Chapter 18 03

The little cat ran out of the house suddenly. It climbed onto the tree trunk defiantly, and then climbed to a high place.There was a long silence.The little deer came over, looked up and said, "The little face is poked out; it's still smiling!" After returning from her father-in-law's house, Meizi was in a good mood.She muttered, "Do you know how much my dad likes you? He misses you, but he doesn't say..." This is obviously a lie.She deliberately said father instead of mother--mother-in-law really loves and cares about me.I would rather believe that Meizi inherited all her good qualities from her mother.

"Now the city has changed a lot, and everything is different from when you left. Your magazine is very lively now, and several companies have been established. Editor-in-Chief Liu said to Dad: It will be fine if he doesn't leave... Are young people excited? Ways. But we welcome him to come back at any time. Editor Liu really said so..." I interrupted her: "Why is she so tolerant to me? She is good to your father—she is good to all veteran cadres." Meizi immediately fell silent. We really have nothing to talk about on this subject.She began to talk about Xiaolu's sports school and sports team again—"He won a runner-up in the competition last time, and the city rewarded him with 3,000 yuan. If he is the champion, he can be awarded 10,000 yuan. It's still such a small competition..."

I said: "Everything depends on the deer. After he earns more money, I will borrow money to build a mobile well in the garden. Now the water source is insufficient..." Meizi sighed. The next morning, there was an engine sound in front of the door, and Meizi immediately said, "Editor Liu is here!" Sure enough, it was Liu Meng who came in.She frowned exaggeratedly and looked at me, and it took a while before she said: "Ah!..." Meizi went to serve tea and fruit to the guests, mumbled polite words while she was busy, and occasionally greeted me.Prunes are so interesting.

I greeted the former leader and shook hands.Her hands were softer and stronger than before.These hands in this day and age will seize whatever they want without wasting time."You don't look old," she said. "You are more like this. You live younger and younger, just like a woman in love, you look radiant..." My joke is a bit off.Meizi's eyes swept over. Liu Meng laughed hard and touched my forehead with her fingers.She used to do this a lot. "Everyone misses you, and they all say how good it is for you to come back. Here, this is after the reform of the last two issues of the magazine. Is it a surprise to you? The public is highly appraised, and a few people, of course, don't care about him... "

Never would I have guessed that this was the same general magazine I had served before.It's gone further than when I left.The cover is vulgar and shameless, and the second and third covers are pictures of immoral women except for the posters; the inner text is a record of some anecdotes, "entrepreneurs" deeds, details of marriage proposals, and introductions to Qigong.The black and white pictures take up the same space as the text. Sometimes the photos of qigong masters and women, and leaders speaking take up half a page or a whole page, and occasionally two pages... I pile them aside.

"I know you're not going to like it. I don't quite agree sometimes. But publications have to adapt to the times if they want to survive. Now that publications can make money on their own, it's completely turned the tables..." Liu Meng was quite proud, her lips were slightly drawn when she spoke. "Then why do we need to start so many companies again? It seems that this time we have to try our best to make money, not to run the publication well—just make money..." The room fell silent.Meizi looked at us blankly. Liu Meng swallowed.Then she laughed: "Of course the intellectuals don't like it, and I said so, and neither do I. But the crowd does—that's what the circulation says; the crowd likes it, so what are we?"

I felt a rush of blood go straight to my forehead. Liu Meng continued: "Think about it, what are we ourselves? What is our work for? After all, is it to provide spiritual food that the masses like to hear and see? When I think about it, that worry is gone..." I tried my best to hold back, but I still asked, "Who do you mean by the masses? Who represents them?" "It's the majority of people..." I didn't want to hear her answer at all.Instead, tell her directly: "You said that the masses like a lot of things. If you don't refuse, what they want is far more than that. Do you have the courage to satisfy them?"

Liu Meng's face changed a bit: "What else do they want?" "Anything is fine, you can think about it... I'm afraid you don't have the courage..." Liu Meng stood up, took a step closer to Meizi, and said, "Listen to what he said about us..." Meizi echoed Liu Meng's criticism of me: "Look at what you said! Look at what you said..." Liu Meng didn't say anything for a long time, obviously upset.Meizi wanted to talk about some pleasant topics, but the other party just didn't talk to her.Later, Liu Meng reluctantly stayed for a while, and then left...

Meizi was very sad: "Look, Aunt Liu came to visit you with good intentions, she cares about you, and she does it for you..." I'm very upset.I told Meizi: "Forget it, don't talk about it. You think her too well. She is not as good as you think. She still has the face to talk about the masses. She knows what the masses are? She should come to this Walk around the small alleys of the city, and see the citizens and workers who have three generations of a family squeezed into a hut! She should also go to the mountains, to the plains, and see the peasants who are so poor that they don’t even have a piece of wooden furniture Go and see the people who were robbed, the female middle school students who were killed and spoiled, the daughters of farmers... There are countless vicious accidents now, and people dare not go out after dark... These people are called the masses! They are unarmed! She What's she doing, the editor-in-chief of a publication? She's just using it to cheer up the villains and get them going! She's one of those villains!"

"Stop talking, you're too impulsive..." "Look at her publications, what good has she done for the masses? No! Among the people her publication lauded were the rogues we all know—for a few bucks.Is there anything more disgusting in the world than this? " Sweat ran down my cheeks. Mei Zi said: "She said that some people have made such comments before, and she said that the publication is operating normally and within the scope of the law..." "The law is also the law they interpret. Many people's houses don't even have a decent piece of wooden furniture. How can there be a law? Listen to her bluffing..."

"She told Dad that she will invite you to work as a manager in the best company in the future, and the salary will be high..." I interrupted her: "I'm not going to earn her dirty money. My vineyard isn't making much money right now, but it's clean." Meizi shed tears: "Editor Liu cares about you because of his father, what should he say when he finds out?..." ... Meizi has been wiping her tears for a long time.She said that Liu Meng would never forgive us again, and she would not even go to her father again—"You can think that way in your heart, how can you contradict face to face? You are too uncultivated, I am really worried about you..." Seeing Meizi's sad look made me feel a little bit relented.I told her that it was really unbearable at that time—I thought a lot at that moment, thinking about the people in the mountains and plains, the recent injuries to the forehead, and those who died... I said a little bit, and she immediately fell silent up. "Don't worry, we don't need her to forgive us. On the contrary, we have to have a boundary with her forever. Everything she did is very ugly when you look at it... You say I am too poorly cultivated, I admit it, but I am worried now What's more, there are more and more people who are too well-bred, but fewer and fewer people who dare to tell the truth. I'd better not have this kind of cultivation..." We've been talking about nightfall and getting excited.Meizi didn't think I was all wrong, but the way I was treated was still hard to accept.She muttered: "I'm so worried—I'm worried about this life...how are we going to live? No one is like you, I know..." "No, there are many, many, many people like me; Ten times braver, many, many. You don't have to worry. I understand what you are worried about... I've told you about the past—there's too much in our family.As I said, our family has many mistakes and shortcomings; but their misfortunes are all caused by insisting on being a good person and for their own beliefs.I often tell myself: You are just a latecomer in this family, it depends on whether you can keep it.After tossing to your generation, you can no longer be another kind of person.So many people in our family have suffered, and they have suffered enough for that burning thing in their hearts. As a latecomer, I must not slip away, I have to hold on.I actually had to pick it up as soon as I was born.This is what I figured out bit by bit, and it became more and more clear.Meizi, for the sake of our family, please forgive me for hurting you and causing you unhappiness; please believe that our blood and tears are all for the poor and to be a good person—a person with faith He is a real good man!Please believe that our family is selfless, we believe that there should be justice-it should exist... If I relax a little today and become a different person, then for our family, It's all for naught.I absolutely dare not and must not take such a risk, this is too terrible, this kind of betrayal is too great... I just thought about it back and forth, I really can't back down..." Meizi didn't say a word in my hurried tone.She can fully understand my mood at the moment.She hugged me and kissed me hard.Her tears wet my face. How I need her, we cannot be separated. How long has it been since we had such an in-depth conversation.Her character determines her accommodating, lack of courage, and lack of determination.But she was kind, clear, able to discern and judge.As long as she calms down, she seldom gets right and wrong.It's not easy, and in a moment of seduction and confusion like this, it's very rare for her to be able to do this. I want to see her dark eyes in the night.I saw.I said: "You are still the same as ten years ago..." ... In the end, it was my father-in-law who disappointed me.He asked Xiaolu to call me, in a hurry. I know Liu Meng has already reported to him in detail.Any arguments about Liu Meng don't mean much, but for Meizi, I went anyway. My father-in-law actually asked me: "You said that their magazine makes money from prostitution—is that true?" "No." "This comrade never lies!" I laughed: "Her specialty is lying. We've worked together for so long and know her." "She likes to dress up, and she's a little squeamish, I know that; but she won't lie." "It turns out she will. You ask Meizi, she was there the whole time." He turned to his daughter.Meizi immediately took my side: "No, he never said that at all!" Father-in-law let out a long breath.After a pause, he continued: "No matter what, you must be tolerant to others and be good at uniting people who disagree with you... She has always been very kind to us. Did you not consider the consequences when you spoke to her like this? Did you take care of the overall situation? ?" "You have a friendship. You are still you." The father-in-law was a little uncomfortable, moving about: "It's impossible not to be affected. She will think... last time she brought your mother a pack of ginseng candies. Comrades..." I couldn't help but interject: "She shouldn't have made the publication dirty, she's gone too far!" The mother-in-law has been listening, and then she said: "Liu Meng is so crazy! Her old Yu is really relieved..." "Old Yu" is Liu Meng's man.Meizi and I both laughed. The father-in-law glanced at his wife: "What nonsense!" ...Finally he insisted that I go and see Liu Meng—"It's not necessarily to admit mistakes, but to express apology; people are angry, and their words will inevitably go out of line." The mother-in-law also agreed with the man's words and urged me: "Go, let's go; you don't know, Liu Meng cried when she found your father. It's not easy for her. She can't face it..." When I came back, I asked Meizi, "Shall I go?" Meizi said, "Go, I'll be with you." I know in my heart: I won't go... This is a scorched city that makes people unable to have a moment of peace.Our little nest was originally very remote, but now it has been surrounded by noise and noise all night long. There were two or three karaoke halls, a coffee shop, two clothing stores and a dance hall beside the sidewalk less than 30 meters away from us.They are all equipped with high-power speakers, and they are still singing loudly at two o'clock in the middle of the night.The sharp, howling, weeping, out-of-tune... all kinds of singing and clamor make people completely desperate.No matter how the windows and doors are closed, all kinds of sounds still squeeze in. I asked Meizi: "Has it been like this for a long time?" She said yes, "Someone came forward to find the relevant department before, but it turned out to be useless, so I had to endure it." Meizi also often takes sleeping pills.She is used to this kind of life, saying that everyone takes sleeping pills, and I heard that there are no side effects. I had to up my dose of sleeping pills or I wouldn't be able to sleep well.Not only these audio equipment, but also the tweeters of various vehicles, the running and chasing and fighting in the middle of the night-almost every night there is a group of fighting people, surrounded by hundreds of people to watch.There was one fight that lasted more than four hours and left pools of blood on the sidewalk: there was a bunch of guys in nail jackets scurrying around that day, all of them on big motorcycles.Afterwards, someone said: The two groups started working in the tavern, and they both had backgrounds; in the end, each of them used a wireless phone to call for help... What kind of residential area is here. It's deteriorating at an unprecedented rate.In the middle of the night, lying on a narrow bed, listening to the intertwined noise, it is like being in a raging sea. The small bed is like a thin boat, which will be smashed to pieces in an instant... I just swallowed a large dose of sleeping pills at night , asked Meizi: "Is it just like this?" She blinked, "It will be better if you get used to it. Don't think about it, the more you think about it, the more annoying it gets. Don't think about it, it will calm down a little bit like this. Try it." Goodness, the condition is "don't think about it"! Don't think it's impossible, because all kinds of sounds are actively sent to the eardrum.There is no avoiding... Finally survived a night.In the middle of the morning, some acquaintances came to play, and we learned from the chat that most of our former friends—most of whom graduated together, had already suffered from incurable diseases... This news kept me silent for a long time.I dare not recall their voices and smiles.It was very frustrating.I find it strange that there are still so many cheerful and high-spirited people - they are either stupid and bold without worry, or they are simply special characters - such as Liu Meng and others, who have moved for the first time, They have already moved from the noisy and smoky downtown to the outskirts of the mountains...the night there is full of chirping of bugs. Before leaving, the visitor also told a message: ○The people of the third institute are stepping up preparations for the "Thirty Years of Academic Activities Celebration Symposium"...Damn it, a charlatan with hands stained with the blood of scholars , now it's time to celebrate my "Thirty Years of Academic Activities", and many famous people will come to the meeting in person to congratulate.Congratulatory messages and telegrams are being collected right now... What the hell.Relevant departments have allocated special funds for this seminar and celebration, and together with corporate sponsorship, it is expected to collect 500,000 yuan; if you can't run out, keep it, continue to do a little bit, and strive to establish an "academic school" named after "Porcelain Eyes". The Foundation"...hell.I have never heard of any "seminars" held in this city for some really outstanding scholars, such as my mentor, and the academic leader who died in the kiln... I said to Plum, "I must go back to the vineyard as soon as possible. Really, I must go at once." She looks at me. I owe her so much.I took her hand and whispered in her ear: "Marry me, Pingyuan—will you?" I set off the next day. ...I really can't express how I feel at this moment.It seems that only I, who is shrouded in the "sense of returning", can be so grateful... I am really glad that I have such a place of birth. Looking at it today, it would be nice to see my mother and grandmother walk away from that small seaside town.If they had stayed there and waited for their father to return, we would probably still be lingering in the bustling streets and alleys.It was obviously a premonition that helped them back then.They quickly understood that the family had to go; our family was losers in a victorious city.So they hired a carriage and went to the wasteland to look for the old man. Grandpa - the founder of the wasteland!When I recall our family and look forward to all our happiness and misfortune, I always remember you first... I deeply understand that as long as I remember your gaze and your smile, no one will be alone. Go astray. I may have walked to this vineyard under your guidance just like my mother and grandmother back then.I even imagined that you were sent by the gods to the world to guide our family... During the years I spent on the plain, I had occasion to frequent the little seaside town.For a long time, how many times I seemed to be attracted by a magnet, and I walked to its side unconsciously.I remember that when I was in that geological college, I always hurried through the southern mountains and set foot on the plain with a rucksack on my vacation.I wandered around the small town, listening to the roar of the giant ship on the pier from a distance, and then walked away without a sound... My birthplace, to be precise, is a big mansion in that small town.I have returned to that place twice, reaching out to touch the blackened brick walls and looking at the few remaining magnolia trees.Half of the compound was demolished at the time, and half was converted into warehouses and barracks; another corner was enclosed into the high wall of the museum. Looking at the fat rosette pine growing on the roof, I can't help but think of the rich nutrients contained in this ancient house.It has existed mysteriously for hundreds of years and is likely to continue to do so.After my grandfather's death, the place lost its life; when my father was arrested, the women simply couldn't support it.It is too gloomy and heavy, and it is no longer a building that an ordinary family can afford.It has precipitated and condensed too many things... The mother and grandmother decided to leave, it must be some kind of inspiration at work. In fact, long before they decided to move out, a large part of the house had been sealed off for some inexplicable reason.Living in the hut in the wilderness, my mother still misses this big house in the city occasionally.As the days became more and more difficult, my mother finally remembered its ownership and wanted to sell one or two houses—but several agencies in the small town had already occupied the house, and they never expected a woman begging for a house, Surprised. It has only been a few years, and few people here can explain the origin of this house and its relationship with a local prominent family.Terrible oblivion. Mother looked at the grassy flagstones and the tall magnolia trees on the south wall, crying and crying... When she formally proposed to dispose of her real estate, someone suddenly realized it and hurriedly reported it to the relevant parties.Soon came a dreadful rebuke: Counter-offensive!The mother was not intimidated, she was so tenacious, and pointed out that the real owner of the house was the grandfather—"He has already died; you shouldn't confiscate the legacy of the martyrs, right?!" Those brute fellows were choked.But soon they came up with a new trick, saying that after the grandfather passed away, the house would be inherited by the father; and the father's property would of course be confiscated.The mother told them: Grandmother is still alive, and the old man should inherit her husband's inheritance... In this way, they were forced to give us back two houses, the two most dilapidated ones. Mother wants to sell them to meet her urgent need.But the person who occupies the house does not allow others to buy it, and deliberately keeps the house price extremely low.We had no choice but to sell the two houses at a low price... Now there is not a single tile in this ancient house that belongs to us. We finally lost our last foothold in the small town.This may be another piece of luck for me: first become a proletarian, and then have decisive courage.In this way, I found my destined vineyard... The spotted tiger jumped around me like crazy, with its two paws tightly hugging my waist.This way it stood almost at shoulder height with my long beak reaching out to touch my face.It was trembling all over, and every hair was overflowing with excitement.I tried to pick it up, but it was really heavy.We were surrounded by excited eyes, Gu Er, the fourth brother and his wife, and the young man were all standing by.Gu forehead didn't say a word, only glanced at him with scorching eyes.The bell rang and shouted: "Ah, I'm back, I'm back, I want to kill the tiger, ah..." The fourth brother had a gun on his back and smiled with a big pipe in his mouth.He muttered: "Go back one day earlier, your friend—the brewing engineer hasn't left yet..." The bell rang out: "It's great to bring a big girl! Why don't you bring a big girl?" I asked my fourth brother about that friend, and he shook his head: "It's useless. Now that I'm back, my eyes are sharp, and I'm talking here and there. My mind is confused, and I'm useless... Alas, it's all That bitch was fucked. She delayed a good man..." I can imagine the state of that friend.It seemed that he had to go to a mental hospital this time.I hate that tall woman.It seems that she and the gang--I always think there are a lot of beautiful and shameless women in this world--are determined to drive good people to the end.That loyal friend of mine was ruined just like that.You can be beautiful and shameless, but don't destroy my friend!In the high-end hotels of the big cities, there are too many beautiful sluts, and they feed like proud mice in the thick wool carpeted corridors.But they never intended to destroy sweaty laborers; they simply had no interest in that. I couldn't be happier with that friend's miserable situation.They're all trying to make me forget about him, but how can I?The gardener came by in a fancy dress and staggered as she walked.Since she no longer had any hope of her gardening career, she had leisure and leisure.She put on eye shadow, learned to speak the local dialect, asked the fourth brother for drinks, and teased the slender young man—I found that she had a preference for him, pretending to be an old lady, laughing at the young man's black mustache, Scratching his nose...that's not a good sign.I never want the garden to be disturbed again at this time. After the female gardener left, the fourth brother immediately said: "She has been coming here for a while now. That garden is no longer good, and her heart is no longer there." The bell said: "This girl is not bad, she has big eyes; she just has too much temper. If you splash it, you can kiss a tiger a dozen times in one breath..." The fourth brother got a big catfish more than two feet long from nowhere.It's been a long time since I had such delicious food.Ringing the bell made some more wild vegetables, and the fourth brother brought the wine bottle. What a delightful dinner it was.The moon seemed to be full, and the huts and courtyards were brightly reflected; the small beetle walked on the ground, and the spotted tiger stretched out its paws to touch it from time to time; but the spotted tiger never hurt them for no reason.The morning glory poked its head over the fence, surrounded by swollen beans.Those thumb-sized birds sniffed the morning glory one by one, and flew to the other side of the fence... With a gust of northwest wind blowing, we all heard the sound of an erhu.The sound of the piano under the moonlight is heart-pounding.We listen without moving.The sound of the sea tide is not too heavy, only the confession of this piano.It was a song "The Moon Reflected in Two Springs" - a masterpiece by the blind artist A Bing many years ago.This hopeless and resolute genius moved us once again this night.His passion filled us like a tidal wave and engulfed us.We are covered with overflowing waves and foaming water splashes, and endure the omnipresent crash and wash.The whole body is scorching hot, this collision is sometimes violent and sometimes soft, this is a thorough washing.Gradually passed.The tide inevitably ebbs.It turned into a sea of ​​surging and connected water, whirling endlessly in the night.It whirls and turns... I keep my eyes closed.How grateful to the pianist in the night.He and his qin have become a godsend tonight.This is a gift from the gods to the whole plain.I appreciate him. On this returning night, I understood this piece of music for the first time - it turned out to be telling a story of determination and endurance. When the tune disappeared, there were no more remarkable sounds and things on the big beach.Everyone is silent.I opened my eyes, and then I was taken aback - the fourth brother closed his eyes tightly, tears filled every wrinkle... I held my breath and looked up at the sky full of stars. I believe that the confession of the blind man A Bing has aroused the memories of the fourth brother's life-how to leave the plain to seek a living in the northeast; how unfortunately he disabled a crutch; stray... There was a clacking sound in the vineyard, it was dew dripping.We could all feel it was one of the best nights on the plains.The spotted tiger got up and consciously went to patrol the garden.After about half an hour, it re-lyed to the place it was just now.It holds its head up, and its nose shines in the moonlight, which is wet from the dew in the garden.How wonderful it would be to have such a time forever. Can't imagine all of us losing this vineyard.When I think of the fourth brother dragging that crutched leg to wander around again, I feel a pain in my heart. ... I don't know what's going on, and sometimes I'm surprised when I think to myself: Why are there so many friends around me who have suffered bad luck?It's chilling... I haven't discussed this feeling with other people, and maybe everyone's impression is the same.If this is the case, there are too many unfortunate people.But we clearly saw so many joyful and uncontrollable people... We must go and see the winery engineer, what is going on with him now? In the past, he was a famous winemaker and produced two famous brand wines; he also had a great wife, a strong body, and a spacious house.He was only forty-two or three years old at that time, with a black red face, a high nose bridge, and curly black hair.Enviable in every way.He traveled all over Europe with his favorite wine and wore a smart suit almost all the time.Now he is forty-six years old, will soon be over fifty, and suddenly lost his wife again. She is his treasure. His hair soon turned gray, he drank too much and his fingers often trembled.He messed up those spacious rooms, locked up all the flowered clothes, and hung a colorful bamboo hat worn by his lover on the wall... His nerves began to malfunction. Then people suddenly realized that he was a very poor man, and he was an orphan! He graduated in his twenties and was assigned to work in an eastern city, and he hasn't moved yet.Later, they fell in love and got married, developed their careers, and were envied by others.He didn't expect his happiness to be so fragile.Right now he is helpless, his hometown is in a mountain city thousands of miles away, his parents have passed away long ago, and his only cousin also passed away last year... He's a real bachelor now. I went straight to his dormitory, the door was locked.Asked about it, said he was admitted to a mental hospital! "His condition developed rapidly and was out of control. We had no choice but to find someone to tie him up and drag him there by car..." The word "tie up" almost made me cry.I endured it, not wanting to look at this place again.There is a disgusting smell of alcohol everywhere. After rushing to that mental hospital, he was allowed to visit him only after he had to talk about it.It seems that the expressions of those doctors are not normal. The place was like a prison cell--with barred windows.All seriously ill patients live in such a room.He met me through the window, holding the iron bar tightly with both hands, shaking it, trying to break it in one go.He must have recognized me. He stared at me for more than ten minutes without moving, and burst into tears.The whole person is frighteningly thin, and the already big eyes appear even bigger, with a pointed expression.I managed to hold back and didn't cry.I called him, but he didn't say anything, just wept.I pressed his hand, and he pressed his forehead to it.He murmured and raised his face: "...the dog son of the big boss came to visit and saw her at a glance...then he took her to go fishing in a car, and then..." These words can't be wrong.I believe he was wide awake at this point.I told him: "Cheer up, don't be discouraged! What important things you have to do! What a shame for such a woman!You are ten thousand times more important than her!do you understand? " He shook his head: "I'm not important...she's important—you don't know her! She's important..." What more can I say?I've met that woman more than once, and I daresay she's the most insane woman in the world.She has a long face, and the eyebrows, eyes and nose bridge are more or less alien.People look very young, they have not changed a bit over the years, and they hardly age.How much she loved our winemaker back then, and kissed him as soon as she turned around while we were playing together. "She can't stand it, that's what she is!" the winemaker explained to his friend apologetically. Maybe it shouldn't be a surprise what happened at this time...but someone should teach the unscrupulous hooligans a lesson. He continued to shake the iron lattice, and shouted if he couldn't shake it off.The sound was rough and frightening, like the sound of a mountain torrent.He completely lost control and yelled.After a while, a few people came rushing over and drove me away roughly... That last scene is forever in my mind.I understand that, under strong prodding, a genius can turn into a lion... Once again I looked helplessly at a hapless friend.I don't remember how many times this is, and I don't know how many more times it will be.I don't believe that experience like this will help me—every time I have to hold back something with all my might, not to let the unrequited feelings overwhelm me. Because I was seized by such a mood, I couldn't fall asleep, so I simply sat up.I'll feel better if I tell everything.Occasionally, I look through those ancient songs under the lamp, and let my thoughts fly to thousands of years ago.But it didn't help in the end. Go out, walk to Heijiu's vineyard, let the cold wind blow... I stood under a vine, and immediately heard the sound of the tide.The strange thing is that the wind is very weak tonight, but the night tide is very loud.That deep voice indicated that the source of its turbulence was far away, near an abyss.This sound is more terrifying than the crashing of the waves on the sandy shore when the wind blows up.I have been familiar with this faint, lurking dull sound of the tide since I was a child.The old people on the plain called this kind of walrus that seems calm but can transmit the sound of the tide far away as "fahai".They puffed on their cigarettes and listened for a while, then concluded: "Tonight, the sea..." The sky is a pure dark blue.The stars are shining.The Big Dipper in the north seemed so weak.Looking at it from a distance, I couldn't help but think of Xu Fu's fleet on the Dongdu.The story of him and the great king is already fragmented on this plain.I was obsessed with all its details and used it to overcome my oblivion.And for all of this, I can only turn to the ancient songs that have been circulated among the people... It has been a long time since I wrote a line of songs, because it is pale and tasteless compared with this ancient song I collected and sorted out.I am chewing on the eternal legend, imagining the people who recite these ancient songs silently, their strange mood...