Chapter 9 heart on paper

Letters from home. The letter was written by the gluttonous fifth child, whose pencil writing was crooked.Lao Wu said in the letter: "Brother, I heard that you eat white buns all day long in the army? When will you get us out too..." He read this letter three times, and it made him sad.He is the eldest, and for four years, he hasn't sent a penny home.At first, it was a monthly allowance of six yuan, and later it grew to eight, ten, twelve yuan... He never sent a penny, and he used all the money for "progress".There is also a father and four younger brothers at home. How do they live?

Going forward, if he can't be promoted, he will have to be demobilized.The thought of demobilization made his scalp tingle!How to go back?Do you still have the face to go back? !The words of the village party secretary Liu Guodou rang in his ears again: "Put on the 'four pockets', and the girl will be yours..." He looked at the letter, and the two words on the letter were very eye-catching: "Day Lane".This is their country dialect.It is a verb, and it is a very imaginative summary, very positive.That literally means "making the sun"!Shi Ya stands on the ground and makes love to the sun in imagination.This is really a bold combination of creativity and imagination. It is the most advanced hypothesis grown on this land. It is simply a declaration of war on the "Japanese"!However, in the back of the word, it has endless meanings... Just think about it, as complicated as it needs to be, as deep as it needs to be, as deep as it needs to be, as high-spirited as it needs to be, it is both a means and an end , which can be both positive and negative, is the most practical and romantic big word in image thinking!

Looking at it, he smiled, a wry smile.He felt heavy on his back.There are five brothers, he is the boss!In any case, he had to get himself out first, and then... On Sunday, he went to see the little battalion commander.When people get to the camp, they can take care of their families.The battalion commander lives in the family courtyard of the military region, a small unit with one bedroom and one living room, and the wall is like a snow cave.As soon as he entered the door, he saw the "basket" of the battalion commander's house.The woman in the battalion commander's family was indeed surnamed Luo, named Luo Erniu, she was fat and small too.When "Bao" was pouring water for him, he sneaked a glance and thought to himself, "Bao" is not thin with black faces on his face. "Luo" was very enthusiastic, "Luo" said: "I heard from my baby's father that you are from the beam?" He said: "Yes, sister-in-law." "Luo" said: "Yeah, I am Da Luo Zhuang, it’s very close to my Hei’er..." The battalion commander gave the woman a look: "What are you talking about? Go, go!" So the woman hid in the back room.Seeing him, Battalion Commander Hu was not enthusiastic and didn't say much, just said: "Come, sit down."

At that time, he already knew that the battalion commander liked to drink two taels of small wine, so he brought a small bottle of "Baofeng" and a pack of peanuts.The peanuts were spread out on the table, and the wine was poured into two small cups. At this time, the battalion commander took the newspaper and said, "What's wrong, drink two cups?" He said, "Drink two cups." The two were depressed to drink.Here, only the battalion commander really drinks, drinking cup by cup.Feng Jiachang was licking, cup by cup, the wine sticking to his tongue, so spicy that it was only the original cup after drinking... After drinking for a while, the battalion commander raised his head and said suddenly: "I know you don't want to be demobilized." .” Feng Jiachang didn’t say anything, just smiled, very bitterly.Then he drank again, and the battalion commander said: "Drink." Five sticks at home?” He said, “That’s right.” The battalion commander said, “There’s no one basket?” Feng Jiachang said, “That’s right.” Battalion Commander Hu took another drink and said, “It’s not easy! I know It's not easy for you..." Feng Jiachang said with red eyes, "I'm really ashamed to go back..." Commander Hu said: "You idiot, don't be so pessimistic. There is a big pile of sun in Dongshan!"

Later, when he was going out, he stammered and said to the battalion commander: "Battle commander, what are you talking about..." The battalion commander smiled, and the battalion commander said, "Are you in a hurry?" Feng Jiachang said embarrassedly: "I'm not in a hurry, I'm..." The battalion commander said: "The third trick of being a soldier?" The battalion commander said: "When you have nothing, you still have one thing to hand. You just hand it over." Feng Jiachang asked in surprise: "What?" The battalion commander said: "Heart. You hand over your heart."

Feng Jiachang stared blankly at the battalion commander, unable to regain his strength for a long time, he stammered, "This...wh, how do you deal with it?" The battalion commander smiled but did not answer.When it was time to break up, the battalion commander patted him and said, "Remember, you have to be heart-to-heart." Heart-to-heart, of course he would.He was so willing.Who do you give your heart to?Organization of course.A farm boy, who do you rely on if you don't rely on the organization?He knows it.However, if it is specific, it is not so simple.Should I hand in piece by piece, or page by page, and how?This again is very thought-provoking.

He thought a lot that night, and he told himself over and over again, to talk to each other, to talk to each other... Later, in a dream, he saw himself walking towards the stage with a heart in his hands.The heart is red and fresh, bouncing and bouncing, like a big red peach just plucked!Suddenly, the heart cracked open, and it turned into a watermelon with teeth and teeth, a watermelon with red watermelon, tender and sandy... At this time, he actually thought of flies.He thought to himself, what if there are flies?You have to find a gauze cover to cover your "heart".So he went around looking for gauze covers... In his dream, he thought, the heart cannot be spoiled, and once the heart is spoiled, no one will want it.

At that time, the border was very turbulent, and there was always something... so the news of "war preparations" became more and more urgent.At one point, there was news that the superiors were going to select a group of outstanding soldiers to go to the front.The company asked the soldiers to write letters of determination.This was obviously an opportunity for heart-to-heart talk, and Feng Jiachang naturally would not let it go, so he wrote a blood letter.The blood book was written by him biting his middle finger and dipping it in blood. It said that the blood was clotted, so he bit it again, and bit it again!It was nothing more than putting some heart-breaking words on a piece of orangutan paper... At that time, he was really willing to go to the front line and serve the country vigorously, and he had no private thoughts in it.But after the blood book was handed in, there was no reply.

Of course he knows that the "heart" can also be "talked".Talking can also help.However, he doesn't know how to talk about it?It's too eye-catching to openly "talk" to company commanders and instructors.People will tell you what's on your mind.In private, he didn't know who to find?For a while, after dinner, he always walked around the entrance of the company with his uneasy "heart"... He was bumped into by the company's correspondent several times, and the correspondent asked, Fourth squad leader, what's the matter? ?He hurriedly said, nothing, nothing, I see if there is a letter.In the end, there was no "send" in.

One day, he suddenly became enlightened.He tried to write a "thought report" to the battalion commander.At the beginning, I just wrote about changes in thinking and understanding, and occasionally copied "rhetoric words" from newspapers... Gradually, I also added some situations and opinions of the company.I wrote it like this several times, but I didn't see anything from the battalion commander. I didn't even know if the battalion commander read it. He felt a little depressed.But one day, the instructor complained and said, "Fuck, the battalion commander is amazing. He even knows the swearing words written in the toilet!" He didn't say anything, but he understood everything in his heart. The battalion commander read everything he wrote on the paper.

Since then, he has paid more attention to handing in his "heart" on paper.In the dead of night, when the pen is rustling on the paper, it is a very "creeping" walking method, just like another "surrender".At such a moment, his "heart" is not so thorough.What kind of sentences to use and how to express them are all considered in advance.The "heart" is washed first, he first cleans it in his mind, and then sieves it with words to filter out those impurities and things that can't be taken out... This is a complete "rinsing" process, It is "rinsing" in the presentation, and what is presented is naturally unique, constructive, and glamorous. His handwriting is already very good, with bones and flesh, coupled with the sincerity in writing and the earnestness in pouring out, this makes him even more loyal.Unexpectedly, when people speak on paper, they appear more cordial and close to themselves.Here, the paper becomes a spread out bed, and the words become the soul spread out on the bed. It is like a stripped soul dancing on the paper. At the beginning, it seems a little shy and coy. But if you really take it off, you will take it off. This kind of dance suddenly has the meaning of dedication.In a sense, the form suddenly becomes the content, and what one person sees has a certain degree of privacy, so the way of "delivery" has also changed from quantity to quality.Time after time, such a purely individual way of "presenting" is like a hand stretched out from the heart. Through "touching" and "testing", bit by bit, a kind of fellowship that can be tasted is blended. (or complicity)... However, what Feng Jiachang did not expect was that the process of "heart-to-heart" is actually a process that makes people meticulous and thoughtful, and it is also a kind of passivation in rinsing. mature process.How can a person who is constantly glazing and waxing his "heart" not be hard?Due to the privacy of his writing, his words became less and less, and the expression on his face became more and more rigid. In the company, people began to call him "Old Feng" voluntarily. In private, he often asks himself, are you an "awl"?If you are really an "awl", don't worry.But can he not be in a hurry?However, one day he finally discovered that this kind of written "heart-to-heart" method can be used as a cannonball when it comes to a certain time when it flies out one by one! Five months later, an order came down, and he became the clerk of the battalion department. On the day he left, Lianli held a farewell party for him.At the meeting, the company commander even called him "Old Feng".The company commander said: "Old Feng, when you are in the camp, you have to talk more for us." He stood up and solemnly saluted everyone!He said: "Company commander, don't worry, I will always be a soldier of the company." As they say, hard work pays off with a "heart"... Suddenly, his opportunity came. He only worked as a clerk in the battalion for seven months and fourteen days before he was spotted by a deputy chief of staff of the military region.On that day, Liao, the deputy chief of staff of the military region, went to the grassroots to check the combat readiness, and accompanied by the head of the regiment, he went to their first battalion.The chiefs watched the training all day long, and only after dinner did they begin to listen to the reports from the battalion.Unexpectedly, just as the battalion commander's report started, the power went out suddenly, and the meeting room was pitch black!This seemed to be an opportunity given to him by God. Within two or three seconds, with a sound of "cha", the clerk Feng Jiachang struck the first match, and then he casually took out a wax from his pocket. Then he took out the second wax head, lit it and placed it in front of the head of the regiment; the third wax head was placed on the table In the middle... After that, he calmly exited the conference room. About a minute later, two bright gas lamps were placed on the conference table! At this time, there was silence in the conference room.I saw Deputy Chief of Staff Liao raised his head, his eyes scratching his face like a blade.It was only for a moment, and then the chief of staff's eyes closed... It was not until the battalion commander finished his report that the white-haired chief of staff slowly opened his eyes.Everyone in the room was silently waiting for the instruction from Deputy Chief of Staff Liao, but Deputy Chief of Staff Liao didn't say anything, he just sat so proudly, for a moment, he suddenly pointed out: "Hey, brat, what's your name?" what name?" At this moment, everyone in the room was stunned, looking around, wondering who the chief of staff was calling. Deputy Chief of Staff Liao shouted again: "The one sitting in the back, that, that, that... brat, what's your name?" At this time, the battalion commander spoke, and the battalion commander shouted: "The document—" Feng Jiachang stood up vigorously, and replied: "Here." Then, he stepped forward, saluted Deputy Chief of Staff Liao, and said, "Report to the chief, Feng Jiachang, secretary of the First Battalion of the Independent Regiment!" Deputy Chief of Staff Liao stared at him intently for a while and said, "How old is it?" Feng Jiachang stood at attention again, and replied, "Twenty-two years old." Deputy Chief of Staff Liao asked, "How many years have you been in the army?" Feng Jiachang replied: "Four years." Deputy Chief of Staff Liao nodded, and asked again: "Have you ever read a book?" Feng Jiachang said: "Ten years." Deputy Chief of Staff Liao said, "Oh, he's still a scholar." Next, the time to decide his fate came. Deputy Chief of Staff Liao turned his head to look at the regimental commander sitting beside him, and said, "I want this man." After the meeting adjourned that night, the head of the military region was sent away.The battalion commander sat in the conference room, silently and for a long time looking at Feng Jiachang... The battalion commander sat, and Feng Jiachang just stood there.The battalion commander did not speak, and neither did he.Finally, the battalion commander stood up staggeringly, walked up to him, patted him heavily, and said, "The agency is no better than the company. I've told you everything I can say, so you can do it yourself." Feng Jiachang stood there at attention, for a moment, tears welled up in his eyes... The battalion commander glanced at him, and said meaningfully: "You worm!"