Chapter 19 Gratitude

Gratitude Akutagawa Ryunosuke Aunt Kojinnai's words My name is Shinne.What is my surname... Ai Ai, since a long time ago, everyone has called me Grandma Gang Jinnei.Grandma Minato - have you heard of this name?No, don't panic, I'm the famous thief you know.However, you came here tonight, not to rob, please rest assured. I know you.You are a highly respected person among Japanese priests.Maybe you are not happy even for a while with a robber.However, I am not specialized in being a robber.At one time, a small official under Lu Song Zuoweimen who was summoned by Jule Gong was indeed called Jinai.There is also the even singer who sent a precious water ladle called "Red Head" to Layman Rikyu, whose real name is also Jinai.And a few years ago, I wrote a book called "Amagang Diary", and the person who worked as an open-air messenger in Dacun was also called Jinnai?In addition, the monk who rescued the captain Martinet during the trouble in Santiaoheyuan, and the merchant who sold Nanban herbal medicine in front of the Miaoguo Temple where he was buried...their names are also Jinnei.No, the most important one was the one who donated the gold stupa with the fingernails of St. Mary last year at St. Francis Church, that is, a believer named Jinai.

① Liange is a kind of Japanese waka, composed by two people, Liangeshi is the author of Liange. ②A person who works in the open air and is an oral interpreter for foreigners. But tonight I regret that I don't have time to elaborate on his experience, but please believe that there is nothing special about ordinary people in this world.Well, then, I will try to describe my purpose as simply as possible. I have come to ask you to celebrate Mass for a dead soul.No, this man is not of my blood, nor the man who left the blood on my knife.The name, the name... Well, I don't know if it's good to say it.For the soul of that man—that is to say, for a Japanese named Paul, let me pray for peace.can't you? ——Of course, under the entrustment of my grandmother Minato Jinnai, I have to be cautious when doing such a thing.However, regardless of the living or the dead, please do not tell others.You have a cross on your breast, and I still want you to obey this one.No,—forgive me (laughs).I am a robber, suspicious of a priest, it is too presumptuous.However, if you don't abide by this agreement (suddenly serious), even if you don't get burned to death by hellfire, you will be punished in this world.

It was two years ago.In the middle of a windy night, I disguised myself as a traveling monk and wandered the streets of the capital.I didn't start walking like this that night. Five nights before and after, every night after the first watch, I would avoid people's eyes and spy on people's doors.Of course my purpose goes without saying.Especially at that time I was thinking of going abroad to Morikah and needed a sum of money. Of course, there are no pedestrians on the street, only stars in the sky, and the wind keeps whistling.I passed under the dark eaves and walked to Ogawa Town. When I came to the corner of the cross road, I saw a large house, which was the main house of the famous Hojo Yaya Sanemon in the capital.Although Hojo House was engaged in maritime business like Kokura, it was still not as good as Kokko, but after all, there were one or two sand ships going to Siam and Luzon, so they could be regarded as a wealthy businessman.I didn't come here specifically to find this family, but since I met them, I planned to make a deal.As I said, it was a blustery night--just the thing for our business.I hid the straw hat and walking stick in the water storage tank by the roadside, and jumped up to the high wall.

Everyone in the world says that Grandma Hongnei knows invisibility-of course you don't believe such words like ordinary people.I don't know invisibility, and I don't have any demons attached to me. It's just that when I was in Ama Port, I paid homage to a Portuguese ship doctor's teacher and learned some brilliant skills. When applied in the field, I can twist the big iron lock and open No problem with heavy latches (laughs).This kind of stealing ability that was not available in the past—in this uncivilized country of Japan, like foreign guns and crosses, it was also introduced from the West.

It didn't take long for me to enter the inner courtyard of Hojo House and walk through a dark corridor. Unexpectedly, it was late at night, and there were still lights in the room, and there were voices of conversation. It seemed that there was a tea room. "Tea talk on a windy night", I smiled wryly and walked over gently.I'm not worried that human voices will hinder my activities, but I'm interested in the late-night conversation between the host and the guests in such an elegant house. Walking outside the partition, I heard the sound of a samovar boiling water in my ears, and at the same time as this sound, I unexpectedly heard the sound of talking and crying.Who is crying - it's a woman crying.In this kind of tea room of a wealthy family, it is not common for a woman to cry in the middle of the night. I held my breath, and looked quietly into the tea room through the light from the crack in the partition.

In the light, I saw paintings and calligraphy hanging in the antique room, and bonsai of chrysanthemums—it really is a quiet and interesting room, in front of the room—right in front of me, there is an old man sitting, probably the owner Yasanemon, wearing a feathered silk coat with a fine pattern, folded his hands on his chest, and at a glance, the sound of the samovar was as clear as the boiling sound.Below him sat a dignified old lady with a high bun, with a side face, wiping away tears. "Although I live in a rich life, I probably have encountered some difficulties." Thinking of this, I naturally smiled.Smiling—no ill will toward the couple.People like me who have had a notorious reputation for forty years will gloat at others—especially their misfortunes (cruel expression).At that time, I was like watching a kabuki scene, and I was very happy to watch the old couple lament (sarcastically laughing).However, it's not just me. Anyone who reads novels likes to read tragic plots.

After a while, Ya Sanemon sighed and said: "I have encountered this kind of difficulty, and crying and crying can't help me. Starting tomorrow, I will dismiss all the shop assistants." At that time, a gust of wind shook the tearoom and disrupted the sound, so I couldn't hear Mrs. Ya Sanemon's words clearly.The master nodded, folded his hands on his knees, looked up at the bamboo ceiling, thick black eyebrows, pointed cheekbones, especially the long eyes-the more he looked, the more he looked good, and he had seen it somewhere of. "Lord, Jesus Christ, please give us your strength..."

Ya Sanemon closed his eyes and muttered a prayer.The old woman also prayed for God's blessing.I continued to stare at Ya Sanemon's face without blinking.Another gust of wind blew outside the house, and my heart flashed. I remembered the past twenty years ago, and I could clearly see Ya Sanemon's face in my memory. What happened 20 years ago——I don’t need to say much, just simply talk about the facts.At that time, when I went overseas to Port Ama, there was a Japanese captain who saved my life.At that time, everyone separated without a common name.Now I see this Ya Sanemon, and it turns out to be the captain of that year.I didn't expect such a coincidence.I still stared at the old man's face, at his broad shoulders and bony fingers, which still carried the sea air of coral reefs and the smell of White Sandalwood Mountain.

After finishing his long prayer, Yasanemon said quietly to the old woman: "From now on, I have to listen to God's arrangements. Look, the samovar is open. Let's all have a cup of tea!" The old woman held back the pain in her chest again, and said quietly: "Yes, but what I regret in my heart is..." "Come on, what's the use of nagging, the Hojo Maru sank, all capital is over..." "No, that's not what I'm talking about, I'm thinking of my son Yasaburo, if you don't drive him away..." After listening to this conversation, I smiled again, and now I am no longer gloating at Hojoya, but thinking that I "have a chance to repay my kindness", and feel happy.My grandmother, Minato Jinnai, who was hunted everywhere, was finally able to repay my benefactor.This joy—no, no one but myself will understand (sarcastically).Those who do good in the world are poor. They have never done a single bad thing, and even if they do good, they will not feel happy.They don't understand this feeling.

"What are you talking about, it would be better if there were no such beasts in the world." Misanemon said, looking away from the light, "If that guy can be used as a messenger to get through today's difficulties, then driving him away ..." Ya Sanemon had just finished speaking when he suddenly saw me in surprise.Of course he would be surprised, at that time I had pushed open the paper partition silently, and I was dressed as a traveling monk, I had just taken off the bamboo hat, and I was wearing a Nanban turban underneath. "Who are you?" Although Yasanemon was an old man, he jumped up all at once.

"No, please don't panic. My name is Ama Minato... Oh, don't worry, I am a robber. I came to the house tonight. I have other business..." I took off my hood and sat down in front of Yasanemon. I don't tell you what will happen in the future, and you can guess it.I promised him that in order to save him from his distress and repay his great kindness, within three days, I would raise six thousand guan ① silver for him, not missing a day.Ouch, there seems to be someone outside the door.Excuse me then, tomorrow or the day after tomorrow night, I will sneak in again.Although the light of the Great Cross shines in the sky of Ama Port, it cannot be seen in the sky of Japan.I didn't leave Japan like a starlight, and I came here to invite you to mass tonight, just because I was afraid of hurting Paul's soul. ① Japanese consistent, about seven and a half catties. How do you say I escaped?Don't worry about that, I can go out freely from this high skylight, from that big chimney mouth, now, please, for the sake of the soul of my benefactor, Paul, please don't tell outsiders. Words from Sanemon Hojo Yaya Priest, hear my confession.You probably know that there is a famous thief in society recently, named Ama Gangjinnei. It is said that this person once lived on the high tower of Genlai Temple and stole the sword of killing Guanbai. Can do anything.This person was finally caught, and he made a public display at the head of a back bridge recently. You probably have heard the news.I have received great kindness from my aunt, Hong Kong, and there is nothing to say about this kindness. The reason is that I have suffered a catastrophe. Please listen to my detailed explanation and pray to God for me, asking to forgive me as a sinner. In the winter two years ago, I had a Beitiaolong sea boat, which sank in the sea in a series of big storms, and all my assets were lost. Scattered, there is no other way.You know, those of us who do business usually have counterparties, but we have no real friends.As a result, all my property is like a boat capsized in the sea, falling into the eighteenth hell.Suddenly one night——I still remember it very clearly, it was a windy night, my wife and I were in the room you know, talking until late at night.At that time, a person came in suddenly, wearing the clothes of a traveling monk and a Nanban turban. This person was that Ama Gangjinei.I was taken aback and very angry.I heard from him that he sneaked into my house to steal. He saw the lights in the tea room and heard people talking. He looked in through the crack of the partition and recognized me, Ya Sanemon, who had saved his life. Yes. The benefactor of twenty years ago. Yes, it happened twenty years ago.At that time, I was the captain of the ship Fustai, which was sailing to Amma Harbor. When the ship was docking, I rescued a Japanese man without a beard.This man was drunk and fought with others, killed a Chinese, and was being chased to nowhere.Only now do I know that this person is Grandma Gangjinnei, who has become a famous robber.When I heard him say it, I remembered that there was such a thing.The whole family was asleep at the time, but fortunately no one heard him, so I asked him what he was doing here. Jinnai said that as long as he can do it, in order to repay the kindness of saving his life 20 years ago, he asked me how much money I need to save the disaster of Hojo House.I couldn't help but smiled wryly, and borrowed money from the robber-this is outrageous.Although he is a great robber, if he had so much money, he would not come to my house to steal.But when I mentioned the amount of silver, he lowered his head and thought for a while, then said, "It's too late tonight, please wait for me for three days, I will definitely do it, and he agreed immediately."I can't believe that the six thousand guan sum I need can really be done.Just out of helplessness, I had to accept it, knowing that it might not be reliable anyway. That night, Jinnai drank tea slowly at my house and went back in the strong wind.The next day, no money was sent, and another day later, there was still no news. On the third day, it was snowing, and there was still no news at night.I didn't have much confidence in Jinnei's agreement, but I still didn't dismiss the shop assistant, and waited with hope in case.On the third night, I was facing the lamp, listening to the sound of snow falling outside. After about three o'clock, I suddenly heard someone fighting in the yard outside the house. My heart skipped a beat. Of course, I wondered if I was being chased by the police—I immediately opened the partition door facing the yard, and raised the lamp to look over.In front of the snow-covered tea room, where some bamboos were overwhelmed, two people were twisted on the ground—suddenly one of them threw the other away, and immediately jumped under the shade of a tree, jumped over the wall and escaped.I heard the sound of snow falling to the ground and climbing over the wall—after that, there was no sound, and it probably fell outside the wall.But the person who was thrown away didn't chase after him, he pounced on the snow on his body, and walked in front of me quietly: "I am Ama Kojinnai!" I looked at him in amazement, he was still wearing the costume of a walking monk and a Nanban turban tonight. "Hey, I was disturbing you, but luckily no one heard you." Jinnai entered the room and said with a wry smile, "Just now when I came in, I saw a man climbing into the roof, I wanted to catch him and see who he was, but in the end Still escaped." I thought I was here to arrest him and asked him if he was on business.Zhennai said, what tolerance, it's a thief, and the robber catches the thief-it's an anecdote.This time, I smiled wryly.Of course, I don't know if he brought any money, so I'm always worried.Jinnei saw what I meant, and before I could speak, he took out bags of silver from his pocket and put them in front of the fire bowl. "Don't worry, we have already raised 6,000 guan. Most of them were obtained yesterday, and there is only 200 guan. I brought them today. Please put away your wallet. What I got yesterday, I already took advantage of you The two elders didn't realize it, and put it under the floor of this tea room, maybe the thief who came today smelled the smell of silver." After hearing this, I suspected that I was in a dream.Accepting the robber’s money, I know it’s wrong even if you don’t tell me, but when I half-believe and don’t know if I can receive it, I can’t think of it, now I can’t say no, if I don’t accept it, my family will be finished , please forgive my mood at that time, I bowed to Jinai again and again, and burst into tears without saying anything. In the next two years, I heard no news from Jinnei. My family was not bankrupt and lived a peaceful life, all thanks to Jinnei's rescue.Behind my back I always prayed to the Virgin Mary to keep him safe.Recently I heard on the street that Jinnei was arrested, beheaded, and hung on the back of the bridge to show the public. I was shocked and secretly shed tears. Of course, evil will be rewarded with evil. I have nothing to say. I have not been punished by God for many years. It was already an accident. , but because of the great kindness, I have to pray for his blessings - so today I hurried to a back bridge alone to see the head of the public. On Anqiaotou Street, a large crowd of spectators had surrounded the place where the head was hung. The notice board announcing the crime and the tolerance of guarding the head were the same as usual.On a shelf made of three bamboos, hung a human head—ah, what a horrible, bloody human head, I just don't know what to say.Among the noisy crowd, I looked up to see the pale head, and suddenly I was taken aback. It was not him, not the head of Ama Kojinnai.The thick black eyebrows, the protruding chin, and the knife marks between the eyebrows don't look very inside at all. ——Suddenly, in the sunlight, the surrounding crowd and the human heads on the bamboo frame all disappeared into a distant world. It was as if I had been hit by a thunderstorm.It's not Jinnai's head, it's my own head, it's me twenty years ago—the me when I rescued Jinnai—Yasaburo, if I twisted my tongue back then, I would scream , but I couldn't make a sound, I was shaking all over. Yasaburo!I looked at my son's head obsessively. The eyes on this man's face were half-opened, staring straight at me. What's going on?Why did you mistook my son for Jinnai?As long as you think about it carefully, this kind of misunderstanding must never happen.Could it be that Ama Gangjin is my son, and the fake monk who came to my house that night was an impostor?No, there will be no such thing.In such a big Japan, who can get 6,000 guan silver within three days without any mistakes in one day, except Jinnei?At this time, the shadow of the man who fought with Jinnai in the yard on a snowy night two years ago suddenly appeared in front of my eyes.Who is that person, is it my child?When I saw him at that time, he really looked like my son. Was it just a momentary blur?Maybe it was really my son—I just woke up from a big dream, and I looked at the head without blinking. I saw the purple half-open mouth, which seemed to be wearing a blank smile. The head of the public can smile-you won’t believe it, I thought it was just my hallucination at the time, but after a closer look, there is indeed a smile on the dry mouth.I stared at this strange smile for a long time, and unconsciously, I laughed too, and I shed tears while laughing. "Dad, please forgive me,..." In the speechless smile, it seems to hear him say: "Father, please forgive my crime of unfilial piety. On a snowy night two years ago, I secretly came home to apologize to you. Knocking on your bedroom door in the middle of the night, I came to see you again, and I happened to see that there was still light in the tea room, and I was walking over timidly, when suddenly someone, without saying a word, hugged me." "Father, you already know what happened in the future. Because I saw you suddenly, I hurriedly threw the man away and jumped over the wall to escape. From the snowy light, the man who fought looked like a wandering monk. Later, no one was chasing him. , I boldly went back outside the tea room and overheard your conversation through the crack of the partition." "Father, Jinnai is the benefactor of our whole family who saved Hojo House. I made a wish that if he is in danger, I will risk my life to repay his kindness. Only me, a homeless person who has been kicked out of my family, I have been waiting for this opportunity for two years—this opportunity has finally come. Please forgive my unfilial piety, I have already arrived in another world, but I have also repaid the great benefactor of the whole family, and I feel comforted of……" On the way home, I laughed and cried, admiring my son's courage.You don't know that my son Yasaburo, like me, was a Christian, and he took the Christian name Paul.But——my son is an unfortunate person, no, not only my son, but I myself would not have come here to cry today if my grandma hadn’t saved my family from going bankrupt.Although I am reluctant to part with it, I have no choice but to do so.It’s a good thing that the family is not displaced, but wouldn’t it be better if my son didn’t die—(A burst of severe pain.) Please save me, if I live like this, I might hate my great benefactor even more What about... (Crying for a long time.) Paul Yasaburo's words Ah, the Virgin Mary!By daybreak, my head was about to fall to the ground.My head falls to the ground, but my soul will fly to you like a bird.No, I have done bad things all my life, maybe I will not reach heaven, but will fall into the fire of hell.But I do so willingly, and my heart has never been so happy in twenty years. My name is Yasaburo Hojo, but my head, which is displayed to the public, is called Ama Kojinnai.I'm that Grandma Minato--what a joy, Grandma Minato--what, isn't that a pretty name?When I said this name in my mouth, I was in a dark prison, and my heart seemed to be full of roses and lilies. Unforgettable winter two years ago, on a snowy night, I sneaked into my father’s house in order to find some gambling money. I saw a light in the house, and I was about to step forward to look around. Suddenly, someone grabbed me without saying a word. I fell back, and he grabbed me again—I don't know who it was, we wrestled for two or three rounds, and suddenly the partition door of the tea room opened, and someone came out to the yard with a lamp It turned out that it was my father Yasanemon, and I threw the captured body away with all my might, jumped over the wall and escaped. But after running for about a dozen feet, I hid under the eaves of someone's house and looked to both sides of the street. There was heavy snow falling on the dark street, and there was no one on the road. That person didn't come after him. Who is he?In a hurry, I only knew that he looked like a traveling monk. He had a strong arm, so of course he was not an ordinary monk. Why did this monk come to my house in a snowy night? — This is so strange.After thinking about it, I decided to take the risk and sneak out of the tea room to investigate again. About an hour later, the strange wandering monk walked towards Ogawa Town while the heavy snow was still on.This person is Ama Minato.Warrior, singer, businessman, Taoist monk - he often changes his disguise and is a famous thief in the capital.I stared at him closely from behind, and the joy in my heart was never felt at that time.Grandma Gangjinnei, Grandma Gangjinnei, I yearn for him even in my dreams.It's Shinai who stole the big knife of Shasheng Guanbai. It's Shinai who cheated the coral tree from the Siam shop, and the one who cut and prepared the agarwood from the former prime minister's house, and the one who robbed the pocket watch of the foreign captain Pleira. He broke five pieces in one night. The one in the underground warehouse, the one who hacked to death the eight Mikawa samurai—in addition, the one who did many evil things that will be passed down from generation to generation are all this Ama Minato.This guy is now wearing a bamboo hat at a slant, walking forward on the shiny snow-just looking at him is a kind of happiness, and I want even greater happiness in my heart. When I got to the back of Jingyan Temple, I caught up with him.There are no houses here, just a long earthen wall, even in the daytime, it is the best place to avoid human eyes.Jinnai didn't panic when he saw me, he stood down calmly, holding a walking stick in his hand, waiting for me to speak, but he didn't make a sound.I made a bow to him timidly, looked at his calm face, and couldn't make a sound. "Ah, I'm sorry. I'm Yasaburo, the son of Hojo Ya Sanemon..." The fire shone on my face, and it was with difficulty that I opened my mouth. "I want to ask you something, I followed you because I envy you..." He nodded, but didn't speak.I was timid and excited, so I mustered up the courage to kneel down on the snow and told him that I was kicked out of the house by my father, and now I was degraded into a homeless person. I wanted to go home tonight and steal something, but I ran into You, I eavesdropped on your conversation with your father--I said these words briefly, and still remained silent, staring at me coldly.After that, I moved my knees forward and peeked at his eyes. "The Hojoya family has received your great kindness, and I am also the one who has received it. I will never forget you for the rest of my life, and I am determined to worship under your family. I can steal, I can also set fire, I do all bad things, and I am no worse than others... " But still silent.I was even more excited, and continued to say enthusiastically: "Please accept me as your apprentice, and I will try my best. Jingshi, Fushimi, Sakai, Osaka—I am familiar with all those places. I can run ninety miles a day. I can lift a 150-jin sack with my hand, and I have killed a few people. I will do whatever you tell me to do. If you want me to steal the white peacock in Fushimi, I will steal it. If you tell me to burn St. Francis Church I will burn the bell tower; if you tell me to turn right to the lady of the minister’s house, I will turn it; you want to execute the head of the official..." Before I finished speaking, he suddenly kicked me to the ground. "Bastard!" He yelled and walked away. I grabbed his cassock frantically: "Please take me in, I will not leave you no matter what, I will go for you. The lion king in the movie, Didn't you save a mouse? I'll just be the mouse, I..." "Shut up, I won't be rewarded by you." Even pushed me and I fell to the ground again. "You prodigal son, go and honor your old man!" When I fell the second time, I was filled with frustration. "But, I must repay the favor!" But Jinnai didn't look back, and hurriedly walked on the snow.At this time, there was already moonlight, casting the shadow of Ruo Li... For the next two years, I didn't see Jinnei (suddenly laughing). "I won't take any reward from you!"...he said so, but at dawn, I will behead him. Ah, the Virgin Mary!In the past two years, I have suffered so much in order to repay my kindness!For gratitude—no, for revenge, but where is it?What are you doing inside? —Does anyone know?No one even knew what Jinne was like.The fake monk I saw was a short man around forty years old; in Hana Liu Lane in Yanagi Town, he was a red-faced, bearded vagabond under thirty; A red-haired ghost with a bent back; when he robbed the treasures of Miaoguo Temple, he was said to be a young warrior who left the sea in front of his clothes-since these people are all insiders, it is beyond human ability to know his true face in Lushan of.Later, at the end of last year, I got sick with vomiting blood. I must have my revenge--my body is getting worse day by day, and that is all I can think of.One day, I had a sudden inspiration, and I came up with a clever plan.Ah, the Virgin Mary!It is your kindness that enabled me to conceive of this ingenious plan.I am determined to fight off this body, this frail body that suffers from hematemesis and is only skinny and bone--as long as I am determined to do so, I can achieve my wish.This night, I was so happy that I laughed alone, chanting the same words: "I will abandon this head instead of Jinne!" "Let me abandon this head instead of Jinne!"... Beheading Daijinei—is there a better way to repay a kindness in the world?In that way, all the evils of Jinnei will be wiped out with me, and from now on he can walk in the vast Japan with dignity.This price (laughs again)... I will become a generation of thieves overnight: when Luzon Zuzaemon's subordinates cut down the agarwood of the former prime minister, cheated the coral tree of the Siam shop, and broke Fushimi The city's treasury, killing eight Mikawa samurai—all the honors of Shone, become mine (third laugh).I not only helped Jinnei, but also wiped out Jinnei's name, I repaid my family's favor, and I also avenged myself—there is no more happy repayment in the world than this.Of course I laughed with joy that night—even now that I'm in prison, I can't help laughing! I decided on this clever plan, so I went into the palace to steal, slipped into the palace at night, saw the lights in the palace curtains, and saw the shadows of flowers in the pine forest outside the palace——I was prepared to jump off the top of the corridor Immediately, four or five guards jumped out of the palace courtyard where there was no one, and according to my wish, they arrested me at once.At this time, a bearded samurai on top of me tied me up with a rope and murmured, "This time, I finally caught Jinnai." Yes, except Grandma Minatojinnai, Who dares to enter the palace and steal?After hearing this, I couldn't help laughing while struggling desperately. "I don't take anything in return from you!" he said.But at dawn, I will behead him.What a delightful irony.I waited for him to come while my head was hanging on the street.From my head, he will hear a silent laugh: "Look, Yasaburo's retribution!" - In the laughter, he will say: "You are no longer Jinai, this head is Ama Kojinai, that The world-renowned number one thief in Japan!" (laughs) Ah, what a joy, such a joy can only be encountered once in a lifetime.If my father, Ya Sanemon, sees my head on display (pain), please forgive me, Dad!I have suffered from hematemesis, and even if my head does not fall to the ground, I will not live for three years. Please forgive my unfilial piety.Although I left this whirling world, after all, I have repaid my family's great kindness... Made in April 1922 Translated by Lou Shiyi April 1976