Chapter 19 19

After Hui returned to her own home from Gao's, she abandoned all hope.Her heart is at peace.She just silently and obediently did what others asked her to do.She doesn't laugh, but she doesn't cry either.She hides in her room all day, taking a few old poems or old novels to kill time.She doesn't go anywhere, except to say hello to her grandmother and parents in the morning and evening, and to have breakfast and lunch in the wing room, she doesn't even leave the door.When eating, she often lowered her head and was afraid to speak too much.She ate very little, and she was always the first to set the bowl, and went back to the room early.No one else will keep her.Everyone else in the house is busy, even her cousin Yun has to do some chores.She alone is at leisure.People hardly paid her any attention, but they were all busy with her business.Juexin leaves the company at 2 o'clock every afternoon and comes to Zhou's house. Sometimes he goes shopping, sometimes he stays here, taking care of receiving gifts, posting thank you notes and other things. He always doesn't go home until evening.He sees her two or three times a day.He often asked about her health, and he always said that her face was a little haggard in the past two days, and he wanted her to take care of herself.His words are simple.Her answer is also simple.But she could also understand the deep concern in those words.Her mind was often disturbed at those times, and it was an hour or two before she was able to regain her composure.So she dared not talk much with him.In fact, she rarely had such opportunities.Juexin was always haunted by her parents, as if they couldn't do anything without him.When she was in the room, she sometimes heard Juexin coughing from the wing room. At first she didn't pay much attention to it once or twice, but then she couldn't help but put down the book and meditate for a while.The result of the meditation was a slight sigh, which was her resignation to fate.So she stopped thinking about herself, and often her thoughts were about him.She felt that besides her cousin Yun, he was the only one who really cared about her these days.Every time she met him, even though it was only a short glance, she could understand the deep meaning of his concerned eyes.She appreciates him, she cares about him.But she could not confide her feelings to him.She buried it in her heart as the only bit of warmth and comfort.This warmth and comfort sometimes painted a smile on her face, and sometimes made her have an unforgettable dream.The terrible future life is in front of her, and the doomed day is approaching day by day, but the fear and anxiety she had before have gradually disappeared, and there seems to be nothing in her heart.There seemed to be no future for her, no past.She sometimes even forgets herself.What she thought of and worried about from time to time were new things.

Loh lives day by day like an old man who is tired of life.She is also like a born blind person groping her way in the dark night alone.She had no imaginations, no dreams, no hopes, no visions.She doesn't seem to care about anything in this world.She seemed to be someone who had stepped into another world. But Yun and Juexin pull her back into this world from time to time.Juexin's gaze and words often go deep into her heart.Yun made her know that she still had a past, and made her more or less attached to the present.But this brought her only pain and regret. The approach of the auspicious date makes the whole family more busy.Although Hui didn't go out of the room very often, she also knew that Juexin never took a break because of her work.In the past two days, he came at eleven o'clock in the morning and was busy until the second watch.She seemed to hear that he had encountered some unexpected troubles in order to purchase a new set of wooden furniture to be sent to the husband's house, which made him very anxious.But he finally got it all done.So it's time to "give the ceremony".

The Zhou mansion was painted a few days ago.At this time, a bright red hard color was tied at the gate, and new red paper lanterns were replaced.A pink ceiling curtain was set up in the courtyard, palace lanterns with green spikes and red shades were hung everywhere in the hall, and pink embroidered Eight Immortals were hung on the door of the main room.There are scarlet satin embroidered screens hanging on the two walls of the hall.There is a new atmosphere everywhere.A "samovar" burner was hired, and the stove was placed in one corner of the hall.They also called a group of blind men who played the dulcimer, and put a table in the corner under the window of the right wing room, where they sat and played and sang.

From the morning, everyone began to organize the dowry and prepare to dress and carry the box.There have been guests since the morning, but the ones who come are some relatives who come and go frequently.Qin came early.She asked for leave today to not go to school.She had been here two days earlier, on Sunday, so she had plenty of time to talk to Loh.She knew that she couldn't help Loh's affairs, all she could give Loh was sympathy and encouragement; these were actually not good for Loh (who was trapped in such a helpless situation).However, she still said a lot of words that added to Hui's melancholy in vain.Shuying and Shuhua followed Mrs. Zhou.Zhou also brought Qixia, saying that she would stay here to help for a few days.Shuying's mother, Mrs. Zhang, did not come until the afternoon. She came with her two younger sisters-in-law, Mrs. Wang and Mrs. Shen. After saying goodbye, they stayed here to play cards.

Hui will not come out to meet guests this day.Qin and sister Shuying sat in Hui's mother Chen's room for a while, and then Yun accompanied them to Hui's room.Hui had already finished washing and washing, and was lying on the bed with a book and weeping.When she saw them coming in, she barely sat up and greeted them with a tired smile.Seeing this situation, they spoke very carefully, trying their best not to arouse Loh's unpleasant thoughts.But after talking to them for two or three words, Hui suddenly closed her mouth in a dazed manner, and shed a few tears for no reason. Hui's mood was not peaceful that day.Loud voices and the blind man's playing and singing disturbed it.She seemed to be a prisoner sentenced to death who heard the sound of the gallows being erected in the prison, and only then did she truly experience the horror.She could no longer calmly await that fate.The shadow of doom had hung over her head since morning, bringing terror, pain, sorrow, and deep regret to her.On top of that she felt virginal shyness.She was so overwhelmed that she couldn't move.Gradually she lost the strength to hold herself.She felt that she was the most unfortunate person in the world, so she let the tears fall from time to time.Shuying and Yun also shed a few tears with Hui.Shuying is mostly sad for her own future, she is afraid that she will fall into the same fate.Yun shed tears for sympathy and friendship.She cares about Hui's fate more than they do, and loves Hui more.The two sisters grew up together. ——The marriage of her cousin will leave her lonely, not to mention her cousin's husband's character is not good.

Therefore, besides the grief, Yun also had a little resentment. She was dissatisfied with her uncle, and dissatisfied with his way of marrying off his daughter without proper consideration.It's not that Qin and Shuhua don't care about Hui's fate, they also like Hui very much, and they don't approve of this marriage.But Shuhua is optimistic by nature, and Qin sees things more thoroughly and can hold herself, so they never shed a single tear. The carrying boxes from the man's house arrived in the morning, and they were carried into the middle door with a lot of whistling and beating along the way. There were a total of 30 boxes, containing phoenix crowns and xiapei, dragon and phoenix wedding cakes, etc., and were escorted by two servants.They are placed one by one in the courtyard and on the stone steps, full of them.There are also empty boxes prepared by the Zhou family in the hall.So the Zhou family was busy moving out all the things in the carrying box, and put in the dowries they had prepared, such as gold and silver jewelry, bedding, clothes, tinware, porcelain, and small ornaments, and filled them up. Forty boxes were ordered, and in the afternoon they were lifted up and left.

The main program of the day is over.The rest is just entertaining guests and preparing for the various things that should be done during the wedding.There are not many guests left, but there are also four tables for men and women. Hui hid in her room all day, and sisters Qin and Shuying accompanied her.Qixia also stayed by to serve them.They deliberately found some interesting topics to talk about, trying to relieve Hui's boredom.Yun also wanted to stay in the room with her cousin, or talk more with her cousin, but she had to go out, entertain the female guests, or do some trivial things behind her aunt and mother.When it was time for breakfast, Hui's mother asked someone to set up a table of food in Hui's room, and asked Qin, Shuying, Shuhua, and Yun to accompany Hui to eat. Besides Qixia, she also sent a maid, Mrs. Yang, to serve the meal. .Hui refused to eat at first, but after everyone's persuasion, she reluctantly moved her chopsticks and ate half a bowl of rice.When it was time to eat lunch, there were two tables of male guests in the living room outside, and two tables of female guests in the main room and the left wing room. Sister Qin and Shuying still stayed in the room to eat with Hui.At this time, Hui ate even less, and she only swallowed a few mouthfuls.Seeing her like this, everyone didn't want to eat anything.The banquet outside was very lively, which made the room even more bleak.Even Shuhua doesn't move her chopsticks or speak very often.Shuhua felt lonelier now than in the morning, and suddenly said: "If cousin Yun is here, it will be lively." "I don't know how many times I can have dinner with my second sister in the future," Hui said lightly, her slight Tears glistened again in her red, swollen eyes.

"Cousin Hui, why do you say such things?" Shuhua said in surprise, "Don't you often go home in the future?" "I can't even think about the days to come. I'm afraid I won't live long," Hui said coldly Said, she quickly buried her head.Shuying called "Cousin Hui" softly beside her, her voice weak and miserable.She suddenly put down her chopsticks and let out a choking cough. She stood up rubbing her chest, walked to the spittoon, bent over and spit out a few mouthfuls.It was getting dark gradually. "Second cousin, how are you?" Qin asked with concern, and Shuhua also stood up to beat Shuying's back.Lian Hui stopped her grief and asked Aunt Yang to pour a cup of hot tea for Shuying.

Shuying stopped coughing, took a sip from the teacup, walked up to Hui with the cup, and said to Hui sympathetically, "Cousin Hui, don't say such heart-wrenching words anymore. I'm a little scared." "I'm really Hate. Why should women get married? The world is so big, but we should be women. God is too unfair." Shuhua said angrily. "It's not some kind of unfairness. It should be attributed to our unreasonable social system," Qin Ruo felt it, suddenly made a serious expression, and said in a clear voice. "I think this can be changed. Men and women are the same people. We should place our hope in the future. So, Sister Hui, you should be more at ease. By then, your affairs may have a turn for the better." Hui Han She raised her head and looked at Qin meaningfully, with a little suspicion in her eyes, then she sighed softly as if giving up and smiled bitterly: "Sister Qin, your words may make sense, but I have no hope. Shen Jin It is rare for people in the sea of ​​suffering to be reborn.

Anyway, I made up my mind to let this body float away with the waves. "Yun opened the door curtain and came in. She was wearing a new dress with a red dress underneath. She had just had two glasses of wine outside, and her heavily made-up face also had a blush, and the two dimples became more distinct. She walked in suddenly, and seemed to bring a ray of light and a gust of hot wind to the room. She walked up to Hui and asked very affectionately: "Sister, are you full?I have long wanted to sneak in to see you. "Everyone has put down their bowls, and Qixia is bending over and twisting her facekerchief. The electric lights are starting to glow. Hui smiled at Yun movedly, and agreed in a low voice, "I'm full." "Shuhua said bluntly at the side:" Cousin Yun, don't trust her.Where is she full?She only took a few mouthfuls of food. "Yun looked at Hui in surprise, the blush on her cheeks gradually faded, and the pair of dimples disappeared. She asked with concern: "Sister, really? "Hui nodded helplessly, and gradually lowered her gaze, as if she didn't dare to meet Yun's gaze.

"Sister, you shouldn't have ruined your body like this," Yun said regretfully as she sat down next to Hui. Hui tried to move her mouth. She wanted to laugh, but she couldn't. She sighed weakly and said dejectedly, "Second Sister, how do you think I can swallow the food? My heart..." She swallowed Next, I buried my head down, and casually fiddled with the corner of my clothes with one hand. Yun felt sad for a while, she kept silent and said nothing.Seeing this, Shuhua felt a little regretful that she should have said that recklessly, which instead aroused their sorrow.She was afraid of the silence and hated it, so she persuaded: "Actually, Cousin Hui, you don't have to be too pessimistic. I don't think my cousin's husband is like what others say." Hui buried her head deeper.Yun didn't move her face, as if she never heard Shuhua's words.Shuying glanced at Shuhua reproachfully, and Qin also looked at Shuhua in surprise. Their eyes seemed to say: "Why did you mention him?"Seeing Shuhua's embarrassed expression, Qin asked Yun, "Sister Yun, how many guests are there outside? Is there any trouble at the table?" "Two tables sat loosely, No one eats wine either, they are very polite," Yun said, shaking her head in surprise, looking at Qin.She frowned slightly, and said, "It's really hard to accompany guests there. It's better to have dinner here with you. The male guests in the outer living room are very noisy." She stood up and said to herself Said: "I should go, or Mom will call someone to urge me to go." She looked at Hui again with attachment, said: "Sister, I'm going," and hurried out of the door.Qixia also followed her out. Hui raised her head and looked at Yun's back like a dream, and said to herself unconsciously as if praying: "I hope that my second sister will not be like me in the future." Shuying was shocked when she heard this sentence, she felt This sentence seems to be said to her.A shadow loomed before her eyes, and it took her some effort to drive it away.But she has not been able to make her mind very calm, and she still has to think about some things in the future.The more she thought about it, the more she felt that the future was difficult and there was little hope.She couldn't find a way out, so she fell into deep thought like a dementia. At this time, the electric lights were already on, and the lights outside were even brighter, and the voices of people were noisy.Everyone faced each other silently, and it seemed that the room was very bleak.A wooden wall actually separated two worlds.Shuhua couldn't bear it anymore, she wanted to find a few words to break the dull air.She chatted casually, and everyone responded without much interest.Qin talks about hope for the future, but Loh seems to be afraid of the future.Then the topic turned to the "past".A few pleasant memories gradually changed the air in the room.Both Shuying and Hui's attention were attracted by this topic.They temporarily close their minds in their hearts, and let the memories carry them to happier surroundings. They talked for a while, and everyone was interested, and the loud voices outside did not disturb their attention.Suddenly Qixia hurried into the room and said to Shuying: "Second Miss, the third wife is calling you to go quickly, the third wife is waiting for you." Shuying agreed and stood up quickly.Qixia went to the bed and opened the folded skirt and handed it to Shuying.Shuying took the skirt and tied it.She said goodbye to Loh.Everyone stood up to see her off.Qin also said that she wanted to go back.Hui looked at Qin, and said with attachment: "You want to go too? Why do you have to go when you say go? "Hui hadn't finished speaking when Yun came in in a panic. She urged Shuying without sitting down and said, "Second cousin, tell you to go quickly. waiting for you. "Shuying hurriedly said a few words to Hui, then greeted Qin and followed Yun out. It was louder outside.It seems that many sedan chairs are crowded in the courtyard.Someone was calling: "Bring up the sedan chair of Mrs. Gao San." The bearer agreed, and the sedan chair was moving. One and two sedan chairs went out.Others pushed up again.Qin smiled gently at Hui, trying to comfort Hui with this smile.Qin said: "Anyway, I will come tomorrow afternoon. I have class tomorrow morning. Mom didn't eat here today, and I'm afraid she'll wait for me. I'd better go back early." After she finished speaking, she turned her head and told Qixia, Qixia, check to see if Zhang Sheng is here, and tell him to bring up the sedan chair." Qixia agreed with a "yes", but still stood beside her, waiting for Hui's decision.But Hui didn't want to keep her anymore, she murmured "That's fine", and then begged Qin, "You have to come early tomorrow." When Qixia heard this, she left without asking any questions. When Qin left, Shuying had already followed Zhang.There was no light in the outer drawing room.The hall was also quiet.The congratulations are almost gone.Juexin also went home later.Only Zhou and Shuhua (and Qixia) stayed at Zhou's house to sleep.Yun gave up her room to Mrs. Zhou, and she temporarily put up a bed in Hui's room. She and Shuhua slept there together, saying that they were "accompanying my sister". The next morning everyone was busy.Mrs. Zhou came to "open face" to Hui. She carefully twisted the hair on Hui's face and neck with silk threads, and at the same time told Hui some etiquette when going to someone else's house to be a daughter-in-law.Hui silently let Zhou Shi open her face, she felt a slight pain, and she also felt the shyness of a virgin.She doesn't say a word.She resolutely closed her eyes and let others do everything to her.She always had a sad look on her face that day.In the afternoon, Qin, Shuying and Shuzhen all came.In the evening, the few sisters had dinner together, still in Hui's room.It was like a farewell banquet, and no one was smiling.Even Shuhua, who is optimistic, and Qin, who believes in the "future", shed tears.Hui didn't shed many tears, but her haggard and miserable face made people feel even more sad when they saw it. After the guests left, Hui's room fell into silence again.Shuhua and Yun were called to work in Mrs. Zhou's room.Mrs. Chen went to Hui's room, and the mother bid farewell to the daughter she had raised for twenty years with a feeling of attachment.Mother said a lot.The daughter bowed her head in obedience.Mother's words were very frank, and there was no third person in this room to listen to them.The mother earnestly instructs her daughter how to behave when she arrives at the Zheng family.She taught her daughter the etiquette of being a daughter-in-law.The Zhou family has already told Hui about this level.It's pretty much the same as what she said at the moment. Chen said something repeatedly, her voice gradually turned into a sob.Loh looked up at her slightly in surprise and grief, her face was covered with tears.Seeing this face, Mrs. Chen felt uncomfortable for a while, couldn't bear it anymore, burst out crying and complained: "Hui'er, I'm really sorry for you. I let you go to Zheng's house, how can I rest assured. It's your father's hard-heartedness that hurt you.I didn't agree to this marriage..." Mrs. Chen couldn't continue, and wept in a low voice like a timid child who has been wronged, wiping her eyes frequently with a handkerchief. Originally, it was the mother who persuaded the daughter, but now it is the daughter who persuades the mother.Seeing her mother crying, Hui stopped her grief.She reluctantly said to her mother in a calm tone: "Mom, don't be sad. This is fate. My fate is like this, no wonder you. I can go to Zheng's house to live my life..." Although Hui tried her best to keep her tone calm, But there was still a sigh in the voice.Her eyes were dry, but the tears kept flowing to her heart. "I hope it can be like this..." Chen also stopped crying, but still said in a sad voice.The mother and daughter sat opposite each other in silence for a while.Gradually, Mrs. Chen regained her original tranquility, said a few more words of comfort to Hui, and then left the room listlessly. This night Hui did not close her eyes all night.Her mother's words disturbed her heart. Nostalgia for the past and fear of the future tormented her alternately.She thought of many things before and after, and the more she thought about it, the more sad she felt.She covered her head with the quilt and cried in a low voice, not daring to let Shuhua and Yun who were sleeping on the other bed in her room hear.She cried until dawn. At dawn, voices rang out in the mansion.People gradually became active.This day is a positive day, and they should be busier than the previous day or two.Loh got up early. She doesn't speak, she doesn't smile, she is obediently asked to make up her, and she is at the mercy of others. She is completely like a puppet without feelings.Her father Zhou Botao got up very early.He walked from room to room, walking here and there with an anxious expression on his face.Servants came to him every now and then, reporting something to him, or asking him for this or that.One of the servants assigned to escort the sedan chair suddenly fell ill and had to find someone to take his place.The female relatives found that something was missing again, and they wanted to discuss with him to add it immediately.Zhou Botao couldn't deal with these things calmly, and he was very upset.He saw Young Master Mei wearing a long robe and mandarin jacket, walking around slowly, unable to do anything, he was even more annoyed, so he cursed, "It's useless." People go to please feel new.Before the servant left, Juexin arrived.When Zhou Botao saw Juexin, he was very happy. He immediately greeted Juexin and asked Juexin to manage everything.They have been busy all morning.Everyone gathered around a round table in the left wing room and had a hasty breakfast, waiting impatiently for the bridegroom to come to greet the bride. Qin and Shuying came one after another, they came earlier than the groom, and they wanted to accompany Hui until she got into the bridal sedan chair. Around one o'clock in the afternoon, the bridegroom arrived in an arched sedan chair, the bearer yelled to put down the sedan chair, the servant of the Zheng family handed over the post, and the servant of the Zhou family went in to announce.Say "please" inside.The bridegroom came in from the middle door cautiously with his hands hanging down, and Juexin entertained him. When he arrived in the main room, he saluted the ancestors of the Zhou family, and then accompanied by Juexin to send him out.The men and women of the Zhou family hid in each room and watched the groom secretly through the cracks in the doors and windows.The groom was a short young man. Although he wore the same bonus with slanted shoulders and a doctor's cap with a pair of golden flowers on his head, his appearance seemed ridiculous.Especially striking was his unusually wide square face, set low on narrow shoulders, which made it appear from behind that he had no neck at all.The face is fairly straight, but the teeth in the mouth are protruding, and the skin on the lips is not covered at all. Zhu Hui cried softly in her mother's room, and Shuying and others persuaded her.Both Yun and Shuhua took a peek at the groom's appearance.Qin also took a look.That face gave Qin a feeling of disgust, which made Yun's face show a painful expression, causing Shuhua to make a low voice of resentment. As soon as the groom walked out of the middle door, some people secretly made dissatisfied comments.Everyone complained for Hui, and sighed for Hui's unfortunate fate.Mrs. Zhou, her two daughter-in-laws (Chen and Xu), one daughter (Zhou), especially Hui's mother, were very disappointed, and felt that their hearts were half-cold, as if they had fallen into an ice cellar; they had to He secretly blamed Hui's father for being blind and choosing such a person as his son-in-law.They looked lovingly at Hui who covered his face and wept, feeling very sad.But they have no time to think about it.They should immediately make preparations to send Hui into the sedan chair. When Juexin came back after seeing off the groom, Zhou Botao greeted him.He held back his heartache and said a few words to his uncle.He saw Zhou Botao still had a calm smile on his face, and he felt disgusted with this middle-aged man.He couldn't stand his uncle's air of talking, so he left Zhou Botao with an excuse.He walked to the door of the main room, and suddenly saw Master Mei walking out with a pale face.The weak child said indignantly: "Big cousin, how could dad betroth my sister to such a person?" When that person lived together, his heart was like being cut slowly by several knives.He sighed slightly. "Listen, my sister is crying so badly." Young master Mei pushed his mouth towards his mother's room and said horribly. There was a painful spasm on Juexin's face.Before he could speak, another voice sounded from behind and answered instead of him: "Women always cry like this when they get on the sedan chair." The person who spoke was Jue Min. full of anger.He deliberately said such provocative words. "You don't understand, you don't understand." Juexin suddenly shook his head and said to Juemin angrily. The sound of gongs and suona was loud outside, and a group of people hugged and carried the sedan chair into the gate.Juexin frowned and entered the main room.The people in the room and the main room immediately became flustered.Hui was surrounded by the female relatives into the main room and let her sit on a chair, while the Zhou family was busy wearing a phoenix crown and Xiapei for her.While crying, she let others manipulate her.The sedan chair has already entered the middle door and put it down in front of the main room.The bearers yelled and carried the sedan chair into the main room, leaving the back half of the body outside.Now is the time for the bride to get on the sedan chair.People called young master Mei to carry Hui into the sedan chair.Hui cried and struggled, refusing to get into the sedan chair, and Master Mei had no strength at all, and needed Juexin to help. There are also female relatives to support.Hui struggled for a while, and a pearl flower fell from her head. Yun picked it up at the side, but there was no way to put it back on for her.Loh's struggle made several people shed tears.Seeing that everyone had nothing to do with her, her mother went up and whispered two or three words in her ear with tears in her eyes, and she obediently let them hug her into the sedan chair. The thick car curtain was lowered, and the sedan chair was lifted.A group of people hugged and carried the sedan chair out.At this time, the sedan chairs of the male and female guests who saw off their relatives had already left first, and the sedan chairs slowly left the gate of Zhou's house.Sister-in-law Yang, who was dowry, put on new clothes and sat in a sedan chair, and followed the sedan chair to Zheng's house. Everyone stood in the main room and watched the sedan chair go out of the middle door in a daze.Hui's miserable cry could still be heard from the tightly closed sedan chair, but it was finally overwhelmed by the sound of gongs and suonas, and went away far away.The matter of LOH has come to an end. Several people sighed in relief, as if the stone in their hearts had been removed.The hearts of the younger generation are still filled with sympathy and anger.Qin and Juemin began to talk about this matter. They stood under the upper right window and talked. Shuhua and Yun also joined in. Shuying just stood by and listened quietly.Master Mei also went there to listen to them, but he couldn't listen.He will go to Zheng's house in a while, and he will stay there to sit.He went in a special capacity to that strange place, so many strange guests, and those heavy etiquettes—it was enough to embarrass him just thinking about it.Although Juexin agreed to go with him, for him, all kinds of troubles would not be relieved much.He is worried, he is afraid.He was excited, and he anxiously passed the time.He walked anxiously and asked Juexin when he would go to Zheng's house. The people gathered in the main room gradually dispersed, and Juexin walked down the stone steps alone, with Hui's crying still ringing in his ears.He understood Loh's mood, not only understood, but he fully sympathized with her.When he saw the miserable struggle, he thought of the destruction of a lovely life. He unconsciously remembered the tragic ending of Mei and Ruijue, and he thought of the painful years he had experienced in the past.Layer after layer of black shadows all came to weigh on his heart.He couldn't bear it anymore.He also wants to struggle.But the oval face dangled in front of his eyes with a desperate expression of pleading for help.That face was familiar to him, precious to him.Those words that made his heart tremble with gratitude had been uttered from those small red lips; the few glances of concern had been looked at him from those watery eyes full of affection.This is something he will never forget.At the moment when he had lost everything he held dear and was left with only a fragile heart, that person was a bright light in his life, and those words and those eyes were his only comfort and reward.That man was too precious to him. He couldn't lose her, and he couldn't watch her fall into a tragic fate, and let that lovely young life be destroyed very quickly.He should have saved her, he should have saved that.He should struggle as hard as he can. —he thought so excitedly.However, Master Mei came over. "Big cousin, shall we go?" Young Master Mei asked anxiously, with a melancholy and anxious expression on his face. "Ah, where are you going?" Juexin said vaguely as if waking up from a dream.He looked around in surprise, and suddenly understood: everything is over, irreversible.It's too late now.And it was he who sent her to that terrible place, and he who helped others push her to that miserable fate.This time he himself had destroyed the last of his precious possessions, the last of his darlings.What else could he say?He felt dizzy, his eyes went dark, his body couldn't hold on, and he fell down with his strength loose. "Big cousin. Big cousin." Young Master Mei cried out in horror.He hurriedly supported Juexin. "What's the matter? What's the matter?" Juemin and Zhou Botao ran over at the same time and asked anxiously. Juexin opened his eyes and smiled blankly, and replied with difficulty: "I don't have anything, I'm a little tired, and I'll be fine in a while." "Brother, you'd better go home and rest," Juemin suggested.Zhou Botao was anxious and apologetic, he also advised Juexin to go home and rest.Juexin refused to agree at first, and said that he would accompany Young Master Mei to Zheng's house, but later he felt that he was very tired and could not support him, so he left and went home.