Chapter 6 fish love

fish love It was a strange thing to say: the only crucian carp in the pond near the villa of General Pandalykin fell in love with the woman who lived in the villa, Sonia Mamochkina.But what's so strange about it?Lermontov's devil fell in love with Damara, the swan fell in love with Leda, and didn't clerks often fall in love with their master's daughter?Sonia Mamochkina came every morning to bathe with her aunt.The passionate crucian carp swam to the shore to watch.A Kranjell & Sons foundry runs nearby, so the water in the pond has long since turned dark brown, but even so, the crucian carp can see everything.It saw white clouds and birds flying in the blue sky, saw the women in the villa take off their clothes, saw some young people hiding in the bushes on the bank and peeping, saw the fat aunt sitting on the stone for five minutes before going into the water , caressing his body proudly, said: "What does my elephant look like? It's scary to look at."

Sonia took off the thin clothes on her body, screamed, jumped into the water, swam up, shrank her neck in the cold, and the crucian carp immediately slipped to her side, and began to greedily kiss her little feet, shoulders, and neck. ... The women of the two villas had gone home from their baths to drink tea and sweet bread. As for the crucian carp, swimming alone in the vast pond, he thought to himself: "Of course, the possibility of her and I falling in love with each other is out of the question. How can such a beauty like her fall in love with a fish like me?" Crucian carp? No, nothing! Don't tempt yourself with fantasies, you despicable fish! There is only one fate left for you, and that is death! But how to die? There are no pistols and belts in the pond. Phosphorous matches. For us crucian carp, there is only one way to die, and that is to fall into the mouth of a pike. But where to find a pike? There used to be a pike in this pond, but even it And bored to death. Oh, what a misfortune I am!"

The young pessimist contemplates death, dives into the muck, and writes his diary there. ... Once, just before evening, Sonia and her aunt were sitting on the bank of a pond fishing.The crucian carp swam around beside the float, never taking his eyes off his beloved girl.Suddenly, a thought flashed through his mind like lightning. "I might as well die by her hands!" it thought to itself, flicking its fins happily. "Oh, what a wonderful and pleasant way to die!" Full of determination, but with a slightly pale face, he swam towards Sonia's hook and took the hook with his mouth.

"Sonia, you've got a fish!" shrieked her aunt. "Honey, you've got a fish in there!" "Ah! Ah!" Sonia jumped up and pulled as hard as she could.Something golden flashed in the air and fell into the water with a thud, leaving many circles on the surface. "It's gone!" The two female guests of the villa yelled, their faces turning pale. "Lost! oops!Dear! " Everyone looked at the hook and saw a piece of fish's lips hanging on the hook. "Well, dear," said my aunt, "you shouldn't have tried so hard. Now the poor fish has to live without a lip."

After my hero fell from the hook, he was petrified and did not understand for a long time what had happened.Then it came to itself and groaned, "I'm alive again! I'm alive again! O mockery of fate!" When the crucian carp found that its jaw was gone, it turned pale and laughed wildly. ...it's crazy. It may seem strange, however, that I should attempt to attract the attention of the serious reader by the fate of such an insignificant and uninteresting creature as the crucian carp.In fact, what is so strange about this?Some ladies write about goblins and snails in big magazines that no one wants.I'm imitating those ladies.I might even be a lady myself, just masking myself with a man's pseudonym.

In short, this crucian carp is crazy.The unfortunate fish is still alive to this day. Generally speaking, crucian carp like to be fried in sour cream, but my hero now likes to be killed in any way.Sonia Mamochkina was married to a pharmacist, and her aunt had gone to Lipetsk to see her married sister.This was not surprising, since the married sister had six children, all of whom loved the aunt. Now, go ahead and write.There was an engineer, Cresin, who was the head of the foundry of Cranjell & Sons.He had a nephew named Ivan, who, as you know, wrote poems and published them with gusto in all the magazines and newspapers.One day at noon, the weather was hot, and the young poet walked across the pond, thinking of going down to take a bath.He took off his clothes and entered the pond.The delirious carp mistook him for Sonia Mamochkina, swam up to him, and kissed him tenderly on the back.This kiss was innocuous, but had the most devastating consequences: the crucian carp infected the poet with pessimism.The poet didn't expect at all that when he came out of the water, he laughed like crazy and went home.A few days later he went to Petersburg.He went to the editorial office over there and infected all the poets with pessimism, and from then on our poets have been writing melancholy poems.

"Notes" ① See Lermontov's long poem. ② In Greek mythology, the wife of King Tyndarios of Sparta, Zeus was obsessed with her appearance and turned into a swan to meet her. ③A small and medium-sized fish, the bait of ferocious fish.