Chapter 22 twenty two

twenty two The years are like water, and in a blink of an eye, it is the year of indifference.I feel depressed because nothing goes my way.And it seems to me that everyone is playing nice with me. The lines are pretending to be pretty. Every morning before going to work, I must yell in the corridor: "Glantoe, don't set the house on fire! Take your medicine on time!" When I came back, I yelled downstairs again: "Big glans! Come and pick me up, and see how many things I took!" Mr. Li also pretended to be pretty, pushed open the door and rushed down.This is simply a show for people to watch.If I hadn't been friends with them, I would have pushed the door open and given them a big embarrassment: Professor Li, Mrs. Li: You two are ninety years old together, and you are still playing house in the corridor.

Mushy or not? Lines and I have a very deep friendship.When I was in the second year of junior high school, in summer, I often went swimming with Xianxian to Yuyuantan.At that time she was surprised and said: Wang Er, what's wrong with you?There's a rolling pin hidden in the pants, isn't it annoying? I said: You not only, because you don't study.I have a good book called, I will lend it to you when I go back.I clipped notes in important places.You only need to read the two articles "Send the Devil to Hell" and "Put on a Ponytail". She said, the more I listen to these words, the more I don’t understand them. It’s best to find a place where no one is around and take them off for me to see.So I found a place where no one was around, and took it off for her to see.Seeing the line, he said in surprise:

Wang Er, you are sick!The penis is swollen like this, go to the hospital to have a look! Of course, I didn't go to the hospital.Lend her the book tonight.When Lin Xing returned the book, he said with a flushed face: Wang Er, you are going to give that devil to me right now, right? how?you object? Not against it.I mean, if it's going to be given to me, I'll have to wait until I'm older.If you insist on giving it to me now, I might die! Ever since I showed the little monk to her, her grades in lines plummeted, and she failed to pass any of Chinese, English, mathematics, physics and chemistry.Because I told other girls about ponytails, the teacher found out about it, and the comments on her behavior were also extremely bad.If I hadn't given her a cheat sheet.She's already screwed.This line turned out to be a very clever girl, and the primary school teacher predicted that she would become Mrs. Curie.They didn't expect that Mrs. Curie almost couldn't even pass the high school entrance examination.

Xian Xian said that when she was in the second and third grades of junior high school, she was haunted by a nightmare, so she even failed the music exam.At that time, she felt that there was no way out but marrying Wang Er, but Wang Er's big gun... After waking up from the nightmare, her throat was itchy. Now I'm chatting with the line, and she's not happy when I mention this matter.Said: "Wang Er, you are not too young, and you keep mentioning this matter!"I'm not afraid of your displeasure, your gun is nothing compared to my husband's. It immediately occurred to me that women just can't be friends.Not to mention how many cheat sheets I gave her when I was young, and how many times I cheated in exams, but I just said that when I jumped in the queue in the suburbs of Beijing, I suddenly received a telegram: "I need money, lines", so I took my Omega watch I sold it for 200 yuan and sent it to her.

I can repair watches myself and know the value of watches.That omega looked old, but it was loaded.All the parts are plated with gold, looking through the mirror, the eyes are full of yellow.All diamonds are natural, not one man-made.Later, when I came to the United States, my neighbor was an old man who repaired watches and knew how to use mechanical watches. I told him that I had such a watch, and he said, "If you really have one, bring it to me. It's 510,000."If not, don't try to whet my appetite.I have high blood pressure and can't stand stimulation.In addition to being the crystallization of mechanical craftsmanship and a top-grade collection, that watch is also a souvenir from my father.My mother knew people from UNRWA, so there was no shortage of food at home.This watch was exchanged by my father with a bag of foreign noodles.In normal times, he would not be able to afford such a watch.I sold this watch just because of the line, and I have never regretted it for 20 years, until she said I was straw!

I told Xianxian that I would never make friends again in this life, so as not to be sad.The lines just say: As for it?Alright, alright, I take back my words about straw.But you are too tired.How close my husband is to you, and Xiao Zhuanling and I are good friends.What are you forcing me to do?Isn't the small turntable nice? Mr. Li and I have a good friendship, and I don't want to throw the bell, I know all about it.But I just want to hug her, shouldn't she let me hug her.So I said she was pretending to be pretty. Little Zhuanling also pretended to be pretty with me.Every time I want to have sex with her, she takes a medium condom and puts it on me.Because of this, my little monk's mouth and eyes were crooked, and his face was completely changed, like a robber in a movie who put on silk trousers on his face to rob.So I responded to the posters of those wild medicines: "(dictatorship) is not firm, firm but not long!" This is also very easy to understand.If a 1.9 meter astronaut is put into a 1.6 meter spacesuit, he will quickly collapse.For this reason, I negotiated with Xiaozhuanling:

"Suzuko, this suit is too small." "There's no way. There's only this kind of number in the pharmacy in the whole city." This pharmaceutical company is also pretending to be good.People of our age can memorize these two poems: "In a peaceful world, the whole world is the same cool and hot."I know that the Family Planning Commission distributes contraceptives in all sizes.Little Bell said: "Wang Er, let's settle down. Do you know that I'm divorced and a single woman?" In fact, if you really want it, you can come.But Xiao Zhuanling said: Her unit is about to evaluate her job title.If people knew she was sleeping with a 37mm guy, it would affect her promotion to associate editor.For the sake of the deputy editor's review, you put a medium size on the man, isn't it pretending to be pretty?

In fact, I can also ask for it myself. Our unit is also evaluating job titles, and I am also a divorced single man.I went to ask for a 37mm condom, which would definitely affect my promotion to associate professor.So I also have to pretend to be pretty, Even my mother is pretending to be pretty.I asked her to engage in some special accounts, and she said: Wang Er, I am widowed, and I am also a single woman! I said: Mom, you are almost seventy years old, who would suspect you.Besides, your professor has already got it, so what are you afraid of? I am embarrassed to say that I want it for my son, so I said that I want it to go home and blow it up as a balloon.

"Bah! To tell you the truth, if you want to come, you just don't want to. You still owe me a grandson!" My life is like this, when I'm forty, I still have to pretend to be pretty.I’m like my little monk, who was put into a medium size, and my head couldn’t straighten out. When I was young, I had three twists in my hair. Two of them were thanked.Thanks to those two Xuan'er for the courage of the past.Anyway, there are not many days to go, so I will just make do with it like everyone else. I now teach mathematical analysis to undergraduates.In the past few years, it took less than one second to answer integral questions, but now it takes five minutes to respond. I often make mistakes in class, and I don’t understand what I said. I also know that some students are laughing at me behind my back.An arrogant graduate student said to me in person: I heard that you are a software machine, but I don’t think you look like it.

I replied: machines?Is there any hair shedding on the top of the machine? Another crazier graduate student said to me: Teacher, I think your speech is repetitive. I said: is it?After a record is used for a long time, the needle will run out. Another female graduate student said to me: Teacher, I heard that you are the famous Wang Tiezui, and your reputation is well-deserved. I like to hear that.But she said behind her back: This guy must be a good guy when he gets old, and he's so annoying. What my mother told me was: people are the saddest when they are forty.At that time, my mind was very clear and I could realize that I was getting old.From then on, I will be confused, not knowing that old age is coming.

Schopenhauer said: People pass slowly before the age of forty, and pass quickly after the age of forty. What Confucius said is: Don't be confused at forty, know the destiny at fifty, listen to your ears at sixty, follow your heart's desire and not exceed the rules at seventy.It seems that the more you live, the more vigorous you are, which is wonderful!But what will happen after not breaking the rules?So I'm afraid he's being foolishly happy. Except for what others said about me and being forty years old, I found that I couldn’t find anything; I just read a book, appreciated it, and recommended it to others, but after a few days, I suddenly found that I couldn’t remember a single word of the content. up.In the past, I was famous for being able to see ten lines at a glance and never forget.This is a good thing for me: in the past, only one book was not enough to read, but now I have the joy of endless reading.Because of the above, in this forty-year-old year, I was in constant panic, lost interest in everything, and thought all day long about having an extramarital affair with Xian.More specifically, I wanted to have sex with her, and of course, I didn't want to do too much.My physical condition is like this: one round is more than enough, and the second time is barely.So doing it once or twice is enough. I talked about this matter with Xingxian in the cafe run by the students of the mining school, and I got emotional and yelled twice while talking.Once it was about straw sticks, and another time it was about Mr. Li and Xiao Zhuanling.I said what do they know?Xiaozhuanling loves me, Mr. Li loves you, and will definitely forgive us.Thinking of you now makes me straight.So one thing is for sure: If you don't do it now, you will regret it when you can't get up straight.As evidenced by Heine's elegy: In my memory, There is a violet that shines brightly. This frivolous girl!I didn't get my hands on it! ! Damn, I don't regret it! ! Among the poems I have read, this section is the worst.The lines say: Here are my students, standing behind the bar.If you must yell, let's go outside. Lines and I walked out of the cafe and strolled outside.The sky is full of stars outside.I immediately remembered that twenty-three years ago, also in the middle of summer, Xingxian and I climbed to the top of the laboratory building in the middle of the night, and seeing the stars in the sky, I couldn't help saying wildly: If one hundred Wang Er and one hundred Xianxian join forces, Sure to shock the world! To this day, I still don't think it's crazy.The gathering of two hundred identical strange things together is a miracle in thermodynamics. It is not surprising that it shocked the world, but it would be wrong not to shock the world.For example, if 200 singers join hands in a charity performance, it will definitely shock the world.One hundred left one-eyed and one hundred right one-eyed appear at the same time, and it will also shock the world.One hundred seventeen-year-old Wang Er and one hundred seventeen-year-old lines together, that is two hundred male and female desperadoes, is the world in peace? ! That night on the roof of the laboratory building, besides uttering wild words, I did something else, and gained a preliminary understanding of women's underwear.I put my hand under her blouse and unhooked the bra on the back, and then the thing was like a breastplate, hanging loosely between the coat and the skin, and then I reached into her chest like a light ride Entering the battle is very convenient.I found that a woman's breasts are cooler than the rest of the body and feel like two small apples.In addition, I also said some crazy things: We are born in this era of desperation, how happy we are as two desperadoes!We should really do something together! That night I said: If you want to make a career in this world, you must (be) an outlaw.For example, Bruno, who advocated the heliocentric theory when the religious court was raging, just didn't want to live.He was burned to death.As a man, it is not surprising that he was burned to death, but he also endured countless tortures, which is really admirable.The Holy See said that as long as you admit that you have been tempted by the devil, you can avoid punishment.Beheading, hanging, drinking poison, you can take your pick.Before dying, you can also play as a prostitute, and the Holy See will reimburse you for whoring.But he chose an honorable road of thorns, and was hanged on the torture rack.Two ropes, one for the hands and one for the feet, clucked and stretched him alive. His original height of 1.60 meters was pulled down to 3.78 meters.When he was executed by burning, the executioner picked him up on the pyre with a fork, coiled him into a pile (like a snake——Wang Er's note), and set fire to him.Bruno is such a man!There is also Joan of Arc, after being arrested, as long as she admits that she is complicit with the devil, she can be hanged and then burned.But she refused to admit it and chose to be burned alive.The tender skin of a young girl is the most difficult to burn.According to historical records, on that day Joan of Arc was dressed in obscene clothes and a straw rope around her waist. She was led to the stake and tied with iron chains around her waist.At this time, she found that there was a layer of pitch pine needles on the woodpile.This kind of practice is very immoral.Seeing this, Joan only frowned slightly, and said to the executioner: May God forgive you.What a fine woman this Joan of Arc is!When the fire is lit, the flames on the pine needles rush up, and the hair, eyebrows and clothes are burnt.It also burned a whole body of smoldering paste!Burn a pretty girl like a toad, and endure a slow fire.They put a mirror opposite her to let her watch her foaming.I saw the bubbles roasted until they burst one by one, and the slurry splashed, while Joan of Arc clasped her hands together in the flames, and only chanted the name of the Virgin until it was roasted like a Beijing roast duck, and even cursed at a single swear word.Roasted into a mold of roast duck, she became hot, and the name of the Virgin Mary could not be pronounced.Joan of Arc is greater than Bruno in my opinion.Because Wang Er can be Bruno, but not Joan of Arc.I'm going to be roasted anxiously, and I must scold and fuck your mother.If the saintess scolds those words, everything will be over. I said to the line: God will favor us and arrange a torture for us. At that time, you and I must hold on, like a good man and a good woman! The lines said: She wanted to go to the bathroom for five minutes before the torture, and she would urinate frequently when she saw bloody scenes. Twenty-three years later, Lines said to me: Now is the time: we can do something together.What is before us is a torture.I would go bald, lose my libido, have presbyopia, stomach ache, swollen prostate and stop peeing, leg pain, low back pain that had plagued me all my life and become paraplegic, hunched over, lose weight, lose my mind, and die.And she would have sagging breasts, stop menstruating, and suffer from lust due to vaginal atrophy.The face is wrinkled, the hair falls out, becomes ugly, and gradually dies of exhaustion.This is the punishment of aging arranged by God, and this is also the only chance in your life, stand up and prove that you are a good person! What the lines suggest is: when old age comes, do something worth doing, just as Bruno advocated the heliocentric theory and Joan of Arc defended Orléans.We must not flinch in the face of future pain, and persevere until the moment of loss of consciousness: just as Bruno was still insisting on the heliocentric theory before being pulled into noodles, and Joan of Arc was chanting the name of the Virgin before being roasted.We do this not for anything else, just to prove that we are good! What the lines suggest is quite worth doing.At least I haven't thought of anything more worthwhile than this.She also said that she chose me to do this, not because I have the ability and qualifications to do it, but because we were companions when we were teenagers, and we once swore to join hands to prove that we are heroes (male) heroes (girls) ! The lines say that although Wang Er looked like a good man when he was young, but when he was forty years old, he only wanted to be safe and happy, not like a good man.Besides, he hasn't passed any tests, so it can't prove that he is a hero.But Wang Er said: He was on a mission to fight and was beaten back.He stole slop with Mr. Liu Er (stealing swill takes more courage than stealing a car—three two notes), so why isn’t he considered a hero?If Wang Er is not a hero, what can the lines prove that she is a hero (girl)? The lines say: She's in love with balanohematoma.That alone proves that she's a good bitch.If you need details, here it is: She once lay naked on a brick altar in the cold and fear in a ruined temple somewhere in Anyang, Henan Province, spread her legs as hard as she could, and dedicated her virginity to Mr. Li without any guarantees.She also decided to devote all her life to loving the glans penis, and Mr. Lee was as unlovable as any man.That alone was enough for her to pass the test. These nonsense about lines are nothing but preposterous words and are not worth discussing in depth.But these statements can explain why she went to Henan to follow Mr. Li.She said that she walked the glorious thorny road to the present in her own way (see Andersen's "Glorious Thorny Road" - Wang Er's note).Now she also provides the opportunity for us to join forces for glory.This honor is to write down our homecoming and pass it on to future generations, no matter how tragic it is, no matter who it offends. I have been doing this, but the lines say that the novels I write only have good things and avoid bad things, not the whole picture of Homecoming, not straight.If you really want to write about Homecoming, you must write about everything, including things that are unbelievable at first glance. If you dare not write such things, it is kitsch.For example, if you don’t dare to write something like this, it’s kitsch: Now houses are being built at the gate of the mine, some places are half built, and some places are digging foundations.As a result, several squares of black soil were dug out.Other places are loess, only those few pieces are black.The young workers couldn't identify it. Some said it was coal, some said it was asphalt, and some said it was carbonized grain stored in cellars.In order to find out what it is, someone even picked a piece and put it in his mouth to taste, but he couldn't taste it after all.We already know this matter: it is neither coal nor grain, but human shit. We have seen something like this in our time in Homecoming: when I was eight years old, during the Great Leap Forward, people planned to grow 100,000 catties of grain in one mu of land, which required a lot of fertilizer.Fresh manure is not fertilizer, but poison, which will burn the crops alive, so they dug a lot of extremely deep pits in the playground, one by one, like wells, poured fresh manure into it.Because there are methane bacteria in the soil, the dung is fermented and bubbling.When I was young, I used to stand by the pit, struck a match and threw it in, and a faint blue flame appeared on the dung surface. When I was young, I thought this faint blue fire was very mysterious.In the dark night, I almost worshiped it, completely forgetting that it came out of shit. Unfortunately, this business of digging pits and dumping dung is unsustainable, because when the dung is fermented, people find it difficult to get it out: scooping is too thick, digging is too thin, and it is difficult to dig from the side of the pit. It's not as easy as falling down.What's more, those pits are unfathomable. If you stumble and fall, there is very little chance of surviving.So those pits, along with the precious shit, are discarded. After a while, the surface of the pit was covered with floating soil, and grass grew, which was level with the ground, and it became a terrible trap.One of my companions stepped on it and was killed.This is one of the things in Homecoming. The line said that this matter is not unusual, and another matter was mentioned when I was in the cadre school.At the same time, local cadres believed that digging pits was too slow to ferment.In order to let the dung mature quickly, they asked every household to cook a pot of dung in their own pots before eating (see Shen Guanbao’s doctoral dissertation of the Department of Sociology of Peking University—Notes to One Wang and Two).Stir with a spoon while cooking, the same as cooking meat.Also sprinkle the firewood ash into the pot, as if adding Zuoke.After cooking, the kitchen smells like this.Some people were so confused that they thought that this kind of thing could be eaten, so they put it into a bowl and ate it. This story is told in lines, and I can tell that the first sentence is true (as evidenced by Dr. Shen’s dissertation——Wang Er’s note), and the last two sentences are nonsense. This kind of romanticism is unacceptable.But the matter of boiling urine is absolutely indispensable, because it is a clue in Homecoming.It shows that there was a time when everyone had to be a fool (the line is called silly cunt——Wang Er's note), and there was no other choice.We were young then, not yet old enough to make choices. And when we grow up, we have two choices: to be a fool or to be a desperado.Our choice is not to be a fool, but to be a desperado. There are too many things to remember about being an outlaw.Many of our companions died.Not worth a fart to die.For example, when I was in Yunnan, some friends crossed the border to join the guerrillas thinking of saving two-thirds of the suffering people in the world, but they were beaten to death.This kind of death is really horrible.think about it: 1. Two-thirds of the suffering people in the world, do you know they are Huai? 2. Two-thirds of the suffering people in the world, do you know what they are suffering? 3. As Chairman Mao said, there is neither love nor hatred for no reason in the world.Don't you feel a little gross when you die for them without knowing anything? Among the dead were my friends.Their original intention was to be outlaws, but they turned out to be idiots.Such a story is too tragic, I can't bear to write it.If I asked for a straight pen to write Homecoming, I would have committed the crime of pretense. I know many more tragic things—the greatest tragedy in life, it seems to me, is to be fooled.Is there any end to these tragic stories? The line said: With your ordinary, immature, bald head, do you still want to provide human beings with some wisdom in other aspects?If you write about the origin of the black soil in the mine, others will know it is shit and won’t eat it. Isn’t this a real contribution?Shouldn't you thank God for giving you a little gift of language so that you can write a little truth and not quite a cunt? If you decide to write Homecoming in this way, you will have to worry about whether you have to write it, or you will not be able to write it.This requires a broad and profound historical pen, or many pens.Where can I find such a pen?Where can I find so many people?Even if I find a lot of companions, I must devote myself to writing continuously until I die under old age.In this way, I will have the opportunity to stand upright in front of the punishment of aging given by God, and prove that I am a good person, but I still need some time to make this decision.