Chapter 13 13. Past events

In my childhood, on a New Year's Eve afternoon, I stood alone on the street.On the afternoon of New Year's Eve, it can't be wrong, because I always think that the New Year is coming soon.After playing for a while, I have to think about it: Chinese New Year, there will be three days when my father and mother will be at home, and they will not have to go to work; there will be three days when I will have no homework, just play; three days, my father and mother may take me out, Going to the park and visiting relatives; for three days, guests at home will come at any time, give me gifts, and give me New Year's money; in these three days, there will be fish and meat, and other delicious things... three days is long enough That's right, and it hasn't started yet, the three days will start from tomorrow.Every time I think about it, I feel unspeakable joy in my heart.So I ran away from home, and played in the streets, as if by doing so I would make surer the good days to come, and keep them stronger and more complete.I play alone in the street.It is the narrow street in front of my house.Standing in the middle of the street and looking towards both ends, there is no end to be seen at both ends-the gray sky, and the houses covered by snow under the gray sky.It started snowing in the morning and stopped around noon.But the sky is still cloudy, maybe there will be more snow, maybe it will not stop overnight, maybe when you wake up tomorrow morning, you will see that the snow is still falling on the ground, and everywhere is pure white.That would be great!I like snow, and I like the tranquility brought by the heavy snow, especially the festiveness of the New Year in that tranquility.I run alone in the street.It's not cold, not cold at all, the air is humid, fresh and clean.Occasionally, the smell of fried fish and stewed meat wafted through the air, reminding people of the current situation of every household—busy, cheerful, working together to prepare the New Year’s Eve dinner.Yes.New Year's Eve.The sound of firecrackers rang here and there, and the smell of gunpowder could be smelled, but the person who set off the firecrackers could not be seen.There are few people on the street, and they are all at home. Occasionally, one or two people who have been delayed for some reason are hurrying on their way with a basket full of New Year's goods.

In fact, there is not much fun on the street.I just jumped in the snow, knocked the snow off the trees with a wooden stick, and poked the snow on the side of the road full of holes, waiting for the time to pass, and it was approaching the New Year's Eve.I'm in no hurry to go home, anyway, a string of good days is coming.I am not in a hurry to go home at all, let the happy New Year's Eve accumulate more densely in invisible places.Don't let it come and go too fast.It's better to stay in this warm air for a while, and stay in the joy of waiting for a while.I hope that when the dusk slowly falls, my mother will come out to look for me. She walked to the street, looked around, and then yelled at me: Hey, are you still going home? Chinese New Year——!

I squatted under a telegraph pole and thought about it, when I suddenly saw a cat standing in the middle of the road.I don't know where it jumped out of. It is all white, but its ears and tail are black.It watched me from a distance for a while.So it jumped back and forth between the snowdrifts, and when it saw the red firecracker shavings scattered on the white snow, it smelled it and planed it.Just screaming "meow-meow-", seems to have an unusual feeling of happiness.I chase it.It hid behind the snowdrift.I could see him sometimes by his black ears and his black tail, and when he put his head down and his tail tucked away, you couldn't tell which snowdrift was which.I chased it between the snowdrifts.This cat seems to have some spirituality.When I walked here, it showed two black ears there, and when I ran there, it showed a black tail again, but I couldn't see how it ran from here to there.It always keeps a distance of five or six meters from me, neither far nor near.When I got tired of chasing, it poked its head out from the snowdrift, turned its two black ears to look at me, or laughed at me.Of course it doesn't laugh, the thing seems to have a sense of humor.This cat is a bit mysterious.I think I have to deal with it seriously.I was thinking how to deal with it.It suddenly disappeared.I looked here and there with my head down, but I heard its cry from a high place, when I looked up.I saw it huddled comfortably on a certain roof, with its eyes even half-closed.When I ran under the eaves, it seemed that it was no longer there. Immediately afterwards, its sweet cry sounded from another direction.I turned around quickly, and saw a white cat lying lazily grooming on a step five or six meters away.Damn, how many cats are there! I was annoyed, and rushed to the steps with a wooden stick.It looked at me calmly, motionless.Seeing that I rushed to it, I jumped away with a "bass".That's not annoying.What's annoying is that it didn't run far after jumping away, and still kept a distance of five or six meters from me, playing leisurely there, smelling the firecrackers on the ground, jumping back and forth between the snowdrifts, calling softly, Look at me.I think forget it, this thing!Just ignore it.But when I think about it this way, it seems to have changed its mind accordingly. It doesn't jump or bark, and hides quietly behind the snowdrift, only showing two black ears, as if deliberately letting me see it.I sat on the steps panting.Seeing that I stopped chasing it, or believed that I gave in and finally admitted defeat, it walked out swaggeringly, and then stood in the middle of the street and stared at me like a knife.I know that if I move, it will slip away again.Jump up a tree, jump up a wall, or hide anywhere, so I don't move, and I stare at it unambiguously.I met the white cat's eyes and looked at each other. After a while, it began to scratch its head and look at the sky, shrugged its nose, and raised its ears to listen.The sky is getting darker and darker, and the sound of firecrackers is getting denser.Probably convinced that I am a vulnerable guy.The cat barked twice in contempt, turned and walked away.It walked a few steps and looked back, and then stopped and looked back at me after a few steps, and I followed it in a strange way.I feel that I have followed it for a long time, and I have passed through many houses.Finally, it was dark, and its snow-white figure suddenly disappeared into the courtyard gate of my house.I followed it into the courtyard gate.I followed it in but the yard was empty, no house, no people, no sound, no home, only the gray sky, only the gray sky with heavy snow falling.Where is home? I yelled: "Mom—" I yelled: "Mom—! Isn't it going to be Chinese New Year?"

Woke up.is a dream.I heard my wife wake up too.She turned over and said, "You've been having nightmares lately." It was still dark.It was so dark that it was probably two or three o'clock in the middle of the night.I thought about the dream for a while, but I could recall very little of it, it should have been much more complicated.I sigh.The wife turned over again and asked, "What did you dream about?" "Heavy snow. Also, it's almost Chinese New Year." "You always dream about heavy snow." "I don't know, and I don't know what's going on." "You said you were Born in the snow." "Maybe. But in my life, many important things happened in the snow." "What else?" "And the day I got your photo for the first time..."

I heard my wife turn over and over again. "It was also snowing heavily that day, and it was almost the Chinese New Year. I was running alone on the school playground. It was many years ago, and the air at that time was much cleaner than now, and it seemed to be much deeper. I opened my mouth and breathed hard. , it will clearly go deep into you. The firecrackers at that time were not as loud as they are now, and they are not as dense as they are now. It was thicker. People at that time seemed to be more patient and waited. I ran round and round on the playground without feeling tired at all. Maybe it was because I was young, maybe it was because the Chinese New Year was coming soon. I had a kind of hope in my heart. In fact, at that time, there was hope in my heart every day. The hope of Yingming was not because of any specific things. There may be no reason at all, but I always felt that something good was about to happen. I just ran like that, feeling comfortable all over. It feels like it’s gone now. I’m just running like that, I don’t want to stop, the happiness seems to flow out from inside...

At this time I saw you coming out of the teaching building.Your clothes are fat and baggy, not as finely dressed as girls are nowadays.I guess that dress may have been left over from your sister's clothes, and it has been washed white.But I think you are really beautiful in that dress, even more beautiful than the current famous brand clothes.You get out of the teaching building, get on your bike and leave.You slid a few steps and flew onto the car, that posture was very chic. " "I don't remember." "Of course you don't remember. You rode on the bike and left. You rode very fast and didn't slow down in the snow. I saw your blue scarf getting smaller and smaller, like a wisp of blue watercolor Watching it melt in the water."

"When was that?" "When I was in school, on a certain New Year's Eve afternoon." "I don't remember at all." "You can't remember. I wanted to say hello to you, but I happened to run to the other side of the playground, the side farthest from the teaching building. By the time I got here, you would have gone far away." "Did you pay attention to me then?" "Then I also left the playground and followed your ruts. No, I didn't understand what was going on at that time. I just felt that the kind of hope that I always had suddenly became stronger, but I couldn't tell what I was looking forward to at the time. .It was snowing heavily, and I ran hard following your wheel marks. I thought I might be able to catch up with you. But what if I catch up with you? When I hesitated in my heart, my feet lost energy. I stood by the side of the road to rest. When I saw a small plastic clip on the snow, I picked it up and saw that it was a swimming certificate, and the picture on it was you. My heart lit up, and I thought it was a godsend opportunity—wouldn’t it be logical to catch up with you and return it to you? I Then I chased after your wheel marks again. But after running a few steps, Zhang Liu came, and he called me from behind on his bicycle, asking me if I had eaten too much and I was still running. Going home? I hurriedly put away the swimming license. I thought I would return it to you someday, but then I saw that the swimming license had expired anyway, so I kept it. Of course, I wanted to keep you photo."

"You kept it all the time?" "Keep it." "Where?" There was a bang in my mind, yes, where is that photo? Then I felt a pain in my heart - I understand that the photo has been lost.But how did you lose it? When did you lose it? How did you lose it? I woke up again.Dream.Still a dream.I stretched out my hand to touch the other side of the bed, it was empty, the place where my wife usually slept was empty, and the surface of the bed was also cold.She is no longer there.She's gone.She has been absent for several days.She said it's better to get a divorce, I really can't stand you...

It was daylight.Sure enough, it was snowing heavily outside the universe.I remembered that my wife and I agreed to go through divorce procedures today.Damn, just leave! She also said that she can't stand me, there are all kinds of jokes in this world.I swallowed my anger, I bowed my knees, I was so busy, I was as tired as a donkey and I had to apologize to her when I came back, she said go east, okay, go east!She said go west, okay, go west... In the end, what's the matter, but she can't stand me? You have to be a bit of a joke, right?Well, I'm lucky I didn't drive her crazy.let's go.

The snow was so heavy that they couldn't even see the building opposite.Once in the snow, the mood is much better.Snow has a magical power, as if it can stop all the noise, recall the past, recall childhood, and think about what we are here for. At the pre-appointed place, she was already waiting there.We glanced at each other, and without saying anything, we walked in the direction of the court.Slowly I walked in front, and I heard our footsteps were still neat, stepping on the snow, creaking, creaking... I began to feel a little sad, and my heart ached.Snow makes the world quiet and makes people remember.Snow makes people weak and allows you to see the details of things.The details are soft, gentle and clinging.Snow makes people miss home and the stove at home. The kettle on the stove is bubbling with steam, and the mist forms ice on the windows.Snow conjures up images of homeless people running around, lost in the cold and lost.

The quietness of snow makes people hear the distance, not only the distance of space, but also the soul, which never stops here.The delicacy of snow makes people ignore those rough quarrels... I stopped abruptly and turned around. I wanted to ask her: should we think again? But I saw that she had already stopped, and she was five or six meters behind me with her head up and her eyes closed, letting the snowflakes fall on the face.As I approached her slowly, I saw tears streaming down her face, making the snowflakes melt along the way. I live upstairs with her, but she doesn't move.I asked her, but she didn't move.I touched her face, it was as cold as ice.I called her, she should not.I was scared and pushed her.It's like pushing a tree.I shouted: "Dongyu! Dongyu——!" Yes, it is still a dream.I'm still at home, alone in bed.It was fully light, and the curtains were flooded with brilliant sunlight.I turned on the TV, and the news was just finished, and the weather forecast was being broadcast: Today is sunny during the day, and the highest temperature is 39 degrees... So it is summer? It is summer, and the curtains are opened, and there are green onions outside. But could this be a dream again?I pinched my leg, felt it, and pinched hard, it hurt.It seems that Dong Yu is really gone.It seems that marriage is right and wrong.It seems... mother's leave, let's leave.I got up, went to the toilet, brushed my teeth, washed my face... What did I eat? The refrigerator was broken, and the things in it were packed.Let's eat on the street. 39 degrees?I couldn't stop watching, it seemed like I was on fire just after 8:30.None of the leaves move.All windows are closed.All air conditioners are dripping. I bought a pancake.The old lady selling pancakes said: "Forget it, it's a difference of 20 cents. Anyway, you come here often, so I will give you a discount." I asked her, "What date is it today?" "No. 7." "Sure?" "Why don't you ask someone else." Ask who? Who will tell you that it is the 7th, but can this prove that it is not a dream? On the 7th, at 9:00 a.m., see you at the gate of the court, where your wife will become an ex-wife.The problem is more serious than imagined.How about yelling hard, will you wake up? There are too many people on the road, don't scare anyone anymore.Now the street is like a parade day and night, where are so many people coming from? Maybe just call him out? Whoever he is!But, even if you wake up again, can you tell you're not in another dream? The constant nightmares are driving me crazy.However, if she really woke up now and found that Dong Yu was by her side, and that the divorce was just a dream, that would be fine.It would be fine if Dong Yu called me "Hey, wake up, wake up" while pushing me at the same time. "What nightmare again?" "I dreamed that you were going to divorce me." "Are you still afraid of this?" "Dongyu, isn't it a dream now?" "No." "Sure?" "Okay, okay. Why don't you get up soon? It's getting cold early..." But I was clearly walking on the street.It's not a dream, and I can't wake up.When did I become so useless? Leave as soon as possible. Fortunately, she has her house and I have mine.As for the deposit, I said I don't want a cent, and she also said that I don't want a cent.Okay, they are all fucking gentlemen.Fortunately, there are no children. It would be lively if there were no children. I walked all the way and thought: Maybe it was not a good omen when I gave that photo to Wu Ye? It was on the "Great Series" road. Seven or eight of us went to Yan'an on foot together. When we reached the bank of the Yellow River, Wu Ye fell ill and it snowed heavily. We stayed in a small village in Yuli.At night, Zhang Liu and I took care of Wu Ye.The cave was very deep, like a small oil lamp.I flipped through the leaflets I picked up under the lamp.Zhang Liu lay on the side and slept as if dead.Wu Ye kept talking nonsense, babbling nonsense, and I kept rubbing his head, and the fever was severe.I have taken antibiotics and antipyretics, what can I do in this remote area? I just looked at him like that, Zhang Liu couldn't point it out.Now even if he was beaten up, he would still sleep standing up.There was a wind blowing outside, and there were waves of howling wolves in the wind.I looked out from the crack of the window, the snow had stopped, and the moon was shining brightly. "Dongyu, Dongyu." A voice called Dongyu. Who is it? Listen carefully, and the voice is gone again. Dong Yu lives in another cave dwelling with two other girls.At that time Dongyu was just my classmate.Years later it was my wife. "Dong Yu, hello, Dong Yu..." Who called her?The sound in the middle of the night was really annoying. "Who? Who is Dong Yu?" "I, it's me." The voice seemed to be outside. I turned and looked.Oh, it was Wu Ye, it turned out to be Wu Ye, he was talking in his sleep. I answered subconsciously: "What's the matter?" Unexpectedly, Wu Yejing went on to say, "Actually, it's... nothing wrong." I suddenly had a mischievous heart.Imitating Dong Yu's accent, he asked, "Then why did you call me?" "I think. Can we... go in series together?" "Okay, where are you going?" "Tell me. As long as I'm with...with you, I can go anywhere." "What's the meaning?" "Dong...Dong Yu, what do you think of me...how am I?" "I think you're cute." "Really? Do you really... think so?" "Of course it is." "Then...then can we be together forever?" I almost laughed out loud.I pushed Zhang Liu hard.Zhang Liu turned over and continued to sleep. "Then...then can you...can you send...a photo of you?" So I took out the photo of Dong Yu and stuffed it in Wu Ye's hands.What about Wu Ye?He actually sat up in his dream, clipped the photo into his notebook, stuffed it into his schoolbag, put his schoolbag under his pillow, and fell asleep again.This time he slept very peacefully.No more nonsense. I stared blankly at him sleeping, regretting a bit, why did I give him that hard-won photo in a daze? I thought it would be better to get that photo back while he was asleep, but at this time Zhang Liu woke up. "Is Wu Ye okay?" "Oh it's all right." "Okay, then you can sleep for a while, I will watch him." I know it's over, don't want to get that photo back.How do you want it? Why do you want it? And it's not a dream. I was walking on the street, kicking a postbox, and a telegraph pole, it was not a dream.Thinking of the phone call Zhang Liu made the day before yesterday, the evidence that it wasn't a dream was particularly convincing. "Hey, Wu Ye is back." "Wu Ye?" "There has been no news of this kid for more than ten years, but he suddenly appeared yesterday." "Really? Where has he been all these years?" "In a foreign country. This kid is fine. He is now a tenured professor. In the past we always said he was a nerd, but now he is on a level with an annual salary of 70,000 U.S. dollars!" "Okay, turn around and kill him hard." "Needless to say? Ten tons is nothing to him. Why do you think he came back?" Based on his stupidity, I already had a premonition... "This kid came back to look for Dong Yu." Zhang Liu said. My hunch is good.After that night in the cave, Wu Ye never mentioned the photo, so I guess he must have taken the dream seriously.It's not convenient for me to ask him.How to ask? "Where is the photo of Dong Yu?" are you dreamingBesides, why do you have a picture of her? "This idiot can do this. "Looking for Dongyu?" I asked, "Why are you looking for Dongyu?" "Don't be angry when I say it. Cough, it doesn't matter, anyway, you and Dong Yu are going to part. Wu Ye has never been married, do you know that?" My hunch was exactly right. "This kid is really dumb. He's still thinking about Dong Yu! He said how many girls with black eyes and blue eyes have expressed that meaning to him over the years, but it can't be done, and he can't do it. He said it's the same as Dong Yu The match is over, the whole thing is useless. I don’t know where he heard that you and Dong Yu are going to divorce, this kid immediately bought a plane ticket, packed up and ran back quickly... buddy, are you okay?" "Oh it's all right." "Hey, buddy, don't be like this. You are allowed to leave, but others are not allowed to..." "Grandson! What did I say? What the hell am I not allowed?" "Okay, let's stop here. I just wanted to prepare you a bit..." "I mean, um... Of course I hope they will succeed, but I'm afraid that Dong Yu may not..." "He said that Dong Yu had said it a long time ago and thought he was cute. He still has Dong Yu's token in his hand." "What token? It's a dream! You tell him, it's a dream. It's..." "Forget it, forget me, I shouldn't have said the last few words. But my brother advises you, Wu Ye was a gentleman back then. I heard that you fell in love with Dong Yu, and he left the country as soon as he turned around." "What does this have to do with me? It's a dream! I'm not going to lie to you, it's really a dream, when the big series..." "Okay. That's it. You take care of yourself, buddy." How I wish I could wake up now!How I wish I could be alert at this moment, wake up, what kind of big series, what kind of cave night, it's all a dream.But when you really want to wake up, you may not be able to wake up.But maybe when you are having a good time, you suddenly wake up again.You can't accept this world. The street is still sunny, still noisy, and the situation is still good.Every stall is an intelligence test station, or a gambling game. "How do you sell this suit?" "How much do you want?" "How much do you want?" "Seven hundred." "What are you talking about, buddy?" "If you really want it, we can discuss it." "Three hundred." "Three hundred." A hundred is not enough." "I can't pull it down." "Hey, you come back, how about three hundred and five?" "Three hundred. I'm busy." "Yes! Count me as a loser, who will let you wear this clothes How do you dress so well?" "Losing money? At least you can still earn half of it." "Say it!" Who knows who won. At 9 o'clock, there was no winter rain at the agreed place. At 9:30, there was still no sign of her.The sun burns to death. At 10 o'clock, I was a little worried.Is she always punctual? At 11 o'clock, I called her, but no one answered.Maybe she's on her way here. At 11:30, I figured I'd have to go see her, 20 minutes max from her house. I ran to Dong Yu's house as fast as I could.I didn't call a taxi, I was afraid that I would miss her, she is a model of economy, and she rides everywhere.I ran all the way and was out of breath.It's really not what it used to be.I ran on the school playground back then, and I didn't do this for more than a dozen laps.But back then it was to expect the dream to come true, what about now? Now it is just the opposite, I hope the reality is a dream.Damn, is this old? You can’t help but admire Wu Ye. He ran from the other side of the earth to this side. He has been running for decades! But I suddenly understood one thing: I still love Dong Rain, otherwise why should I worry about her?Why do I want to see her so desperately?I started to run a little more easily, like I was running after her tracks one New Year's Eve trying to catch up with her.I'm glad that's back, at least I'm looking forward to it.I thought: come on, I'll give in again, make amends to Dongyu, listen to her scolding, like what is often said in movies-give me another chance.I thought: as long as you can bear it, you can bear it again, and I will never make you unbearable again in the future.Tell me, what can't you stand? I won't do anything if you can't stand it? I think I should be able to do it... Now the question is Wu Ye, what should Wu Ye do?Or, what should I do with Wu Ye? That idiot! Dong Yu's house arrived, and many people gathered in front of the building.I heard that the elevator had an accident, and a person fell from the first floor to the second basement.I heard that the ambulance from the emergency center had just left and the man was in critical condition. "Male or female?" "male." "affim?" "Dude, both men and women are human!" "Right. That's not what I meant." What do you mean? It's fine if it's not a woman, it's fine if it's not Dong Yu, although they are all human.I ran to the thirteenth floor.Dong Yu's house number is 1301. I met Zhang Liu on the stairs. "Why are you here?" I asked. "problem occurs." "Oh, I know. Is Dongyu at home?" "Already went to the hospital." "Go to the hospital? Isn't it a man?" "Wu Ye, it's Wu Ye." "Wu Ye? What's going on?" "Wu Ye came to look for Dong Yu, stepped into the elevator, and fell straight down." "how come?" "The elevator didn't come down, but the door opened and it was empty." My mind went blank.Zhang Liu stayed with me on the stairs for a while. "Where's Dong Yu, staying with him in the hospital?" "Yes, with him, in the morgue of the hospital." "You fucking nonsense—!" "Calm down, you calm down." "This is a dream! This is a dream, isn't it?" "It was me who directly killed him. I gave him Dongyu's address. He has been waiting for Dongyu for almost thirty years. Do you know when Dongyu gave him that photo? On the road of the big series. You Do the math." "I know, by the Yellow River, that night when it snowed heavily." "How do you know, Wu Ye said he didn't tell anyone." "I'll tell you later." "He waited for decades, walked tens of thousands of miles, and finally came here after a lot of twists and turns. Finally, he came to a place that was only one step away from Dongyu. It was only one step away, but this step was like this... I heard that There's never been a problem with the elevator. Come on, I have to go to the hospital too. How about you?" On the way to the hospital, I asked Zhang Liu: "If a person has a dream and never wakes up until he dies, can this dream still be considered a dream?" "What's the meaning?"