Chapter 12 Marble (excerpt)-9

People who buy buns also know that he obviously has them: he just doesn't sell them.Because it is not sold, people admire its special character even more. On a rainy day, the girl went to buy buns with an umbrella, and the old man went to buy buns with a stick.Steamed buns are not available, and people feel more satisfied, because this steamed stuffed bun is very precious and rare.Rare things are more expensive, so I feel that the "not necessarily living" buns are better. Ma Bole got up in the morning and ate it as a snack.At four or five o'clock in the afternoon, I felt empty again, so I went to buy buns twice a day.Not only to buy, but also to stand there and watch to see how it is done.In the future, if you leave Wuchang and go to other places, where will this 'not necessarily live?'?It's better to learn early and do it yourself in the future.

This steamed stuffed bun is made of leavened dough like ordinary steamed stuffed buns. It is round and pomegranate, but with a little sugar added to the dough, it tastes sweet.There is also minced meat inside, only this minced meat is different, it is pork minced, the meat is not even cut, first the whole chunk is put into a large pot to cook, and then it is taken out and then cut.If it’s chopped up, it can’t be used as the stuffing of the buns. At least it needs to be fried again. When frying, some bean paste should be added, and nothing else is needed, neither onion nor garlic. This is the key to the "not necessarily living" steamed stuffed bun.

When Ma Bole went to Wang's mansion, he publicized it to Mr. Wang, because Mr. Wang also liked to eat "not necessarily living" steamed stuffed buns the most.The reason why Ma Bole knew this steamed stuffed bun was introduced by Mr. Wang. Ma Bole said that the steamed stuffed bun was not unusual at all, put a little sugar in the noodles, and stir-fry the pork. Miss Wang's family is a refined and gentle girl, she rushes to say: "It's easy to look at flowers, but difficult to embroider. If we can do it, why would they open a bun shop?" The eldest lady of the Wang family is gentle by nature. Although she and Ma Bole played together since they were young, they have both grown up since they haven't seen each other for ten years.Especially Ms. Wang, who was only thirteen years old when she left Qingdao, and is now twenty-three years old.

So when she finished saying this sentence, she felt a little inappropriate, her face was burning with shame, she turned around and ran out of the living room. Because of her panic, she messed up her hair on the door curtain embroidered with gold flowers in red thread.Miss Wang's hair was recently permed and curled, and she went to groom it in front of the mirror. I never thought that in the mirror, the first thing I saw was not my hair, but my terribly red face. It seemed that my face was so red when it was flashing on a rainy night. Why is this?It was so terrible that even she dared not look at it herself.I was very scared in my heart, but I couldn't imagine why there was such a face in the mirror?Never seen it, but never knew it.

So she left the mirror and sat down on her nicely decorated little sofa without combing her hair.Sitting there, the more I think about it, the more angry I get, and the more I think about it, the more I am wronged, and the more I think about it, the more wronged I am.I don't know why, it's like being bullied by others, and this bullying has no facts, so I can't tell anyone about it.If you were a child, you would go to your mother and cry.But now that she has grown up, her mother is not always by her side. For a girl of this age, it is impossible to send someone to invite her to sit beside her and cry.What's more, there is no reason.

So she sat on the sofa, calmed herself down, trying to suppress this kind of sadness that even she didn't want to. Ms. Wang is studying at Wuhan University.Wuhan University is located on Yaoka Mountain in Wuchang. Miss Wang graduated last year, so she doesn't go there often. But every time she thinks about the clear oil and clear water of the East Lake, she always feels nostalgic. In the past, she rowed a boat on the East Lake every day.The dormitory is next to the lake, which can be seen from the window.It didn't feel so good at the time.Looking back now, I feel that the time is so fast that it is like a dream, and three or four years have passed in a hurry.It has been more than a year since I left that school.

Ms. Wang used to have a lover in that school, maybe it wasn't a lover but a friend, but the classmates are easy to say such things. Yesterday, Ms. Wang's friend came to see her and brought her a bouquet of purple wild flowers from the East Lake.She immediately found a vase for the flower, filled it with water, plugged it in, and placed it on the long table in the living room.She intended to take it to her room right away, but she felt that her mother looked embarrassed.In fact, the flower was given to her by her friend. She didn't have to put it in the living room, but I don't know why she reluctantly put it in the living room.

But after a while, as soon as her friend left, she brought the flowers to her room.Because the more she looked at the flower, the more beautiful it was, small flowers, small leaves, and white hearts in the middle of the purple flowers. Now the flower is on her own mirror stand. I heard that he is going to get engaged, I don't know if it is true?When he came yesterday, she wanted to ask him casually as if she were joking, but somehow it got sidetracked. Now she was sitting on the little sofa that she had decorated for herself.When she saw the flowers in the vase, she thought about what happened yesterday.She thinks it's funny, why do we bother to ask him about other people's affairs?

In Ms. Wang's hut, there are books on the window sill and books on the wardrobe, but they are not messy, they are all very neatly arranged.In this small room of hers, no one came in for months and months.But looking at it, it was so tidy, as if it had been waiting for a guest for a long time. Especially the small sofa, the blue sofa cover is decorated with white lace, one piece on the left hand, one piece on the right hand, and one piece on the back.The lace is made by myself with a crochet needle. It is transparent, light and delicate, as if the sofa is not suitable for sitting on, but just for watching and playing.

Now she is still sitting on the sofa, she has been sitting for a long time.She tried to restrain herself, but couldn't.Her eyes were filled with tears, and she didn't know where the sadness came from.She looked at the red umbrella, she felt sad.She took a look at the little purple flower, and she felt aggrieved.She was on the verge of tears when she heard the chatter and laughter of the people in the living room. For some reason, whenever everyone was laughing, she felt lonely instead. Finally, she listened to the parlor door, and Mabel said: "Come tomorrow, come tomorrow..."

The living room was soon silent.Then the whole yard became silent.It was as if a person was sleeping on the bed and suddenly walked into a dream. Ms. Wang heard the voice of Ma Bole saying "come tomorrow, come tomorrow", just like the voice of "come tomorrow" when they played together ten years ago and went home after playing.She can also hear that the ending of the word "lai" is particularly emphasized, and it has not been changed so far. But that was ten years ago, and now ten years later, how time flies, children have become adults.In a few years you will be old, and your youth will be gone. How can a person grow old when he has just turned twenty?But ordinary ladies are often very proud because they are full of youth. So tears flowed down, and Ms. Wang cried. She thought of many things in her childhood, climbing a ladder to catch house sparrows on the eaves,...catching frogs in the ditch on rainy days,...the frogs caught were full of anger,... When Miss Wang thought of this, she was sad and happy at the same time, so she cried until her eyes were dripping with tears, and the corner of her mouth was smiling. She felt that Paul was the same as before, but that everything had grown a little bit, for example, his nose was a little bigger, his eyes were a little longer, and it seemed that his black eyeballs were bigger than before. The more she thought about it, the more interesting it became. People grow up suddenly. "Not only grow up, but also grow old!" Miss Wang was thinking this way in her heart, and when she thought of this, she suddenly felt that Paul was not only different from before, but also completely different, completely changed. The eyes, which had been black and blue before, were now yellow, all yellow, both the white and the black.Besides, the lips were thicker than before. How can a person change completely?It was terrible, the head became bigger and the body became longer.Even the voice of speaking has changed, the voice is many times thicker than before, as if it used to be a twig and now it has grown into a beam. Who can say that the beam today is the same twig as before? Woolen cloth?It's completely different. It's not a day since Ma Bole came to Hankou, and it's not the first time she saw him today, so why did she only consider him today?It seems that Ma Bole has not changed in ten years, but he has grown up after a while. But Ms. Wang herself is not aware of it, because her mind is very sensitive these days, she suddenly thinks about things, suddenly thinks about things.And it is easy to get angry, if you say you don't eat, you don't eat, if you say watch a movie, you go to the movie. It's been a long time like this. She is so sad and anxious that she herself feels that there is no central theme. However, she often thought, why should a person be "engaged"? And especially recently, is that friend really getting engaged?She had planned to ask him casually for a long time, but she always forgot when they met and remembered when they left.Sometimes I think of it in person, but I never ask.That's someone else's business. Ask him what to do? But once in his own room, or when he feels lonely, it is always easy to think about this matter. When I thought about this matter, I didn't have any other thoughts or special opinions. I just thought that it was a good marriage, what kind of marriage was engaged for no reason?She just felt a little strange. Ms. Wang's worries these days are all about this "strangeness". There seems to be new blood flowing in her blood, and her evaluation of everything is different from before. What she liked before, she now opposes; what she thought was a virtue before, now she thinks it is despicable ,shame. She used to like to wear flat shoes, she said that flat shoes are good for the hygiene of the feet; but now she is against it, and she wears high heels.In the past, she thought that a woman who was gentle and gentle was the most elegant; now she gave a new comment, she said that it was just a humble existence with no personality at all. Not only this kind of thing, but many more, in short, she didn't have a process in the process, and suddenly, she used a new perspective to re-evaluate everything she encountered. One day when it was raining lightly, she decided to go to the movies, so she left wearing a raincoat and holding an umbrella.She was very stubborn, and her mother advised her not to stop.When you come to the street, you don't take a rickshaw, just keep walking.Why does she feel that a person is being pulled by others?What a shame. She walked to Hanyangmen Wharf and boarded a ship across the river.The people on the boat are crowded.She had already sat down when she had a seat, but when she saw a country woman standing with a child in her arms, she stood up and offered the seat to her.She thought to herself: "The Chinese really lack compassion." As she stood there waiting, she felt someone talking behind her, and the first thing that made her feel that maybe it was the classmate, the one who was going to be engaged. When I looked back, it was Ma Aile. This thought was wrong, and it seemed that I was taken aback. Ma Bole was alone, without his wife or children. Originally, they played together when they were young. At that time, who had a wife and who had children? They separated a year before Marble got married.So today's meeting on the ship is like the scene when we played together in the past. It is very free and there is no need to stick to etiquette. But at first they didn't say anything, they both felt unfamiliar with each other, and they just nodded at each other.It seems very ordinary, just met somewhere and not a friend.After a few seconds, Ma Bole started to say the first sentence, but the words were heard by the other party, and they could be heard as soon as they heard them. They were not what he should say.That said something like this: "Are you going across the river?" It's simple, and then it's gone. If it wasn't for a friend of Ma Bole who patted him on the shoulder and called him aside at this time, he would have been even more embarrassing in the end. They didn't see each other until they got off the ship.Miss Wang ran away as soon as she got off the boat. She hurried away as if she was running.Along the way, the asphalt road was not very level, and it was full of water everywhere. When she ran to the cinema indiscriminately, her shoes and socks were wet. She stood there buying tickets.When the ticket seller put the ticket in her hand, she didn't know what she was doing. It was only when the second person pushed her away that she realized that she was going to watch a movie. As for Ma Bole, he has just been freed from great pain, that is to say, after suffering all kinds of hardships and fleeing, today is always the final victory. It doesn't matter if his victory is real or not, anyway, there is a "not necessarily living" steamed stuffed bun eating next to him.This is the whole situation in front of me. So I was complacent all day long, except for looking at the pie tree outside the window one day, I didn't care about anything else. If his wife quarrels with him, he will hide or ignore it; or if he gets angry, he will say: "Go back to Qingdao!" He knew that they couldn't go back, so he yelled very vigorously, deliberately annoying his wife. His wife has her old problem again, but she always cries.I saw it in Marble, and I just thought it was funny.He thought: Why are you crying?Why does a person cry so much? His wife's crying, obviously he didn't take it to heart, he didn't feel pity or hate, he just ignored her without feeling. When he got up in the morning, he went to the bun shop of "Not necessarily living" to buy buns.I slept in the second half of the day and went to buy buns when I woke up. In addition to watching the cake tree to buy buns, he often went to Hankou to find out who came and who left.Some of them he knew, and some he didn't know.But after listening to it, I am generally satisfied, because there are more and more people, and later I can't even find a house.It is rare to catch up with him so happy.So only he is blessed, luckily.After Ma Bole was liberated from the great pain, he no longer needed anything, and lived a full life.There may be some changes in the future, but it will stop here for the time being. So he couldn't consider Miss Wang's opposite enthusiasm for him at all, and he didn't know it at all. But ever since that meeting on the boat, Ma Bole has more or less felt a little wrong, that is, when he got off the boat, he wanted to find her, but he couldn't find her, couldn't see her, and didn't know how to run away. Where did you go.He clearly remembered the place where she was standing, but there was no her there. It's okay if you don't see it.Ma Bole walked slowly. He planned to talk to a friend who just came from Shanghai, to hear or have some new news. I heard that the "Dachang" was the most intense fight. Is it China? Is it possible for soldiers to retreat to the second line of defense?Go talk and see. Ma Bole walked slowly while thinking.On the shore, when he looked up, he saw Miss Wang again. Miss Wang was running ahead, holding an umbrella. He wanted to greet her, but he had nothing to do, so he watched Miss Wang walk away like this.A blue raincoat with a blue umbrella is a very deep color.Ma Bole watched her turn, and then went his own way. The next day, Ma Bole went to buy the "not necessarily living" steamed stuffed buns as usual.I didn't feel hungry at first, so I planned not to buy it, but the children insisted on buying it.He thought that since it became a habit, he went with him.But after buying it, he didn't eat it. He brushed his clothes with a brush and went out. When he came back, Jage still held two buns in his hand and said: "Dad, this is yours." In the second half of the day, Marble went out again.The wife thought that he was going to Snake Mountain to drink tea again, and asked him to take Xiao Yage with him, thinking that he was making trouble at home.Ma Bole left without taking anything with him. He came to Wang's house twice, and it seemed that Miss Wang was not at home.Originally, he himself didn't admit that he came to see Miss Wang, so he sat in the living room and talked with Mrs. Wang for a while.After talking for a while, he got up and left. At night, he came again, and it happened that there was no one in the living room. He said that both Mr. Wang and Mrs. Wang had gone out, and they said they were going to watch a Han opera across the river. Marble then asked: "Is Missy at home?" When Ma Bole came to the Wang family, he never asked their young lady alone.So the female worker seemed to be taken aback, paused for a while, and then said: "I gonna go see." Once out of the living room door, the female worker asked a little girl in the corridor: "Miss said she was going to the theater with the old man, did you go?" Before the little maid opened her mouth, the eldest lady came out from behind the thick red curtain.She came out to pour water, holding a teacup in her hand.She was obviously lying on the bed, her hair was a little messed up, her collar was unbuttoned, and she was wearing slippers. "What are you shouting about? Once the old lady goes out, you will rebel this time." They said: "No, Mr. Ma is looking for you." What did she think Mr. Ma was?she asked: "Phone?" The female worker said: "In the living room." Miss Wang put down the cup and put it on the tea table by the door.Looking back to the living room, she saw Ma Bole through the gap in the curtain. she says: "Paul!" Because she was a little startled, she said so.She would have gone back into the room, combed her hair, or put on a pair of shoes, but could not do so, but buttoned her collar and went into the drawing room.Because she clearly saw it, Paul had already seen her through the gap in the wide-open door curtain.In addition, recently she thought it was not good for a woman to be too gentle, so she approached the living room openly. Seeing how happy and generous she came, Ma Bole pointed to a book that was open on the long table and said: "I have read this book, it is very good, and the translation is not bad." Miss Wang took the book in her hand, closed it, and looked at the cover: "That's right, I borrowed it and haven't read it yet." So put it aside. Marble said: "I'm going to borrow a few books to read, do you have any books on hand?" Miss Wang said: "I'm a mess, do you want to take a look?" Miss Wang brought Ma Bole to her own room.While walking, he said: "It is impossible for a person not to read." Marble also said: "Chinese people, that is, Chinese people don't read. People in the world, which country doesn't read?" After entering the small room, Ma Bole still said: "She is a foreign woman, even if she goes to the park, she also holds a book in her hand. She is coaxing her child while reading." "It's really different. We Chinese are too backward. Once you leave the school, who will study! Those who study are really fools." Miss Wang's room is very clean, and the books are placed on the window sill.They went to read the book first, and Ma Bole chose a few at random before sitting down.here Miss Wang sat on the sofa and asked Ma Bole to sit on the small stool in front of the mirror stand. This room is very good, but it is a bit small. It looks like a model at the first grade of junior high school, but it is also because it is small that it has a small and exquisite taste. They went back into the drawing room without talking.In the living room, I talked about the situation of Wuhan University and the professors.There is also a joke, in which there is such a professor who tells the students that it does not matter if the country dies, as long as they study hard... They talked pleasantly, as if they were in a social situation, respecting each other without touching anyone's emotional side. The maid would offer a cup of tea every once in a while.The two of them sat there like guests, or thought that they were the masters of the house, one was the young master and the other was the young lady. It was past nine o'clock before Ma Bole left. The two old people went to the theater, but they haven't come back yet. Miss Wang wanted to write two letters, but failed to finish them, so she fell asleep on the bed.After sleeping for a while, but still not falling asleep, I heard my mother came back.Passed the drawing-room to her own room.It's very interesting, as she walks, she talks about how the clowns in the Han opera are so different, and the white on the nose is also strangely smeared! Ms. Wang turned off the lights, because there was a moon, and the room was brightly white.It's very interesting to stay up at night. Once you hear it far away, you can't hear the rickshaw bell on Mopan Street during the day, but you can hear it now.The world shrinks at night.She turned over and she seemed to be asleep. Chapter VII From then on, Ma Bole came to Wang's house every day.Because of this, Ms. Wang often stayed at home. She wanted to watch a movie or do something, but she didn't go out because she thought that Paul might be coming. In the living room, it is often like a party, talking very late.Mrs. Wang is also with her every night, and if Mr. Wang has nothing to do, there is no one who will not stay with her. It has been like this for a long time, and it seems that the former friendship that has died, or that has been isolated by time and completely non-existent, has recovered. The old lady often pointed to her daughter and said that brother Paul was like this or that when he was young, as if he had never left in these years, and sometimes the spoken language was so close as if he was treating her own son. When it was time to eat, Ma Bole would sit on the table and eat together, just like family members. There were often four people sitting on the square table, two old people and two children. It's been a long time like this.One night when I was having dinner, a phone call came suddenly and the young lady was called out. The phone was at the end of the aisle.The eldest lady ran out to answer the phone, but never came back.The maid came in and reported: "Miss doesn't eat anymore. The old lady should go and have a look!" When everyone heard it, it turned out that someone was crying in the back room. Miss Wang lay on the bed, buried her hair in her hands, her eyes and nose were wet from crying.The small desk lamp next to it radiates brilliance from under the vermilion umbrella. Because the umbrella is a little too small, the light seems to be surrounded by the umbrella, creating a particularly condensed copper-yellow light. halo. The old lady asked her why she was crying, but she said nothing.The old lady put down the red curtain and went to the door, as if she was very relieved that her daughter would suddenly cry like this, and she went back to the table in the living room to eat. Mr. Wang didn't ask in detail, he was still talking with Ma Paile about the wounded soldiers on the front line. Ma Paile said that the war this time is a problem for the whole Chinese nation, so the whole country, the rich should contribute money, and the powerful should contribute; he also talked about his determination to serve as a soldier to fight Japan. He said: I have already sent a letter to my family asking for my father's permission that I want to be a soldier..." When Mr. Wang heard it, he seemed to disagree, saying: "Being a soldier is naturally the duty of a patriotic man, but it is enough to have money and strength, and I think the rich don't need to work hard." Ma Bole saw that the words of being a soldier seemed a little too hot, and I was afraid that he didn't care much about Mr. Wang.So he said: "Being a soldier, intellectuals like us don't want it! It's just the so-called soldier, that is, going to the front to do rescue work." Mr. Wang felt that doing ambulance work was still a kind of intense thought, so he dissuaded him and said: "I don't think it is necessary. If you want to dedicate yourself to the country, why must you go to the front. The chairman said that the rear is more important than the front, and the rear is also in need of talents, such as the Price Evaluation Committee, where I work... People's livelihood is the first priority.What is people's livelihood?It is people's food, especially during the Anti-Japanese War, the price should never be raised.In view of this, our far-sighted government has to make preparations early.The Commodity Price Review Committee is mainly the general authority that manages people's food. " After finishing speaking, he asked Ma Paile: "Would you like to find a little work, too?" He didn't know how to answer this question that was beyond Ma's expectation, and he thought for a while before saying: "Yes." "Then I can place you in the Price Evaluation Committee." Marble quickly said: "Isn't it busy over there?" Mr. Wang said: "Originally there was nothing to do, what would you be busy with? It's just a meeting every half a month, everyone talks, discusses and discusses." As soon as he finished speaking, the phone rang, and the phone rang in the corridor, and it took a long time for someone to answer the call. Mr. Wang said: "What are they doing one by one? Gradually, no one even answers the phone." He was obviously talking about the maids. There was obviously something wrong with this call.When Mr. Wang went over there, he simply said a few words and then transferred back. Sitting at the table, he quickly ate half a bowl of rice.I didn't finish the half bowl in the past for half an hour, but now I finish the remaining half bowl in a minute. He stood up and said while putting down the long gown that was rolled up during the meal. "I hoarded some coal, and now I'm planning to sell it because the market price is high... We're talking, but I forgot about it. That's what the call is for." As soon as he turned around, Mr. Wang put on his black fedora hat, picked up his cane, and walked steadily.It seems that if the country's affairs are not placed on such a person, it will be unreliable. After Mr. Wang left, Ma Bole also felt that he should leave, as if the old lady was deliberately accompanying her alone, which was a bit uncomfortable.But I thought of this place several times, but I didn't leave again, because Miss Wang was there, and there has been no sound until now.Probably stopped crying, but why didn't they come out? Ma Bole very much hoped that the old lady could go into the young lady's room once.But the old lady seemed to have forgotten about the lady crying.hope to hear from old lady As for her situation, Ma Bole deliberately mentioned it several times, saying: "Miss, the scenery of Wuhan University is so beautiful, haven't you been there?" The old lady said: "Yes, I've been there before, and I still go here in summer, and it's Guiying (daughter's name) who took me...the water is so green, and the mountains are beautiful..." Ma Bole saw that the old lady's name was Guiying, so he was also called Guiying, and he said: "Didn't Guiying do something after graduation?" The old lady said: "No, that child has no patience. Unlike when he was young, his temper has grown bad when he grows up." Marble could think of nothing more to say.I want to go, but I want to sit for a while; there is no need to sit for a while, but I don't want to go, so I am hesitating in the living room while flipping through the newspaper. It wasn't until very late, when Mr. Wang came back, that Ma Bole came out from the yard with a small garden. He was very depressed, he walked under the rack of thorn roses, and let the stems of the thorn roses prick his cheek once.He didn't puncture it when he touched it with his hand, but that hand touched the small scar on his nose where he fell on the Songjiang Bridge. The night was clear, with a big moon shining overhead.Ma Bole walked out of the courtyard. The male worker of Wang's house closed the door behind him and said to him: "Mr. Ma, didn't you see it? There's a new batch of wounded soldiers!" The male worker has a pockmarked face, and he could see it clearly at night. It can be seen that the moon is very big and bright. As soon as I walked out of the alley, I looked back on the street and saw a hospital for wounded soldiers.Six or seven hundred wounded soldiers were accommodated there: Ma Bole knew that there was nothing to see there, so he walked home without looking back. Unexpectedly, there is also a hospital for wounded soldiers on Mopan Street where he lives.There was a group of soldiers mumbling and talking. He thought it must be the new wounded soldier.When I passed by, I found out that it was not a real place, but a temporary dormitory for soldiers. Those soldiers were all neatly dressed and were not injured. With the full moon all over his body, Ma Bole knocked on the door of the house.Because there were many families living in that yard, it was not his wife who opened the door for him, but a woman downstairs. After a while, Marble went upstairs. Upstairs the wife was still awake, with a needle and thread in her hand, not knowing what she was sewing. Ma Bole got angry when he saw it, and he sewed all day long. "It's getting late, why did you come back?" Marble lay down on his little cot: "I just came back, and I can't come back after serving as a soldier!" The wife was very puzzled, but she thought that maybe there was something wrong outside, so she ignored him and turned off the light after a while. chapter eight It was not long before Marble fell in love.They set up a very sloppy date. They agreed to meet at the edge of Ziyang Lake at nine o'clock at night. The Wang family's residence is on Ziyang Lake, not far away. Ten minutes before nine o'clock, Ma Bole had arrived at the stone bridge on the lake in advance and was wandering. He thought she was coming too.Time passed minute by minute.He walked around the lake and looked at the lights of the houses all around the lake. After a while Miss Wang came.Ma Bole was thinking: what should she say first when she comes?Or talk about wounded soldiers, or talk about the war ahead.But when Ms. Wang came, they didn't talk about these things, and they didn't talk about anything. They were very generous with each other. As soon as they came together, they walked forward side by side, as if they were classmates, and they were walking on the playground after class. None of them said anything.The road around the lake is very secluded.There were very few lights, and occasionally, except for a car coming from the opposite side, which shook them brightly, the rest of the time, they walked forward in the dark.It's as if they chose a dark path on purpose. They walked for seven or eight minutes before they came across a brightly lit street.But a minute passed.They still disappeared into the dark night.because neither of them The sound, so the stones under their feet seemed to be talking instead of them, always making crackling noises. After half an hour they came out onto a wide avenue.Along that road, if you go further, there are not many people's lights.Only tens of miles away, there is a light in that place. Maybe some village on the outskirts of the city? Marble thought so. They went on for a while, and two dogs came up on the field and barked at them for a while. They were not afraid, but stopped for a while, as if the dog was admonishing them; "Go back!" So they turned around and walked back. Still not saying a word on the road. They walked for another half an hour, and returned to the bridge.They all felt that the road was too short to be worth walking, and that they would come to an end as soon as they walked, and quickly return to their original place.So I found a new road, also with very little light.They walked for another half an hour. They were freer where there was no light; and when they were in the light, the two of them hung their heads.They are very well-behaved and never look at each other.We are embarrassed to each other, as if there shouldn't be so many lights in this world.They ducked away quickly.Even if there was a dirty path next to them, they walked up it quickly. It was one o'clock, and they arrived at the gate of Wang's house.Ms. Wang stopped and stood at the door, as if she was about to say goodbye; but she didn't knock on the door, she walked to one side.Ma Bole also followed.So I walked around the house for a week.Then came to the door. Miss Wang stopped again at the door, and stood there, as if she was about to go in; but she didn't do that, and walked away again.Marble followed up again.Go around the house again.This time, as soon as she got to the door, Miss Wang stepped forward and knocked on the knocker. Ma Bole also stood a little away, showing a respectful look, turned around, and left first, so as not to be seen by the housekeeper. After hearing the latch on the door, Ma Bole seemed to wake up from a dream.The one who walks this small road is still alone.Some of these small stone roads have been trampled flat over the years, some have been trampled out of pits, and some have been shaken, washed away by the rain, have changed positions, or have been pressed by themselves. others. It was dark, and the street lights were all out.Marble groped along the path. He heard someone running behind him, calling him.This was unexpected, so he stopped and waited. After a while, it really was Miss Wang who had just been sent to the yard came running.She stepped on the stone slabs on the path and rattled loudly. When she ran to her, Ma Bole asked her: "Why are you here again?" Miss Wang smiled.Not at all the quiet look of the previous moment. Ma Paile said: "Are you not sleeping?" Miss Wang said: I can not sleep…… "Why can't I sleep?" "I don't know." Marble stretched out his hand, intending to hug her.And want to kiss her on the cheek, or her hair. At that time, when Miss Wang raised her hand a little, he thought that she was going to reject him, so he didn't do that. After a minute, they walked as usual.Sometimes they walk side by side; sometimes Ma Bole walks in front and Miss Wang walks behind; sometimes, when encountering rough roads, Ma Bole always tries to go forward and hold her arm.But he couldn't do it, because he thought Miss Wang probably didn't want him to do that. After this night's walk, Ma Bole did not sleep all night.It was past two o'clock when he came back. In another hour the rooster crowed and the sky turned pale.He lay on the bed with his eyes open.The whole family slept very sweetly, and the people in all the rooms in the yard were silent at all. 只有他一个陷入这不幸之中。 第二天早晨一起来，马伯乐就写了一封信。那信的最后的署名，写了“你的保罗”。这是多么勇敢的行为。 写完了，他本想亲自送去，但一想不大好，还是贴了邮票送信筒吧。 这信王小姐读后大大地感动，因为实在写的太好了（马伯乐当年想要写小说的那种工夫没有用上，而今竞用在了这封信上了的原故。） 他们很快地又布置了一个约会。在这约会上马伯乐换了很整齐的衣裳，而且戴了手套。他装扮得好像一个新郎似的了。 王小姐无论说什么，马伯乐总是一律驳倒她。 王小姐说： “一个人结婚不是合理的吗？” Marble said: “结婚是一种罪恶。” 王小姐说： “假若是从心所愿的，那就不在此例了。” Marble said: “不，一律都是罪恶的。” 马伯乐这样热情的态度，使王小姐十分同情，于是把她近来的生活状况都告诉了他。 她的那位快要订婚的朋友，不但没有订婚，而且提出向她求婚的要求来了。 她把这问题公开地提出来，让马伯乐帮着她在理论上分析一下。 马伯乐一听，这简直不是什么问题，而是故意来打击他。 所以他想了一想，没有立刻就回答。他实在并不相信会有这么巧的事情。 马伯乐站起来，提议要离开这吃茶店，回家去。 说实在的，他口袋里还有一封写好的信，还没有拿出来呢。现在也用不着拿出来了。 他想既然是这样的一个女子，人人都可以向她求婚，那还有什么高贵？去她的吧！ 王小姐恳求他，再坐一会不可以吗？他只说了一声“不了”，站起来就走。 他想：她原来已经有人了。 王小姐回到家里，喝了父亲的许多白兰地酒。醉了，醉得很厉害，第二天一天不能够吃什么，只是哭。 母亲从来没有谈过她的亲事，自从她长了这么大一字没有提过。 母亲现在问她了： “你若是心目中有谁，你只管告诉娘，只要是家财身份不太差，是没有不随你的意的。” 母亲看她百般不说，就用好言好语来劝着： “你长了这么大，娘没有不随着你的，你有什么心事，你只管讲。” 母亲越说，女儿就越哭得厉害。到后来母亲什么法子也没有，只说： “别哭了，好孩子别哭了，哭坏了。” 到了第二天，才算勉强地起来了，坐在客厅沙发上陪着父亲谈了一会话。 正这时候马伯乐来了，在院子里边和花匠谈着话。 王小姐一听是马伯乐就跑到自己的屋子去了。 马伯乐是非常懊悔的，在他第一步踏进客厅的时候，他的脸都红了。他怕她就在客厅里，若是她在的话，他真要跑到她膝前去跪下，请她饶怒了他吧。 恰好她没有在，马伯乐才万幸地坐在沙发上。 今天，他不是自己内心的不平静，还是怎么的，就处处觉得与平常有些不同，他想或者他们的事情，家里晓得了吧？似乎那花匠也说东说西地故意在试探他。 老太太今天也好像对他疏远了一些，谈起话来都是很简单的，似乎在招待客人似的。女工进来倒了一杯茶来，他也觉得那女工用了特别的眼光在看着他。小丫环刚才在过道上看见他，就缩头缩脑地回去了，好像是看见了生人似的，并不像平常那样，笑嘻嘻的，就像见着她们家里的一员似的。 王老先生，今天并没有和他长谈，只说了三言两语，就拿了一张报纸到外房里去看报了。 每天来，一进这客厅就热热闹闹的，王老先生，老太太，大小姐，都在一起坐着；而今天，都变了，难道说变得这么快吗？ 大小姐似乎不在家里的样子，难道她出去了吗？她到哪里去了？这可真想不到了。若是知道的话，可以到什么地方去找她。 她真的不在家里吗？为什么她不来？若是她真的没有在家，那倒还好；若是在家故意不出来，这可就不好办了。 他想要问一问小丫环，这可怎么问，真有点不好意思。假若那小丫环早已在怀着敌意的话，一问更糟了。 若是在平常，他随便就问了，但是在此刻他就有点不敢问，怕是一问这事情就要揭发了似的，或者老太太就要从这客厅里把他给赶出去。他甚至想到在王家他是犯了罪的。 为什么到人家家里来，装着拜访所有的人的样子，而实际上就是单单为着人家的小姐呢！ 马伯乐，他已经看出来了，王老太太的那闪着光的眼睛里边，绝对地已经完全晓得了他的秘密。 好像他犯了一件案子，虽然这案子还隐藏着没有爆发，但是非要爆发的，而且不久就要爆发，已经是不用思索的了，非是那么回子事不可，是不可救药的了。 他本想站起来就走的，但是他已经被他自己就先给吓瘫了，吓得不能动了。他的头上一阵一阵冒汗，他的身上一阵一阵像火烧的一样热。 再过一会，假若身上的血流再加一点热力，怕是他就要融化掉了。 一个人是不是会像一个雪人似的那样融化掉？他自己一阵一阵竞好像坐在云彩上了似的，已经被飘得昏昏沉沉的了。 王老先生在卧房里一咳嗽，把他吓了一抖。小猫在他的皮鞋上憧了一下，他下意识地竟以为那是一条蛇，那感觉是恶劣的。 王老太太问： “马太太为什么好些日子不见了呢？” 马伯乐想，她问到她干什么？是不是从她那里走漏了什么消息？难道说，这事情太太也晓得了吗？真是天呵，岂有此理！ 他又想，那不会的吧，有什么呢！只写过一次信，见过两次面，谈了一谈。何况太太不能晓得，就是晓得了，也没有什么越轨。但是那夜在小板路上，他差一点没有吻了她。现在想起来，才知道那真是万幸的。假若真吻着她了，到现在不成了证据吗？但是又一想： “这不是很可笑吗？就是吻了，有谁会看见呢？” 他自己问着他自己。在那么黑的巷子里，就是吻着她了，谁还能够看见呢？没有证据的事情为什么要承认呢？ 马伯乐想到这里就正大光明了起来，畏畏缩缩是万事失败之母，用不着懦怯。在这世界上人人都是强盗，何必自己一定要负责到底，迈开大步踏了过去吧。 “小韩，……” 他向小丫环招呼着，下边紧接着就要问大小姐。 但是只叫了个小韩，往下的几个字就说不出来了。 明明知道说出来不要紧，但是就是说不出来了，无论如何也说不出来了。 等一分钟过后，一切机会都失去了。刚刚小韩站在他旁边的时候，问他要做什么，他说要把今天的报纸拿来看一看。 现在他手里就拿着那报纸，拿着这“劳什子”做什么呢？他非常怨恨那报纸，都是它误了事。若不是它，现在不已经明白了嘛，大小姐到底是在不在家。 接着他又做了第二个企图，想要说请老太太看电影去，并请大小姐。这是很自然的，就这么说吧。 但是没有说出来，因为他发现了这么说不大好。于是又换了个方法，又觉得不大好。实在都不大好。怎么好的方法就全没有呢！这可真奇怪。 到了后来，脑子已经不能想了，想什么，什么不对，都完完全全做不到。 于是什么人工的方法也不迫求了，他就听天由命了起来。 他希望大小姐从她的房子自动地走出来，让他毫不费力地就能看到她。所以他从那门帘的缝中巧妙地注意着门帘以外的动静。那过道上有一个玻璃杯响，他以为是她出来了。小丫环登登地从过道跑过去，他以为一定是大小姐在招呼她，或者是招呼她打一盆洗脸水，她洗了脸，大概就要出来了。 过了半天工夫，没有出来，分明他是陷到失望里去了；但是他不让他自己失望，他设法救了他自己，他想一定是她在穿衣裳。又过了好些工夫，还是没有动静。本来他的猜测都是丝毫没有凭据的，本不可靠的，但是他不那么想。他想她或者是在梳头发，就像隔着窗子、门他就看到了的那样。 这一梳头发，可始终没有梳完，大小姐也始终没有出来。 “不出来就不出来吧”，马伯乐在心里说着，“人是无情的呀。” 他含着眼泪走出了王家。他走在巷子里，他的眼睛上像是罩着一块不十分干净的玻璃似的，什么也看不清楚了。 他的脚步因此也散了，伸出去的脚，没有力量，似乎在那石板路上飘着，而踏不住那石板路了。 马伯乐被过重的悲哀冲击得好像一团汽沫似的那么轻浮。他勉强地挣扎着才算走到了家里，差一点没有被冲到阴沟里去。向前走，终于也就走到家里来了。这小巷子上边是天，下边是石板，而两边又都是墙壁，周密得像一个筒子似的，就是存心打算溜到一边去也是不可能的。 马伯乐从此失恋了，而是真正的失恋。他做了不少诗，而且都是新诗。 王小姐不见他，那是实实在在的了。他写了两回信去，也都一点用处没有，于是他感到王小姐毕竟是出身高贵。高贵的女子，对于恋爱是纯洁的，是不可玷污的，所以王家的公主一怒就不可收拾了，那是必然的。 一方面虽然马伯乐是被舍弃了，但是一想到若是被公主舍弃了，别说舍弃一次，就是舍弃十次也是值得的，因为她是公主呵。因为公主是世界上很少有的。 所以马伯乐五六天没有出屋，就坐在屋里向着那窗外的枇杷树作了很多诗。 篇篇都是珍贵的杰作，篇篇都好得不得了。 马伯乐新作的诗，都保存着。诗实在是作得很好，但是没有人鉴赏。他拿给朋友们看的时候，朋友们看了之后，是不知所云的，因为马伯乐恋爱这件事情人家都不晓得。这使马伯乐很生气，他说中国人不能够鉴赏艺术。外国的诗人常常把自己的诗当着朋友去读的。而在中国什么都谈不到的，真他妈的中国人！ 于是还是自己念上一遍吧： 多么值得怀念呵！ 当她抚模着我的胸口的时候。 好是好，就是有点大不贴题，这一点马伯乐自己也晓得。本来那王小姐的手连触也没触到的，怎么会抚摸到胸口上去了！不过作诗都是这么作，若是不这样，那还叫什么诗呢？ 于是马伯乐又念第二篇： 我的胸中永远存留着她的影子， 因为她的头发是那么温香， 好像五月的玫瑰， 好像八月的桂花。 我吻了她的卷发不知多少次， 这使我一生也不能忘记。 马伯乐念完了，他自己也茫然了，他究竟去吻过谁的头发呢，他自己也不晓得，不过觉得究竟是吻过的样子，不然怎么能够这样的感动呢。 第三篇尤其好： 我为你， 我舍弃了我的生命， 我为你， 我舍弃了我的一切。 这诗一看上去就好像要自杀似的，令人很害怕：好就好在这自杀上，因为歌德的《少年维特的烦恼》，维特不是自杀了吗？这正好就和维特完全一样。 不但如此，马伯乐真的半夜半夜地坐着，他想这有什么办法呢！失恋就是失恋了。 “既失了的就不能再得。” “既去了的就不能够再来。” “人生本是如此的。” “大风之中飘落叶，小雨之中泥上松。” “冬天来了，天气就冷了。” “时间过去了，就不能再回来了。” “十二个月是一年，一年有四季。一切都是命定的，又有什么办法呢！” 马伯乐到王家去了几次，连王小姐的影子都没有看到。因此他越被拒绝的厉害，他就越觉得王小姐高贵。不但王小姐一个人是有高贵的情操的，就连王小姐的父母，他也觉得比从前有价值了；若是没有高贵的父母，怎么能产生高贵的女儿呢？不但王家的人，就连那麻子脸花匠兼看门倌，他也觉得比从前似乎文明了许多。每当他出来进去时，那花匠都是点头称是，好像外国人家里的洋BOY一样。 马伯乐再在王家里出入，就有些不自然了，就连王家的花园，他也通体地感到比从前不知庄严了多少倍。 王家忽然全都高贵起来了。但这么快，究竟是不可能的，于是他只能承认他自己是瞎子。不是瞎子是什么？眼前摆着一块钻石，竟当玻璃看了。 马伯乐虽被拒绝了，但走出王家大门的时候，总是用含着眼泪的眼睛，回过头去恋恋不舍地望一望建筑得那么干净整齐的小院。 因此他往往带着一种又甜蜜、又悲哀的感觉回到家去。 后来他也不存心一定要见王小姐了，他觉得一见到，反而把这种关系破坏了呢。倒不如常常能围着这王家的花园转一圈，倒能培养出高贵的情绪来。 但是王小姐不久就订婚了，而且要出嫁了。 在出嫁的前两天，来了一张请帖，是用王小姐父母的名义而发出来的。 马伯乐想也没想到，她会这么快就出嫁的。出嫁也不要紧，但是不能这么快，哪有这么快的道理。 又加上那请帖上那生疏的男人的名字，非常庸俗，叫作什么“李长春”。 什么长春不长春的，马伯乐随手就把那请帖撕掉了，详细的结婚日子还没有看清。太太打算要去参加王小姐的婚礼，就把那些碎片拾了起来，企图拼凑起来再看一遍，不料刚拾起来，又被马伯乐给打散了。 马伯乐说：“若是高贵的出身还能叫这名字——长春，我看可别短命。” 从此马伯乐不再作诗，又开始吃起“未必居”的包子来了。 “久违了，包子。”当他拿起一个包子来，他含着眼泪向自己说。同时想：为什么有了王小姐就忘记了包子？ 一边想着，一边就把包子吃下去了，包子在他嘴里被咬着，越来越小，而相反马伯乐的眼睛越来越大，因为那眼睛充满了眼泪，像两股小泉水似的。假若他的眼睛稍稍一缩小，眼泪立刻就要流出来的。男子大丈夫能够随便就流泪吗？只好设法把眼睛尽量睁大。 一连串吃了八个包子之后，才觉得对于这包子总不算是无情，总算是对得起它。于是放下不吃了。到床上去睡一觉。马伯乐这一觉睡得格外清爽，醒来之后，一心要打日本去。因为大街上正走着军队，唱着抗战歌曲，唱得实在好听。 马伯乐跑到街口去一看，说：“这么热闹，哪能不打日本去！” Chapter nine 江汉关前边过着成千成万的军队，各个唱着抗战歌曲，一夜夜地过，一清早一清早地过。广西军，广东军，湖南，湖北，各处的军队，都常常来往在黄鹤楼和江汉关之间。 不管老幼瘦胖，都肩着枪，唱着歌，眼睛望着前方，英勇地负着守卫祖国的责任。看了这景象，民众们都各个庄严静穆，切切实实地感到我伟大的中华民族灭亡不了。 但很少数的，也有些个不长进的民众，看了十冬腊月那些广西军穿着单裤，冻得个个打抖的时候，说： “哟：还穿着单裤，我们穿着棉裤还冷呢。” 说这话的多半是妇人女子，至于男人，没有说的。马伯乐一回头就看见一个卖麻花的，他提着小筐，白了头发，是个六十多岁的老头说的。 马伯乐这回可上了火了： “女人们说这话，你男子大丈夫，也说得出口来？” 马伯乐一伸手就把老头的盛着麻花的筐子给捉住了。捉住之后，还在抖着，似乎要把那筐里的东西给倾倒马路上去，看热闹的人，立刻就围上来一大群。马伯乐本来打算饶了他就算了，因为那老头吓得浑身发抖，那灰白色的、好像大病初愈的那不健康的眼睛，含满了眼泪。 马伯乐虽然心里气愤，会有如此不长进的老头生在中华民国；但基于人道这一点上，他那么大年纪放了他也就算了。 但是不成，看热闹的人围上来一大群，马伯乐于是说： “他破坏军心！” 他说完了，他自己也后悔了，不过话挤在喉咙里哪能不说呢？ 立刻那老头就被一个拉洋车的踢倒。 宪兵走来了，宪兵说： “打呀，打汉奸。” ．那筐子里的被打落的麻花散了满地。 军队还在结队过着，唱着抗战歌曲，肩着枪，非常英勇。 观众们的鉴赏方法是非常高明的，冻得脸色发白，嘴唇发青一面，他们能够设法看不见；而专看那肩着枪的肩膀，和那正在唱着抗战歌曲的宽大的胸膛。也不是说看不到弱的那一面，也许看到了不敢说，或者是觉得不应该说，怕宪兵打。 在黄昏的时候，马伯乐常喜欢到江边上走走，而黄昏过兵的事情又多，去看一看那白亮亮的江水，去观一观那英勇的战士，在吃饱了饭之后，不亦一大乐趣哉！ 马伯乐要当兵去的志愿，一来二去就消磨没了。越看人家当兵，就越觉得好玩，越好玩自己就越不愿意去当。 结果，他觉得当兵也没有什么稀奇的了，当不当皆可，天天看，不就等于当了吗？真的当了兵，不也就是那种样子吗？所以还是不要当了吧。 不久马伯乐又沉到悲哀里去，似乎又想起王小姐来，也或者不是，不过就只觉得前途渺茫。到江边上去看一看吧，兵们也都变了，似乎都跟他自己一样，好像个个都垂头丧气似的。凑巧又有一大队伤兵让他看见了。那一队伤兵是新从外处运到的，不是重伤，都能够披着军毯走在大街上。自然而然服装都不十分好看，但在马伯乐一看，那就更坏了。 “那不是叫花子吗？那简直是叫花子，卫国的战士变成叫花子了。” 马伯乐看了这一现象，就更悲哀了起来，回到家里，往床上一躺，想起国事家事没有一样得以解决的。 “人生是痛苦的……” “斗争是艰难的……” “有权的好办事。中外古今，天下一理。” “大丈夫手中无钱到处难为人。” “银行的存折，越花越少，家又音信皆无。” 自此以后，马伯乐那快活悠然的态度，又一天一天地减少下去，在他吃起“未必居”包子似乎也没有以前那样得味了。他跟他的儿子大卫说： “你跟着爸爸卖包子去吧，怎么样？ 马伯乐常想，一个人会饿死吗？做点小生意，卖卖香烟，或是掌掌皮鞋，就是卖花生米也是饿不死的，没有钱怕什么！ “大卫，明天爸爸去给你做一只小木箱，你背着。将来没有饭吃的时候，你和爸爸去卖包子。爸爸在家里做，大卫背着到街上去卖。” 马伯乐闲下来没事，就常向大卫说： “咱们这包子专卖给无产阶级，专卖洋车夫，定价不要高，以销路大为本。二分钱一个。烧饼子也是二分一个。难道就专门不买咱的包子吗？和咱做对吗？天下没有此理。若我是洋车夫，一样的价钱，我也是吃包子而不吃烧饼的。眼看着包子好吃嘛，里边多少得有点肉。” 马伯乐有时当朋友讲着，有时当太太讲着，也有时候就自己在想，而每每想到那包子在洋车夫们面前一哄而尽了的情景，就像看了电影似的狂叫起来： “别人的生意，都让我给挤散啦。” 马伯乐有时把大卫叫过来，当面让大卫演习一番。大卫就在地上抓起一只小木凳，腿朝天，用皮带拴在身上，嘴里唱着： “包子热来，包子香，吃了包子上战场。包子热来，包子香，吃了包子打东洋。叮叮当，叮叮当。” 马伯乐想，这孩子倒也聪明，就命令他再唱一套以洋车夫为对象的，看看怎样。大卫唱着： “洋车夫来，洋车夫，吃了包子会跑路。洋车夫来，洋车夫，吃了包子不糊涂，叮叮哆，叮叮哆。” 大卫背着腿朝天的木凳，装做卖包子的形状在地上跑来跑去。 约瑟看他哥哥跑得怪有趣的，上来就夺挂在大卫身上的木凳，他说他也要跟着爸爸卖包子。 大卫正唱的起劲，不肯给他。约瑟抬腿就踢了大卫的膝盖，伸拳就打了大卫的肚子。大卫含着眼泪，只得让给他。 不一会工夫，约瑟卖包子就卖到楼下去了。到了楼下就把别人家孩子的眼睛打出血了。 马伯乐太太从窗子往下一看，约瑟还在拿着木凳乱抡呢。