Chapter 12 "Black Friars" VII

seven Once, one long winter night, Kovrin was lying in bed reading a French novel.Poor Tanya was not used to living in the city, and she suffered from headaches every evening, and was already asleep by then, occasionally uttering a few incoherent words in her sleep. The clock struck three.Kovrin blew out the candle and lay down.He lay for a long time with his eyes closed, but could not fall asleep.It seemed to him that it was hot in the bedroom, and that Tanya was talking in her sleep.At half-past four he lit the candle again, when he saw the Black Friar sitting in an armchair beside the bed.

"Hello," said the monk.He was silent for a while, then asked, "What are you thinking now?" "I want fame," Kovrin replied. "In a French novel I've just read there is a description of a young scholar who does stupid things and wears away with a desire for fame. This desire is incomprehensible to me." "Because you're smart. You're as indifferent to fame as you are to a toy you're not interested in." "Yes, that's the truth." "Fame doesn't attract you. They put your name on gravestones, but time wears off your name and the gold dust from it; what's there to be honorable, interesting, profitable in such a thing? Besides, you are so numerous that the weak memory of mankind cannot preserve your names, and that is a good thing."

"Of course," agreed Kovrin. "And why remember them? But let's talk about something else. For example, about happiness. What is happiness?" The clock struck five, but Kovrin sat on the edge of the bed, with his feet stretched out on the carpet, and said to the monk: "In ancient times there was a happy man, but later he was terrified by his happiness, and his happiness Too big. He offered his beloved ring to the gods as a sacrifice, to beg the gods to be merciful. Do you know that I, like Polycrates, began to feel a little uneasy about my happiness. I feel strange: I feel happy all day long, it fills my whole soul and overwhelms all other feelings. I don't experience depression, sadness or boredom. Now I can't sleep, I suffer from insomnia, But I don't feel bored or bored. In fact, I'm beginning to wonder."

"Why is that?" said the monk in surprise. "Is happiness a supernatural feeling? Shouldn't it be the normal state of man? The higher a man is intellectually and morally developed, the freer he is, and the more pleasure life affords him." Socrates Diogenes, Diogenes, Marcus Aurelius felt happy, not sad, and the Acts says to be merry always. If you are happy, you will be happy. " "But what if the god gets angry?" Kovrin said jokingly, laughing. "It would be a bad thing if they deprived me of a comfortable environment and forced me to freeze and starve."

At that moment Tanya woke up and looked at her husband with surprise and terror.He was talking, gesticulating, and laughing in front of the armchair.His eyes were shining brightly, and his laugh was kind of weird. "Andryusha, who are you talking to?" she asked, taking the hand he extended to the monk. "Andryusha! With whom?" "Ah? With whom?" Kovrin said, flustered. "Here, follow him. . . and he's just sitting there," he said, pointing to the Black Friar. "There's no one here, . . . no one! Andryusha, you're sick!" Tanya embraced her husband and clung to him as if to protect him from phantoms.She put her hands over his eyes.

"You're sick!" she said, crying, shaking all over. "Forgive me, my dear, I've noticed long ago that you're in a trance. . . . You're out of your wits, Andryusha. . . . " Her trembling infected him too.He took another look at the armchair, and there was no one there.He suddenly felt weak in his arms and legs, frightened, and began to dress. "It's nothing, Tanya, it's nothing..." he murmured, trembling. "I'm really a little uncomfortable, . . . and now I have to admit it." "I've seen it, . . . Daddy has seen it too," she said, trying to stop crying. "You talk a lot to yourself, and you laugh a little queerly, . . . you can't sleep. Oh my God, my God, save us!" she said in alarm. "But don't be afraid, Andryusha, don't be afraid, for God's sake, don't be afraid..." She also began to dress.Only now, looking at her, did Kovrin understand how dangerous his situation was, and what it was about the black friars and talking to them.Now he realizes that he is crazy.

The two of them, not knowing why, put on their clothes and walked into the living room. She walked in front and he followed behind.Yegor Semyonitch, who was their guest, was awakened by the crying, and stood in the drawing-room in his long robe, holding a candle in his hand. "Don't be afraid, Andryusha," said Tanya, trembling like a fever, "don't be afraid. . . . Papa, it will pass, . . . it will pass. ..." Kovrin was too excited to speak.He originally wanted to say to his father-in-law in a joking tone: "Congratulate me, I seem to be crazy," but he only moved his lips, showing a wry smile.

At nine o'clock in the morning they put him in a coat and fur coat, tied a scarf, and drove him in a carriage to the doctor.He started to heal. "Notes" ① Polycrates, the tyrant of Samos in the sixth century BC. ②Marco Aurelius (121-180), Roman emperor, the last great philosopher of Stoicism.