Chapter 17 Verse 17: Are his words good? (1)

Verse 17: Are his words good? (1) 3. Are their words good? I stayed in Qingdao for a few days, and only once was alone with my sister, and she said a lot of heartfelt things to me. "Oh, little sister, I know that my illness will never get better. I just feel sorry for my mother who raised me for nothing. She gave me the money she worked so hard to save for me to study until I graduated from college, but now it ends up like this." "Sister!" I heard her sad, so I wanted to comfort her a few words, but what's the use of a few general words of comfort?She has been sick for a long time, thinking about everything about herself all the time, and has read all kinds of medicines related to supplements and supplements in detail. Her medical knowledge—especially the part about lung disease—is really rich. amazing.Once I saw the news on a poster in Shanghai that a large number of "special medicines for lung diseases" would be shipped from the United States. I was so excited that I hurriedly wrote to her to tell her, as if the sclerotia could be wiped out as soon as the medicine arrived. Unexpectedly, she smiled lightly after reading the letter, and said to the national security: "The so-called special drug for lung disease is called Stromexin. There have been such advertisements in American magazines, but they didn't say it was special effect or anything. Yes, it’s just that this medicine can help lung diseases.” At that time, the national security guards were disappointed, so they asked: “Then is there any medicine that is absolutely effective?” The sister smiled bitterly: “Until now, Actually, not yet. I just hate that the scientists in the world are so useless.” Guobao asked: “But can we find some more beneficial—at least non-destructive—medicines to try first?” The sister He replied: "As far as I know, there are more than one hundred kinds of beneficial drugs, and there are countless non-destructive ones. Where can I try them all?" In short, she has always known her illness very clearly. , I have nothing to say about it.

Seeing that I called "Sister Wan" and stopped talking, she probably knew that I had nothing to say, so she said to herself: "Xiaomei, I don't know if there is a ghost after a person dies? I used to I am a non-ghost believer, but now I wish I could be a ghost. I can go to City A to see your mother and your child, go to Shanghai to see you, or return to Qingdao to see Secai and the others. A family. If someone dies and has nothing, it's really... so heavenly." She coughed again as she spoke. I said bitterly, "You probably won't..." She smiled bitterly and said, "Why not? I know I will, it's just a matter of time. I've lived to be in my thirties, so it's not too short-lived, but I hate my life for being too monotonous. When I went to university, for the entire sixteen years, I only knew how to study hard, save money desperately, and was reluctant to spend anything on food and clothing. I saved money to buy some books. But today, the doctor forbids me, forbids me to What about reading those nerve-wracking books? I can only read newspapers every day, and I even memorize all the pictures and words in the advertisements. It’s really boring. In fact, I just remember more words and pictures in other books. What's the point? It's all over now anyway, and all my hard work has been wasted."

I said regretfully, "Sister, you are really too kind and you work too hard, which damages your mental and physical strength. If you were willing to be sloppy in reading and teaching sloppy now, you will not That's not the case any more." She replied: "It's a pity that I didn't want to think that way before. When I was studying, because I was using the money my mother had saved so hard, how could I not have the heart to study hard? So I worked hard. , Mu also worked hard, but as a result, my back was bent, and my eyes became short-sighted. Finally, the emperor paid off. When I graduated from university, I got the first place in the exam. The professor of my alma mater earnestly kept me as a teaching assistant in the school. In the university Being a teaching assistant is an embarrassing thing, like a young lady who is used to being an aunt suddenly goes to be an aunt for someone else, but I still agreed, because it is more convenient to stay in the school and do research work, and in the future There are also many opportunities to study abroad. Xiaomei, do you know that for the past ten years, I have always dreamed of studying abroad. During the Anti-Japanese War, I moved to the mainland with the school. Some of my salaries were saved, and I entrusted someone to exchange them into US dollars, so that I could subsidize the expenses when I had the opportunity to go abroad in the future, and I also left a part for my mother. Who knew that all hopes were in vain, and my body was suffering from insufficient nutrition. Under the circumstances, it got worse day by day, and at the same time, I couldn’t recuperate early. I just dragged my illness to go to class. I also seemed to be suspicious, and asked me why I was so thin. I only replied that my family was born so thin, and it didn’t matter. Sometimes I felt my throat was so itchy, so I tried my best to hold it back, and I didn’t want to cough. When I really couldn't help it, I had to explain to people that I had a cold recently, and they smiled coldly at me, how embarrassing, this kind of malicious, suspicious, uncomfortable smile! Xiao Sister, it’s not that I don’t have common sense of hygiene, and it’s not that I don’t pay attention to public health. I also know that if my germs are transmitted to others, it will be harmful to others but not beneficial to myself. But what should I do? Should I enter a nursing home? I have no money. It is impossible to even ask for leave from the school, because I teach for one day and eat for one day. Not to mention such a small teaching assistant position, there are many people scheming. If I say that I am sick, they will They would force me to rest and recuperate. At that time, I would not be able to keep my job. So I had no choice but to pretend nothing had happened until the first time the blood spurted out, and then I had to be more sensible and quit the food group halfway. So in the future I am even more busy with work, and besides teaching in class, I have to cook on the kerosene stove by myself. When I am not in the mood or have the energy to do it, I buy some randomly outside to eat... The love is getting deeper every day, and the grades of others are worse than mine. One by one got the opportunity to study abroad, and soon came back with a degree from abroad. Some of them became professors, and some even became department heads. Only I was a teaching assistant for seven or eight years because of my poor health. I was promoted to a lecturer after being transferred to S University, but...but now I have to resign. Didn’t you just say that I work too hard? In fact, a poor and helpless female teacher like us, if I don’t If you work hard, who is willing to take you in? In the past few years, people have treated me well, but I always feel uneasy in my heart. My illness..."