Chapter 6 Chapter Six

Ding Gou'er felt that the gate of hell with golden corners opened with a rumbling noise.He was surprised to find that hell is not as dark and dull as in the legend, but resplendent and magnificent.The red sun and blue moon radiate light at the same time.Groups of armored, gaudy-striped sea creatures with soft arms swam around his wobbly body.He felt a colorful fish with a sharp snout gently pecking at his hemorrhoids, removing those corrupt tissues, like a doctor in an anorectal hospital, quickly performing an operation.The butterfly of consciousness that had been out of the body for a long time got into his head, and he felt that his mind was cold.The special scout, who had been intoxicated for a long time, opened his eyes and saw the female driver sitting naked beside him, wiping her body with a car-cleaning silk cotton stained with a sour liquid.He found himself naked too.Lie down on the gleaming teak floor.Things from the past slowly came to mind.He tried to get up, but couldn't.The female driver wiped her breasts carefully, with a focused expression, as if there was no one else around, like a mother preparing to nurse her child.Gradually, crystal tears filled her eyes and merged into two streams, flowing down slowly.A sacred feeling rose from the bottom of the scout's heart.He wanted to speak, but the female driver rushed forward and blocked his mouth with her lips.Then he felt groups of fish floating in the air, and the air was full of fishy smell.He felt the vigorous alcohol in his body pouring into her body.he woke up.She groaned strangely and collapsed on the ground.

The scout got up staggeringly, dizzy, and held on to the wall to keep from falling.He felt unprecedentedly weak, his internal organs were empty, and only a piece of skin remained.The female driver was covered with snow-white steam, like a steamed fish just out of the pan.After the steam passed, clear sweat overflowed from her body and flowed on the floor.She was unconscious and very pitiful.Compassion grows rapidly like a poisonous weed, but her viciousness also makes the scouts unforgettable.Ding Gou'er wanted to let her piss all over her body like a wild beast, so she gave up her evil thoughts.Think of diamonds, think of the sacred mission, grit your teeth, go!Sleeping with your wife is a matter of life style, and you are a heinous sin for cooking babies.He looked at the female driver and felt that she was a diamond target.I have penetrated the meat target, and the bullet of justice continues to fly.He opened the closet and chose a navy blue woolen suit to wear on his body.The clothes fit well, as if they had been cut to measure his figure.He thought, I slept with your woman, wore your clothes, and finally killed you.He found a pistol from his dirty clothes and put it in his pocket.I opened the refrigerator and ate a cucumber.I took a big sip of Changyu wine.The wine is smooth, like the skin of a beautiful woman.Just as he was about to leave, the female driver got up from the ground, knelt down on the ground, and propped up her hands, like a frog, like a baby.There was a pitiful look in her eyes.He suddenly thought of his son, and his father's love flooded his heart.He walked over, bent down and touched her head.Say, "Baby, poor baby."

She put her arms around his legs and looked at him tenderly. He said, "I'm leaving, and I won't let your husband go." She said: "Take me away. I hate him, I help you. They eat babies." She stood up, dressed in a hurry, and took out a bottle from the cabinet, which contained some burnt yellow powder."Do you know what this is?" she asked. The scout shook his head. She said: "This is baby powder, a great supplement, and they all eat it." The scout asked: "How to make it?" She said: "It was made by the special nutrition department of the city hospital."

"living?" "I'm alive, and I'm crying." "Go, go to the hospital." She took a kitchen knife from the kitchen and held it in her hand. He smiled, grabbed the kitchen knife and threw it on the table. The female driver suddenly let out a crisp laughter of "Ge Ge", like a hen that has just laid eggs, like a wooden wheeled cart rolling on the stone road.Laughing, like a bat, she jumped on him again.Her soft arms wrapped around his neck, her equally soft legs curled around his hipbones.With great effort he tore her from him.And she pounced on it again and again, like an inescapable nightmare.Scout jumped around, dodging her attacks like an old monkey.He said out of breath, "If you dare to rush around again, I will kill you!"

She stared blankly at him for a while, then suddenly yelled hysterically: "You kill me! Kill me, you ungrateful thing, kill me!" She tore the clothes on her chest, a purple plexiglass button bullet shot out, and landed crisply on the floor, rolling like a small animal, rolling from east to west, from west to east, Knowing what power is so lingering, the attraction of the earth and the friction of the floor seem to be helpless.The scout stomped on it resentfully, and felt it tickle under his feet, through the socks and thick leather soles. "Who the hell are you? Diamond instructed you to do this, right?" The nostalgia for her because of the skin-to-skin contact gradually disappeared from the scout's heart, and the soft heart began to harden, and gradually took on the color of steel , he said coldly, "So you are their accomplice and also ate babies. Diamond Diamond instructed you to entangle me and sabotage my investigation."

"I'm an unfortunate woman..." She began to cry, really crying, tears profusely, her shoulders twitched, "I've been pregnant five times, and every time I was five months pregnant, he sent me to the hospital for an abortion ...The child that flowed down was eaten by him..." She was distraught, shaking, looking about to stand up, the scout hurriedly stretched out her hand, she threw herself into his arms, touched his neck with her mouth, sucked it lightly, and then bit it hard.The scout let out a strange cry and punched her in the stomach.She was beaten until she croaked like a frog, and fell on her back.Her teeth were sharp, Ding Gou'er had already experienced it.He touched his neck with his hand, and his fingers were stained with blood.She lay there with her eyes open.The scout walked away.She rolled and rushed over.Oh, brother, brother, don't throw me away, I kiss you... The scout had an idea, pulled a nylon rope from the balcony, and tied her to the chair.She struggled with her hands and kicks, shouting: "A heartless thief! I'll kill you! I'll kill you!"

The scout took out a handkerchief, strangled her mouth, and tied a knot at the back of her neck.Then, as if fleeing for his life, he left the female driver's house and slammed the door loudly.He vaguely heard the rattling sound of the chair legs hitting the floor, fearing that the difficult female robber would chase out with the chair, he ran fast, the cement steps slapping, the sound was deafening.He remembered that the floor of the female driver's house was very low, but the stairs turned around, as if leading to hell.At a bend, he collided with an old woman who was running quickly towards the stairs.He felt that her bloated belly was like a leather bag filled with liquid, with almost no elasticity but a strong sense of fluidity.Then he saw her flailing her stubby arms and falling down the stairs.Her face was very large and very white, like a Chinese cabbage that had been stored for half a winter.The scout secretly groaned, a cluster of poisonous mushrooms suddenly grew in his mind.He jumped onto the flat ground at the turning of the stairs, and hastily reached out to help the old man.She yelled with her eyes closed, her voice turned and bleak.Scouts feel guilty.He bent down, grabbed her waist with both hands, and pulled her up. Her body was heavy, not to mention rolling, so tired that the blood vessels on the scout's head might explode at any time, and the neck bitten by the female driver was like a needle. Same pain.Later, thanks to the cooperation of the old woman who put her arms around his neck, he pulled her up.Her sticky fingers were grabbing the wound on his neck, causing him to break out in a cold sweat.He smelled rotting apples coming out of her mouth.He couldn't bear the smell, so he let go, and the old woman slumped on the stairs, like a trembling sack of mung bean jelly, but her hands firmly grabbed his pants.He saw a dozen shiny fish scales on her hands.Two live fish packed in plastic bags—a crucian carp and an eel—wrecked free. The crucian carp bent its body and jumped wildly on the steps, while the eel had a yellow face, blue eyes, and two steel wires The same beard, crawling furtively and awkwardly.The water in the plastic bag trickled down slowly, wetting one step and then two steps.He heard himself ask dryly: "Old lady, are you important?"

The old woman said: "My waist is broken, and my intestines are also broken." Hearing the old woman report the injury so accurately, the scout knew that endless troubles had once again landed on his unlucky head.Even more unlucky than that crucian carp, and of course not as good as that eel.For a moment, he wanted to break away from the old woman and run away, but he bent down and said, "Old lady, let me carry you to the hospital!" "My leg was broken and my kidney was seriously injured," said the old woman. He felt a foul gas swell in his belly.The crucian carp jumped onto his feet, and he flew, the crucian carp flew up and hit the iron railing of the stairs.

"You pay me for the fish!" He stomped the eel that swam over again, and said, "I'll carry you to the hospital!" The old woman put her arms around his legs and said, "Don't think about it!" He said, "Ma'am, your waist is broken, your legs are broken, your intestines are broken, and your kidneys are broken. Why don't you go to the hospital and wait to die here?" "If I die, I will drag you to the bottom!" The old woman said firmly.As he spoke, he felt the strength in her hands. The scout sighed in despair.He looked at the stairs, at the dying crucian carp and eel, at the gray sky beyond the broken glass, not knowing what to do.A strong smell of distiller's grains poured in from the outside, and there was the sound of Dangdu beating the iron sheet.He felt cold all over and wanted a drink very badly.

At this time, a sneer came from him and the old woman.With the rattling of heels, the female driver straightened her body, with a chair behind her, and walked down the stairs in small steps. He smiled awkwardly at her.Her appearance didn't make him feel scared, and even felt a little relieved.It's better to be haunted by a young woman than to be haunted by an old woman, he thought, so he smiled.It is easy to smile, as if a sun of hope is exposed in the hazy sky of despair.Seeing that she had bitten off the handkerchief that strangled her mouth, he couldn't help admiring the sharpness of her teeth even more.Because of the chair strapped to her body, she walked very slowly.When going down the steps, the back legs of the chair bumped against the edge of the steps.He nodded at her.She nodded at him too.She stopped beside the old woman, swayed her body, and threw the chair onto the old woman like a tiger wagging its tail. He heard her say viciously, "Let go!"

The old woman looked up at her and muttered something as if she were cursing, but she let go of her hands.The scout immediately took a few steps back and distanced himself from the old woman. She said to the old woman, "Do you know who he is?" The old woman shook her head. "He's the mayor!" The old woman hurriedly got up, holding on to the railing of the stairs, trembling all over. The scout couldn't bear it, and hurriedly said, "Ma'am, I'll take you to the hospital for an examination." The female driver said: "You give me a loose bang." He untied her.The chair fell to the ground.She moves her arms.The scout turned and ran.He heard her running after him. When the scout ran out of the opening of the building, his clothes were caught on the bicycle parked there.The bicycle fell over with a "squeak" and his clothes were torn. The female driver threw a rope from behind and wrapped it around his neck.As soon as she tightened the rope, his breathing tensed immediately. She led him out of the building, like leading a dog or some other animal.The sky was drizzling, which wet his eyelids and made his eyes hazy.He held the rope with his hands to keep from being strangled.A round object flew past him, startling him, and then he saw a half-grown boy with a bald head, wet and muddy, running after his football.He tilted his head and begged for mercy: "Little aunt, let me go, let people see, how ugly..." She snapped the rope, and the buckle tightened immediately, and she said, "Can't you run?" "Don't run, don't run, don't run to die." "You swear not to get rid of me, let me follow you." "I swear, I swear." She let go of the rope, and just as the scout was about to get angry, he heard a beautiful melody from the mouth on her gentle face: "You, a whole hairy child, without me protecting you, anyone can bully you." The scout's heart trembled, and warm feelings swirled in his stomach. He felt happiness falling down like drizzle, not only wet his eyelids, but also wet his eyeballs. The drizzle is falling, weaving a soft and dense net, covering buildings, trees and everything.He felt her reach out one hand to hold his arm, and heard a crisp sound, and a pink folding umbrella bounced off her other hand, lifted it up, and covered his head.He naturally put his arms around her waist and grabbed the umbrella, like a conscientious, considerate and gentle husband.He couldn't figure out where the umbrella came from, and was full of suspicion.But this suspicion was immediately crowded out by a feeling of happiness. The sky was overcast, and it was hard to tell whether it was morning or afternoon.His watch was stolen by the goblin long ago, and the time was lost.The drizzle hit the soft umbrella cloth, making a small sound.This voice is sweet and sad, like the famous white wine of Gamber, lingering and worrying.He tightened his arms around her waist, through the thin silk pajamas, his hands felt her skin was cool, and her stomach was wriggling warmly.They cuddled up and walked on the narrow concrete road of the Brewing University. The leaves of the holly trees on the side of the road were shining, like the orange nail polish on the nails of a beautiful woman.The tall coal piles on the coal yard are steaming with milky white hot air, exuding the smell of burnt coal.The ferocious black smoke from the tall chimneys was pressed down by the air and turned into oolongs, hovering and entangled in the low altitude. In this way, they walked out of the brewing university and walked along the willow-shaded road beside the steaming white steam and the smell of wine.The drooping wicker flicked the nylon silk surface of the umbrella from time to time, and large raindrops fell from the edge of the umbrella.The road was covered with a layer of wet, golden-yellow dead leaves.The scout suddenly closed the umbrella, looked at the black and blue wicker, and asked, "How long have I been in the wine country?" The female driver said: "You ask me, who should I ask?" The scout said: "No, I have to start working immediately." She twitched the corners of her mouth and mocked: "Without me, you can't investigate anything!" "What's your name?" "You bastard," she said, "you're nothing. You've slept with me, and you still don't know my name." "Sorry," he said, "I asked you and you didn't tell me." "You didn't ask me." "I asked." "No question," she said, kicking him, "no question." "I didn't ask, I didn't ask, now I ask, how about it?" "Don't ask," she said, "you're Hunter, I'm McCall, we're partners, how about that?" "Good partner," he said, patting her waist, "where do you think we should go?" "What do you want to investigate?" "The crime of killing and eating babies by a group of scum headed by your husband." "I'll take you to find someone who knows everything about Jiuguo City." "Who?" "You kissed me and said..." He lightly kissed her cheek. "I'll take you to Yu Yichi, the owner of Yichi Hotel." When they hugged each other and walked to Donkey Street, it was already dark. With the unique feeling of creatures, the scout knew that the sun had set, no, it was setting.He tried his best to imagine the magnificent scene at dusk: a huge red sun fell helplessly to the ground, radiating thousands of rays of light, on the houses, on the trees, on the faces of passers-by, and on the smooth bluestone of Donkey Street, there were all kinds of scenes. It is a heroic and tragic color.Xiang Yu, the overlord of Chu, leaned on a spear and led a steed, standing on the edge of the Wujiang River in a daze. The river was surging day and night.But now there is no sun on Donkey Street.The scout was immersed in the drizzle, immersed in melancholy and sad emotions.For a moment he felt that his trip to the wine country was boring, ridiculous, and ridiculous.In the sewage ditch next to Donkey Street, there is a rotten Chinese cabbage, half a garlic clove, and a bare donkey tail. They are huddled together quietly, and they glow blue, brown, and gray-blue under the dim streetlights. colored rays.The scout thought sadly that these three lifeless still lifes should become the emblem of the national flag of a decaying dynasty, or simply engraved on his own tombstone.The sky was very low, and the drizzle appeared in the yellow light, like pieces of flying silk.The pink umbrella is like a brightly colored toadstool.He felt hungry and cold, a feeling he had felt suddenly after looking at the filth in the ditch.At the same time, he also felt that his buttocks and trousers had already been wet by the rain, his leather shoes were covered with mud, and the corners of the shoes had accumulated rainwater, and he was squawking as he walked, like loaches in the mud.Immediately after this series of strange sensations, his arms were frozen stiff by the female driver's cold body, and his palms tasted the embarrassing screams of her stomach.She was only wearing a pink nightgown and a pair of plush cloth slippers.Kicking and kicking, sloppy, not like she was walking but like two mangy cats walking with her on their backs.He remembered that the long history of men and women was actually a history of something like class struggle, that sometimes men won and sometimes women won, but the winners were also the losers.He thought that his relationship with the female driver was sometimes that of cat and mouse, and sometimes that of wolf and embarrassment.They fought while making love, tenderness and cruelty were equal in weight, maintaining the balance of the balance.He thought the thing must be freezing and he felt her freezing too.He touched one of her breasts, and felt that the formerly steamy and elastic thing had turned into a cold iron weight. A half-ripe green banana apple had been stored in the freezer for a long time. "Are you cold?" He said an out-and-out nonsense, but he continued, "Why don't we go back to your home temporarily and wait for the warmer days to come before we investigate." Her teeth were trembling, and she said stiffly: "No!" "I'm afraid I'll freeze you." "No!" Detective Hunter took his close comrade-in-arms McCall and walked quietly on Donkey Street on a rainy and cold autumn night... Words like this flashed through the scout's mind, and the words became clear, like "Kara ok" subtitle on the video tape, he is mighty and brave, she is rebellious, but sometimes gentle and affectionate.Donkey Street was deserted, and the water in the potholes shone like frosted glass.After coming to Liquor Country for an unknown number of days, he has been circling around the periphery of the city. The city is mysterious, and the city at night is even more mysterious. He finally stepped into the mysterious city at night.This old street of donkeys reminded him of the sacred pipes between the legs of female drivers.He criticizes himself for his grotesque associations.Like a pale adolescent with obsessive-compulsive disorder, he couldn't help the shocking allusions circling in his mind.Wonderful memories come and go.He vaguely realized that the female driver was the enemy he was destined to meet in his destiny, and his body and her had been tied together by a heavy steel chain.He felt that he had developed a kind of feeling for her in a muddle, sometimes hating and sometimes pity and sometimes afraid, this is love. The street lights are sparse, and most of the shops on both sides of the street are closed.But in the courtyard behind the shop, the lights are rising.The sound of thumping and thumping was not heard in this yard, but in that yard. He couldn't tell what people were doing.The female driver reminded him in time: "They kill donkeys at night." The road surface seemed to become slippery in a second, and the female driver fell a buttock.He himself slipped and fell while pulling the female driver.Together they broke the keel of the umbrella.She threw the umbrella into the ditch.The tiny raindrops turned to half-frozen hail, and the air was damp and cold.There was a cold little wind moving between his teeth.He urged her to hurry up.The narrow Donkey Street is eerie and a den of criminals.The scout took his lover deep into the tiger's den with clear handwriting.A group of black and greasy donkeys came head-on, blocking their way, just when they saw the neon lights on the side of Donkey Street illuminating the big sign of Yichi Hotel. The team of donkeys was overcrowded.He made a rough count and found that the herd consisted of twenty-four or twenty-five donkeys.They were all black with no stray hairs.The rain wets their bodies.Their bodies are all shiny.They were all muscular and handsome, and they all seemed young.They seemed to be afraid of the cold, and it was more likely that the great horror caused by the smell of the donkey street drove them to huddle together.They all squeezed in desperately. When the ones behind squeezed in, there must be a donkey squeezed out in the middle.The sound of the donkey skins rubbing against each other was like thorns piercing into his skin.He saw that some of them bowed their heads and some held their heads up.Shaking exaggeratedly large ears, this one is consistent.They are so crowded forward.The donkey's hooves tapped and slid on the stone slabs, making a sound like the applause of the crowd.The herd of donkeys slid past them like a moving hill.He saw a black boy bouncing around behind the donkeys.He felt that the black boy was somewhat similar to the fish-scale boy who stole his belongings.He opened his mouth, and just when he was about to say something, he saw the boy put an index finger in his mouth and whistled loudly.This whistle pierced through the thick night like a sharp blade, and caused the group of donkeys to bray high-spiritedly.In the experience of the scouts, donkeys always stop and raise their heads when they bray, concentrating on it, but this group of donkeys brayed while running.The strange phenomenon made his heart tighten.He let go of the hand that was holding the female driver's wrist, and rushed forward bravely.His goal was to grab the black boy who was driving the donkey, but his body fell heavily to the ground.The hard bluestone collided violently with the back of his head, "hum", a strange sound swelled in his ears, and two large groups of yellow lights flashed in front of his eyes. After the scout regained his vision, the donkey herd and the boy driving the donkey had disappeared without a trace, leaving only a lonely and cold donkey street lying in front of him.The female driver held his hand tightly and asked with concern, "Did you fall seriously?" "Nothing serious." "No, it was a very bad fall," she whimpered. "Your brain must have suffered a severe contusion..." After her reminder, the scout also felt a splitting headache, and the scene in front of him was like a negative of a camera.He saw the female driver's hair, eyes, and mouth were as pale as mercury. "I'm afraid you will die..." "I'm not going to die," he said. "My investigation has just begun. Why are you cursing me to death?" "When did I curse you to death?" She retorted angrily, "I mean I was afraid of your death." A severe headache took the interest out of him, and he reached out and touched her face in a sign of reconciliation.Then he put his arm around her shoulders.Like a field nurse, she helped him across Donkey Street.A slender limousine suddenly opened its eyes and sneaked out from the side of the road. The strong light of its headlights enveloped them.He felt that murder was about to happen.He pushed the female driver hard, but she hugged his body even tighter.But in fact there was no murder at all. After the car turned onto the road, it flew past. The red light at the rear of the car illuminated the white hot gas from the exhaust pipe under the car, making it look very beautiful. Yichi Hotel is right in front of you.The store was brightly lit, as if some grand celebration was being held inside. On both sides of the gate filled with flowers stood two waitresses less than one meter tall.They wore the same bright red uniforms, the same high hairstyles, the same faces, the same smiles.The extreme similarity will show the falsehood, and the scouts think that they are two dummies made of plastic, plaster and other substances.The flowers behind them also appear false because they are too beautiful, and they lose their sense of life if they are too beautiful. "You are welcome," they said. The tinted glass door swung open in front of them.He saw an old, ugly man supported by a filthy woman on a column of square glass in the hall.When he understood that it was the shadow of himself and the female driver, he suddenly felt hopeless.He wanted to exit the hall. A little boy in red clothes seemed to be staggering, but actually slid over at an extremely fast speed. He heard the little boy say in a shrill voice: "Sir, madam, should you eat or drink?" Tea? Is it dancing or karaoke?" The little guy's head was just level with the scout's knees, so that when they talked they had their faces upturned and the other stooped.The two faces, one big and one small, faced each other, making the scout feel condescending, temporarily overcoming some of the gloomy emotions.He saw an evil expression on the little boy's face that sent chills down his spine, and although he wore a humble smile like all well-trained restaurant waiters, the evil things still blew out .Like ink soaked through poor-quality straw paper. The female driver answered first: "We want to drink and eat. I am a good friend of your manager, Mr. Yu Yichi." The little guy bowed and said, "I know you, madam, there is a private seat upstairs." He leads the way.The scout felt that this little thing was exactly the same as those little monsters in the movie.He even felt that there was a fox's or a wolf's tail nestled in the crotch of his fat lantern trousers.Their shoes were all the more grimy reflected by the polished marble floor.The scout felt ashamed.In the hall, some beautiful women danced with their arms around some red-faced men.A little guy in black with a white bow squatted on a high stool and played the piano. They circled up with the little guy and walked into an elegant hut.Two little girls ran up with recipes.The female driver said: "I invite you, Manager Yu, to come, just say that the 9th is here." While waiting for Yu Yichi, the female driver took off her slippers wantonly and wiped the mud on her feet on the soft carpet.It may be that the warm air in the room stimulated her nasal cavity, and she sneezed loudly and continuously.When a sneeze was thwarted, she turned her face up, her eyes closed, her mouth parted, seeking the stimulation of the light.The scouts didn't like her appearance because it was very similar to the appearance of a male donkey in heat when it smells the urine of a female donkey. Between her sneezes, he asked, "Have you ever played basketball?" "Ah chirp—what?" "Why number nine?" "I'm his ninth mistress, ahh—!" Teacher Mo Yan: Hello! I have conveyed your opinion to Mr. Yu Yichi, and he said triumphantly: "How is it? I said he would write a biography for me, and he really did." He also said the gate of the Yichi Hotel Always open to you.Not long ago, the city government allocated a large sum of money to renovate the Yichi Hotel, which is open 24 hours a day. It is full of jewels and beautiful things. To be modest, it has reached the three-and-a-half-star level.They recently received a group of Japanese, and the little devils they sent were very satisfied. Their group leader also wrote an article and published it in the "Traveler" magazine, speaking highly of Yichi Restaurant.Therefore, when you come to Liquorland and stay in Yichi Hotel, you can enjoy the bliss in the world without paying a penny. Regarding the documentary novel "One Foot Hero" I sent you, there are a lot of games in it.I also stated in my letter to you that this article is my gift to you for your reference when writing his biography.However, I still considered the teacher's criticisms very humbly. My problem is that my imagination is too rich, so I often play it arbitrarily, branch out, and deviate from the basic principles of the novel.In the future, I must keep your criticism in mind, and work hard to write novels that meet the norms. Teacher, I am extremely looking forward to your departure to the country of wine as soon as possible. Born on the earth, if you don't come to the country of wine, it will be a waste of life.In October, the first Ape Wine Festival was grandly opened. This is an unprecedented event in the country of wine. It will be lively for a whole month. You must not miss this opportunity.Of course, the second Ape Wine Festival will be held next year, but it will not be as grand as the first and open up Hongmeng.In order to develop ape wine, my old father-in-law has lived with monkeys on Baimao Ridge in the south of the city for three years. I read the "Wonderful Events in the Wine Country" you want at my father-in-law's place a few years ago, but I couldn't find it again.I have called my friends from the Propaganda Department of the Municipal Party Committee and asked them to make a copy for you no matter what.There are many vicious innuendo articles in this pamphlet, which are undoubtedly made by people nowadays, but it is doubtful whether it was done by Yu Yichi.As you said, Yu Yichi is a demigod.He also has mixed reputations in the wine country, but because he is a dwarf, most people don't fight with him, so he almost has no scruples and does whatever he wants, and he probably brings out the good and evil of people to the fullest. Come on!As a student, I have little talent and knowledge, and I can't grasp the inner world of this character. There is gold here, just waiting for the teacher to come and dig it. Those few novels of mine have been given to "National Literature" for a long time, so I dare to ask the teacher to ask them.Please also tell them that you are welcome to attend the first Ape Wine Festival. Naturally, I will try my best to arrange the board and lodging. I believe that the generous people of the wine country will satisfy them. Enclosed is a novel titled "Cooking Class".Teacher, I carefully read almost all the works of the popular "new realism" novelists for this novel, absorbed their essence, and transformed it to some extent.Teacher, I still hope that you can help me forward this novel to the editorial department of "National Literature". I firmly believe that if you send it uninterruptedly, you will be able to move these gods who live in Qionglou Yuge and watch Chang'e comb their hair every day. them. Congratulations to Zhuan! Student: Li Yidou "Cooking Class" My mother-in-law, before she went mad, was a charming beauty—a milf.At one point, I felt she was younger, prettier, and sexier than her daughter.Her daughter is my wife, which is nonsense, but it has to be said.My wife works in the feature department of the "Liquorland Daily" and has written several interviews with strong responses. In this small place of Liquorland, she can be regarded as a prominent figure.My wife is dark and thin, with brown hair, a face full of rust, and a smell of fish in her mouth.My mother-in-law, on the other hand, has plump muscles, fair skin, and oily black hair, and the aroma of barbecue is released from her mouth all day long.The contrast between my wife and my mother-in-law is very reminiscent of class and class struggle.My mother-in-law was like the concubine of a well-maintained landowner, and my wife was like the eldest daughter of an old poor farmer suffering from hunger and cold.For this reason, my wife and my mother-in-law formed a deep hatred, and the mother and daughter did not speak a word for three years.My wife would rather sleep out in the newspaper yard than go home.Every time I go to see my mother-in-law, my wife gets hysterical and she curses me with obscenities that can't fit on paper, as if I'm not visiting her mother but a whore. Frankly speaking, in those days, I did have some vague longing for the beauty of my mother-in-law, but this evil idea was bound by a thousand thick iron chains, and there was absolutely no room for development and growth. possible.My wife's scolding burned those chains like a fire.So I said angrily: "If one day I slept with your mother, you have to take full responsibility." "What?!" My wife asked angrily. "If it wasn't for your reminder, I would never have imagined that my daughter and son-in-law can still have sex with their mother-in-law," I said viciously, "I have only an age difference with your mother and have no blood relationship. Moreover, it was recently published in your daily newspaper. An anecdote, Jack, a young man in New York State, USA, married his mother-in-law immediately after divorcing his wife." My wife let out a strange cry, rolled her eyes, fell down, and passed out.I hastily poured a bucket of cold water on her body, and then stabbed her in the middle with a rusty iron nail, pierced the tiger's mouth, and tossed for half an hour before she came back to life lazily.She lay in the muddy water with her eyes wide open, like a stiff dead log.There was a shattered, hopeless gleam in her eyes that made me shudder.Tears welled up from her eyes, down the corners of her eyes, and flowed to her ears.I think there is only one thing to do at this moment, and that is to sincerely apologize to her. I called her name affectionately, suppressed my disgust, and kissed her stinky mouth.When I kissed her mouth, I thought of her mother's mouth that always smelled of barbecue. I should drink a sip of brandy and kiss that mouth.The strange thing is that the years have not been able to erode the youthful charm on the lips, which are also bright and dripping without lipstick, which is full of sweet mountain grape juice.And her daughter's lips are not even as good as the skin of a mountain grape.She said in a slender voice: "Don't lie to me. I know you love my mother and don't love me. You married me because you fell in love with my mother. I'm just a substitute for my mother. You kiss me When I had my lips, I thought of my mother's lips, and when you made love to me, I thought of my mother's body." Her words were so sharp that they peeled off my skin like a skinning knife.But I said angrily——I patted her on the face lightly with my palm and said with a sullen face: "I hit you! You are not allowed to talk nonsense. You are delusional, you are hysterical, others know You will laugh to death. Your mother will die of anger if she finds out. I, Dr. Liquor, am an upright man, no matter how shameless I am, I will never do something that is worse than a beast." She said: "Yes, you didn't do it, but you want to do it! Maybe you won't do it all your life, but you want to do it all your life. If you don't want to do it during the day, you want to do it at night. If you don't want to do it when you wake up, you want to do it in your dreams. Live If you don't want to do it, you want to do it even after you die!" I stood up and said, "You are insulting me, your mother, and yourself!" She said: "Don't get angry. Even if you have a hundred mouths on your body, even if you spit out sweet words from a hundred mouths at the same time, you can't fool me. Hey, people like me, what are you doing alive? Living as a stumbling block? Living Annoying people? Living to make a living? If you die, forget it. If you die, you will be quick..." "You can do whatever you want after I'm dead," she waved her two fists as strong as donkey's hooves, and beat her two nipples. Yes, when she was lying on her back, there were only Two jujube-like nipples, and my mother-in-law's two breasts are as plump as a young woman's, showing no signs of weakness or slippery slopes. Even if she is wearing a thick woolen sweater, they are still brave peaks.The physical inversion of mother-in-law and wife pushes a son-in-law to the edge of the abyss of crime.Can this blame me?I roared unbearably.I don't blame you, I blame myself.She let go of her fists, tore the clothes with chicken-claw-like hands, ripped off the buttons, and exposed the bra. God, it was like a person without feet still wears shoes, but she was still wearing a bra!Her bony chest tilted my head.I said: "That's enough, don't worry about it, your father will still be there after you die!" She sat up with her hands on the ground, her eyes glaring fiercely, and said: "My father is just your shield, he only knows wine, wine, wine! Wine is his woman. If my father is normal, why should I worry so much?" "I've never seen a daughter like you." I said helplessly. "So, I beg you to kill me," she knelt down on her knees, hitting the concrete floor with her hard head repeatedly, "I beg you on my knees, I beg you on my knees, kill me. Doctor, there is an unused stainless steel knife in the kitchen, it's as fast as the wind, you go and get it, kill me, please kill me." She raised her head and raised her neck, which was slender like the neck of a chicken with its feathers plucked, blue in color, rough in skin, with three black moles, blue blood vessels swollen and beating rapidly.Her eyes were half-rolled, her lips drooped loosely, her forehead was covered with dust, oozing some tiny beads of blood, and her hair was disheveled like a magpie's nest.Where is this woman a woman?This woman is actually my wife. To be honest, my wife’s behavior terrifies me. After the fear, I feel disgust. Comrades, what should I do?She sneered sneeringly, her mouth was like a cut on a rubber tire, I was worried that she was going crazy, I said my wife said that a couple in a day is a hundred days of kindness, a couple in a hundred days is deeper than the ocean, we have been married for several years Nian, how can I have the heart to kill you?If I kill you, I might as well kill a chicken. If I kill a chicken, I can cook chicken soup. If I kill you, I'll be shot. I'm not that stupid yet! She touched her neck and said softly, "You really don't want to kill me?" "Don't kill, don't kill!" "I advise you to kill me," she gestured with her hand, as if she had already grasped the sharp, wind-like steel knife, and said, "Chi - as long as such a light blow Pull, the arteries in my neck will be disconnected, bright red blood will flow out like a fountain, half an hour later, I will become a piece of transparent human skin, at that time," she smiled sinisterly Say, "You can sleep in the same bed with that old baby-eating goblin." "Fuck your fucking shit!" I cursed savagely.Comrades, it is not easy for a gentle scholar like me to swear such dirty words. I am mad because of my wife.I am ashamed.I scolded her, "Fuck you... why do you want me to kill you? Why should I kill you? You don't come to me for good things, but you come to me for such things! Whoever wants to kill you will kill you, anyway, I I won't kill you." I stepped aside angrily.I don't want to offend you, can't I still hide from you?I picked up a bottle of "Red Maned Horse" and poured it into my mouth.I didn't forget to observe her movement from the corner of my eyes when pouring wine into my mouth.I saw her lazily getting up, smiling and walking towards the kitchen.I was taken aback when I heard the sound of running water from the water pipes.I followed quietly and saw her rushing with her head under the strong jet of water.She held onto the edge of the greasy sink with both hands, her body was folded into a right angle, and her buttocks were dry. My wife's buttocks were like two slices of bacon that had been dried for thirty years. I dare not take these two pieces of bacon. Compared to my mother-in-law's two-pronged ball butt, but the image of her ball butt lingers in my mind.I finally understand that my wife's jealousy is not purely vexatious.Xuebai must also be the cold water column flowing to the back of her head, smashing into clusters of white waves, making a loud sound.Her hair turned into patches of brown bark and foamed white.She was choking in the water, making a sound like a choking old hen eager to eat.I'm afraid she'll catch a cold.For a moment my heart was filled with pity for her.I feel that I have committed a heinous sin in torturing a thin woman into this condition.I went up to touch her spine with the palm of my hand, and her spine was cold.I said it's ok, don't bother, let's not do this kind of stupid thing that makes loved ones hurt and enemies happy.She straightened up abruptly, staring straight at me with fiery red eyes, without saying a word. For three seconds, I was terrified and backed away.Suddenly she pulled out the white steel knife newly bought from the hardware store from the knife holder with a swipe, drew a half circle on her chest, and cut it right at her neck. I rushed up and grabbed her neck and grabbed the knife without thinking about myself.I'm disgusted by her behavior.You bastard, you want my life!I slashed the knife hard on the vegetable pier, the blade penetrated into the wood two fingers deep, and it took a lot of effort to pull it out.I hit the wall with my fist, the wall echoed, and the neighbor shouted: What are you doing? !I was as angry as a leopard, circling in the iron cage.I said, I can't go on, I can't fucking go on with this day.After turning around dozens of times, I thought that I still have to live with her. Divorcing her is equivalent to reporting to the crematorium.I said, "We have to figure things out today! Let's go, find your father and mother, and let them judge. You can also ask your mother in person, what happened to me and her." She wiped her face with a towel and said, "Just go, you guys are not afraid of incest, so what should I be afraid of!" "Whoever doesn't go is a bastard tortoise." I said. She said, "Yes, whoever doesn't go is a bastard." We walked to the brewing university, and on the way, we met the city government's convoy to welcome foreign guests. Two brand-new policemen sat on the motorcycle in front of us, both wearing dark crystal glasses and snow-white gloves.We temporarily stopped quarreling and stood beside the locust tree on the side of the road like trees.A thick stench of rotting livestock carcasses rose from the gutters.Her cold hands timidly grabbed my arm, and I despised the convoy of foreign guests and felt disgusted by her cold paws.I saw that her thumb was disproportionately long, with blue dirt hiding between the hard nails.But I couldn't bear to break her hand. She grabbed me for protection, completely subconsciously, like a drowning person grabbing a straw.son of a bitch!I cursed.Among the crowd dodging the majestic convoy, a bald old woman turned her head to look at me.She was wearing a baggy cardigan with a row of white plastic buttons across the front, big buttons.I have a physical aversion to big white plastic buttons that grew out of my mumps childhood and a smelly nose doctor with big white plastic buttons on his chest with sticky fingers like octopus arms Touched my gills, and I immediately vomited.Her fat head was crouched on her shoulders, her face was puffy and her teeth were of brass.She tilted her head and looked at it, making all the muscles in my body twitch.I turned around to leave, but she jogged forward.It turned out that she was an acquaintance of my wife.She grabbed my wife's hand affectionately and shook it vigorously. While shaking my wife's hand, she moved her fat body upwards, and the two of them almost hugged and kissed.She was like my wife's own mother.So I thought very naturally of my mother-in-law, who was simply fooling around with such a daughter.I was walking alone to Wine Country Brewing University, and I wanted to ask my mother-in-law right away if her daughter had been a foundling from an orphanage, or had been switched by the nurses during delivery at the maternity hospital.If so what should I do? My wife chased after her, and she giggled—as if she had forgotten about the spatula she had just held—and said, "Hey, doctor, do you know who this old lady is?" I said I don't know. "She is the mother-in-law of Minister Hu of the Organization Department of the Municipal Party Committee!" I hummed pretendingly. "What are you humming?" she said, "Don't look down on people, don't think that you are the only one smart in the world, tell you, I will soon be the director of the cultural life department of the newspaper." I say congratulations, director of the cultural life department, I hope you can write an article to introduce Sapo's experience. She stopped in astonishment, and said, "You say I'm sapo? I'm the kindest woman in the world. If it was someone else, seeing my husband hook up with the mother-in-law would have exposed the sky long ago!" I said go away and let your father and mother judge! "I'm so stupid," she stopped, and said as if waking up from a dream, "why should I go with you? To see you flirt with that old flirt? You can be ashamed but I have to be shameless. Men in the world are like There are as many cow hairs as there are countless, so I am so rare about you? You can sleep with whoever you want, and I will let go of it." After speaking, she walked away very coolly.The autumn wind shakes the crown of the tree, and the golden leaves flutter and fall, falling silently.My wife walks through the poems of autumn, and the black figure establishes a certain connection with the delicate beauty.Her big letting go actually made me feel a little bit lost.My wife's name is Yuan Meili, and Yuan Meili and the autumn leaves form a sad lyric poem, which tastes like the "Riesling" produced by Yantai Changyu Winery.I stared at her, but she never looked back, which is called no turning back.In fact, maybe I hoped that she would look back at me, but the incoming director of the cultural life department of the "Liquor Country Daily" did not look back.She took office.Director Yuan Meili.Director Yuan.director. The director's back disappeared into the white-walled and blue-tiled buildings in Seafood Lane.From there a flock of mottled pigeons shot straight into the blue sky.Three large apricot-yellow balloons floated in the sky, with bright red ribbons embroidered on the ribbons.A man stood there bewildered, it was me, Dr. Li, Li Yidou.Li Yidou, you wouldn't jump into the bubbling Liquan River filled with the smell of wine to commit suicide, would you?how could be?My nerves are as tough as cowhide tanned with caustic soda and thenardite, which cannot be torn or pulled.Li Yidou, Li Yidou, walked forward with head held high, and soon entered the Brewing University, standing at the door of the mother-in-law's house. I think I must clear things up.Maybe I'll go all out with my mother-in-law—maybe not at all.This will undoubtedly be a revolution in my personal life.A note was taped to the door: Cooking class in the morning, practice classroom in the special food center of the college. I'd heard for a long time that my mother-in-law was an accomplished cook and a star at the culinary academy, but I'd never seen her in class.Li Yidou decided to listen to his mother-in-law's lecture and see her heroic appearance. I entered the Culinary Institute campus through the small back door of the Brewing University.The aroma of wine is still there, and the aroma of meat comes back again.There are many strange flowers and trees planted in the yard. Dr. Liquor is shallow and ignorant in front of the plants. They squint at me proudly, with leaves like eyes.More than a dozen campus policemen in dark blue uniforms were lazily moving around in the yard. When they saw me, they all perked up like hunting dogs that had found prey. Their pancake-shaped ears stood up, and they exhaled heavy breath from their nostrils. .But I am not afraid of them.I know they'll go back to their slack just by saying my mother-in-law's name.The campus structure is complex, similar to the Humble Administrator's Garden in Suzhou.A huge pig-liver-colored boulder inexplicably stands in the middle of the road, with the words "Beautiful Stones Pointing to the Sky" painted in yellow on the stone.I obtained the consent of the campus police to find the Special Food Research Center in a detour, passed through the iron fences, and left aside the exquisite buildings for raising meat children, the artificial hills and fountains, and the rare birds and animals taming room. Enter a dark cave, spiral down to the brightly lit place.This is already a place where idlers are not allowed to enter.A lady gave me a set of work clothes for me to change into.She said that the person you returned was videotaping the associate professor.She mistook me for a reporter from the city TV station.As I put on my cylindrical white work hat, I smelled a fresh soapy scent.At this time the lady also recognized me.She said that my eldest sister Yuan Meili and I were classmates in middle school. At that time, my academic performance was much better than hers. However, she became a big reporter, but I became a janitor. She said dejectedly, with hatred eyes Look at me as if I ruined her bright future.I nodded to her apologetically, and she immediately changed her frustrated face into a complacent one, and said arrogantly: I have two sons, both of whom are extremely smart.I said viciously: Aren't you going to sell them to the special food department?Her face quickly turned purple.I don't want to look at the purple woman's face anymore, I strode towards the practice room, I heard her gnash her teeth and say from behind: Someone will come out one day to clean up you man-eating beasts. The words of the female gatekeeper made my heart tremble. Who is the man-eating beast?Am I also a member of the Man-Eating Beast team?The words of the important officials of the Liquorland City government came to my mind when they were serving the famous dish: what we eat is not human beings, but a delicacy made with special techniques.The inventor of this delicacy is my beautiful mother-in-law.She is teaching her students in that spacious and bright practical classroom at the moment. She is standing on the podium, illuminated by bright lights, and I have already seen her big moon face that is as clean and bright as a porcelain vase . Sure enough, there were reporters from the municipal TV station recording the video. One of them, named Qian, was the director of the feature department. I had a drink with him at the same table.He was wandering around the classroom with a video camera on his shoulders. His assistant, a fat little white man, was holding a bright light and dragging black wires. Following his orders, he shone the incandescent light on my mother-in-law's face, and then turned it on. On the chopping board in front of my mother-in-law, and suddenly among the students who are listening attentively.I chose an empty seat and sat down. I felt the loving light in my mother-in-law's big taupe eyes stay on my face for two seconds, and I lowered my head shyly. Four words carved deeply on the desk with a knife jumped into my eyes: I want to fuck you.It was as if four stones had been thrown into my mind, causing splashing waves.My whole body was numb, and my limbs trembled like a male frog stimulated by a weak electric current. A little bit in the middle, I was very disturbed... My mother-in-law's unhurried and pleasant words came up from far and near like a tide, making my heart tremble. The body is wrapped in a huge warm current, and bursts of pleasure are running fast in the spinal cord, running fast... Dear students, have you ever thought that with the rapid development of the four modernizations and the continuous improvement of people's living standards Improving, eating, is not just for satiety, but a kind of artistic appreciation.Therefore, cooking is not only a technique but also a profound art. A qualified cook should have a pair of hands that are more accurate and sensitive than a surgeon, and have a sharper sense of color than a painter. A nose more sensitive than a police dog, and a tongue more flexible than a snake.A cook is a synthesis of all schools.At the same time, the level of gourmets is getting higher and higher. They have noble tastes, love the new and dislike the old, and it is not easy for them to eat satisfactorily.However, we must study hard, refurbish tricks, and try our best to meet their requirements.This is related to the prosperity of our Liquorland City, and of course it is also related to the great future of all of you.Before today's main class, I would like to recommend you a delicacy - she picked up the electronic pen and wrote five flamboyant characters on the magnetic blackboard: braised platypus.When she was writing, she turned her face to the students, treated people politely and gracefully.She dropped the pen and pressed the button under the teaching desk, and a curtain slowly opened on the wall, as if a general pressed the button to flash a battle map.Behind the curtain turned out to be a large water tank, and several flat-billed beasts with slippery fur and webbed limbs were swimming anxiously in the water.She said, I will tell you the ingredients and the specific production method below, and you can take notes.This unremarkable little beast once embarrassed Engels, the great mentor of the proletariat and the erudite man. It is a peculiar phenomenon in the history of biological evolution. It is the only egg-laying mammal that can be known on the earth now. .The platypus is a real rare animal, so we should be extra careful when cooking, and we must not waste it because of our wrong operation.Therefore, I suggest that you make more turtles before making platypus, so as to get a feeling.Let me introduce the specific method: Take a platypus, hang it upside down after slaughter, and control the blood dry in about half an hour.Note that when slaughtering, a silver knife should be used to pierce it from under the mouth, so that the edge of the knife should be as small as possible.After purifying the blood, remove the hair with hot water at about 75°C, and then carefully remove the viscera, liver, heart, and eggs (if any). The beast becomes an unpalatable waste.Take out the intestines, turn them over and rinse them with lye.Scald the mouth and four toes with boiling water, rub off the hard shell on the mouth and the rough skin on the toes, and pay special attention to protecting the integrity of the web between the toes.After rinsing, put the viscera in boiling oil and stuff them into the abdominal cavity, then add salt, garlic, shredded ginger, chili, small ground sesame oil and other seasonings - remember not to add monosodium glutamate - put it on a low heat to simmer, Until it turns dark red and emits a peculiar fragrance.Under normal circumstances, eggs and internal organs are oiled and filled into the abdomen at the same time. If there are larger and more formed eggs, they can be made into a delicacy alone. The specific operation method can be modeled on the method of braised turtle bastard eggs. After introducing the cooking method of the platypus, she brushed her hair together, and looked at the students like a chief about to announce an important decision. Every student felt her kind eyes caressing her face. I felt that my mother-in-law touching my soul.She said sternly: Next, we will start to teach the cooking method of braised babies.I felt as if a rusty awl had poked a hole in my heart, and streams of cold liquid flowed into my chest and accumulated, oppressing my internal organs and making me panic.Sticky and cold sweat gushed out from the palm of my hand.My mother-in-law’s students blushed one by one, and their hearts beat faster with excitement, just like a group of medical students participating in the dissection of human reproductive organs for the first time. The flustered and somewhat excited mood was vividly expressed through those twitching cheek muscles and those unnatural coughing sounds.My mother-in-law said: This is the finale of our culinary academy. Due to the scarcity of supplies and the high price, it is impossible for everyone to get a chance to do it. A substitute for practice. First of all, she clearly emphasized that the chef has a heart of iron and does not allow the abuse of feelings.The babies we are about to slaughter and cook are not actually human beings, they are just small humanoid beasts produced according to strict, consensual contracts to meet the special needs of economic development and prosperity of Liquorland.They are essentially the same as these platypus swimming in the water tank waiting to be slaughtered. Please relax and don’t think about it. You have to say it a thousand times, ten thousand times in your heart: they are not human beings, they are small human-shaped beasts .She smartly grabbed the rattan pointer and tapped on the edge of the water tank, repeating again: they are essentially no different from platypus. She grabbed the phone hanging on the wall and spoke orders into the microphone.She put down the phone and said to the students: This is of course a famous dish that will shock the world one day, so every link in our production process must not be sloppy.Generally speaking, the great mental stress before the slaughter of livestock will affect the content of glycogen in the meat, resulting in poor aroma of the finished product due to poor metabolism.Therefore, experienced butchers always like to use lightning-fast actions to end the life of animals, so as to improve the quality of animal carcasses.Meat boys are animals with higher intelligence than ordinary livestock. Therefore, in order to ensure the high quality of the raw materials of this big dish, we must find ways to keep them happy.The traditional method is to use a stick to knock the raw material unconscious, but this will inevitably cause the soft tissue of the raw material to bruise or even break the bone, which will seriously affect the appearance of the finished product.In recent years, the method of knocking unconscious with a stick has been gradually eliminated and replaced by ethanol anesthesia.The University of Brewing has recently developed a new type of wine pulp with a sweet taste and a very high alcohol content, which has created conditions for us.Experience has proved that meat boys slaughtered after anesthetized with alcohol, because the alcohol molecules penetrate into the cell tissue, effectively weakened the milky smell that was the most troublesome in the cooking process of meat boys in the past. The nutritional value of the meat boy has also been greatly improved.She took the microphone off the wall again and said: send it! My mother-in-law said something casually into the microphone, and five minutes later, two young women in snow-white coats and snow-white square hats carried a naked fleshy child into the classroom on a special small stretcher.Both women were fairly pretty in appearance, but their pale faces made me feel very uncomfortable.The woman put the stretcher on the chopping board and stepped aside with her hands down.My mother-in-law looked down at the pink meat b