Chapter 4 Chapter Four

I wondered, how did these two guys get together? From a long distance, I saw someone playing chess under the tree.Taking a closer look, it turned out to be Youwazi and Huang Xingzhong!I haven't seen them for a long time, so they left me and hid here. Never mind, this place is not bad.There are many trees, grass and flowers, and the sky is blue and green, which suits my taste.I like this kind of place, beautiful, but not a park, the beauty of the park is man-made.Look at those trees, they grow freely and spread their arms and legs. If you want to caress the ground, you can bend an arm down, and if you want to touch the sky, you can stretch out a hand. Amputate their limbs.The grass is also free, tall and short, wide and narrow, and can grow as long as you want, unlike those unjust grasses planted in the lawn, which are pinched from the neck every once in a while.

Really, there is such a good place, why didn't any of them tell me?It's fine if Huang Xingzhong doesn't tell me, but You Wazi shouldn't tell me!Youwazi and I were together when we were naked, and he is still my distant uncle in terms of seniority.Although because he is only two years older than me, I never call him uncle, and always call him "uncle", but I really can't resist it if it really calls out to him.When I first joined the Red Army, I once played donkey with the company commander about the gun, and it was You Wazi who used my seniority to calm me down.

After I got to the team, I was only assigned a large knife.At that time, I was so envious when I saw people carrying guns, even earth blunderbusses.I was secretly ruthless in my heart, and I had to find a gun to carry it myself.The first time I fought was in the middle of the night touching the fence of the white bandits.When I heard about the war, I was so excited that I thought this opportunity would come.Unexpectedly, when I came to the front, the company commander said that he would not let me rush in, but let me and a few guys stay on the outside to respond.I knew that the company commander pinched me with the corner of his eye because he thought I was young, but at that moment, he could only be anxious and stare blankly.That's how things are on the battlefield, and there's nothing wrong with obeying orders.

The battle lasted just over an hour, and when the gunshots subsided and it was our turn to rush in, the battlefield began to be cleaned up inside.Watching them finish the battle, I didn't even touch a hair, and my anger went straight to the top of my head.When I get angry, I can't control myself, and I destroy whatever I catch.At that time, there happened to be a stack of firewood next to it, so I swung a large knife and slashed on it a few times, unexpectedly, a person was cut out.When the man came out of the firewood stack tremblingly with his hands raised, I was shocked.In the dark, my first reaction was to run into a ghost.I jumped to the side, and just wanted to run away, suddenly felt that something was wrong, I am a soldier of the Red Army, I am on the battlefield, so why am I running?I hurriedly regained my composure, widened my eyes and took a closer look: My good fellow, what the hell is that? It's clearly a white bandit officer!

The white bandit officer probably also saw clearly that I was just a kid from the Red Army, so his back straightened up immediately and he stopped trembling.He saw that there was no one around, and said to me in a good voice: "Little brother, give me a size, and I will give you all the valuable things on my body." I ignored him and yelled at him: "Gun!" He trembled all over, pointed to the firewood pile and said, "It's...under here." As soon as I heard that there was a gun, I got carried away and immediately left the White Bandit officer aside and turned over.As I was turning over, I heard a gunshot behind me. I looked back and saw that white bandit officer was pointing his gun at me.I was immediately confused, this guy lied to me, the gun turned out to be in his hands!I thought, this is the end of the shot, I've been shot.But why am I still standing, why don’t I feel any pain?Just as he was thinking wildly, the white bandit officer suddenly fell down with a "gudong".Only then did I see clearly that there was another person standing behind him—Youwazi.Youwazi was holding a gun that had just been seized from Hanyang, and the muzzle was still smoking.

Youwazi saved me.Youwazi said that he ran over when he heard the commotion, and saw the white bandit officer pointing his gun at me. The gun belonging to the White Bandit officer fell into my hands.I took a closer look, good guy, it's a shiny new box cannon!Without saying a word, I quickly tucked the box cannon into my waist.At that time, I was so happy: I also have a gun, so I should shoot the box!Unexpectedly, the company commander asked me to hand over the gun before Wu warmed it up.I refused to hand over my life and death, so I drove a donkey with the company commander. I said no, this is what I seized!

The company commander said that everything captured should be returned to the public! I said that I am a public, and I have become a Red Army, am I not a public? The company commander said that the public is not an individual, but a collective. I said that I am a collective, so why am I not a collective when others are a collective?Why should the guns I seized be returned to others?Why can't I stay? The company commander said, if I say you can't stay, you can't stay! I became impatient, and straightened my neck and shouted at the company commander: You look down on people, you pinch people with the corners of your eyes, you play warlord, you...

The company commander frowned and shouted: Take his gun down!Immediately a few people came up to take down my gun. I went all out, and drew out a large knife with a "swish", and swung it loudly.I said you don't come up, whoever comes up, don't blame me for being rude! Seeing that I couldn't help me anymore, someone brought You Wazi.Youwazi went straight to meet me with a livid face.I said, you boy, don't go up, if you take another step forward, I'll kill you! Youwazi said Hanwazi, you can chop it off, but I'm your uncle, I want to see how my nephew chops up my uncle today!

My hand went limp, and the knife dropped down with a bang.Youwazi reached out to me for a gun, and I cried. I cried and said, You Wazi, you are my uncle, you shouldn't help others to bully me.Others don't know you don't know?It was because he didn't have a gun that my father was beaten to death by the white bandits.The white bandits hung my father's body on a tree and refused to accept it, saying that this is what happened to the chairman of the Soviet Union. I still don't know where my father's body is!I said, You Wazi, you are my uncle, you should know that I ran out with you to join the Red Army because I couldn’t avenge myself without a gun.How can I get revenge without a gun?Being in the Red Army and still carrying a big knife, isn't this the same as carrying a pike at home? !

Youwazi's eyes turned red immediately.Youwazi said, I know Hanwazi, how could I not know you?You listen to my words, sooner or later there will be guns, and sooner or later revenge will be avenged.The Red Army has the rules of the Red Army. When we become the Red Army, we have to abide by the rules of the team. We can no longer catch everyone and run wild like we did at home.The rule of the Red Army is that everything captured should be returned to the officials above, and then the officials above will distribute it to us.You see, isn’t my Hanyang-made one handed in and then sent to me?

I was surprised, You Wazi, did you return the gun? Youwazi said yes. I said that if I hand this box cannon over to the public, can it be returned to me? Youwazi said maybe, even if you don't give this one, maybe you will be rewarded with another gun. I took out the box cannon and looked at it for a long time before reluctantly putting it into Youwazi's palm. When Youwazi handed the gun to the company commander, the company commander squinted and said: You have a charter, Youwazi, and you can be my instructor tomorrow. With this sentence, Youwazi really became an instructor later. They are playing chess.I saw that the two were fighting in full swing, so I didn't call them out, and quietly stood aside to watch the battle. Youwazi was not Huang Xingzhong's opponent at all, so he let Huang Xingzhong go in for a round after three rounds and two rounds.Huang Xingzhong didn't look mad when he won the chess, and Youwazi didn't seem too upset when he lost the chess. The two cheerfully rearranged the chess pieces and continued to play.As a result, Youwazi lost again after a few rounds without support.They still have to set up chess pieces and come again, so I can't bear to look down on them.I said You Wazi, forget it, I can't beat Huang Xingzhong, can you do it? ! Youwazi replied without raising his head: "Playing chess has its own winners and losers, and winning or losing is all about playing chess. Fun is not in winning or losing, but in the game. Winning or losing is not in the game, but outside the game." I immediately confused Youwazi, and satirized Youwazi with a smile, saying, "Youwazi, when did you become so educated? I can't even understand what you're saying." At this time, Huang Xingzhong spoke up from the side.Huang Xingzhong said: "Understanding is not necessarily true understanding, and not understanding is not necessarily understanding. Understanding may be more confused, and being confused may be truly understanding." I looked at them both suspiciously, and asked cautiously, "I said, aren't you two sick?" Youwazi said: "Everyone who is born has to be old, sick, and dead. Everyone is sick, let alone us?" Huang Zhenzhong continued: "Sickness is with you, like an enemy or a friend, advancing and retreating from time to time, it's a companion, easy to deal with it calmly." I laughed for a moment and said, "Come on, you two don't pretend to be big cloves. Look up and see who I am, I'm Zhou Han!" I thought I hadn't seen each other for a long time, and they would be happy to hear that I came .But the two of them just looked up at me without being surprised, and then continued to play chess with their heads down. After Youwazi made a move, he asked me: "Hanwazi, do you want to stay here for a long time or just leave if you want to see it?" I said, "Youwazi, this place is so good, why didn't you tell me earlier?" Youwazi said: "Good or bad depends entirely on personal feelings. If you say good, it may not be really good, and if you say bad, it may not be bad. Have you decided to come?" I said, "Let's talk about it depending on the situation. I can't decide yet." Youwazi said: "The difference between certainty and indefiniteness is only one thought. In fact, certainty is an indefinite number, and indefiniteness is the real definite number. Since you haven't decided yet, I think you should go back first." Huang Xingzhong also said: "Yes, let's go. When you go, you come, when you come, you go, come and go, sooner or later." I'm completely covered, look at this and then at that, this one is You Wazi, that one is Huang Xingzhong, that's right, that's right!But why doesn't it sound like it when it comes to speaking? At this moment, a large bus drove up.The two immediately put down the chess in their hands, and followed each other into the car.Only then did I understand that they were waiting for the bus here.I hurried to catch up, grabbed the car door and just stepped up with one leg, when I saw Youwazi blocked me at the door and said, "Hanwazi, why are you in a hurry? I think you'd better not go and wait." As he said that, he stretched out his hand and pushed me out of the car. I fell down with a whimper, as if I fell into a bottomless pit, I only felt the wind whistling in my ears, and my body was falling faster and faster.Just as he was sinking, he suddenly felt his body being supported by something.I trembled all over, and suddenly realized that I was already lying on the bed. I woke up. To be precise, my consciousness woke up.But my body didn't wake up.I can't move, open my eyes, or speak, but I can see and know everything. I saw myself lying in a hospital bed, like a robot with many tubes and various wires attached to my body.The other end of the wire is connected to a machine, and there are some green curves and numbers flashing on it, constantly changing.After a short while, a doctor or nurse would come in and observe those curves and figures seriously for a while.They call these things "vital signs." I find it funny.Life is a living thing, something that cannot be simplified or abstracted no matter what method is used.How can these simple lines and numbers, these dry and lifeless symbols, be signs of living life?For example, I am awake now, but my signs have not changed a little bit, none of the signs can indicate that I am awake.That is to say, they thought they could observe my life through these lines and numbers, but in fact it was impossible. A ray of sunshine licked my face, like a calf, fluffy and warm, very comfortable. I remembered that dream just now.Was it just a dream?Such a beautiful place, such a real Youwazi and Huang Xingzhong, such a clear dialogue? The more you think about it, the more something is wrong, how could Youwazi stay with Huang Xingzhong?If Huang Xingzhong and I are enemies, then You Wazi and Huang Xingzhong should be considered enemies.If it weren't for Huang Xingzhong, Youwazi wouldn't have suffered.If it wasn't for Huang Xingzhong, I wouldn't have done something to apologize to You Wazi.Whenever I think of Youwazi in my life, whenever my heart is cracked, I bleed!People can't afford to do bad things. If they do bad things, they will have no peace for a lifetime. I am an example.I know that even if I do countless good deeds, it can't make up for this one bad thing I did to Youwazi.I know that even though I am a hero in everyone's eyes, I will always be a coward in front of Youwazi.I admit how You Wazi resented me, he should resent me.But it was Huang Xingzhong who he should resent more.But Youwazi and Huang Xingzhong seem to get along quite comfortably, so why can't Youwazi hate him at all? I remember Youwazi said a harsh word before his disaster.Youwazi said: "Huang Xingzhong, if you have the guts, just dig out my heart and let everyone see whether it is red or black! In the next life, I, Youwazi, will dig out your heart to see when I go to heaven and earth, and look at your cavity." Is it filled with donkey dung!" This kid Huang Xingzhong really has his head stretched, no matter how much You Wazi scolds him, his face will not be disturbed.Since then, we have all been a little afraid of Huang Xingzhong. Huang Xingzhong has studied in a private school for two days, so he is more educated than us.The appearance is also elegant, with a yellow and white face, a long nose, a thin mouth, and narrow eyes.It's just that he is a little short, and when it comes to my armpit, he is a little bent, and when it comes to my shoulders, he is too lifted, anyway, no matter how upside down, he is still a small man.As the saying goes: ten thin nine fine.Huang Xingzhong can be regarded as the top sperm in the Nine Essences.After Youwazi's disaster, Huang Xingzhong was picked up and assigned to me as an instructor.I didn't want to date him from the bottom of my heart, so I went to Li Yefu and asked for a replacement.I said political commissar, even if you give me a pig, I will recognize it, but I just can't match this nine-headed bird!Li Yefu replied unceremoniously, Zhou Han, I think you are a pig.I assigned Huang Xingzhong to you just to keep your pig's intestines straight from your mouth to your asshole! When I returned to the company with a full stomach, Huang Xingzhong was already waiting for me at the company headquarters. Before I could sit still, Huang Xingzhong took out his small notebook and said, "Commander, I have to report to you the state of mind of a few people." I immediately exploded, and I said: "Huang Xingzhong, whichever report you fall in love with, just don't mess around under my nose!" Huang Zhenzhong said: "Company commander, calm down. According to the organizational principles, I have the right to report to you." "I can't calm down!" I yelled at him, "You reported You Wazi to the ground, and you still told me to calm down with a stern face, how could I calm down?!" Huang Zhenzhong said: "Youwazi is the murderer who killed the head of the regiment, he is a member of Zhang Guotao, and he is a special suspect of the Kuomintang. I report that he is responsible for the revolution. He deserves what he is doing now." When I saw his little book, I didn't get angry, I grabbed it and threw it out the door and said, "Get out!". Huang Xingzhong said calmly: "Company Commander, let me remind you that you should stand firm on your class position!" I said, "Get out! Get out!" Huang Xingzhong didn't move, he stared at me deeply, and called out in a low voice but confidently: "Commissioner." "arrive!" "Move my backpack to the company headquarters." "yes!" It was from this day that Huang Xingzhong and I started to be partners.Although they separated a few times in the middle, they always bumped into each other without paying attention, and they couldn't avoid it.It really echoed the old saying "If you're not friends, you don't get together". After all, the two of us have been partners on and off for more than 20 years. In all fairness, Huang Xingzhong was quite capable.Whether it's an instructor, trainer, or political commissar, with him on the sidelines, he can save a lot of worry in the military.Like, as soon as the war is over I can just dump all the dirty cleaning up on him and he'll make sure it's cleaned up.For another example, I don't like doing captive work the most, and I'm especially impatient with dealing with those crying family members of Kuomintang officers. Huang Xingzhong never asks me to worry about these matters, and he always handles them very well. Huang Xingzhong's greatest ability is to be able to grasp the state of mind, no matter who it is, no matter what, don't try to escape his eyes.When I was an instructor, it was okay to say, anyway, there are dozens or hundreds of people in a company, so it is easy to control.But it is not so easy to be a regimental political commissar or a division political commissar. There are 1,800 people in a regiment, and thousands of people in a division.Besides, it was the war years, and the personnel changed rapidly. After a battle, a batch of casualties would be added, and the previous batch would be replenished.Huang Xingzhong has this ability, no matter how he fights or changes, he always has the ability to grasp the thoughts of various personnel anytime, anywhere.I remember that when the battle was at its most intense, a company in my regiment had three company commanders in less than two months.After the second company commander was killed in battle, the battalion proposed to let the deputy company commander come on top.I said yes, and the deputy top is a matter of course.Huang Xingzhong said, no, this deputy company commander was brought here as a prisoner, and he can't be a full-time job without a test of maturity.I said that it has been more than a year since he was captured as a prisoner. Not to mention how many battles he has fought, he has passed the lottery, so what else can he test?Huang Xingzhong took out the small notebook and said that at the end of last year he took home five oceans privately, and it was reported that these five oceans might be privately hidden spoils of war.When the troops were resting last month, he complained privately to fellow villagers who were taken prisoner together, saying that our battle was too shameless, and we were running around like rats all day... Hearing this, I immediately became angry.I said this is called guerrilla warfare, does he understand?Fuck it, don't use his Kuomintang regular army stuff to make pictures in front of me!Withdraw him!Make him a soldier!Huang Xingzhong said, no, if he is withdrawn, it will have a bad influence on the group of liberated people.I said that neither can I mention it, nor can I withdraw it, so what do you say?Huang Xingzhong said let him be the deputy company commander. The company commander, I think the platoon leader who reflects these situations is good, and he can be appointed as the company commander. I often feel puzzled, marching and fighting in the same way, I can't see how much extra effort Huang Xingzhong has put in, where did he come up with so many situations?Anyway, this kid has a very sneaky eye. When he was a soldier, he often reported the situation to Youwazi.At the beginning, Youwazi even praised him to me, saying that it's different if he is educated or not. You see, Huang Xingzhong has been in private school for two years, and he wakes up a lot faster than others.He knew how to take the initiative to understand the thinking situation around him, and he knew to take the initiative to report to me.As a result, later Huang Xingzhong took the initiative to learn about Youwazi's thoughts, so he took the initiative to report to his superiors.Only then did Youwazi realize how powerful he was.When I was under review, Youwazi secretly said to me: "You have to be careful of Huang Xingzhong. That nine-headed bird has more ditches in its head than you and I don't know how many times. There is one thing I have never told you. Once, he copied a long row of letters in a small notebook and showed them to me. I asked him, how can you read other people’s letters? He said that he dug through them in the middle of the night while he was asleep. Only then did I realize that he often got up in the middle of the night to look through other people’s pockets. At that time, I broke out in a cold sweat.” Hearing what Youwazi said, I also broke out in a cold sweat.It's been on my mind for decades.I will always remember Youwazi's words all my life: You have to be careful of Huang Xingzhong! Huang Xingzhong not only has thieves in his eyes, but also has a photographic memory.This ability became more and more prominent after he became a senior cadre.Generally speaking, cadres above the division level do not know too many grassroots cadres and soldiers. It is not bad if the cadres of the division can recognize all the main cadres at the battalion level.Huang Xingzhong did not.As long as he met and talked to him, Huang Xingzhong could not forget anything.The next time we meet again, no matter how long the interval is, he will be able to call you by your name accurately.This is a unique skill.With this unique skill, Huang Xingzhong was always supported and praised no matter where he went.Do you think, which soldier does not want to be remembered by the battalion chief?An ordinary soldier was called out by the division's political commissar at once, wouldn't he be overjoyed?Can you not feel reverence?Can you not talk about the goodness of the political commissar?In the same way, which grassroots cadre does not want to register in the mind of the superior?Good guy, the military and political commissar called out his name as soon as we met, can he not be flattered?Can you feel grateful?Can you stop talking about Huang Xingzhong's goodness?This is word of mouth!With these word of mouth, Huang Xingzhong naturally established prestige in the army, and naturally won a lot of good reputation with his superiors.If you don't agree with this point, you really can't do it. Before Huang Zhenzhong's death, he repeatedly proposed not to hold a memorial service after death, not to notify the troops, and not to say goodbye to the remains.After his death, it was decided by the research organization that the memorial service will not be held, and the army will not issue a notice, but the farewell to the remains will still be held in a small area, mainly attended by family members and us old comrades. Farewell to the body was scheduled to begin at seven o'clock in the morning.The time was set a little early, because the winter nights in the north are very long, and it doesn't get light until seven o'clock.It was snowing heavily that morning, and I thought that not many people would come. Several old comrades who were scheduled to come decided not to come because of the weather.But as soon as I arrived at the scene, I was stunned-so many troops came!These troops sent representatives on their own initiative after hearing the news.Some representatives even came from remote border guards by train for several days and nights!I recognized the liberated deputy company commander in the long queue waiting to say goodbye.With the support of a young soldier, he staggered to Huang Xingzhong's body and bowed for a long time.When I looked up, I saw tears streaming down his old face. I was deeply shocked by this scene.I think everyone who has led soldiers will be moved by this scene and will be deeply shocked in their hearts.Because there's no fake here, people can't afford to cheat on a retired general, make an emotional investment in someone who no longer holds their destiny in their hands.All feelings are sincere.Today, when sincerity has become more and more rare, when so many sincerities are suddenly concentrated together, the huge energy released by it is enough to shock everyone's hearts strongly. I said to Huang Xingzhong, as a soldier, when you leave this world, there are so many low-level soldiers to send you off sincerely, you are worth it! When I walked past Huang Xingzhong, I suddenly realized that I was really envious or even jealous of him.After all, those of us who have been soldiers and led soldiers all our lives, who doesn't want to be supported by soldiers?Just like the children you have raised all your life, can you not hope that all the children really love you?However, how many parents in this world can really get the love of all children?How many generals can really be loved by soldiers? This is actually very difficult to do. I mean, I'm not very sure that my troops, my soldiers will love me.In fact, I wasn't even sure whether my children loved me or not. Sounds sad, doesn't it? Yu Enhua scolded me most often: Zhou Han, you heartless, emotionless bastard! Although I can't hear it.But I admit that I really don't have much affection for Enhua. She has reason to scold me, no matter how hard she scolds, she won't be wronged.But it saddens me that I have heard similar words in the mouths of children many times since. Chuan Chuan said this before she got married, when her eyes were full of tears, she said: "Dad, you don't have feelings, so you don't know what feelings are at all!" Dong Jin said it when he was arguing with me. I remember his eyes were bloodshot and he shouted at me hoarsely: "Don't tell me you don't have feelings yourself, so you can trample on other people's feelings at will?!" He never said peace, but every expression and every action of his expressed such cruel words. Why do they all accuse me of being emotionless?No matter who I love or not.I don't know what exactly is wrong.I thought, if there was a mistake, it was a fundamental mistake - I shouldn't have asked Yu Enhua to be my wife in the first place. Speaking of which, it was all my fault. I took the initiative to find the logistics assistant, bribed him with a pistol, and asked him to do it for me.It was me who was crazy and insisted on getting married on the same day and entering the bridal chamber.Before that, begging for a wife had never been on my mind.According to regulations, as long as they were "cadres of the 278th regiment" at that time, they could marry their wives. "278 regiment cadres" refers to cadres above the regiment who are over 27 years old and have been in the army for eight years.Ordinarily, these conditions are enough for me, but I just don't realize this.In Li Yefu's words, it's just that my piss spilled out of the barrel of the gun, and I didn't even think about it.If it weren't for Huang Xingzhong, I don't know how long I would have to be ignorant before I would realize it. Huang Zhenzhong had his eye on Xiao Ping at that time, and was busy launching an offensive against Xiao Ping.At first, no matter how Huang Xingzhong sent the signal, Xiao Ping didn't respond.I persuaded Huang Xingzhong, saying, I think you should pull it down as soon as possible, he is a student in Peking, so he doesn't like you. Huang Xingzhong said: She didn't look carefully, but if she looked carefully, she would be able to see it, and she would fall in love with me. I said you kid is so sure? He said, of course, students like them like to be educated, and I take this one first among us cadres of the 278th regiment. I said, even if she liked your private school for two years, wouldn't she like your height?Xiao Ping is not short, how can I be so tall to stand beside her boss to hold her down, why don't you stop by standing next to her? Huang Xingzhong gave me a vigilant look, and said that you must have taken a fancy to Xiao Ping, right? I was overjoyed at once, I said I could fall in love with her?What's wrong with her, she is as thin as an eggplant seedling in the garden. Huang Xingzhong nodded and said, I was also worried about this point.It doesn't matter if a woman is fat or thin, but she has a big butt.Only a woman with a big butt can give birth. I asked if cubs are that important? Huang Xingzhong said, of course, what is the purpose of the revolution?Isn't it just for the cubs!Why are the living?Isn't it just to leave some roots in the world!We keep our heads on our trouser belts all day long, if we don’t quickly plant a few cubs and leave the root tips, once we are honored one day, won’t we live in vain? ! This kid Huang Xingzhong is really fucking powerful, he woke me up immediately.I just felt a bang on the top of my head, as if a big hole had been opened, and my eyes immediately became brighter. Not long after, our superiors assigned us a group of female cadres from the Women's Rescue Society from Shandong.The intention of the organization is very clear. The purpose of calling this group of lesbians is to solve the personal problems of us "cadres of the 278th regiment".After hearing the news, I specially called the logistics coordinator who was going to fetch people. As soon as the coordinator entered the door, I slapped a shiny new gun on the table without saying a word, and asked: How about this gun? The coordinator's eyes straightened immediately, and he picked up the gun in admiration with a "tsk tsk" in his mouth, turned it over and over again, and fiddled with it in his hand, saying repeatedly that it's a good gun, a good gun! I said, take it if you want it. The coordinator froze for a moment, looked at me in disbelief and said, Captain, this gun... are you really willing to give it to me? I said why are you so long-winded, if you ask you to take it, you can take it! Hearing me say this, the coordinator put down the gun instead, and said the head, why do I feel something is wrong? I said what's wrong?Can't I give you a gun as the head of the regiment? The coordinator looked at me with his neck stretched out, and said why did you give me a gun as the head of the regiment for no reason? I said why is it for no reason?I have something to ask of you. The coordinator was happy now, and said it was right.Captain, what's the matter? I said, are you going to pick up someone from the teacher? The coordinator is right. I said, can you pick one for me? The coordinator said yes, I can't wait! I said I have conditions. The coordinator said, you can say whatever the conditions are. I said there is only one condition, pick someone with a big butt! The coordinator almost burst out laughing, and said... the group leader, what kind of standard do you have? I said that this is the standard for expanding the revolutionary ranks.You pick me one with a big butt, and I can ask her to expand a class of Eighth Route Army soldiers for us! As soon as the coordinator left, we encountered the Japanese devils on the back.It was during that encounter that my combat staff officer died.He followed me from the time when the Red Army was reorganized into the Eighth Route Army in northern Shaanxi. Although he was a subordinate, he treated me like a brother.I remember when the troops traveled long distances deep behind enemy lines, we chatted together once.I asked him what he wanted to do the most after the victory of the Anti-Japanese War, and he said without thinking about being a wife.I know he has a young daughter-in-law at home. On the first day he left with the team, the family hastily asked him to share a room with the young daughter-in-law, saying that they wanted to leave a seed.But for some reason there were no seeds left that night.Later, a letter came from his family, saying that he had to find time to go back and plant again anyway, but we went further and further away and never went back.The combat staff officer died in my arms.Before he died, he looked at me helplessly and said, "Commander, I don't want to die, I haven't...saved seeds yet..." As he spoke, his eyes froze, and he stared at me wide open. When the coordinator came back with his people, I hadn't gotten over the grief of the sacrifice of the combat staff officer, and I rode my horse and galloped in the wild all day long.The coordinator came to look for me, chased after me and shouted, he picked a woman with a butt bigger than a millstone for me, and asked me to see if she looked right?I stopped the horse suddenly, turned around and yelled loudly: "Look at the feather! I will marry her tonight, and I will leave a seed tonight!" That night, I married Yu Enhua.To be honest, I was so busy being a kid that night that I almost didn't even see Yu Enhua's face clearly.I didn't expect that being a cub was as thrilling as fighting a war, the same cannon fire, and the same exhilaration.From then on, when I was fighting, I put all my energy into fighting, and when I was resting, I put all my energy into being a cub. I like being a cub, and every time I am a cub, I yell and scream hard. I said, Yu Enhua, I have planted seeds! I said, Yu Enhua, I broadcast all good seeds! I said, Yu Enhua, you have to give me at least one class! Yu Enhua never said anything, and always avoided me as soon as the work was over, keeping his eyes far away from me.That expression often made me feel like a beast, and the good mood of planting seeds suddenly plummeted, and I was immediately annoyed, thinking that I would never talk to this girl again for the rest of my life. But as soon as there is a war, as soon as I get off the battlefield, I can't help but want to grab her as a cub immediately, wishing I could plow the whole land under me. Chuan Chuan was dozing off on the sofa beside the hospital bed.You could tell she was tired, her eyelids were puffy, and her face was gray.It can also be seen that she is very worried, even when she is sleeping, her brows are slightly frowned.This girl is preoccupied and introverted, just like her mother.Although I don't like her mother, I like this girl. When Yu Enhua gave birth to Chuanchuan, I was away fighting.When I saw Chuan Chuan, she was already half a year old.I was not happy seeing the birth of a child without a "handle".I asked Yu Enhua aggressively, why did you get rid of the "handle" for me? ! Yu Enhua gave me a blank look and said: Are your seeds picked out?They can all carry "handles"! I said that my Zhou Han's species were picked out, so everyone had to carry a "handle"! Yu Enhua said that I can't do it if you choose whoever you want to live with! As soon as I heard that this bitch made such a big mistake, not only was she not humbly self-criticizing, but also confronting me, I couldn't help but raised my hand, and I was going to hug her firmly to relieve my anger. At this moment, the girl suddenly opened her mouth and called out "Dad, Dad, Dad". The hand raised in mid-air was stopped suddenly, and Yu Enhua and I froze there. Yu Enhua said, it's strange, every child knows how to call mother first, how can she be like this, no matter how taught, she can't call mother, but can call father with one mouth? I said she is called Dad?Why do I sound like "handle"? Yu Enhua said that "ba'er" sounds the same as "da". As soon as I heard it, I was happy, and you are right, "Dad" is "Baer", and "Baer" is "Dad", "Dad" and "Baer" are the same thing!I hugged Chuan Chuan and said, "Girl, call Dad again." Chuan Chuan really grinned and yelled "Dad, Dad, Dad", which made me so happy that I forgot to worry about whether there was "handle" or "handle" with Yu Enhua. up.This girl has been sensible since she was a child, and she is painful. To be honest, among the children I love Chuan Chuan the most.I will not force her to marry Wu Geunzhu if I don't love her.Although she didn't understand me at the beginning and even resented me, I still think I did the right thing.Facts have proved that the couple have been living well, haven't they? Wu Geunzhu was my favorite, he was my bodyguard at that time. I have a problem with being a scolding person. I can't control myself when I am in a hurry, and I scold whoever I catch.One of the people around me counted as one, and I scolded me a lot.This bug came down during the war.When fighting a war, you want to have fun and don’t restrain yourself. As long as you win the battle, others don’t care about you.Later, when there was no longer any battle to fight, and I felt aggrieved and panicked, I was more willing to swear.Once I got used to scolding, I couldn't control my words.其实，说管不住也是姑息自己。我心里明白，我这也是倚老卖老、假癫不痴。说到底还是在心里头觉着自己是老红军，打过恶仗，立过大功，有骂人的资本。 赶巧那天我心里不痛快，刚刚下部队走了一圈，看到部队把政治突出得没了边，我问连队的军事训练情况，连队指导员给我介绍了半天政治学习、农副业生产和三支两军工作。我说不要扯那么远嘛，我今天来主要是想听听你们军事训练搞得怎么样。指导员说，首长，我们不是战备值班部队，军事训练不是我们的主要任务。我一听就火了，刚想拍桌子骂人，秘书刘希文在后面扯了我一下，我这才冷静下来。只听指导员接下去说道，通过学习毛主席著作，我们全连同志深刻体会到，我们的人民军队不仅是一支战斗队，还应该是生产队、宣传队……临走前，我强压着火气，语气很重地说，你们给我听着，军事训练还是要搞的，我们毕竟是军队，是要上战场打仗的！出来后，刘秘书悄悄告诉我，这个连队是黄振中政委抓的政治挂帅先进典型，连队干部都是通天的人物，让我说话千万小心，别让人家抓住单纯军事观点的把柄。我听后只苦笑了一下，再什么话也没说。 回到家，吴根柱就把这几天的文件都拿到我面前。我一看上面第一份文件就是那个连队的典型材料，气立刻不打一处来，随手就把材料摔到地上。 吴根柱眼睛立刻直直地看着我。这小子平时挨我的骂不多，他有个最对我心思的爱好，就是喜欢侍弄地。我这一茬茬的警卫员虽然大多数都是从农村来的，但大多数都不喜欢种地，个个好像都憋着劲要把自己的根从农村拔出来，宁肯晾成城市的萝卜干子，还就吴根柱这小子喜欢这口。当然了，没一个警卫员敢当着我的面说不喜欢种地，说不愿意像个老农似的整天跟在我屁股后面侍弄地，但我能看出来。我一眼就看出吴根柱喜欢地，他看园子时的眼神儿不一样，眼珠子贼亮，犁尖似的细细把地从头到尾犁过一遍后，就贪婪地吧叽着嘴巴，情不自禁地搓开手了。当时我就乐了，我说小鬼会种地吗？他说会哩。我说喜欢这活？他咧开嘴巴说喜欢哩！然后手向前指着说，首长那几趟豆角该搭架子了。我说那还不动手等什么！他就欢天喜地地跟着我干起来。其实真要讲种地，院子里那点地还不够吴根柱一个人种呢，但这小子特别懂我心思，就知道我忙虽忙，地是不能不亲自种的，所以无论什么活他都给我留着点，说首长你下部队这两天我把小白菜间了，还剩几垄今天晚饭后干吧？或者说首长我把架子杆准备好了，今天给黄瓜秧搭架子怎么样？就为这，我对吴根柱就有了一种自然的亲近感，所以很少骂他。 吴根柱说，首长，你……你骂谁？ 我不耐烦地说，骂你！ 他脸憋得红红地说，那，你得把这话收回去！ 我这里正火着呢，他小子还跟我胡搅，我立刻控制不住了，大喊了一声：收个逑！我就操你娘了！ 没想到，还没等我话音落地呢，吴根柱就还了我一句：操你娘！ 我一下愣了，半天也没反应过来。骂了这么多年人了，很少有人敢跟我对骂，个别有几个敢上来叫板的，也都是与我年龄、职务差不多的，从没有一个警卫员敢骂我！反了！我双脚一点，噌地蹦到沙发上，气急败坏地指着吴根柱大叫道：你小子……你他妈的敢骂老子！ 吴根柱骂完显然也傻了。看我气成那样，知道自己反正也没个好了，就干脆豁出去了，梗着脖子说：我就骂了，咋的？ ! 我吼道，老子一枪崩了你！你他妈的活腻歪了，敢骂老子？ 吴根柱声音低下来，但仍不服气地说，首长，我本来不敢骂你，可一听你骂我娘就忍不住了。反正……反正谁骂我娘也不行！毛主席也不行！ 我一下就噎在那了，理由充足哇，看不出，这小子还是个孝子呢！这么一想，火气就消了一大半。我说，好小子，你有种！敢跟我周汉对着骂娘的人还真不多呢，你就不怕我给你个处分？ 吴根柱红头涨脸地说，首长，给啥处分我都认了，就是不能骂我娘！ 我突然发现这小子挺对我胃口！耿直，孝顺。我从沙发上跳下来，围着他转了一圈，突然问道，你娘还在？ exist. 你爹呢？ 早不在了。 兄弟几个？ 四个。 就靠你娘一个人拉扯？ Ok. 吴根柱说他爹死得早，他们哥四个都是娘拉扯大的。娘白天干农活，晚上缝补，好不容易把儿子们拉扯成人了，自己也熬成了个半瞎子。他说他最大的愿望就是孝敬娘，能让娘顿顿吃上白馍。 我把吴根柱上上下下打量个遍，突然问，吴根柱，你给我当女婿怎么样？ I?吴根柱嘴巴张得像个瓢。 我说对，就是你。 吴根柱惊得眼珠子都要掉出来了，说首长，我可……可不敢…… 我打断他的话说，你小子连我都敢骂，当我女婿有什么不敢的？ 吴根柱说，首长，我骂你不对，你处分我吧，怎么处分我都认。 我说，你这个人可真怪了，媳妇不要要处分，是不是看不上川川呀。 吴根柱赶紧说，不是，首长，是我配不上川川。 我问为啥？ 吴根柱低声说，首长，我是战士，川川是干部，再说，我家在农村，是普通老百姓，家庭条件不好，和首长家没法比。 我说，吴根柱你给我说老实话，除了这个原因，还有别的吗？ 他说没了。 我就哈哈大笑道，好，那我就做主把这事定下了：你，给我当女婿！ 我万万没料到川川会坚决不同意。这丫头平时挺随和的，我以为她自己没啥主意，没想到她上来倔劲不比哪个差。于恩华也不同意。于恩华说川川大学毕业就是军医了，怎么能找个警卫员？我说你得用发展的眼光看问题嘛，吴根柱这小子今后肯定会有出息，冲他敢骂我这一条就没错。于恩华说，一个警卫员能有啥出息？我说我就是当警卫员出身的，你敢说我现在不出息？于恩华说，周汉，我看川川不同意是另有心事，她好像对刘希文不错。我看刘希文也不错，脑子来得快，办事又稳重。我一惊，立刻说道，那可不行，刘秘书早就订婚了。于恩华说订婚不等于结婚，再说他那个未婚妻是参军前父母给包办的，他根本就不情愿。我说那也不行！情愿不情愿人家未婚妻都搬家里住了，就等着他回去结婚呢。告诉你，可不能给我胡来呀，刘秘书是个好苗子，要是弄出喜新厌旧的舆论就把他给毁了。再说，我当司令员的身边也不能出陈世美！于恩华就不做声了。 想想不放心，我就把刘希文找来谈了次话。我说刘秘书你打算什么时候结婚呀？刘希文小心翼翼地看着我说，我还年轻，不想因为个人问题影响工作学习，结婚的事我想放两年再考虑。我就说，刘秘书，其实个人问题处理好了并不影响工作学习，处理不好才会影响个人进步呢。我这回下部队，就发现基层有些农村入伍的干部，一提干就把农村对象甩了，赶紧找个城市姑娘。这叫什么思想？这叫喜新厌旧的资产阶级思想！这叫陈世美！我当时就告诉下面部队的领导，对这种思想长毛的人决不能姑息迁就，发现一个就给我处分一个，光给处分还不行，还要让他们老老实实回农村去，回到被他们抛弃的秦香莲身边去！刘希文警觉地看了我一眼，我才缓了口气说，扯远了，刘秘书，你各方面表现都不错，很有发展前途。我的意见，你还是安排一下早点回去结婚吧。让家里老人放心，也让组织上放心。 响鼓不用重槌敲，刘希文果然很快就回家结婚去了。 看得出，那段日子川川的情绪很不好。但我没在意，年轻人嘛，什么事情都会很快就过去的。刘希文结婚以后，川川才同意与吴根柱相处。但提出一个条件：得送吴根柱上学。这事好办，就是川川不提出来，我也准备安排吴根柱去军校深造。正好当时后勤学院有个名额，就让吴根柱去了。这以后虽说看不出他俩恋爱谈得有多热乎，但很平稳，没啥起伏波折。每次我问川川他俩相处得怎么样，川川总是回答说就那么回事吧。直到我催他俩结婚时，川川才说，爸爸，这事我还没想好呢。我就急了，我说你都跟人家谈了好几年了还没想好，不是坑人家吗？不行，你马上给我结婚！川川说，爸爸，我不想马上结婚。我说，你就得马上结婚，除非你拿出叫人信服的理由！川川说，吴根柱这个人感情方面太粗糙，我……我一听就炸了，这算什么理由！男人嘛，又不是老娘们儿，男人粗糙能算毛病？我粗糙不粗糙？我这么粗糙你妈不也照样跟我过了一辈子吗？川川眼睛红红地望着我说，爸爸，你什么时候在乎过妈妈的感情？你以为妈妈嫁给你生活得很幸福吗？我愣了一下说，反正我没亏了她，该得到的她都得到了，她没什么可抱怨的！川川的眼泪就下来了，川川说，爸爸，你没有感情，所以你根本就不懂什么是感情！ 这是我和川川感情上伤害得最厉害的一次。虽然她后来还是按照我的意愿同吴根柱结了婚，但我和她的心里都明白。我知道她怨恨我，这使我常常觉得很伤心，我爱这丫头，从心里不愿意伤害她，但还是伤害了她。我希望能给她带来幸福快乐，但她似乎并不快乐。我不知道为什么会是这样。 到处都是白茫茫的，风贴着地面横扫，卷起生硬的雪粒子，劈头盖脸地甩出去，甩出一片天昏地暗。 白毛风，北方最恶劣的天气。 望远镜里出现了两个黑点，调近焦距才看清是两个巡线兵，一个背着线拐子，一个拎着爬线杆的脚蹬子。他们顺着架线的山梁，一段一段地走。走到一个线杆底下就停下来，爬上线杆，接通电话试一试。拎脚蹬子的一看就是个老兵，爬杆的动作十分熟练，一边做还一边讲解。背线拐子的显然是个小鬼，满脸稚气，走起路来一蹿一蹿的，爬杆的样子显得十分笨拙，每次接通电话都兴奋地对着话筒使劲喊。天边渐渐聚集起一片铅色的阴云，阴云缓慢地向前推进着，面积越来越大，颜色越来越重。飘雪花了，大片大片的雪花铺天盖地地压下来，那架势像是要把天地一口吞没。 两个兵收拾起东西准备往回走了。正在这时，那个小鬼不知为什么突然扔下东西，向山梁下面跑去。老兵在后面喊了几句，小鬼却头也不回地继续往前跑。老兵急了，扔下手里的东西紧跟着追了上去。 糟糕，前面是一处石砬子！厚雪覆盖着石砬子，使人很难一眼看出这里的险恶，小鬼还在不知深浅地往前跑。我急得放声大喊起来，但不知为什么喉咙里却发不出一点声音。就在老兵眼看就要追上小鬼的时候，小鬼的脚下一滑，突然摔下崖去。完了，我心头一紧，下意识地闭上了眼睛。 睁开眼时，我发现小鬼并没摔到崖底，还好，崖边的一棵小树挂住了小鬼。老兵赶紧伸手去抓，但却怎么也抓不到。老兵急忙俯身趴在雪地上，把手臂伸得长长地去够。一次，两次，三次，老兵的手终于抓住了小鬼。我刚想松口气，但却发现还不到松气的时候，崖边太滑，老兵即便抓住了小鬼也很难把他拉上来。看得出老兵正使尽全身力气把小鬼往上拽，但却怎么也拽不动。我看这样下去不行，就向老兵喊道：你让小鬼抓住左前方那棵树，两下借力往上攀！虽然我还是没听到自己的声音，但老兵似乎是听到了。老兵急切地对小鬼说了几句，小鬼就开始抓左边那棵树。抓住那棵树后，果然就借上了不少力，小鬼开始往上攀爬了，一点点地向崖顶接近。 就在这时，我的耳边出现了一种令人不安的声音。那声音开始很小，像是远处有人走来似的，在雪地上踩出吱吱嘎嘎的细响。但很快我就听出不对了，那声音渐渐大了起来，仿佛是从地底下传来的，带着一种令人心悸的微微震颤。not good!就在我刚刚醒悟过来，正想开口大叫的时候，传来了一阵轰隆隆的巨响，那片冰砌雪堆的崖头突然间坍塌了。 我眼睁睁地看着老兵和小鬼坠落下去了。眼前腾起一片片白色的雪烟之后，就什么也看不到了。 “爸爸！”有人在叫我。 是东进！东进怎么来了？他站在我的床边，吃惊地望着我。 我的眉头一下就皱起来了。也不知道怎么搞的，一见东进我就想皱眉头，这小子身上有股子让我受不了的劲儿。好长时间没见到东进了，他的样子看上去很疲惫。我知道东进不容易，部队里最难干的就是连长、团长这两级干部。特别是他这种边防部队的团长，睡觉都得睁着一只眼睛，稍不注意一卡巴眼儿的工夫就会出事，而且只要出事就不是小事。边境无小事，再小的事处理不好也能弄成大事。我本想关心关心东进，问问他最近的情况，但一张嘴就习惯性地变成了责问：“你怎么回来了？” 东进好像没听见，没应声。 我放大声音喝问道：“问你话呢，你怎么回来了！” 东进仍旧没听见，只吃惊地望着我，似乎不相信我会躺在病床上。很久，我才感觉到他在说：“爸爸，你怎么病了？你怎么一下子就病成这样了？” 我说感觉到是因为我并没看到他的嘴动，但我却感觉到了他对我说的话。我心里很生气，这小子越来越不像话了，连我的问话都不肯回，我就气哼哼地说：“我的事用不着你管，你回来干什么？谁让你回来了？” 搁往常，东进肯定会跟我顶起来。也许他会说，对不起了爸爸，是领导让我回来的，我也不想回来，可惜军命难违呀。也许他会说，爸爸，我当然不敢管您的事了，我也斗胆求您一句，别管我的事好不好？我们俩就势就能干起来，结果当然是我大发雷霆，东进落荒而逃。但这次没有，这次东进似乎对我说什么都充耳不闻，他是真的没听见吗？ 我感觉到东进又在说：“爸爸，我不相信你真会有病。你不该是躺在床上的这副样子，你应该站起来，气势汹汹地朝着我大喊大叫，你怎么能躺下呢？” 我说：“你给我住嘴！少在那东扯葫芦西扯瓢的，你回来干什么！” 不知道东进是在回答我，还是在自顾自地说：“他们说你病得很厉害，他们说你……很危险……” 我不耐烦地打断他说：“我没事。东进，你给我赶快回去。黑山口哨所出事了，有两个兵在暴风雪中掉到石砬子下面失踪了，得赶快把他们救出来！” 东进对我的话丝毫没有反应，仍旧自顾自地说：“爸爸，他们说你几天来一直就这样昏迷着，什么也不知道。” 我说：“胡扯！我知道，我什么都知道！我不仅知道他们把那些数字和线条当成我的生命天天盯着看，我还知道发生在黑山口哨所的那些事。他们才什么也不知道呢！东进，别耽搁时间了，你赶快回去吧，人命关天，晚了就来不及了。” 东进说：“爸爸，好像是第一次我们爷俩见面没有争吵，第一次你没对我发脾气，我觉得这不对劲。听不见你发脾气，心里好像空落落的，我不习惯这样。” 我声嘶力竭地喊道：“混蛋！老子早就发脾气了。你还不快给我滚，滚，滚回去！” 东进仍旧呆呆地在床边站着。我这才发现，不管我怎么使劲喊，喉咙里都发不出一点声音。我想起来，但身体像焊在了床上似的，一点也动弹不了。正着急着，川川走过来了。川川告诉东进监护病房里不许家属呆的时间过久，说南征还在外面等着他呢，让他先出去。东进这才走了。 把东进交给南征我就放心了，南征会把一切事情都安排好的。南征这孩子沉稳练达，从来说话办事都很牢靠，不像东进，老大不小了还像个生荒子似的，说不准在什么时候、什么地方突然给你蹦出个事来。 看不清，还是看不清，风雪太大了。 哨所里终于出来了两个兵。显然，他们是出来寻找老兵和小鬼的。他们沿着电话线走一路喊一路，好不容易才到达老兵和小鬼最后停留的那根电线杆，找到了散落在地上的线拐子、脚蹬子和工具包。他们停下脚步，开始转着圈在四周寻找。有一次，他们已经走到砬子边了，他们站在那里拼命地呼喊着，但风雪太大了，他们的声音立刻就被风雪吹散了。 没找到，他们似乎失望了，紧张地商量了一会儿，终于向哨所的方向折了回去。 我急了，在他们后面大声地喊道：“回来！你们俩给我回来！他们就在那个石砬子下面，现在把他们救出来还来得及，来得及！” 但他们听不见，只顾低着头急匆匆往回走。不，他们简直就是在跑。 “操他娘的！”我又骂人了，我说：“你们他妈的这是临阵逃脱！要是在战场上，我非毙了你们不可……” 且慢，我看到他们进哨所后很快就出来了，后面还跟出来了一条狗。好小子，我说，这就对了，早就该把军犬带上，有它找起来就容易多了！ 那条军犬开始好像有点不对劲，尾巴耷拉着，背也有点躬。但很快，它就振作起来了，一溜小跑地向前冲去，中间一次也没停留过，径直就跑到了那根电线杆下。它在电线杆处停了下，围着散落在地下的那些东西转了几圈，仔细地嗅着，寻找着，辨认着。 我心里紧张起来，生怕风雪遮盖了痕迹和气味，使军犬难以分辨他们失踪的方向。过了好一会儿，军犬突然抬起头，毫不犹豫地朝着石砬子的方向跑去。我这才稍稍松了一口气。 军犬站在石砬子上，朝着下面狂吠起来，两个兵也跟着一起大声呼喊。但他们叫了很久，下面也没有一点声息。 天在他们的叫喊声中渐渐地黑了下来，渐渐地黑得透透的了。 必须回去了，再不回去连他们几个也危险了。两个兵唤那狗，狗不理睬他们，仍旧哀哀地朝着下面叫着，嗓子已经嘶哑了。两个兵只好去拉那狗，却拉不动。两个兵说：“走吧，铁龙，我们赶紧回去报告，让上级派人来找他们。”狗仍旧挣着不动。两个兵急了，放松狗链子想上去打它几下子。就在这时，那狗顺势挣脱了链子，突然纵身跳下了石砬。 两个兵显然彻底蒙了，过了好久，黑暗中才传来他们带着哭腔的呼喊：铁龙——！ 班长——！ 鲁生——！ 东进匆匆上了回去的火车，我忽然又有点于心不忍了。这小子连顿安生饭都没吃上，凳子还没坐热乎就走了。其实我也不想朝他发火，我本想好好嘱咐他几句的，在这个节骨眼上出了这么大的事，真够他这个当团长的呛的。但我克制不了自己，我总是这样，没见面的时候想得好好的要跟他认真谈一谈，但一旦见了面，除了瞪眼睛、发脾气我就什么也想不起来了。也不知道是从什么时候开始，我俩到一起就顶。毛毛说我和东进是同性相斥。的确，这小子和我有很多相像的地方。人呐，太相像了就没法在一起相处，不管他们之间是什么关系都没法相处，这是常理。 我从来没这样放不下心过。我仿佛看见东进前面的路上阴云密布，处处是风霜雨雪，他能走过去吗？