Chapter 15 Chapter fifteen

My father, my mother, and her parents conducted joint inspections on Ye Shengnan, using revolutionary principles and violent threats to clear her mind of fashionable ideas and advanced consciousness, trying to get her back to the right path of traditional ideas, and punishing her with the money she earned from smuggling. Purchases of luxury substances were firmly resisted.Under the tremendous pressure, she seems to have settled down a lot, and she didn't make any new tricks. She calmly enjoyed the harvest of her smuggled car, and went to and from get off work like me, watched TV, ate and slept.But I knew in my heart that her heart was no longer with me and this family.On the surface we regained our calm, but we all felt unfamiliar, talked less, and even seldom reviewed the homework between husband and wife. I often thought of Lu Xun's words: If you don't explode in silence, you die in silence.I waited patiently, and whether it broke out or died, I waited for her to come first.

After half a year of this peaceful but icy life, people began to welcome the arrival of the 1990s with joy.The 1980s was a dizzying era, rising prices, panic buying, karaoke mushrooming, singing and dancing halls blooming everywhere, popularization of television, skyrocketing wages, universal gambling, prostitutes ostentatiously, clothes unbuttoned (suit) belts The neck tie (tie) has become a fashion... All kinds of new things that have never been seen or even thought about in the past emerge in endlessly, and all kinds of inconsistent and specious slogans and theories make people overwhelmed. All these have honed the nerves of the Chinese people. The skin is solid, and it has reached the state of not being surprised, coping with it calmly, looking for a word of money, and everything else is nonsense.Dedicated to earning money and getting rich to live a good life has become a social group consciousness to maintain social stability.People across the country are mentally prepared to enter the 1990s. Even if the sky falls, we will create a richer, more peaceful and happier 1990s.

The people are looking forward to it, as if to prove this point. Before the first Spring Festival in the 1990s, we were allocated a new house with two bedrooms and one living room, with a bathroom and a kitchen.My dad and the others also moved into a newly built three-bedroom, two-living, two-bathroom house in the Veteran Cadre Yard.The renovation craze was sweeping the city, and our family wasn't a part of it.My father and mother's house was decorated when they handed over the construction. Although it was a bit rough, my father and mother were still satisfied, and my father was determined not to let any bricks and stones of the house be touched: "The house belongs to the public. They only have the right to live, but not the right to change.” So their house was what it was when it was handed over, and it will still be what it was when they lived in it.

When our house was handed over, it was a rough house, and we couldn't live in it unless we renovated it ourselves.In the past, just decorating the house would have caused Ye Shengnan a lot of trouble.But now she doesn't have the slightest interest in it, she said it doesn't matter, the house is just a place to shelter from the wind and rain, just make do with it.But I can't ignore it. The traditional rule of our factory is that the man is the main party, and female employees are not allowed to allocate houses.The house is allocated by our unit, and the new one has to be handed over to the old one. The most urgent problem I face is moving and returning the old house to the unit. There are still a large number of young people waiting for the house to be built behind our group. It's a nest that is passed on from generation to generation.My house has not been handed over, but it has been distributed to one of my apprentices. The apprentice is looking forward to my moving and vacating the house all day long, but he dare not say it. Still uncomfortable.So I had to choose the cheapest tiles to pave the floor, and after installing the toilet and sink, I packed up and moved.Ye Shengnan continued to be the hands-off shopkeeper, packing her own things into a few cardboard boxes, and I packed up and tied up all the other messy things in the house, even though I had a large group of apprentices, disciples, My apprentices are ready to work for me, but no one else can do this kind of job of cleaning up the house, so I have to admit that my life is hard. After working hard for a few days, the factory sent a car. moved to a new house.Moving is a happy event, but I feel desolate in my heart, thinking that our life has already reached this stage, and the end is not far away.

December 28th, I still don't understand why Ye Shengnan chose such a good day.I was still in class, she hung up on me and asked me to have dinner at Pineapple Restaurant after get off work.I’ve heard of this restaurant. It’s an unemployed man who couldn’t make it in Taiwan. He came to the mainland to make money in the world. I don’t know why he chose our remote city. I suspect that he may have committed something in Taiwan. The city dared not show its face, so it ran here to hide.What this restaurant sells is not food, but the atmosphere, the environment, and the artificial illusion that people have entered the upper class of the upper class.I have to be convinced that the Taiwanese are really good at defrauding the mainlanders of their money. The restaurant is decorated luxuriously and elegantly. There are electric lights but no need to light candles. There is also a ghostly lady dressed in black hiding in the corner and playing the piano.Based on this alone, he dared to charge 20 yuan for a plate of scrambled rice with eggs and a few pieces of ham sausage as big as corn kernels.

Only after I went there did I realize that my attire was not to say shabby, or at least uncoordinated in this kind of place.I have been used to it for many years. I wear greasy work clothes at get off work and clean work clothes after work. The work clothes are soft and loose, casual and comfortable to wear, and you don’t need to spend money. The casual clothes bought by foreigners and the first rich in China are also No overalls are properly worn.There are quite a lot of guests here, the men are all in suits and leather shoes, and the women are all beautiful. I never thought that there are many fools or lunatics pretending to be in our unpretentious industrial city with industrial workers as the main body. They ran here to be taken advantage of by the Taiwanese.Rare things are precious, and there are suits and leather shoes everywhere, and my denim work clothes mixed with it are still in the limelight, attracting surprised eyes.

Ye Shengnan has already arrived, and she is not out of the ordinary. She is wearing a very elegant woolen dress, which looks purple-black under the dim light, and her face is much paler than usual. I guess she has put on makeup.She sat at the table by the window, took a magazine, and sat quietly pretending to be a lady.I'm quite annoyed that she asked me to come to this kind of place. The elephant is invisible and the voice is loud. People who really have weight will not come to this kind of place. tacky.My father, my mother, and many old cadres I know, senior cadres, and high-level intellectuals will never come here to pretend to be elegant.When she saw me walking in with a big grin in my overalls, she waved at me. I felt that she was still pursing her lips, but she didn't see it clearly. Maybe it was my illusion.I walked through the well-organized tables and chairs and came to her.She pretended to be elegant and nodded to the chair opposite, motioning for me to sit down.I'm a little funny, she doesn't seem to be my wife when she comes here.If she still regarded me as her husband, she wouldn't be so polite to me. In an instant, I had already decided to let her pay the bill.

"What do you want to eat? Order yourself." She pushed the menu along the table. I opened the menu and saw that I was very angry. The bottle of Qilian beer sold outside is 2.5 yuan, and it costs 10 yuan here.No matter how expensive a bottle of Tsingtao beer is at four yuan, he sells it for twenty yuan here.Taipei Casserole, Taiwan Beef Noodles, Taipei Steak, Taiwan Bitter Gourd and Pork Shredded Pork Casserole... all the dishes with the word "Taiwan" are not less than 50 yuan. It seems that the word "Taiwan" is so valuable.I concluded that these foods would not be sold at this price even in Taiwan, but the people came to the mainland.I was hesitant, even though I made up my mind to let Ye Shengnan pay the bill, I couldn't bear to let her be slaughtered too hard.

"This restaurant is so fucking dark, the knives are sharpened," I added, looking at the diners around, "there are so many idiots running here with their necks stretched to be slaughtered." I spoke quite loudly, Ye Shengnan frowned, looked around, and said in a low voice: "Speak quietly here, and don't affect others. Shouting like you is uncivilized. It doesn't matter if you kill people or not." , everyone is clearly marked with the price, which means that one family is willing to slaughter and the other is willing to suffer. Besides, people who come here do not come here to eat at his place, but to enjoy the atmosphere and elegance."

I said: "Okay, I'm a rough person, I can't feel any atmosphere here. If there is an atmosphere here, it is the atmosphere of a gentle knife. The knife is made of copper. It is rusty and smells like copper." Ye Shengnan smiled disapprovingly, that kind of smile is what I hate the most, it contains connotations of disdain, contempt, not being as knowledgeable as you, etc.She took the menu and deprived me of the right to order: "Forget it, let me order for you." She raised one hand, hooked her index finger twice, and immediately a waiter in a suit walked over like a cat: "May I ask what you want, miss?"

"A steak set, the steak should be medium rare, and a rib set, with a bottle of Tsingtao beer." The waiter quickly wrote and drew on the paper, tore off a piece of paper and pressed it on the table in a moment, and then said to us very respectfully: "Sir, miss, please wait a moment, it will be ready soon." The waiter had just left, and immediately two waitresses came over, waving knives and forks, and gave Ye Shengnan and me a small glass of red wine each. Afraid of being ripped off, I said to the waitress, "We don't want this wine." The waiter said politely: "This is an aperitif with the set meal." Ye Shengnan burst out laughing, and asked me, "Are you really never here, or are you pretending to be a fool to fool me?" I said, "I have a family and a job. Why am I so crazy here? I'm not sick." Ye Shengnan didn't say a word, her eyes drifted to the dining room, her posture and attitude were two words: disdain. I don't know what kind of illness she had today, what kind of "atmosphere" and "environment" she invited me here to enjoy.I am a common man in mainland China who lives a down-to-earth life. I have my living habits. I love to eat beef noodles. It is Lanzhou beef noodles. It is definitely not Taiwanese beef noodles, let alone California beef noodles. For me, apart from Lanzhou beef Beef noodles are not produced elsewhere.I like to smoke a cigarette after eating, and the saying that a cigarette is better than a living god after a meal is deeply rooted in my heart, especially after a day of hard work and sweating, I would like to smoke a big bowl of noodles, and then I am happy. When I smoke a tree, I really feel like I am floating.I love chatting in a high-pitched and loud voice while eating. When I sit and eat with others, I don’t say anything. It’s like meeting enemies. Talking in a soft and slow voice seems to be plotting.I use chopsticks to eat, and two wooden or bamboo sticks can handle meat, vegetables, rice, noodles, soup, dumplings, and steamed buns. When I eat a meal, I use chopsticks and knives, forks and sticks together.I love to drink tea. Drinking coffee without sugar is too bitter, but sugar is added to make my stomach sour. I believe that as long as you grow up in China, you can handle it with a cup or two of coffee occasionally. If he declares that he loves coffee and is used to it coffee, then he is a piggy with onions in his nose.To be honest, I am dismissive of the so-called "atmosphere" and "environment" here, which is artificial and hypocritical. I absolutely do not admit that this is the so-called civilization and elegance. Maybe Ye Shengnan's attitude stimulated me and gave me a rebellious mentality, maybe it was the rebellious spirit hidden in my bones that sprouted again at this moment, maybe I was just playing tricks and venting mischievously, maybe this restaurant relied on hypocritical "" "atmosphere" and "environment" openly slaughtered it and disgusted me... In short, I squatted on the chair with the neat seat cover!Ye Shengnan was dumbfounded, the waitress who brought the sizzling fried steak was dumbfounded, and the diners around were also dumbfounded, as if I was a farmer who just threw down the dung fork and broke in without knowing it.I know that I have ruined the fake civilized and elegant atmosphere carefully created here. The Taiwanese boss relies on this abstract thing to make money. "What are you doing?" Ye Shengnan finally broke out. She stopped pretending to be a lady, and stopped wearing that contemptuous but tolerant mask. Her voice was so loud that the lady playing the piano stopped. I simply and innocently told Ye Shengnan and the waiter: "I can't eat if I don't squat down." This is half the truth. My co-workers and I hardly have the habit of sitting down to eat. , squatted down and devoured it on the spot, including our factory manager, the senior intellectual who enjoys special state allowances, also squatted down to eat with us when he left the site, and told us that when he was working as a technician, just like us, he often He eats when he is squatting, and it is better to sit on the helmet when he sits down. Squatting like this with us and swallowing the rough food in the cafeteria makes him feel like he has returned to his youth.Of course, I don’t just squat to eat. If I dare to squat on a chair to eat at home, my mother and father will definitely kick me hard and immediately deprive me of the right to eat. "Humans have four major annoyances: farting in front of people, sitting on pillows, squatting on stools, and spitting on walls. These four problems are the most annoying." My dad kept telling us this way since we were young. I remember My grandfather also read this jingle.Today, I will invite everyone to hate me once in this elegant and luxurious restaurant. At this moment, the more elegant people hate me, the happier and more comfortable I will be. "You, you, what are you doing?" Ye Shengnan was confused by my behavior, and would only repeat me like this.The male waiter who took our order came over, and his attitude was still very polite: "Sir, is there any inconvenience for you?" "It's not inconvenient. It's good. Go and do your work." He smiled slightly: "But you are squatting like this to interfere with other guests' meals. Besides, it seems that you are uncivilized." I continued to pretend to be simple: "I'm an old rough worker, and I can't talk about civilized or uncivilized. Do you have a rule here that you are not allowed to squat to eat?" He was stunned and shook his head: "That's not true." "I squatted on my desk and didn't squat on other people's desks. How could it affect others? If anyone feels that I have influenced him, let him come and talk to me directly, okay?" The male waiter felt that I was not easy to deal with and didn't know how I would react if he insisted that I sit to eat, so he turned and walked away.I started to eat like this. To be honest, I knew how to eat Western food when I was five or six years old. At that time, I followed my dad to accompany the big brother of the Soviet Union. Therefore, the simple rule of knife in the right hand and fork in the left hand is not impossible for me. clear.The reform and opening-up factory introduced advanced foreign machinery and equipment, and I have also traveled to China twice with the help of foreign equipment, so I am not ignorant of these foreign rules. Ye Shengnan was restless sitting opposite me, and I said to her: "Do you know what it means that dog meat can't be served at the banquet? I am. I can only eat at places like beef noodle stalls, food stalls, and fast food restaurants. Very much. This kind of place is too restrictive, but since I am God, I can’t be wronged, I just have to make it convenient for me.” Ye Shengnan suddenly figured it out, she gave me a hard look and said: "It means that you, Dadan Yang, can do such a thing, you are not afraid of being ugly, what am I afraid of?" If you are struggling with this problem, you can eat it yourself.She asked for ribs rice, which is cheaper than my steak set meal. The boss is here. He is a Taiwanese with a head and a brain. It doesn't look like he has committed any crimes in Taiwan.He nodded first and asked me if I was not satisfied. I said I was satisfied, but the price was a bit expensive.He then asked me if I had any requirements, and I asked if I could get a 50% discount, but he said no, because if I got a 50% discount, I would lose money, but I could get a 20% discount.I didn't expect him to be very talkative, so I felt a little embarrassed. The boss pointed to my legs and feet: "Sir, you don't look good like this." I couldn't help laughing, my posture is really ugly, it doesn't look like eating, it looks like shit.But the matter has come to an end, so I can only continue to insist: "I'm really sorry for the boss, I have a leg problem, and I can't eat when I sit down to eat. Besides, there is no rule in your restaurant that you can only sit and not squat when eating, right?" The boss felt sorry for his chair cover: "It's okay to squat, but if the chair cover is dirty, it will be difficult for other guests to sit." I raised my feet to let him see: "No, I didn't wear shoes." I am very confident in my feet, and my feet will never have any peculiar smell. Workers must take a shower every day after get off work, otherwise they will be covered in greasy dust. Home.The boss frowned and grinned helplessly, and walked away with a wave of his hand. He didn't do anything to me. Satisfied with wine and food, I lit a cigarette, and the waiter immediately brought an ashtray.I waited for Ye Shengnan to speak, I knew that she had something to say, and it must be very important, but no matter how important it was, I didn't think it was necessary to say it.Why do you have to pay more than a hundred yuan when you say it? "It's already the 1990s." Ye Shengnan said thoughtfully. I think she spoke like a leader. Our factory manager, secretary, and director remind us that we are now in the 1990s, so Work hard.It seems that we are fools and don't understand that the 1980s came in the 1990s, and it seems that we didn't work hard in the 1980s and should work hard in the 90s. "Yes, it has been more than a year since the 1990s." I echoed, without any meaning, just echoing. Ye Shengnan stared at me, and I stared at her. After a while, she sighed and said, "Do you know why I invited you here for dinner?" I really didn't understand, so I guessed randomly: "Did you pay the bonus? Or is it just another business to earn extra money?" She raised her hand again and hooked her index finger again. The movement was graceful and showy, and I think she appreciated this fake movement very much.The waiter immediately approached quietly: "Madam, what's your order?" I laughed secretly in my heart, what Miss, this is Miss's mother, it seems that it is quite useful to be called Miss after a big old lady.Ye Shengnan said, "Bring me a cup of coffee." Then he asked me, "What do you want?" When I asked for a cup of tea, the waiter seemed to be trying to embarrass me, and asked me what tea I wanted, and then gave me a list of tea names, such as Tieguanyin, Dahongpao, Jasmine, Xinlongjing, chrysanthemum tea, Biluochun... I said Want the cheapest and drink good.This time the waiter was stumped, blinked and looked at me stupidly, and I said, "Is there any Laofu tea?" The waiter asked me seriously: "I'm sorry sir, what is old Fu tea?" Fucha is a brick-shaped tea brewed by local farmers. The Tibetan and Mongolian compatriots love to drink it. They call it brick tea. When we went to the countryside, we drank this kind of tea every day. Ye Shengnan knew that I was making trouble on purpose, so she said to the waiter: "Give him a cup of chrysanthemum tea, this man will be defeated." The waiter agreed to go in a hurry with relief.Soon, both coffee and tea were delivered, and the aroma of coffee mixed with the fragrance of tea comforted my sense of smell.I took a sip of the tea, Ye Shengnan frowned, I took another sip, and deliberately made a louder sound, Ye Shengnan finally criticized and corrected me: "Can you be more civilized? In foreign countries, people can't make a sound even when they eat and drink Come." I asked her back: "When did you go abroad? Which country?" I really hate that people nowadays talk about foreigners as soon as they talk about it, and I hate that today's officials always use international standards to fool the common people.Ye Shengnan has never been outside the border, and even followed foreigners as an example, as if the Party Central Committee did not call for learning from Lei Feng and changed the rules to learn from foreigners.In fact, she has no idea what is going on with foreigners.I have traveled to several countries, such as Sweden, the Netherlands, Switzerland in Europe, Canada and the United States in the Americas, all of which I used as technical backbones to participate in training and inspections when the unit introduced projects and equipment.Each time was not long and I was very nervous. Although I felt fresh everywhere when I went abroad, I didn't feel like I was in heaven.I even made a Swedish friend. He is the technical director of the company that exported dust removal equipment to us. He is less than 40 years old and his name is Harik. He has been to our company for on-site guidance many times. pick him up.He has a Chinese name: Big Rogue, which I gave him, and he appreciates this name very much.This kid said in the provincial capital that he wanted to buy a gift for his girlfriend. We took him to the handicraft store, and he bought several silk scarves of various designs and colors for his girlfriend.He told me that his girlfriend had given birth to him three children, I said that is not a girlfriend, that is your wife, he shook his head: "We live together, but we are not husband and wife." I understand, this The boy is cohabiting illegally. I scolded him at the time: "He gave you three children and you still haven't married him. You are a big hooligan." He didn't understand what I said about him, but he guessed from my expression that I said something bad, so he asked the translator what I said about him, and the translator had an idea, and told him that I said he was a romantic man, which is called a big hooligan in Chinese. He was very happy and said: "I love China, I really want to have a Chinese name, thank you, Mr. Yang, my Chinese name from now on will be Big Hooligan." laugh.The foreigners I have come into contact with are more civilized than robots, just like the big gangster Harrick. I picked him up from the provincial capital to our city. He drank a can of Coke as soon as he left the city, and then honestly threw the Coke can Holding it in his hand, it was 400 kilometers from the provincial capital to our city. We didn't stop in a hurry, but he carried the Coke can all the way to the guest house of our city government. After getting out of the car, he found a trash can and threw it into it.Let's say he is civilized, he lived with someone else illegally, had three children and is not yet married.It's hard for me to judge whether the big gangster Harlek is civilized or hypocritical. When foreigners eat, they don’t pay much attention to how it’s convenient. The left-handed fork and the right-handed knife are imitated by the Chinese. They have a lot of left-handers. When using a knife and fork, they still use the right hand to fork the left-handed knife. Eat it with your hands, ketchup, melted butter, and other soupy foods flow into your hands, and then stick out your rough tongue and lick it, which is disgusting to watch.No matter how delicious something gets on my fingers, I will wipe it off with paper or a handkerchief, and I will never stick out my tongue to lick my fingers. According to Ye Shengnan's logic, if foreigners lick their fingers, we are uncivilized.When we arrived in France, the factory invited us to have a dinner. There was a dish of spaghetti. The foreigners wrapped the noodles on the fork and then stuffed them into their mouths. The clumsy appearance was so cute.I don’t have that patience. I picked up the chopsticks that foreign friends specially prepared for us, and sucked them up like eating noodles at home. Foreigners admired me when they saw me eating like this, because I ate more happily than them. The efficiency is also much higher, so foreign friends followed suit, and no one was disgusted by the sound of sucking when I ate noodles.They regret why they can't eat such a simple but effective way to appetize.The foreigners I saw dressed casually and comfortably. It is almost impossible to see suits and leather shoes running all over the streets in a serious manner on the streets of New York. No one cares what you wear, and you don’t care what others wear.In terms of civilization, I think foreigners are more civilized than us Chinese.It's not like we often talk about other people's clothes.I was deeply impressed by a sentence the factory manager said when he took us to the United States: "Do you know what is the biggest difference between foreigners and us?" We all shook our heads, and the factory manager said, "People live for themselves and think about others. We live for others and think about ourselves." I didn't realize what he said at the time, but after thinking about it carefully, the more I thought about it, the more reasonable it became, and the more I thought about it, the more I felt that it was the case.All in all, no matter what country people are, there are good people and bad people, both civilized and uncivilized. The vast majority of foreigners are just like us Chinese, sometimes good and sometimes bad, although the skin color is different, The language of the hair is different, the living habits are different, and the cultural background is different, but they are all human beings in essence, and they are all mammals that walk upright without hair. There is no fundamental difference.There are more and more Chinese people like Ye Shengnan nowadays, and foreigners are always doing whatever they want. It's really like foreigners are living Lei Feng, and they have become a role model for us to learn from. I was thinking, so my mind was distracted, Ye Shengnan called me: "Dad Yang, what are you thinking?" I said: "I think of the big gangster, and I'm imagining whether the big gangster will squat on a chair with bare feet like me when I get here." I told her the story of the big gangster Harrick, and she knew what I said Who is the big gangster. But she became impatient: "The 1980s have passed, and the 1990s have arrived. We are rushing towards the 21st century. Your uncivilized living habits should also be changed. Don't act like a farmer." , eat something delicious and your mouth will be like a pig." I took another sip of tea loudly, and said to her, "You'd better marry a mosquito. Mosquitoes are the most civilized. If you don't hum or ha, you can eat and drink enough. It's a pity that mosquitoes eat and drink human blood. Don't follow me." I pretended to be big cloves of garlic, which one of us is with whom? Are you tired of pretending to be fake civilization? What happened to farmers? My father is a farmer, and my grandfather is an authentic farmer. Your father is also a farmer. What's wrong? You have Don’t call them dad if you can. Chairman Mao is also a farmer. He led the whole of China and defeated the American invaders. What’s wrong? How dare you not listen to what he said?” Ye Shengnan didn't respond to me directly, she added two cubes of sugar to the coffee, stirred it gently with a small spoon, looked at the coffee cup, and said softly for a while: "Yang Wei, should we really break up? gone?" I suddenly realized, no wonder she called me to this restaurant called pineapple to pretend to be civilized. Pineapple is the homonym of separation.This day has finally arrived, but the form it came in was beyond my expectation. Obviously, she wanted to create a good atmosphere to discuss life-long affairs with me. If it can be a little sad and romantic, it will be more suitable for her agree.It's a pity that I am a rough worker who doesn't know the wind and autumn, and inadvertently destroys the last romance she deliberately pursued.She doesn't understand that death cannot be beautiful, no matter where it is, a battlefield, a ward, an execution ground... and no matter how vainly people try to paint a certain kind of death with beautiful colors, death is always the end of life, and life is lost. , what good is there to say?Divorce is also a kind of death, the death of a marriage relationship, and the death of a family. Since it is death, you still want it to be a happy ending. How is that possible? Sure enough, she said: "The beginning of our marriage was a good one, and I hope our end will also be a good memory." I sneered, noncommittal.Her affected language disgusts me.This is life, not a drama stage. What we do or are doing is our own experience, not a script written by a writer. There is no need to memorize lines like memorizing lines.I set an example for her: "Didn't you mean to get a divorce? I didn't insist on leaving. You really don't need to spend this money and trouble, and come here to be taken advantage of." My frankness made her feel a little overwhelmed, and I immediately made it clear: "I have no objection to breaking up. In fact, we have already broken up. My only condition is that I can't give you the balls, and I don't care if you take everything else away." Opinion." I think she should have a clear idea of ​​the relationship between us. It is inevitable that we will come to this point. It is just a matter of time, or it is just a matter of who fires the first shot.Unexpectedly, my quick reply made her eyes full of tears: "Yang Dadan, you are really cruel, you are waiting for this day, right? You are waiting for me to bring it up first, right?" I didn't say a word, I can't deny it, I thought so, but I didn't have any malicious intentions, I was afraid that I would hurt her self-esteem by taking the initiative, as if I didn't want her anymore.I'd rather have her think she dumped me than let her think I dumped her.According to what I know about her, if she thinks that I dumped her, she will never be reconciled. In this respect, she is a bit like Cao Cao. She would rather let the world down than me.I just want her to blame me, not to create the impression that I blame her.As for me, a divorce is a divorce. If we can't get along, we will leave. There is no question of who dumps the other. Whoever dumps the other is already insignificant in the face of the catastrophe of family breakdown. "Actually, you should understand that as early as a year ago, when you ran away with braised pig's trotters, today's ending was already doomed." "You should know what I did with the braised pig's trotters. I didn't do anything to feel sorry for you, Dad Yang, or your Yang family." I'm not in the mood to discuss this with her any further.I don't know if she really didn't understand or was just pretending to be stupid. In the case of my objection, she ran with other men for more than two months. This in itself hurt me and our family. No matter what is going on between her and braised pig's feet, if she doesn't even understand this, she is not Chinese. I said to her, "Do you have the patience to explain this to the hundreds of thousands of people in the city?" She wept silently, looking very pitiful, took out one tissue after another to wipe her tears and blew her nose, and the sound of blowing her nose was very loud, attracting the attention of the people who were eating at the four tables, she forgot to be elegant and civilized. "I have no objection to the divorce. I just don't want to be divorced and I will be blamed." I said: "No one else took the blame for you, and you took the blame for yourself. Besides, with me, we both have the blame. Without me, whatever you want to do is yours." freedom, what else can I blame?" She asked me coldly, "You want a divorce that much?" I pretended to be indifferent: "You proposed the divorce, I just have no disagreement." What I said was the superficial fact, not the essential fact.My indifference and the disgust of my family members are the real motivations that forced her to file for a divorce.I feel a little hypocritical, but how can I say otherwise? Ye Shengnan called the waiter again, still in the same posture, raised his hand, hooked his fingers, and the waiter came over silently: "Pay the bill." The waiter went to the counter to pick up the bill, and I was about to pay, but Ye Shengnan said, "Let me do it, so far I'm still your wife, according to the rules, the wife pays the bill for couples, and the man pays for lovers' meals." I wanted to ask her, when she went out with braised pig's trotters, who would pay for the meal, but I didn't ask, it's all over, it's really boring to ask that kind of question again, if she thinks it's provocative, she will definitely I have to immediately have a hysterical attack on me, one more thing is worse than one less thing, this is the rule I should abide by most at present.Ye Shengnan paid the money, got up and said, "There's no point in talking about it, I'll give you the agreement tomorrow." After finishing speaking, she walked away. When I left the Pineapple Restaurant, it was already dark, and all kinds of lights polluted the night into a yellowish, dirty mess. On the top of the city government office building in the distance, the newly installed neon signs were very bright under the night. Clear: reform and innovation, forge ahead, and create a more brilliant 1990s.The slogan is too long and there are too many words, it must be a waste of electricity to write this slogan in neon lights.