Chapter 4 3. The woman caught in the book

The almighty starling always tells the disasters of human beings like a witch, and it uttered a new word with a hoarse voice: "Alarm, fucking alarm!" It was a prolonged cry, rising from the Drum Tower and circling over the ancient city.Pedestrians fled in panic in the streets and alleys, trampling my memory into disjointed fragments.The windows were covered with opaque black curtains.The window panes were pasted with criss-cross anti-vibration paper strips.power cut.Put another umbrella-shaped paper cover on the glass cover of the kerosene lamp.The godmother had already calmed down from her panic, she breathed a sigh of relief and said, "That's it, that's all."

The siren was howling in the sky, but the little hen had its comb flushed red, and it crowed fearlessly underground. Holding a white egg in her hand, the godmother boasted to her parents who were under the table: "The chicken has laid an egg!" The parents looked at the egg, smiled wistfully, came out from under the table, and began to pack their luggage. The ground is full of books.In a hardcover book, a photograph fell out.I picked up that photo.As I remember, it should be a sixty-foot-sized photo.In the photo, a slender woman in a black dress stood sideways, neat bangs, short cut hair, half-hidden thin cheeks, a pair of almond-shaped eyes showing me a sad expression. 

I ran over and asked my mother, "Who is she?" My mother looked at the photo, glanced at my father, and said, "Ask your father!" I ran to my father again and asked, "Who is she?" My father looked at the photo, then at my mother, and asked me, "Where did you find it?" I said: "Book." The corner of the father's mouth twitched, and he said, "Put her back!" I clipped the photo into the book and asked persistently, "Who is she?" The air froze, and the parents looked out the window silently. The godmother ran over and took me away.

I cried out in humiliation at the lack of an answer, "Who is she?" Father and mother still maintained an iron-like silence. From then on, I had doubts about the world, and my heart was cast with an indelible shadow. There was a beautiful and melancholy woman hiding in the shadow.I peeked at that photo many times and remembered every detail, including a mole on the left corner of her lip.The godmother found that I was looking at her again, and hurried over and said, "Why did you let her out again? You want to make your mother unhappy again, don't you!" Whenever I put her back in the book, I always feel her anger. Loneliness and loneliness.After a long, long time, I heard my mother tell my aunt that she was a talented girl from the music department of K female teacher in the provincial capital.When her father listened to her playing the pipa and guzheng at the Nanyang Association, he was so intoxicated that he shed tears.She also took out her father's collection of novels and asked him to sign them.Later, someone found them in and out of parks or restaurants.The father had her picture again and hid her in the book.She didn't have the strength to get out of the book, it was a very thick book.

No alarm was raised that day.Father got in Lao Cai's car and went out. My mother also took my hand out of the courtyard. The starling disappeared under the eaves, and it was reviewing human language in the dark doorway: "Liu Xiang, Liu Xiang, Hu spicy soup, have you eaten? Haha, eat, eat! Gude Maoning, alarm, fuck Alarm, haha!" I didn't hear "Bageyalu", so I was happy that it killed this "roundworm". Liu Xiang ran out from the doorway, "Teacher Meng, where are you going?" Mother said, "Follow Lao Cai's car." Liu Xiang pulled the car and ran on the avenue between Panjia Lake and Yangjia Lake.I saw the Dragon Pavilion directly in front of me, and that was the first time I saw the Dragon Pavilion.It is located on the shore of an empty lake, looking down on the entire ancient city from north to south.Lao Cai's car has already parked in front of Longting.Father jumped out of the car and walked to the back of Longting.When Liu Xiang parked the car next to Lao Cai, his father had already disappeared into the shadow of Longting.Liu Xiang stretched his neck and looked behind Longting.

"What are you looking at?" Lao Cai glanced at Liu Xiang, "Turn the front of the car over!" Mother took my hand and walked towards Longting.I think it is towards a dignified old man.The base of the Dragon Pavilion is a hill that rises abruptly.The main hall stands high on it, covering half of the sky.Pigeons are flying over the hall.The pigeon whistle trembled across the blue sky, blended into the white clouds, and disappeared into a corner of the ancient city.That is my first distant and sentimental nursery rhyme. My mother and I stopped under a willow tree on the north shore of the lake.The low-hanging willow silk is like a transparent curtain reflecting the blood-red setting sun, hiding my mother and me in the depths of the willow shade.On the west meadow, a father and a woman are walking.They turned their backs to me and my mother.But I could see that it was a young woman with short hair and a black dress.The setting sun cast an undulating halo on the father and the woman, outlining their silhouettes walking away side by side.I didn't have time to tell if she was the woman in the photo, she had followed my father into the shadow of the city wall.That was the city wall of the Song Dynasty. It couldn't withstand the bombardment of the devil's cannon, and my mother was the first to be hurt.Mother's body trembled as she watched her father and a young woman go away in the shadow of the city wall.I wanted to call out to my father, but my mother stuffed a spicy candy into my mouth.My mother's belly had grown and I knew I was going to have a younger brother.My younger brother's heartbeat in the mother's womb was anxious and strong.

My mother and I went home in Liu Xiang's "foreign car", leaving Lao Cai behind.Lao Cai shrunk his head, sat on the back of the car with a cigarette in his hand, and looked at the empty lake indifferently.I think he is waiting for my father.Liu Xiang glanced at my mother, then picked up the handlebars, and ran on the way back without making a sound, without humming or hooting the air horn.Only a small triangular flag was erected on the handlebar and fluttered in the wind.He told his mother that it was the flag of the "Rickshaw Against the Enemy Association", of which he was a member.

When my father came back, it was already dark, but my mother blew out the lamp with a "poof".The silence made me feel the weight of the darkness.My father's voice came from the darkness: "As I said, I just said goodbye to her." The silence oppressed me again.The father said again in the dark: "Don't think too much, nothing will happen. She will go out with the school to escape, now there is only war." Since then, "war" has been stored in my memory as an overwhelming word, accompanied by a mysterious woman.The shadow of this woman appears and disappears from time to time, covering my father's life.

Immediately afterwards, I saw "war" in my mother's school. That evening, I got into Liu Xiang's "foreign car" to pick up my mother from school.The school turned into a hospital, and there was not a single student in sight.Liu Xiang led me into the school gate, paused for a moment, and said, "Ah, wounded soldiers!" I saw a group of soldiers with mutilated limbs and uniforms stained with blood.It was the first time that my vision was so terribly impacted, as if I had come to another world full of horror, and my eyes were full of deformed human figures.A person with one leg and half an arm, a person whose head is as big as a bucket covered in overlapping bandages, a person covered in blood, with a sallow complexion and dull eyes, whose head is hooked down like a bean sprout, lying on the side without a sound or expression In the playground, leaning against the wall, they are like tree stumps that have been felled by knives and axes, burned by fire, and gnawed by the teeth of wild animals and lost consciousness.

Horrific cries came from the classroom window.Liu Xiang hugged me and approached the window.I saw that the desks had been joined together and covered with white sheets.A group of people in white hats and coats were busy around the sound of crying.I suddenly saw a big bloodless hand. It was a big hand that was separated from the human body. It was connected to a blood-stained arm. It was held by a man in white on a white porcelain plate, as if it had just been broken from a tree stump. A stubble of a tree branch, with blood streaks jumping around on the stubble.The man in white threw his hand into a white enamel bucket, but he didn't want to let it go, and stretched out from the bucket again, his blue-gray fingers tremblingly scratching at the edge of the bucket.A man with half an arm missing was crying loudly: "Give it back to me, give me back your hand, it was given to me by my mother!" Liu Xiang cried.The horror made me put my cheek on Liu Xiang's shoulder, but in the corner of the wall behind the vat, I saw a bunch of separated hands and feet, piled bloody on the ground.I was cold all over, and my hands trembled involuntarily.I crossed my hands into my armpits, feeling that it was not safe there, and hurriedly hid my hands behind my back.I saw a person wearing a big mask walking towards the window, so I kicked Liu Xiang and said, "Go home, I want to go home!" When I saw a pair of mother's eyes on the big mask, I cried "Wow". stand up.The mother under the white hat and coat made me feel like another person, but I heard her voice: "Go quickly, don't scare the child!" When Liu Xiang took me away, I struggled and shouted to my mother: "Hand, your hand?" Mother stretched out her hand and said, "What's the matter? What's wrong with my hand?" I saw that my mother's hand was still growing in the same place, but she was wearing rubber gloves.I pointed to the corner of the wall and cried loudly, "Their hands... are dead!" Liu Xiang hugged me and left the window, then stood on the playground again, gritted his teeth and said, "Little Japan, Son of a bitch!"

When Liu Xiang walked out of the school with me in his arms, a group of women hurried over carrying several stretchers.I suddenly saw the woman in the photo, she was carrying a corner of the stretcher, flashing past me.A pair of melancholy almond-shaped eyes full of confusion and anxiety.There is also the conspicuous mole, which is rising and falling with the panting lips. At night, my hands cramp and my fingers curl up like chicken feet.As soon as my father took my hand, I screamed and retracted my hand.My father carried me to a small hospital at the entrance of the alley. The doctor's face was gloomy and he didn't know what to say.When I came back, my mother was whispering to my godmother.The godmother said: "That's scary!" The godmother took the flashlight, picked up a big broom, went to the entrance of the alley, and put my flower pocket on the broom, and the flashlight shone brightly on the road. The broom was sweeping on the road, and as I walked home, I called my nickname in a drawn-out voice:  Madara, Madara, let's go home, the little Japanese is here and I will beat him, Big ghosts and little ghosts are not afraid. Madara, Madara, we have hands, Dare to pick up ingots and beat dogs, The little Japanese asked us to lead him away, "Hu Tom" gave him a brick.  The godmother kept on reciting a little song, and dragged the broom all the way into the west room, then took off the flower pocket and put it on me.That night, the godmother wrapped me in a flower bag, held me in her arms, rubbed my little hands with her rough, warm big hands, and hummed the little song "Calling the Soul" while half asleep.My hand felt safe in the godmother's big palm, Xiaoqu'er propped up a fiery red curtain to cover me, and life returned to my hand. It was morning when I woke up.I saw the godmother's son coming.The godmother's son is named Mai Sui'er.The godmother said that that summer, when she went to the field to pick ears of wheat, her belly was too big to bend down, so she knelt down in the field to pick ears of wheat.I only picked up half a basket of ears of wheat, and my stomach hurts, so I didn't have time to go home, so I gave birth to this ear of wheat on the ground.When I saw Maisui'er, he was already a big black boy of twelve or thirteen years old, and when he entered the door, he called: "Mom, I'll take you home!" Why are you crying?" Mai Sui'er held up a small wicker cage and shook it above my head to tease me.I heard the Grasshopper screaming "squeaky" in the cage, and I jumped after the wheat ears to grab the cage, but I almost couldn't reach the cage.The godmother said: "Yes, you tell him to jump more and grab twice more, people with long hands must dare to grab and hold!" Maisui made me run around in the yard, and the godmother quarreled with him again: "Okay! Don’t tease him, I can’t hear him cry today!” Mai Sui’er handed me the little cage and told me to hold it, went into the kitchen to scoop up a scoop of raw water, drank it with her neck upright, and then grabbed the big broom , Sweeping the yard "shuashuashua".Father was busy packing things into suitcases and baskets.The mother came over with her swollen belly in her hands, "Sui'er, you rest, what time is it, there is no need to sweep the yard." The godmother said, "Ask him to do the sweeping, you have to live your life the way you want!" said the mother. "Sui'er, the war is in chaos, do you still remember that your Ban brother likes grasshoppers?" Mai Sui'er said: "There are plenty of them in the bean tree at my house." The godmother then said: "No matter how powerful the little Japanese is, little katydid It's still called, isn't it!" At noon, the godmother put a "bib" around my neck and wanted to feed me again.The mother said: "He can eat by himself, don't worry about him, you and Mai Sui'er have a good Ansheng meal." The godmother said: "Ask me to feed him again." As she spoke, the circles of her eyes turned red up.Both parents put down their chopsticks and looked at the godmother silently.What I ate that day were dumplings filled with shepherd's purse brought by Mai Sui'er.When the godmother made dumplings, she hummed a nice nursery rhyme: "Shepherd's purse, make dumplings, puppies and puppies, let's eat." The godmother picked up the dumplings with chopsticks and fed them to me. He blew hot air around his mouth, and then sent it to mine.I ate very well, and I don't know why the godmother took off her headscarf to wipe her tears. In the afternoon, the godmother took me to the small west room to put me to bed.The mother scolded and said: "The child is almost four years old, and you still want to hug him?" The godmother said: "Don't worry about it, I just want to hug him." Brother Maisui followed quietly.But the godmother told him to sit on a small bench, take a nap against the corner of the wall, and then fanned me and hummed: "Puppy, puppy, go to sleep, I will beat him when the little Japan comes!..." The fan fanned more and more The softer, the godmother's voice gradually faded away, her forehead felt hot, and something fell down.My mother said that the godmother gave me everything she could, and the last thing she gave me was a tear the size of a bean. When I woke up, the godmother was gone, and so was Maisui.Only the small cage is still hanging on the window lattice, and the lonely grasshopper is calling me with its teeth. The next day, I started my childhood escape. When I left Xixiaoge, I cried and begged to be my mother, my voice became hoarse from crying, and I fell into a coma with a high fever.Mother said, I went to find my godmother.Lao Cai changed to a shelf car and took me and Grasshopper.Liu Xiang also used a "foreign cart" to take his old mother to the countryside for refuge.I vaguely remember that people and cars crowded out of the alley.Liu Xiang's starling cage was covered with a black cloth cover, and he was beating continuously on the cart.Liu Xiang said that the world is in chaos, so you can't let mynah see and hear it, lest it disturb the bird's heart and dirty the bird's mouth.But the mynah yelled in the black cover: "Liu Xiang, fuck the alarm!" Seven years later, we escaped from Shaanxi and returned.When I was eleven years old, I followed my fifteen-year-old elder brother to find the courtyard of "Xiaoxiaoge".The gatehouse got smaller, the house got smaller, the tree got smaller, everything felt strange to me.Xiaoyuan has a gloomy face and doesn't recognize me anymore.A red lantern was added to the gatehouse, and a woman with heavy makeup and a cigarette between her fingers stood there.She blew a smoke ring into my elder brother's face, and my elder brother and I got out of the smoke ring, turned and fled in panic, and turned to the doorway where Lao Cai and Liu Xiang lived, where the owners also changed , I can no longer hear the cry of mynah. My eldest brother and I found Mai Sui'er in a village in the northern suburbs of Kaifeng.He has become an adult, and he is riding on the ridge to mend the holes in his thatched house. When he saw me and my elder brother, he was stunned for a moment, jumped down from the slope of the house, and said, "Is it Madara, is it Se?" His voice He had become thicker, his face was black with mud and straw, and his vivid expression could no longer be seen.The eldest brother handed a basket of steamed buns to Mai Sui'er.He took it silently, lowered his head and said, "Let's go, tell my mother to eat first." He led my eldest brother and me outside the village, walked in the sandy nest, crossed a yellow sand hill, and came to a small grave. Put the steamed bun basket on the ground, and said to the grave bag: "Mother, Ban and Se came to see you." Both my elder brother and I burst into tears.Cornspike turned her back and looked at the gray sky with silent tears streaming down her face.The wind was very strong that day, and the yellow sand on the Yellow River beach rushed over, slapping the desolate and helpless village, and fine sand waves surged on the small grave, like wrinkles on the face of a godmother.I heard the call of the grasshopper in the seabuckthorn grass, it was the grasshopper seven years ago.