1. Big Brother Every morning, Wang Er would count from one to ten in bed.This event has the meaning of deciding the end of the day.If the number is a natural sequence, that is to say, he still has to go to work and must get up immediately.If the counted numbers are of a random nature, he will not go to work and sleep comfortably on the bed.If you are of any age and have worked in the technical department for many years, you may do the same.Because you have encountered this kind of situation in the past: When you arrive at work in the morning, suddenly a colleague does not come.Everyone went to see him after get off work, but he was not at home.I have asked all his relatives and friends, but they don't know where he has gone.In such a case, you, as the big brother in the Ministry, would be on your toes in fear that he would come out of the river with his skull smashed out--which happened from time to time.After a few days, you receive a notice: A certain comrade is sick from overwork, suffers from number blindness, and is recuperating.At this moment, you can only sigh, check off his name from the roster, find someone to testify, smash his cabinet, pry his drawer, take out his technical documents, and distribute his work to everyone; In a few days, he came out, but not out of the river—in short, he appeared on TV, appeared in newspapers, took up leadership positions, and didn't know you when he met.The reason for all this is number blindness.This disease makes you angry and psychologically unbalanced, but you still refuse to patronize you. You hate numerology and are afraid of numerology, so you guess and test what it will look like when it occurs.When I was still divorced, my ex-wife saw me in such a deluded state and said: You are like a girl who is afraid of rape.I think this is a useful revelation, but unfortunately I have never been a girl, so I don't know what kind of situation it is; ask her and she won't tell.She wouldn't even tell me if numerology was like a man, or something like a man.

I lived in Beidaihe in 2010, under a cloud of diesel burning.After the winter sun came out, what I saw was a brown landscape.You don't see this kind of scenery in photos or on TV, because now every lens has a blue filter in front of it.This is stipulated by the superiors.This scenery can only be seen with the naked eye.If one day in the future, the superior stipulates that everyone must wear blue glasses, no one will be able to see such a scenery.The sky will be as blue as it was in the last century.It is very likely that the leaders will make such a regulation, because in this way, the pollution problem that plagues us will no longer exist.On the morning of my forty-eighth birthday, I went to work like I always do.This day, like every day I've lived in my life, is neither particularly good nor particularly bad.I chose this day to start my diary, and it didn't have any particular meaning at first.It was only half a year later when I was sorting out these diaries that I realized that it was the beginning of a series of changes.So I started to keep a diary on this day, I am afraid it is not all accidental.

I also know something about number blindness; it occurs only in men of prime age, and people who suffer from it are in technical jobs.The official explanation for it is: this is an occupational disease caused by overwork, so people with digital blindness can always get good treatment.This is mouthwatering and convincing.Numerology blind people can't read line by line, they can only listen to reports;This is a positive statement.The negative argument is: no one knows whether the officially announced symptoms are true or false.Mathematics is clean and honest, and there has never been a single numer who has corrupted the law (people who do not know how to count cannot be corrupt), and no one has used power for personal gain, and everyone is convinced.This is also a positive statement.The negative argument is that they don't need to be corrupt and pervert the law, they just need to get a lot of the leadership's share.The positive statement is that the salary of the leadership does not exceed the needs of the job, and the negative statement is that it exceeds hundreds of times; so it should be settled.For this there must be a counting method, a bookkeeping method, a logic, which is common to the number-blind and the non-number-blind, but it is impossible.A foreign scholar said that counting blindness is essentially non-carrying, as long as it is needed for work, how much you eat, drink and spend will not be carried.We can't learn this algorithm.If you complain about the number blindness on this point, he will comfort you with a smile and say: We don't know the binary and decimal systems you use.Everyone has their own strengths and needs for work.

What I want to explain now is that Beidaihe is an emerging technological city in North China. The reason why it is a technological city is because the Ministry of Technology is located here.Wang Er is the eldest brother of the technical department, that is, the executive deputy director.It was the highest job anyone could hold without being digitally blind, and it was a sort of foreman-like role.Sometimes he calls himself "Wang Er", sometimes he calls himself "I"; but he never calls himself "Big Brother", which is reserved for others. I always see the world from the negative side.When I wake up in the morning, I count and at the same time put my soul into my body.I got up, pushed the motorcycle out of the side room, and drove down the hill into a cloud of smoke and noise.The sound and the black smoke from the diesel engines mounted on the passing vehicles, the black smoke smells like burning health balls, and the noise resonates with your brain.It's a pity that those poets who described hell in the past - such as Dante - have not seen it, so their poems seem to be not imaginative enough.

As long as you're out on the street, the testicles feel this vibration (a solution to this is to wrap the testicles in a styrofoam shell, which is available in stores, but you have trouble urinating after using it), and The black smoke turns your snot into ink (you can also plug your nose with cotton, breathe through your mouth, and have your entire tongue turn black and look like dirty morels).A few years ago, the gas mask I designed could still be used, but later it frightened children to death, so they were not allowed to use it.Of course, if you're in the Nissan sedan you occasionally drive by, it's going to be different.The Japanese have made special designs for vehicles exported to China, with excellent sound insulation and air filters.Of course, the Japanese seldom get rid of blindness, so the prices of these cars have reached astronomical figures, and only the leaders who suffer from number blindness do not think it is expensive.For these reasons, very few people ride in Japanese cars, and most people ride in roaring domestic diesel vehicles.The guys who drove the car also showed the spirit of smashing the cans, and nine out of ten the muffler was removed.Let the smoke sweep the streets, let the noise break the glass.Therefore, passers-by on the street opened umbrellas, and when they saw black smoke approaching, they turned their umbrellas across to block them, and rice-shaped paper strips were pasted on the windows facing the street, as if the city was under an air raid.It's all because someone removed the muffler.If you catch someone and ask him why he did this, he will say that the muffler reduces horsepower and increases fuel consumption, and after installing it, it is still black and noisy, but it is only slightly better, which is not worth it.Of course, you can also say that removing the muffler saves you fuel and disturbs everyone, so it should be installed.He thinks that the muffler is installed, everyone is quiet, but it consumes his oil, so it should be removed.After all, if the muffler saves fuel, no one would bother with it.If it comes to this point, everyone will agree: I don't know which bastard designed this broken machine.Only I disagree, because the bastard is me.All the diesel engines that run on the street and are installed at home, as long as they are black smoke billowing and roaring like thunder, they are designed by me. If they are neither noisy nor black, they are imported, and the price has reached astronomical figures. The specific figures How much is a state secret, we shouldn't know, and those who know these numbers don't know how many are.

2 Everyone who has become a Big Brother has such a special character. Take me for example, sometimes I am me, and sometimes I am Wang Er. He is a 48-year-old man who is in front of him anytime, anywhere.In the latter case, "I" does not know where to go.Xiao Xu doesn't have a motorcycle, so someone has to pick him up to work.Well, Wang Er is right in front of you, so Wang Er will go and pick him up—there is no such thing as "I" at this time.When "I" comes back, I will find that doing so has consumed my gasoline and ruined my car—this kind of small motorcycle is designed to carry 80 kilograms, and Wang Er alone has 80 kilograms.Other than that, he was lying on top of me like a sodomite.Xiao Xu took advantage of you and didn't say hello.This is the harm caused by too strong a sense of responsibility.

Too much responsibility often hurts me a lot. Every time someone in the ministry goes missing, I look everywhere: to the police station, to the hospital, and even to ask the security in a low voice (they are not friendly to layoffs, and the motorcycle is in front of their door Stop for a moment and the tire will deflate).After I couldn't find it anywhere, I sat in the technical department and sighed: If so-and-so can come back, we will have a party to celebrate-I will contribute one hundred dollars.Colleagues said; forget it, big brother, this kid must have suffered from number blindness.But I don't like to hear that.I never believed that someone could be saved from blindness.As a result, he actually suffered from number blindness.Every time this happened, I felt cheated and abandoned. I sat down on the stool and shouted: "Bring me the heart-saving pill!"

In fact, I don't want to be as naive as I appear on the surface.I'm forty-eight, and I know more people who are count blind than I can remember.That said, I know exactly who counts blind - I've seen too many of them.Taking the current example as an example, I can bet that there is a number blind in the technical department, and that is the guy surnamed Xu lying on my back.In the morning, he was carrying a plastic bucket with little or no foundation in it (you must know that there is no drinking water in the class, and if you don’t bring water, you want to drink other people’s); on your head is a World War II pilot’s hat, shaking Standing on the side of the road, dragging two pieces of clear nose, looks like a monkey cheek.Even leaving aside the fact that he's about to count blind, it's not likable enough.I don't know anyone who likes him, man or woman.But he is not counting blind now, he is my man.If he has no money, he can ask me to borrow it, and of course he will not return it afterwards; if he has no water, he can ask me for it, but I don’t have much water.That said, I have to love him because I'm Big Brother.

I came to Beidaihe twenty years ago. There are hills at the east and west ends of the place where there are verdant trees. In the middle is a saddle-shaped area with a beach. On the hillside behind the beach are some villas in the woods—some elegant small houses. house.Now the situation on the beach is like this: there are no trees behind the beach, and the villas are still there, but they are greatly changed.All the doors and windows are gone, and replaced with straw curtains, wooden boards removed from packing boxes, and corrugated boxes, in which there lived construction teams, security guards, and small business vendors. They shipped it home.They built something like a pigsty with bricks in the yard, which was their toilet.Black smoke rose from the chimney, from burning waste tires.The beach was black and polluted with skin oil.The sea is covered with plastic bags, and the water is so white that you can't see it.We own waste tires, waste oil, and plastic bags in large quantities, and they are being sent here continuously from all over the world.In short, the beach becomes a swamp of black smoke and waste oil, a cesspit if the hill is dirty.But Xiao Xu prefers to live here—that is to say, I have to come down to pick him up.If not, I would rather never come up here.Due to my past professional training, I feel bad when I see ugly things.

The house of the technical department is on the edge of Dongshan Mountain, surrounded by corridors on three sides, which shows that the house is old and used to be the summer house of a certain dignitary.A few years ago, I could see the sea from the corridor, but now I can still see it on windy days, and on other days I can only see a patch of black smoke.The corridors were sealed with glass windows, which had been colorless before, but were now tinted.The reason for these changes was, of course, the black smoke from the diesel engines, which was now also chug from the iron chimney on top of the house.But there is no way around this, because this house also needs heating and lighting, and the heating needs the cooling water of the diesel engine to supply the heating, and the lighting needs the diesel engine to drive the generator in the basement.This bang bang bang bang is my work ten years ago, representing my ability at that time.Now I should be able to design a diesel engine, at least like the Thai product, the kind of machine that makes the rustling sound of silkworms eating mulberry leaves; or like the Japanese diesel engine, that kind of machine is silent and does not emit exhaust gas; of course, no one can ask me Design the Swedish diesel engine, the kind of thing you just sit on and don't know if it starts.But should be, actually I'd build this shit--something that works like a tamper and a smoke bomb.Diesel engines are rarely even used in other parts of the world like we are, because there are enough people who are not digitally blind to design, build, and maintain clean, efficient centralized power systems.Although it has been proved that digital illiteracy is not contagious, but no one applied for this kind of person to be invited to China as a technical consultant; because people suspect that it has something to do with the environment.People also say that digital illiteracy is the AIDS of the 21st century. Until the cause is clarified and protective measures are discovered, scientific and technological personnel will never dare to risk their own future. In fact, there are indeed several scientific and technological personnel who have served in China He suffered from number blindness here, and later became a great internationalist fighter, enjoying a lifelong pension from the Chinese government.Since then, some people have dared to take risks, but the governments of various countries have banned scientific and technological personnel from coming to China-scientific and technological personnel are a precious resource.The peace corps members who came were all young religious believers, and their majors were arts and humanities.Even if they take some surprise courses in science and technology before coming to China, they can only be qualified for the job of scientific and technological translation, and all hope lies in the Chinese who do not suffer from number blindness.The men arrived at the house before eight o'clock in the morning and set to work with a sense of purpose.

When Wang Er came to work, he was already the last one.He took out a plastic water tank from the tool box under the seat of the motorcycle, and walked into the house. There was a large tin pot in the small hallway, and a measuring cup was placed beside it. Wang Er measured out from the water tank. One liter of water, poured into the jug, then screw the lid on tightly, and put the water tank on a shelf-more than forty water tanks have died on it, and each water tank has a piece of adhesive plaster with its name written on it.Then he took off his coat, went to the sink, unscrewed the water pipe, and a brown fluid flowed out of it—this kind of thing is called tap water.Wang Er picked up a strip of test paper from the sink and tested it, and found that it was neutral, so he washed his hands in it.Regardless of whether it is neutral or not, no one dares to wash their face in it.So he pulled out a wet toilet paper towel, wiped first his face, then his hands, and walked into the hall.This is a delicate style, in stark contrast to the number-blind style.During the meeting, you can often see the leader pour a plastic cup of mineral water on the rostrum, drink a few sips, throw the rest there, and pour another cup later.When the meeting is over, the table is full of glasses of water.It is called leadership style.Fortunately, this water will not be wasted. Of course we refuse to drink it, and we can't drink it even if we want to.The security guards drank, and they were thirsty too.Water is more than just H2O. Since each person only has five liters of drinking water per day, the boiled water for tea has to be shared among everyone.In this case, of course we want to use the tap water - this water is pumped directly from the river without treatment - even if it is not up to drinking standards, it can be used for bathing.Sometimes it's salty, which doesn't matter, because it's better than sea water anyway, and electrodialysis can even be considered.Sometimes it contains acid, sometimes it contains alkali, which can be neutralized with alkali or acid.Sometimes the water contains a large amount of benzene and waste oil, which can be separated by a centrifuge and used as fuel, and sometimes it contains nothing at all.Sometimes it's red, sometimes it's green, sometimes it's yellow—shit soup comes out of the pipes—depending on what the small factories upstream dump into the river.Sometimes they pour out acid, sometimes alkali, sometimes organic poisons, and sometimes manure.To purify this water, it is necessary to create an omnipotent purification system that can extract drinking water from acids, alkalis, organic poisons and even excrement.This is not an easy task for an engineer with a professional background, not to mention that 40 of the 41 of us are half-way monks.In addition, there are two ways to solve the problem of bathing. One is to go swimming in the sea in summer. After landing, use sand to wipe off the diesel oil stains on the body, and then use a towel dipped in drinking water to wipe it off, because diesel oil stains cannot be wiped off. It is very clean, so it looks like a sika deer after washing; another way is to use distilled water to bathe in winter-we have equipment to make distilled water by using the waste heat of the oil machine.Although distilled water is colorless and transparent, it is not clean.You must have a good nose when you take this kind of bath, and don’t make a fuss if you smell gasoline;If you smell the smell of benzene, you should run away from the nozzle without hesitation, avoid all the hot steam, and flee naked into the cold wind.Benzene poisoning is a disease for which there is no cure. Before death, it will swell into a large blister, translucent like a jellyfish in the sea.Colleagues said that bathing should be done according to one's ability and measures should be taken.Those who run slowly should have a gas mask at hand, and girls should wear a three-point style, but Big Brother and the sick are not allowed to wash it.They firmly dissuaded me from taking a bath in winter, and although I said to myself that my old man will die in 48 out of 10 years, they still didn't let me fight between cleanliness and pneumonia, and said, now we need you, when you get the number Blindness, we don't care what to do.So I had to bear it dirty. I am still designing the water purifier, and it takes seven or eight hours to think about it, which makes my brain ache.One possibility is that I have finally built a water purifier that is so ingenious that I can get unlimited clean water from now on, which is of course wonderful.But I also know there is no end in sight.Another possibility is that I died without making such a water purifier. After I die, I no longer need water, and the problem is solved; but it is also far away.The best possibility is that I get numerology and never have a water problem. 3 Wang Er sat on the high stool in front of the drawing table, sharpening a pencil with a flying fish-shaped knife in his hand.The knife weighed a pound, and it was a handicraft. In addition to sharpening pencils, it could also be used to peel apples, chop vegetables, and kill people.Every knife nowadays is so bulky. This is because every knife is made of cast iron. Although it is high-quality ductile iron, it cannot be made light and light like steel.When he was thinking about the diesel engine on the drawing board, he also thought about ductile iron, and imported steel, which was as precious as gold, could not be considered unless it was a last resort.In addition, steel is a dangerous product that requires special approval, and the report cannot be approved for a year.In this case, of course, one can only be forgiven for designing something clunky and inefficient.It's just that his design was more clumsy than reasonably clumsy, more inefficient than reasonably inefficient, and that was unforgivable.He can only use his imagination in another field; making diesel engines into ingenious shapes, some like tigers, some like carp, some like nothing, but still look pleasing to the eye.No matter how it is made, the clumsiness and inefficiency cannot be changed, and such weird things cannot be mass-produced at all. Only three or five units of each kind can be made, and then they are bought by art galleries all over the world. Ning's ebony carvings and Nepal's hand-woven carpets are displayed together.Now all art dealers in the world know that there is a "Wang Two" in China, but they don't know that he is an engineer. They only know that he is a sculptor who combines post-industrial society and national art.In this way, his design has earned some foreign exchange for the country, but he does not know how much.This is a state secret. One thing we have not mentioned is that Wang Er and most of his colleagues in the technical department, Yixiang, although they are doing technical work now, their lives did not start in the engineering school.Wang Er himself graduated from the Academy of Arts and Crafts, and his colleagues come from the Academy of Music, Academy of Fine Arts, Department of Chinese, Department of Philosophy, Opera House, etc.; it is a hodgepodge of arts and humanities, but this mishmash is consistent on this point De: In everyone's file, there is a "two-year speed school" item in the last academic record.That's because as digital blindness spreads, all those who don't suffer from it are obliged to change careers, go to "crash school" to crash technical subjects, and then move on to new jobs.There is also a strange phenomenon, that is, the former engineers suffer from number blindness very quickly, but the engineers who change jobs are more durable.They're the tech elite, although if it weren't for the fact that they were numeropia, they wouldn't be elite, they'd just be duds.As far as I am concerned, I have talked to the leader many times, explaining the fact that I vomited blood from the math teacher in the speed school.After listening to it, the leaders only gave this instruction: Strengthen business learning—low level is a good thing, and there is still room for improvement, so we are not afraid of low level.I said I was almost fifty and I couldn't improve.He said fifty is very young.I asked how old I was, and he said twenty, and held out three fingers at the same time, which almost drove me to death.It doesn't work with number-blind reasoning.By the way, it is true that the math teacher vomited blood, but he had stage three tuberculosis; and it was not out of anger, but in laughter.When he couldn't speak in class, he asked everyone to tell stories.I told a dirty joke and he vomited blood and died afterwards. In addition to some crappy people sitting in this technical department, there are some even crappier ones in the steel plant who direct the smelting of ductile iron, and others who direct the smelting of low-quality diesel in the oil refinery. no.In any case, Wang Er was considered to be the best among this group of people.He finished sharpening the pencil, and suddenly there was a trumpet sound in the hall, and a powerful voice that overwhelmed Carloso led the singing: "Happy birthday to you!" He straightened his neck amidst the laughter, wanting to see this Who is the birthday star.But a handful of paper flowers fell on his head.This birthday old man turned out to be himself.Then he accepted other people's birthday congratulations, including kisses from two female interns, and announced that when you get married, each of you will give a sweater.This is because they were each wearing a sweater at the time—a blue sweater and a red sweater, both machine-woven sweaters, of course, which looked like felt pieces and would not fit on a pretty girl.And Wang Er's hand-knitted sweaters are all handicrafts, which are better than knives.These sweaters take a bit of imagination to see that they are sweaters, and more imagination to see how to wear them.But it always looks good when you wear it.But these two kisses caused trouble - two notes appeared in his coat pocket.It must have been stuffed in by them, but who stuffed it is a question.There is a rule that prohibits the transfer of people who are not digitally blind from technical jobs, which means that there is a real shortage of people in the technical department.There is also a rule that women are not included.That is to say, the leading organs also need people who are not blind to serve as secretaries.There is another one that is not the least important, that is, the secretary must be pleasing to the eye, not like Wang Er.Therefore, the best way out for girls is to be admitted to the engineering college at the age of eighteen (the engineering college has very high test scores and does not recruit boys), graduate at the age of twenty-two, do an internship in the technical department for a year, and then work as a secretary in the higher-level department .Soon after that, she became the head's wife.This is an iron rule, even people who are not children, as long as they are beautiful.For this reason, the engineering college picks and chooses good looks, and it is almost impossible to recruit students.Now I heard that the conditions have been relaxed, but I have to sign a contract and promise to accept plastic surgery.I think boys who are willing to transgender may be accepted in the future.Of course, this kind of stuff, like us who have changed careers as artists, is second-class. Regarding the artist's change of career, I can add a few words. After we changed our career, the original positions were taken by comrades who were blind.So now there are almost no novels that can be read, poems that can be read, or paintings that can be seen; there is no piece of music that is not out of tune, if it was originally in tune.At the same time, the treatment of artists has also increased to a mouth-watering level.But it's also convincing—you've got to give people something to do.Moreover, art is now regarded as a dangerous job. It educates the people and bears the responsibility of improving everyone's soul. It is an "engineer of the soul".If you ruin someone else's soul, you have to be responsible; this danger is still borne by the numerologist.If everyone becomes a leader, there will be too many leaders to bear. If no one is allowed to be a leader, people will work hard and make great achievements.So let them become super writers and painters, which is still a bad treatment for others. 4 I have an older brother who is in his sixties and lives in the United States now. Around 1970, he worked as an educated youth in the countryside.I was only seven or eight years old at the time, and I also knew that he suffered a lot at that time, because every time he came home, he could eat like a pig.He told me that he didn't need to buy a ticket for the bus, and he showed me a show.Once caught by the conductor, he said: Old is an educated youth!After hearing this, the eldest sister of the conductor said quickly: My younger brother is also an educated youth.Just let him go.He also told me that they were very happy in the countryside, sneaking around all day long and not working, and no one cared about them.This incident taught me that doing wrong is a privilege of the unlucky.We are a lot of unlucky people, so we have this privilege.For example, if I see an empty house, I can just pry open the door and move in, no matter what seal it is on.After a few days, the people from the housing management bureau came to me and asked me to hand over the keys of the original house and go through the formalities of changing the house.But no matter where I moved, the house had no air-conditioning, no clean water supply, no high courtyard walls, and no one guarding the door, so it didn’t matter whether I moved or not.For another example, we can live together with any girl we like without any formalities. If the disciplinary police invites us to talk, it is nothing more than saying: neither of you is married, why don't you go through the marriage formalities?It's just that in a few days, this girl will be transferred to a government agency, and she will divorce us.Then there is Pangshoulder, who is noisy every day.As far as I know, everyone is kind of annoyed by this.But this way of life cannot be changed unless one suffers from number blindness. I literally want to be number blind, mostly because I can't do it at my current job.This morning, Xiao Zhao, who is engaged in electricity, handed me a piece of paper and said, "I'm sorry, big brother, I encountered a problem."I picked it up and saw that it was a partial differential equation.I know that and nothing else.I raised my hand and said; everyone put aside what they were doing, and the meeting started.So we former performers, former tenors, former art editors, photographers, etc., moved stools and formed a circle, facing the differential equations on the blackboard, and each made a grand statement.It would be better if the surname Xu was not there at this time.His presence only adds to our suffering.As I said, almost all the people in our room are scumbags, except this grandson.He has a master's degree in engineering (a degree obtained many years ago). People like this either suffer from number blindness or have gone abroad. This grandson is another exception.He listened to some people's opinions and smiled.Hearing other people's opinions, I laughed out loud.After listening to my opinion, he stood on the chair and covered his belly with his hands, writhing around like a pregnant female monkey.The person sitting next to him tried to drag him out.He struggled desperately and said: Let me listen!So little fun for a month...it makes everyone lose face.The big fat tenor jumped up and sang loudly, and someone blew the trumpet to accompany him.To the accompaniment of the music, someone pinched him—with the professional envy of an artist and a hatred of scumbags.This guy is a bitch, and it's good to be screwed.After the chaos is over, I will announce the adjournment.The partial differential equation is not solved, because the solution cannot be solved, and the approximate algorithm is used instead.This example shows why our design is so crappy - too many approximations are used.And when it comes to approximation algorithms, we're all geniuses.We have invented a whole new set of mathematics, covering the whole field of applied mathematics, published a handbook, first-class binding, first-class illustrations, texts of poems, notes of essayists, but very poor content.Readers of the handbook, colleagues in our lower-level units often send us bullets, saying that if the writing is so far-fetched, they will kill us all.In fact, we are not pretending to be profound, but to cover up the painful feet. Not only mathematics is our pain, but also various mechanics, thermodynamics, chemistry, electrical engineering and so on.In fact, our sore feet include all branches of science.I know that there is a "Genius Scientist" magazine in the United States (this genius is of course in quotation marks), which specifically publishes our inventions, and some traitors and traitors write articles for them and spread our photos to earn dollars. The manuscript fee, including this one surnamed Xu.Because of his efforts, I have been on the center page of the journal twice, on the cover three times, and was elected as the "Genius Mathematician" of the year once.It is said that serious people in science and engineering read that publication, not only laughing, but also sexual, so I often receive English courtship letters and nude photos, there are men and women, some of them are not bad, but most of them are bad; dangerous parts It was all painted over with charcoal.I don't answer a single letter.To some gay mathematician, I'm sexier than a Playboy Playmate.For this reason, I wanted to kill Xiao Xu more than once.But I also understand that even unlucky people can't kill people. I think foreign scientists lack sympathy - if they and engineers are all stupid, and only a few artists are left, I'd like to see what happens to them.If Picasso is alive, Matisse is alive, Gauguin and Monet are alive, I also want to see if they can draw diesel engines better than me.But people like Xiao Xu are the least sympathetic.I once thrust a charcoal into his hand and forced him to draw a picture, even if it was an egg.But he just refused to answer, and said with a smile: I can't, I know myself.This remark is insinuating again, saying that we all have no self-knowledge. Before Mattis decides to revive and return the diesel engine for me, I have one more thing to remind him: he can't get any useful technical information.One thing is very different from before his death: all foreign technical books and periodicals are published in the form of CDs and disks, and such things are prohibited from being imported to prevent reactionary or obscene information from being contained.As for using a computer terminal to check something from abroad, there is no way.This is because all information, especially information from foreign countries, is dangerous.You can make a phone call, but you must speak Chinese, because someone is monitoring and cuts the line when they hear a foreign language.I don't know how well Matisse speaks Chinese. If he can't speak Chinese well, he has to be prepared to be dumb.In addition, any material is a dangerous product: flammable, explosive, hard.The word danger is too broad a word these days.Under these conditions, let Matisse try and see what he can come up with! After the meeting, Xiao Xu said to me: You tie me your Benin woodcarving, and I will solve this problem for you.I said what did your mother force you to think about? It's not that I want to solve this problem.At that time, my face was probably ugly, and he backed away in fright. It took a long time before he dared to come to me and explain: "Big brother, if you want to solve this problem, I will do it right away. I will be your grandson if you want anything!" At this time, I had recovered my big brother's demeanor, and said calmly: I don't want to solve this problem, it's the public who wants to solve this problem.I try my best to figure it out, it is my responsibility, but it is not my problem after all.Xiao Xu said: As long as it is a public question, he will not count it. This is his principle.But he didn't want to offend Big Brother for it.I said: How could I?Sticking to principles is a good thing.To show that I don't hold a grudge against him, I hugged him and kissed him on the cheek, which made me feel a little sick—this guy is a bit of a sissy.But since I am a big brother, I must treat everyone equally. It is necessary to say a few words about the woodcarving.It was given to me by an African classmate when I was in college, and crooked Chinese characters were engraved on the base: Big Brother as a souvenir—we are people of color.It's a keepsake, one, it says I was Big Brother when I went to college, and two, it says a black man thinks I'm black.Generally speaking, we people of the yellow race are always treated as white by blacks, blacks by whites, and misunderstood by our own people.The fact that I can be treated as a black person by a black person speaks volumes about my character.This person surnamed Xu actually wanted to take it away and sell it on the black market.This one action alone means that he is going to suffer from number blindness. 开完了数学讨论会后，我坐到绘图桌前，那个穿红毛衣的实习生搬凳子坐在我身边，假装要帮我削铅笔，削了几下又放下了。说实在的，削铅笔不那么容易，刀子钝笔芯糟，假如她只是心里有话要说，那就是糟蹋东西。那孩子悄声对我说：王老师，我会算这道偏微分题。我也悄声说道：别管我们的事——辅导老师没关照你吗？她说：关照过的，但是我的确会算。我不理她（我还要命哪），她还是不走，这叫我心里一动——于是我压低了声音说：读过？她脸色绯红，低着头不说话。这就是说，读过了。 我们过去都是艺术家，艺术家的品行就是；自己明明很笨，却不肯承认。明明学不会解偏微分方程（我们中间最伟大的天才也只会解几种常微分方程），却总妄想有一天在睡梦中把它解开，然后天不亮就跑到班上来，激动地走来定去，搓手指，把粉笔头碾成粉；好容易等到大家来齐了，才宣布说：亲爱的老大哥，亲爱的同事们，这道题我解出来了！ !然后就在黑板上写出证明，大体上和数学教科书上写的一样，只是在讲解时杂有一些比喻，和譬如“操他妈”之类的语气助词，这能使大家都能理解。有了这些比喻和“操他妈”，证明就属于我们了。讲解者在这种时候十分激动并且能得到极大的快感，有一位天才的指挥家在给大家讲解“拉格朗日极值”时倒下去了，发了心肌梗塞，就此一命呜呼。这种死法人人羡慕。因为这个缘故，我们才不容易得救盲症。也是因为这个缘故，我们不喜欢女人来帮助我们。当然，有些少数丧失了自尊心的人也会这么干，那就是另一个故事了。 关于艺术家不得数盲症的机理，有必要讲得更明确：我们在科技方面十足低能，弄不懂偏微分，所以偏微分才能吸引住我们。假如能弄懂，就会觉得没有意思了。这就是说，我们不能太聪明，并且要保持艺术家的狂傲的性情，才能在世界上坚持住。 另一个故事是这样的：以前我有一位同事，是吹萨克管的，是个美男子。因为在十几岁时玩过一阵子无线电，速校毕业后负责电子工程。此人钻研业务到了走火人魔的程度，发誓不把概率论里的大数定理搞明白死不瞑目。因此他就丧失了自尊心。有一回，我们部里来了个小眼镜，她说能证明大致定理，也不知用了什么手段，居然让美男子听懂了证明。然后他就完全惟小眼镜马首是瞻。听说他们在家里玩一种性游戏：小眼镜穿着黑皮短裙，骑在美男子脖子上。后来她实习期满要调到上级单位时，两人就双双殉情而死——这当然又是小眼镜的主意。刚毕业的女孩子总是对殉情自杀特别感兴趣（她们最爱说的一句话就是——让我们一块死吧！仿佛只剩下电死吊死还是淹死这样一些问题），但是不能听她们的，都死了谁来干活？我就接到过多次同死的邀请，都拒绝了，是这么说的：你能调到上面去很好呀，别为这个内疚；我们大男人，不和女孩子争，等等。讲完了，挨个耳光，事情就过去了。这是因为我从来不请教女人数学问题。假如请教过，知道了她们有多聪明——她们的美丽已经是明摆着的了——多半就没有勇气拒绝死亡邀请。这是活下去的诀窍。 有关这个诀窍，必须再说明一遍，因为它很严重。不能问女人科学问题，因为你已经四十多岁了，做了多年科技工作，不植大致定理、不会解偏微分方程，而且得不了数盲症，又有何面目活着？我们都在危险中，所以就不要让一个二十岁的女孩子告诉你，你不会的她都会。这是因为你是男高音、画家、诗人，她要得到你。活下去的诀窍是，保持愚蠢，又不能知道自己有多蠢。有一句话，我要与大家共勉：好死不如恶活。我的兄弟们，我已经四十八岁了，还有一身病，但还在坚持。 5 今天是星期四，也是我四十八岁的生日。这一天的一切，都有必要好好总结一下。我像往常一样上班去，天像往常一样黄，自来水像往常一样臭，像往常一样，有人遇到了一道数学题，我们开会讨论，并且像往常一样没有解出来。这都是表面现象。实际上，我比往常老了一岁，天比往常更黄了一点，自来水比往常更臭了一点，没有解出的数学题比往常多了一道，一切都比往常更糟糕。我在制止这个恶化的趋势方面竭尽了心力：力图忘掉今天是我生日，力图改进我的柴油机想让它少冒点烟，力图想出一种净水器，力图解出那道数学题，但是全都没有结果。我们技术部里每个人都在力图解决这些问题（只有第一个问题除外），但是都没有结果，因为他们都比我还笨。只有一个人除外。首先，他可以解出那道数学题，其次，他是学化工的，在水处理方面肯定有办法；最后，他是管燃料的，假如能给我纯净一点的燃料，柴油机就可以少冒一点姻。但是他什么都不干，到班上打一晃，看完了我们的洋相后，就溜出去了，而且是借了我的摩托车。我有确实的情报，他是跑到上级那里去打小报告去了——虽然他自己说是去医院看病——此种搞形说明他很快就会发数盲症。我应该不借他车，但是我不能。他说，他要去看病。而且我是老大哥。