Chapter 4 Section 3 Family Education and Training

The family is the cell that constitutes a society and a country. When a person is born into the world, the first contact is the members of the family, such as parents, brothers, sisters, grandpas, grandmas, uncles, uncles, aunts and others.In childhood, people grow up under the careful nurturing and love of their parents, and gradually become sensible while playing games with their brothers and sisters.Whether a person can become a useful person when he grows up has a lot to do with the influence of parents, siblings and other members of the family, as well as the influence of the family's surrounding environment.In ancient China, there was an adage that "it is the father's fault to raise or not teach", which means that parents who give birth to children without educating them are irresponsible and should be condemned.In ancient China, there were also stories of "Meng's mother moved three times" and "Meng's mother broke weaving", which are more illustrative.The previous story said that when Mencius was a child, his home address was close to a cemetery at first, and the young Mencius played among the tombs, imitating how people dig the ground to build graves, sweep graves and burn paper.His mother thought that this was not a game that children should play, and it was very detrimental to his son's growth, so he moved quickly.The newly moved address is near the market, where there are peddlers who come and go. Affected by the environment, the young Mencius began to imitate the merchants and play the game of doing business.Meng's mother thought that this was not a game that children should play, and it was not good for her son's growth, so she decided to move again.The new residence this time is next to a school palace. The sound of reading and the teacher teaching students how to perform sacrifices and the etiquette of bowing and retreating attracted the young Mencius, and he began to learn what these scholars should do.At this time, Mother Meng said happily that this is a good place for us to live.Since then, I have settled down there and never moved again.The latter story says that when Mencius was a child, he came back from school and said that studying was too boring, and expressed his desire to stop studying.At this time, Mencius's mother was weaving.After hearing what her son said, she immediately picked up the scissors and cut off the cloth she was weaving.Mencius was taken aback, and asked his mother why she had to cut off the fine cloth.Mother Meng said, if you want to stop learning, it is as if I cut off the cloth we are weaving.Learning is a matter of increasing knowledge. It enables people to know how to judge right and wrong, and grows into a useful person. How can it stop halfway?This is just like how I weave cloth. I have to weave the cloth inch by inch before I can sew it into clothes. If I cut the cloth halfway through weaving, I can't make clothes.Mencius listened to his mother's contrasting inspirational education, and realized that it was wrong to stop studying halfway. From then on, he studied diligently and did not dare to slack off. Finally, he grew into a master of Confucianism who inherited Confucius' theories. Together with Confucius, he is called Confucius. Meng.These two stories related to Mencius illustrate that family education is closely related to a person's success, and the environment around the family residence also has a major impact on a person's success.Mother Meng was the one who understood these truths earlier in Chinese history. She gave Mencius a good family education and also chose a good family environment for Mencius.

After Meng Mu, there are many stories in Chinese history that emphasize family education, which has formed a good social atmosphere.When a person does not perform well in social activities, he is often denounced as "lack of family upbringing" and "no family education". The purpose of family education is to hope that children will become talents when they grow up, and not become useless waste.The family education of the upper class in ancient China was mainly to encourage their children to study, because studying and becoming an official was their only way out.Deng Yu of the Han Dynasty was able to recite at the age of 13. He met his classmate Liu Xiu when he was studying in Chang'an.Later, he followed Liu Xiu in the uprising against Wang Mang's usurpation of power, fought in the South and North for many years, and finally helped Liu Xiu establish the Eastern Han regime.Liu Xiu was Emperor Guangwu of the Han Dynasty, who made Deng Yu Marquis of Gaomi.In view of the stability of the world, Deng Yu could no longer rely on horseback riding and archery to gallop across the battlefield, so he taught his 13 sons that each of them must specialize in a skill as the foundation of governing the country.The "art" mentioned by the ancients refers to the "six arts", that is, the six arts of rites, music, archery, imperialism, calligraphy, and counting, or refers to, "Shangshu", "Book of Changes", "Spring and Autumn", "Zhou Li", " The Book of Music, six Confucian classics.If you master one of the six arts, you can be an official if you have specialized skills.Among them, archery and imperial defense are archery and horseback riding, which are the skills that military commanders must be proficient in.If you want to be proficient, you have to practice hard, so that you can practice with great accuracy and speed.Ritual, music, books, and mathematics refer to court etiquette, music, writing, mathematics and other specialized knowledge, which require hard study and practice before they can be mastered proficiently.What Deng Yu meant was to teach his sons to exercise hard and study hard, and each of them specialize in a certain knowledge as the capital for standing in the world.Only in this way can one be an official, have a social status, and have a secure life.Since Deng Yu's goal of educating his sons was very clear and easy to follow, most of his 13 sons later mastered a skill in their youth and became talented and made contributions to the country.Deng Yu's family education has always been a good story in history.

The knowledge and talents of Jia Huangzhong, a famous honest official in the Song Dynasty, benefited from the strict discipline of his father Jia Yu (pin poor) when he was young.Since Jia Huangzhong was five years old, his father asked him to stand in the study room every morning and measure his height with the open scrolls. It's called "The Book of Equal Body".They were not allowed to eat or sleep until they finished reading the body books.Jia Huangzhong obeyed his father's teaching very much, and he could finish reading the body books every day, so he passed the children's department at the age of six, and he was able to write articles with beautiful words and sentences at the age of seven, and he was also able to compose poems and fu.Jia Tun also stipulated that his son was only allowed to eat vegetables, not meat.He said to Jia Huangzhong: "Only those who have achieved success in their careers can eat meat. As long as you study hard, you will have a successful career in the future, and there are many opportunities to eat meat." Jia Huangzhong also followed his father's teachings, Although I eat vegetables every day, I have no complaints.At the age of 15, he passed the Jinshi examination and was awarded the title of "Golden Scholar" and other officials. He became a very prestigious official as early as his youth.Later, Jia Huangzhong served as the prefect of several states, and also presided over the imperial examination.Everywhere he went, he left a reputation of integrity and integrity, and became a very famous honest official in the Song Dynasty.

Ouyang Xiu, a litterateur in the Song Dynasty, benefited from his mother's family education when he was young.Ouyang Xiu's father died since he was a child, and his family was very poor.His mother had to take him away from home to seek refuge with his uncle who was an official far away.The uncle has a low official position and a small income. The burden on the family is heavy, and the economy is not rich. He can only provide for the mother and son to eat a simple meal, but cannot afford Ouyang Xiu to go to school.When it was time for Ouyang Xiu to go to school, he didn't even have the money to buy paper and pens, let alone the money to pay the teacher (that is, tuition fees).Therefore, the mother had no choice but to break some reed poles to use as pens, spread the sand on the ground as paper, and teach Ouyang Xiu to read and write by herself.Under the education of his mother, Ouyang Xiu studied very hard. He could recognize, read and write dozens of characters a day. When he was 10 years old, he had the ability of self-study.So, his mother took him begging everywhere to borrow books from people with books to read, and urged him to recite or copy the contents of the book.After years of hard work, Ouyang Xiu read many books under the education of his mother, which laid a solid foundation for him to become a writer later.Coupled with his own hard work and the influence of his mentors and friends after entering the society, he finally became a famous writer as one of the "Eight Great Men of Tang and Song Dynasties".The story of Ouyang Xiu's mother Lu Di teaching her son has always been praised as a model of family education.

Book knowledge acquired by reading is an indispensable capital for the ancients to "be good at learning and become an official". However, if you want to be an upright and good official, you can't just rely on book knowledge. You must also have a certain amount of moral cultivation. , understand the truth that officials love the people, and the people can support the officials.Therefore, the family education of the ancients often included the content of moral education.Yin Zhongkan of the Jin Dynasty understood the truth of this aspect very well.He himself studied very hard in his early years, and he especially liked to read the book "A Treatise on Morals".Later, he became the governor of Jingzhou, where floods and droughts have been plagued by successive years, and the people are very poor.In order to educate his children to care about the sufferings of the people, Yin Zhongkan grew up to be an upright official loved by the people, and he himself set an example by saving money and food.Every meal in his family is just enough to eat, and there are no leftovers to throw away. If the rice grains are dropped on the table during the meal, they must be picked up and eaten.He said to his children: "Others saw that I was a senior official of the governor, and thought that I would definitely change my past frugal habits. In fact, I am used to living a poor life. How can I forget my roots when I am a senior official? I hope you can Continue to maintain a frugal style of work!" Although Yin Zhongkan himself took a detour in the political struggle at that time, the ending was regrettable, but the moral education he provided to his children in the family played an important role.His eldest son, Yin Jianzhi, became a talent at a young age. He continued to fight against his father's political opponents, won the victory, and finally died for the country.The second son, Yin Kuangzhi, became a talent at a young age. When he became an official in Shancheng (now Shengxian County, Zhejiang Province), he kept his father's frugal style and was loved by the local people.

Zhao Gui of the Sui Dynasty also paid great attention to moral education for his children.He himself was eager to learn when he was young, with good conduct. When he grew up, he became an official, and his life was still very poor.There is a mulberry tree in the east of his house, and the mature mulberries often fall in the courtyard of his house.He asked his son to carefully pick up the mulberries and returned them to his neighbors. He said to his son: "I am not seeking a name from this, and I do not want to invade others. You should take it as a warning." ("Sui Dynasty" "Book" Volume 73 "Xun Li · Zhao Gui Biography") These few sentences mean: "I did not do this to gain fame and hope to get praise from others, but to think that this is not something we have achieved through hard work, and we cannot do it. Feel free to take things that belong to others. I hope you will always remember what I taught you.” Zhao Gui’s moral education to his son was deeply imprinted in his mind. His two sons, Zhao Hongan and Zhao Hongzhi, both It was a young man who became a talent and became a well-known figure at that time.

Cheng, the mother of Su Shi, a famous writer in the Song Dynasty, was good at educating her children with historical stories.Su Shi's father, Su Xun, often traveled to study abroad and was away from home for a long time, so the responsibility of educating his children fell on Cheng's shoulders.One day, Cheng taught Su Shi to read "Book of the Later Han Dynasty: Biography of Fan Pang".She first talked about Fan Pang's righteous behavior of restraining the powerful, hating the evil, and opposing the eunuch's monopoly. Then she talked about Fan Pang's arrest, his mother sent him on the road, and asked him to maintain his integrity. People admire integrity, it’s really amazing!" Su Shi was deeply touched by his mother's vivid and touching narration. He leaned in his mother's arms and said, "Mom! If I grow up to be like Fan Pang, would you like it?" Cheng was very happy to hear her son say this. She stroked Su Shi's back and said, "If you can be like Fan Pang, why can't I learn from Fan Pang's mother!" Su Shi firmly remembered his mother's teachings. in mind.Later, because of his integrity, he suffered repeated setbacks when he was an official, but he always took Fan Pang as a model and maintained integrity, and finally became a great writer whose conduct, talent and learning can serve as a model for future generations.

Family education is very important for a teenager to become a talent. The most touching story is "Tattooing of Mother-in-law".When Yue Fei was a child, a large area of ​​land north of the Yellow River had already been occupied by the Jin people, and only half of the land was left in the Song Dynasty.The broad masses of the people deeply felt the pain of the country being ruined and their families were ruined, and they threw themselves into the battle of defending their families one after another.Yue Fei's mother tattooed the four characters "serving the country with loyalty" on Yue Fei's back in order to let her son remember his responsibility to the country and the nation.These four words not only remained on Yue Fei's skin, but also deeply imprinted in Yue Fei's mind.From then on, he trained hard and finally grew into a famous anti-gold general.Later, Qin Hui framed Yue Fei and sent an official named He Zhu to interrogate him.Yue Fei resolutely denied the false accusation against him. He tore off his clothes in public in court, and showed He Zhu the words "serve the country with all sincerity" on his back.

The mother of Ming Dynasty writer Gui Youguang, Mrs. Zhou, also knew how to educate her children on morality.She set an example by teaching her children to be thrifty.Guijia is a well-off family, and Gui Youguang's grandfather's family is very rich, and they can often send money and goods here, so that the young Gui Youguang and his brothers and sisters live happily.Although the Zhou family has no worries about firewood, rice, oil and salt, they still work hard every day spinning and weaving, and don't rest until late at night.She also asked the maidservant to mix the charcoal left over from the stove in winter with water, and dry it to make good charcoal.Everything in the house that can be repaired and continued to be used is never thrown away as waste.The Zhou family also pays close attention to their children's studies. Sometimes when they wake up in the middle of the night, they find that they have not asked their son to recite the book, so they wake up Gui Youguang and make him read "Book of Filial Piety" silently. .Although Gui Youguang was only eight years old when his mother died, his mother's education had been deeply imprinted in his mind, which made him never forget it. He knew that he should be thrifty and study hard.It was precisely because of his mother's education that Gui Youguang became a talented young man and became a famous writer in the middle of the Ming Dynasty.

Qi Jiguang, a famous anti-Japanese general in the Ming Dynasty, received a good moral education from his father when he was young.Once during the New Year, Qi Jiguang went to pay New Year's greetings to his grandmother, who gave his beloved grandson a pair of beautiful shoes made of silk and satin.Qi Jiguang was very happy, so he put on the shoes and went to show his father.Seeing his son's happy appearance, the father reprimanded him severely: "You only knew how to love beauty when you were young, and you wore such good shoes. When you grow up, you will become more extravagant and wasteful. Eat well, wear well, and use your own money." If they don’t have enough, they will deduct the soldiers’ salaries and break the law. I didn’t know hardship and simplicity since I was a child, so how can I share weal and woe with others in the future!” Qi Jiguang was forced to take off his new shoes.Although Qi Jiguang was very sad at the time, he even cried for a while, but when he was 10 to 17 years old, his mother and father passed away one after another, and life at home was very difficult. At this time, he realized that the lesson his father taught him when he was young was very important. Quite rightly, one should not live a life of luxury.Later, Qi Jiguang was ordered to lead troops to fight against the harassment of Japanese pirates. From the battle against Japanese pirates, he saw with his own eyes that some troops led by officers were not strong in combat effectiveness and often suffered defeats. When he learned about it, he realized that these officers often deducted soldiers' pay, so the soldiers refused to listen. Command, poor discipline.At this time, Qi Jiguang remembered his father's lesson again, and realized that the lesson was really meaningful.Therefore, he was very strict with himself, and he shared weal and woe with the soldiers everywhere, and trained the Qi family army he led into a team with close unity and strong combat effectiveness, and made contributions to protecting the country and fighting the Japanese.

Normally, family education is carried out by parents, but historically there have also been people who were educated by uncles or other elders in the family.During the Northern and Southern Dynasties, the three brothers Zhou Hongzheng, Zhou Hongrang, and Zhou Hongzhi lived between the Liang Dynasty and Chen Dynasty in the Southern Dynasties. Their father died when they were young, and they were raised by their uncle Zhou She (sheshe).Zhou She was very strict in educating his nephews, educating them not to rely on their natural talents, but to study hard so that they can grow into useful people.Zhou Hongzheng was studying hard under the strict education of his uncle. He had mastered Laozi and Zhouyi at the age of 10. At the age of 15, he continued to study as a student and at the same time worked as a teacher to teach the course of "Zhouyi" to students.Before long, he was appointed a Ph.D.Zhou Hongrang is also a talented young man, erudite and versatile, an official and professional.Zhou Hongzhi, like his elder brother Hongzheng, became a doctor of imperial studies in his youth. Ding Henian, a famous Hui poet in the Ming Dynasty, lost his father when he was young, and the burden of family education fell on the shoulders of his sister Yue'e.Yue'e is bright, quiet, and talented, and she became her younger brother's first teacher.Every morning, Yue'e got up early, woke up her younger brother, taught He Nian how to read characters word by word, and taught He Nian to read the Four Books and Five Classics sentence by sentence.When He Nian neglected his studies because of his naughtiness, Yue'e reprimanded him mercilessly and guided his younger brother to the right path.The sister's painstaking teaching moved the younger brother very much. He Nian developed the habit of studying hard since he was a child, which laid a solid foundation in his studies.Later, he studied at Nanhu Academy and finished reading Confucian classics such as "Shangshu" and "Three Rites" very early. He grew into a famous poet in his youth, which has a lot to do with the enlightenment education his sister gave him in his early years. of. The long feudal society has formed a deep family concept in the Chinese people, which is not conducive to social progress in some aspects, but from the perspective of family education, the family concept makes the elders in the family think that they have an inescapable responsibility for the education of the younger generation. Responsibility, which is very beneficial to the growth of young people.For those whose parents are still alive, family education is carried out by their parents.For those who lost their parents at an early age, their grandparents, uncles, uncles, and even maternal grandparents, uncles, and other elders will automatically undertake the family education of the child and help him grow into a useful person.Limited to the knowledge and ideological level of the elders, there may be some negative factors in family education, such as educating children to be prudent, self-serving, etc., which is not conducive to the success of young people. However, most parents and other elders hope that their children and younger generations will Those who can stand out and shine in the family.Most of the family education they have given to their children and younger generations is correct and positive education worthy of recognition.This is undoubtedly a very favorable external factor for the success of young people in ancient China.

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