Chapter 21 Chapter 20 Yang Yi's Escape
Many years later, Yang Yi sat next to Lu Xiaolu, holding a PS2 controller in his hand, muttering Jack Welch's concept of wealth.When he was a teenager, he told Lu Xiaolu that he would earn a lot of money, live in a quiet place, marry a girl who could write poetry, open an orphanage, and never return to Dai Cheng.
Back then, Yang Yi was admitted to a chemical engineering college in Shanghai, but he did not go to Tsinghua University.It's useless even if he passed the exam, he didn't have enough points.
That year I sent him to the train station to go to Shanghai, and he was limping.During the summer vacation, he went to swim alone in Taihu Lake. As soon as he got out of the water, he stepped on a piece of glass and cut a hole on the spot.The wound didn't heal until September.When I arrived at the train station, my God, there was a sea of people again, just like refugees fleeing.I said to Yang Yi, do you know that last year I took Ouyang Hui to Shanghai, and it was the same scene. I lifted Ouyang Hui and stuffed it into the car door.Yang Yi said, don't mention Ouyang Hui.That year Ouyang Hui was admitted to Nanjing Normal University, and she and Yang Yi left Daicheng in two directions of the Shanghai-Nanjing line.
Yang Yi watched the crowd rushing towards the train, with screams and curses mixed in, and the sadness brought by Ouyang Hui completely disappeared.Now what he has to think about is how to climb that train, go to the Institute of Chemical Engineering, and be a Shanghainese.He said to Lu Xiaolu, can you pick me up and stuff me in too.Lu Xiaolu shook his head and said, you are dreaming.Yang was limping, with an old man's crutches, walked to the car window, and said to Lu Xiaolu, hurry up and put me in the car window before it's too fucking late.So I lifted Yang Yi up, and there were two girls in the car window, seeing Yang Yi about to get in, they screamed in unison, get down!A girl lifted a cucumber and hit Yang Yi hard on the head.Yang Yi yelled, "Fuck your mother, don't hit me."I pushed him from behind, shoved him in, and yelled, he's disabled, he's disabled.Later, he plunged into a girl's crotch, and the girl yelled, hooligan, catch the hooligan.I threw all his baggage and bedding in, and told the girl, he is not a hooligan, please take care of him on the way.The girl threw the cucumber on my head.
After Yang Yi stood up straight, he began to chat with the girl. My name is Yang Yi. I graduated from high school this year. I am from a certain chemical engineering college. What are your names?Cucumber girl said, my name is He Lina.The girl opposite said, my name is Yuan Ting, and we also just graduated and are going to Shanghai.I stood outside the car window and yelled, can you fucking wait a while to pick up girls, so you won't say goodbye to me.Yang said to the girls, this is my buddy, he is an unemployed youth.The cucumber girl looked down at me from above: Oh, jobless youth.
I said to Yang Yi, buddy, goodbye, your ideal for the past ten years is to leave Daicheng, and never be a country boy. Now I see your ideal come true with my own eyes, and I am very gratified.Yang's eyes were also wet, and he said, "Xiaolu, when you see Yu Xiaoqi, say hello to me, and that big sister Zeng Yuan."
At this time, I remembered the first time I saw him when I was nine years old. He was sitting on a yellow crocodile car, and his father was riding the car. There was a large cabinet with a mirror in the back, and there were messy sundries.Yang Yi was sitting on the side of the car, with his feet hanging outside, and was slowly eating a steamed stuffed bun.When he saw me standing under the building in Baochun New Village, he asked me, what's your name.I said, my name is Lu Xiaolu.Yang Yi said, we will be neighbors from now on.
After that, we studied in the same class, and the teacher said, Lu Xiaolu and Yang Yi, since you are neighbors, you should help each other, you should be at the same table.Yang Yi said, teacher, I want to sit with the female classmate.The teacher said, Yang Yi, there is something wrong with your ideology and morality.As a result, on the report card of that semester, in the column of conduct, the teacher specially wrote: The student is not very pure, and it is recommended to educate him more.He was only in the second grade of elementary school that year.Of course the primary school teacher was embarrassed to call him "slutty", so he used the ambiguous word "not too pure". After taking the report card home and looking at it, Yang Yi's father was also stupid. What is impure?Are the clothes too dirty?
In the summer when I was ten years old, Sanpao took Yang Yi and me to peek at the women's bathroom.It was the staff bathroom of the silk weaving factory. We followed Sanpao and climbed to the roof of the dormitory building. It was a house with a sloped roof, and it was very steep.We wore plastic slippers and walked carefully on the roof. Sanpao had laid out a raincoat on the roof. We lay on the raincoat and looked towards the women's bathroom opposite. The summer sunset made the scene in front of us backlit. Unclear, but extremely beautiful.The temperature on the roof is very high.At this time, Sanpao took out a telescope from his pocket and told us that it is the best to see with this.This is a military telescope, which was brought back from Xinjiang by Sanpao's father. It is very rare.Sanpao looked at the women's bathroom with binoculars and said, wow, I really saw a naked woman.Yang Yi said, let me have a look at Sanpao.I also said, Sanpao, lend me the binoculars quickly.Sanpao said, I can lend you the telescope, but you are going to buy me ice cream.We said, I will buy it for you after reading it.Sanpao doesn't believe us, let's go buy it right away, and then we can watch it.
It's such a pity that I finally ran to the roof and couldn't see anything on such a beautiful summer evening.I had nothing to do with Yang Yi, so I had to climb down the dormer window to buy ice cream for Sanpao.When we were going downstairs, a female worker who had just taken a shower came up with a washbasin in her hair and shouted to us, kid, don't run around.We rushed downstairs and collected all the change, which was only enough to buy two ice creams.Ice cream was a very luxurious thing in those days, and it was not easy for us to eat popsicles with severed heads.Looking at the white ice cream and smelling the aroma of cream, Yang Yi and I couldn't help it.In fact, we could share one ice cream and contribute the other to Sanpao, but we were too hungry, and it would be troublesome to climb to the top of the building, so we licked the ice cream and went home.
Poor Sanpao was waiting for us on the roof. At first he was very happy. Today he saw a shirtless woman and could eat ice cream at the same time. Later, the female workers in the telescope put on their clothes and disappeared one by one. Then it got dark and the clouds fell into the sky. It was dark blue, the street lights were on, the heat was no longer on the roof, and countless mosquitoes were flying around him.Sanpao was still thinking about the ice cream, why didn't Yang Yi and Lu Xiaolu come up?Finally, he realized we were not coming up again.He had no choice but to climb down from the dormer window alone. It was too dark and he couldn't see anything clearly. He stuck his head in the window and fell into a pile of broken baskets. He was fine, but the telescope was smashed to pieces.Sanpao came home crying, when his father saw that the binoculars were broken, he picked up a stick and beat him.At this time, Yang Yi and I had already showered and squatted in the corridor to play military chess.Sanpao howled and said to us, you pay me for the telescope!We said, your brain is sick, it's none of our business, it's not our fault.
In this way, Yang Yi and I became siblings with different surnames.As I said, others are childhood sweethearts, but we can only be bamboo horses and bamboo horses.Later, when girls saw us, they mistakenly thought that we had homosexual tendencies. In fact, this was an illusion. We just experienced a cruel youth, and we loved each other a little bit as adults.Of course this kind of relationship is disgusting, but I think homosexuality is more normal than it.
In the third grade, the boys often played a game: face the base of the wall and compare who can urinate higher.At that time, no one urinated higher than Yang Yi. His unique skill was to pinch the foreskin to reveal a small opening, so that the urine could be marked.This is similar to the principle of a high-pressure faucet. He can urinate over the top of his head, but none of us can.In the meantime we'd all stay away, lest his piss get our hair wet.He used this stunt to win countless glass balls, rubber bands, popsicles, and foreign paintings.
In the fourth grade, we were teaching in the classroom, and some doctors in white coats came to the door of the classroom.The head teacher is a middle-aged female teacher. She clapped her hands and said to the female students that the female students are in physical education class today and go downstairs for a run, while the male students stay behind.The female students twittered like sparrows on the valley field, and disappeared with a huff, leaving us male students who didn't know what the teacher ordered.The doctors in white coats opened a screen in the corner of the classroom, which was also white. They couldn't see any tricks behind them, only heard the sound of clanging.Yang Yi leaned close to my ear and said, don't cry when you get vaccinated.
The class teacher said, please stand up now.We all stood up.The head teacher said, please take off your pants.We looked at each other in blank dismay, and we all rolled up our sleeves for vaccinations, and we never heard of taking off our pants.No one moved.The homeroom teacher pointed to Yang Yi and said, Yang Yi, you are a good classmate, take it off first, and set an example for everyone.Yang Yi took off his outer pants and hung them on his knees.The teacher in charge said that he also took off his underwear.
Yang Yi looked at his underwear, then at the teacher, and said pitifully, "Teacher, I'm not wearing anything under my underwear."The homeroom teacher was very impatient, walked up to Yang Yi, pulled down his underpants, revealing Bai Shengsheng's prongs, and said, "Everyone takes it off like this."We saw that Yang Yi was all taken off, so it didn't matter, we unbuttoned his pants together, pulled down his underpants, and stood there.The wind blows in from the window, it's chilly and comfortable.A male doctor in a white coat walked around the classroom, suddenly pointed to a boy and said, how did you develop?The boy said dejectedly, I was repeated.The doctor told the teacher in charge that he must be cut.
That day we took turns walking behind the white screen, and every time a person entered, there would be a scream.In the end, everyone was in tears and sat there with their legs crossed.Yang Yi and I also cried.To tell the truth, cutting a purse is a good thing in the first place, and it is best to cut it off as soon as you are born. If you cut it after you remember, it will leave a very painful impression.When I was inside the screen, a female doctor covered my eyes and told me not to look.I was dazed, then screamed.
After the operation, the foreskins were counted, and the doctor found that there were thirty-three boys sitting in the class, but there were only thirty-two foreskins.The doctor said that someone must have not been circumcised.The head teacher said it was impossible, there are only thirty-two boys in our class, that's right.The doctor counted again, and suddenly found a girl sitting in the corner of the last row!She is a repeater in our class, she stayed two grades, and she is of the same type as Huang Ying a few years later.She secretly sat in the back and appraised all thirty-two of our cocks.The head teacher was furious and said, why don't you go downstairs for a run.The girl said nonchalantly, I have my period today and I can't go for a run.
After the circumcision, we had a peeing competition, but Yang Yi never won again, and he finally returned to his normal state.At that time, we didn't know why we had to cut that thing, and what would be good after cutting it. We had to wait for the girls to tell us.
If you are circumcised together, you will become brothers in need.In the sixth grade, there was a girl in the class who was a student cadre. She liked Yang Yi very much and often published blackboard newspapers with him.I was also with them at the time.One day, that girl got annoyed with me and said, you don't deserve to play with me at all.I was dumbfounded, and the girl went on to say, you don't deserve to play with Yang Yi either.After hearing this, Yang Yi said to her, well, I don't think either of us deserves to play with you.Then we left the girl and went home hand in hand like a gay couple.
Yang Yi often said to me, Xiaolu, I have made many sacrifices for you.I said fuck you, I also sacrificed a lot, I was beaten and humiliated a lot.I'm not glass, it's just weird to act like I love you so much.Yang Yi said, it's really strange, they're not glass, and it's a pity that they didn't get any comfort from each other.
In 1991, in a canal on the outskirts of Daicheng, he told me that a child from a key middle school ran onto the water tower of the pesticide factory and jumped off.I can't figure out how to die because I didn't pass the university entrance exam.I comforted Yang Yi, don't worry, you will definitely be admitted to university, and then you will leave me and go to the great capital Beijing.Yang Yi said that there is no absolute thing in the world, and there are many precedents of high-achieving students failing the rankings.I asked him, what should I do if I can't pass the university entrance exam, should I repeat it.Yang Yi said that he would not repeat the exam, and that he would like to be a worker in the factory like me.I said that's fine, as long as you don't commit suicide, it's fine.
Yang Yi said that his father would not allow him to take the exam at Tsinghua University, and the universities in Beijing were not allowed to take the exam, so he had to take the exam at the Institute of Chemical Engineering in Shanghai.I said, congratulations, I also inherit my father's career, and we will be colleagues in the future.He was very depressed when he heard this. He said, Xiaolu, I want to leave Daicheng forever, a place where bullying runs rampant.
That summer we went together to go under the water tower of the pesticide factory, and the water tower stood straight up to the sky.Passing through the long grass, the road narrows and the smell of the chemical plant intensifies. The abandoned steel bars strewn about in the grass look like the bones of prehistoric animals.Yang Yi said he wanted to climb up, it was so damn tall, he made a bet with himself, if he could climb up, he would apply for Tsinghua University, if he couldn't climb up, then he would resign himself to fate.At that time, his eyes were serious. Once his perennially sly eyes became serious, it meant something was going to happen.
He climbed the steel ladder on the water tower and said, it was so hot.Lift your legs and climb up.In the middle of the air, he looked at me and saluted with one hand.The sun in the sky dazzled my eyes, and after that, all I could see was a wriggling shadow.I shouted, hey, if you jump down like him, I will lose you a pack of Hongtashan.These words stimulated Yang Yi, and he let out a long whistle in mid-air.At that moment, I even had a premonition that he would really fall, like a dead ghost, turning into a free fall, sticking to his own shadow along the light trail.
Later, a group of workers walked by from the other side of the road. When they saw Yang Yi, they applauded loudly and attracted the cadres in the factory.The cadres were horrified. Not long ago, someone jumped into the water tower and died, and the safety bonus in the factory was lost. Why is there another person who is not afraid of death?The cadres yelled at me from below and grabbed me too.Suddenly a group of black shadows flew down and landed on everyone's heads. It turned out to be Yang Yi's slippers.I was in a hurry, and shouted at Yang Yi by pulling my neck, "Fuck it, come down quickly, I'm going to be arrested and sent to the security department."
Later, he climbed down tremblingly, with a lot of rust on his clothes. The cadres grabbed us by the back of the neck and drove us out of the factory.I asked Yang Yi if he had climbed up.He shook his head in frustration and said that a cover and a lock were added to it, and the food would stop halfway through the climb.
Walking back along the wasteland full of dandelions, he told me that when he climbed to the middle of the sky, the wind was very strong, and he could see the dark roofs of the factory warehouses, as well as the reactors and pipelines in the distance, and the weeds condensed into A gray-green color, the world is like a discarded circuit board.He thought it was amazing and wanted to stop and watch it, but the ladder was very hot, and the skin on his palm might be burned off if he stopped.So he can only climb up.He heard a group of workers shouting below, and he didn't know what they were shouting. At such a high altitude, he hung alone, and there were only some inexplicable sounds in his ears, which seemed to be low-frequency sound waves.Then he discovered that the water tower was locked near the top.In fact, the iron lock itself does not prevent others from committing suicide. Even if they jump off the ladder, they will still die. But Yang Yi didn't come to die, he just wanted to climb up to make a wish.He tried to push the cover off with his hands, but the thing was welded so firmly that it wouldn't budge.He stopped there, grasping the iron ladder with both hands, feeling the burning heat, so he had to come down.
I didn't know that at the time, he and the girl made an agreement that one would be admitted to Tsinghua University and the other to be admitted to Peking University. They would leave Daicheng together and go to other cities together.In fact, there are other universities in Beijing, and they don't have to work so hard.It's also naive, no way.Later, the girl broke up with him, she went to Nanjing, and he went to Shanghai.
Before going to Shanghai, Yang Yi said that he would love Ouyang Hui forever, because he gave her his virginity and got a virgin in return.It's a pity that Ouyang Hui no longer cares about him. He went to her several times during the summer vacation, but her attitude was cold. Finally, Ouyang Hui told him: "I don't love you anymore, don't you understand?" clear.Ouyang Hui explained: "Actually, you are not the person I love at all, but at that age, I fell in love with you." Yang Yi didn't understand this sentence, because it should be a thirty-year-old woman Said it, and she was only nineteen years old.I thought, if a girl writes poetry, she might be able to speak thirty-year-old words at the age of nineteen, right?It's a pity that Yang Yi is only nineteen, and there are still almost ten years before he turns thirty.He feels that sex cannot be forgotten, that thing is burned in his mind, how can he stop loving if he doesn't love it?Ouyang Hui said: "You will figure it out later. You can go."
I sent him on the train that day and watched him flirt with two girls eagerly. I thought, all these incomprehensible things, love and sex, following and defecting, can be left to find the answer later.I am very proud of Yang Yi.The train took him away from Daicheng.I turned around and walked out of the platform. There was still a sea of people just now, but suddenly it became empty, with several shoes scattered on the ground. The train station is a bit like a movie theater after the show.
When I got tired of wandering around in the world, I thought of Yang Yi and went to the Chemical Engineering College in Shanghai to look for him.It was a long time ago, I was carrying a broken bag, my hair was disheveled, and I was penniless.I saw Yang Yi lying in the dormitory, wearing only a pair of underpants, also disheveled and penniless.He waved to me feebly and said, Xiaolu, I have spent all my money and haven’t eaten for two days, can you buy me a steamed stuffed bun.I said I had no money left, and I planned to borrow some from him.Yang Yi said, do you have any cigarettes? You will never be without cigarettes.I took out the last cigarette from my pocket, lit it, took two puffs myself, and stuffed it between his fingers. I said he was stupid, he would not borrow money if he had no money.Yang Yi said, everyone in our dormitory is living in debt.When I saw the dormitory, it was like a kennel. I don't even need to describe it. Anyone who has studied in college knows it.A dying person was lying on each of the beds, all wearing only underpants, and said to Yang Yi: Yang Yi, there is a cigarette, give me a smoke.Yang Yi said, do you still have to go to today's class?The brother in the lower berth said, I can’t walk anymore, and I will faint four hundred meters away from the classroom because of hypoglycemia.Yang Yi said to me, Xiaolu, help me go to a certain classroom, and promise me when I roll my name, and then you go and get me something to eat, bark is also fine. At that time, I gloated and laughed wildly, Yang Yi, is this your fucking ideal? After leaving Daicheng, you did not become a Shanghainese, but a beggar.Yang Yi didn't have the strength to argue with me, he just said weakly, don't slander intellectuals. I shook my head, ran to the classroom, followed what he said, promised to roll call, and then slipped out.It's very troublesome, I have no money, where can I get food?Suddenly, I saw a handkerchief on the campus path, it belonged to a girl. I picked it up and walked forward to see a key.After catching up again, I saw a two-yuan note floating out from under a girl's clothes.This short journey following her drove me nuts, oh god, two dollars.With the money in my pocket, I bought four solid steamed buns, gnawed all the way back to the dormitory, and gave Yang one or two steamed buns, his eyes turned green.I took a sip of water, and when I looked up, there was only one steamed bun left in his hand. I took another sip of water, and there was only a small piece of the other steamed bun left.The brother in the lower berth was still shouting: Yang Yi, give me the remaining piece, please, I'll exchange it with you with a mobile phone. After eating, I can finally get out of bed and walk around.At this time, a chubby student cadre ran in and said, why haven't you filled out the election of people's representatives?Yang was furious and said, my stomach is empty and I haven't had enough food, so I choose a fucking representative.Raise your hand and write a Madonna on the ballot.The brother in the lower berth said, Yang Yi, help me fill it in too.Yang Yi said, who do you choose.The brother in the lower bunk said, Clinton.Another lying down said, I choose Doraemon.The student cadre said, "You three representatives are all invalid votes." I asked Yang Yi, how the hell are they so poor, waiting to starve to death.Yang Yi said, it’s not that they are poor, but that the remittances from their families have not been sent. The poverty of college students has nothing to do with whether their families have money. I spent all my money.If I had come to him half a month earlier, I would have lived like a rich man. In the evening we sat on the lawn of the university, surrounded by men and women in love, holding their heads and gnawing their mouths.I asked Yang Yi if he had a girlfriend, and Yang Yi said no. He was already in his third year of college, and he had been neglected for a long time. When he was in high school, he was very nourished.Speaking of this, I couldn't help thinking of Ouyang Hui, and sighed.Yang Yi never saw her again after he was admitted to university.He asked me if I had a woman, but I didn't tell him lest he die of jealousy.Chatting and chatting that day, the time passed so quickly, we were hungry again, and the addiction to cigarettes was unbearable.Yang Yi took me to the school's poetry club, saying that there were many girls there and it was easier to borrow money.I just laughed at him. After all, he has received a good enlightenment education, and he is still tied to a female poet. That day, I witnessed a poetry reading.It was a rather big classroom, and it was said that this was the poetry club.There was a poet reciting in front, and there were more than 20 poets lining up in the back. Girls surrounded them, their eyes shining with happiness.Behind them is a group of poor people with hunched bodies, like idlers in the countryside, clasping their hands, shrinking their necks, and showing stupid smiles.Yang Yi also had such an image.On the contrary, although I am not a college student, I still look a little heroic.A female student was reciting aloud above, and the idlers below were laughing, as if they were watching a shadow play. Later, a poet recited: "The peasants in winter are all my father." As soon as he finished reading this sentence, he heard wild laughter from below, and Yang Yi shouted, don't read crooked poems, be careful your mother will cut you off.I looked at Yang Yi and felt a little ashamed.A girl turned her head and said to Yang Yi, she hates it, if she doesn't understand the poem, get out.Yang Yi said coldly, I am stupid, I can only understand storytelling.I quickly apologized to the girl, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, his brain was stimulated, his ex-girlfriend was also a poet, and she dumped him, so he can't listen to this now.After speaking, he quickly dragged Yang Yi away. Yang Yi and I were walking on the campus road, his neck was still curled up, his shirt was open, his nipples were exposed, and a pair of plastic slippers were kicking and kicking on the ground.It looks very Wei-Jin demeanor, but it's actually bullshit.I said, fuck, I didn't expect you to become like this. I thought you were doing research in the laboratory every day. How the hell are you going to college.Yang Yi said, you don’t understand now. There are two types of people in the university. The first type is the elite who study hard and get in early, and can find a good job as soon as they leave school. The second type is like me, the underworld. Handsome guy, you don't need to study, you can play for four years anyway.At this moment, I realized that the Yang Yi in front of me was no longer the boy who climbed the water tower and vowed to take the Tsinghua University entrance examination. At night, we were all starving and drank a lot of water. Later, Yang Yi said, no matter, Xiaolu, you finally came to see me once, I can't let you go hungry, for you, I will take a risk.He returned to the dormitory, fished out a watermelon knife from under the pillow, rolled it up with a newspaper, and said to me, let's rob middle school students. I followed him out of the school, walking all the way to persuade him not to do this, and he will be sentenced to ten years in prison if caught.Yang Yi said don't worry, he went to the university after the snatching, and no one would recognize us in the dark.Remember when we were robbed?None of the gang of hooligans ever got caught.When we got to the street, it was dark and deserted, and there were no shadows of the middle school students. It was night and the middle school students had all gone home.I said, fuck it, it's the wrong time.Yang Yi said it doesn't matter, there is a medical school nearby, all girls, many of them will come to the School of Chemical Engineering to play at night, pick the one who is alone.I said, you are really devoid of humanity. We squatted near the health school for more than half an hour, and sure enough, a lonely girl came over, and she was the only one on the whole street.Yang Yi flashed out from behind the telegraph pole, and I flashed behind the girl, outflanking her.Yang Yi said, little sister, borrow some money.The girl pointed at Yang Yi and said, you want to scare me to death.Yang Yi said, don't shout, I'm carrying a watermelon knife, and I'll borrow fifty yuan.The girl said, fuck, I only have 20 yuan meal ticket.Yang Yi said that meal tickets are also fine.When I got it, it was a meal ticket from the School of Chemical Engineering, so I was very happy.The girl said, that's interesting, I'm just a partner in your school.Yang Yi said, hey, how do you know that I am from the School of Chemical Engineering.The girl said, fuck it, you look like a college student, and there are no boys in our health school.Just like that, Yang Yi thanked the girl, asked her to leave a call, said that it would be returned the next day, and then ran away.The girl may have been fascinated by him, and she didn't even call out. Back at school, we exchanged our meal tickets for two packs of cigarettes, went to eat something, and left some meal tickets for breakfast tomorrow.I slept with him on the same bunk at night, and he reminded me not to have nocturnal emission on his ass like before, he has a bigger temper than me now, and he might kill me for it. In the middle of the night, I lay on the bed with my chest against the wall and my back against Yang Yi, thinking of everything we experienced when we were young, the hooligans in Daicheng, technical schools and key middle schools, Ouyang Hui, Yu Xiaoqi, Zeng Yuan, disabled, Xiaopi , and the dead Lao Ding and his two wives.All the faces were floating on the surface of my consciousness, no room for thinking, just letting them float by.I didn't tell Yang Yi that I often suffer from insomnia now, and people with insomnia don't have nocturnal emission. I asked Yang Yi, do you still love Ouyang Hui? Yang Yi said, I don't know either.He asked me again, do you still love Yu Xiaoqi? I said, if I can find her one day, I will know whether I love her or not.
Speaking of Ouyang Hui. When Yang was a freshman and a senior year, I went to the School of Chemical Engineering to look for him again, but I couldn't find him.He is missing.The brother in the lower berth told me secretly that Yang Yi ran outside the school to play video games, and met two hooligans, and ended up fighting.With one against two, of course it is not someone else's opponent.Yang Yi's face was covered with blood, he ran back to the dormitory, drew out the watermelon knife and rushed back.After an hour, he ran back covered in blood, changed his clothes and left.It is estimated that they chopped people down, but I don't know if they were killed or not. I called home and asked my dad to go upstairs to ask, and the answer was: Yang Yi didn't come home.So I lay on his bed, this bird bed, the weather in November, the bottom was still covered with straw mats, the quilt on top gave off a sour smell, the bed was piled with Gu Long's martial arts novels and a large number of obscene magazines, not only The pictures are obscene, and there are legal magazines that specifically describe rape and murder. I really don't know how hungry he is.I lay in a pile of unidentified things with my clothes, sleeping, and waiting for him to come back. He never came back and slept until the morning of the third day when someone shouted at me: "Yang Yi, someone is looking for you!" I stuck my head out of the bed and saw a woman standing at the door of the dormitory, carrying a backpack. Wearing a beret, very handsome.I was bleary-eyed and I almost rolled out of bed when I saw that face. "Xiao Qi?" The woman said, "Hey, why is it you? Where's Yang Yi?" I rub my eyes.I finally saw clearly that she was not Yu Xiaoqi, but Ouyang Hui.I mistook her for Yu Xiaoqi, and she also found out that I was not Yang Yi, but Lu Xiaolu. I was so sad that I jumped out of bed, and a few obscene magazines came down with me.Ouyang Hui walked in, picked up the magazine and looked at it, her face was a little hot, and said mockingly: "He reads this every day now?" I said: "No, he also reads some world famous books." I grabbed a copy.Ouyang Hui said: "The bed is like a kennel." I told Ouyang Hui that Yang Yi ran away and something happened, but it seemed that the problem was not serious. I lay on this bed for three days and no police came to find me.It's just that it's not easy to find him, we have to wait for him to come back by himself.Ouyang Hui said: "I didn't come to look for him, I just passed by and took a look." She came to play in the poetry club of the School of Chemical Engineering, and she also wrote poems, remembering that Yang Yi was also studying here, so she found her.Ouyang Hui's temperament is quite different from before. In the past, she was just a flat-chested girl in an orange school uniform. After a few years, she became mature, with an indescribable smell on her body, as if she was out of tune with this world. Her expression was so calm again.I think the world keeps a balance like this, people we don't know will know one day, and people we once knew will become unknown. Ouyang Hui said: "Just to see him, I haven't seen him for several years." I said: "He has always wanted to see you, but he hasn't found a girlfriend yet." Ouyang Hui said: "Okay, since I'm not here, I'm leaving." Obviously she didn't want to talk to me more.I sent her to the downstairs of the dormitory, and she said: "By the way, greet your cousin for me. I like her very much." I said sadly: "My cousin had an accident and was killed." Ouyang Hui was stunned , took a deep breath and said, "Really? That's too... too regrettable." Before leaving, she took out a book from her backpack and said, "This is my recently published collection of poems, you give it to Yang Yi." I took the book and read it. It was called "My Journey" .I turned to the author’s introduction, and only then did I know that standing in front of me was a somewhat famous poetess who had published many works, was a talented woman from Nanjing Normal University, and was classified into a certain genre of poetry.Ouyang Hui smiled and said: "Books printed at your own expense, a little self-inflated, don't take it seriously." I said: "Too modest." she left.I just sent her to the door of the dormitory. I don't think I will see her again in this life, including Yang Yi. She came to say goodbye to him, or just came to take a look out of curiosity. Of course, those few obscene magazines A bed like a kennel is enough to satisfy her curiosity.Unfortunately, the person she met was me, and I replaced Yang Yi to say goodbye to Ouyang Hui. Two days later, when I was sleeping on the bed in the middle of the night, someone suddenly touched me and startled me. The person was also very scared and said, "Who is it?"I saw that Yang Yi was back.He was very dirty, but his hair was clean-shaven, and he was completely bald.He told me that when he went out with a watermelon knife that day, he waited outside the game room, waiting for the two people to come out. He swung the watermelon knife in the middle of the night and slashed wildly. He heard a series of screams, and the wounded rats ran away.He threw the knife into the river, returned to the dormitory, changed his clothes and slipped away.He ran to his relative's house in Hangzhou, hid for a week, then called back to school, and found that the other party did not report the crime, so he slipped back.At this time, he was very proud and said, "I finally killed someone in this life." I just told him that the cutting was at an untimely time, and he missed the meeting with Ouyang Hui.I dug out the girl's poetry collection from a pile of obscene magazines, solemnly handed it over to him like paying off a debt, and threw him a cigarette at the same time.I think he needs a cigarette right now.
After Yang Yi graduated from university, he originally wanted to find a job in Shanghai, but his father insisted that he return to Daicheng. He was only a son, so he was worried about being outside.As soon as Yang thought about it, he really went back.He couldn't find a decent job in Shanghai, so he might as well go home. After returning to Daicheng, he bought a game console and squatted in the house every day to play games.In the battle of tanks, tens of thousands of virtual tanks were blown away.This game is a two-person team, he couldn't find a partner, and I was wandering outside, so he called the stupid egg and taught the fool to play the game.An unemployed college graduate and an equally unemployed idiot played tanks wildly in front of a black and white TV every day. At noon, when they thought they were hungry, they would eat some instant noodles, get a bowl for the idiot, and continue playing after eating.Sometimes the idiot ran outside the kindergarten to see the scenery, and Yang Yi played the tank alone, feeling very lonely, so he rushed out to pull the idiot back and begged him to play with him.A fool is not willing to play with him every time, a fool also has dignity, and there are times when he gets bored. One day, Yang Yi dropped the controller of the game console and followed his father to report to the pesticide factory. In that dilapidated, old, strange-smelling chemical plant, he saw the water tower where someone committed suicide once again, recalling that year, when he climbed up, Lu Xiaolu looked at him from below.In mid-air, he felt that the world was like an integrated circuit board, the hot sun and the hot iron frame almost made him unable to control it, and the slipper fell into the grass instead of him. 这时他不再愤怒了，进了农药厂就没什么好愤怒的，拿西瓜刀砍过人又有什么用？这里很多人都使用过这种兵器，没什么大不了的。他再牛逼，也还是一个业余的砍人选手，玩票而已，甚至连玩票都嫌迟。 他顿悟了，进了工厂就下车间倒三班，第一年在昏天黑地中度过。他用甜言蜜语征服了车间里的阿姨和车间外面的领导，第二年调到供销科，开始贩卖农药。很多人都认为，他很适合去做销售，大概世界上只有路小路知道他其实是个忧郁的人。 在盛夏的时候，他去外省，那些名字听上去都差不多的县城。从城市再到乡村，滚烫的阳光和滚烫的中巴车，车子里有人，有鸡鸭，有一只散发着膻味的山羊。他没有歧视山羊，因为他本人身上也散发着膻味。夜里住在县城的招待所里，被子好像是被山羊睡过的，他也无所谓，因为这条被子比他大学时代的还略为舒服一点。 也不知道走过了多少县城，卖掉了多少农药，他像一个古代的货郎，游走于乡村之间，陪农科站的人喝酒，在麦田里和农民聊天，把宣传横幅挂在县城的商店门口，给生病的农作物开处方，甚至在卫生所帮忙抢救那些喝药自杀的妇女。渐渐地，他对于丰收有了一种感情，他憎恨大水，因为庄稼都死了，农药也就卖不出去了。他喜欢看到农民丰收的神情，在他的故乡戴城，人们把拥有这种表情的人统称为乡逼。 他在县城里遇到过流氓，那不是戴城拿着西瓜刀和铁管斗殴的小混混，而是乡下的黑帮，用杀猪刀抵住他的腰，说着他完全听不懂的方言，把他洗劫一空。这让他回忆起初中时代，和路小路一起被人打劫的事情，很相似，但是更恐怖。他曾经变成一个同样凶暴的人，抡着西瓜刀把少年时代所受的屈辱都报复回去，但是，这没用，这仍然只是噩梦的一部分。 他在某个县城和一个老板做生意，货到付款，一卡车的农药运到老板那里，钱却迟迟不给他。一百万啊。他蹲在老板家门口，苦苦央求着。老板说，你再等一个月吧。他打电话回厂，厂里说，要不到钱，你就提着脑袋回来吧。他在那个县城呆了两个月，打电话给大学同学，学习了制造汽油弹的方法，拎了两个土炸弹去找老板。后来他全身回到厂里，钱也要回来了，成了全厂的英雄、当年的楷模，连他爸爸都要向他学习，这种为了集体不怕坐牢不怕炸死的精神。 揣过了汽油弹，他又有点恢复自信了，他没想到自己也会变成个讨债队的，但这感觉还不错。有一次跟着科长去某个县城讨债，十万块钱。对面坐着个乡下土老板，杨一拍着桌子说：“我会造汽油弹，你想想清楚。”乡下土老板怕了他，给了他们十万块的现金，让他们写收条。科长揣着那包钱出门的时候非常害怕，杨一不明所以。走出去五百米，后面走过来一个蒙面大汉，手拿一杆猎枪，对着科长的后脑勺轰了一枪，抢了钱就走。杨一站在街上，看见科长的直挺挺地倒下，脑浆和鲜血向着正前方甩出去。他不敢回头，他怕一回头就他妈的变成盐柱，他只能看着科长的死尸。有一只苍蝇轻快地飞来，落在杨一的头上，苍蝇脑子也有病，放着满地的脑浆和鲜血不去舔，为什么要爬到活人头上？This is the beginning of the nightmare. 关于火药枪轰脑袋的事情，他变成了一个失忆症，别人问他，他都想不起来了。在某个深夜他把这件事讲给路小路听，说着说着就哭了。这时路小路想起老丁：在你们年轻的时候，并不是只有逃命这一条路。路小路想，老丁的意思是要我们把命运掌握在自己手中，但是，假如是有人用枪指着你的脑袋，或者是指着你身边人的脑袋，这时，选择逃命也不那么丢人吧。我愿意自己的奔跑是一种追寻，而不是逃命，但这仅仅是我愿意。 那一年杨一走到了不知什么地方，揣着他的农药宣传单，带着他的《害虫防治指南》。他住在一个小旅馆里，不知有谁扔了几份过期杂志在茶几上，他拎起来看，其中有一份是诗刊。旅馆的茶几上居然有诗刊，也真见鬼了。他翻开杂志，用一种嘲笑的表情浏览着，后来他看见有一个名字，他曾经非常熟悉，为之念念不忘。可那女孩儿的名字前面印着：四川。她明明是戴城人，怎么会跑四川去了呢？她是他从前遇到的那个人吗？ 夜里他半躺在旅馆的床上，像路小路十七岁那年一样，就着昏暗的灯光读女孩儿的诗，内心的迷惘就像杂志上的字。这个陌生的县城，他为什么会来到这里？为什么会在这里遇到她的诗？ 后来有人敲门，他以为是查房的，拉开门，外面闪进来一个女的，爆炸头，红衬衫，一对大胸将他逼退三步。女的说，一百块，好不好。杨一看着这种装束，多年前的恐惧感忽然当头砸下来。太他妈的可怕了。然而，与此同时，他感到下面起了一种反应，这是他少年时代经常体会到的，同桌的你，幽幽的香味飘到我的鼻子里，简直就像条件反射。 杨一给了她一百块，女的说，先生你真爽气，我还第一次遇到先付钱的呢。杨一就把钱塞到她衬衫里。女的返身锁门。做事的时候，女的说，哇，亲爱的你好威猛。杨一说，我小时候割过包皮的，所以威猛。女的骑在他身上，问，先生你有多久不近女色了。杨一想了想说，五六年吧。 后来他说，我认识你的，你叫黄莺，你还认识我吗，我叫杨一。女的说，先生你真会说笑话，我不叫黄莺，我叫飘飘，不过你要是把我当成那个黄莺，我也无所谓。杨一说，公判大会的时候我见过你的，现在放出来了。女的说，噢哇，亲爱的，温柔点。 还是就着昏暗的灯光，杨一仔细端详她的脸，他不能确定这个人是否就是当年的黄莺，在她的头颅一侧，是一本摊开的诗刊，他又去看那些字。觉得自己很可笑，就闭上眼睛专心地消费。 做完这些事情，女的坐在床上，要了根烟。杨一陪着她抽烟。女的捞起床头的诗刊说，你是文化人啊，还读诗。杨一说，你他妈的别去碰，放下。后来他又说，我真的认识你的，不过呢，有可能你患上了失忆症，也有可能我精神分裂。女的穿上她的红衬衫，说，亲爱的你真有意思，我给你留个拷机号码，下次你还找我。 那女的走了以后，夜晚还没有结束。时间真是漫长啊，除了衰老特别迅速，其他一切都是慢悠悠的，好像永远都过不去。他想，在我们的一生中，难道就是用这种方式与往事干杯的吗？ 第二天中午，杨一走出旅馆。天气非常热，县城的景色让他想起了很多年以前的戴城，如今的戴城已经变成了一座现代化城市，街上不再有流氓，河里也不再有游泳的少年。在酷烈的阳光下，他忽然想起，也是这样一个夏天，躲在家里和女孩儿亲昵的场景。那已经太遥远了，这中间隔着一个漫无边际的人世。那女孩儿说，在夏天我们度过了仅有的十年，她要去这人世面壁思索，她说亲爱的不要在北方定我的棺材。杨一站在县城荒凉的马路上，忽然回头张望，好像那女孩儿在遥远的过去呼喊他。是啊，她说过，十八岁的杨一只是她在那个年纪上爱过的人，可是她当时不知道：这样的决绝本身也是一种迷失，并不存在一个可以被抛弃的过去，并不存在孤立于生命中的十八岁。 这时他想，原来，这些年在人世无目的的游荡，推销农药，讨债，逃命，也可以视之为一种追寻。只是很可悲，最后追随到了一个大胸爆炸头红衬衫的妓女怀抱里，并且她还不承认自己就是往事。那就只能承认他自己是精神分裂了。 杨一回头的刹那，是那女孩儿在人世中想到了他，还是在人世以外保佑他呢？he does not know.他只看到四个赤膊的抢劫犯，手里拿着尖刀向他走来，呈扇形的，脸上都带着残忍的微笑。假如他没有回头，他将会被人捅死在县城的小街上，他追随她的旅程就此告终。他只能将这看作是一种天意。 他非常恐惧，恐惧得近乎迷惘，后来是那女孩儿在遥远之处扇了他一个大嘴巴，把他打醒了。 杨一撒腿就跑。
When I got tired of wandering around in the world, I thought of Yang Yi and went to the Chemical Engineering College in Shanghai to look for him.It was a long time ago, I was carrying a broken bag, my hair was disheveled, and I was penniless.I saw Yang Yi lying in the dormitory, wearing only a pair of underpants, also disheveled and penniless.He waved to me feebly and said, Xiaolu, I have spent all my money and haven’t eaten for two days, can you buy me a steamed stuffed bun.I said I had no money left, and I planned to borrow some from him.Yang Yi said, do you have any cigarettes? You will never be without cigarettes.I took out the last cigarette from my pocket, lit it, took two puffs myself, and stuffed it between his fingers. I said he was stupid, he would not borrow money if he had no money.Yang Yi said, everyone in our dormitory is living in debt.When I saw the dormitory, it was like a kennel. I don't even need to describe it. Anyone who has studied in college knows it.A dying person was lying on each of the beds, all wearing only underpants, and said to Yang Yi: Yang Yi, there is a cigarette, give me a smoke.Yang Yi said, do you still have to go to today's class?The brother in the lower berth said, I can’t walk anymore, and I will faint four hundred meters away from the classroom because of hypoglycemia.Yang Yi said to me, Xiaolu, help me go to a certain classroom, and promise me when I roll my name, and then you go and get me something to eat, bark is also fine. At that time, I gloated and laughed wildly, Yang Yi, is this your fucking ideal? After leaving Daicheng, you did not become a Shanghainese, but a beggar.Yang Yi didn't have the strength to argue with me, he just said weakly, don't slander intellectuals. I shook my head, ran to the classroom, followed what he said, promised to roll call, and then slipped out.It's very troublesome, I have no money, where can I get food?Suddenly, I saw a handkerchief on the campus path, it belonged to a girl. I picked it up and walked forward to see a key.After catching up again, I saw a two-yuan note floating out from under a girl's clothes.This short journey following her drove me nuts, oh god, two dollars.With the money in my pocket, I bought four solid steamed buns, gnawed all the way back to the dormitory, and gave Yang one or two steamed buns, his eyes turned green.I took a sip of water, and when I looked up, there was only one steamed bun left in his hand. I took another sip of water, and there was only a small piece of the other steamed bun left.The brother in the lower berth was still shouting: Yang Yi, give me the remaining piece, please, I'll exchange it with you with a mobile phone. After eating, I can finally get out of bed and walk around.At this time, a chubby student cadre ran in and said, why haven't you filled out the election of people's representatives?Yang was furious and said, my stomach is empty and I haven't had enough food, so I choose a fucking representative.Raise your hand and write a Madonna on the ballot.The brother in the lower berth said, Yang Yi, help me fill it in too.Yang Yi said, who do you choose.The brother in the lower bunk said, Clinton.Another lying down said, I choose Doraemon.The student cadre said, "You three representatives are all invalid votes." I asked Yang Yi, how the hell are they so poor, waiting to starve to death.Yang Yi said, it’s not that they are poor, but that the remittances from their families have not been sent. The poverty of college students has nothing to do with whether their families have money. I spent all my money.If I had come to him half a month earlier, I would have lived like a rich man. In the evening we sat on the lawn of the university, surrounded by men and women in love, holding their heads and gnawing their mouths.I asked Yang Yi if he had a girlfriend, and Yang Yi said no. He was already in his third year of college, and he had been neglected for a long time. When he was in high school, he was very nourished.Speaking of this, I couldn't help thinking of Ouyang Hui, and sighed.Yang Yi never saw her again after he was admitted to university.He asked me if I had a woman, but I didn't tell him lest he die of jealousy.Chatting and chatting that day, the time passed so quickly, we were hungry again, and the addiction to cigarettes was unbearable.Yang Yi took me to the school's poetry club, saying that there were many girls there and it was easier to borrow money.I just laughed at him. After all, he has received a good enlightenment education, and he is still tied to a female poet. That day, I witnessed a poetry reading.It was a rather big classroom, and it was said that this was the poetry club.There was a poet reciting in front, and there were more than 20 poets lining up in the back. Girls surrounded them, their eyes shining with happiness.Behind them is a group of poor people with hunched bodies, like idlers in the countryside, clasping their hands, shrinking their necks, and showing stupid smiles.Yang Yi also had such an image.On the contrary, although I am not a college student, I still look a little heroic.A female student was reciting aloud above, and the idlers below were laughing, as if they were watching a shadow play. Later, a poet recited: "The peasants in winter are all my father." As soon as he finished reading this sentence, he heard wild laughter from below, and Yang Yi shouted, don't read crooked poems, be careful your mother will cut you off.I looked at Yang Yi and felt a little ashamed.A girl turned her head and said to Yang Yi, she hates it, if she doesn't understand the poem, get out.Yang Yi said coldly, I am stupid, I can only understand storytelling.I quickly apologized to the girl, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, his brain was stimulated, his ex-girlfriend was also a poet, and she dumped him, so he can't listen to this now.After speaking, he quickly dragged Yang Yi away. Yang Yi and I were walking on the campus road, his neck was still curled up, his shirt was open, his nipples were exposed, and a pair of plastic slippers were kicking and kicking on the ground.It looks very Wei-Jin demeanor, but it's actually bullshit.I said, fuck, I didn't expect you to become like this. I thought you were doing research in the laboratory every day. How the hell are you going to college.Yang Yi said, you don’t understand now. There are two types of people in the university. The first type is the elite who study hard and get in early, and can find a good job as soon as they leave school. The second type is like me, the underworld. Handsome guy, you don't need to study, you can play for four years anyway.At this moment, I realized that the Yang Yi in front of me was no longer the boy who climbed the water tower and vowed to take the Tsinghua University entrance examination. At night, we were all starving and drank a lot of water. Later, Yang Yi said, no matter, Xiaolu, you finally came to see me once, I can't let you go hungry, for you, I will take a risk.He returned to the dormitory, fished out a watermelon knife from under the pillow, rolled it up with a newspaper, and said to me, let's rob middle school students. I followed him out of the school, walking all the way to persuade him not to do this, and he will be sentenced to ten years in prison if caught.Yang Yi said don't worry, he went to the university after the snatching, and no one would recognize us in the dark.Remember when we were robbed?None of the gang of hooligans ever got caught.When we got to the street, it was dark and deserted, and there were no shadows of the middle school students. It was night and the middle school students had all gone home.I said, fuck it, it's the wrong time.Yang Yi said it doesn't matter, there is a medical school nearby, all girls, many of them will come to the School of Chemical Engineering to play at night, pick the one who is alone.I said, you are really devoid of humanity. We squatted near the health school for more than half an hour, and sure enough, a lonely girl came over, and she was the only one on the whole street.Yang Yi flashed out from behind the telegraph pole, and I flashed behind the girl, outflanking her.Yang Yi said, little sister, borrow some money.The girl pointed at Yang Yi and said, you want to scare me to death.Yang Yi said, don't shout, I'm carrying a watermelon knife, and I'll borrow fifty yuan.The girl said, fuck, I only have 20 yuan meal ticket.Yang Yi said that meal tickets are also fine.When I got it, it was a meal ticket from the School of Chemical Engineering, so I was very happy.The girl said, that's interesting, I'm just a partner in your school.Yang Yi said, hey, how do you know that I am from the School of Chemical Engineering.The girl said, fuck it, you look like a college student, and there are no boys in our health school.Just like that, Yang Yi thanked the girl, asked her to leave a call, said that it would be returned the next day, and then ran away.The girl may have been fascinated by him, and she didn't even call out. Back at school, we exchanged our meal tickets for two packs of cigarettes, went to eat something, and left some meal tickets for breakfast tomorrow.I slept with him on the same bunk at night, and he reminded me not to have nocturnal emission on his ass like before, he has a bigger temper than me now, and he might kill me for it. In the middle of the night, I lay on the bed with my chest against the wall and my back against Yang Yi, thinking of everything we experienced when we were young, the hooligans in Daicheng, technical schools and key middle schools, Ouyang Hui, Yu Xiaoqi, Zeng Yuan, disabled, Xiaopi , and the dead Lao Ding and his two wives.All the faces were floating on the surface of my consciousness, no room for thinking, just letting them float by.I didn't tell Yang Yi that I often suffer from insomnia now, and people with insomnia don't have nocturnal emission. I asked Yang Yi, do you still love Ouyang Hui? Yang Yi said, I don't know either.He asked me again, do you still love Yu Xiaoqi? I said, if I can find her one day, I will know whether I love her or not.
Speaking of Ouyang Hui. When Yang was a freshman and a senior year, I went to the School of Chemical Engineering to look for him again, but I couldn't find him.He is missing.The brother in the lower berth told me secretly that Yang Yi ran outside the school to play video games, and met two hooligans, and ended up fighting.With one against two, of course it is not someone else's opponent.Yang Yi's face was covered with blood, he ran back to the dormitory, drew out the watermelon knife and rushed back.After an hour, he ran back covered in blood, changed his clothes and left.It is estimated that they chopped people down, but I don't know if they were killed or not. I called home and asked my dad to go upstairs to ask, and the answer was: Yang Yi didn't come home.So I lay on his bed, this bird bed, the weather in November, the bottom was still covered with straw mats, the quilt on top gave off a sour smell, the bed was piled with Gu Long's martial arts novels and a large number of obscene magazines, not only The pictures are obscene, and there are legal magazines that specifically describe rape and murder. I really don't know how hungry he is.I lay in a pile of unidentified things with my clothes, sleeping, and waiting for him to come back. He never came back and slept until the morning of the third day when someone shouted at me: "Yang Yi, someone is looking for you!" I stuck my head out of the bed and saw a woman standing at the door of the dormitory, carrying a backpack. Wearing a beret, very handsome.I was bleary-eyed and I almost rolled out of bed when I saw that face. "Xiao Qi?" The woman said, "Hey, why is it you? Where's Yang Yi?" I rub my eyes.I finally saw clearly that she was not Yu Xiaoqi, but Ouyang Hui.I mistook her for Yu Xiaoqi, and she also found out that I was not Yang Yi, but Lu Xiaolu. I was so sad that I jumped out of bed, and a few obscene magazines came down with me.Ouyang Hui walked in, picked up the magazine and looked at it, her face was a little hot, and said mockingly: "He reads this every day now?" I said: "No, he also reads some world famous books." I grabbed a copy.Ouyang Hui said: "The bed is like a kennel." I told Ouyang Hui that Yang Yi ran away and something happened, but it seemed that the problem was not serious. I lay on this bed for three days and no police came to find me.It's just that it's not easy to find him, we have to wait for him to come back by himself.Ouyang Hui said: "I didn't come to look for him, I just passed by and took a look." She came to play in the poetry club of the School of Chemical Engineering, and she also wrote poems, remembering that Yang Yi was also studying here, so she found her.Ouyang Hui's temperament is quite different from before. In the past, she was just a flat-chested girl in an orange school uniform. After a few years, she became mature, with an indescribable smell on her body, as if she was out of tune with this world. Her expression was so calm again.I think the world keeps a balance like this, people we don't know will know one day, and people we once knew will become unknown. Ouyang Hui said: "Just to see him, I haven't seen him for several years." I said: "He has always wanted to see you, but he hasn't found a girlfriend yet." Ouyang Hui said: "Okay, since I'm not here, I'm leaving." Obviously she didn't want to talk to me more.I sent her to the downstairs of the dormitory, and she said: "By the way, greet your cousin for me. I like her very much." I said sadly: "My cousin had an accident and was killed." Ouyang Hui was stunned , took a deep breath and said, "Really? That's too... too regrettable." Before leaving, she took out a book from her backpack and said, "This is my recently published collection of poems, you give it to Yang Yi." I took the book and read it. It was called "My Journey" .I turned to the author’s introduction, and only then did I know that standing in front of me was a somewhat famous poetess who had published many works, was a talented woman from Nanjing Normal University, and was classified into a certain genre of poetry.Ouyang Hui smiled and said: "Books printed at your own expense, a little self-inflated, don't take it seriously." I said: "Too modest." she left.I just sent her to the door of the dormitory. I don't think I will see her again in this life, including Yang Yi. She came to say goodbye to him, or just came to take a look out of curiosity. Of course, those few obscene magazines A bed like a kennel is enough to satisfy her curiosity.Unfortunately, the person she met was me, and I replaced Yang Yi to say goodbye to Ouyang Hui. Two days later, when I was sleeping on the bed in the middle of the night, someone suddenly touched me and startled me. The person was also very scared and said, "Who is it?"I saw that Yang Yi was back.He was very dirty, but his hair was clean-shaven, and he was completely bald.He told me that when he went out with a watermelon knife that day, he waited outside the game room, waiting for the two people to come out. He swung the watermelon knife in the middle of the night and slashed wildly. He heard a series of screams, and the wounded rats ran away.He threw the knife into the river, returned to the dormitory, changed his clothes and slipped away.He ran to his relative's house in Hangzhou, hid for a week, then called back to school, and found that the other party did not report the crime, so he slipped back.At this time, he was very proud and said, "I finally killed someone in this life." I just told him that the cutting was at an untimely time, and he missed the meeting with Ouyang Hui.I dug out the girl's poetry collection from a pile of obscene magazines, solemnly handed it over to him like paying off a debt, and threw him a cigarette at the same time.I think he needs a cigarette right now.
After Yang Yi graduated from university, he originally wanted to find a job in Shanghai, but his father insisted that he return to Daicheng. He was only a son, so he was worried about being outside.As soon as Yang thought about it, he really went back.He couldn't find a decent job in Shanghai, so he might as well go home. After returning to Daicheng, he bought a game console and squatted in the house every day to play games.In the battle of tanks, tens of thousands of virtual tanks were blown away.This game is a two-person team, he couldn't find a partner, and I was wandering outside, so he called the stupid egg and taught the fool to play the game.An unemployed college graduate and an equally unemployed idiot played tanks wildly in front of a black and white TV every day. At noon, when they thought they were hungry, they would eat some instant noodles, get a bowl for the idiot, and continue playing after eating.Sometimes the idiot ran outside the kindergarten to see the scenery, and Yang Yi played the tank alone, feeling very lonely, so he rushed out to pull the idiot back and begged him to play with him.A fool is not willing to play with him every time, a fool also has dignity, and there are times when he gets bored. One day, Yang Yi dropped the controller of the game console and followed his father to report to the pesticide factory. In that dilapidated, old, strange-smelling chemical plant, he saw the water tower where someone committed suicide once again, recalling that year, when he climbed up, Lu Xiaolu looked at him from below.In mid-air, he felt that the world was like an integrated circuit board, the hot sun and the hot iron frame almost made him unable to control it, and the slipper fell into the grass instead of him. 这时他不再愤怒了，进了农药厂就没什么好愤怒的，拿西瓜刀砍过人又有什么用？这里很多人都使用过这种兵器，没什么大不了的。他再牛逼，也还是一个业余的砍人选手，玩票而已，甚至连玩票都嫌迟。 他顿悟了，进了工厂就下车间倒三班，第一年在昏天黑地中度过。他用甜言蜜语征服了车间里的阿姨和车间外面的领导，第二年调到供销科，开始贩卖农药。很多人都认为，他很适合去做销售，大概世界上只有路小路知道他其实是个忧郁的人。 在盛夏的时候，他去外省，那些名字听上去都差不多的县城。从城市再到乡村，滚烫的阳光和滚烫的中巴车，车子里有人，有鸡鸭，有一只散发着膻味的山羊。他没有歧视山羊，因为他本人身上也散发着膻味。夜里住在县城的招待所里，被子好像是被山羊睡过的，他也无所谓，因为这条被子比他大学时代的还略为舒服一点。 也不知道走过了多少县城，卖掉了多少农药，他像一个古代的货郎，游走于乡村之间，陪农科站的人喝酒，在麦田里和农民聊天，把宣传横幅挂在县城的商店门口，给生病的农作物开处方，甚至在卫生所帮忙抢救那些喝药自杀的妇女。渐渐地，他对于丰收有了一种感情，他憎恨大水，因为庄稼都死了，农药也就卖不出去了。他喜欢看到农民丰收的神情，在他的故乡戴城，人们把拥有这种表情的人统称为乡逼。 他在县城里遇到过流氓，那不是戴城拿着西瓜刀和铁管斗殴的小混混，而是乡下的黑帮，用杀猪刀抵住他的腰，说着他完全听不懂的方言，把他洗劫一空。这让他回忆起初中时代，和路小路一起被人打劫的事情，很相似，但是更恐怖。他曾经变成一个同样凶暴的人，抡着西瓜刀把少年时代所受的屈辱都报复回去，但是，这没用，这仍然只是噩梦的一部分。 他在某个县城和一个老板做生意，货到付款，一卡车的农药运到老板那里，钱却迟迟不给他。一百万啊。他蹲在老板家门口，苦苦央求着。老板说，你再等一个月吧。他打电话回厂，厂里说，要不到钱，你就提着脑袋回来吧。他在那个县城呆了两个月，打电话给大学同学，学习了制造汽油弹的方法，拎了两个土炸弹去找老板。后来他全身回到厂里，钱也要回来了，成了全厂的英雄、当年的楷模，连他爸爸都要向他学习，这种为了集体不怕坐牢不怕炸死的精神。 揣过了汽油弹，他又有点恢复自信了，他没想到自己也会变成个讨债队的，但这感觉还不错。有一次跟着科长去某个县城讨债，十万块钱。对面坐着个乡下土老板，杨一拍着桌子说：“我会造汽油弹，你想想清楚。”乡下土老板怕了他，给了他们十万块的现金，让他们写收条。科长揣着那包钱出门的时候非常害怕，杨一不明所以。走出去五百米，后面走过来一个蒙面大汉，手拿一杆猎枪，对着科长的后脑勺轰了一枪，抢了钱就走。杨一站在街上，看见科长的直挺挺地倒下，脑浆和鲜血向着正前方甩出去。他不敢回头，他怕一回头就他妈的变成盐柱，他只能看着科长的死尸。有一只苍蝇轻快地飞来，落在杨一的头上，苍蝇脑子也有病，放着满地的脑浆和鲜血不去舔，为什么要爬到活人头上？This is the beginning of the nightmare. 关于火药枪轰脑袋的事情，他变成了一个失忆症，别人问他，他都想不起来了。在某个深夜他把这件事讲给路小路听，说着说着就哭了。这时路小路想起老丁：在你们年轻的时候，并不是只有逃命这一条路。路小路想，老丁的意思是要我们把命运掌握在自己手中，但是，假如是有人用枪指着你的脑袋，或者是指着你身边人的脑袋，这时，选择逃命也不那么丢人吧。我愿意自己的奔跑是一种追寻，而不是逃命，但这仅仅是我愿意。 那一年杨一走到了不知什么地方，揣着他的农药宣传单，带着他的《害虫防治指南》。他住在一个小旅馆里，不知有谁扔了几份过期杂志在茶几上，他拎起来看，其中有一份是诗刊。旅馆的茶几上居然有诗刊，也真见鬼了。他翻开杂志，用一种嘲笑的表情浏览着，后来他看见有一个名字，他曾经非常熟悉，为之念念不忘。可那女孩儿的名字前面印着：四川。她明明是戴城人，怎么会跑四川去了呢？她是他从前遇到的那个人吗？ 夜里他半躺在旅馆的床上，像路小路十七岁那年一样，就着昏暗的灯光读女孩儿的诗，内心的迷惘就像杂志上的字。这个陌生的县城，他为什么会来到这里？为什么会在这里遇到她的诗？ 后来有人敲门，他以为是查房的，拉开门，外面闪进来一个女的，爆炸头，红衬衫，一对大胸将他逼退三步。女的说，一百块，好不好。杨一看着这种装束，多年前的恐惧感忽然当头砸下来。太他妈的可怕了。然而，与此同时，他感到下面起了一种反应，这是他少年时代经常体会到的，同桌的你，幽幽的香味飘到我的鼻子里，简直就像条件反射。 杨一给了她一百块，女的说，先生你真爽气，我还第一次遇到先付钱的呢。杨一就把钱塞到她衬衫里。女的返身锁门。做事的时候，女的说，哇，亲爱的你好威猛。杨一说，我小时候割过包皮的，所以威猛。女的骑在他身上，问，先生你有多久不近女色了。杨一想了想说，五六年吧。 后来他说，我认识你的，你叫黄莺，你还认识我吗，我叫杨一。女的说，先生你真会说笑话，我不叫黄莺，我叫飘飘，不过你要是把我当成那个黄莺，我也无所谓。杨一说，公判大会的时候我见过你的，现在放出来了。女的说，噢哇，亲爱的，温柔点。 还是就着昏暗的灯光，杨一仔细端详她的脸，他不能确定这个人是否就是当年的黄莺，在她的头颅一侧，是一本摊开的诗刊，他又去看那些字。觉得自己很可笑，就闭上眼睛专心地消费。 做完这些事情，女的坐在床上，要了根烟。杨一陪着她抽烟。女的捞起床头的诗刊说，你是文化人啊，还读诗。杨一说，你他妈的别去碰，放下。后来他又说，我真的认识你的，不过呢，有可能你患上了失忆症，也有可能我精神分裂。女的穿上她的红衬衫，说，亲爱的你真有意思，我给你留个拷机号码，下次你还找我。 那女的走了以后，夜晚还没有结束。时间真是漫长啊，除了衰老特别迅速，其他一切都是慢悠悠的，好像永远都过不去。他想，在我们的一生中，难道就是用这种方式与往事干杯的吗？ 第二天中午，杨一走出旅馆。天气非常热，县城的景色让他想起了很多年以前的戴城，如今的戴城已经变成了一座现代化城市，街上不再有流氓，河里也不再有游泳的少年。在酷烈的阳光下，他忽然想起，也是这样一个夏天，躲在家里和女孩儿亲昵的场景。那已经太遥远了，这中间隔着一个漫无边际的人世。那女孩儿说，在夏天我们度过了仅有的十年，她要去这人世面壁思索，她说亲爱的不要在北方定我的棺材。杨一站在县城荒凉的马路上，忽然回头张望，好像那女孩儿在遥远的过去呼喊他。是啊，她说过，十八岁的杨一只是她在那个年纪上爱过的人，可是她当时不知道：这样的决绝本身也是一种迷失，并不存在一个可以被抛弃的过去，并不存在孤立于生命中的十八岁。 这时他想，原来，这些年在人世无目的的游荡，推销农药，讨债，逃命，也可以视之为一种追寻。只是很可悲，最后追随到了一个大胸爆炸头红衬衫的妓女怀抱里，并且她还不承认自己就是往事。那就只能承认他自己是精神分裂了。 杨一回头的刹那，是那女孩儿在人世中想到了他，还是在人世以外保佑他呢？he does not know.他只看到四个赤膊的抢劫犯，手里拿着尖刀向他走来，呈扇形的，脸上都带着残忍的微笑。假如他没有回头，他将会被人捅死在县城的小街上，他追随她的旅程就此告终。他只能将这看作是一种天意。 他非常恐惧，恐惧得近乎迷惘，后来是那女孩儿在遥远之处扇了他一个大嘴巴，把他打醒了。 杨一撒腿就跑。