Chapter 99 Ulan Toya's words

"Teacher, the tears on my face are not tears of pain; the sweat on my body is not the sweat of fatigue! These are the tears and sweat flowing from the excited and excited heart! "Teacher, my legs are no longer sore or painful. Ayigul and Tsering Drolma have been rubbing for me for a long time. They were very happy to see my feet raised higher. They just left... …"If you must rub it for me, then let me tell you my own story at this time! "I was born in Golmud County, Haixi Prefecture, Qinghai Province. I was the daughter of a Mongolian cadre on a ranch. My father was a demobilized soldier. My mother also worked on the ranch. Both of them were rated as active members of the study of Chairman Mao's works. I am in this Growing up in a wonderful family, like a young tree thriving in broad daylight on a green meadow, knowing nothing but joy and happiness. I heard my father's suffering from my blind grandmother Family history: Why did my father work as a long-term laborer for Ma Bufang’s family, a Qinghai navy leader, and he worked hard, but he still didn’t have enough food and clothing? My uncle was dragged to death by a horse, and my second uncle starved to death. When the old grandmother talked about this, she always exchanged tears I think, when old people are together, they always talk about the tragic past, and then thank Chairman Mao and the Communist Party with a smile on their faces, for giving them a happy life. I think:

The matter is over, the rain is over and the sky is clear, why do you always mention it? "When I was eleven years old, my mother took me to the movies, and the movie that day was "The White-haired Girl". When I came out of the movie theater, I only felt my mother holding my hands, cold and trembling! I looked up in surprise, I saw my mother's face covered with tears. When she came home, she closed the door gently without saying a word, hugged me, and said tremblingly: "My child, you have seen the misery of the Han girl Xi'er." A story? That’s what my mother experienced when she was a child!” She pointed to the deep scar on the back of her left hand and said, “You grew up in honey water, and your mother never told you those sad things. Today, mom can't bear it anymore!' At this time, she was crying, and I went up to her in panic and hugged her tightly, took out the handkerchief again, and wiped her tears. Mom calmed down, and slowly said to me She told her story: She had no father since she was a child. My grandma took four children and worked for the herdsman. There was no way to make a living. My grandma gave the eldest son to someone else as an adopted son, and sold the eldest daughter to a herdsman. When the slaves, my aunt, was separated when the Kuomintang warlords provoked the ethnic minorities in Xinjiang and Qinghai to kill each other.

In the end, only my grandma and mother were left, living by begging.Soon, my grandma died of illness and hunger, and my mother had to herd the sheep for the shepherd alone... On a windy and thunderous evening, my mother managed to drive hundreds of sheep back from the wilderness, and the shepherd counted them After counting, I found that one was missing. He scolded and whipped my mother. He also took out the red pokers from the firepit and hit her on the head. A large piece of flesh was pinched away by the tongs, and the blood flowed down the fingers line by line!The shepherd also forced his mother to go out and retrieve the sheep in the dark and snowy night.That night, my mother gritted her teeth and ran straight to the Kunlun Mountains full of resentment... Mom thought that she would rather freeze to death, starve to death, and be bitten to death by wild animals than return to that hell on earth.For the next three years, my mother lived a miserable life like the Han girl Xi'er in the film, running on the mountains during the day and living in caves at night... Speaking of which, my mother cried again and said:

'Xi'er is luckier than me, she can still eat the offerings from the Empress Temple, but for me, what I eat is only wild fruits and smashed animal bones, and I wear skins from dead animals! 'It was like this until the year Qinghai was liberated, my uncle who gave her away as an adopted son led the People's Liberation Army—including my father—to bring her back from the cave... At this time, my mother held her tightly He hugged me tightly and said, "My child, our happy days today are all given by the Party and Chairman Mao. You must never forget it!" '"Last year I was sent to the Art Department of the Central University for Nationalities in Beijing to study. On the eve of leaving home, my parents told me again and again, saying: 'It is our political honor to be able to study with Chairman Mao in Beijing. This is the right that the Party and Chairman Mao gave to our poor and lower-middle peasants’ children to go to school. You must listen to Chairman Mao’s words, study hard, and make progress every day!’ “I liked dancing since I was a child, and I joined the amateur literature and art propaganda team in school .When I arrived at the college, I applied for the dance major in the art department.After class, I gradually felt that the basic training of dance was very difficult for me.Among a dozen or so students in a class, I am relatively older.When practicing basic skills, the first thing to practice is to pull your legs and lower your waist. The students can support the pole and raise their legs high, but I can't lift them high; the students can bend their bodies back into a soft bow. , and me, drop by drop of sweat hit the floor, I still can't bend down!The teacher said that my strength is not enough, the specifications are not good, and I need to work more on softness.

I came out of the training ground, dragged my sore limbs, and walked back to the dormitory in difficulty, the more I thought about it, the more frustrated I became.This is exactly what people say, I am getting older, my bones are hardened, and it is no longer possible to learn dance, so I should change my major! "I just practiced the basic skills weakly and without confidence. The teacher and classmates were worried for me. My Korean teacher Jin told me repeatedly, 'You feel strenuous, the main reason is that you worry too much and your mind is not concentrated. You should cooperate with your own ideological struggle to liberate your appearance! Human bones are hard, who is born with soft bones?' My Uighur classmate Ayigul and Tibetan classmate Tsering Drolma both voluntarily Formed a mutual aid group with me to help me practice.

"Half a month ago, our whole class watched the dance drama "The White-haired Girl". During the few hours of watching the drama, I felt unprecedented emotional agitation! My mother cried to me about the past a few years ago, Lightning It reappeared in front of my eyes. The actor who played Xi'er expressed the pain and pain of the characters in the play profoundly and powerfully through her profound and graceful dance art, with her literary language of raising her head, turning around, and raising her feet. Hate, joy and happiness! I watched intently, at first my hands and feet were cold with grief and indignation, and finally my blood boiled with excitement! Coming out of the theater, I straightened my back and let out a long breath. The appeal rang in my ears: "Revolutionary literature and art should create various characters based on real life to help the masses push forward the progress of history." At this time, I felt the weight of the burden on me! Didn’t Teacher Jin say it? I should cooperate with my own ideological struggle to liberate my appearance. I must learn the art of dance well, use this powerful weapon to unite the people, educate the people, and fight class enemies with one heart and one mind , to defend the socialist red country created by the Party and Chairman Mao for us!

"When I returned to the academy, I quietly walked into the training ground and practiced the basic skills under the lights. "In the past half a month, I have made rapid progress. The teachers and classmates are very surprised and happy! You see, have my feet been lifted high enough? Is my waist low enough? But I must still Keep studying hard! "Yes, I won't practice tonight, you can leave at ease, thank you, teacher, goodbye!" (This article was originally published in Issue 6 of Tianjin Literature and Art in 1977.)