Chapter 8 Merry big paging.3

The scorching sun, joint cicadas.Stele: Wollongong. Lonely small mountain village, dilapidated cobblestone road.The thatched eaves are low and small, and the villagers are idle.Scrambled slogans were painted on the walls: "Down with the traitor Cao Cao!" "Smash Sun Quan's dog's head!" "Liu Bei concealed the reactionary history, heinous crime!" "Liu Biao is a bitch!" "To fight against the outside world, we must first settle down at home, against ethnic division." "Eat his mother, wear his mother, Cao Gong will not pay when he comes!"

"Warmly celebrate the Hulao Pass victory!" "Taoyuan Sanjie is another gangster of the Plum Blossom Party!" "The martyrs who died in Gongdu will live forever!" "When one person joins the army, the whole village is honored." "Killing, burning and looting everything is our basic national policy!" Under the slogan, idlers play chess (with stones), short clothes and long shirts, sitting and lying down.A few teenagers gathered around a three-legged billiard table and used wooden sticks and clay pellets to play billiards.A boy temporarily put aside the steamed bun he had eaten twice, and was run away by a yellow dog.The young man chased after him, and saw a relatively neat house at the end of the stone road, with a plaque hanging on the gate: "Kongming Primary School Pang Tong Title".

A young woman in the courtyard was drying the quilt and other things, her brows showed a cool and heroic posture, her movements were quick, and she seemed to be resentful.There is an advertisement printed on the sheets: One Call - 188. The young woman whipped the willow stick once, covered her eyes to see that the sun was already high, turned around and hurried up the steps, opened the door and shouted: "Kong Ming, Kong Ming! Don't get up yet! The sun is drying your ass. Sleep all day long, let me drink the northwest wind with you for the rest of your life!" It was written on the door that you are poor and strong, and you will not fall into the blue sky.

There was a long yawn in the room, and a man slowly recited in a strange foreign accent: "Whoever realizes the big dream first, I know it all my life. The thatched cottage is full of sleep in spring, and the sun is getting late outside the window. " Walking out of the door came a tall, thin man with the virtues of Wang Zhiwen.While walking, tie a long shirt and stretch your waist.Turn the four-line poem just now into a weird little tune and hum casually, and then sing "Empty City Strategies". The young woman whipped her buttocks with a willow stick from behind: "You still sing! You still sing! You can sing "Empty City Strategies"!"

Kong Ming dodged and begged for mercy: "Madam, please be merciful. If you beat me to death, it will affect the development of the entire international situation. Did you hit my ass casually? I am Zhuge Liang!" "Hmph! Zhuge Liang, Zhuge Liang, do you think that you are a head taller than others after drinking a full stomach of ink? I see you through now. It turns out that in college, I admired you so much that I refused to accept you even if I was in college. Yes. But after following you, you didn't become an official, and you didn't make any money. You ran to this remote Wollongong to be the king of children. You can't earn half a bottle of vinegar for a month, you, you make me sad.

Do you know how the outside world evaluates you now? " "It is said that I am planning a strategy and winning thousands of miles away, right?" Kong Ming did aerobics. "Bah! People have made up a new word now, saying that it is the three cobblers, so Zhuge Liang! Think about it, your value is only three cobblers, what is so beautiful about you? Tell you, if you don't give it to me again If you look like a dog, I'm going to be a public relations lady, anyway, the world is in chaos now, and there are so many yamen for employing people." When Kong Ming heard this, he sighed: "Oh, dear madam, don't be angry, you have been wronged all these years. But you are also a graduate of the history department, and you should know the truth of late bloomers. Many great men were unknown when they were young. , just like me, I put all my love on you. Later, it didn’t turn around very much. Hey, if you show your ambitions and change your body, you will fill the world with love. God will send a big responsibility to you, and you must let this People suffer first, so how difficult it was for Confucius to publish a book? Wang Zhaojun is so beautiful--he is almost catching up with you, isn't he also overwhelmed by a run?"

"You will use these big principles to coax me, and you won't come with some benefits? When you are late, I will become Grandma Liu. You just like the new and hate the old, right?" "What's the matter? My dear, Can I worry about you? You think I sleep all day long, but in fact, I am also thinking about it these days. I, Zhuge Liang, who is so knowledgeable, can endure a lifetime in this thatched cottage? You don’t understand, this is to increase popularity It's a kind of trick. I, Zhuge Liang, don't go out of the mountain, but once I get out of the mountain, I will protect whoever is the emperor! But right now I am not sure who is the best to go to."

"Don't you have so many old classmates? Pang Tong, Xu Shu, Sima Hui, and your brother Zhuge Jin, the youngest has become the chief of the office. You won't consult with them?" "What Ma'am is saying is, am I waiting for Sima Hui's reply? He said that Cao Cao will hold a talent exchange fair in the past two days. I asked him to get me an admission ticket. Why haven't I got it yet? Call Me?……" "Beep, beep." The BP machine beeped. Kong Ming took out the BP machine from his arms and read: "Prime Minister Cao is a meritocracy, don't miss this opportunity, hurry up and get your tickets."

Kong Ming pulled his wife over and said joyfully, "Honey, the opportunity has come, I'll go right away, I have to get a teacher and brigade commander to do it! Go quickly, and get my feather fan!" "It's such a hot day, let's change to a cattail fan." "You don't understand, the feather fan can show you have knowledge and character, and the cattail fan is only used when I fan you at home." The couple looked at each other and smiled. Madam was collecting sheets in the yard, it was past noon.hooves. ．Knock on the courtyard door.The lady asked, "Who is it?"

"Qing asked if Mr. Zhuge Kongming lived here?" "That's right." Madam stepped forward to open the courtyard door, "Please come in." Three people walked in.A fat yellow man with two small wind wheels instead of earrings on his big ears, turning straight against the wind.A red face and long beard, a bit like George Bernard Shaw.The other has a leopard head with ring eyes and a beard and black face, like Tyson released from prison.All three had swords on their waists.There are several horses tied outside the door. Fatty Huang cupped his hands and saluted: "My servant is Liu Bei and Liu Xuande. I will specially lead the two brothers Guan Yu and Zhang Fei to visit Mr. Kong Ming." He took out his business card and handed it over.Guan and Zhang stood still.

The lady took the business card and said: "Oh, what a coincidence, two old classmates came and forced him to drink. These days, people always come to ask him to do things, in fact, he is a director, a minister or something. Yes, do you think our Kongming can draw such a picture? There are swindlers all over the place, how can you stay at home comfortably. Do some learning, teach a few students, it can be regarded as a hope project after all, what do you think?" Liu Bei smiled awkwardly and said, "I've heard about Mr. Kong Ming's integrity for a long time, but I didn't expect my wife to be very insightful. I, Liu Bei, never dare to force Mr. Kong Ming to do something. I just come to ask Mr. Kong Ming for advice. Since Mr. Kong Ming is not here, please tell me about it. Greetings from Liu Bei, our brother will come to visit some other day." Turning his head and making a gesture, Guan Yu handed over a bag of presents, and Liu Bei passed it on to his wife, saying, "It's such a small thing, it's not a respect." The lady said: "You are too polite, how dare you!" Liu Bei said: "Hey, it's just a few bags of malted milk and a dozen stockings, which really made my wife laugh. When we win the battle, I will definitely bring the best booty to my wife and leave." The three of them got on their horses and galloped along the stone road.Zhang Fei said: "This girl, you can't trust her words!" Guan Yu said: "Brother, Zhuge Liang is probably hiding in the house and won't come out to see us." When Zhang Fei heard this, he said angrily, "Let me go alone, and I tied him up with a rope. Damn, I don't want to eat a toast. I'm most annoyed by these stinky problems of scholars." Liu Bei waved his hand: "Don't mess around! If you offend Zhuge Liang, our business will not succeed. I think Zhuge Liang probably went to Cao Cao to apply for a job today." Guan Yu was startled: "Huh?" Zhang Fei was puzzled, and said, "Brother, why did we come here for nothing?" Liu Bei smiled secretly and remained silent.The sound of hooves faded away. The moon and stars are rare, and the sound of frogs is heard. Kong Ming led a thin donkey in the dark, and walked home dejectedly. Pushing open the door to see, under the candlelight, the lady is lifting her skirt and trying on stockings.Seeing Kongming's return, Madam hurriedly stepped forward: "Hey, you're back? Why didn't you cough, it's scary! How did the negotiation go?" "Hmph, don't mention it!" Kong Ming sat down, picked up the tea bowl and threw the feather fan aside. "Don't worry, speak slowly." Madam brought a large basin of water, Kong Ming stripped off his gown, and washed it naked. "Damn it, say that my major is wrong, the knowledge structure is unreasonable, and it cannot be directly transformed into productivity!" "Hey? Don't they know your knowledge? You know astronomy, geography, literature, history, philosophy, politics, economics and law. You are proficient in everything, and mathematics, physics and chemistry are also top-notch. Why can't it be transformed into productivity? Didn't you also invent robots? Are you using those wooden oxen and horses for long-distance trafficking? And the Katyusha bow and arrow you invented, which can shoot twenty-four times in a row, how efficient it is in killing people!" "Hey, I've said it all, but they don't care about these in their recruitment conditions. If they get stuck, there are three things: first, you must know a foreign language. Do you think I am so knowledgeable, do I need a foreign language? When I go abroad in the future, I will bring a If you don't translate it, it's fine!" "Yes. What about the second one?" Madam changed the towel for him. "Secondly, I need to be able to type on a computer. Wubi fonts require more than 100 characters per minute. Do you think this is my job? This is all done by odd jobs. A gentleman uses his mouth but not his hands, let me type , what are those uneducated people doing!" "What about the third one?" Madam was a little annoyed. "The third article is the most ignorant. It requires more than five years of practical work experience. Think about it, those who have worked for five years and still go to negotiate, must have not mixed well in the original unit. The more capable masters, generally The more idle you can't come out, as long as you come out, you will be a blockbuster, how can you change jobs in three to five years? But this doesn't make sense to them. That Cao Cao likes to support some job-hopping guys. Apart from traitors, his subordinates are all traitors. Opportunists. Can I share the same pot with these people? I got angry and went back to Wei Wei. Everyone gave out a hot dog at noon. I ate half of it, and left the rest for you to taste. " The lady took a bite: "It's really unpalatable, it's not as good as the bean buns I made!" She threw it on the table casually, "Then if you get angry, you're going to be too late again, aren't you?" "Where is there, don't worry." Kong Ming grabbed the cattail leaf fan to fan his wife, "I don't keep my master here, I have my own place to stay. I plan to visit Sun Quan's place in two days. Is my brother Zhuge Jin there?" Side? Let him be my financial guarantor. As long as Sun Quan tries me out for a few days, he will let me be the governor. Hehe, Cao Cao is an old bastard. Kowtow and beg me to come out of the mountain!" "Liu Bei is here today, and he gave these things as gifts." Madam said, lifting up the hem of her skirt, "Look, does it look good?" "Liu Bei, who sells straw sandals, is of no use. It's better to teach here than to follow him around." Kong Ming picked up Liu Bei's business card from the table and looked at it contemptuously. There are people here, and I will be the fourth in command at most, don't do it." He said and lit his business card on the candle. The sound of horseshoes was crisp, Liu Guanzhang led some servant boys, dismounted in front of the door and knocked on the door.Amidst the sound of music, a group of camera clips: Madam speaks eloquently, Liu Bei is courteous and presents many gifts.Saying goodbye and leaving the house, Madam cheered. Guan Yu immediately asked: "Brother, since you know that Zhuge Liang is not here this time, why do you have to go back and forth in vain?" Liu Bei smiled slightly: "Sun Quan can't accommodate him there, I have paved steps for him here, so that he can happily sneak into my circle!" Under the candlelight, Zhuge Liang was lying on the couch, and his wife beat his back for him, asking him: "Isn't there a guarantee from your brother? Why can't it work?" Kong Ming leaned back and said bitterly: "It was almost successful, but Zhou Yu and Zhou Gongjin suddenly appeared on the way. This stinky boy spat blood in front of Sun Quan, saying that I was captured and released by Cao Cao, and that I was an undercover agent in Soochow. Yes. What else to say, both Sheng Yu and He Shengliang. If there is him but not me, if there is me but not him, keep him and me, third master, you decide! That foolish Sun Quan will kill me as soon as he hears about it. Fortunately, brother Intercede from it, and Zhou Yu's wife, Xiao Qiao, is an old classmate with you, so I came back with my life." The wife said: "He is jealous of you, afraid that you will rob him of his job. Cough, who told you not to leave the mountain early, what are you saying that you are a late bloomer! Now the good jobs are taken by others, you can sleep well all day long in thatched cottage!" "Say sad. Kong Ming got up, took the cattail leaf fan and fanned it for his wife, saying: "Hmph, I don't keep my master here, I have my own place to stay. Now the warlords are fighting and the world is in chaos. Who will be the last to rule the world? I don't believe that I, a thousand-mile horse, can't find Bole! One day, I will make Zhou Yu this You must be so angry!" Madam said: "Or, you can go to Liu Bei's place for a few days. I think Liu Bei is very generous and has everyone's demeanor. People think our donkey is too shabby. He opened his mouth and gave us a big green mule. Those two of his brothers who are dumbfounded must not be able to plot against you. If you are going, you will definitely be able to take power." When Kong Ming heard this, he got up and turned around, raised his eyebrows and said, "Yes, he is the leader of this team, and it won't be long before I will be the leader!" The madam continued: "But I want to be your home!" Kong Ming smiled and said: "Okay, that's it, let's get ready, and when that big-eared thief comes again, we will knock him out immediately!" The sun is shining brightly and the voices are noisy.Wollongong is deserted. There is a team of military academy guards outside the courtyard, strong men and strong horses.People in the surrounding villages pointed and discussed.Several people are pulling banners: "Warmly welcome Mr. Kong Ming to come out of the mountain!" "Liu Bei is a caring person for intellectuals!" "Zhuge Liang, it is bright!" "Wollongong Sandan Association is officially established!" There were hearty chatter and laughter in the courtyard.In the room, Kong Ming and Liu Bei are sitting opposite each other.The lady sat aside, surrounded by piles of presents.Guan and Zhang Shili. Kong Ming said: "The current international situation is like this. Since Dong Zhuo, heroes have risen side by side, and those who have crossed states and counties are innumerable. Compared with Yuan Shao, Cao Cao has few troops and few generals. However, Cao Cao can conquer Shao. It's not just about the right time, it's also about man's plan..." The feather fan shook. Zhang Fei couldn't bear it, and said, "Can you speak more plainly, sir?" Guan Yu gave Zhang Fei a hand, and Liu Bei reprimanded him, "Third brother is ignorant, why don't you apologize to Mr. Kong Ming?" Kong Ming said: "Where? Liu, Guan and Zhang are sworn brothers in Taoyuan. Who in the world doesn't know? How can I, Zhuge Liang, be willing to be sent by Liu, Guan and Zhang at will." Liu Bei rolled his eyes and said, "Mr. Kong Ming is surprised. Liu Bei decided to entrust all important military affairs to Mr. Guan and Zhang. Even Liu Bei himself is willing to lead the horse for you. , bring the contract!" Guan Yu presented the contract.Liu Bei said: "All the officers and men in the army, sir, have the right to kill first and then play. Please sign." Kong Ming read the contract and said, "Then I'd rather be obedient than respectful." He took a pen and signed it. The two looked at each other and laughed, and went out hand in hand.As soon as the door was pushed, the door fell.The two walked out side by side, stepping on the big characters "poor and strong, never falling into the blue clouds" on the door, and the drums and music outside the courtyard played together. A group of people got on their horses and left, followed by the villagers. Several children commented: "Mr. Kong Ming has become a high-ranking official, who will be our teacher in the future?" "I'll be your teacher!" A humble scholar came over, reached out and took off the "Kongming Primary School" plaque, and replaced it with another one, on which was written "Er Zhuge Primary School, Three Immortals".Er Zhuge said: "Today I fully understand that a teacher is the most sacred profession under the sun. It is really one step up to the sky! Why didn't I think of it earlier?" Then he sang a line from the Peking Opera "Empty City Plan": "I was born in Wollongong. people……" The children looked at Erzhuge blankly, and then at the people and horses going away.People cheered and horses neighed, and galloped out of the village, leaving only a silent stone tablet: Wollongong. "I'm originally from Wollongong..." (Er Zhuge is the young scholar who chases the dog in the opening title)