Chapter 50 Chapter 46 News

One evening, as I was thinking of a book I was writing—and, as I worked harder and more successfully, I had begun my first novel—I went for a walk by myself, On my return I passed Mrs Steerforth's house.If my scattered memories of dates are to be believed, I must have been married for a year or so by then.When I lived in that area, I often passed by there, but as long as there is another way to go around, I will definitely not go there.That being said, it's not easy to go around in a big circle, and it's not easy to go any other way, so on the whole, I pass there often. As I hurried past there, I made no further movement than to glance at the house.The dwelling had always been dreary and gloomy.The best rooms were not facing the street, and the old-fashioned narrow, thick-slatted windows, unpleasant in any way, always looked sadly closed, with their shutters always drawn.There is a small corridor through the stone-paved courtyard, leading to an entrance that has never been used. There is a special staircase round window, which is also the only window that is not covered by shutters, and it also reveals the desolation of no one. meteorological.I don't remember seeing a single light from the house.If I were a passer-by who happened to pass by here, I would probably think that a lonely old man with no children died in it.If I had been fortunate enough to know nothing of the place, and to see it always unchanged, I guess I should have gratified my fancy with many fantastic speculations.

In fact, I try to think about it as little as possible.My mind doesn't walk through it and leave it behind like my body does, though.I have often had many meditations on it.In the day and night I am talking about, there are vague ghosts of hope, vague afterimages of disappointment, and the interlacing of experience and imagination in my ups and downs of thoughts, plus memories of childhood and fantasies about the future. All mixed up and wandering before my eyes.In this case, the house is especially evocative of associations.I was in deep thought as I walked past it, when a voice beside me startled me.

It was still a woman's voice.I immediately remembered that this was the little maid in Mrs Steerforth's drawing room.There used to be blue ribbons on her hat, but now they've all been taken off, and only a knot or two of dark brown which is dull to look at; this, I guess, is also to accommodate the change in the house. "Excuse me, sir, would you go in and talk to Miss Dartle?" "Did Miss Dartle send you to see me?" I asked. "Not tonight, sir, but just the same. Miss Dartle saw you passing a night or two ago, and told me to sit on the stairs and watch, and invite you in to talk to her when you passed again."

I turned back, and as we went on I asked my guide if Mrs Steerforth was all right.She said her master was not very nice and often stayed in her own room. When we came to the house she pointed out to me Miss Dartle in the garden, and I went to see her myself.She was sitting on a seat at one end of a large terrace, looking at the huge city in the distance.The night was overcast, with a dead gray light in the sky.I looked into the darkened distance, and here and there in the dim light I could see some huge protrusions.I imagined this as a co-created backdrop to commemorate this fierce woman. When I approached, she saw me and bowed to greet me.She was paler and thinner, I thought, than the last time I saw her, her eyes shone brighter, and the scar was more pronounced.

There was nothing cordial about our meeting.The last time we broke up angrily; she had a look of contempt, which she didn't hide. "I hear you wish to speak to me, Miss Dartle," said I, standing not far from her, leaning on the back of my chair, and declining her gesture to sit down. "Excuse me," she said, "excuse me, has the girl been found?" "No." "She ran away again." As she looked at me, I saw her thin lips move, as if eager to throw a curse at Emily. "Run away?" I repeated. "Yes! From him," she said, laughing, "if she hasn't been found, maybe she won't be found again. Maybe she's dead."

She had a look of triumphant cruelty such as I had never seen on any face. "Wishing her dead," said I, "is perhaps the kindest wish one of her own sex could have for her. Time has softened you so much, Miss Dartle, I am glad." She refrained from ignoring her, but turned to me with a contemptuous smile and said: "Any friend of that fine victim girl is your friend. You are their fighter and their rights. Would you like to know how she is?" "Think." I said. She stood up with an ugly smile, walked a few steps towards the nearby hedge that separated the lawn from the vegetable bed, and cried, "Come here!" as if she were calling to a dirty animal.

"You're not here to be a fighter and take revenge, are you, Mr. Copperfield?" she said, looking back at me with the same expression. I bow my head.Don't know what she meant.So she said again, "Come here!" and came back with the respectable Mr. Li Timer.Mr. Litimer bowed to me with his old dignity, and stood behind Miss Dartle.Miss Dartle leaned back on the chair between us and stared at me.Her vicious and smug look was that of some cruel princess of legend; but strangely enough, there was something feminine about it. "Here," she said haughtily, without looking at him, feeling her old scar that trembled (the tremor was perhaps more from pride than from pain now), "tell Copperfield about running away. gentlemen."

"Mr. James and I, Miss—" "Don't tell me!" She frowned and stopped him. "Mr. James and I, sir—" "Please don't tell me either," I said. Mr. Li Timo did not lose his composure at all. He bowed slightly and said that what we are most satisfied with is also what he is most satisfied with, and then said: "Mr. James and I have lived abroad with the little girl since she left Yarmouth under Mr. James' protection. We have been to many places and seen many countries. We have been to France, Switzerland, Italy, and in fact , almost everywhere."

He stared at the back of the chair as if speaking to the back of the chair.Then he played lightly with his hand on it, as if he were strumming the strings of a silent piano. "Mr. James did love that little woman. For quite a long time he was in the most settled state I have ever seen in his service. The little woman was very civilized, and could speak all languages ​​unrecognizable." She was a country bumpkin. From what I can see, she was praised wherever we went." Miss Dartle put a hand on her waist.I saw him sneak a glance at her and smiled secretly. "Really, that little woman is much admired. Either for her dress, or for the sun and the air, or for being so valued, or for this, or for that, she does have her merits noticed."

He stopped for a moment.She looked at the distant scenery with disturbed eyes, and bit her lower lip to stop the quivering of her mouth. Mr. Litimer removed his hands from the chair, took one hand and held the other, put his weight on one leg, and stretched his respectable head slightly forward and to one side, his eyes still looking down. said: "The little woman lived like this for a while, and sometimes seemed moody. Later, I think it was her moodiness and that kind of temper that got Mr. James tired, and things didn't go so well, James. The mister was restless again. The more restless he was, the worse she was; and I should say, personally, I had a hard time between them. That's the way it is, mending it, I Believe me, it will last longer than anyone imagined."

Miss Dartle withdrew her eyes from a distance, and looked at me again with the same expression as before.Li Timo covered his mouth and coughed twice to clear his throat, shifted his weight to the other leg and said: "Later, when the quarreling and scolding had become too much, Mr. James set off early one morning from near Naples (where we had a villa, because the little lady liked the sea), and said he would be back in a day or two, and told It was my duty to break the truth to her. For the happiness of both parties, he—" Here he coughed again, "is gone. I must say, however, that Mr. James' conduct was very honorable; for he proposed, That little woman ought to marry a very respectable man who has done her no wrong, and who is at least as good as anyone this little woman could ordinarily marry, for her relatives are mean." He switched legs again and licked his lips.I believed the rascal was speaking of himself, and I saw confirmation of this in Miss Dartle's face. "It is up to me to explain that too. I would do anything to relieve Mr. James, and to reconcile him with his kind mother, who has endured so much for him. So I take it upon myself. That great trust. After I told the truth about his leaving, the little woman woke up unexpectedly violently. She was completely crazy, and she had to be held down very hard, or she would kill herself with a knife, or jump into the sea, or face Hitting the head on the stone floor." Miss Dartle, reclining in her chair, looked ecstatic, almost expressing her liking for the fellow's voice. "However, when I spoke of the second part of my commission," said Mr. Litimer, rubbing his hands uneasily, "the little woman, instead of being so grateful for the arrangement as is commonly supposed, showed her I've never seen a more bullshit person. Her behavior is shockingly bad. She has no more gratitude, affection, patience, and reason than a piece of wood or stone. If I'm not careful, I'm sure I'll be She kills." "That's why I respect her all the more," I said bitterly. Mr. Litimer bowed his head as if to say, "Is that so, sir? But you're still young!" and went on with his report. "In short, there was a period of time when everything around her that could harm herself or others had to be removed, and she should be kept in tight confinement. Although this was done, she ran away at night. She pushed A pane, nailed by me myself, fell to the trellis of vines below. Since then, as far as I know, no one has seen or heard of her." "She's probably dead," said Miss Dartle, smiling, as if she might kick at the victimized girl's body. "Perhaps she drowned herself, miss," replied Mr. Lytimer, seizing an opportunity of addressing someone, "very likely. Otherwise, she would have the help of the boatmen and their wives and children. Used to it, she always liked to go to the seaside and talk to them, Miss Dartle, and sit beside their boat all day. I saw her do it all day long when Mr. James was away. Once, Mr. James It displeased Mr. James to find that she had said to the children that she was a boatman's daughter, and that she played on the beach like them in her own country long ago." Oh, Emily!Poor beauty!I seem to see her sitting on the beach in the distance, sitting with children who are like her when she was young, thinking that if she married a poor man, there would be a small voice calling her mother, and listening to the eternal song Sighing the rumbling sound of "Never Returning", what kind of picture is this! "When all is clear and there is nothing more to do, Miss Dartle—" "Did I tell you not to talk to me?" she said sharply, not without contempt. "You did, madam," he replied, "I beg your pardon. But it is my duty to obey." "Do your part," she said quickly, "finish your story and get out of here!" "Everything is clear," said he, with a most unseemly air, and bowed meekly. "She cannot be found, and I shall go to see Mr. James at the place of correspondence, and report what has happened. Report everything to him. We got into an argument. I think I should leave him for the sake of my dignity. I could, and have been, a lot of Mr. James; but he insulted me too much. He hurt It broke my heart. Knowing now of their unfortunate antagonism between mother and son, and knowing how much grief she was likely to suffer, I ventured back to England to report—" "Give him money for me," Miss Dartle said to me. "Exactly, ma'am—report what I know. I can't recall it," said Mr. Litimer, after a moment's thought, "and what else. I'm out of work at the moment, and I hope to find a decent job. " Miss Dartle gave me a look as if to ask if I had any questions. Because I happened to think of one thing, I said: "I want to ask this—guy," I couldn't force myself to use more polite words, "did they withhold the letter from her family, or did he think she got that letter?" He remained calm and silent, staring at the ground, skillfully pressing each fingertip of his right hand against each fingertip of his left hand. Miss Dartle turned her head to him contemptuously. "I'm sorry, miss," he said, coming out of his meditation, "but, though I am obedient to you, and though I am a servant, I have my place. You are different, Mr. Copperfield and Miss. If Mr. Copperfield Desiring to ask something from me, I took the liberty of reminding Mr. Copperfield that he could put his questions to me. I have a personality that should remain. " After some mental struggle, I turned my eyes to him and said, "You have heard my question, and you can take it as addressed to you. How are you going to answer it?" "Sir," he replied, opening and closing his fingertips deftly, "I will answer within limits, because telling Mr. James's secret to his mother is a very different thing from telling you. I do not think that Mr. James would generally like to receive a letter which heightens his gloominess and unhappiness; but that is all, sir, and I shall say no more." "Nothing else?" Miss Dartle asked me. I said, I have nothing more to say. "Only one thing," I added, seeing him leave, "is that I know the part this fellow played in this crime, and, because I'm going to tell it all to the honest man who's been her father since she was a child." People, I advise him not to show his face outside." When I started to speak, he stopped and listened as calmly as ever. "Thank you, sir. But please forgive me for saying so, sir, there are no slaves in this country, and there are no masters, and lynchings are strictly prohibited. If they did, I believe, they would risk more than anyone else. After all, I Not afraid to go anywhere, sir." So saying, he bowed respectfully to me, and to Miss Dartle, and went out by the hedge arch by which he had come.Miss Dartle and I looked at each other in silence for a moment; her attitude was exactly the same as when she had called the man out. "Besides," she said, pursing her upper lip slowly, "his master, he has heard, is sailing the coast of Spain; concern. Between those two proud beings, that is, between mother and child, the gulf widened wider than ever, with little hope of making it up, for both were alike at the bottom of their hearts, and time had only made them both More obstinate, more arrogant. That's not your concern; but it leads me to what I'm about to say. The devil you see as an angel, I'm talking about that nasty one he picked up in the mud by the sea Woman," she opened those dark eyes to me, and held up her passionate fingers, "perhaps alive—for, I believe, some inferior things do not die easily. If she lives, you must find Keep a close eye on that baby. We want that too, lest she get another chance to seduce him. We're all on the same page on this one; so I—want to give her the palpable hurt this numb bad thing feels. I—send for you to hear what you have heard." I knew from her face that someone had come behind me.That was Mrs Steerforth.She held out her hand to me much colder than (the old days), and her solemnity has also increased a lot.But I saw—and was moved by it—that she still couldn't get over my old love for her son.She has changed a lot, her slim figure is no longer as straight as before, her handsome face has deep wrinkles, and her hair is almost completely white.But when she sat down in the chair, she was still a lady of good manners; and I still remember, when I was a schoolboy, I used her proud and bright eyes as a guiding light in my dreams. "Have you told Mr. Copperfield all about it, Rosa?" "yes." "Did he hear Li Timo's words directly?" "Yes, I have told him why you wanted him to know." "You are a good girl," she continued to me, "and I have exchanged several letters with your former friend, sir, but I have not been able to bring him back to his sense of duty and filial piety. Therefore, in this respect , I have no other purpose than that, as Rosa said. I hope, with a kind of person who may bring you here (I am sorry for him, but I only want to I can say so much) to ease my worries and keep my son from falling into a trap set by an enemy, that's good." She straightened up and sat there, looking straight into the distance. "Madame," I said politely, "I understand. I assure you I do not misunderstand your motives. But even to you I should explain, since I have known that wounded Family, I know her well. If you think that the girl who suffered so much humiliation was not cruelly deceived, and would now take a glass of water from her son, you are very wrong. She would rather Wouldn't do that even if I died a hundred times." "All right, Rosa, all right!" said Mrs. Steerforth, stopping Rosa who was about to say something. "That's all right. Let it go. I hear, sir, are you married?" I replied that I had been married for a long time. "Is it all right? In the quiet life I lead, it's hard to hear anything. But I know, you're starting to become famous. " "It's a lucky thing for me," I said, "to get some compliments." "You have no mother?"—she asked softly. "No." "It's a pity," she said quickly, "she'd be proud of you, sir. Good-bye!" She held out her hand with haughty obstinacy, and I took it.In my hand, her hand is very calm, as if her heart is also very peaceful.Her pride seemed to stop the pulse in her hands and cast a veil over her face.She sat there, looking straight into the distance from behind a veil. As I walked away from them along the terrace, I couldn't help watching how the two of them sat there gazing ahead, how the twilight around them thickened and merged.In that distant city, some earlier lights flickered there; in the eastern sky, there was still a dead gray light, but from the vast expanse that lay between the city and them From the broad valley rose a sea-like mist; and this mist mingled with darkness, and swallowed them like sea water.I do remember all this, and I do think of it with terror, for when I saw them again a billowing sea of ​​mist was already at their feet. Thinking over what I had heard, I thought I ought to tell Mr. Peggotty.The next night I went to see him in London.He went from here to there with the sole object of getting his niece back, but still he stayed more in London than anywhere else.Countless times in those days I saw him walking down the street in the dead of night, trying to find someone he wanted but dreaded among the few people still wandering out at that inopportune hour. Upstairs in the little grocer in Hungerford Market he kept a lodging, which I have mentioned several times.It was from there that his benevolent career began.I go there.When I inquired, I heard from people in the store that he hadn't gone out yet, and I could find him upstairs in his room. He is sitting in front of a window reading, and there are some flowers and plants he planted on the windowsill.The room was clean and tidy.I could tell at a glance that the room was always ready for her.Every time he went out, there was always hope that he could bring her home.I knocked, but he didn't hear; he didn't look up until I put my hand on his shoulder. "Master Wei! Thank you, young master! Thank you for your kindness to come to see me! Thank you so much! please sit down.You are very welcome, sir. " "Mr. Peggotty," said I, taking the chair from him, "don't expect too much! I've heard some news." "About Emily!" He put his hand to his mouth excitedly.When he looked into my eyes seriously, his face turned pale. "The news gave no clue as to where she was, but she was no longer with him." He sat down, looked at me intently, and listened to what I said silently and calmly.As he gradually turned his eyes away from my face, and looked down with his forehead resting on his hand, I was greatly moved by the patience of his solemn face, which gave it a dignity and even a beauty which I have never seen before. still remember.He didn't break in and say a word, and he didn't move.He seemed to be chasing after her figure through my narration, and let all other figures go, as if none of them existed. After I finished speaking, he still covered his face and said nothing.I looked out the window for a while, and then I looked at the flowers and plants. "What do you think of this, Master Wei?" he finally asked. "I think she's alive," I replied. "I don't know. Maybe the first thing hit her too hard, and her mind was in turmoil again—! She used to talk about the blue water. Did she think of it all those years ago because it was her place of burial?" While thinking, he said this in a low voice of surprise, and then walked up and down in the small room. "But," he went on, "Master Wei, I used to feel that she must be alive—I believed I could find her, whether asleep or awake—that used to guide me, support me—I Don't believe I'm being duped! No! Emily's alive!" He put his hand firmly on the table, with a firm expression on his dark face. "My niece, Emily, is alive, sir!" he said firmly. "I don't know where and how I heard it, but I hear she's alive!" When he said that, he looked like a man under the influence of the Holy Spirit.I waited while he was not paying much attention to me, and then I explained to him what I had thought to be advisable last night. "Here, my dear friend—" I began. "Thank you, thank you, good sir," he said, taking my hand in both of his. "If she comes to London—which is possible, because where is it so easy to hide in such a large city? If she doesn't come home, what can she expect to do but hide?—" "She won't come home," he broke in, shaking his head sadly. "If she had gone away willingly, she would have come back; but it is not so, so she won't come back, sir." "If she gets here," said I, "I'm sure there's one here who'll find her more easily than anyone else. Remember--keep yourselves and listen to me, and think of your own great purpose!-- Do you remember Martha?" "In our town?" Once I saw his face, I didn't have to answer any more. "Did you know she was in London?" "I saw her in the street," he replied, trembling. "You don't know, though," I said, "that Emily, with Ham's help, helped her before she went away. You don't know either, when we met one night in a roadside house talking , she listened outside the door." "Master Wei?" He immediately said in amazement, "On a night when it's snowing so heavily?" "It was that night. But since then, I haven't seen her again; after I broke up with you, I went back to talk to her, but she had already left. At that time, I didn't want to talk about her to you, I don't want to now either; but she's the one I'm talking about, and I think we should talk to her, you understand?" "Quite clear, sir," he answered.We have lowered our voices, almost to whispers.We talked quietly like that. "You said you'd seen him. Do you think you could find her? I just hoped to meet her by chance." "I think, Master Wei, I know where to find her." "It's getting dark. Now that we're together, can we go out now and find her tonight?" He agreed and was ready to go with me.As I watched him calmly, he carefully tidied up the little room, got the candles ready as well as their lighting, made the bed, and then took out of a drawer one of her clothes (I remember seeing She wore this dress), folded it with some other clothes, took out a bonnet, and put them all on a chair.He doesn't talk about these clothes, and neither do I.Undoubtedly, these clothes have been waiting for her for many, many nights. "In the past, Master Weiss," said he, when we came downstairs, "I almost looked upon that Martha girl as dirt at my Emily's feet. God forgive me, it's different now!" As we walked down the road, half to talk to him, and half to satisfy myself, I asked him how Ham was.His answer was almost exactly the same as in the past, and Ham was still the same, "Live as if you don't care about his life; but never complain, everyone likes him." I asked him what he thought Ham thought of the cause of their misfortune?Is there any danger?What, for example, did he think Ham would do once he met Steerforth? "I don't know, sir," he answered, "I've often thought of that question, but I can't figure it out." I remember what happened to Ham when the three of us came to the beach the morning after she left. "Do you remember," I said, "that he looked out to sea like he was crazy, and said 'what happened'?" "Of course I do!" he said. "What do you think he meant by that?" "Master Wei," he replied, "I have asked myself this question many times, but I can't find an answer. There is something strange—I don't seem to feel comfortable asking him, even if he He has such a good temper. He used to be very respectful to me when he spoke to me, and he won't change his attitude now, but his thoughts are hard to fathom. His thoughts are deep, young master, I can't fathom." "You're right," I said, "that sometimes makes me anxious too." "Me too, Young Master Wei," he went on immediately, "to be honest, this worries me more than his taking risks, although both are changes in his mind. I don't believe he would use force under any circumstances." , but I hope the two of them don't run into each other." We walked through Temple Bar and into town.At that time, he stopped talking; instead, he walked beside me, thinking of his only purpose in life.His manner of concentration made him seem quite alone in the crowd.When we were not far from the Black Clergy Bridge, he turned his head and pointed to the shadow of a woman passing by alone across the street, and I knew it—this was the woman we were looking for. We crossed the street and chased after her.At this time, it suddenly occurred to me that if I talked to her in a quieter place with fewer people and less attention, she might be more likely to develop a grown woman's concern for the girl who has gone astray.So, I persuaded my partner not to say anything to her, but to follow her; and I also had a vague idea of ​​where she was going. Once he agreed, we followed at a distance, not letting her go out of sight or getting too close as she looked around from time to time.Once, she stopped to listen to a band, and we stopped too. She goes a long way.We are still following.The way she walked indicated that she was going to a place she frequented; in addition, she did not leave the busy street, and perhaps the mystery of following a person all strengthened my original idea.At last she turned into a dark, remote street, from which noise and crowds were thrown out.So I said, "Now we can talk to her;" and we hurried towards her.