Chapter 96 3
In the morning, a beam of sunlight shone on Xiaoyue's face through the unblocked curtains. She woke up and found a naked arm wrapped around her body.
She got up slightly, looked sideways, and saw that her mother was still sleeping beside her at some point.
She remained motionless, staring into her mother's face.
Zhang Meng seemed to be sleeping soundly.On her side of the bed, there were three folding chairs.In fact, she just slept on the bed with her upper body and her lower body on a chair.
Xiaoyue gently removed her mother's arm from her body and got out of bed. She saw a glass of fruit juice on the bedside table, covered with another kind of porcelain cup, and drank it all in one go.
She couldn't find her shirt. Later, she finally found it behind the door, but it had been soaked in the basin. After turning around, she found a new shirt stacked next to her pillow.
She picked up the shirt, but didn't put it on right away, facing the window, with her back to her mother, sitting on the edge of the bed in a daze.
She thought: Did I throw up yesterday? ... must have vomited.
She turned around slowly, stared at her mother again, and said to herself: "This is mother, this is mother... mine... she feels sorry for me... she wants me... she still loves me... from now on, I have a biological mother... I blame the young one... and the beautiful one..."
She couldn't help but bent down, not only continued to stare at her mother's face, but also slowly stretched out her hand, stroking her mother's hair.
Tears flowed from Zhang Meng's eyes.
Xiao Yue stretched out her hand to wipe the tears on Zhang Meng's face, Zhang Meng opened her eyes, and the mother and daughter looked at each other; Xiao Yue looked very unnatural, and wanted to lean away from her mother, Zhang Meng grabbed her arm, and Xiao Yue Yue opened her mouth a few times, and burst out a word: "Mom..."
Zhang Meng hugged her daughter so tightly.
Xiaoyue cried and slapped her mother's shoulders lightly with her fist: "Mom, I hate you! I miss you so much!"
On the balcony, flakes of snow fluttered all over the sky. Indoors, the mother and daughter are talking. Zhang Meng said: "Your grandpa fell ill just after he was liberated from the overthrown cadres. Although I was an only child, I had already been sent to the countryside at that time, so it was difficult to return to the city..." Xiao Yue asked, "Grandpa doesn't care about you?" "Of course I want to take care of it. But he dare not. Your grandfather, who obeyed his superiors, was timid and fearful all his life. Because of this, he rose to the top of the ranks and had a successful official career. He went from secretary to section chief to division chief to district party secretary. If he loses his official position, he will feel that life is meaningless. He was flattered to be just liberated. In order to show his revolutionary nature, he has repeatedly declared in public that he will be obliged to educate his daughter, Rooted in the frontier for a lifetime, born as a frontier man, and died as a border ghost. But in the letter he wrote to me, he talked about something else..." "What are you talking about?" "He said that his only regret was that I had gone to the countryside. He said that I had taken a wrong step in this matter. He said that if I could bear it better and didn't take this step, I would lose my life in the city. Li insisted that after he was liberated, it would be logical to stay in the city. He encouraged me to study high school courses by myself, saying that China still needed college students, and that this was the only way for me to save myself. I listened to his words, and every night, I called I secretly studied by myself under the covers with a flashlight, but I was criticized by name. I was criticized for being in the borderlands, but my heart was in the city... The first batch of worker, peasant and soldier students only looked at political performance, and the results of cultural examinations were just references. I didn’t even touch the edge. Up. More than 130 educated youths voted by secret ballot, and I only got one vote... I had the courage to cast my own vote..." Xiaoyue looked at her mother sympathetically. Zhang Meng went on to say: "My hope of returning to the city through legitimate competition was completely shattered. At that time, your grandma had been diagnosed with cancer, and the days to come were numbered. I missed her during the day and at night, just like you once thought about her." me too……" Xiaoyue choked up again: "Mom, stop talking, I don't hate you anymore..." Zhang Meng shook her head and said: "No, I want to tell you. I have never told this to anyone. Now, I can finally tell my own daughter. If I tell you, my mother will also get a share." Liberation!" Xiao Yue nestled her head against her mother's chest. Zhang Meng caressed her hair, and continued: "Among the educated youths in the regiment, there is a young man who is a descendant of a senior general of the Northeast Army. Although it was during the 'Cultural Revolution' period, the United Front still needs to be talked about. So let him be lenient. He was allowed to return to the city in a curve, first from an educated youth in the Corps to an educated youth who jumped in the queue, and then moved his household registration from the suburban countryside to the city. In today's terms, it is the second time in place. He usually has a good impression of me, so one day I secretly Invite him to a remote place, kneel in front of him, and beg him to take me away. The moment I kneel in front of him, I feel that I have torn my self-esteem and shame and trampled on my feet He said no, he said unless I was his wife, how could it work? Otherwise, how could the United Front policy take care of me? I said, I will marry you, I will marry you, I will marry you... ..." Xiaoyue raised her face, Zhang Meng's tears fell on her daughter's head.Xiaoyue wiped away the tears from her mother's cheeks with her hands. Zhang Meng continued: "I said this sentence several times in a row...he kept shaking his head. He said, we are all under the age of twenty-five. It is impossible to issue us a marriage certificate. I was in a hurry. I didn't care about anything at the time. I said that if you still don't hate me, let me actually become your wife! Then you can It proves that I am pregnant with your child, and I can’t get rid of me even if I want to! He stared at me blankly, as if he didn’t understand what I meant at all. And I took off my coat and lay on the bed On the snow that was more than a foot thick. Then, I took off the padded jacket... On that dry and cold night, on that night with a big and full moon, in a remote place far away from the company, in order to return to the city, to return to your grandma Surrounded by the filial piety of an only child...I gave myself...to him..." Xiaoyue also cried: "Mom, stop talking, I can't listen anymore, I'm so sad for you..." "Yes, a mother shouldn't tell her daughter such things. Besides, you are a girl. But you won't be ashamed of your mother just because you heard this, will you?" Xiao Yue shook her head with tears in her eyes. Zhang Meng continued: "Afterwards, he asked me if I regretted it? I said no. He said, then I will be responsible to you to the end. He said that if he can't take me away, he will not leave." Xiao Yue interjected, "So, he's not bad?" Zhang Meng smiled wryly and shook his head and said: "Sooner or later, he will go abroad to inherit a large inheritance. This has been approved by the relevant United Front Work Department. It is impossible for him to take me abroad again, because his relatives abroad will never allow him to have It belonged to a mainland wife. When he declared that he and I were not the only ones who were leaving the Corps, the whole regiment was in an uproar, like an earthquake of magnitude 12. It was really done back then, and I was ordered I went to the regiment hospital for an examination—it turned out that I was not pregnant. Later, I was put under surveillance and was not allowed to have any contact with him. Some people even suspected that I was crazy to want to return to the city. "Fortunately, a female educated youth from Beijing who took care of me was very sympathetic to me, and secretly released me several times at night to have trysts with him. At that time, we seemed to be angry with someone. After each tryst, we both knelt on the snow. , pray to God. Daughter, you finally came in our prayers..." Xiao Yue looked up at her mother and smiled, and Zhang Meng also smiled. Zhang Meng continued: "He went to the regiment health center more than once to make a fuss, insisting that the first test was unreliable. They had no choice but to conduct a second test for my mother, and the results puzzled the chemists." Xiao Yue said: "Mom, I never thought I would be involved in such a fun story before I was born..." "Daughter, you listened to it today and thought it was fun, but it was not fun for my mother back then! The day we both left the Corps, no one gave us... my quilt, coat, cotton jacket, even hat and On the gloves, when I fell asleep the first night, words such as 'shameful', 'deserter', 'shameless', 'educated youth scum' were secretly written in ink... Mom finally achieved her goal, But your grandma also went soon. You were born at the end of that year. When you were three months old, I went through the divorce procedure with your father. This is our previous agreement. Before he went abroad, he asked me if I hated him I said I was grateful to him, and I meant it. He said, since I am grateful to him, then remember his words, he never had a wife like me, nor a daughter. Never treat people Mention the relationship we had as a husband and wife, never inquire about his whereabouts in this world. I swear to God, I will keep my word. The death of your grandma, the price I paid to return to her, to your grandpa It had a great emotional and psychological impact on him, and soon he also fell ill in depression. After a few months, he fell ill and died half a year later. Since then, I have no relatives in this world, only you, my daughter. In the Corps, my mother still has a monthly salary, but in the suburbs and rural areas, it becomes work points, almost no mechanized farm work, which is much more tiring than when I was in the Corps.” During Zhang Meng's narration, Xiaoyue ran to the balcony to grab the snow, squeezed it into snow balls, and threw them in all directions. Zhang Meng fell silent as if realizing something. Xiao Yue said, "Tell me." Zhang Meng said: "Stop talking, I think my daughter has listened patiently enough!" She looked into the distance, the snow was still falling on the ground, the roofs and roofs in the distance were all white, and the trees looked like clusters of silver coral. Zhang Meng went to make the quilt and tidy the bed, Xiaoyue stood aside and watched, she suddenly asked: "You gave me to a fellow, what did you think back then?" Zhang Meng stopped, looked at her daughter, and said honestly: "I think, I have paid so much for returning to the city, and the result is that I am worse than the Corps. It is too reconciled! Besides, I will always rely on me to earn work points from now on." If I feed you, it will not only delay my life, but also your life. If I don't achieve my goal, I will not be a human being." Xiao Yue asked again: "Is it that simple?" "It's that simple." "It sounds like there is something for my sake..." "Yes. Of course there is something for your sake..." "I heard from my godmother, that aunt named Hao Mei brought a daughter who didn't have a father when she returned to the city?" Zhang Meng asked, "What do you call her?" "Auntie! What's the matter? The name is wrong? In our village, women in their forties are called Auntie..." "Yeah, it's time for you to be called aunt by your generation. But, don't call her that from now on, just call her auntie!" Xiao Yue said, "You haven't answered what I asked you yet!" Zhang Meng was stunned, and said in a low voice, "She is bringing a daughter who has no father." "Why can't you?" Zhang Meng couldn't help looking at her daughter again. Xiao Yue pressed her and asked, "Then why couldn't you take me with you back then?" Zhang Meng said slowly: "At this point, my mother admits that I am not as good as your Aunt Hao Mei. She seems to be quite weak, but in fact she has a very strong side. Mom seems to give people a very strong impression. Strong, very assertive and decisive in handling things, but actually has a weak side. Besides, my household registration is in the countryside. Once your grandfather passed away, there was no one on the household registration, and the house would be transferred to the public. There is no place to live. Without a registered permanent residence, without a place to live, and with a child, you won’t even be able to find a job to earn a living.” She tidied up the bed, gently pushed her daughter out of the bedroom, and said to a child who couldn't take care of herself: "Come, wash your face and brush your teeth." Xiaoyue turned around and said, "Then, after you have a job and a house, why don't you pick me up?" Zhang Meng said: "Actually, my mother has been in the city until a large number of educated youths have returned to the city, and then I got the hukou according to the opportunity. After more than half a year after the hukou was registered, I didn't have a formal job. It took another year before I got a job." This suite." "But you still don't pick me up..." Zhang Meng thought for a moment and asked, "Did you skip school?" Xiao Yue said: "I have escaped, I often play truant. Why don't I stop studying until the third grade of primary school?" "How do you feel about skipping school?" "It's like committing a crime. Seeing the teacher again is like seeing a judge. Playing truant on the first day, not daring to enter the school on the second day, and not wanting to enter the school on the third day. I hope I can forget that I am a student." "That's why mom often wants to pick you up, but doesn't go every time..." "You also wished that it would be better if you could forget that you were married, a mother, and had a daughter?" Zhang Meng was silent for a moment, then nodded. Xiao Yue said: "Your attitude is quite honest. Then forget it, and I won't interrogate you anymore, so I will give you leniency!" Zhang Meng walked up to her daughter and held her daughter's face in both hands: "In terms of fulfilling mother's responsibilities and obligations, mother admits that mother is a truant, mother is so sorry for you..." Xiaoyue took her mother's hand off her face and said, "Come on, don't admit your mistakes forever. I am soft-hearted. Didn't I say it before? I forgive you. From now on, you will make up for your mistakes with practical actions! " Zhang Meng smiled and kissed her daughter's face. The phone rings.Zhang Meng went to answer the phone, and Xiao Yue went to wash her face and brush her teeth. Zhang Meng said to the phone: "It's me... this... I didn't forget... um... ok... I... nothing happened... ok..." She put down the phone and stood by the table in a daze for a moment. Xiaoyue poked her soaped head out of the washroom and said, "Mom, you didn't book me a stepdad?" Zhang Meng turned her face away and looked at her daughter in a daze. Xiao Yue asked again: "Say it!" Zhang Meng smiled covertly and said, "No, no..." "Then I'm relieved! I don't want to live with a stepdad ever again!" When the mother and daughter were eating at the dinner table, Zhang Meng said, "Daughter, after dinner, I'll call your Uncle Xu and ask him to accompany you to buy a bed." Xiao Yue said, "Mom, let's go together..." Zhang Meng said a bit embarrassed: "Mom won't go, mom...There are still many things in the company today..." Xiao Yue nodded in agreement. After Zhang Meng went to work, Tsui Hark accompanied Xiaoyue to a furniture store to buy a bed. Tsui Hark: "Should I just buy a small one?" Xiao Yue said, "No, buy the big one." Tsui Hark looked at her puzzled, and she said, "Maybe sometimes I want to sleep in the same bed with my mother." Tsui Hark said, "Aren't you ashamed to want to sleep on the same bed with your mother at such an age?" "What's there to be ashamed of! Maybe my mother sometimes wants to sleep in the same bed with me. For many years, I have always dreamed of sleeping in the same bed with my mother, chatting with my mother while Gradually fell asleep..." Tsui Hark pointed to a bed and asked, "How about this one?" Xiao Yue shook her head and said, "The style is not good." Tsui Hark said: "Hey, when a little country bumpkin comes to the city, he still thinks that the style of the bed in the city is not good! It's a pity that no one sells a heated kang. I will definitely buy a heated kang for you!" Xiao Yue punched him and said, "Fuck you!"
Zhang Meng came to Wu Zhenqing's house and had a long talk with Ge Hong. Ge Hong's mood was greatly affected after listening to it. She looked at Zhang Meng and said sympathetically: "I heard about your matter back then, but I don't know it very well. Half-believed... Listening to you today, I... Zhang Meng, we all thought you were the lucky one among us. Before Zhenqing and I got married, especially when he confessed to me frankly that he loved you, I I still secretly envy you to death in my heart, cursing God for being so unfair..." Zhang Meng smiled wryly, and pointed to the phone... Ge Hong grabbed the phone and dialed: "Hey what! I'm your wife! Go home quickly, I know you just arrived at the company! No matter how busy you are, you have to come back quickly! Of course it's urgent! It's urgent and important!" Wu Zhenqing's car stopped in front of a beautiful new building, he got out of the car, looked at the note with the address, and looked at the building number.The driver said, "Boss, that's right, it's this building!" All the people who live there are people with senior professional titles. Wu Zhenqing walked upstairs, stopped outside a security door, and rang the doorbell; the door was opened by a man of about forty-six, wearing glasses, gentle, asking through the security door, "Who are you looking for?" Wu Zhenqing asked: "Does Mr. Wu live here?" The other party said: "I don't know!" After speaking, he closed the door. Wu Zhenqing looked at the note in his hand strangely. He was about to go downstairs when the door opened again. The person in the door said: "Uh, I forgot, my surname is also Wu, which Mr. Wu are you looking for?" Wu Zhenqing said: "Mr. Wu Shiyan, Associate Professor of Social Ethics." The man said, "It's my... where are you from?" Wu Zhenqing handed over his business card through the crack of the anti-theft door. The other party looked at it carefully and asked, "What's the matter?" Wu Zhenqing said: "Zhang Meng entrusted me to come." "Huh?... What's the relationship between you...?" "Friend, very close friend." "Well?" Wu Zhenqing pointed to the door and said, "By the way, I don't have the habit of talking with visitors through the security door." Wu Shiyan opened the anti-theft door and said, "I'm sorry, since I'm Mengmeng's friend, please come in." After Wu Zhenqing entered, Wu Shiyan said, "Please change your shoes, the carpet just laid..." Wu Zhenqing said: "It's a no-brainer reminder, but I have this habit." After the other party led him into the living room, he said, "We are getting married soon. Of course I mean Mengmeng and I." Wu Zhenqing looked around, the interior was quite comfortable and elegant, and there was an enlarged photo hanging on the wall—in the photo, both Zhang Meng and Wu Shiyan were smiling at Wu Zhenqing. Wu Shiyan glanced at the photo happily and said, "I call her Mengmeng, you are not confused about who I am talking about, are you?" Wu Zhenqing said, "Not at all." Wu Shiyan said, "Please sit down." Wu Zhenqing sat down, and Wu Shiyan sat next to him, chattering: "I like to call her Mengmeng. From the perspective of accepting psychology, Mengmeng is more intimate than Xiaomeng or Meng. Women are like kittens and puppies." , they tend to be particularly sensitive to nicknames. Do you agree?" "Generally...agree..." "An hour ago, I called her and asked her to take a look at our new home. Are you satisfied with the decoration..." Wu Zhenqing said blankly, "I think she will be very satisfied." "I'm so glad you said that. We'll have it together..." Wu Zhenqing asked, "Who?" Wu Shiyan hurriedly said: "You misunderstood, I am referring to this family. Of course Mengmeng is owned by me alone. Although she is in her forties, she has a good temperament, and she still looks very beautiful, doesn't she?" "yes." "We shall be very happy. Don't you think so?" Wu Zhenqing smiled: "I don't have any objections to this point. I came to visit you precisely because she entrusted me to talk to you about something related to your future happiness." "Huh?" Wu Shiyan looked all ears. Wu Zhenqing said: "She once hinted to you that she is a married woman, right?" "Well... she said this kind of thing, it was when we were closest, so, I can't believe that it is a hint. I think it is just a woman like her, in order to please men , or in order to test men, they showed little cunning, little tricks, and said some jokes." Wu Zhenqing continued: "She also hinted to you that she has a daughter, right?" "No, it's not like that..." "Not what?" "She said she did, but I think, I think..." Wu Zhenqing said: "Do you think it's just a woman's little cunning, tricks, just some jokes?" "right." Wu Zhenqing said: "It seems that she is wrong. She should not be vague on this point, but should tell you clearly..." Wu Shiyan couldn't help looking at Wu Zhenqing, and stood up slowly. Wu Zhenqing looked at him and said, "You'd better sit down, I'm not used to talking to someone I have to look up to. Especially when this person is a man like me." Wu Shiyan sat down slowly again, but still looked at Wu Zhenqing. Wu Zhenqing said: "It seems that you are also wrong. You are an associate professor of psychology, and you seem to have a deep understanding of women. You should not take her words as jokes again and again." Wu Shiyan said: "You are here..." "I am entrusted by her to come here to tell you that she is really a married woman with a daughter. Moreover, her daughter is eighteen years old this year. She used to be fostered by a farmer's family in the suburbs, and now , or more precisely, yesterday, suddenly appeared in front of her, and she no longer wants to be separated from her daughter. She will start to fulfill the responsibility to her daughter that a mother has never fulfilled in the past. " Wu Shiyan stared blankly at the photo on the wall. Wu Zhenqing took out a cigarette and asked, "One?" "I won't, I won't..." Wu Shiyan said, but took the cigarette in his hand. Wu Zhenqing lit a cigarette for him and himself.For a while they smoked in silence, looking at the pictures. Wu Zhenqing added: "She still wants me to tell you the truth—her daughter doesn't have an urban hukou, only has a third-grade elementary school education, and her education is not good enough..." Wu Shiyan interrupted him, and said hastily, "Tell me now, what should I do?" Wu Zhenqing stared at him for a while, then asked, "Do you really love her?" "Love……" "Love?" "Love..." Wu Zhenqing continued: "She also loves you very much. She didn't ask me to declare to you that she didn't want to be your wife anymore. On the contrary, she very much hoped to still be your wife, and even didn't force you to be your wife at this time. The family accommodates her daughter. You know, she also has a house. My wife and I have recognized her daughter as a goddaughter, and I will also fulfill my responsibility and obligation to that child. She only hopes that you can Facing the fact that she has an eighteen-year-old daughter, I hope you can accept this fact." Wu Shiyan smoked deeply. Wu Zhenqing said with a sigh: "She thinks that you will be somewhat psychologically prepared. I am sorry, but you are not psychologically prepared." Wu Shiyan suddenly patted the coffee table: "I've never believed that before, how could I be mentally prepared for this!" Wu Zhenqing hurriedly said: "Don't be impulsive. Yes, you have always regarded her words as a woman testing a man's cunning, tricks, and jokes when she is intimate with a man." Wu Shiyan was silent again, smoking continuously. Wu Zhenqing said: "I'm leaving, you think about it, if you still want her to be your wife, of course it's best to go to her for an interview, if... On the contrary, you can call me." Wu Shiyan was silent, staring at the photo. Wu Zhenqing stood up, glanced at him, and walked out. Wu Shiyan suddenly shouted: "Wait!" He also stood up, "There is nothing to consider! It is about the sacred word love and the happiness of married life, what else is there to consider! Love is not giving in to anything of……" Wu Zhenqing looked at the other party, gradually smiled, and patted the other party's shoulder: "Well said. My surname is Wu, and your surname is also Wu. I can't write two Wus in one stroke. A man surnamed Wu should be like this!" Wu Shiyan went to pull off the photo frame, wanting to take out the photo. Wu Zhenqing asked strangely: "You...what are you doing?" Wu Shiyan finally vented and said: "This is unreasonable! They are all about to get married, and suddenly they become a second-hand product! There is also an 18-year-old daughter! There is no household registration! There is only a third-grade education in elementary school, and there is still a lack of education! Damn it Damn it! What's the matter with her being the only woman left in this world? You tell her that soon, I will have a mistress younger and more beautiful than her!" He was clumsy and didn't know how to get the picture out of the frame. Wu Zhenqing suddenly realized, he stepped over, grabbed the photo frame, held one end of it with both hands, and slapped it flat on the table. Wu Shiyan took a step back in surprise, dumbfounded. Wu Zhenqing took out the photo from the frame, tore it in half, threw one half on the table, stared at him, suppressed the sudden anger in his heart and said, "Isn't this very simple? You are so fucking stupid!" Wu Shiyan felt sorry for the photo frame, picked it up and looked at it absent-mindedly: "You ruined it, it's very expensive!" Wu Zhenqing took out a hundred-yuan bill from his inner pocket, and slapped it on the table contemptuously: "Give me back." Wu Shiyan looked at the money and said, "What? I don't owe you anything! I don't owe her anything either!" Wu Zhenqing said word by word: "Give me back my business card!" The other party fumbled in his pocket, failed to find the business card, found it on the coffee table, and pointed, "It's over there, take it." Wu Zhenqing said angrily: "I gave it to you with both hands, now I want you to return it to me with both hands!" The other party picked up the business card, and as expected, he gave it back with both hands, as if a good man would not suffer the loss in front of him. In front of the other party, Wu Zhenqing put the business card back into the exquisite business card box, and said with a respectful and respectful expression and tone: "Professor, no, Mr. Associate Professor of Psychology, thank you for what you told me about The experience of women and love, disturbing..." He turned around and walked away.
At Wu Zhenqing's house, Ge Hong was comforting Zhang Meng.She said: "Don't worry, just wait patiently with me. This kind of thing is almost like negotiating, and it takes a lot of time!" The door slammed, and Wu Zhenqing came back.Ge Hong and Zhang Meng looked at him expectantly, Wu Zhenqing sat on the sofa sullenly, not looking at them, but his gaze didn't know where to look.Ge Hong walked up to him and asked, "Have you been there?" Wu Zhenqing let out a "hmm". Ge Hong asked again: "Why did you come back so soon?" Wu Zhenqing said angrily: "Is he going to have an attitude soon?" Zhang Meng understood everything, lowered her eyes and lowered her head, and the atmosphere suddenly became solemn. Ge Hong looked at Zhang Meng, looked at Wu Zhenqing, got up and exited silently, turned around at the door, and pointed to Zhang Meng towards Wu Zhenqing. She quietly left home. Wu Zhenqing and Zhang Meng were sitting on one side of the room, and he watched her with gentle eyes gradually. Zhang Meng turned around, leaned on the back of the sofa, and cried in a low voice. Wu Zhenqing got up and walked over, sat beside her, patted her shoulder lightly with one hand, and said softly: "Don't cry. I don't think he is worthy of you either." He leaned forward, put his elbows on his knees, crossed his fingers, and just continued talking to himself: "Believe it or not, men and women seem to be destined. I liked it so much back then. You, I secretly like you. I have unrequited love all day long, and pretend to hate you on the surface, that is the real unrequited love! After returning to the city, I never die for you, until one day, I suddenly realized, We have no fate. If there is no fate, then there is nothing wrong with it. Knowing this, I will not be hard on you anymore. How could that kid love you more than me? But you cried so sadly for him. It's not fair, it's so unfair! Mengmeng, I'm sorry, let me call you that once too! I learned from that kid. You have experienced a lot, at what age and under what circumstances! You don't Have you all survived? In comparison, the experience of me, Xiao Song, Tsui Hark, and Debao cannot be compared with that of you and Hao Mei. For this, I admit that women are stronger than men. You and Hao Mei Mei, is stronger than the four of us. I admire Hao Mei, and I admire you too. But when you cry, you are too embarrassed. Isn’t he the only man left in the world, so it’s not worth being sad at all!” He seemed to feel that something was wrong, so he stopped talking, turned to look at Zhang Meng, she had stopped crying a long time ago.She was peeling pears. She peeled a dozen pears in a small bamboo basket and stacked them on a tray to form a multi-layered "tower", with orange petals embedded in each layer. Wu Zhenqing said, "Aren't you crying anymore?" Zhang Meng had calmed down and said, "I can't stop crying!" Wu Zhenqing pointed to the "Pear Tower" and asked, "What kind of hobby is this?" Zhang Meng said: "This hobby is good for the body and good for microcirculation." "Really?" Wu Zhenqing got up and left for a while, brought back a small basket of apples, and put them in front of Zhang Meng, "There are no more pears, so the apples are okay too? You can peel them all, so we can save trouble when we eat them!" He took a bite of a peeled pear and retreated to his original seat, watching Zhang Meng peel the apple from a distance. Zhang Meng looked at him while peeling the apple. The two suddenly couldn't help laughing, and both laughed.
Ge Hong went downstairs, wandering back and forth.Feeling a little uneasy, and having no other place to go, a young girl just came out of the building, and she stopped her: "Xiaoling, what are you doing?" Xiao Ling: "Go to the street and call my dad!" Ge Hong said: "Don't run too much errands, and you may run into someone else occupying it. Come to my house and call!" "I keep calling your home, I'm so embarrassed!" "Neighbors, why are you embarrassed to call more times?" Ge Hong said, took out the key, and stuffed it in the girl's hand. Xiaoling asked, "Auntie, aren't you going home?" "I'm cool here! How beautiful the snow is!" Xiaoling took the key and looked at Ge Hong in confusion.Ge Hong whispered again: "Let's take a look for auntie, what is your uncle doing at home, is there any mischief?" Xiaoling entered the building door again in doubt. Ge Hong patted the snow on his body, feeling cold, turned up his collar, stomped his feet, and raised his wrist to look at his watch. She stamped out a circle on the snow.After more than ten minutes, Xiaoling came out, returned her key and said, "Auntie, I've called, thank you!" Ge Hong asked: "What is your uncle doing at home?" Xiaoling said: "I heard him laughing outside the door, and when I entered the room, I didn't see him being mischievous. He was still laughing, and an aunt was also laughing." "Laugh?" Ge Hong asked again. "Yeah, I still eat pears. One sits here and the other sits there, smiling happily." Xiaoling left.Ge Hong said to herself: "I'm smiling happily and eating pears...then why do I stand here and continue to suffer from the cold?" She ran upstairs. Ge Hong entered the room, and saw Zhang Meng laughing on the sofa, she asked Wu Zhenqing, "What are you talking about, to make our sisters laugh like this?" She said, sitting next to Zhang Meng, and also picked up a slice of peeled pear to eat. Wu Zhenqing said: "I was telling her that when I wrote essays in elementary school, I not only wrote typos, missing words, but also loved to describe indiscriminately. Once, I described our music teacher, a pair of big watery eyes. It is shining under the temples. The Chinese teacher commented that it is not our beautiful music teacher, but a horse. In a composition describing the grand occasion of the festival, I wrote a sentence, women in clothes came in the parade Ladies and gentlemen, the emotions of the viewers reached a climax, and three exclamation marks were added after it. The teacher's comment was, would people be very excited because women wear clothes? Actually, what I want to write is wearing floral clothes, and I missed a "flower" 'Character……" Zhang Meng hugged Ge Hong's shoulder again and laughed. Ge Hong said: "As long as you believe in him, you will reward him with a smile!" Unexpectedly, Zhang Meng put his arm around her shoulder and smiled, and then started to sob again. Wu Zhenqing said to Ge Hong: "Look at you, as soon as you come back, the situation has changed." Ge Hong hurriedly persuaded: "My dear sisters, don't cry, don't cry. Oh, you peel these pears and apples really well, it seems that they don't have long skin..."——Wu Zhenqing gave Wu Zhenqing a blank look, and muttered Said, "You know how cold it is outside, it's minus twenty-seven degrees today!" Wu Zhenqing also muttered: "Then why don't you wear more clothes? Why come back so early!" At night, when Zhang Meng returned home, she lay on her back on the newly bought bed and lit a slender women's cigarette. Looking at the lingering wisp of green smoke, her thoughts returned to the Great Northern Wilderness...
In the dawn of winter, the cold stars are faintly visible in the sky.The carriage left the company and left the seemingly empty village. In the car, Zhang Meng, wearing a cotton coat, sat with his arms folded and kneeling, with the words "deserter" written in large black characters on his back.She was wearing a corps cap and a big mask, and only a pair of eyes could be seen on her entire face, staring blankly into the distance. The young man sitting beside her said: "Turn your coat inside out!" Zhang Meng said stubbornly: "No." The young man asked softly, "Who are you fighting with? With me? Or with yourself?" Zhang Meng said, "It's also written inside." The young man said helplessly: "If I also have a coat, I will exchange it with you. My coat will be given to the old workers." Zhang Meng said: "Even if you are wearing a coat, I will not accept your kindness." The young man said, "How can you show up at the coach station wearing such a coat?" Zhang Meng said, "Why not?" The young man stopped talking, remained silent for a moment, and then asked the owner of the car: "Uncle Zhang, can you hurry up the car? We are afraid that we will miss today's long-distance bus." The owner of the car said: "Oh, I want to be fast too! But the breeding squad leader chose this old horse for me. It can't run anymore!" The young man said angrily: "Damn, how could the educated youth treat the educated youth like this!" Zhang Meng's gaze changed. There was a gentle slope ahead, and two huge black characters appeared on the snow on the gentle slope - "shameful".It was written on white paper, and water was poured on it, and a layer of ice froze glisteningly, forming one body with the snow on the gentle slope. The young man also found those two words, and said to Zhang Meng, "Just treat yourself as blind!" Zhang Meng said, "That's exactly what I am." The owner of the car also said: "It's outrageous! Why bother to travel so far to create this kind of scenery!" The young man said: "They can't go back to the city, they are angry with us." 马车的一个轮子突然陷入坑中，那坑显然是人为的，经过了伪装，雪下戳出些树枝柳条。 车老板、张萌和男青年先后跳下车，查看车轮的情况。 男青年骂了起来：“太他妈的过分了！” 车老板说：“哼！是那些知青坏小子干的，我回去一定找他们算账！” 说完，他挥鞭催马，男青年和张萌从后拼力推。车轮终于滚出了陷坑，车轮从“可耻”二字碾过。冰雪上留下清晰的轮迹。 长途公共汽车站在望，车老板喝住马，脱下光板皮袄，转身递给张萌说：“姑娘，大爷看上你的这件大衣了，跟大爷换了吧！” 张萌睁大了眼睛，颇感意外地看着车老板，车老板又说：“你这一去，是开弓没有回头箭了。连个念性都不想给大爷留下？快脱啊！” 张萌感动得热泪盈眶……
身边扑通一声，打断了她的回忆；小玥抱着被子枕头，蹦到了张萌的床上。 她问小玥：“怎么又过来和妈睡了？” “一个人睡不着！” “那，不嫌我挤你了？” “这床不是宽多了么！” 小玥说完，她也从床头柜上抓起烟盒，吸起烟来。 张萌诧异地说：“你学会吸烟了？” 小玥满不在乎地说：“什么事儿不得学啊。” 张萌张张嘴，似欲批评，却未说出口。 小玥喷出一口烟，说：“妈，我想知道他长得什么样儿。” "Who?" “还有谁，我亲爸呗！” 张萌说：“这，我都不知他目前在这世界上哪个国家里，怎么办得到？” “我就不相信你没有保留着他的照片！” 张萌犹豫了一下说：“衣柜底层，有个小相册。” 小玥蹦下床，找到了相册，又蹦回床上，交给张萌。 张萌没有接，她说：“这一本相册里，都是他的照片，你自己翻着看吧！” 小玥翻着：“小伙儿长得还挺帅气呢！”张萌说：“不是什么小伙儿，是你的亲父亲……” 小玥突然火了：“他娘的！” 张萌愕然地看着她。小玥将相册往衣柜那儿一抛，朝枕上一倒，怏怏地问：“要是我姥爷活着，能当上市里的头头吧？” 张萌说：“也许吧，不过那也早该退了。” 小玥愤愤地说：“那也是当过！我的命太他妈不好了！我本来应该是共产党的正宗高干的外孙女，是外国大资本家的女儿！这两样得意本来全该属于我的，如今却一样都和我不沾边儿！” 张萌问：“沾边儿又怎么样？” “又怎么样？反正不会是现在这样！哎，妈，你说，会不会有一天，从国外来了一位财大气粗的小姐，找到我头上，说是我同父异母的妹妹，按照我们父亲的遗嘱，要把我接到国外去享福。并且，还分一半儿财产给我，咱们就估计是一亿两亿的吧，就像有些电影里那样儿……” 张萌说：“你最好别做这种梦……” “为什么？从今往后我要天天做这种梦！” 张萌说：“当然，你要是愿意，存在这样的梦想也无妨。” 小玥问：“妈，你干吗非要把我的情绪搞坏呢？” 张萌猛地拉灭了灯：“睡觉！别跟我说话了！” 深夜，穿着睡衣的张萌伫立窗前，在月光下翻看那本相册，而小玥在床上似乎睡得很熟。 张萌的手指抚着照片，她无声地久久吻“他”…… 张萌第二天又很精神地来到公司上班，还没进入自己的办公室，一个女同事过来说：“张主任，经理刚才找过你。” 张萌说：“谢谢！”朝经理办公室走去。 五十多岁的经理看到她进来，叫道：“小张，你来得正好，我有话要和你谈！” 他一边说，一边将一册什么书放回书架，转身见张萌仍站着，又说：“坐呀，站着干什么？” 张萌这才坐下，她显得有几分惴惴不安。 经理归坐到办公桌后，望着她说：“小张，你知道，我一向对你很器重，很信任。对你的工作能力和才干，也很赏识。可是，你却有一点儿……对不起我……” 张萌平静地说：“经理，你炒我的鱿鱼吧！” 经理说：“这是什么话？怎么能那样做？不错，你和我堂弟的事，我已经知道了。千不该，万不该，你的某些事，不该瞒着我。我是你们的介绍人啊！不但你们的关系没有了恢复的可能性，搞得他对我也很恼火哪！” Zhang Meng lowered her head. “不过，我细想了想，也就从内心里原谅你了。”经理接着说，“你们这一代中的许多人，都有坎坷的经历。某些经历，是伤口，还没完全愈合，一碰就会流血。所以，我要对你说的是，这件事过去就过去了吧！我不会因此对你有什么不良的看法的，丝毫也不至于影响我对你的器重、信任和赏识。” 张萌抬起头，眼中充满感激的泪。 经理又说：“前不久，你自己聘的顾问出了那么大的经济问题，公司上下，难免会对你产生一些猜疑和背后议论。现在，大家都在期待着喝你喜酒的时候，你的婚事又化为泡影，大家难免会问个为什么。中国人都有种坏毛病，专爱打听别人的隐私，当他们要打听清楚的时候，就一定能打听清楚，你信不？” 张萌点头。 “真要打听得清清楚楚，那还算好了。”经理说，“最怕捕风捉影，道听途说，弄得心理承受能力很强的人也心烦意乱。所以，我决定委派你到外地去工作一段时间，避避言论。说实话，某些言论，也开始弄得我心烦意乱了。” 张萌问：“哪儿？” 经理说：“海南。咱们在那儿有个子公司，我委派你去任经理，将那儿的经理撤回来，接替你的工作。我再强调一下，我这可纯粹是为你好。而咱们海南的子公司业务开展状况并不令人满意，甚至可以说是令人很不满意。让你去，希望你去振兴一下。” 张萌表情睖睁地听着。经理仍在说着什么，可她却听不到他的话了，她只见他的嘴在动着。后来，他拍拍她的肩，将她送出了办公室。 张萌木然地走在公司的楼道里。 她走到自己办公室的门口，看着门上的牌子，却未开门进去，而缓缓走下了楼梯。 张萌走在街上，街上正大雪纷飞，雪花落在她身上，她越走越远，在雪地上留下了一行脚印。 纷飞的雪花渐渐隐没了她的背影……
On the balcony, flakes of snow fluttered all over the sky. Indoors, the mother and daughter are talking. Zhang Meng said: "Your grandpa fell ill just after he was liberated from the overthrown cadres. Although I was an only child, I had already been sent to the countryside at that time, so it was difficult to return to the city..." Xiao Yue asked, "Grandpa doesn't care about you?" "Of course I want to take care of it. But he dare not. Your grandfather, who obeyed his superiors, was timid and fearful all his life. Because of this, he rose to the top of the ranks and had a successful official career. He went from secretary to section chief to division chief to district party secretary. If he loses his official position, he will feel that life is meaningless. He was flattered to be just liberated. In order to show his revolutionary nature, he has repeatedly declared in public that he will be obliged to educate his daughter, Rooted in the frontier for a lifetime, born as a frontier man, and died as a border ghost. But in the letter he wrote to me, he talked about something else..." "What are you talking about?" "He said that his only regret was that I had gone to the countryside. He said that I had taken a wrong step in this matter. He said that if I could bear it better and didn't take this step, I would lose my life in the city. Li insisted that after he was liberated, it would be logical to stay in the city. He encouraged me to study high school courses by myself, saying that China still needed college students, and that this was the only way for me to save myself. I listened to his words, and every night, I called I secretly studied by myself under the covers with a flashlight, but I was criticized by name. I was criticized for being in the borderlands, but my heart was in the city... The first batch of worker, peasant and soldier students only looked at political performance, and the results of cultural examinations were just references. I didn’t even touch the edge. Up. More than 130 educated youths voted by secret ballot, and I only got one vote... I had the courage to cast my own vote..." Xiaoyue looked at her mother sympathetically. Zhang Meng went on to say: "My hope of returning to the city through legitimate competition was completely shattered. At that time, your grandma had been diagnosed with cancer, and the days to come were numbered. I missed her during the day and at night, just like you once thought about her." me too……" Xiaoyue choked up again: "Mom, stop talking, I don't hate you anymore..." Zhang Meng shook her head and said: "No, I want to tell you. I have never told this to anyone. Now, I can finally tell my own daughter. If I tell you, my mother will also get a share." Liberation!" Xiao Yue nestled her head against her mother's chest. Zhang Meng caressed her hair, and continued: "Among the educated youths in the regiment, there is a young man who is a descendant of a senior general of the Northeast Army. Although it was during the 'Cultural Revolution' period, the United Front still needs to be talked about. So let him be lenient. He was allowed to return to the city in a curve, first from an educated youth in the Corps to an educated youth who jumped in the queue, and then moved his household registration from the suburban countryside to the city. In today's terms, it is the second time in place. He usually has a good impression of me, so one day I secretly Invite him to a remote place, kneel in front of him, and beg him to take me away. The moment I kneel in front of him, I feel that I have torn my self-esteem and shame and trampled on my feet He said no, he said unless I was his wife, how could it work? Otherwise, how could the United Front policy take care of me? I said, I will marry you, I will marry you, I will marry you... ..." Xiaoyue raised her face, Zhang Meng's tears fell on her daughter's head.Xiaoyue wiped away the tears from her mother's cheeks with her hands. Zhang Meng continued: "I said this sentence several times in a row...he kept shaking his head. He said, we are all under the age of twenty-five. It is impossible to issue us a marriage certificate. I was in a hurry. I didn't care about anything at the time. I said that if you still don't hate me, let me actually become your wife! Then you can It proves that I am pregnant with your child, and I can’t get rid of me even if I want to! He stared at me blankly, as if he didn’t understand what I meant at all. And I took off my coat and lay on the bed On the snow that was more than a foot thick. Then, I took off the padded jacket... On that dry and cold night, on that night with a big and full moon, in a remote place far away from the company, in order to return to the city, to return to your grandma Surrounded by the filial piety of an only child...I gave myself...to him..." Xiaoyue also cried: "Mom, stop talking, I can't listen anymore, I'm so sad for you..." "Yes, a mother shouldn't tell her daughter such things. Besides, you are a girl. But you won't be ashamed of your mother just because you heard this, will you?" Xiao Yue shook her head with tears in her eyes. Zhang Meng continued: "Afterwards, he asked me if I regretted it? I said no. He said, then I will be responsible to you to the end. He said that if he can't take me away, he will not leave." Xiao Yue interjected, "So, he's not bad?" Zhang Meng smiled wryly and shook his head and said: "Sooner or later, he will go abroad to inherit a large inheritance. This has been approved by the relevant United Front Work Department. It is impossible for him to take me abroad again, because his relatives abroad will never allow him to have It belonged to a mainland wife. When he declared that he and I were not the only ones who were leaving the Corps, the whole regiment was in an uproar, like an earthquake of magnitude 12. It was really done back then, and I was ordered I went to the regiment hospital for an examination—it turned out that I was not pregnant. Later, I was put under surveillance and was not allowed to have any contact with him. Some people even suspected that I was crazy to want to return to the city. "Fortunately, a female educated youth from Beijing who took care of me was very sympathetic to me, and secretly released me several times at night to have trysts with him. At that time, we seemed to be angry with someone. After each tryst, we both knelt on the snow. , pray to God. Daughter, you finally came in our prayers..." Xiao Yue looked up at her mother and smiled, and Zhang Meng also smiled. Zhang Meng continued: "He went to the regiment health center more than once to make a fuss, insisting that the first test was unreliable. They had no choice but to conduct a second test for my mother, and the results puzzled the chemists." Xiao Yue said: "Mom, I never thought I would be involved in such a fun story before I was born..." "Daughter, you listened to it today and thought it was fun, but it was not fun for my mother back then! The day we both left the Corps, no one gave us... my quilt, coat, cotton jacket, even hat and On the gloves, when I fell asleep the first night, words such as 'shameful', 'deserter', 'shameless', 'educated youth scum' were secretly written in ink... Mom finally achieved her goal, But your grandma also went soon. You were born at the end of that year. When you were three months old, I went through the divorce procedure with your father. This is our previous agreement. Before he went abroad, he asked me if I hated him I said I was grateful to him, and I meant it. He said, since I am grateful to him, then remember his words, he never had a wife like me, nor a daughter. Never treat people Mention the relationship we had as a husband and wife, never inquire about his whereabouts in this world. I swear to God, I will keep my word. The death of your grandma, the price I paid to return to her, to your grandpa It had a great emotional and psychological impact on him, and soon he also fell ill in depression. After a few months, he fell ill and died half a year later. Since then, I have no relatives in this world, only you, my daughter. In the Corps, my mother still has a monthly salary, but in the suburbs and rural areas, it becomes work points, almost no mechanized farm work, which is much more tiring than when I was in the Corps.” During Zhang Meng's narration, Xiaoyue ran to the balcony to grab the snow, squeezed it into snow balls, and threw them in all directions. Zhang Meng fell silent as if realizing something. Xiao Yue said, "Tell me." Zhang Meng said: "Stop talking, I think my daughter has listened patiently enough!" She looked into the distance, the snow was still falling on the ground, the roofs and roofs in the distance were all white, and the trees looked like clusters of silver coral. Zhang Meng went to make the quilt and tidy the bed, Xiaoyue stood aside and watched, she suddenly asked: "You gave me to a fellow, what did you think back then?" Zhang Meng stopped, looked at her daughter, and said honestly: "I think, I have paid so much for returning to the city, and the result is that I am worse than the Corps. It is too reconciled! Besides, I will always rely on me to earn work points from now on." If I feed you, it will not only delay my life, but also your life. If I don't achieve my goal, I will not be a human being." Xiao Yue asked again: "Is it that simple?" "It's that simple." "It sounds like there is something for my sake..." "Yes. Of course there is something for your sake..." "I heard from my godmother, that aunt named Hao Mei brought a daughter who didn't have a father when she returned to the city?" Zhang Meng asked, "What do you call her?" "Auntie! What's the matter? The name is wrong? In our village, women in their forties are called Auntie..." "Yeah, it's time for you to be called aunt by your generation. But, don't call her that from now on, just call her auntie!" Xiao Yue said, "You haven't answered what I asked you yet!" Zhang Meng was stunned, and said in a low voice, "She is bringing a daughter who has no father." "Why can't you?" Zhang Meng couldn't help looking at her daughter again. Xiao Yue pressed her and asked, "Then why couldn't you take me with you back then?" Zhang Meng said slowly: "At this point, my mother admits that I am not as good as your Aunt Hao Mei. She seems to be quite weak, but in fact she has a very strong side. Mom seems to give people a very strong impression. Strong, very assertive and decisive in handling things, but actually has a weak side. Besides, my household registration is in the countryside. Once your grandfather passed away, there was no one on the household registration, and the house would be transferred to the public. There is no place to live. Without a registered permanent residence, without a place to live, and with a child, you won’t even be able to find a job to earn a living.” She tidied up the bed, gently pushed her daughter out of the bedroom, and said to a child who couldn't take care of herself: "Come, wash your face and brush your teeth." Xiaoyue turned around and said, "Then, after you have a job and a house, why don't you pick me up?" Zhang Meng said: "Actually, my mother has been in the city until a large number of educated youths have returned to the city, and then I got the hukou according to the opportunity. After more than half a year after the hukou was registered, I didn't have a formal job. It took another year before I got a job." This suite." "But you still don't pick me up..." Zhang Meng thought for a moment and asked, "Did you skip school?" Xiao Yue said: "I have escaped, I often play truant. Why don't I stop studying until the third grade of primary school?" "How do you feel about skipping school?" "It's like committing a crime. Seeing the teacher again is like seeing a judge. Playing truant on the first day, not daring to enter the school on the second day, and not wanting to enter the school on the third day. I hope I can forget that I am a student." "That's why mom often wants to pick you up, but doesn't go every time..." "You also wished that it would be better if you could forget that you were married, a mother, and had a daughter?" Zhang Meng was silent for a moment, then nodded. Xiao Yue said: "Your attitude is quite honest. Then forget it, and I won't interrogate you anymore, so I will give you leniency!" Zhang Meng walked up to her daughter and held her daughter's face in both hands: "In terms of fulfilling mother's responsibilities and obligations, mother admits that mother is a truant, mother is so sorry for you..." Xiaoyue took her mother's hand off her face and said, "Come on, don't admit your mistakes forever. I am soft-hearted. Didn't I say it before? I forgive you. From now on, you will make up for your mistakes with practical actions! " Zhang Meng smiled and kissed her daughter's face. The phone rings.Zhang Meng went to answer the phone, and Xiao Yue went to wash her face and brush her teeth. Zhang Meng said to the phone: "It's me... this... I didn't forget... um... ok... I... nothing happened... ok..." She put down the phone and stood by the table in a daze for a moment. Xiaoyue poked her soaped head out of the washroom and said, "Mom, you didn't book me a stepdad?" Zhang Meng turned her face away and looked at her daughter in a daze. Xiao Yue asked again: "Say it!" Zhang Meng smiled covertly and said, "No, no..." "Then I'm relieved! I don't want to live with a stepdad ever again!" When the mother and daughter were eating at the dinner table, Zhang Meng said, "Daughter, after dinner, I'll call your Uncle Xu and ask him to accompany you to buy a bed." Xiao Yue said, "Mom, let's go together..." Zhang Meng said a bit embarrassed: "Mom won't go, mom...There are still many things in the company today..." Xiao Yue nodded in agreement. After Zhang Meng went to work, Tsui Hark accompanied Xiaoyue to a furniture store to buy a bed. Tsui Hark: "Should I just buy a small one?" Xiao Yue said, "No, buy the big one." Tsui Hark looked at her puzzled, and she said, "Maybe sometimes I want to sleep in the same bed with my mother." Tsui Hark said, "Aren't you ashamed to want to sleep on the same bed with your mother at such an age?" "What's there to be ashamed of! Maybe my mother sometimes wants to sleep in the same bed with me. For many years, I have always dreamed of sleeping in the same bed with my mother, chatting with my mother while Gradually fell asleep..." Tsui Hark pointed to a bed and asked, "How about this one?" Xiao Yue shook her head and said, "The style is not good." Tsui Hark said: "Hey, when a little country bumpkin comes to the city, he still thinks that the style of the bed in the city is not good! It's a pity that no one sells a heated kang. I will definitely buy a heated kang for you!" Xiao Yue punched him and said, "Fuck you!"
Zhang Meng came to Wu Zhenqing's house and had a long talk with Ge Hong. Ge Hong's mood was greatly affected after listening to it. She looked at Zhang Meng and said sympathetically: "I heard about your matter back then, but I don't know it very well. Half-believed... Listening to you today, I... Zhang Meng, we all thought you were the lucky one among us. Before Zhenqing and I got married, especially when he confessed to me frankly that he loved you, I I still secretly envy you to death in my heart, cursing God for being so unfair..." Zhang Meng smiled wryly, and pointed to the phone... Ge Hong grabbed the phone and dialed: "Hey what! I'm your wife! Go home quickly, I know you just arrived at the company! No matter how busy you are, you have to come back quickly! Of course it's urgent! It's urgent and important!" Wu Zhenqing's car stopped in front of a beautiful new building, he got out of the car, looked at the note with the address, and looked at the building number.The driver said, "Boss, that's right, it's this building!" All the people who live there are people with senior professional titles. Wu Zhenqing walked upstairs, stopped outside a security door, and rang the doorbell; the door was opened by a man of about forty-six, wearing glasses, gentle, asking through the security door, "Who are you looking for?" Wu Zhenqing asked: "Does Mr. Wu live here?" The other party said: "I don't know!" After speaking, he closed the door. Wu Zhenqing looked at the note in his hand strangely. He was about to go downstairs when the door opened again. The person in the door said: "Uh, I forgot, my surname is also Wu, which Mr. Wu are you looking for?" Wu Zhenqing said: "Mr. Wu Shiyan, Associate Professor of Social Ethics." The man said, "It's my... where are you from?" Wu Zhenqing handed over his business card through the crack of the anti-theft door. The other party looked at it carefully and asked, "What's the matter?" Wu Zhenqing said: "Zhang Meng entrusted me to come." "Huh?... What's the relationship between you...?" "Friend, very close friend." "Well?" Wu Zhenqing pointed to the door and said, "By the way, I don't have the habit of talking with visitors through the security door." Wu Shiyan opened the anti-theft door and said, "I'm sorry, since I'm Mengmeng's friend, please come in." After Wu Zhenqing entered, Wu Shiyan said, "Please change your shoes, the carpet just laid..." Wu Zhenqing said: "It's a no-brainer reminder, but I have this habit." After the other party led him into the living room, he said, "We are getting married soon. Of course I mean Mengmeng and I." Wu Zhenqing looked around, the interior was quite comfortable and elegant, and there was an enlarged photo hanging on the wall—in the photo, both Zhang Meng and Wu Shiyan were smiling at Wu Zhenqing. Wu Shiyan glanced at the photo happily and said, "I call her Mengmeng, you are not confused about who I am talking about, are you?" Wu Zhenqing said, "Not at all." Wu Shiyan said, "Please sit down." Wu Zhenqing sat down, and Wu Shiyan sat next to him, chattering: "I like to call her Mengmeng. From the perspective of accepting psychology, Mengmeng is more intimate than Xiaomeng or Meng. Women are like kittens and puppies." , they tend to be particularly sensitive to nicknames. Do you agree?" "Generally...agree..." "An hour ago, I called her and asked her to take a look at our new home. Are you satisfied with the decoration..." Wu Zhenqing said blankly, "I think she will be very satisfied." "I'm so glad you said that. We'll have it together..." Wu Zhenqing asked, "Who?" Wu Shiyan hurriedly said: "You misunderstood, I am referring to this family. Of course Mengmeng is owned by me alone. Although she is in her forties, she has a good temperament, and she still looks very beautiful, doesn't she?" "yes." "We shall be very happy. Don't you think so?" Wu Zhenqing smiled: "I don't have any objections to this point. I came to visit you precisely because she entrusted me to talk to you about something related to your future happiness." "Huh?" Wu Shiyan looked all ears. Wu Zhenqing said: "She once hinted to you that she is a married woman, right?" "Well... she said this kind of thing, it was when we were closest, so, I can't believe that it is a hint. I think it is just a woman like her, in order to please men , or in order to test men, they showed little cunning, little tricks, and said some jokes." Wu Zhenqing continued: "She also hinted to you that she has a daughter, right?" "No, it's not like that..." "Not what?" "She said she did, but I think, I think..." Wu Zhenqing said: "Do you think it's just a woman's little cunning, tricks, just some jokes?" "right." Wu Zhenqing said: "It seems that she is wrong. She should not be vague on this point, but should tell you clearly..." Wu Shiyan couldn't help looking at Wu Zhenqing, and stood up slowly. Wu Zhenqing looked at him and said, "You'd better sit down, I'm not used to talking to someone I have to look up to. Especially when this person is a man like me." Wu Shiyan sat down slowly again, but still looked at Wu Zhenqing. Wu Zhenqing said: "It seems that you are also wrong. You are an associate professor of psychology, and you seem to have a deep understanding of women. You should not take her words as jokes again and again." Wu Shiyan said: "You are here..." "I am entrusted by her to come here to tell you that she is really a married woman with a daughter. Moreover, her daughter is eighteen years old this year. She used to be fostered by a farmer's family in the suburbs, and now , or more precisely, yesterday, suddenly appeared in front of her, and she no longer wants to be separated from her daughter. She will start to fulfill the responsibility to her daughter that a mother has never fulfilled in the past. " Wu Shiyan stared blankly at the photo on the wall. Wu Zhenqing took out a cigarette and asked, "One?" "I won't, I won't..." Wu Shiyan said, but took the cigarette in his hand. Wu Zhenqing lit a cigarette for him and himself.For a while they smoked in silence, looking at the pictures. Wu Zhenqing added: "She still wants me to tell you the truth—her daughter doesn't have an urban hukou, only has a third-grade elementary school education, and her education is not good enough..." Wu Shiyan interrupted him, and said hastily, "Tell me now, what should I do?" Wu Zhenqing stared at him for a while, then asked, "Do you really love her?" "Love……" "Love?" "Love..." Wu Zhenqing continued: "She also loves you very much. She didn't ask me to declare to you that she didn't want to be your wife anymore. On the contrary, she very much hoped to still be your wife, and even didn't force you to be your wife at this time. The family accommodates her daughter. You know, she also has a house. My wife and I have recognized her daughter as a goddaughter, and I will also fulfill my responsibility and obligation to that child. She only hopes that you can Facing the fact that she has an eighteen-year-old daughter, I hope you can accept this fact." Wu Shiyan smoked deeply. Wu Zhenqing said with a sigh: "She thinks that you will be somewhat psychologically prepared. I am sorry, but you are not psychologically prepared." Wu Shiyan suddenly patted the coffee table: "I've never believed that before, how could I be mentally prepared for this!" Wu Zhenqing hurriedly said: "Don't be impulsive. Yes, you have always regarded her words as a woman testing a man's cunning, tricks, and jokes when she is intimate with a man." Wu Shiyan was silent again, smoking continuously. Wu Zhenqing said: "I'm leaving, you think about it, if you still want her to be your wife, of course it's best to go to her for an interview, if... On the contrary, you can call me." Wu Shiyan was silent, staring at the photo. Wu Zhenqing stood up, glanced at him, and walked out. Wu Shiyan suddenly shouted: "Wait!" He also stood up, "There is nothing to consider! It is about the sacred word love and the happiness of married life, what else is there to consider! Love is not giving in to anything of……" Wu Zhenqing looked at the other party, gradually smiled, and patted the other party's shoulder: "Well said. My surname is Wu, and your surname is also Wu. I can't write two Wus in one stroke. A man surnamed Wu should be like this!" Wu Shiyan went to pull off the photo frame, wanting to take out the photo. Wu Zhenqing asked strangely: "You...what are you doing?" Wu Shiyan finally vented and said: "This is unreasonable! They are all about to get married, and suddenly they become a second-hand product! There is also an 18-year-old daughter! There is no household registration! There is only a third-grade education in elementary school, and there is still a lack of education! Damn it Damn it! What's the matter with her being the only woman left in this world? You tell her that soon, I will have a mistress younger and more beautiful than her!" He was clumsy and didn't know how to get the picture out of the frame. Wu Zhenqing suddenly realized, he stepped over, grabbed the photo frame, held one end of it with both hands, and slapped it flat on the table. Wu Shiyan took a step back in surprise, dumbfounded. Wu Zhenqing took out the photo from the frame, tore it in half, threw one half on the table, stared at him, suppressed the sudden anger in his heart and said, "Isn't this very simple? You are so fucking stupid!" Wu Shiyan felt sorry for the photo frame, picked it up and looked at it absent-mindedly: "You ruined it, it's very expensive!" Wu Zhenqing took out a hundred-yuan bill from his inner pocket, and slapped it on the table contemptuously: "Give me back." Wu Shiyan looked at the money and said, "What? I don't owe you anything! I don't owe her anything either!" Wu Zhenqing said word by word: "Give me back my business card!" The other party fumbled in his pocket, failed to find the business card, found it on the coffee table, and pointed, "It's over there, take it." Wu Zhenqing said angrily: "I gave it to you with both hands, now I want you to return it to me with both hands!" The other party picked up the business card, and as expected, he gave it back with both hands, as if a good man would not suffer the loss in front of him. In front of the other party, Wu Zhenqing put the business card back into the exquisite business card box, and said with a respectful and respectful expression and tone: "Professor, no, Mr. Associate Professor of Psychology, thank you for what you told me about The experience of women and love, disturbing..." He turned around and walked away.
At Wu Zhenqing's house, Ge Hong was comforting Zhang Meng.She said: "Don't worry, just wait patiently with me. This kind of thing is almost like negotiating, and it takes a lot of time!" The door slammed, and Wu Zhenqing came back.Ge Hong and Zhang Meng looked at him expectantly, Wu Zhenqing sat on the sofa sullenly, not looking at them, but his gaze didn't know where to look.Ge Hong walked up to him and asked, "Have you been there?" Wu Zhenqing let out a "hmm". Ge Hong asked again: "Why did you come back so soon?" Wu Zhenqing said angrily: "Is he going to have an attitude soon?" Zhang Meng understood everything, lowered her eyes and lowered her head, and the atmosphere suddenly became solemn. Ge Hong looked at Zhang Meng, looked at Wu Zhenqing, got up and exited silently, turned around at the door, and pointed to Zhang Meng towards Wu Zhenqing. She quietly left home. Wu Zhenqing and Zhang Meng were sitting on one side of the room, and he watched her with gentle eyes gradually. Zhang Meng turned around, leaned on the back of the sofa, and cried in a low voice. Wu Zhenqing got up and walked over, sat beside her, patted her shoulder lightly with one hand, and said softly: "Don't cry. I don't think he is worthy of you either." He leaned forward, put his elbows on his knees, crossed his fingers, and just continued talking to himself: "Believe it or not, men and women seem to be destined. I liked it so much back then. You, I secretly like you. I have unrequited love all day long, and pretend to hate you on the surface, that is the real unrequited love! After returning to the city, I never die for you, until one day, I suddenly realized, We have no fate. If there is no fate, then there is nothing wrong with it. Knowing this, I will not be hard on you anymore. How could that kid love you more than me? But you cried so sadly for him. It's not fair, it's so unfair! Mengmeng, I'm sorry, let me call you that once too! I learned from that kid. You have experienced a lot, at what age and under what circumstances! You don't Have you all survived? In comparison, the experience of me, Xiao Song, Tsui Hark, and Debao cannot be compared with that of you and Hao Mei. For this, I admit that women are stronger than men. You and Hao Mei Mei, is stronger than the four of us. I admire Hao Mei, and I admire you too. But when you cry, you are too embarrassed. Isn’t he the only man left in the world, so it’s not worth being sad at all!” He seemed to feel that something was wrong, so he stopped talking, turned to look at Zhang Meng, she had stopped crying a long time ago.She was peeling pears. She peeled a dozen pears in a small bamboo basket and stacked them on a tray to form a multi-layered "tower", with orange petals embedded in each layer. Wu Zhenqing said, "Aren't you crying anymore?" Zhang Meng had calmed down and said, "I can't stop crying!" Wu Zhenqing pointed to the "Pear Tower" and asked, "What kind of hobby is this?" Zhang Meng said: "This hobby is good for the body and good for microcirculation." "Really?" Wu Zhenqing got up and left for a while, brought back a small basket of apples, and put them in front of Zhang Meng, "There are no more pears, so the apples are okay too? You can peel them all, so we can save trouble when we eat them!" He took a bite of a peeled pear and retreated to his original seat, watching Zhang Meng peel the apple from a distance. Zhang Meng looked at him while peeling the apple. The two suddenly couldn't help laughing, and both laughed.
Ge Hong went downstairs, wandering back and forth.Feeling a little uneasy, and having no other place to go, a young girl just came out of the building, and she stopped her: "Xiaoling, what are you doing?" Xiao Ling: "Go to the street and call my dad!" Ge Hong said: "Don't run too much errands, and you may run into someone else occupying it. Come to my house and call!" "I keep calling your home, I'm so embarrassed!" "Neighbors, why are you embarrassed to call more times?" Ge Hong said, took out the key, and stuffed it in the girl's hand. Xiaoling asked, "Auntie, aren't you going home?" "I'm cool here! How beautiful the snow is!" Xiaoling took the key and looked at Ge Hong in confusion.Ge Hong whispered again: "Let's take a look for auntie, what is your uncle doing at home, is there any mischief?" Xiaoling entered the building door again in doubt. Ge Hong patted the snow on his body, feeling cold, turned up his collar, stomped his feet, and raised his wrist to look at his watch. She stamped out a circle on the snow.After more than ten minutes, Xiaoling came out, returned her key and said, "Auntie, I've called, thank you!" Ge Hong asked: "What is your uncle doing at home?" Xiaoling said: "I heard him laughing outside the door, and when I entered the room, I didn't see him being mischievous. He was still laughing, and an aunt was also laughing." "Laugh?" Ge Hong asked again. "Yeah, I still eat pears. One sits here and the other sits there, smiling happily." Xiaoling left.Ge Hong said to herself: "I'm smiling happily and eating pears...then why do I stand here and continue to suffer from the cold?" She ran upstairs. Ge Hong entered the room, and saw Zhang Meng laughing on the sofa, she asked Wu Zhenqing, "What are you talking about, to make our sisters laugh like this?" She said, sitting next to Zhang Meng, and also picked up a slice of peeled pear to eat. Wu Zhenqing said: "I was telling her that when I wrote essays in elementary school, I not only wrote typos, missing words, but also loved to describe indiscriminately. Once, I described our music teacher, a pair of big watery eyes. It is shining under the temples. The Chinese teacher commented that it is not our beautiful music teacher, but a horse. In a composition describing the grand occasion of the festival, I wrote a sentence, women in clothes came in the parade Ladies and gentlemen, the emotions of the viewers reached a climax, and three exclamation marks were added after it. The teacher's comment was, would people be very excited because women wear clothes? Actually, what I want to write is wearing floral clothes, and I missed a "flower" 'Character……" Zhang Meng hugged Ge Hong's shoulder again and laughed. Ge Hong said: "As long as you believe in him, you will reward him with a smile!" Unexpectedly, Zhang Meng put his arm around her shoulder and smiled, and then started to sob again. Wu Zhenqing said to Ge Hong: "Look at you, as soon as you come back, the situation has changed." Ge Hong hurriedly persuaded: "My dear sisters, don't cry, don't cry. Oh, you peel these pears and apples really well, it seems that they don't have long skin..."——Wu Zhenqing gave Wu Zhenqing a blank look, and muttered Said, "You know how cold it is outside, it's minus twenty-seven degrees today!" Wu Zhenqing also muttered: "Then why don't you wear more clothes? Why come back so early!" At night, when Zhang Meng returned home, she lay on her back on the newly bought bed and lit a slender women's cigarette. Looking at the lingering wisp of green smoke, her thoughts returned to the Great Northern Wilderness...
In the dawn of winter, the cold stars are faintly visible in the sky.The carriage left the company and left the seemingly empty village. In the car, Zhang Meng, wearing a cotton coat, sat with his arms folded and kneeling, with the words "deserter" written in large black characters on his back.She was wearing a corps cap and a big mask, and only a pair of eyes could be seen on her entire face, staring blankly into the distance. The young man sitting beside her said: "Turn your coat inside out!" Zhang Meng said stubbornly: "No." The young man asked softly, "Who are you fighting with? With me? Or with yourself?" Zhang Meng said, "It's also written inside." The young man said helplessly: "If I also have a coat, I will exchange it with you. My coat will be given to the old workers." Zhang Meng said: "Even if you are wearing a coat, I will not accept your kindness." The young man said, "How can you show up at the coach station wearing such a coat?" Zhang Meng said, "Why not?" The young man stopped talking, remained silent for a moment, and then asked the owner of the car: "Uncle Zhang, can you hurry up the car? We are afraid that we will miss today's long-distance bus." The owner of the car said: "Oh, I want to be fast too! But the breeding squad leader chose this old horse for me. It can't run anymore!" The young man said angrily: "Damn, how could the educated youth treat the educated youth like this!" Zhang Meng's gaze changed. There was a gentle slope ahead, and two huge black characters appeared on the snow on the gentle slope - "shameful".It was written on white paper, and water was poured on it, and a layer of ice froze glisteningly, forming one body with the snow on the gentle slope. The young man also found those two words, and said to Zhang Meng, "Just treat yourself as blind!" Zhang Meng said, "That's exactly what I am." The owner of the car also said: "It's outrageous! Why bother to travel so far to create this kind of scenery!" The young man said: "They can't go back to the city, they are angry with us." 马车的一个轮子突然陷入坑中，那坑显然是人为的，经过了伪装，雪下戳出些树枝柳条。 车老板、张萌和男青年先后跳下车，查看车轮的情况。 男青年骂了起来：“太他妈的过分了！” 车老板说：“哼！是那些知青坏小子干的，我回去一定找他们算账！” 说完，他挥鞭催马，男青年和张萌从后拼力推。车轮终于滚出了陷坑，车轮从“可耻”二字碾过。冰雪上留下清晰的轮迹。 长途公共汽车站在望，车老板喝住马，脱下光板皮袄，转身递给张萌说：“姑娘，大爷看上你的这件大衣了，跟大爷换了吧！” 张萌睁大了眼睛，颇感意外地看着车老板，车老板又说：“你这一去，是开弓没有回头箭了。连个念性都不想给大爷留下？快脱啊！” 张萌感动得热泪盈眶……
身边扑通一声，打断了她的回忆；小玥抱着被子枕头，蹦到了张萌的床上。 她问小玥：“怎么又过来和妈睡了？” “一个人睡不着！” “那，不嫌我挤你了？” “这床不是宽多了么！” 小玥说完，她也从床头柜上抓起烟盒，吸起烟来。 张萌诧异地说：“你学会吸烟了？” 小玥满不在乎地说：“什么事儿不得学啊。” 张萌张张嘴，似欲批评，却未说出口。 小玥喷出一口烟，说：“妈，我想知道他长得什么样儿。” "Who?" “还有谁，我亲爸呗！” 张萌说：“这，我都不知他目前在这世界上哪个国家里，怎么办得到？” “我就不相信你没有保留着他的照片！” 张萌犹豫了一下说：“衣柜底层，有个小相册。” 小玥蹦下床，找到了相册，又蹦回床上，交给张萌。 张萌没有接，她说：“这一本相册里，都是他的照片，你自己翻着看吧！” 小玥翻着：“小伙儿长得还挺帅气呢！”张萌说：“不是什么小伙儿，是你的亲父亲……” 小玥突然火了：“他娘的！” 张萌愕然地看着她。小玥将相册往衣柜那儿一抛，朝枕上一倒，怏怏地问：“要是我姥爷活着，能当上市里的头头吧？” 张萌说：“也许吧，不过那也早该退了。” 小玥愤愤地说：“那也是当过！我的命太他妈不好了！我本来应该是共产党的正宗高干的外孙女，是外国大资本家的女儿！这两样得意本来全该属于我的，如今却一样都和我不沾边儿！” 张萌问：“沾边儿又怎么样？” “又怎么样？反正不会是现在这样！哎，妈，你说，会不会有一天，从国外来了一位财大气粗的小姐，找到我头上，说是我同父异母的妹妹，按照我们父亲的遗嘱，要把我接到国外去享福。并且，还分一半儿财产给我，咱们就估计是一亿两亿的吧，就像有些电影里那样儿……” 张萌说：“你最好别做这种梦……” “为什么？从今往后我要天天做这种梦！” 张萌说：“当然，你要是愿意，存在这样的梦想也无妨。” 小玥问：“妈，你干吗非要把我的情绪搞坏呢？” 张萌猛地拉灭了灯：“睡觉！别跟我说话了！” 深夜，穿着睡衣的张萌伫立窗前，在月光下翻看那本相册，而小玥在床上似乎睡得很熟。 张萌的手指抚着照片，她无声地久久吻“他”…… 张萌第二天又很精神地来到公司上班，还没进入自己的办公室，一个女同事过来说：“张主任，经理刚才找过你。” 张萌说：“谢谢！”朝经理办公室走去。 五十多岁的经理看到她进来，叫道：“小张，你来得正好，我有话要和你谈！” 他一边说，一边将一册什么书放回书架，转身见张萌仍站着，又说：“坐呀，站着干什么？” 张萌这才坐下，她显得有几分惴惴不安。 经理归坐到办公桌后，望着她说：“小张，你知道，我一向对你很器重，很信任。对你的工作能力和才干，也很赏识。可是，你却有一点儿……对不起我……” 张萌平静地说：“经理，你炒我的鱿鱼吧！” 经理说：“这是什么话？怎么能那样做？不错，你和我堂弟的事，我已经知道了。千不该，万不该，你的某些事，不该瞒着我。我是你们的介绍人啊！不但你们的关系没有了恢复的可能性，搞得他对我也很恼火哪！” Zhang Meng lowered her head. “不过，我细想了想，也就从内心里原谅你了。”经理接着说，“你们这一代中的许多人，都有坎坷的经历。某些经历，是伤口，还没完全愈合，一碰就会流血。所以，我要对你说的是，这件事过去就过去了吧！我不会因此对你有什么不良的看法的，丝毫也不至于影响我对你的器重、信任和赏识。” 张萌抬起头，眼中充满感激的泪。 经理又说：“前不久，你自己聘的顾问出了那么大的经济问题，公司上下，难免会对你产生一些猜疑和背后议论。现在，大家都在期待着喝你喜酒的时候，你的婚事又化为泡影，大家难免会问个为什么。中国人都有种坏毛病，专爱打听别人的隐私，当他们要打听清楚的时候，就一定能打听清楚，你信不？” 张萌点头。 “真要打听得清清楚楚，那还算好了。”经理说，“最怕捕风捉影，道听途说，弄得心理承受能力很强的人也心烦意乱。所以，我决定委派你到外地去工作一段时间，避避言论。说实话，某些言论，也开始弄得我心烦意乱了。” 张萌问：“哪儿？” 经理说：“海南。咱们在那儿有个子公司，我委派你去任经理，将那儿的经理撤回来，接替你的工作。我再强调一下，我这可纯粹是为你好。而咱们海南的子公司业务开展状况并不令人满意，甚至可以说是令人很不满意。让你去，希望你去振兴一下。” 张萌表情睖睁地听着。经理仍在说着什么，可她却听不到他的话了，她只见他的嘴在动着。后来，他拍拍她的肩，将她送出了办公室。 张萌木然地走在公司的楼道里。 她走到自己办公室的门口，看着门上的牌子，却未开门进去，而缓缓走下了楼梯。 张萌走在街上，街上正大雪纷飞，雪花落在她身上，她越走越远，在雪地上留下了一行脚印。 纷飞的雪花渐渐隐没了她的背影……