Chapter 19 Chapter 6 Put this one first

Here we are talking about Mr. Nuoxi.This gentleman—oh, I remember, someone said that no rabbit should be called a gentleman anymore, because we can't just blaspheme these respectable gentlemen who have the same power as the state officials, and put these gentlemen's It's wrong to call a rabbit that name.In fact, why do we call a cat a cat, a dog a dog, and a person as a slave and a master, and give the concepts of insult and respect to each name? I don't quite understand.A rabbit is not worthy of being called a gentleman. At first I thought maybe it was because the fur was not white or the ears were too big.Only later will I know that I will not swear or tell lies, I will not teach Buddhism, I will not meditate, I will not kowtow in front of Jigong Bodhisattva, I will not form despicable and vicious cliques for personal gain, I will not smoke opium, and I will not borrow various titles. Gaining money and fame is why a rabbit cannot be called a gentleman.That being the case, I think Mr. Nuoxi will let us be called "Rabbit, or Mr. Nuoxi" in the future.

I'll make a bet he won't care too much.Because if you only want a decent name, Mr. Nuoxi can't do the Chinese gentleman's behavior that he can't do.Let's talk about this rabbit now, let Chinese gentlemen become all gentlemen. This rabbit wakes up in the Fuling Hotel and misses Alice, is it like an ordinary rabbit running around in panic when it loses its companion?I think everyone would like to understand. He doesn't.I am talking about Mr. Nuoxi, he is not.It is very common for a person to leave his companions and go as soon as he thinks of going without asking whether there is any prior explanation.As for leaving for an unexpected event, for example, an unintended sudden change, then there is no need to panic. The reason is that "there are always changes like that".This means that what goes suddenly also comes suddenly.The Chinese people firmly believe that Yin and Yang are equal anyway, and foreigners who have been there for a long time can also understand this philosophy, so Mr. Nuoxi is not at ease.In order to hope that Miss Alice would come back suddenly, Mr. Nuoxi stayed in Fuling Hotel alone without caring.

As for the owner of the hotel, he naturally didn't think it was a strange thing.They were all able to recite the regulations of the hotel industry in the concession five times forward and three times backwards, without missing a single word.Alice's refusal will not affect the rent, it is stipulated in the charter.If it hadn't been for Mr. Nuoxi who should go to the cabinet to sue, Alice would not eat food for half a year, and after that, the bill would still be counted together, and Mr. Nuoxi could not amend the regulations and say that he would not admit it.That Er Niu (that is, the Er Niu who said that the lower-class Chinese have two names and the upper-class Chinese have five names), suddenly left the Fuling Hotel after seeing Alice, and spoke with his conscience that he was afraid that the tip would not be enough. When opening breakfast for Mr. Nuoxi, he spoke to Mr. Nuoxi.

The two cows took back a plate of salted liver (because Mr. Nuoxi still didn't forget the last experience, he no longer wanted to have salted meat on the table), and when Mr. Nuoxi said that it was "the last time I met Ali Ms. Si...", and repeatedly answered "Yes, yes, tell the kitchen not to use cured meat" and asked about Miss Alice's whereabouts in a respectful reply.Hearing that Mr. Nuoxi said he didn't know, Er Niu was startled. "Is she not coming?" "Who knows?" But Mr. Nuoxi immediately saw Erniu's disappointment, and continued, "Since I know I'm still waiting here, she will come."

"I think, too, that Miss Alice will be back soon." "You guessed right." "But, I'll ask the living fairy to tell us the direction where Miss Alice is going. What do you think, sir?" Mr. Nuoxi did not forget the absurdity of the divination made by the living god on the day he bought the tea bowl last time, and he couldn't bear to make the well-meaning Er Niutou sad, so he said that if he really didn't hear from Miss Alice in two days, he would go to ask the living god again Not too late.But after the arrival, the two cows did not let Mr. Nuoxi know, and still went to the fairy to divination a subject in the direction of Miss Alice, and by the way, asked whether the reward number had failed.Although it cost 30 cents, it goes without saying that Erniu can get fifty times more hope than the class money from these nonsense.But there is no need to say more about this matter. The Chinese people in Hengshun make transactions with gods, Bodhisattvas, Guan Shengdijun, and land elders. It is always the same as buying a lottery ticket. Yes, but after paying the money, the money can always be magnified by a thousand or ten thousand times, and it will fall on the head out of thin air.Moreover, the credit of Caili is not as good as that of some receipts, which has long been believed by most Chinese people.

After eating, Mr. Nuoxi was still in his room.Recently, he has gradually felt that sitting on a Chinese style chair is more beneficial than a sofa.This taste is developed slowly, just like other things.He himself did not understand that Chinese people like to wear western clothes, which is not necessarily more comfortable and convenient than wearing long coats.However, there are quite a few young people who resolutely put on foreign clothes, bravely endure the test of severe winter and great heat, and take the opportunity to blush when they cannot speak foreign language. This is naturally more admirable than Mr. Nuoxi .Therefore, we don’t need to add much praise and doubts to Mr. Nuoxi’s understanding of Chinese life. For a smarter person in China, he will never have to experience European thoughts and behaviors twice before he believes that he is right, and he doesn’t need to experiment before he thinks it is right!

Since it is said that Mr. Nuoxi has discovered the benefits of the Grand Master's chair, he is seated on this red sandalwood inlaid marble chair.For the sake of Miss Alice’s visit, I don’t know how long, and let Mr. Nuoxi read a book in her place. If you are tired of reading, you can lie down on the table and take a nap. If you wake up from a nap, you can read a book again. It’s okay to do so. no.We should believe that Mr. Nuoxi will not get tired of Taishi chairs before the Chinese get tired of foreign clothes.But if we are not very forgetful, we can remember that Mr. Nuoxi came to China for a trip. If sitting on the chair and reading "China Travel Guide" counts as life, then this life can be obtained at Mr. Habu, and there is no need to go far I have come to China Poria Hotel from a thousand miles away.In fact, Mr. Nuoxi should go out.

Our readers may still remember the opinions of Miss Yibin and Miss Alice.At least that was Alice's opinion. She thought that Mr. Nuoxi could not go with her, nor should he stay sick at the Poria Hotel, and it would be better to spend his time in the park.It is of course very legitimate to travel to China and go to the places where the upper classes in China hang out.But the embarrassment is that the park is full of Chinese high-class people, and the three characters of high-class people mean "gentleman". If you put a rabbit among the gentlemen, even if Mr. Nuoxi sees a person, he claims to be just a small town in Scotland. Rabbit on it, but will this work?Unfortunately, Mr. Nuoxi has a pair of ears and grew up so recklessly.Although the fox's tail is long, it can be folded and stuffed into its trousers. A monkey can wear a mantle and it will be fine. As long as other animals can talk, wear clothes, cry, and go to the toilet , it is not easy to see, as for the rabbit, can anyone think of a way to tidy up its ears other than cutting them off with a knife?

As a matter of fact, however nice the park was, and however suitable it was for Mr. Nosh, and enough to keep Miss Alice from worrying about Mr. Nosh staying alone in the hotel, it was impossible to go to the park. Mr. Nuoxi really still has places to go, China is so big!Thousands and tens of thousands of Japanese migrated to China, and they sent tens of thousands of troops to occupy China, but the Chinese officials did not speak up, and many Chinese people did not know about it.There are some civilians without knives and guns whose land and houses have been occupied, and they honestly move to a new place to live, obeying the government's advice, and never conflict with the expatriates. If China is not very large, this cannot be done.What's more, besides Japan, there are Britain, France, and... In short, China is no different from other countries.If we believe some scientific idiots, Japan will sink into the sea one day, then all the citizens of Japan should be notified in advance.Either notify afterwards, or not notify at all, once you move to China, it goes without saying that you can choose the best place in China to build your capital.Even all countries can do this, and there is always enough distribution in China.At that time, of course, all the restless Chinese youths will be killed, and there will be no need for Chinese government officials to use martial law to stop the anti-Japanese and anti-British movements, and the diplomatic relations will not worry about being strengthened.All officials who are Chinese officials can also be foreign officials. The rest of China are the Chinese upper class who are very polite, tolerant, and faithful, and the common people who take the government's opinion as their opinion.

Foreigners in China are all familiar with Chinese culture, Chinese art, and China's vast land and resources. "The land is vast and the resources are abundant", in the eyes of sensible and knowledgeable people in China, it is always a saying that can be boasted to the world no matter what! Since China is so vast, we certainly don't suspect that Mr. Nuoxi can do nothing but hang out among the park gentlemen like other foreigners, so let Mr. Nuoxi get to know more gray storks, or have a conversation with duck sister Chat, listen to the philosophy of a fat Nanjing female duck, and visit various prisons and factories (to understand the difference between prisons and factories, because the difference is not easy to understand without first being told ).Otherwise, give a speech as welcome as others, whether in prose or rhyme, remember the rules in the travel guide, and praise the Chinese casually during the speech, for example, "Very brave in war", "The government treats young people very well." "Get the Fa", "a good culture and a better disposition", you don't have to worry about being unpopular the second time around.When it comes to speaking engagements, the opportunity presents itself.It happened that Mr. Nuoxi received an invitation that day, asking him to give a speech at the Society of Those Birds.

Mr. Nuoxi took the post from the copper plate in the hands of Er Niu, cut it open, and read on the post: Dear Dr. Nuoxi: We use 101 points of sincerity, 50 points of respect, and 40 points of respect. Twelve and a half hopes, you are welcome to come to our meeting to give a speech, please don't refuse any one of you.All 571 of our members here are eager to see the doctor, listen to the doctor, cough and sneeze, and look forward to it with the sincerity of a state official begging for rain.Please take pity on us.We also invited an officer to interview Dr. Ken, who is a talented person in our association. It is indeed a lifetime honor for the other 570 eager members to honor him and talk to you. After the arrival is the date, the name and location of the society, and don't forget to write "Fruit refreshments are also available" according to Chinese rules.It was the first time that Mr. Nuoxi was called a doctor, and he always felt uncomfortable. In fact, Caucasians are not as good as Chinese people.As for the Chinese, it is very generous to call themselves "doctor", "celebrity", or other more pleasant names.Inviting people to give speeches is even more necessary. Everyone knows that if the address is too rude, they will not come.Mr. Nuoxi, who didn't know much about the situation in China, suspected or invited another Dr. Nuoxi. It happened that this doctor also lived in this hotel, so he turned to the cover of the invitation again. How could it be wrong? Others wrote it so clearly that they didn't even forget the number in the room! Seeing that Mr. Nuoxi was hesitant, Er Niu bowed and said, Miss Alice also has one, because Miss Alice hasn't come back yet, so she put it on the cabinet. "Then take a look!" Er Niu went. Giving the honorary title of a doctor to a rabbit seems to be ridiculed at the same time as those big figures whose minds are full of philosophy, economics, medicine, theory, political thought, and national law.However, the one who drafted this invitation was a famous scholar, who knew very well how to assign certain titles to certain people, but for a foreign rabbit, or a horse from a circus troupe from a foreign country, he thought it would be a collective name. Good for Dr. Er Niu brought Miss Alice's invitation, needless to say, it started with "Dr....".He understands that it will not be sent by mistake, so it is strange.A person is called a "doctor", "a man of lofty ideals", or a "revolutionary party" for no reason by another kind of person, and he is praised or killed according to his own interests. What's more, it's just a rabbit born in a small town in Scotland, who is kindly called a doctor, how can he deny it! Let's talk about what happened after a quarter past one. Er Niu came in with a business card on a small copper plate.Mr. Nuoxi looked at the business card and knew that this was an important person of the society, so he hurriedly said please go to the small living room.In just one minute, they shook hands on the gorgeous, three-inch-thick carpet painted by bear mothers eating children. Mr. Nuoxi gave the visitor a seat before he had time to sit. The visitor first estimated Mr. Nuoxi's ears in his heart.Using the example mentioned in "Mai Xiangfa", I think that at least one hundred years of life can be lived, and five sons can be born.After secretly admiring it, he said a sentence that had been prepared for a long time in his heart like a composition. "I am very happy today. I can see Mr. Nuoxi's face clearly in front of Mr. Nuoxi, who I have admired all my life—" He even wanted to say that even the hair on his face is very clear. There is an idiom "you can see the fine hairs", but remembering that it would be impolite to say the hairs to the rabbit, I am afraid that Mr. Nuoxi can't understand the meaning of this sentence, so he won't say it anymore. Mr. Nuoxi felt very interesting about this unfinished sentence.It is the first time I have heard such a long sentence without any grammatical confusion, and I can say it in one breath without pausing.The person who said this was also an upper-class person, which made Mr. Nuoxi respect the self-cultivation of Chinese upper-class people again. Mr. Nuoxi said: "What Mr. said is very good, it's the first time I've heard it." So the visitor said another long story.He said: "My boy was as happy as eating ginseng fruit when he heard my husband say that! Oh, I'm as happy as eating ginseng fruit after picking up eight treasures!" Needless to say, there is no difference in grammar.Mr. Nuoxi understood that this was a learned person, and remembering the scene where some celebrities asked and answered each other in rhyme during Miss Alice's welcome party for Dr. Starling, he said: Mr.'s words are very pleasant to listen to, and Mr. Nuoxi was surprised by his genius. . The guest answered casually, using rhyme very naturally, without losing his representative eloquence.This made Mr. Nuoxi embarrassed to speak in rhyme again.The visitor immediately talked about how he hoped that Mr. Nuoxi would go to the meeting, and used a long sentence of thirty-one characters. At first, Mr. Nuoxi wanted to be called a doctor out of thin air, but he himself did not have the knowledge of a doctor, so he didn't dare to go.After some encouragement from the visitor, he agreed. The visitor asked Miss Alice again, and said that he would like to see the lady very much.He also said that he had heard from the gray stork, from the larks, and from many birds, that Miss Alice was a lovely, kind person.After Mr. Nuoxi told him that the lady had gone out, the guest wrote a long prose on this little disappointment, thirty-seven characters, and the words and phrases could make people believe that she was from the National Academy. We don't need to look at diplomas, this alone is the guarantee of a highest institution of learning. Seeing that the host did not show signs of chasing the guests, the visitor pressed his butt against the chair, and talked to Mr. Nuoxi about everything in extremely sensible and intelligent spoken language.Mr. Nuoxi, because he was talking about the meeting with the visitor, talked about...remembering the gray stork, remembering the duck, he asked the visitor if he knew the current situation of the little duck. "The most pitiful person in the world is to hope that a love upper body will end up being a helpless ugly duck!" He was afraid that the exclamation mark could not express his sympathy, but he understood it according to the rules of the academy, and added later when he talked about it. The last word "yo" that is never found in ordinary Chinese.He said "Yo", of course Mr. Nuoxi couldn't point out this mistake. Although he could hear it, he thought it might be a habit of new Chinese grammar. "It's just familiar—haha, I'm using the words of classicism. This is the grammar of a rotten Confucian in Shandong Province thousands of years ago. Yes, Mr. Nuoxi, you basically understand this, so you don’t need to explain. I’m not just talking about being familiar with this ugly duck, I’m really afraid of her!” "Is this duck scary?" "Who can be afraid of a duck? Mr. Nuoxi. In our lives, the hounds are the scary thing—no, I didn't say 'we', only me, walking with my brother, only saw the hounds Just run away! In short, I shouldn’t be afraid of a duck, just like I shouldn’t be afraid of you who are kind, polite, and… why should I see what I admire, admire, and hope for the best in my life? Good people say 'scared'? I will never. But my dearest Mr. Nuoxi, who is the most fascinating and can understand others, I am afraid that the duck will say that he loves me! I remember, I was in a Shandong shop on Eel Street once After eating fried noodles, when I went out, a very vicious dog stopped my way and said 'I want to bite you', which made me more frightened than the little duck saying 'I love you'! Mr. Nuoxi, you I always understand the nature of 'love you' and 'bite you', but I'm afraid to let that duck whisper love in my ear. I can't analyze this feeling, but I swear it's the truth!" Mr. Nuoxi totally believed it.From the color, from the tone, it can be seen that the talents of this Academy are not deceitful.But it is not easy to understand the reason for this fear, because it is unreasonable. "Can you simply tell me the reason why you are afraid of her?" Mr. Nuoxi is also gradually able to speak very long Chinese, and he is very happy. Then the guest counted out twenty very legitimate reasons, saying how inappropriate, how inappropriate, how far apart in temperament, how different the family is, and why they are afraid when they come, there is only one thing, fear. She is ugly. "Consider what a monstrous and grotesque nonsense this is! If it is added to the lineage of my children and grandchildren that there is a duckling who is the wife of such and such a certain family, sir, isn't this deliberately leaving a joke for future generations to tell as a kind of story?And..." Mr. Nuoxi was very satisfied with the visitor, but he said that he was afraid of this because of his ugly face. He knew that this person from the academy was just taking a practice lesson on rhetoric here, and he didn't mean to say Seriously, so I soon served tea to see off guests, and stopped listening to his long sentences of thirty or forty characters. The visitor was a goose, and because he was seeing Mr. Nuoxi, he hid his pride, but when it came to ducks, he couldn't hide it anymore. As for how Mr. Nuoxi will go to the meeting in the future and how he will pass the time, I don't need to talk about it for the time being.If you want to give speeches for the welcome of Chinese society, you can say whatever you want.If you make a mistake, no one will dare to correct it.What they listen to is not the time to listen to the second person to correct them.A mule returning from the West can still talk nonsense in lectures, talking about literature, philosophy, doctrines and ideas, let alone a pure Western celebrity with brand-new clothes and a dignified appearance.As long as it doesn't make Mr. Nuoxi's headache and social difficulties difficult, it goes without saying that Mr. Nuoxi will not learn to relax for all China and have to spend all his time bored in the hotel until Miss Alice returns.