Chapter 51 laugh uncle

My elder brother ran away when he was eight years old. There is no news so far. Maybe he fell off a cliff and fell to his death, or maybe he was eaten by a "red-haired dog"-this is what the mountain people call a wolf or a jackal.Misfortunes never come singly. When Xiaohuazi was five years old, she accidentally threw herself into the firepit and burned her face, leaving scars hanging upward on both sides of her mouth. It looked like a frozen smile. He smiles when he is sad, laughs when he is angry, and laughs when he is nervous, so he is called "Xiaohuazi" by everyone.Every time there was no rice for the pot at home, he would cry from hunger, but the more he cried, the more he laughed, as if being hungry was a happy thing.Every time he heard the red-haired dog barking, he hid behind his mother, but the more afraid he was, the more he laughed, as if the beast came and made him overjoyed, and he was about to die from laughing.Once, his father asked him to go down the mountain to buy meat and entertain the bamboo craftsman who came to him.When he came back empty-handed, he probably threw the meat into the valley in a fit of anger.My father didn't ask why, and couldn't find the piece of meat. In a fit of anger, he picked up the pole and wanted to beat it.Unexpectedly, he acted preemptively, and slapped his father to the ground with a stick with a smile. He beat his father to lie on the bed for two days.From then on, whenever my father saw the village cadre, he unfastened his trouser belt to show him the wound on his buttocks.

My father wanted to convince the village cadres that Xiaohuazi was a psychopath and a useless person-their family's difficulties were not exaggerated at all. After Xiaohuazi took that stick, she never went home again. She wandered around the village at the foot of the mountain all day long, and at night she might sleep in the cowshed, in the thatch, or under the eaves.No one knew where he was sleeping, and he couldn't tell with a smile.People say that this is a living treasure, a place of interest in the village, poisonous snakes do not bite it, locusts do not bite it, mosquitoes do not touch it, no matter where it sleeps, it is safe and sound, and it can withstand cold and heat , basically without the trouble of headache and brain fever.

He never messes around.If you want to talk about insanity, it’s just that insanity regards animals as ancestors, setting up mourning halls for animals everywhere, offering a few stones for offerings, burning a little waste paper, kowtowing with your own buttocks, and doing funeral sacrifices in a decent manner.When the toad died, he sacrificed to the toad until the toad stinks.When the chicken died, he sacrificed the chicken until it stinks. Once, the owner of the chicken smashed his altar, and just kicked a few of his stones away. He was so angry that he yelled, and threw a stone at random, smashing the opponent's head and blood.

After the news spread, no one dared to provoke him again. He wears men's or women's Baijia clothes and big or small Baijia shoes. He often wanders on the road, always smiling when he sees people.When he is happiest, of course, there are weddings and weddings in the village.Where firecrackers or gongs and drums sound, his figure is indispensable.However, he doesn't beg or make troubles. He just sits far away on the steps and looks at the crowds of men, women and children with a happy face.Someone took pity on him and gave him something to eat.Fearing that he would cause trouble, the master would send him away with some meat or rice cakes—of course, this was a good time for him to feast.

At the wedding of a certain house in Meidong, he behaved a little abnormally. He didn’t leave after eating meat and rice cakes, and he didn’t leave after getting an old sweater. He just ran wildly on the ground in a panic, whining. screaming, shaking a broken umbrella that I don't know where to pick up. "Why are you crazy?" The master thought he was annoying and pushed him away.But he turned back after running far away, still running wildly and screaming. The heavy rain is coming soon, and all the guests of Hexi are unable to move.Motorcycles and cars got stuck in the mud one by one, or blocked on the collapsed road.Someone just remembered Xiaohuazi's noise not long ago, and his movement of shaking the broken umbrella-couldn't this idiot report the rain to everyone?

Later, some people noticed that every time before the heavy rain came, Xiaohuazi would shake a broken umbrella, which was more effective than the weather station. He was also the first to notice the fire.One day in the twelfth lunar month, he suddenly appeared at the door of the village chief's house, holding a pine tree in his hand, and beat it here and there, not knowing what it meant. "Xiaohuazi, drive away the mosquitoes in my house?" He glanced at the village chief, but he didn't stop his beating. "I don't have a treat at home today, and I don't have meat rice for you! Do you understand?"

Still silent, he ran to the back of the house and beat him. The village chief knew that this guy was a bit supernatural, so he couldn't help feeling suspicious. He looked around and saw nothing, but he gave up the idea of ​​going out into the city.About half an hour later, the county called an emergency call to inform that there was a fire in the north of the mountain, and it was urgent to organize manpower here to cut out the isolation zone to prevent the spread of the mountain fire.Fortunately, the village chief didn't go out that day. He turned on the radio, and as soon as he shouted, dozens of people went up the mountain with hatchets. Compared with the firefighting teams in several other towns, they were the first group to arrive at the scene.

The village head later bought two sugar buns for Xiaohuazi, and said to everyone: "You are not allowed to call him Xiaohuazi in the future, you should call him Mr. Xiao, do you hear me? It is not because of Mr. Xiao, the trees on your mountain have turned to ashes!" " The village chief said again: "Don't provoke him in the future." Since then, Mr. Xiao has become more confident and more fanciful in offering sacrifices to animals.He sacrificed toads until the toads stink; he sacrificed chickens until the chickens stink.He also offered sacrifices to rats, crows, cauliflower snakes, leeches, and ground silkworms. He thumped his forehead in front of these messy corpses, smiling sadly, and even grinning viciously—this is a sad distortion. When the face is revealed.