on her wrist. "Guess what I'm supposed to do now?" "Slip away?" she said with a smile. He nodded.She hugged him tighter, but felt he was determined to go, and let him go. "It's not shy to quit work like you. I won't be with you anymore." He never misses an opportunity to tease. "It seems that you are eager to get rid of me immediately." He said softly. "You know, I don't want you to go." Her voice was low and deep, but clearly serious.He understood what she meant and could only smile. "Don't pay too much attention to this mysterious person who came today. I guarantee that he is a servant. Even if he is not, I will help you." "How much experience do you have?" He smiled happily and proudly. "Not much, but to put it bluntly, I have enough brains." 3 She followed him into the corridor and watched him walk out of the house.He waved at her, which gave her a thrill.He was forty-one years old, but his body was still very flexible, and his feet were nimble like a young man. They did do stupid things this afternoon, but if he wanted her to, how could she care to be careful?He had come to her two or three times already, after lunch, when no one was too lazy to walk in the sun, not even the boys had noticed him.It is always so difficult for them to communicate in Hong Kong.She didn't like this Chinese city, and she couldn't help being nervous whenever she came to the squalid little house on Victoria Road where they used to meet.It was an antique shop, and the Chinese people sitting around in the shop stared at her disgustingly; He ran up the dark stairs and opened the door for her.The room was dirty and untidy, and the big wooden bed against the wall made her shudder. "It's filthy in here, don't you think?" she said when she first met Charlie here. "Not when you come in," he replied. Of course, none of that mattered when he pulled her into his arms. Alas, she was not free at all, and neither was he, what a chagrin.She doesn't like his wife.For a moment Kitty's thoughts fell to Dorothy Townsend.How unfortunate to be called Dorothy!From the name, you can guess how old a person is.She is at least thirty-eight years old.But Charlie never mentioned her.Of course he didn't take her to heart at all, she was boring and annoying, and it was too late for him to run away.But he is a gentleman.A sardonic, loving smile crossed Katie's face: this was him, a well-reserved fool--who cheated on Dorothy without saying a word to make her disappointment.Dorothy was a taller woman, taller than Katie, neither fat nor thin, with dull brown hair.She probably never had the word "cute" in her head, except for the little bit of loveliness that everyone had in her as a young woman.She had good features, but she was by no means beautiful.She has blue eyes, but they are cold.You have no interest in looking at her skin once, and there is no luster on her cheeks.And her attire—well, it does not match her identity—the wife of the Assistant Chief Secretary of Hong Kong.Katie smiled and shrugged her shoulders a little. Of course no one could deny that Dorothy Townsend had a pleasant-sounding voice.She was also a good mother, Charlie often said that, and she was what Katie's mother called a lady.Katie didn't like her, however.She didn't like her absent-minded manner.If she buys you a cup of tea or dinner, her etiquette will be so elaborate that you will think she treats you like an outsider.Katie feels the only thing she cares about is her children: she has two sons who are still at school in England, and a six-year-old who she wants to bring back next year.Her face was really just a mask.She smiles at people and speaks elegantly, which is in line with her identity, but it gives people a feeling of repelling people thousands of miles away.She had a circle of intimate friends in the colony, and they undoubtedly all held her in high esteem.Katie wondered if Mrs. Townsend thought her origins too ordinary.She couldn't help blushing.However, her ordinary background saved Katie from putting on airs everywhere.It is undeniable that Dorothy's father was once the governor of the colony, and the natural beauty during his reign-everyone stood up when he first entered the room, and all the gentlemen took off their hats when he drove away-but what could be better than What could be more insignificant than a retired colonial governor?Dorothy Townsend's father now lives on a pension in a small house at the Earl's Court.Katie's mother would never have asked her daughter to visit her, it was boring to be with her daughter.Katie's father, Bernard Justin, is a British royal counselor and is expected to become a judge in the near future.They live in South Kensington. Katie came to Hong Kong with her husband, only to find out that her social status is actually closely related to her husband's occupation after arriving here, which made it difficult for her to accept for a while.Everyone was friendly to them, and for two or three months, they were invited to evening parties almost every day.In the governor's mansion, the governor received her like a bride.But she quickly learned that, as the wife of a government-employed bacteriologist, no one really took her seriously.It made her feel aggrieved. Just three months into their married life, she knew she had made a mistake.But it would be more appropriate to say that her mother was the culprit. There was a photograph of her mother in the room, and Katie's weary eyes fell right on top of it.She wondered why she had put it there, she didn't like her mother that much.She also had a photograph of her father, downstairs on the cover of the grand piano.It was taken when he was hired as QC, so it shows him in a wig and robe.But even so, his image is still difficult to radiate some brilliance.He was short and thin, with tired eyes and thin lips with a long upper lip.The amusing photographer told him to smile, but he looked more serious.Mrs. Justin thought that the corners of his mouth turned back and his downcast eyes just showed a calm and introverted air, which gave people a sense of justice and strictness.Therefore, this one was selected from many alternative photos.The picture of Mrs Justin herself was taken when her husband was invited into the palace after he was promoted to royal counsel.She looked extremely graceful and luxurious in a velvet dress, and the long skirt showed her nobility and elegance.She wears feathers on her head, holds flowers in her hands, and her body is straight.She was a slim, flat-chested woman of fifty, with prominent cheekbones and a high bridge of the nose.Her hair is still not thinning, black and smooth.Katie had always suspected that her mother's hair was specially retouched, if not dyed.Her beautiful brown eyes, which never rested on anything, were without a doubt her most striking feature.If you were lucky enough to talk to her for a moment, you must have been terrified by her darting, uncertain eyes.Her face is expressionless, with smooth, sallow skin, and those eyes are moving all over you, between you and the others in the room.You will feel that her eyes are finding fault with you and drawing conclusions about you. At the same time, she does not let go of what is happening in every corner, and what comes out of her mouth is probably what she thinks in her heart. There is no connection at all. Mrs. Justin is a sarcastic woman, dominating, ambitious, mean, and stupid.She was one of five daughters of a Liverpool lawyer who met Bernard Justin at the Northern Circuit Court.At that time, he was in the prime of life and his career was booming, and her father predicted that he would have a bright future.In the end, however, he hesitated.He was hardworking, resilient, talented, but unmotivated.Mrs. Justin had great contempt for him.But she had to admit sourly that she could only rely on him for her success, so she tried every means to force him to use him for herself.She babbled in his ear without mercy.She saw that if there was something entrusted to him that he didn't intend to do, as long as he kept talking so that he would have no peace, when he was physically and mentally exhausted, he would obediently surrender.She took pains to find anyone she could use.She flattered and fawned on lawyers who could introduce her husband's cases, and became intimately acquainted with her wife.She flattered judges and judges' wives to the utmost, and took great pains in promising new political stars. For twenty-five years, none of the guests Mrs. Justine had invited to her house had been honored by her personal favour.Every once in a while she will hold a grand dinner party.Yet her stinginess is no less than her ambition.She hated spending money, and boasted that she could hold the same luxurious party with only half the money.Her family's dinner parties were long, varied and frugal, and she was confident that her guests would pay no attention to what they were drinking while they ate their entrees and talked about it.She wrapped the Moselle bottle in a napkin, thinking her guests would drink it like champagne. Bernard Justin's business was fine, but far from full of customers.Many rising stars have already surpassed him.So Mrs. Justin asked him to stand for parliamentary elections.The campaign was funded collectively by members of the party, but again her stinginess overwhelmed her ambition, and she never wanted to give enough.In this way, in the huge campaign fund, Bernard Justin always contributed a little less money than he should have given as a candidate, and he lost the election.Mrs. Justin swallowed a bitter pill, but being the candidate's wife made her happy.Her husband's candidacy enabled her to meet many outstanding people, and she was overjoyed by the improvement of her social status.She knew that Bernard would never get into Parliament, and she just wanted to take the opportunity to earn some gratitude in the party, so it would be perfect for Bernard to lose the election by two or three votes. However, he was still a lowly lawyer, and many of his descendants seemed to have become queen lawyers.She felt that he must work towards this goal, otherwise there was no hope of becoming a judge at all.Plus his wife was agonizing over having to go to dinner parties with a woman ten years younger than her, and he should be, even for her sake.But for the first time in years she met with resistance from him.He worried that being promoted to the royal counselor lawyer would reduce business. A bird in the hand is better than two birds in the bush.She retorts that proverbs are just his last resort, which only shows that he has run out of words.He asked her to think about what would happen if her income was cut in half, which must be the worst thing for her.She still wouldn't listen.She called him a coward and gave him no peace.Ultimately, he caved in, as always.He applied to be Queen's Solicitor and was quickly granted. His fears came true.He made no progress as a senior attorney, and door-to-door business was few and far between.But he no longer concealed the disappointment in his heart, and dared to blame his wife if he felt unhappy.He probably talks a little less at home than before, but he has always been reticent, and no one has noticed this change in him.His daughters only regard him as the source of food and clothing for the whole family. In order for them to eat well, live warmly, play and have fun, he should be a cow and a horse.Now because of his fault, the money came less than before. Apart from being indifferent to him, they felt a layer of complaint and contempt for him in their hearts.They never wondered what was in the mind of this submissive little man.He got up early and went out, and went home on time at night to change clothes and eat.He is a stranger to them, but he is their father, so naturally he should love and love them. Mrs. Justin has an admirable courage.Her social circle was her life, but she would not allow any of them to see the predicament of her thwarted wishes.She lived as usual, carefully preparing luxurious dinners, no worse than before; she still showed enthusiasm, intimacy and radiance when she met friends.She has a small-talking ability that can be used both ways in the social arena.Any new topic will not make her stumble in the first half of a sentence. If there is an embarrassing silence, with her unique eyes, she can immediately find the topic and break it.She was a welcome guest in a crowd where small talk often did not go well. Judging from the current situation, Bernard Justin may not be able to expect to be promoted to the High Court Judge, but it may not be a problem to enter the District Court, and at worst he can find an official position in the colonies.At the same time, she expected that he might be hired as a criminal judge in a Welsh town, but she still pinned all her hopes on her daughter.By finding a good husband for her daughters, she wanted to wipe out all the bad luck in this life in one fell swoop.She has two daughters, Katie and Doris.Doris was not good-looking at all, her nose was too long and her figure was too thick.Mrs. Justin could only hope to find her a young husband with a decent career and a decent fortune. But Katie was a beauty, and she had been a beauty since she was a child: big brown eyes, lively and dewy, curly hair with a slight red sheen, fine teeth, and delightful skin.But her features did not seem to be very remarkable, for her cheeks were too flat, and her nose, though not as long as Doris's, was a little bigger.Her beauty depended so much on her youth that Mrs. Justin felt it necessary to find her a good husband in her early teenage years.Her finished look is truly stunning: her skin is still her best feature, and her eyes with long lashes are so luminous that anyone wants to take a second look.She has a lively nature and brings joy wherever she goes.Mrs. Justin poured all her emotions into her, and the cruelty and scheming hidden under the emotions are what she is good at.She is ambitious, and now she is not looking for a good husband for her daughter, but an outstanding husband. Katie grew up with the perception that she was going to be a beauty.She saw her mother's intentions, but it was just what she wanted.She appeared gracefully in front of the world.In order to make her daughter get acquainted with elegant gentlemen, Mrs. Justin gave full play to her talent and frequently got the chance to attend the ball.Katie became a courtesan.She's beautiful and funny, and she's making a dozen men fall in love in no time.But none of them were suitable, and Katie graciously continued her friendly intercourse with them, while carefully keeping them at a distance.The drawing-rooms of South Kensington were full on Sunday afternoons with young men seeking love.Mrs. Justine watched with satisfaction what was going on in her house with a grim smile, and it would be easy for her to keep them away from Katie.Katie flirts with everyone, while never forgetting to have a good time playing tricks on the guys.But if they wooed in public, as they all did, Katie would tactfully refuse them without saying the "no." The girl's first year passed quickly, and the perfect husband did not appear.The same goes for the following year.But she is still young and can wait.Mrs. Justin told her friends that it was a sad thing when a girl was not married until she was twenty-one.However, the third year passed.Then came the fourth year.Two or three former admirers were still courting her, but they were penniless.One or two boys younger than her also spoke.There was also a retired Indian official, now a royal adviser, who was fifty-three years old.Katie was still a frequent dancer, first at Wimbledon, at the Palace, then at Ascot, at Henley.She enjoys every ball, but still no man of status and satisfactory income proposes to her.Gradually, Mrs. Justin could no longer hold back.She sensed that Katie was beginning to deliberately attract men over forty.She reminded her daughter that she would not be so pretty in a year or two, and there are pretty girls every year.Mrs. Justin did not speak of this to her inner circle of friends, but solemnly warned her daughter that one day she would miss her old lovers. Katie just shrugged.She feels that her beauty has not diminished at all, and she is even more beautiful than before, because she has learned how to dress in the past four years, and she still has plenty of time.If she tried to marry for the sake of being married, a dozen young men would jump out in no time.It's only a matter of time before the perfect man appears.Mrs. Justin judged the situation more intelligently. She was worried about her beautiful daughter's blindness to opportunities. Now she must lower her standards a little.She began to look at the professional classes she had once haughtily despised, in the hope of finding a young lawyer or businessman whom she thought might have a bright future. Katie was twenty-five and still single.Mrs. Justin was furious and often showed Katie mercilessly.She asked Katie how long her father would keep her.He spent almost all the money he earned just to show her, and she didn't take a chance.Mrs. Justin never thought that maybe her excessive enthusiasm scared away the children of high officials and nobles. Every time she invited them, her intimacy made them shy away.She ends up chalking up Katie's failure to stupidity.Now it was Doris' turn.She still had a long nose, was not in shape, and was a terrible dancer.During her first year of girlhood, she became engaged to Jeffrey Dennison.He was the only son of a wealthy surgeon who had been made a baronet during the war, and Geoffrey would inherit the title.Although a medieval baronetship is not very glamorous, but - thank God, a title is a title after all.Not to mention that Jeffrey will inherit a large inheritance. Katie married Walter Finn in a fit of anger. 4 She had only known him for a short time, and had never looked at him more than twice.She couldn't remember when or where they first met.It was only after the engagement that she learned from him that it was at a ball and that friends had dragged him there.Of course she couldn't pay much attention to him then.If she danced with him, it was because of her usual good temper, and she would not refuse anyone who asked her to dance.A day or two later, at another ball, he came to speak to her, and she knew nothing about him.Then it dawned on her: He was at every dance she went to. "You know, I've danced with you a dozen times. Now you have to tell me what your name is," she finally said to him with her usual smile. He was obviously surprised. "You mean you don't know my name? I was introduced to you once." "Well, they always mumble, though. I wouldn't be surprised if you couldn't remember my name at all." He smiled at her.His face was serious, even a little harsh, but his smile was very kind. "Of course I know." He paused for a moment. "Aren't you curious?" he continued. "Like most women, very curious." "Haven't you ever thought of asking someone my name?" She was almost amused to death.She wondered that he thought she would be interested in his name.But she loves to please.She showed him a charming smile, her beautiful eyes were like pools of dewdrops in the forest, implying a charming kindness. "Well, what's your name?" "Walter Finn." She didn't know why he was going to the ball, he was a terrible dancer and he didn't seem to know anyone.She suddenly wondered if he might fall in love with her, but immediately shrugged her shoulders to dismiss the idea.She knew a lot of girls wishful thinking that every guy they met was in love with them, and it turned out they were ridiculous.However, she paid more attention to Walter than before.He's not like other boys who fell in love with her.Most of them had the audacity to tell her they wanted to kiss her.There are indeed many such people.But Walter Finn never spoke kindly of her, and seldom of his own.He was too quiet, but she didn't mind much, because she had a lot of talk, and if he laughed at one of her little humors, it would blow her away.But he's not stupid when he talks, he's just very shy.He seems to live somewhere in the East, and is currently on vacation at home. He showed up in South Kensington one Sunday afternoon.There were a dozen people present, and he sat for a while, seeming uncomfortable, and then left.Later her mother asked her who the man was. "I can't tell. Did you send him here?" "Yes. I met him at the Baddeleys. He said he'd seen you at several balls. I told him I was home every Sunday." "His name is Finn, and he got a job in the East." "Yes, he's a doctor. Is he in love with you?" "I'm not sure yet." "I thought by now you should be able to tell for yourself which young man is in love with you." "Even if he fell in love with me, I wouldn't marry him," said Katie absently. Mrs. Justin said nothing, but her displeasure was concealed in the silence.Katie blushed, knowing that her mother didn't care who she married now, all she wanted was for her to get out of her house sooner. But one afternoon she was walking home from Harold's when she happened to meet Walter Fane on the Brompton Road.He stopped to talk to her.Then, casually, he asked her if she would mind taking a walk in the park.She was in no rush to go home, and the park was indeed a place of comfort.They wandered casually, chatting about trivial matters as usual, and then he asked her how she planned to spend the summer. "Well, we've been hiding out in the country. Father, you know, has been working for a while and is getting tired. We try to find the quietest place we can." Katie's answer was not without sarcasm, because she knew that her father's business was not so much that he was tired, and it was not his turn in the family to decide the destination of the vacation.The point is that quiet places are cheap. "Don't you think those chairs are nice?" Walter said suddenly. She followed his gaze, and there were two green chairs on the grass under the tree, very close to them. "Let's sit down," she said. But when they sat down, he suddenly became strange and seemed restless.What an oddity he was, she thought, but she went on chatting cheerfully, wondering why he had invited her for a walk in the park.Maybe he's going to pour out his admiration for that dumb nurse in Hong Kong?He turned to her suddenly, interrupting what she had just said, and it turned out that he was not listening to her at all.His face was all pale. "I have something to tell you." She glanced at him quickly, his eyes looked anxious, his voice was a little strange, low and trembling.Before she could think about why he became so agitated, he spoke again. "I want to ask you, would you marry me?" "You frighten me!" she replied, looking at him in shock. "Don't you know that I have fallen in love with you?" "You never hinted at that." "I'm so stupid. Talking is much harder for me than doing." His heart beat faster.She has encountered countless courtships, and they are all pleasing and affectionate.She turned them down in the same way.No one had ever proposed to her so abruptly, even painfully. "Thank you," she said dubiously. "I fell in love with you the first time I saw you. I also wanted to confess to you, but I really couldn't muster the courage." "I don't know if it's right for you to do that." She giggled. She was glad to have a chance to laugh a little.The weather was fairly clear, but the air around them was heavy and ominous.He frowned tightly. "Well, you know what I mean. I don't want to lose hope. But now you're leaving and I'm going back to China in the fall." "I never thought you were like that." She couldn't think of what to say. He said nothing more, and looked down at the grass with a gloomy look.He was such a weirdo, but now that he confessed, she had a vague feeling that this kind of love for her had never been encountered before.She was a little frightened, but also very proud.His indifference is still vivid. "You have to give me time to think about it." He still didn't answer, didn't move.Was he waiting for her to make a decision?That's ridiculous.She had to discuss it with her mother first.She should have stood up when she was talking just now, she just sat and waited for his answer.But now, for some reason, she felt that she couldn't move even if she wanted to.She didn't look at him, but only recalled his image in her heart.She never dreamed of marrying a man who was only a little taller than her.When you sit next to him, you will find that his appearance is quite handsome, and you will also see how cold his face is.And it's a weird feeling when you realize that there's a lot of passion in him. "I don't know you, I don't know you at all," she said tremblingly. He turned his gaze to her.She felt her eyes meet his involuntarily.There was a tenderness in his eyes that she had never seen before, and they seemed to be begging at the same time, like the things in the eyes of a dog who has been whipped.This heightened her nervousness. "I think we're already familiar," he said. "You're still shy, aren't you?" It was the weirdest thing she had ever said.On such an occasion, it seemed to her that their conversation should at any rate come to an end.She doesn't love him at all.She didn't understand why she hadn't said no to him yet. "I'm so stupid," he said, "I want to tell you I love you more than anything in the world, but I just can't." 现在更怪的事发生了，她竟然有点感动。他当然不是那么冷漠，只不过是他不会交际罢了。现在她比以前任何时候都更喜欢他。多丽丝十一月就要结婚了。那时他也会去中国。要是她嫁给他，那么她就会和他一起去。给多丽丝当伴娘可不太妙，能躲开是最好不过了。要是多丽丝结了婚，而她还是单身，岂不更显出她是个老处女。那时就没人想再答理她了。对她来说嫁给瓦尔特不是十分中意，但是毕竟是一场婚姻。况且中国的生活也很令人向往。她已经受不了妈妈那张冷嘲热讽的嘴了。跟她同岁的姑娘早就都嫁了人，几乎个个连孩子都有了。她再也懒得去探望她们，跟她们谈论她们的心肝宝贝。瓦尔特·费恩会给她带来新的生活。她转向了他，露出了信心十足的微笑。 “假如我鲁莽地答应你，你打算什么时候娶我？” 他惊喜地喘了一口气，刚才还是苍白的脸一下子红光满面。 “就是现在！马上。越快越好。我们去意大利度蜜月。八月和九月。” 那样她就不用夏天跑到乡下和父母住五基尼一礼拜的牧师小屋了。一瞬间她的脑海里浮现出《邮政早报》的布告：新娘将回到东方，婚礼不日举行。她了解妈妈，她一定会让这条消息在显著位置刊登。至少那时不是多丽丝显风头的时候，等到她举行她更为隆重的婚礼时，凯蒂早已经远走高飞了。 她伸出了她的手。 “我想我非常喜欢你。你必须给我时间让我适应你。” “那么你答应了？”他打断她的话。 "I think so." 5 那时她对他的了解仅有一星半点，而现在，结婚已经将近两年了，这种了解却没能增进多少。起初她被他的关心所感动，对他的热情感到既意外又惊喜。他十分体贴，时时刻刻不忘给她带来舒适。只要她开口，哪怕是鸡毛蒜皮的小事儿，他都不会耽搁上半刻。他时常给她带来小礼物。要是她不巧生了病，再没有比他细心周到的了。要是她有什么烦人的事懒得做，那可就是帮了他的大忙。他对她总是谦敬如宾。她一进门，他便会起身站立。她要下车，他会伸手搀扶。要是碰巧在街上遇见她，他一定对她脱帽致敬。她要出屋，他会殷勤地为她开门。进入她的卧室和化妆室之前，他必先敲门。他对待凯蒂不像她见过的任何男人对待妻子那样，倒像是把她当成乡下来的同乡。这滑稽的情形让她高兴了一阵，但也不免厌倦。如果他能更随意一点，他们就会更亲近些。如今他们只是徒有夫妻之名，关系远非通常夫妻那样亲昵。他还是个热情似火的人，有点歇斯底里，而且多愁善感。 她很惊讶地发现他是多么地情绪化。他平时的自制要么源于害羞，要么是长久养成的习惯，她不确定是哪一种。等到她躺到他的怀里，他变得心满意足时，平时绝不敢说荒唐话、绝不敢做荒唐事的人，竟然满口小孩儿气的话。这让她多少开始瞧不起他。有一次她讥笑说，他说的是世界上最吓人的胡话。她感觉到他的胳膊松了下来，他半天没说话，然后放开她一个人回到自己的卧室。她不想伤害他的感情，一两天过后，她对他说： “你这个傻家伙，你说的那些话我根本没觉得不好。” 他只是羞涩地笑了笑。不久以后她发现他很难融入到别人的圈子里去。他太过难为情了。要是在晚会上，大家都开始唱歌，里面保准没有瓦尔特。他面带微笑坐在一旁，似乎也从中得到了快乐，但实际上他的笑是装出来的。他的笑更像是在嘲讽，让人觉得在他心里这些自娱自乐的人根本是一群傻瓜。轮流唱歌是多么令凯蒂兴高采烈的事，然而他就是不肯加入进去。在去中国的途中他们参加了一次化装舞会，让他像别人一样穿上奇装异服连门儿也没有。显然他认为这些都是无聊透顶，这很让她扫兴。 凯蒂天生活泼，她愿意一天到晚说个不停，想笑就笑。他的沉默却常常浇灭她的热情。对于她说的闲聊话，他从来不搭腔，这让她愤懑。那些话题的确不需要特别的回答，但是有人回应毕竟令人高兴。要是外面下雨了，她会说：“雨下得好大啊。”她等着他说：“嗯，是啊。”然而他却像个闷葫芦。有时她真想上去摇摇他的脑袋。 “我说雨下得很大！”她重复了一遍。 “我听到了。”他回答道，脸上露出亲切的微笑。 这表明他不是故意惹她生气。他不说话是因为他无话可说。不过后来凯蒂微笑着想，要是谁都在有话可说的时候才开口，那用不了多久人类大概就不会讲话了。