Chapter 12 Chapter Eleven

My aunt Meng Shujuan and her female classmates didn't know what was going on outside.They heard Engman's breathless cry: "...don't make a sound, don't come out." Sure enough, no one made a sound, and no one crowded into the small window to watch as they did a few days ago.There are some slits at the joints of the blackout curtains, revealing the light of the flashlight, which swayed back and forth quickly, like several small searchlights.But they all lay motionless on their bunks. It wasn't until the sound of the old Ford's engine sounded in the yard that several bold female students got up and looked into the yard through the gaps in the black curtains.Can't see anything clearly, but can hear a bunch of men chanting.Shouting a Japanese number.

Cheers followed.Cheers in Japanese. The Japanese soldiers finally came in and drove off Old Ford, who had been with Father Engman for ten years—that was all they could figure out. The girls sat under the quilt, talking about what the Japanese soldiers would rob and what they would do next time. Shujuan thought of what she had heard while standing outside the underground warehouse with a shovelful of flickering soot. "They said that when Japanese soldiers ran into the safe zone, they were all looking for Huanghua's daughter," Shujuan said. Female students understand who "they" refer to.

"How do they know? They're hiding here," said Sophie. "Japanese soldiers want women, old women, girls aged seven or eight!" Shujuan said. "Spreading rumors!" Xu Xiaoyu said. "Ask Father Engelman to see who is making the rumor!" Shujuan retorted Xiao Yu: "Two days ago he and Fabi went to the safe zone and saw a dozen Japanese soldiers raping a little girl!" "It's just spreading rumors!" Xiaoyu said loudly.The news she didn't want to believe seemed to be denied with such a shout. Shujuan didn't say anything.She knew that the relationship between her and Xiaoyu was over, that this was the final rupture, that Nanjing was miserable everywhere, both the living and the dead, but for now, to her thirteen-year-old mind, the vast misery was still very vague. Losing Xiaoyu's friendship is the most substantive tragedy for her personally.Xiaoyu is so ruthless, even beautiful women are ruthless, just like Zhao Yumo, the beautiful woman in the underground warehouse, whoever is passionate will suffer, passionate is her ruthlessness.

After Xiaoyu yelled at Shujuan: "Spreading rumors", he simply moved from Shujuan's side and squeezed into Liu Anna's side to sleep.Shujuan lay down for a while, then got up and put on her clothes.When the local door was opened, Xiao Yu actually asked, "What are you doing, Meng Shujuan?" "Don't worry about it," Shujuan said.She said this in order to save face for herself and let her classmates see, you little fool don't want me to be your friend, just right, I've done enough to be your friend.How many hearts did you Xiaoyu buy with your father's empty words of rescue?Your father didn't even see a ghost!Even if your father is really capable of rescuing him, thank you, I don't care.

Two of the female classmates said: "Shujuan, don't go down!..." Xiao Yu stopped them angrily: "Don't talk to her!" Those two obediently obeyed the order and really ignored Shujuan. It seemed that she, Meng Shujuan, was completely isolated.She enjoys the freedom of the isolated.Wandering around in the yard, I wandered to the kitchen, saying that I could find something to eat if I didn't leave.Maybe the soot and sparks from the boiler can make a small brazier for me to roast my feet like ice cubes.I haven't washed my feet with hot water for so many days, and my feet are still cold after being covered in bed all night.As soon as she walked to the corner of the kitchen, she heard a man and a woman talking softly.The man is George, Shujuan immediately recognized it.

"...I can't, if I give it to you, the priest will kick me out." "Just cook a few yams, and he doesn't know!" said the woman. "The priest kicked me out, and I still want to be a beggar!" "Throw me out and I'll take care of you." Shujuan heard that it was Hongling's voice. "Cook five, okay?" "no!" "Three." "...Oops, the mouth has a hole in it!" "Pinch? I'm still biting!" Shujuan heard that the voices of two people were replaced by the voices of two animals, and she was so frightened that she retreated the same way.The stinky women's stinky meat can't be sold here for money, and it can be eaten in exchange for Yang Yam.Shujuan took seven or eight steps back, and the place she gave up at the moment happened to be between the two ventilation holes of the underground warehouse.At the stove, Shujuan heard someone crying in the underground warehouse.She sat cross-legged again and looked inside.

There was more than one person crying, Whispering and the other two women were both crying.When a person is drunk, he will cry like that, with a silly face and a silly cry.Zhao Yumo was also drunk, holding a wine bowl in his hand, coaxing the three female drunks.The little red wine stored in the underground warehouse was ruined by them like this. "...I saw the Japanese soldiers just now!" whispered. "It's so fierce! If you're going to kill me, don't you?..." Yu Mo coaxed her: "Why do you see Japanese soldiers, you can only see their shoes!..." "I just saw it!..."

"Okay, I saw it, I saw it." Yu Mo said. "I want to go out, I want to go, I don't want to wait for them to mess with me in this turtle hole!" Whispering became more and more silly. Shujuan's eyes searched carefully and found that one person was missing: Major Dai.Perhaps, as he said when he came, he didn't intend to stay here any longer.Shujuan estimated that it would be ten o'clock at this time, where can Major Dai go? Li Quanyou's voice came from a place that Shujuan couldn't see at this moment: "Use a fart medicine! It's useless!"

Shujuan hurriedly switched to another ventilation hole, and saw Dou Kou kneeling beside the soldier Wang Pusheng.Wang Pusheng was naked from the upper body, with a woman's padded jacket over his chest. The exposed face was different from the last time we met. His facial features were smoothed by ominous swelling and became smaller. "What did he say?" Li Quanyou asked Cardamom. Cardamom said, "He said it hurts." "It stinks, what medicine should I change?!" Li Quanyou said. "Let him suffer!" Cardamom stood up, took the bowl from Li Quanyou, took a sip, then knelt down next to Wang Pusheng's shop, and poured the wine into the soldier's mouth.

"It doesn't hurt after drinking," she said.Then she poured all the wine in the bowl into Wang Pusheng's mouth one by one.Everyone was quiet, as if they were enduring pain for Wang Pusheng. From Shujuan's perspective, Xiaobing's upper body can be seen struggling weakly, either hiding from the magenta wine he is not used to drinking, or hiding from Cardamom's lips.Although Xiaobing was dying, he still hadn't forgotten his shyness. Cardamom drugged Wang Pusheng and hugged her pipa.There is only one string left on the pipa, the thickest one, so the sound is deep and deep.Cardamom hummed while playing, and asked Wang Pusheng after a while, "Does it sound good?"

"It sounds good." Wang Pusheng said. "sounds so good?" "Ok." "I'll play it for you every day from now on." "Thank you……" Cardamom said, "Don't thank me, just marry me." This time, no one laughed at her as a silly elder sister. "I'll go home with you to farm." Cardamom said, like a child playing house. "My family has no land." Wang Pusheng smiled. "What do you have at home?" "...I don't have anything at home." "...Then I'll play the pipa for you every day. I'll play the pipa, you pull a stick, beg for food, and give it to your mother." Cardamom said, with a sweet dream in her heart. "I don't have a mother." Cardamom froze for a moment, and embraced Wang Pusheng with both hands. After a while, people noticed that her shoulders were moving.It was the first time Cardamom cried like a big girl. Whisper who was crying foolishly before, now she is crying quietly with Dou Kou.Several women around were crying quietly. Cardamom cried for a while, picked up the pipa and threw it: "It's all bad! It made people cry! Just this one string is worse than playing cotton!" At this moment, Shujuan realized that the intrusion of the Japanese soldiers had changed these women.They feel that no place is safe, that no place is off-limits to the occupying forces.Originally they knew that this hiding place was a crevice that was accidentally neglected by the war. Although no one knew how long it would be neglected, but tonight's Japanese invasion made them realize that this negligence would be corrected at any time and spread throughout the city. The 300,000 Japanese soldiers of Japan are infiltrating every alley, every door, and every crevice. When Shujuan left the ventilation hole, she found that she also had tears in her eyes.She actually made the women in the underground warehouse cry! It may be that the dying Wang Pusheng made Shujuan feel uncomfortable.It may also be the cardamom's childish "marriage proposal" that aroused Shujuan's sadness.There may also be a note of cardamom on a bass string.That tune is the "Tea Picking Tune" that everyone in the south of the Yangtze River is familiar with.Now Jiangnan is gone, only "Picking Tea Tune" left on a string. Shujuan's five viscera echoed the single-stringed "Picking Tea Tune", which was not humorous or playful, and was as dull as a mourning song.She went into the chilly church hall and sat in the dark.The funeral song "Picking Tea Tune" strangely reminded her of the Jiangnan she once had. Jiangnan had her own home and parents who often quarreled but couldn't get away... At this moment she found that she could tolerate even the women in the underground warehouse. As for her parents, she suddenly felt piercing longing and the fear of never seeing each other again. At this time, she heard someone talking on the second floor.She heard Fabi Adornado's voice and Instructor Dai's voice.Two men appear to be arguing. Much later, Fabio told Shujuan that the quarrel between Dai Tao and him on the night of December 18, 1937 was because the major wanted his pistol and grenade back. Major Day decided to leave the church after the Japanese soldiers hijacked the Ford.He came to the door of Fabio's bedroom, knocked lightly a few times, and said at the same time, "Vice Priest Adonado, it's me, Dai Tao." Fabio was drinking alone in the dark.He didn't want to answer when he heard the knock on the door.He had been with Father Engelmann for more than twenty years, and each had invented many ways of avoiding disturbing the other.At this hour, the priest would never knock on his door if the fire was not in the room. The major was still knocking on the door: "Father, are you asleep?" "Well. Let's talk about it tomorrow." "Tomorrow will be too late," said the major. Fabi had to hide the bottle in the space between the nightstand and the bed.The reason why Fabi is Yangzhou Fabi is because he often secretly works as a Chinese farmer through and through.I have been with Father Engelman for more than 20 years, but I am still not used to Westerners' red wine, white wine, brandy, and whiskey. At night, when the door is closed, he always returns to the life in the village: sip two hot koji, drink Wine and side dishes are also the taste of ordinary people in China: a few pieces of dried orchid tofu, half a duck egg, or a pair of salted duck wings. Unfortunately, there are not even such humble dishes to accompany wine at this time, so we can only sip dryly in front of the wine bottle. As soon as Major Dai entered, he smelled the smell of a small country tavern.He said, "Father Adonado is drinking alone." Fabius hesitated, and invited Major Dai to sit in the only armchair.At this point in the war, people can move accurately without eyes.Fabi poured a little of his own half bottle of wine into a teacup and handed it to Dai Tao. In this regard, Fabi is also a Chinese farmer; he is reluctant to receive uninvited guests, once invited in, he will have a share of food and drink. The two took a few sips of wine in the dark.Alcohol can open the mouth for difficult words.After drinking, the major spoke. "I wonder if the priest can return the weapons that Father Engman confiscated to me. I will leave the church tonight." "Tonight? Where are you going?" "I don't know yet." "Wherever you go, it's safer to go unarmed than armed." Dai Tao didn't discuss how to be safer with Fabio, but went straight to his own goal: "Can you help me with this?" "Father Engelmann is asleep by this time." "I know, I mean, you must know where Father Engelmann keeps my pistol and grenade..." "I don't know....Besides, if I know, I can't give it to you." "Why?" Dai Tao asked. "How can I give it to you? Engman personally collected the weapon, and if it is not returned to you, he must decide." "Okay, I'll go find Father Engelman." Dai Tao put down his teacup and stood up. "Let the old man sleep in peace!" Fabio's voice in the dark was entirely that of a peasant. "Will he sleep well? Will you sleep well?" "You also know that he can't live in peace? He hasn't had a life in peace since he came in with you! None of us can live in peace!" "So I'm going." The major's voice was cold. "You go alone, and if you don't take your two subordinates away, we will not be safe! You want them to implicate us? Affect a dozen of our students?" Fabi's words are powerful. Fabi, who thinks in Yangzhou dialect, has the sharpness and meticulousness of a western lawyer at the moment. "Wang Pusheng can't wait for two days. Li Quan has such a serious leg injury, how can he go?" The major sounded wronged. "If you can't leave, you leave them alone? Just like you did to the people in Nanjing, just leave them behind?" Fabi gesticulated, launching words with a strong alcohol taste into the dark space. "I have never seen any country's army like yours. Before the enemy came, they became enemies of their own people first. They set fire to and burned all the villages a mile around Nanjing City, saying that they would not give to the enemy. Leaving a bunker made it easier for you to fight, but did you fight? You left those ordinary people whose homes were burned to you and ran away!" In the past thirty-five years, Fabi Adornado has never felt so purely American, so unambiguously distanced from the Chinese. "Now you are the same as your big officers, leave your wounded and disabled subordinates and run away!" Dai Tao's hand was already on the porcelain teapot, his tiger's mouth was wide open, forming a hard claw with his four fingers.If you don't have a grenade, just use it to eliminate a Western devil who is full of evil.There was only more than one meter between him and Fabio, and he pounced on him, smashing his slightly bald forehead open, letting out all the red and white brains behind his protruding nose and concave eyes, which he thought he was superior to the Chinese.The humiliation of China for more than a hundred years is closely related to these Western devils, who, like the Japanese devils, do not regard Chinese people as human beings.They haven't done anything good in China.He heard the unique sound of porcelain cups smashing skulls, and the unique voice of a life that was about to end. The voice eliminated the boundaries of language, race, and human and animal. This voice moved him from anger to joy to intoxication , and finally reached a state of perfection... Dai Tao slowly put down the porcelain teapot, and groped towards the door.Just as the wine was on the top, the hand that grasped the wooden mug was regaining consciousness. "I'm sorry," Fabio said behind him. Dai Tao walked along the circular corridor, past the library and reading room.The strength he used to restrain himself from killing just now was far greater than the strength to kill.He was so tired that he had no strength left, not even the strength left to walk back to the "turtle hole" where he hid. Dai Tao slept on a long bench in the prayer hall that night.The three ounces of wine he drank on an empty stomach made him sleep like a few hours of death.Crucifixion Jesus on the cross, the eyes of dying emerge from under the drooping plaster eyelids, fixed on him. When Dai Tao woke up, the sky was just a little gray.He was so cold that he felt as if he had become one with the chair.He walked from the hall to the courtyard.For the first time in days I heard birdsong.I don't know if the birds understand that this is an extraordinary period for human beings, and the probability of survival may not be as good as them. Five minutes later, he found himself wandering into the cemetery in the backyard.In the entire church, he is most familiar with the terrain here.It was here that he fled into the church and landed.He picked up a cypress branch and used it as a broom to sweep a cement foreign tomb mound.He didn't know why he wandered into the cemetery.Just like most of his actions these days are aimless and lacking in meaning.Playing cards and craps with kiln sisters became more and more annoying to him.Being around women all the time turned out to be a maddening annoyance.And it was such a group of women who could quarrel for a long time over trivial matters.After Cardamom's death, the women all became nervous, whether they were sad or happy, they were all hysterical.At first he tried to persuade them a few words, but later he felt that the persuasion was boring, and his heart was extremely disheartened.The future and the future are uncertain, as a soldier hanging out with a bunch of pink girls, it would be better to die in battle a few days ago.Only one woman can see his sorrow, and that is Zhao Yumo. He thought that maybe he came to the cemetery for a purpose: to find the weapons confiscated by Father Engelmann.What is he looking for a weapon for?To seek revenge from the Japanese?Be a lone ranger, kill one by one, if you catch an official, ask him to bring a letter back, which says: "You have deceived more than 100,000 Chinese soldiers, shot them, and buried them alive. Such long eyes..." So childish. But he has to find the weapon. Then he heard someone behind him say, "Good morning." Dai Tao turned his head and saw Father Engelman standing under a cypress tree, like a stone man guarding the cemetery.The priest smiled and walked over. "What you're looking for won't be dug up here," said the priest. Dai Tao dropped the cypress branch in his hand: "I didn't dig anything here." "I don't think you're digging anything," the priest smiled again, teasing the major. "You should know that we the living should not take advantage of these honored dead by hiding things around them that would disturb their repose." It's really interesting: Engman's Chinese should be said to be close to perfect, but no matter how you hear it, it is still a foreign language.It is the foreign thinking system that allows him to use Chinese characters to express exotic sentiments. Dai Tao stood up, the pain in his left rib gave him a facial spasm.Father Engelmann looked at him worriedly. "Is it a wound?" asked the priest. "It's okay." Dai Tao said. Father Engelman glanced at the cemetery, with the conceited eyes of a manor owner looking at his own manor.Then he introduced the seven priests lying in the tomb to Dai Tao, using the slightly flattering tone of the reception.Forced by the request he was about to make, Dai Tao pretended to be interested and patient, and listened to him. "Do you think these Westerners are stupid, they traveled half the world, and finally came here to be buried?" Father Engelman asked. How could Dai Tao have the leisure time to think about those things. "You told me last time that your chief adviser is the German General Falkenhausen? I have an impression of him." He smiled shortly at a whim in his heart. "Music is the product of spirituality, and philosophy and science are based on reason. Germany is rich in these three types of people: musicians, philosophers and scientists. They can also rationalize the economy and military to the point of philosophy. So I I think that General Falkenhausen is not a good military strategist, but a good military philosopher. Maybe I am being judgmental..." "Father." Dai Tao said. Father Engelman thought he was going to speak, but he saw at once that the major hadn't even listened to his concluding ramblings; he'd been monologue.He fell silent and waited, although he knew roughly what he was going to talk about. "I'm getting out of here," said the major. "Where are you going?" "Give me back my weapon, please." "You can't go far. There are Japanese soldiers everywhere. Nanjing City is now a barracks of 300,000 Japanese soldiers. If you carry weapons, it will be even more difficult to go far." "I can't stay here any longer." Dai Tao didn't say what he wanted to say: he felt that in the underground garage, mold and rot began before he died.The first is mental rot. "Where is your hometown?" Engelman asked. Dai Tao gave him a strange look. "Hebei." He replied.His father was an old and rough soldier who was beaten out of the war, with more than a dozen scars on his body, and he couldn't even read much. There was only one way to get promoted: dare to die.His eldest brother and he are both graduates of the military academy, and the two younger sisters are also married to soldiers.His family is of loyal and patriotic blood.But he was only willing to answer the priest with the shortest words. Father Engelmann seemed to see the lineage of the heroic major.Because he went on to say: "I see that you are different from other soldiers. Many Chinese soldiers make me look down on them. They join the army to occupy women for promotion and wealth." "Can you give me back my weapon?" "Let's talk about it later, shall we?" said the priest. "Have you got a family yet?" "Yeah." The answer was shorter. "have kids?" "There is a son." Speaking of his son, he felt a pain in his heart.The son is five years old, and the road to growth is long. Is there a father like him who will accompany him? "I was ten years old when my mother died," said Father Engelmann. The old priest's voice was so full of emotion at once that it caught Major Dai's attention. Father Engelman suddenly saw that the corner of Dai Tao's mouth turned white.Must have had mouth sores.The Chinese attribute it to being too angry.Americans are attributed to the decline in immunity caused by vitamin deficiency and thus being infected by viruses.It appears that both Chinese and American diagnoses apply to the major at the moment.The corner of the mouth with the aphthous sore was not on a horizontal line with the corner of the other mouth, so his mouth was slightly crooked, otherwise this dark, angular face would have been more heroic.A man with such a face should be able to write military books and lead troops in battle, but Engman can't imagine what kind of character this face will be after mankind enters eternal peace. "My father died when I was sixteen." "Did you convert to Catholicism after your father's death?" "Both my parents are Catholic," Ingerman said. Seeing Engman at this moment, anyone would be surprised that at his age, he still misses his parents so much. "I started studying theology at the age of twenty. At that time I suffered from severe mental depression." "why?" "Who knew? That's how it happened anyway." Engelman was not telling the truth.The trigger for that bout of depression was a failed relationship.His cherished love from childhood to youth, which he originally believed to be secretly shared by both parties, finally discovered that it was just his unrequited love. "When I was dying, I met an old homeless man who had diphtheria and was almost dying. At that time, I lived with my brother's family. I quietly helped the old man to the barn on the farm and hid him with hay. Because I was in charge of taking care of the livestock for my brother, so no one would go in except me. I bought medicine for him and delivered him medicine and food every day. A dying life recovered slowly and little by little. Every bit of his recovery was given to him. I feel fulfilled, more fulfilled than anything. One winter passed before he recovered. He thanked me over and over again for saving him. Actually he saved me. I saved myself by saving him. That winter, my mental depression, an incurable disease, was cured. Helping those in need can actually make me happy.” Dai Tao listened to Father Engman's story about the past in American thinking and English grammar, and couldn't understand why he suddenly talked about such a personal topic.Does he mean that he came to China thirty years ago because there were enough miserable lives in China to be saved by him?Or was he like the seven priests in the grave, who came here because there would never be a shortage of poor Chinese for them to save, and the salvation itself would make them feel good?Or is he saying that he, Dai Tao, should also learn from him and gain a good feeling by helping two disabled companions in the underground warehouse? "I want to use this incident to tell you that the homeless old man was sent by God." He saw a trace of conflict between Dai Tao's brows.But he went on to say: "God used him to reveal to me that I would save myself by saving others. God wants us to help each other, especially when we are both hurt and weak. I want you to trust God. Moments in the hands of destiny—like this moment, when you should trust in God and not in weapons." This must have been the preaching that the old priest had the least audience in his life.Dai Tao looked at him and thought. "Will you continue to look for weapons?" Dai Tao shook his head.Of course he will keep looking.Look for it quickly.