Chapter 22 Dual tone

Tapir dream and Zhang Ailing went to buy shoes together.When the two are together, no matter what they set out to do, they always end up eating. "What do you eat?" Tapir Dream asked as usual. Zhang Ailing has to think about it every time, and then she still answers the same as last time: "soft, easy to digest, and creamy." In a cafe, each person has a piece of cream cake, and another cream; a cup of hot chocolate with cream, and another cream.Although they paid for each other, they still persuaded each other very enthusiastically: "Don't add anything more? Are you really unable to eat any more?" The host asked the guests to speak.

Eileen Chang said: "I just ate, and I will catch cold when I go out, how about sitting for a while?" After sitting down, she began to talk at length; when the topic gradually became serious, she said: "You know, we This is very much like a symposium." At first① I named her "Yan Ying", but she didn't like it very much, so she restored the original name and surname "Mo Dai"—"Mo" is the transliteration of the surname, and "Dai" is the transliteration of the last name. Because of dark skin. ——Then she found out from Professor Abe that there was a dream-eating beast called "tapir" in ancient Japanese legends, so she changed "mo" to "tapist". "Tapir" can represent her personality, and her temples are so tall that she looks like a little beast with horns. "Tapir Dai" doesn't sound very pleasant to read, it's a bit like "sack". Once on the phone, someone mistook it for "Maotou", so it was changed to "Tapir Dream".This time it's a bit like "Mom".But I'm not going to tell her. ——Author's original note.The Tapir Dream speaks of a ball at Christmas: "They play a game called: Bow to the Wisest, Kneel to the Fairest, and Kiss to Thy Favorite." "Oh, many bow to you Kneeling?" Tapir Meng smiled in the twilight red light, and said as if explaining: "I wore black clothes that day, and I changed the old-fashioned bibs of Chinese children into a collar—the one you saw before. The bib has a series of pink flat peaches supported by gold threads. I really looked good that day." "Well. Did someone say you are his favorite?"? "Yeah. Everyone kisses and doesn't know who is kissing whom. It's stupid. I hate this game, but it's even more stupid if you don't join in alone. I'm the most easy-going person. That's not what a friend of mine said. ?: Now you are against communism, and in case of communism in the future, you will become the most active party member, just because you must not be an outsider.—Look at what is behind you." "Oh, palm trees," Eileen Chang turned her head Seeing that the claw-like leaves of a small potted palm tree were covering her head, she plucked it uninterestedly, "I don't feel like I'm sitting under a tree at all." The air in the cafe was very thin, Apple green walls, small pink lights, deserted and few people. "Do they all kiss on the mouth, or on the face?" "Of course it's on the mouth, they only kiss on the mouth." "Is it just a kiss on the screen?" "No "Oh." "It's disgusting, I only have a feeling of animal uncleanness." When the tapir was unhappy, it immediately changed to a thin and cold throat, which was completely different from her plump person. Not commensurate. "But I pretended to be very good. Everyone thought I was having a good time, and no one could see my disgust." "The foreigners in Shanghai are very American, and such a neck will English uses the word neck as a verb, specifically referring to hugging and kissing in public, which is different from the meaning of crossing the neck in China) Is it very common for them?" "Maybe I am too old-fashioned, and I strongly disapprove of it. Not only in public, but not in public Human beings——If a man really likes you, he still thinks that you like him as much, which is unfair to him and gives him a wrong impression. As for sometimes, the other party doesn’t take you too seriously at all , and give him all kinds of freedom, and I will look even more humble." "It is really bad. What Dorothy Diss said-quoted to Ms. Diss's mailbox, seems too shallow and ridiculous, but some things Ms. That's right—she said that young people in the United States take their necks too casually, are used to it, and everything is commonplace. When they really meet the one they love, they should get great pleasure from physical contact, but emotional Deactivated, so it's for their own pleasure too..." "Maybe they can't wait--willing to get a little bit of pleasure first. I think so: if they like it, there's nothing wrong with it; If a girl doesn't need it herself, but just because of the fad, lest people laugh at her backwardness or lack of sexiness, she has to follow the crowd, then I don't think it's right." Zhang: "But if she feels the need, then Provocation is also very dangerous, if it is further led to other things, there will be more serious consequences, don't you think? Kissing has nothing to do with—""Ah, that's right."

Zhang: "If she doesn't feel the need, of course it's dangerous to force herself—the impression is too bad, and it will affect her sexual psychology in the future." Tapir" Only Russian women are the exception. If Russian girls are a little loose, it's okay But it turned out that they were getting old very fast, and they became fat like cows not long after they got married. Whether they need it or not, there will not be many Romances anyway. ——Really, Russian women can’t be looked down upon when they are older. As the old saying goes : If you are not married, first look at your mother-in-law. (Because the mother-in-law is the shadow of the old wife) If men want to do this, all Russian women will have no chance of getting married... At the banquet that day, some Russian youths made up A very short play, very interesting, called the eternal triangle. Very simple, a man and a woman walked towards each other, embraced, and said at the same time: My love! A figure flashed outside the window, and the woman was anxious and said My husband!" The man hurried to slip away, saying: My hat!It's over. "Zhang:" That's great! ——I don’t know why, when Belarus was young, there were many smart people, but I didn’t hear about them later, and they never achieved anything.The same is true of mongrels, gifted, shrewd, calculating..." (Suddenly, she becomes frightened by tapir dreams). Tapir "Yes, probably because of lack of encouragement.Society discriminates against them a bit. "

Zhang: "No, I think Shanghai is very tolerant on this point. Everything is free competition. I think it's because they have no background, don't belong to any place, and don't have a sense of place." Tapir: Maybe. Hey, I still I haven’t finished talking about their drama, and the eternal triangle in England: the wife and lover embraced, the husband ran into him when he came back, the husband was very embarrassed, made some excuses, took his umbrella, and went out again The eternal triangle is in Russia: the wife hugs her lover, the husband sees it when he comes back, he is furious, he draws three pistols from his side, gives each of them one, and he takes one for himself, pointing each at his temple, With a bang, he committed suicide at the same time." Zhang: "It's ridiculous, it looks like it!" Tapir Dream: "Jealousy is such a thing—it's impossible to think about it. For example, I and you are good friends. If I have a husband, When I mention you in front of him, I always only talk about your benefits, so of course he only knows your benefits, so he likes you very much. Then I am reluctant again.——What if it is you?" Zhang: "I You also have to be jealous." Tapir Tapir Dream: "It's inconvenient to explain. I'm bored. To my friends, I can only be cruel in other things—it can be very cruel. It's really tragic that years of relationship are gradually destroyed. In fact, it's also true. There is nothing that cannot be explained. You promise me that if there is such a day, you will tell me: Tapir, I am jealous. Be careful, don't come here!"

Zhang: (laughs) "Okay, definitely." Tapir's dream: "I can't imagine, if one day I find my husband kissing you, what will I do - foam at the mouth and make a fuss, Still as embarrassing as the Englishman was, and slipped away.—And it's a little strange, if I found my husband kissing you, I'd be jealous of you, not him—" Zhang: (laughing) "Of course it should be like this, what's so strange about it? You sometimes have a very confused mind." Tapir: (Continues to think about her) "I don't think I will make a big fuss. After the big fuss , After many days, I regretted it again, maybe I called you and said: Zhang Ai①, come and see me sometime!" Zhang: "I won't lose my temper on the spot, I probably pretended not to see it, After the guest has left, ask him what is going on behind his back. In fact, it is unnecessary to ask. I always feel that a man has a good reason to kiss you. But forgive me, this is not okay." Meng: "Of course! He walked in dignifiedly and said: Hey, this is not allowed!" Zhang: "It can be like this between us, but it won't work if it is another woman. After an episode, we are friends again. If people want to say yes Crazy. And the trouble is, it’s not only my friends who are jealous, but any woman, a man who mentions it a little bit, says hello, always feels a little sad, and can’t lose his temper every time. And he loses his temper every time. I don’t tell you anything, I just say irrelevant things, and I’m wary, so there’s nothing to talk about. I think it’s better to bear it. The more you indulge your temper, the more tempered you become. Just bear it.” Tapir Tapir Meng: "But it's so annoying, I often have to be suspicious - of course you think that everyone likes him, because he is the best - otherwise you wouldn't marry him. Life is really a terrible thing!"

Zhang: "About polygamy—" Tapir: "In theory, I agree, but it cannot be implemented." Zhang: "Me too, if it is like in Chinese Tanci novels, two women are sisters or sworn brothers Where's the sister?" Tapir Dream: "Only worse." Zhang: "Yes. But if you look down on another woman, that is also unacceptable to our self-esteem. As a result, you may have to work hard to find some good things in her, so that you yourself like her. Yes. That kind of psychology. Of course, after you like it, you will only be more hostile." Tapir Dream: "Fortunately, it's not our turn yet. Europe is about to practice polygamy, and too many men die-see what good they can do Think of a way." Zhang: (Suddenly, worriedly) "Dream, what kind of clothes are you going to wear when you get old?" Dream: "Indian veil—I think it's Most merciful. Whether I marry an Indian or a Chinese in the future, I will wear an Indian veil—the majesty of a stone statue. It doesn’t matter if you are fat or thin. Or, maybe, the old Chinese jacket and trousers..."

Zhang: (happy) "Oh, by the way, I can also wear long jackets and trousers, which cover everything, but still look good; blue, black, and yellow, and there are many old-fashioned colors Tapir Dream: "Oh, now you can rest assured! You don't have any fear of old age, do you? I have never seen such a person as Zhang Ai! Even when she gets old, I have to decide in advance what clothes she should wear! Yes It's not that I should have clearly stated in the will: Zhang Ai can wear whatever she wants after a few years..." Zhang: (laughing) "No - you know I hate this class of old ladies the most, how they dress so darkly. They are shrunken. If they have a little personality, they are church-like. Foreign old ladies are enlightened, with red flowers. You can wear it, and on the big back, there are dense small white flowers, which make people dizzy. The blue background is calico, and the red background is calico, wrapped with inhuman flesh, so ugly!" Tapir dream: "Oh, You remember last time when I was discussing Eastern and Western cultures with a friend, it suddenly occurred to me that I wanted to tell him: Western fashions also negate one generation after another, so there are many ideas for refurbishment; while Indian veils are permanent , slowly add a little bit in, add a little bit in, and finally it becomes a stereotype, with a universal and inclusive beauty, and it is impossible to change a little detail. And about Japanese culture-my obsession with Japanese culture has passed."

Zhang: "Ah, me too! Three years ago, when I saw their woodblock prints for the first time, their clothing, porcelain, those innocent, red-faced soldiers, and the ship we came back to Shanghai, the old Japanese sailor took out He showed us the photos of his three daughters; passing by Taiwan, Taiwan’s beautiful mountains, floating on the sea, like those in Chinese green landscape paintings, such mountains, unexpected, really exist! The scenery in Japan is said to be the same. The cabin Looking out of the window hole, the round window hole, at night, the bay is blue-gray, a small fishing boat is quiet, and a red lantern is lit... At that time, I really fell in love with it!" Tapir tapir dream : "Yes, they have an elegant charm, very cute." Zhang: "For me, it's not entirely because of their elegance. Because I am Chinese, I like the kindness and subtlety of ancient China. They have a A kind of subtle air." The tapir dreamed: "Well, good is that kind of air. For example, there is a layer of silvery white fog on the mountain. The fog is beautiful, but there is still a mountain behind the fog. The mountain is real. Their Fog, no mountains behind."

Zhang: "Yes, many of their feelings are superficial. For things they are not familiar with, they have no feelings; for things they are familiar with, they have a prescribed feeling for everything - what should they think." : "Looking at their paintings, I always feel that there are more and more meanings in the roundness and beauty, which makes people wait humbly. But now I know that everything I see at a glance is there. " Zhang: "..." Tapir Dream: "..." Zhang: "..." Tapir Dream: "Do you think we criticize too harshly? We are always greedy for more, and we are always dissatisfied."

Zhang: "I don't think it's too harsh. However, compared with Western and Chinese modern civilizations, I still prefer Japanese civilization." Tapir Dream: "Me too." Zhang: "The current China and India are really not good. As for foreign countries, we all grew up in the British and American ideological atmosphere, and we have many opportunities to see their flaws. Even Huxley, who I like , and now I gradually dislike it." Tapir Dream: "Yes, he is not as great as we thought." Zhang: "At first glance, it looks so deep and narrow, but it's actually relatively simple-minded." Tapir Dream: "I'm a little suspicious even of Egyptian art, such a lofty silence. Added it." Zhang: "Ah, but isn't all art like this? It's a bit unfair." Tapir Dream: (laughs) "I'm afraid too, it's so irregular, I like it Throw it away again, and shatter the illusion as soon as it comes."

Zhang: "I think it should be like this, so that there is a comparison and improvement. Some people even stop at Wilde—really!" Tapir Dream: "The beauty of Wilde is really preliminary.——So I am afraid, Now that I’m talking to you, at least I know you understand; when I talk to others, they just nod their heads, how do I know if they really understand? Everyone in my family will think I’m crazy! So, don’t go away!” Zhang: "Okay, let's not go. I will probably always be in Shanghai." Tapir Dream: "There is a kind of completeness in the Japanese personality—a kind of completeness that is almost discouraging. A Japanese woman married to a foreigner, after For most of her life in the West, she seemed to have been absolutely assimilated, but after her husband died, she took the children and had to go back to Japan, and immediately became the most thorough Japanese, bowing, smiling, and saying a string of polite words, Patriotic love is very enthusiastic, and at the same time, there is that deep and shallow desolation..." Zhang: "Hey, I don't know why, if the Japanese are really cut off from their hometown, it's impossible. Like the Japanese in the United States, those who grew up in the United States are very light and beautiful, and they are completely Japanese; among them There are very few good ones, I don’t like them. Unlike Chinese, Chinese who can have Europeanization are still Chinese after all, and there are good and bad. Japanese can’t be half and half.” Tapir: “Do you remember you He told me that an ethnographer found out that the thinking of the Caucasians is a straight line, while the thinking of the Chinese is a small zigzag straight line; the Caucasians are strictly logical, while the logic of the Chinese often turns. activities; the Japanese way of thinking is even more strange, it is two parallel dotted lines, a small stroke on the left, a small stroke on the right, and then a small stroke on the left, a small stroke on the right, and so on.——This Isn’t it just like a person’s footprints? There is a gap between the footprints, even if one foot is high, one foot is low, and one step is empty, it is not a big problem; it is not like a straight line, which is suddenly interrupted , but it is not easy to connect." Zhang: "Ah, that's great. Two parallel dotted lines are compared to footprints. Just thinking of a person's footprints, there is a kind of integrity in it." When I walked out of the coffee shop, it was already dark. There was a small winter crescent moon and many stars in the sky, and the ground and body were transparent and cold as if they were naked and filled with water.One of their homes is in the east, and the other is in the west, the same distance; but Tapirom insisted on being taken there, and although Zhang Ailing complained, she still walked there with her. Zhang: (shaking) "It's really cold! No, I must catch a cold!" Tapir Dream: "No. What a lovely, exhilarating weather!" Zhang: "Of course you won't catch a cold. If it’s colder, you don’t have to wear socks, eat ice cream, and sweat. I’m going back! The more I walk, the farther I’ll go back. No, I’m really going to be sick!” Tapir Dream: “Ah, don’t go back, Send me to the end, and don't get sick!" Zhang: "You can't imagine the suffering of being sick. Now you see that I am talking and laughing, and I am somewhat thoughtful. When I go back, I have a fever and vomit, but I am alone. My aunt It is often said that I am selfish: Only the tapir dream is more selfish than you!" Tapir: "Ah, do you really think so? Hey, I have a very good sentence to criticize Professor Abe's short story "Friday Flowers". I was really disappointed when I saw that one.” Zhang: "Me too. It seems to be subtle, but only light." Tapir: "Yes, it's just a little meaning, and it can't bear such a capitalization. The whole thing is stretched too long and spread too thin Yes. But I said it was beautiful, and I said it was a pencil drawing, but two strokes of ink were added to it, leaving traces. I just wrote it in the composition and handed it in. Do you think he will be angry? "Zhang:" No way?But no, I really want to go back, it's too cold! "Tapir:" Ah, isn't it good to walk and talk like this? " Zhang: "Yes, but I was the only one on the way back. You know sometimes I can't stand the loneliness for a moment. There are many people on the tram, which is very lively, but it can't be crowded. Otherwise, I will go back by tricycle. It would be good to shorten the time, but I don’t want to spend that money, it’s too wronged! Why should I send you home and call a tricycle to go back? It’s not your boyfriend!——Unless you pay half of the money for me.” Tapir tapir dream: "Okay, okay, don't babble, you call the tricycle back, I will pay half." Zhang: "Okay, then." Zhang Ailing didn't have a hundred-yuan bill, so she borrowed two hundred yuan from Kameng, and used one hundred and seventy yuan for the bus ride. On the way in the car, she calculated that Kameng should pay her eighty-five yuan. Next time, I will remember to pay her back one hundred and fifteen. Yuan.Their money has always been repaid, and they rarely settle their accounts.