Chapter 12 calm as water.3

I don't know what an electronic analyzer is.I stood for a while watching the brown glass door of the bank open and close again, and the people outside poured in with their necks curled up.I figured that since the bank hadn't exploded, it wouldn't be interesting to stand any longer, so I walked across the street to the other. In 1987, I walked from one street corner to another street corner like this, passing by sundresses, running pants, Lux soap, male treasures, Nescafe coffee, stereos, Italian teak furniture, bonus savings, and sex knowledge promotion column and Cui Jian's "Nothing" and countless other song cassettes.I stop and fold my arms to admire them, but that doesn't mean I like them, I don't like them but I want to study them.One day I met a middle-aged man asking for directions, he said where to go to the funeral home.I said why go to the funeral home? You can go to the New Century Playground.He said I'm not in the mood to play with my mother dead.I said your mother is dead but you are still alive, you can go to the amusement park to ride the roller coaster and taste the weightlessness of the human body.The man looked at me sadly and said. "Don't make fun of the dead, please tell me how to get to the funeral home?" I thought about it and asked him to take the No. 8 bus to Renmin Street Station, and I asked him to walk back a hundred meters and enter the white fence gate on the left.Then I walked from this intersection to the next one. You know that the place I mentioned is actually a maternity hospital.I didn't want to make fun of that sad and angry man, I think he would understand that the way I pointed was the only correct way once he walked into the maternity hospital.People die and are born again, there is nothing special about it.One day I met three girls whistling at me in front of the Oriental Hotel.They put on makeup and wore short skirts to seduce people's hearts with six white lotus-like legs.They pretend to be sophisticated, but when they smile, they show a few immature canine teeth.I also whistled at them, it's not that I can't whistle at them, why don't I whistle?I heard a girl sing to me, "Brother, come here, my little sister has something to say to you." I walked over shaking my shoulders. I think a man must walk shaking his shoulders in front of a girl.The three girls were giggling, and they asked me which of the three was the prettiest, and I said they were all about the same, much prettier than Toad.The three girls were giggling, and the singing one asked me who is the sexiest among the three of us?I said it might be you.She gave a strange cry and said that you are so great and you have good eyesight.I said I'm bigger in bed would you believe me?She laughed wildly, and her short skirt opened like an umbrella.She said, bed?Not on the bed, do you have foreign exchange certificates?I said it can be exchanged for one to one point eight.She said that money can be exchanged for faces but not. I just like people with yellow hair and blue eyes.I said that there is no way, you little bitch licking body odor.I shook my shoulders again and walked forward.Who is that girl who wakes up and calls you his mother?I said to scold you and scold you all over the world.I didn't want to yell at the girl but somehow got away with it.I heard two other girls spit at me: Crazy.Neuropathy.I think this judgment applies to many people.There is a free passage between neurotics and normal people. Many people walk on that road, just like on Zhongying Street in Shatoujiao, Shenzhen. You have no reason to stop that dangerous walking.So am I crazy?I don't think I am, I think if I am crazy, I will take my plastic pistol to Tiananmen Square to direct traffic, let cars fly in the air, let pedestrians walk backwards, let bicycles lift their front wheels like bears and only use the rear wheels to roll .I think my thoughts are really boring, I'd better take advantage of my good time as a normal person and take a few more walks on the street.

(As you walk, you return to the beginning of the story, and you come to the old abandoned train station. It is the place where readers will never forget that bad things often happen.) One day I stood in front of the old train station and saw A big iron sign was raised.The sign reads in red paint: "This station is closed for traffic, and idlers are not allowed to enter!" I have a kind of gloating pleasure in my heart. This feeling comes from my dark memory of the old station. I think of my favorite plastic pistol. It was confiscated here, how is it spoiled now?There is also an umbrella. I wonder which stinky hand is holding my lost umbrella?I pushed the big iron door of the old waiting room with my hand, and the door was ajar.Driven by a certain desire, I went in and pissed on the map of the main railway line on the wall, and when I finished buttoning my trousers contentedly, I suddenly found a person smiling at me.The man was sitting on a prefabricated concrete slab drinking, chewing meaty bones.I immediately recognized him as the station policeman who had detained me. He was drinking happily in the messy ruins alone, red-headed and purple-faced.This kind of extraordinary made me feel very kind to him, and I walked towards him. I walked over with the drunken steps of a standard alcoholic and sat beside him, grabbing the bottle of Yanghe Daqu by the neck.I said to him, "Hello, Uncle Policeman." "Is it good or not, nonsense." He tore off a roasted chicken wing and gave it to me. "There is no distinction between tobacco and alcohol. Drink as much as you want."

"Where's your police uniform?" I said, "Why don't you wear a police uniform?" "Give it up, I'm out of that business, they made me watch this shitty station. I'm a fucking janitor old man." "When the police look at the gate, they are all serving the people." "I serve the people, who will serve me? Roast chicken costs five yuan a catty." He muttered, and then he stared at me suddenly, "Hey , your face is so familiar, are you a pony selling cigarettes?" I thought for a while and said yes, I am a pony selling cigarettes.

"It's over now, the train has nothing and can't bring it here." He sighed, and threw the other roasted chicken wing on the ground, "The gun is gone, the baton is gone, what else can I do? fuck it!" I listened patiently to the old policeman's grievances. I looked at his bright red, wrinkled face. There was a kind of sincere sadness on his face, which made people suddenly feel pity. So I kept pouring wine for him until he was full. With tears in his eyes, he smiled and said to me, "I know you sold cigarettes to the train conductor, but I have never handled your case, I have never handled your case." I said I knew you wanted to Save me, I've made some minor mistakes, but I'm generally a good guy. "I don't care if you are a good person or a bad person, anyway, I take off my white skin to drink, and the wine table is full of friends."

I said yes, our friends are all over the world, and our good wine is everywhere. "How old are you, young man?" "I don't remember. I seem to have lived for a long time, and I'm a little tired." "Don't say that, you are still young, and you won't get tired if you work hard. First mix the party ticket , and then a wife; first a house, then a gas; first a name and then a profit, and when you are seventy years old and a bureau, there will be a car to pick you up. Everyone is the same, as long as you know how to mix, you will not get bored. I'm afraid that you won't be able to play, and you will end up like me, drinking at a bad station. Bah, fuck me!"

I heard his stomach rumbling for a while, followed by a fart.We were silent for a while, recalling the glorious history of the old station.I squinted my eyes in the strong smell of alcohol, and saw that I was sleeping on the bench opposite, and a policeman in white stood beside me and tapped my head with a baton: "Get up, come with me!" This is the city A meeting of one man with another, and I am now sitting with him on the ruins, drinking and drinking with all my heart!You can't tell which kind of meeting is more real, really can't.The more meaningful thing is that when we parted, the old policeman took out an umbrella from the tool box where I was sitting and put it in my left hand, and took out a toy pistol and put it in my right hand.He said that these two things were handed over from the dregs of society before, and they were given to me as a souvenir.

"The weather forecast says it will rain today, so take this umbrella." The old policeman said. "Don't look down on this toy gun. There are many bad guys out there. It's better to have a fake gun than nothing. Take this gun." The old policeman said again. I accepted these two gifts.I knew intuitively that it was something I lost half a year ago, but I didn't say anything.I patted the old policeman on the shoulder and said keep drinking and walked out of the old train station.The sun was shining outside, and there was no sign of rain. The fruit vendors on the square saw me open my umbrella to the sun, and they looked at me in surprise.I understand them, but it has nothing to do with them, I feel like it's raining, I feel sour on my face, I can't take it anymore.

About Thunderbird There was no news from Thunderbird, which made people very worried.What I worry about is not him, but the money I lent him. I regret my chivalrous heart at that time. It is said that the money fell into the bottomless pit when it was in the hands of Thunderbird. The king still has style.Before the National Day, I suddenly received a letter from Thunderbird, with the logo of Luxiang Hotel printed on the top of the envelope. I checked the postmark, and it was from Yinchuan, Ningxia. Li Duo: Hello, first of all, I would like to extend my salute to Manhattan! I waited in Shanghai for three months, but I was unlucky and haven't been able to get a visa yet.The gentlemen at the American consulate were blind. They thought I was a low-level Chinese who wanted to go to the New World to make a fortune.I went to line up at two o'clock in the morning every day, and when I got there, I talked to the consul through a small window like a pharmacy. They asked me about this and that, but they didn't want to hear my thoughts.I could never explain my ambitions to them.Finally they shouted, "Next." I was sent back to my hometown.You don't know how many people are waiting in line for visas. Men, women, old and young are like fleeing famine.One day it rained heavily and there were more people than usual, you know why?Every

Everyone thought that others would not go when it rained, but everyone went.That day I stood and watched, looking at those blue and purple faces that were damaged by the rain, a kind of great sadness seized me, and I stood in the rain and burst into tears.Many people came to comfort me and said don’t be sad and don’t cry. Some people waited for three years to get a visa!I push them away and sit down and cry, fuck you!They weren't mad either, they thought I was crazy.Discuss to call the police.But I will never go crazy when I don't go to America.I waited in Shanghai for three months and met a girl, she is the mysterious girl, you may have heard of it.She was the most attractive girl in the world in my opinion, and I was hooked.I have no way to think about other things for the time being, just want to sleep with her.Now we have flown from Shanghai to Ningxia, then to Inner Mongolia, and then via Lanzhou to take a camel ride on the Silk Road.Besides going to America, this is the second meaningful thing.We love it like crazy.You have no idea how charming the mystery girl is.Now I have opened up a channel to go to the United States through the friend of the mysterious girl. If it goes well, I can fly to New York during the Spring Festival of 1988.As long as I arrive in the United States, I will definitely drive a private jet to pick you up. Please prepare your luggage.

Shake hands!Poet Thunderbird 1987.9.20 I am the ladder manager When I returned to the Sun Building in the evening, I saw a middle-aged woman walking up the front stairs.I noticed that she was looking around, as if she was looking for someone.Who are you looking for when I walk by her?She shook her head and said two words: "Ladder." "Wife?" I said how do you find a wife?She laughed and said again: "Ladder, son. I'm looking for a ladder." It was a thin, short woman, and I noticed that she still had the charm of a young lady.I think a woman looking for a ladder is very strange, it is also reflected in her dazed eyes, and the straw bag in her hand, I just leaned over to see the contents of the bag, there is nothing in the bag , only half a loaf of bread that has been bitten.I didn't talk anymore, I didn't have the energy to meddle in other people's business.Half an hour later I heard someone knocking on my door.I opened the door to find the woman standing in the doorway, her lips moved with difficulty and a smile emerged. "Ladders." "I don't know. I'm not a ladder keeper."

"Can you give me a ladder?" "What do you want a ladder for?" "To the roof." "What do you want to do?" "Nothing, please give me a ladder." "I know what you're up to!" I pushed her and slammed the door.I really don't want to see that woman anymore.I don't understand why those inexplicable people keep pestering me. Do they see that I am their kind?They are really blind. I know who I am, and I don't want anyone to intervene in my life.They want to die or live casually, but don't come to use me as a stepping stone, I am willing to live quietly and freely like this. I was in a bad mood that day, and throughout 1987 I was always in a bad mood.Later, when I lay down and was about to go to bed, I heard the woman's footsteps still lingering in the corridor, heck, heck, heck.She also wears nasty high heels.I get angry when I can't sleep, and I rush out to throw the ladder at her and yell at her, but the hallway is empty, and the electric light dimly shines on a morsel of bread on the ground.Giggle, that woman is going down. "Here's the ladder!" I yelled, but no one answered, my voice startled me. Summary of newspaper headlines on ×month×day I beg your pardon for making the language of these newspapers a section of the story. "China Youth Daily" Issues Concerning Our Youth: Unequal Opportunity Call for reforms to create a level playing field for all Wen Wei Po Mystery of centenarians in Xinjiang revealed The common characteristics of longevity: a good environment, Eat properly, participate in labor, and be optimistic "Xinhua Daily" Strange thing: The director of the industry and commerce bureau is more lively than holding a ceremony in prison "People's Daily" The filming of the large-scale TV series "The Great Wall" is completed "Life Weekly" The Mystery of Zhou Xuan's Inheritance There are different opinions about Zhou Xuan's inheritance dispute. We respect history and facts, and look forward to the sacred law to give a fair answer. "Yangzi Evening News" Murder and robber Yu Shuangge fell into the French Open yesterday "Tonight" The relationship between husband and wife needs adjustment About Thunderbird I remember what a holiday it was, and I had an invitation from a fair lady to a buffet in a place I didn't know.It was dark when I found the place, and a narrow hut was crowded with faces of all kinds.Someone asked my name and said Jiu Yang Jiu Yang nice to meet you.I don't know what he admired me for a long time, anyway, I was hungry, I sat down at the table and reached into the basin, the hostess looked at me lovingly, and handed me a pink tissue. "Toilet paper?" I said, "I don't go to the bathroom." She blushed and said you're a horrible person, you know it's lunch paper.I was full after a few bites.Those so-called cold meals concentrated the most unpalatable foods in China, such as luncheon meat, soybeans, and green beans.I want to say to them, don't fart if you don't have a cock, what kind of buffet?But then again, I am the same, I often open this kind of cold food to fill the stomachs of those bastards.There was no light in the room, just a few candles in the four corners. Everyone was sitting on the ground. The young faces were paler than innocent ghosts in the light of the candles. A boy with long hair and hanging shoulders was holding a guitar and clapping and singing. A hoarse song.I could clearly hear the lyrics, which called for freedom and love. A girl next to him was crying with her hands on her cheeks. I recognized that it was Thunderbird's sad girl.What's annoying is that I blinked at her but she pretended not to see it. She just cared about being sad and didn't want to pay attention to me.I was thinking about Thunderbird, and I heard someone talking about Thunderbird over there.I crawled over and sat down next to a decadent poet, and asked him what happened to Thunderbird? "Dead." The poet made a flying motion, "Totally detached." "Don't talk nonsense. No one dies so easily." I pulled his beard, "Is the Thunderbird in America now?" "He went to Wangchuan without going to the United States. He committed suicide by lying on the train in Beijing." I found that he didn't seem to be joking, but I still don't believe that Thunderbird went to the train instead of going to the United States.I yelled at the man playing the guitar, "Stop the fucking noise, get quiet." He glanced at me and ignored it, click, click, and that's the noise I heard Thunderbird's death over. "Thunderbird cheated a Shanghai girl. He gave the girl two thousand dollars to apply for a visa. After the girl took the money and went back to Shanghai, there was no news. Thunderbird found Shanghai, but was told that the girl had gone to Beijing. Thunderbird found Beijing, and others Tell him to go to the airport quickly, saying that the girl has just bought a plane ticket to Los Angeles, and the girl is going to study abroad at her own expense. Thunderbird rushed into the waiting room, just in time to see the girl walking towards the apron with a suitcase. Thunderbird called me to the girl Fuck you little bitch, girl didn't hear, the people at the airport stopped him outside the security gate. Thunderbird said let me in and she scammed me out of two thousand dollars. The people at the airport said we don't care about liars, we only care about your plane ticket, Ray The bird scolded them, you are also little bitches, you are all fucking liars, and Thunderbird was dragged out by a few policemen and thrown outside the gate of the terminal. When I went to the airport to send someone off, I saw him sitting on the steps and suffering from malaria Trembling all over, I asked him who he was waiting for, and he said he was waiting for the plane. The flight to Los Angeles was half a century late. I said it was half an hour late, but he nodded and said yes, it was half an hour. You see, I was confused .I think a person waiting for an international flight will be dazed with joy. I really didn't expect Thunderbird to have such a sense of humor before he died. After a few days, I heard that he was lying on the rails at Xizhimen." "Lying on the rails just like that Already?" I asked, staring at the poet's scorched lips. "That's it, bloody." The poet turned to me and said in a questioning tone, "You mean Thunderbird should choose another way to die? Take sleeping pills? Cut the vein? Or jump off the building?" I was silent for a while, and suddenly I couldn't Jia shouted in a controlled manner: "It doesn't matter how you die, but how can he pay me back the two thousand yuan he lent me?" i made a game of death In the winter, I was intoxicated in my wild thoughts. You know that the winter of 1987 was very lonely and boring. I always wanted to create a game of bliss. I don’t know what kind of thing can make me happy. I can only practice groping.I once had sex with a like-minded girl in bed all day long, and then my grandpa caught her both out of the house with a cane, and then he hit my ass with the cane, saying you're indecent, I'm worthless I have educated you for twenty years.I said don't hit me, I'm already tired.Did he say he would still do bad things in the future?I said quit, really quit.I'm not kidding old man, I really don't want to make this game because it's too easy.I really can't find anything more exciting. After thinking about it, maybe I should die once for fun. I don't want to die, but I just want to taste the taste of death. Let's die once. I climbed to the top of the Sun Building at dusk, and the city showed a warm orange color in the afterglow of the setting sun. The city is huge, but I was very small. When I stood on the top of the building, I felt that I was pitifully small. There is nothing in the world. A lot of contrast makes your nose sour.I saw the chair with the broken leg standing alone in the afterglow of the setting sun, and I smelled the rotten smell of wood for the first time.The colorful windmill is inserted in the cement gap close to the water tank on the platform. Why does the windmill keep spinning day by day without stopping?Now there is no wind, what is the windmill relying on to rotate?You really can't understand these miraculous things, they torment you, entangle you and make you live in the shadows, I am victimized by them!I went to the chair with the broken leg and looked at it for a while, and I lifted it up vigorously. The chair was surprisingly heavy, and you would never imagine a chair with a broken leg to be so heavy.I held my breath and moved it to the edge of the platform, I pushed it out with a roar, and then I saw the scene of the chair with the broken leg falling rapidly, smashing through the air and hitting the ground with a loud bang when it landed, just like the explosion of the earth At the same time, I heard many windows of the Sun Building being pushed open, mixed with the sound of panic.A woman screamed, "Someone jumped off the building again!" Then I grabbed the windmill. While I was counting the blades of the windmill, a group of people climbed up from the platform opening. They were all residents of the Sun Building.catch him!Don't make him jump!They shouted and rushed towards me, I fell off the windmill and retreated, I don't know why they came to catch me, even if I really want to die, what does it have to do with them?Don't come here, don't come here.In a hurry, I took out a plastic gun from my pocket and pointed it at them, killing whoever came over!They did stop.I realized it was a plastic gun that breathed fire but didn't fire bullets.So I pointed the gun to my forehead.You go home, if you don't leave I will shoot you.At this time, a little boy suddenly yelled, Dad, that's fake, and I have that gun too.The damn little boy exposed his secret at once, they rushed up to hug me, I looked downstairs, I didn't dare to jump down, I pulled the trigger, the plastic pistol sprayed out a ball of flames, my forehead It was hot and hot, and now I died, and I really experienced the feeling of death once. Ending: 1988 For example, cicadas are still singing in the summer of 1988.I completed last year's account in Zizhulin Psychiatric Hospital, and now I am as calm as water. You can believe my experience, or you can not believe it. People outside the hospital have spread a terrible news. They say that Li Duo has suffered from mental illness.I'm Li Duo, but I'm not a mental patient.I am far away from the chaotic world outside now, so I say, calm as water.