Chapter 48 Forty eight

On the day that Master Mei was ready to wear, Juexin went to the Zhejiang Guild Hall to help take care of him in the morning.There's not a lot of work here.But when Juexin saw that desolate scene, and heard the mournful cry of young mistress Mei (she was weeping bitterly on the coffin in the coffin in sackcloth), he felt an inexplicable sadness.Later, Yun talked to him about Mei's young mistress who cried all day long and didn't want to eat or drink, and he thought of the woman's plump cheeks that were full of vitality and lost weight in a short period of time, and he felt even more sad.He has a sympathetic heart, but he can't do anything.He could only help Yun comfort Mei Shaonai for a while.But even he knew that consoling words would be of little use here.They could not bring back Mei Shaonai's young husband, they could not change her life situation, and they could not alleviate her long-term loneliness and pain in the future.The Zhou family is still that Zhou family, and Zhou Botao is still the same Zhou Botao.Nothing will change, except for the future destruction to come.

This realization (or "enlightenment") was a huge blow to Juexin.He was about to climb the peak of destruction.He only saw thicker darkness and greater misery.There is no peace, no prosperity, and no hope for the future.There is only destruction to come.He has been climbing to the top of this mountain step by step over the years.He has gone through hardships, and he thought that by sacrificing himself, he would help others.He believes he will find peace one day.But now he inadvertently poked his head out of the last dream and saw the real scene around him.He suddenly remembered Juemin's rebuke to him: "You have harmed yourself, and you have harmed others!" He couldn't wipe this sentence away, but swallowed it in his stomach, letting it bite his heart.He held back the pain in his heart, he dared not utter a single moan.He now knows his mistake.He has made so many mistakes!One could see the spasm of pain in his face, but did not know what was going on in his heart.

When they were about to leave the guild hall in the evening, the sedan chair was already ready, and they were waiting for Young Nai Mei to change clothes.Still wearing the bulky sackcloth, Maid Mei came out from the coffin and said, "Big cousin, thank you big cousin," and watched Juexin knelt down and kowtowed.Juexin hastily returned the gift.Young Mistress Mei just stood up, and said: "This time, my cousin's affairs are all thanks to my eldest cousin's care, and he will also be grateful to my eldest cousin in Jiuquan." burst into tears. Yun, Sister-in-law Feng and Cuifeng all went over to persuade Mei young mistress.Mei Shaonai was still struggling and crying.Her crying repeatedly felt a new wounded heart.Juexin understood the meaning of this cry better than anyone else.This is the sound of death.He knew that it was not one person who died this time, but two young lives.Mei Shaonai had to die with her husband, which was decided by that strange system.Juexin had never had much doubt about such things before.Now he suddenly remembered the words "cannibalism".

This thought may bring courage to others, but it still brings him pain, and still greater pain.It seemed that he could get nothing but pain in his life. Juexin sent Yun and Mei Shaonai back to Zhou's house.He stayed at Zhou's house for a while, he was afraid of seeing the faces of those people, and he didn't wait to go back with Zhou, so he excused himself and left first. When he returned home, he saw two sedan chairs with arched poles in the hall, with lanterns written with the characters "Luo" and "Wang" hanging behind them.He knew that this was the sedan chair of Luo Jingting and Wang Yunbo.Surprised, he asked Wen De, the servant who was talking loudly to the bearers in the hall, and found out that Keming's illness had turned over again.He was startled, and hurriedly strode inside.

As soon as he walked under Juemin's window, he saw Jueying walking towards him, accompanied by Luo Jingting and Wang Yunbo.The two familiar doctors greeted him with smiles, and he also turned around to send them out.He asked them about Keming's illness (he saw two doctors coming out at the same time, so he guessed that Keming's illness was not serious), Luo Jingting frowned and replied: "Uncle Ling's illness is a bit strange this time. He has almost recovered I don't know why it suddenly became fierce again. We can't see the source of the disease for a while, it seems to be caused by panic. I have discussed it with Yun Weng for a long time, and I will prescribe a prescription and try side effects. Whether there are any changes, we will know tomorrow. Brother Mingxuan, please tell your sister-in-law to be careful tonight."

These few words were a big blow to Juexin.A stone weighed heavily on his heart, and he didn't dare to think about the future.After the two doctors got into the sedan chair, he walked in with Jueying.On the way, he asked Jueying about Keming's illness, and only then did he know that Keming was reading in his study two or three hours ago.Ke'an and Keding went in to see him, talked to him for a while, and the three of them argued fiercely.Later Ke'an and Keding left.Keming continued reading alone.Soon he vomited up, and the vomit was full of black blood, and he vomited two large bowls in succession.At that time, he was sweating profusely, and he passed out immediately. It took about four or five minutes for him to wake up again.Mrs. Zhang was very anxious, so she invited two doctors at the same time.The doctor has seen the pulse, but can't determine what the disease is.

Juexin followed Jueying into Keming's bedroom, and saw Keming sleeping drowsily on the bed with half of the curtains hanging down.Mrs. Zhang sat on the sofa in front of the bed.Cuihuan stood in front of the second cabinet opposite.Jueren was sitting on a chair beside the square table, propping his cheek with one hand, leaning against the square table and dozing off lonely.Juexin thought that Keming was asleep, so he tiptoed and walked towards Mrs. Zhang in a calm manner. "I'm asleep now," Zhang whispered, gesturing to Juexin. Before Juexin could answer, Keming suddenly coughed on the bed and called, "Third Wife."

Mrs. Zhang agreed, and hurriedly walked to the bed, bowed her head and asked kindly: "Third Master, you are awake, what's the matter?" Keming opened his eyes and asked feebly, "Who's here?" "The young master is back, he came to see you," Zhang replied. "You called him over, and he came just in time," Keming said with a sudden movement of his head, with a little excitement on his face. Mrs. Zhang turned her head and beckoned Juexin to go to the bed. "Third Dad, are you better?" Juexin asked, looking down at his scorched thin face, feeling like tears were about to flow down his face.

"You are too tired. Your complexion is not good. I think you should also take a breather. Fortunately, you will not go to the company these two days," Keming looked at Juexin with absent-minded eyes. said slowly. "I'm not tired," Juexin could only spit out these three words simply.He immediately buried his head, unwilling to let Keming see his tears. "I've been waiting for you for a long time. Now that you're here, I have something to tell you," Keming continued. "Third Master, I think it's better for you to sleep for a while. If you have something to say, you can talk about it tomorrow. You are not in good spirits now, and talking too much will hurt your mind," Mrs. Zhang hurriedly interrupted. She felt that talking too much was not suitable for Keming's illness.

"Third dad, let's go to bed early. I'll see third dad tomorrow, and it's the same if third dad has something to say tomorrow," Juexin was also worried about Keming's illness. He thought Zhang's words were good, so he agreed. "Third wife, hang up that half of the curtain," Keming told Zhang Shi instead of answering them directly.Mrs. Zhang had no choice but to walk over, and obediently rolled up the half-hanging curtain and hung it on the hook.Keming said with satisfaction: "It's brighter this way." "Third Master, it's better for you to go to bed early. You are sick, so you should take care of your health," Zhang said worriedly.

"It doesn't matter," Keming shook his head and replied, and he told Mrs. Zhang: "You call Siwazi and Qiwazi here, I have something to say to them." Mrs. Zhang was startled, as if feeling a bad omen.But she had to obey Keming's words.Both Jueying and Jueren are still in the room.She called them to the bed. Seeing his two sons coming, Keming nodded in satisfaction, forced a smile, and said to them, "You two are too naughty. Siwa is not too young, and he will never study well." Mrs. Zhang saw the two children standing in front of the bed in a daze without making a sound, so she urged: "Call daddy quickly. Dad treats you so well, he still thinks of you when he is sick." Jueying and Jueren mechanically called "Father" almost at the same time, with indifferent expressions on their faces.I feel the sleepiness on my face hasn't disappeared yet. Keming looked at his two sons lovingly for a while, then suddenly looked away with a disappointed expression.He looked at Zhang Shi again, and his eyes fell on Zhang Shi's protruding belly again.His eyes lit up.He turned his head to look at Juexin and said, "Mingxuan, don't leave, I have something to say, and I have something to ask you..." Mrs. Tang suddenly staggered into the room with a medicine bag in her hand, shouting, "Third Madam, the medicine is back." Mrs. Zhang agreed to open the medicine package and test the medicine.But Keming stopped her and said, "Don't go, listen to me." "I'm going to see the medicine, Mrs. Tang is waiting to take it to boil, you should take the medicine quickly," Mrs. Zhang said anxiously. "It's the same if you wait for a while. I know that this kind of medicine is not good. My illness will never get better," Keming said with a wry smile.But when he saw Mrs. Zhang shed tears, he couldn't bear it, so he said, "Alright, third wife, you can go. You have seen the medicine and come to listen to me." Mrs. Zhang walked to the square table, opened the medicine packs, opened the small packs of medicines one by one, checked them, then poured them together, and handed them to Mrs. Tang to cook on the big stove in the kitchen.She walked back to the bed again. "Mingxuan, I probably won't get better this time. I have a lot of things to worry about. Once I die, our hometown will be over. Your fourth and fifth fathers came to quarrel with me before and talked a lot Annoying words. They advocate selling the mansion, saying that they have found a buyer, and a teacher is willing to pay 70,000 yuan. I don’t agree, and they don’t dare to do anything. But if I die, it will have to be up to them. Your fourth dad As a parent, I don't know what will happen to the family? Your third aunt is a loyal person, and your fourth and seventh brothers are not very promising. Their grandmother is old, and their two uncles have gone to work in other states and counties. I went. Once I die, who will take care of the three of them? Besides, your third aunt is going to give birth next month. I don’t know if it’s a boy or a girl, but I’ve even thought of a name. The boy’s name is Juehua , the girl’s name is Shuhui. Whether it’s a son or a girl, it’s going to be a burden to your third aunt. I’m even more worried that they will mention the old saying of "bloody disaster" and trick your third aunt out of the city to give birth. This is my last Don't worry. Mingxuan, I know you. You are a sincere and good person. You and my uncle and nephew have a very good relationship. I treat you like my own son. Now I entrust them to you, and you will definitely not let me down I can't take care of my hometown. As long as you manage your own house or two well, you can count on our ancestors. I can only ask you to help me with this kind of thing. You want your third aunt Treat her like my own mother, and I will be grateful when I die in Jiuquan." Keming used great efforts to finish the above words.He spoke slowly, but no one interrupted him, nor did he let out a cough or wheeze.There was an expression of pain on his face, but he never shed a single tear.When he said "grateful", he suddenly turned his head and told Jueying and Jueren: "Aren't you going to kowtow to elder brother? You two stupid bastards, you only know how to mess around every day. I'm afraid there will be a day when you won't even have food! Hurry up!" Kowtow to big brother and beg him to take care of you in the future." Juexin had already shed tears.Mrs. Zhang covered her eyes with a handkerchief and was sobbing.Cuihuan stood in front of the square table and buried her head in tears.Jueying also had a serious expression on his face.Jueren is still dozing off.When Ms. Zhang heard Keming order Brother Jueying to kowtow to Juexin, she couldn't bear it, so she turned around and ran to the sofa, crying loudly. "Third dad, there's no need for that," Juexin whimpered and declined when he heard the "kowtow", "I will definitely listen to third dad and do as third dad wants. Third dad, take a good breath, you don't want to Thinking of those things. We cannot do without you in our family. You can't just leave us!" Juexin said intermittently, his grief seemed much greater than Keming's.Without thinking about it, he put a responsibility on his own shoulders that he really couldn't bear. "If you agree, then I'll be relieved," Keming said with relief.Seeing his two sons still standing in front of the bed, he urged him repeatedly: "Aren't you kowtowing? It's for your own good." After several urgings, the two children had to obey their father's words and gave Juexin a knock.When they got up, they still looked as if nothing had happened, but when Juexin returned the salute, they kowtowed and cried sadly. "Call Cuihuan here," Keming instructed Brother Jueying again. Cuihuan walks to the bed with tears in her eyes.Seeing her coming, Keming ordered, "You kowtow to the young master too." Cuihuan looked at Keming in astonishment, thinking she had heard wrongly. "Cuihuan, daddy is calling you to kowtow to elder brother, do you hear me?" Jueying urged from the side. Cuihuan looked at Juexin, but it was inconvenient to ask why, so she bent down and kowtowed respectfully. Standing in front of Cuihuan, Juexin returned the gift in panic.He didn't know what Keming had to order.Mrs. Zhang got up from the bed, walked to the bed, and stood beside Cuihuan.She looked at Keming tearfully, she knew what Keming was going to say. "This is what your third aunt means," Keming said to Juexin, and then turned his eyes to look at Mrs. Zhang, who nodded slightly: "I think it's not bad. I've always been worried about your marriage. I didn't leave you a child. We persuaded you to continue, but you refused to agree. When I die, no one will take care of your affairs. Your mother is a stepmother, so it is not very good to advise you. Cuihuan people are bad , Your third aunt likes her very much. Your third aunt asked me to give her to you several times. Or, when you are full, take her to take over the house. In the future, there will be someone to serve you and take care of you. In case you give birth to a boy and a half girl , you can also inherit your father’s cigarettes, and I am worthy of your father. I think you are the only one in your generation. The third child is a new school who doesn’t want a family. The second child has also become a radical now. Needless to say, they are all worthless things. The hope of the Gao family rests on you alone. Your grandfather and your father are looking at you secretly." Mingxuan, I'm done.You have to take good care of it.Don't think I'm talking casually. "When Keming said this, two or three drops of tears flowed from his dry eyes. Juexin gratefully agreed.What Keming said was completely unexpected to him.But he could not say a word against his concern for the dying patient.He saw Cuihuan covering his face and sobbing beside him, he couldn't tell whether Keming's "gift" brought him joy or pain.He hadn't thought about such a thing, and hadn't had time to think about it.In short he accepted it resignedly, as he accepted everything else (he was comforted only later when he retreated to his room to think quietly). Mrs. Tang came in with a steaming medicine jar and a rice bowl in her other hand.She put the bowl on the square table, filled a bowl full of concoction, and went out again. Mrs. Zhang rubbed her eyes, walked to the square table, picked up the medicine bowl and put it by her mouth, blowing slowly.Cuihuan also followed Mrs. Zhang to the side of the square table, took out a handkerchief and wiped her eyes. Keming knew that he was going to take medicine, so he stopped talking.He suddenly noticed that Jueren was dozing off in front of the bed, so he waved to Jueying and Jueren and said, "Okay, there's nothing to do now, you two go back to sleep. Get up early tomorrow and go to the study to study." When the two children heard such an order, they hurriedly agreed, turned around and slipped out. Mrs. Zhang brought the medicine bowl to the bed, and Juexin went to help Keming up, and drank most of the bowl of medicine in Mrs. Zhang's hand.Mrs. Zhang took away the medicine bowl.Jueqin and Cuihuan supported Keming to lie down.Keming wiped the concoction off the few short whiskers around his mouth with his hands.After he lay down, he still stared at Mrs. Zhang. "Third Master, you can sleep for a while now," Mrs. Zhang begged. "You have treated me so well," Keming sighed gratefully and said, "I still have something to say to Mingxuan, and I can talk to Mingxuan tomorrow." He closed his eyes reluctantly.Mrs. Zhang was still kneeling on the edge of the bed, carefully covering her husband with a quilt.Keming suddenly opened his eyes again, looked at Mrs. Zhang, then at Juexin, and said forcefully, "Mingxuan, you must take good care of your third aunt. Don't be superstitious about the nonsense of 'bloody disaster'." "Third Master, you can go to sleep for a while, and if you have something to say, you can leave it for tomorrow," Zhang urged with concern from the side. Keming looked at Mrs. Zhang again, and said with a haggard smile, "I'm going to sleep." Then he said in a low voice, "Third wife, I'm thinking about the second daughter. It's fine if you pick her up." "Don't talk about it any more, we can take care of these things after you recover from illness," Mrs. Zhang replied with tears in her eyes, both happy and sad. "I regret that I haven't treated you well all these years," Keming said apologetically.He slowly closed his eyes. Juexin waited for Keming to sleep well before going back to his room.He unexpectedly found Mrs. Shen waiting for him in the room.Mrs. Shen sat on the movable chair, and Mrs. He stood beside the desk.They were talking, when Shen saw Juexin coming in, she said with a smile: "Young Master, I have been waiting for you for a long time. I have something to discuss with you." Her smile was a sad one.Juexin just greeted her respectfully, his heart was still elsewhere.Mrs. He saw that there was nothing wrong, so she went out. "I'm leaving in a month and a half," Shen said only this, and Juexin regretfully interrupted: "Aunt Wu really wants to leave? Why is it so fast? It's not convenient for you to walk alone." "It is because of this person that I came to discuss with you. I would like to ask you to lend me Yuan Cheng for a few months, ask him to send me there, and come back with me in the future. I think Yuan Cheng is a capable person The servant is honest and reliable, and it will be more convenient for me to have him escort me along the way." "However, Dongda Road is not easy to walk at present. I think it's better for Fifth Aunt to go out slowly. Please Fifth Aunt think carefully," Juexin said with concern. Shen sighed, and replied in pain: "I can't live in the mansion any longer. I'm very upset. I'm afraid to see those faces. Although the road is difficult, it's better than living here." "Maybe Fifth Aunt is still thinking about Fourth Sister, so she feels uncomfortable. I think after a while, Fifth Aunt will forget a little bit, so she can let go of her heart," Juexin persuaded sympathetically. "Eldest young master, you have such a kind heart," Shen praised with emotion and sincerity: "I treated you like that before, but you don't hold grudges at all." She went on complaining: "I only blame myself for being bad, what? I caused it all on my own. I know that if I live with your fifth father in the future, I will not have a good life. I have no children. Today your fifth father told me about selling the house , he and the fourth dad found all the buyers, only the third dad refused. The fifth dad said that the third dad was in poor health, and it seemed that he would not live long. He would sell the mansion when the third dad died, and each room would be divided into two. 10,000 to 20,000 yuan. When we move, he will live with him on Monday. I’m really afraid of living until that day! So I’d better leave early. My second brother wants me to go early, so as not to delay Go down, in winter, the weather will be cold, and it will be even more bitter on the road.” Her eyebrows were gathered together, and a layer of dark autumn clouds was spread on her face, which looked very haggard under the dim electric light. It seems that I haven't seen the sun for many years. Juexin fully listened to these words.He knew them very well, and he knew that there was no exaggeration in Shen's words.Every word puts a stone in his heart.In the end she shut up, his heart was so oppressed that he couldn't breathe.He looked sadly at her lifeless face.He struggled for a while before letting out a sigh (in fact, "groaning" would be more appropriate).He couldn't dissuade Shen Shi, so he could only sympathetically say: "Actually, why sell the mansion? I really can't figure it out. But it's also good for Fifth Aunt to come. Fifth Aunt wants to take Yuan Cheng, naturally there is no problem. I'll go there later." Just tell Mom and call Yuan Cheng to give some instructions." "Your mother hasn't come back yet, I went to see it just now," Shen interrupted. "Mom is coming back soon. But Mom will definitely agree. Fifth Aunt, please rest assured," Juexin replied earnestly. "Then, Eldest Young Master, thank you very much," Shen still thanked with a desolate smile. "Aunt Wu still says polite words? I don't usually do anything for Aunt Fifth," Juexin said modestly. Shen shook her head and sighed in pain: "I'm really afraid to bring up the past. Unexpectedly, Zhen'er has been dead for more than a month. Her shadow is still in front of my eyes from time to time." She took out a handkerchief and wiped it from the corner of her eyes. teardrop. Juexin sat silently beside the square table.He felt that there was nothing but sorrow in his heart, nothing but sorrow in this room.Sorrow weighed heavily on him.He can't think of the future, can't think of the light.He gradually felt fear.The fear grew with the ticking of the pendulum of the wall clock in the inner room.The sound of worms outside the window beat on his heart like a dirge.With her head down, Shen sat in front of the desk like an old patient.Her absent-minded little eyes stared blankly at the glass window, as if she was looking for a ghost there.The bust of this small woman (she is much thinner now) becomes the embodiment of pain and sorrow in Juexin's eyes.His fear increased even more.He felt that many sharp needles were slowly piercing his heart, so he gritted his teeth and endured the dull pain.He didn't expect anyone to rescue him. But suddenly there was the sound of hurried footsteps in the passage.The door curtain moved greatly, and Cuihuan ran into the room angrily, and said in panic, trembling, and choked up: "Young master, please go! Our master is in trouble again!" Just at this moment, following Cuihuan's short words, the sound of the three-watch gong sounded outside like a bad news.They seemed particularly loud and frightening this night. "It's over!" This is what Juexin heard from the sound of the gong.