Chapter 81 past events (1)

——The few pages of pictures in the history of life are only vaguely remembered by others, but for those with weak hearts, they have been repeatedly and deeply engraved on the heart of memories!Simply rely on the deep impression and move it on the white paper-do not search on the heart board when recalling it again!Cut off the tree of my short life one by one, and piled it up on the grass of childhood like discs.I want to pick them up one by one and watch them; with tears in my eyes, with a smile on my face, and with a short song in my mouth. It's hard for him to decorate every section, it's so plump and beautiful!

I have a friend who used to say, "The next life, the next life!"—but I said this: "If life is boring, I am afraid of the next life. If life is interesting, this life is enough!" The first thick disc is the sea; to the west of the sea and to the east of the mountain, my tree of life sprouts and grows there, absorbing the mountain wind and sea waves.Every blade of grass, every grain of sand is my first love, the angel who supported me at first. There are countless happy pictures, playful pictures, lonely pictures, and general nothingness pictures overlapping in this circle.

Let it go, it's unbearable to remember! The second thick circle is the shade of greenery; many of the delicate flowers of life in this slice are set off by the shade of greenery.There are thick red ones, pale white ones, and indescribable ones... the green shade of the evening sun, the green shade of the morning mist, the green shade pointing under the stars, and the green shade under the swing of the flower shed on a moonlit night! Thanks for this Quping Mountain!It has surrounded many of my thoughts. The third thick disc is not the sea, not the green shade, what is it?I have no idea!

If life is tasteless, I don't want an afterlife.If life is interesting, this life is enough. 2 Darkness is not haze, I hate haze, but I love darkness. In the light, everything is apparent.Black is black and white, and there are trees, flowers, red walls, and blue tiles; then everything is completely new, and there are people, me, and the world. Ode to darkness!Sing the darkness!Only darkness can annihilate and reconcile all these things in the void and chaos; without people, without me, and without the world! In the dark garden, I sit with Hua.I can't see her, let alone me, we just talk deeply.When it comes to concentricity, I don’t know whether it’s me or she who said it. It’s like heavenly joy to my ears—only when a gust of wind blows and the Sophora japonica flowers fall like rain, because of the feeling on my clothes and the boundaries of my feelings, Only then do I feel that "I" is not "she", and only then do I feel that "I" still exists in the darkness.

Hua handed a jasmine flower in the dark, and said: "Put it on, and with the fragrance of the flower, even if you stand up and wander, I will know where you are."——I took it wordlessly. Huamei, you are a child after all.Sophora jasmine, jasmine, are the most famous things in the dark, in a world where there is no one, you must reject this!Three "Just wait, wait, mother hasn't come back yet!" The nurse opened her tired and drooping eyes under the lamp, and said: "Brother Ying! Don't ask me all the time, go upstairs by yourself and look around the corner. When two red lights appear in the mountain gate, mother is coming soon." .”

I undoubtedly opened the door and went out, and went upstairs in the dark-watching, watching, but there was no news. Going around the other side, facing the dark sea and the shining lighthouse. A childish heart, like an adult, is bright and clear for a moment—I thought about it, and I counted the number of times the lights went on and off until I reached the eighteenth time.Facing the fate I had never imagined, I doubted what I assumed. "Life! Floating like a lamp, floating in the sea."——I took a long, ignorant breath. The lamp of life is burning, and the light of love is burning from the two red lights beside the mountain gate!Si forgot that there was snow in the hall, and did not know that there was a moon.

He walked out in a hurry, turned off the lamp, and it turned out that the moonlight was like water! Only deep snow, slight moon!The swept paths are clearly visible underground.I walked step by step, and when I reached the wall, I still felt that there were dead leaves rustling in the snow under my feet.The black shadow of the wall covers me, and I look up at the moon in the shadow. The Forbidden City in the snow, the moon in the clouds, the animal head on the roof tiles—I went home, and in the car, I felt that these familiar things entered my eyes and hearts so clearly and vividly for the first time. .

The four corners of the five halls were dark, and only neat chairs were lined up in the gloomy shadow. I sat on the side near the door at the end, stroking the brocade clothes, embroidered ribbons and crown tassels and contemplating—the mood was very complicated. The sunset is on the horizon outside the window, a moment of deep red, a moment of deep purple, and the light returns to the roof-the sound of the piano on the stage.In the shadow of a circle of lights, from the small door on the side of the stage, a dozen angels in white clothes with colorful decorations and loose hair came out, followed slowly, and silently practiced the dance in the first scene on the stage.

I stared at it intently, very chic and gentle, the upper and lower sleeves of light gauze, and the sound of the zither, in sync with the beating of my heartstrings, how touching! The lights went out, and they all went down again, and I was the only one on and off the stage. I was originally asked to come out to evacuate and rest, but where can I rest?I thought... After a while, the scene was filled with lights, human voices and laughter. How did I know that the thinking room before the play was only for me? At the beginning of the universe, there was only one Creator, and everything was lined up neatly.He leaned on Gaolan, looked at the messengers of light, sang—danced.

In the universe, human beings have all come, whether it is tragedy or comedy, there are a few plays that pretend to be sad and funny.The show is over, the people are gone, the lights are off,... It was dark for a while, and there was only endless loneliness! I'm going to be on the stage in a while, and I have to say a lot; naive words, passionate words, love words... Is it what I want to say?But since I came to the stage like this, I have to say this.I went through untold hardships, ventured into the gloomy night palace, and passed through the bright heaven, but I still had a big dream in the play.

It is confirmed that it is true—more true—on the road of life, or it is just a long time difference; but in the infinite life, how is the decades of real life different from a moment on the stage? My thoughts were heavy, I was enlightened and melancholy, and the scene became even darker. The door at the side of the stage opened, and a light shone through—I must go down, too, God!This is also "born for a great event"! I walked the road of life on the stage for several hours...and stood wearily leaning on the piano behind the stage-the voices outside the stage gradually faded away, and people have all come; whether it is tragedy or comedy, My work is over; from the beginning of the universe to the end of the universe, the same is true, the way of life has come to an end! Watch them wash off the lead, take off the decorations, silently busy. Clothes were messed up all over the floor, with golden daggers and beaded crowns interspersed.The enemies on the stage are now also holding hands and talking; the dear ones on the stage are busy with their own affairs here and there. I just watched——they are the weak in the end!I love these hours of dreamlike life! I stroked my hair, stroked my brocade clothes,... "Is life so illusory?" Liuhan was playing the flute on the corridor, and I also walked out. There was only a faint moonlight in the sky, I lifted the white gauze curtain that was blowing, and sat by the bed on the porch. My hand touched a wriggling thing, and when I looked closely, it was a very long centipede. I quickly brushed it to the ground with a handkerchief, and called Han to trample it to death. Han let go of the flute and just watched silently. I said again: "You still haven't trampled it to death!" He looked up, serious but gentle gaze, which made me flinch.He said slowly, "Sister, this is also a life!" In an instant, I felt infinite shame and sadness. Seven’s father’s friend gave us two pots of lotus flowers, one red and one white, and they were placed in the yard. For eight years, I haven't looked at lotus flowers in the yard—but there are many in the garden of my hometown; On a moonlit night nine years ago, my grandfather and I were enjoying the shade in the garden.My grandfather smiled and said to me, "When we first bloomed Santillis in our garden, three of you sisters happened to be added to our big family. Everyone was happy and said that it was Huarui." I heard the complicated sound of rain in the middle of the night, and it was a cloudy day when I woke up early. I felt a little bored.When I looked out from the window, the white lotus had already withered, and its white petals were floating on the water like a boat.There is only a small lotus pod left on the stalk, and a few light yellow flower whiskers. The red lotus, which was still blooming last night, is in full bloom this morning, standing gracefully among the green leaves. Still uncomfortable! ——After lingering for a while, there was thunder outside the window, and then the heavy rain came, and it became heavier and heavier.The red lotus was slanted left and right by the dense raindrops.Under the unshaded sky, I dare not go down the steps, and I can't think about it. Calling to my mother in the room, I hurried over and sat next to my mother——turning around, I suddenly saw a big lotus leaf next to the red lotus, slowly leaning over, covering the red lotus... I was uneasy My mind is gone! The rain didn't abate, but the red lotus didn't shake.The raindrops kept falling, and only a few water droplets could gather on the brave and compassionate lotus leaves. I was deeply moved in my heart - mother!You are lotus leaf, I am red lotus.The raindrops in my heart are coming, except you, who is my shade under the unobstructed sky? July 21, 1922. Yayuan was the sea when I was a child, but it was different when I came again. Slowly walk down the sloping dirt road—after several days of heavy rain, the stream has already reached the bottom of the bridge deck.Going down, the sand is very soft, pick a stone and sit down, reach out and gently pat the sea water... childhood friend, I meet you again! Nothing has changed: the lighthouse is still standing far away, the sea waves are still advancing and retreating, and the peanut garden on the slope is still being cultivated. ——It’s just that I changed it, with a book on my lap, a pen in my hand, and thinking about the surrounding environment that was never a problem before. I actually lowered my head and wrote a few words, then stopped, looked at the sea, sat too close, and when I was concentrating, it seemed that the waves were going to float me up. Time is a strange thing!Once you come here, your mood has changed. How about the next time?Perhaps Hai used this to reject me, a person who has lost his childlike innocence, and would not let me come again. It's getting late.Picked some wild flowers, some yellow and some purple, stuck them in the book, and walked uphill boringly——Hua Hejie and the others picked up many beautiful shells and pebbles from the sandy beach far away, and collected them in the In the basket, I just stood by the bridge and waited... They were the same as me that day. When they came again, would they have the same feelings as I do today?When the nine suddenly woke up in the middle of the night, in a semi-conscious state, I believe that the mood is the same as that of a newborn baby. ——everything, every thing, is gradually, clearly, invading into the bright consciousness. One winter night, I only felt that my soul was gradually waking up from the darkness. On the snow-white wall, where is the color of pink clouds, and the brilliance keeps beating—is it a moonlit night?clearer than it.Is it Chaoyang?more stable than it is.When I leaned over to look, it was a blazing fire outside the thin curtain.Who made it so prosperous before going to sleep! At this time, I suddenly realized that it was the middle of the night.I went to another world, which was so clear and clear that I couldn’t describe it; Blushing in the twilight, she seemed to say to me with a slight smile, "Sleeping man! I've been watching you for a long time." But Narcissus was out of the light and shadow, enjoying her fairy charm of Lingbo and microsteps, and seemed to be with Yiyi The plum blossom next to her is in dialogue. Watch my angel!In my deep sleep of ignorance, I failed you all! The fire is still rippling, and I am still still——the boundary of my consciousness is not limited to peonies or plum blossoms, but it gradually expands.But at that time, the mind was as clear as water, and everything was immersed in the water like a crystal clear stone, and it was countless. After a while, I gradually sank back into the unconscious world—I thank the God of Sleep, who used the curtain of dreams to separate the foggy night from the chaotic day, so that I could leave a completely clean world. memory!10 At dinner time.Under the light, my mother looked at me for a long time, and suddenly remembered and said with a smile: "When I lived by the sea, I was very bored. I took a nap in the afternoon, and when I woke up, I couldn't find you everywhere." I knew what my mother was going to say - I just didn't speak, I remembered things from when I was five years old. The younger brothers all asked, "What about the future?" My mother looked at me with a smile and said: "When I found the gate, she was sitting on the stone steps in a daze, facing the sea! I fell asleep at three o'clock, and she also sat at three o'clock. Poor loneliness My little one! You can see how silent she was when she was young—I hurried forward and held her in my arms..." Mother's eyes were filled with tears of joy and compassion. Father smiled too. ——The younger brothers looked at me with a smile. Mother's love, the sadness of loneliness, and the depth of the sea: they are all in my heart, and there is an unspeakable melancholy again!One by one, I forgot which spring morning it was—holding a few roses in my hand, standing on the porch—Ma Lilies were blooming everywhere, and the roses trembled among the green leaves like stars. The two of them were walking slowly in the yard, talking slightly while looking at each other. All of this has nothing to do with me—the morning sun shines on them, and the gentle wind blows on them; their friendship is brewing under the rising sun, and their dresses are fluttering neatly in the gentle wind. Spring has soaked it all -- soaked the flowers and the grass... Oh God!The independent man does not know that he too is in the spring. One or two is extremely boring, even if you travel, you can relax. ——I traveled with them for half a day. Came back - only general all the way. In the vibrating car, I just climbed back and watched through the small round window.The curved road, following the car, gets longer and longer.Trees, cottages, and field ridges all move back, only the sunset glow on the peak of the West Mountain does not move. In the car, they chatted with each other, and I also talked with Wanxia. ——"Sunset! I am not worthy to talk to you, but you can always let me look up. " When the car entered the city gate, I happened to think of the garden. They all said to go for a walk. I was bored, so I just followed them with a smile, and the car pulled out again. I quietly entered the garden, and the sky was getting dark—recalling last year at this time, when I left the garden, how was my mood at that time? In the coolness, they walked across the small bridge and steps, and they scattered again.I walked all the way with my head bowed, and suddenly raised my head to see Lie Zhong.Sitting alone under the stele, looking around green, the sunset glow is redder! Just as his thoughts were flying, Zhong came from behind.We got off the stage and walked on the narrow path.I said, "I would like to spend this long summer here, avoiding the hustle and bustle." She said, "The best times are hard to come by, and this trip is also a commemoration." I nodded silently. The birds had rested, and they kept chirping—in the twilight, they hurried out again.The car entered the city, and I was still looking back.The cool wind is blowing the sleeves and hair—the majestic and ancient city tower, floating in the sunset, has left the deepest memory! July 7, 1922. After one or three farewells, Xing came to visit me—sit under the window to write some words, look at some paintings, and only go out when the evening is cool. Just talking and talking, the setting sun outside the fence gradually faded, the shadow of the wall gradually grew, the sunset glow receded, and the stars were born; we were gradually immersed in the darkness, and we could only see the small white flowers in the nearby flower terrace, standing in the boundless sky. Blinking - shaking. Talking about her experiences and feelings along the way, she said: "It's better to have clear words under the moon. It's really boring to live in groups and chat." I said: "Sitting and talking at night is more interesting than daytime, but all kinds of nights are different. Moonlight nights are suitable for clear talks, starry nights are suitable for deep talks, rainy nights are suitable for small talks, and windy nights are suitable for strong talks...Of course, it is also suitable for people and places. , but there seems to be a natural tendency to..." That night, the tree shadows were deep, and looking back quietly, it was a starry night! Our conversation was not very deep, but it felt slightly different from the past. Every time Yisi picks up a pen, the first thing that comes to mind is the sea.I think it's too monotonous, so I often stop writing because of it. Every time I talk to my friends and talk about the scenery, the sea waves invade the shoreline of the conversation again. I think it is too monotonous, so I often remain silent and finally speechless. Once, I was enjoying the shade in the yard with my younger brothers, looking up at the Tianhe River, and talking about the sea.I want to talk about the sea thoroughly tonight, and see when the word front ends and where the association is extreme. We talked about sea tides, sea winds, sea boats... and finally we talked about the goddess of the sea. Han said, "If there is a goddess of the sea, she must be 'as beautiful as peaches and plums, as cold as ice'." I couldn't help laughing and asked, "How do you say that!" Han also smiled and said, "Look at the sea of ​​clouds and clouds, how bright it is; the sea of ​​wind and rain, how gloomy it is!" Jie listened with his arms folded, and now he used his richest imagination to point out: "She...she lives on the island of the lighthouse, the sea clouds are her fan flags, and the seabirds are her attendants; At night, she is wearing a white dress and blue dress, with a crescent comb on her hair and a star wreath hanging on her chest; she flies lightly over the waves..." Ji hurriedly asked, "What about when the wind is strong?" Jie said: "She is driving a windmill, and she is driving away on the raging waves; her long sleeves wiped out many sailboats. When it rains, she is sad Weeping, weeping, everything on the sea bowed its head and was silent. At dusk, the sun shines brightly, and it is her echoing electric smile, the clouds are fluttering, and Fengshen is gentle and unrestrained..." These words are both picturesque and poetic, which fascinates me and makes me smile. Ji was sitting next to me on a small chair, I stroked him and asked, "Your words must be better, let us hear them!" He listened quietly at first, but then he hugged me arms, and smiled, "The sea is too big, and I'm too small, so I won't say it." I was in awe——Han tapped his hand lightly with a folding fan, and said with a smile, "What a little philosopher!" Handao: "Sister, it's time for you to talk about it." I said, "I'll let you all talk about everything—I only hope that we are all like the sea!" Jie laughed and said, "We are not worthy of being goddesses, and we don't want to be 'beautiful as peaches and plums, as cold as ice'." They all laughed—I also laughed and said, "I don't want to be goddesses, I hope we can all be "sea-like" youths. Like Han said, the sea is gentle and calm. As Jie said, the sea is transcendent and majestic. Ji said it better, the sea is mysterious and tolerant, it is also open-minded, and it is also broad..." My words were too boring, Ji's head gradually hung down from my arm, I supported him, turned around and gently placed him on the bamboo couch. Han suddenly said: "Maybe I read too few books. There are really not many Chinese poems that sing about the sea. It's a pity that such an ancient country has not had a 'sea-like' poet for thousands of years!" From the point of view of the poets, their conversations have shifted to other places - I just sat silently guarding the oar, and those words just now are only in my heart, pondering over and over again - thinking. It rained at dusk on the 15th, and I went to sleep very early, and at dawn I heard the bells beating continuously. I don't know which temple the bell is from, and I can hear it when I get up earlier—especially in winter—but I have never counted how many times it was struck. Xu put on his clothes and adjusted his hair, but there was still no sound, only birds singing.Open the door and go out, standing outside, the moist morning wind blows, I feel that the spring cold is still heavy. The ground is damp, and the flowers and plants are even more fresh, shrouded in the morning mist of the sun, and the ropes of the swing are also drooping heavily under the weight of the morning dew. Suddenly, I realized that the branches were gradually greening, and the peach blossoms inside and outside the walls were all scattered after some rain. I recalled the phrase "All the peach blossoms are falling into the sky and the earth", facing the wind and being independent, I don't feel leisurely!In the three hundred and sixty-five days of 1611, there are many memorable events; in the three hundred and sixty-five nights of the year, there are many memorable dreams. In the dream, the mind is often clear, and the flight disappears, which can relieve many daytime worries.There are also many impossible and unexpected travels that can be realized suddenly. One spring night: I dreamed that I suddenly walked slowly on a long corridor, surrounded by flowers and bamboos, and outside the corridor was water.On the side of the corridor near the water, less than five steps away, there is a small table covered with a lace white cloth, a vase of white lilac flowers mixed with roses in the middle, and cups and plates scattered around it.Looking at the end of the corridor, there are hundreds of small tables, all of which are the same.It seems that there is a big gathering, waiting for the future scene of the guests. I didn't dare to stay for a long time, so I walked over gently.A green door on the side of the corridor was slowly pushed open, and the scenery changed again, and everything on the corridor was completely forgotten. Inside the door is a study room, full of rattan couches and bamboo chairs, and flower mats on the floor.There was a woman with writing near the window. I seemed to recognize her as one of the sisters I met at the summer reunion. Neither of us said anything, and I never thanked her for the trespass, as if we were engaged again.At this time, her younger sister walked in, smiled and took me out. Walking through a long corridor, there are many landscape pictures hanging on the pillars on both sides, all of which are also inlaid with bamboo frames, and the roadside is covered with lantana flowers. I went out of a round door—the focus of my consciousness in the dream, so that I could take the above scenery with me after waking up, and I would never forget it—when I got outside the door, I saw a boundless blue water. This piece of water: neither a lake nor a sea, is bluer than a lake, calmer than a sea, and too radiant to describe. ...unpaintable! The water you see when you wake up and in your dreams should be the first! A willow embankment opened up the water boundary, and the greenery stretched straight into the water.Walk slowly on the embankment.In the dream, I only feel floating, leisurely, and flustered! After walking all the way to the edge of the green hill, at the bottom of a step, I could hear someone lecturing in the hall.Suddenly, her sister was next to me again and asked me, "Are you going up?" I thanked her and said, "Don't go, it's better to go to the water." When I turned around, I was alone again, this time walking along the water's edge.The wind blows the willow leaves.Stones covered with green moss stand in a tangle of streams.The light of the water soaked my intoxicated soul... When the curtain slammed, the dream was shattered!The water light rippled in front of my eyes for a few times, and then dispersed for a while, rippling and melting! Zhang handed over a letter and hurried out again. I want to keep the dream, the dream is gone without a trace... In the haze, I picked up the letter and looked at it, but it was a postcard that Lin sent me from West Lake. In the evening, I would send her a few lines: Qingfu is all for herself, so why send me some new spring poems?The mind is already busy, and there are lakes and mountains that I have never met, and I come to dream frequently! ——"Spring Water" 15717 I was sitting in the courtyard, and Yi came in from the door and said to me quietly, "After you fell asleep, uncle rode away. It was that fine white horse..." I hurriedly He asked, "Where is it?" He said, "It's down the mountain, you went, but don't say I told you." I stood up and left.Yi smiled to herself and walked into the study. When I went out, I heard the sound of the waves. The new rain had just passed, and the sky was still lightly cloudy.The winding and flat avenue slopes straight to the bottom of the mountain. Once you run, you can't stop, and you walk down involuntarily.Turning around Gaogang, I saw my father galloping back and forth on the plain.At this time, I heard the wet nurse chasing after her, calling, "Go slowly! The road slipped and fell into the valley!" I couldn't turn my head, so I simply ignored her.I kept calling my father, and my nurse kept calling me. My father had heard it, and turned around and didn't move immediately.On the flat ground, I saw Dong himself standing far away under the tree.I smiled and walked to my father's horse. My father stared at me, hit my head slightly with a whip, and said, "Sleep well, what are you doing here?" I didn't answer, just raised my hands and laughed, "I also go up!" My father had to get down, and the horse kept spinning on the field. My father held me hard and helped me to ride.Dong came over and walked away slowly, holding the bridle.When I looked up, the nurse was standing on the post and looking at me, and then I turned around and went down. I told Dong, "Let go and let me run for a few weeks!" Dong laughed and said, "This horse is so wild, the girl can't control it, I just have to go quickly." Gradually, he walked faster, only hearing the sea breeze in his ears, feeling cold in his heart, and couldn't help laughing, with joy and terror in his smile. My father said next to me, "Okay, I'm going to feel dizzy if I walk again!" Then he walked over. I pushed back the short hair on my face, put my hands on the saddle, smiled and said to my father, "I will learn to ride a horse for another ten years, and then I can join the army. Be like my father and be a brave soldier!" Father smiled and didn't answer.Immediately watch the dusk on the sea——Dong is holding her hand in front of her, and her father is supporting her.In the evening wind, I went up the mountain until the door. My mother, He Yi, and many other people came to pick me up from the horse. 18. I am most afraid of sleeping during the day in summer. When I wake up, I will be melancholy and bored. I washed my hands and face in boredom, it was already dusk, I went to stand in the garden outside the door, and looked up to see a golden cloud. ——In the world, only Yunxia is the most difficult to describe in words. I can understand it in my heart, but I can't write it in pen.Because words are the most obvious, but Yunxia is the most illusory and the least obvious, it's useless! Turning around and entering the courtyard, Huan Han handed out a book through the window, and then went outside to read it. The clouds changed again, and the half-circle moon gradually disappeared into the clouds.I looked down at the book for a while.Hearing laughter, looking from under the round shed full of bean leaves, Jie and Wenzheng were sitting on the swing together; swinging back and forth, like a moving film——light also appeared from the circle, Pushing them behind.Guang Xia has lost a lot of weight, but her short hair brushing her forehead still can't hide her naive look. I want to be able to write anywhere, at any time, time and space are full of ethereal and beautiful flowers, for the wise people to pick up, but it is a pity that the wise people can't write! It was getting darker, and the words on the book could no longer be seen.The cloud color changed again, from golden yellow to dark gray.The gauze shirt was blown by the breeze, it was already too cold, and Yue'er didn't know where to go. July 5, 1922. After 19th, accompanied Fang upstairs to play the piano.Suddenly there was a heavy thunderstorm—those days were the period when I first left my mother to live in a dormitory.For several days in a row, the weather was fine. The students read and laughed together, forgetting home. ——But at this time, I suddenly felt depressed and anxious. I stood by the qin, lowered my head and stroked the pattern on the qin, and said, "Let's go to the front building!" Fang stopped the qin and advised me, "Wait until the rain stops before we go. Look at the heavy rain, how can we walk?" Go down; just sit aside and listen to me play the piano, okay?" I was bored and had to sit down. The thunder is only rumbling, and the rain is only surging.The sky was like ink, and it was extremely dark inside the window.I turned on the light next to the piano for Fang, and she was still playing the piano, but she only raised her head and smiled slightly at me. She doesn't pay attention to me, and I don't pay attention to her-I think my mother is at home at this time, and she doesn't know what to do?Maybe ask someone to roll up the reed curtains, move the flower pots, and the younger brothers are all clapping their hands on the porch to watch the rain... Thinking, watching Fang's piano score, suddenly felt that the paper gradually lit up.Looking back, the rain has stopped, the sun has come out again, the clouds have dispersed, and I am running very fast.The trees were greener, and the cicadas were screaming again with wet sounds. I was very happy, and went to call Fang and said, "The rain stopped, let's go down!" Fang looked at the clock on the wall and said, "There is only a quarter of an hour left, let me play it twice." I refused, and said, "If you don't go, I'll go by myself." Then he turned around and left.She had no choice but to close the cover of the piano, put the score in the small cabinet, and smiled, "You child is really annoying!" The rainwater formed a lake by the side of the court, and we walked back and forth against the wall.The remaining drops on the vines still fell from time to time. We stood side by side by the water, and saw our shadows in the clouds in the sky. Just walking up and down and talking, the depression is gone.I didn't go to the night hall that night, I just sat on the swing board, and Fang stood next to me, climbing on the swing rope, and the two of them talked until late at night.20. My spiritual friend Wan Yin mentioned in the correspondence with me that after death, she said: "I just want a white stone tomb, surrounded by low stone fences, a cross on the tomb, and a meditating one looking up to the sky." The stone statue of the tomb... The tomb should be in a quiet place in the mountains, in the shade of the trees, with a stream running slowly. If you are alive, if you have any new flowers, put one or two bunches for me, and the rest of you don't have to come. go there." After reading this paragraph, I immediately felt a quiet picture appear in front of my eyes.But I thought about it... Wan Yin, you are too "humanized"! He Ru's feet are bare, her hair is loosely tied, her body is wrapped in onyx white silk, and she is placed in an empty and clear crystal coffin, with gauze lanterns and fine music, a small boat, on a night of white moon and clear wind. , Send the coffin to the sea, tie it down gently amidst the sound of elegy, and bury it in the depths of the sea. Imagine the hanger in white clothes like snow, several large boats, connected end to end, shining with red lights, surrounded by pure music, stopping in clusters in the center of the waves.How desolate, how desolate, and how heroic! With thousands of hectares of Cangbo as a tomb field, how can it be visited by human beings?Even if you sincerely want to come to pay homage, you can only bow down to Qingbo and pay homage from afar. What's more, why use the temporary flowers in the world to entertain the eternal soul in the sea!Look at the stars in the sky and the lonely moon, the evening smoke and the morning glow on the water, and listen to the sea breeze running at night and the waves tsunami at night. So what is the magnificence of newly blooming flowers and flowing water? From then on, Mu Ran, detached, above and below the gods, fish and dragons competed, and at the bottom of the abyss surrounded by coral and jade trees, he lowered his eyes and slept forever: that is really a rare blessing that human beings have never enjoyed in tens of millions of years! At this point, I stopped writing, my mind was at ease, and I suddenly remembered that in the "Ji Gong", which is rarely written in rhyme, there is: "Young people are too sad and happy, and the news is too shocking for the father and the elders; one thing avoids the monarch and laughs, and the desire is ethereal and deep."——No Smile! July 31, 1922. Into the novel, essay collection "Superman". )