Chapter 2 Section 2: Preface 1 I see Su Qing (2)

Section 2: Preface 1 I see Su Qing (2) The people I write about, I can forgive and sometimes love for anything wrong with them, just because they exist and they are real.But when I meet them in my daily life, because of my immaturity and incompetence, I know that I can't get any good from mixing with them.If there must be contact, it is also a contest, there is no tolerance, and there must always be a clear distinction between grievances and resentments.But like Su Qing, even if she offends me somewhere, I won't hold grudges. — not because she is a woman.In the request letter she wrote to me at the beginning, she said "talking about the same sex" as soon as she came, and I always laughed when I read it. ——It's not because she is bold and generous, unlike a woman.First, I don't like masculine women, and Su Qing is not a masculine woman at all.She has all the weaknesses of a woman. She cries easily, is supercilious, and is often unreasonable.For example, in the dialogue meeting two days ago, at the beginning.She made an opinion piece on women's careers. The person from "Magazine" raised a question and said, "But" she pondered for a while, her face slowly turned red, and suddenly she became a little angry, and said, "I'm not talking to you—I want you to refute it." What do I do?" Everyone laughed, and she laughed too, which I thought was very cute.

Even in her writing, she has no superhuman rationality.Her rationality was nothing more than common sense—though common sense was a rare thing, too.Between her and her husband, she might have been angry at the beginning, but when they got to the divorce, they were calm and saw the matter very clearly and simply.Her husband was not bad, but he was just a young master.If they can be the young master and young mistress at home for the rest of their lives, their relationship can be maintained.However, the collapse of the social system behind him exposed his irresponsibility.He couldn't support his family, and his pride limited her professional development.And Su Qing's temper is like this, even if he compromises, he can't handle it well.Only separate.This reminds me of myself. Before running away from my father’s house, my mother secretly sent me a message: “Think about it carefully. With my father, of course you are rich. If you follow me, you don’t have any money. You have to eat I have endured this suffering, and I have never regretted it.” Although I was imprisoned at the time and longed for freedom, this kind of problem still made me suffer for a long time.Later, I thought, at home, even though all I see is money coming in and out, it is not mine, and it may not be my turn in the future, and the most difficult last few years of schooling have been delayed.Thinking about it this way, I immediately decided.There was nothing impassioned about such an exodus.Our age is not romantic.

Living in the present, it is really difficult to continue to live and live to your heart's content, just like "split the road of life and death with both hands", so people of our generation can understand more about material life and life itself. It is also appropriate to be with Aiyue.For me, Su Qing symbolizes material life. I want a Chinese-style room in the future, with snow-white powder walls, gold-lacquered tables and chairs, red chair cushions, tea bowls with beans, green glutinous rice, and piles of cakes piled up high, each with dots on top. Last rouge point.There is a so-called "one bright and two dark" in Chinese houses, which of course is the bright room.There is a bit of Su Qing's air here.

This article was originally about Su Qing, but I said a lot about myself. I am really sorry, but there are many things that need to be explained, and I can only explain from myself.When it comes to material things, it seems inseparable from luxury enjoyment.But I feel that stimulating pleasure is like filling a bathtub with water shallowly. Sitting in it, the heat rises, and you can also get a faint pleasure, but it is shallow in the end, and even if you lie down, you can't submerge your whole body.People with complicated thinking, no matter how absurd they are, can hardly find total indulgence.Maybe I don't know enough to think so.

My first impression of sensual dogs and horses is that once when I was a child, I stayed at my aunt's house. She had a banquet at night and went out, leaving me alone in the apartment. The Yiyuan dog run across the door, red lights and green lights, countless Bit by bit, in the dark night, the barking of dogs seemed to be boiling, which made people feel confused.A car passed by on the street, its bright headlights shone into the window of the building, and the shadows of the furniture in the dark room danced all over the room and flew straight to the roof. Forgot about this section in a long time.There was a relatively tense air raid some time ago, and our economic strength was not enough to flee (because fleeing is not a temporary thing, but it will be delayed for a long time in a place with nothing to do), the bombing is resigned to fate, but in case of a long-term When the water was cut off, he had to try to leave the city.I suddenly remembered the prosperity of the traffic lights and the barking of dogs in the clouds.I was sitting alone in the dark room again, without electricity, a white candle was lit in the magnetic cylinder, and a green little cloud dragon protruded from the yellow magnetic cylinder, silently holding the round light and not spitting out.The whole of Shanghai was dead silent, only the ticking of a clock in the room was heard.The candle is placed on a glass plate on the top of the hot water, and the hot water pipe is vaguely seen falling down. A small arrow on the falling point points to "on" and another small arrow points to "off", as if in a lifetime.Today's tabloid was delivered as usual, and when I hold it in my hand, I feel a strange feeling of kindness and sadness.By candlelight, I read with great difficulty, what is what weng, speaking witty words in our familiar tone, about big cakes, white newspapers, nouveau riche, lamenting and recalling the golden age when three yuan was called a poor man.All of this was not owned by me at this time, but it was still sad to see it destroyed—for the thousands of people in the city, there is nothing else!