Chapter 23 life without fail

Recently, I read an article "Love, After Divorce" by a female writer named Joan Mills, and I read it twice in one sitting.I admire this female writer for her confidence in love.The pursuit of understanding can be so appropriate.That calmly dealt with the changes in my life after the end of my marriage.After all, divorce is a bad thing, and the pain of divorce is the most profound.But Joan Mills is one of those rare good things that breeds a nobler love and renewed hope in a family after divorce. This is difficult for most people, especially women.In the face of family disintegration.After the blow of disillusionment, although both men and women are equally frustrated by the failure, the pain is unspeakable, and they will be sluggish and disheartened.In any case, for anyone, family is important, like a pillar in the soul, once broken, life will be shaky as if there is no center of gravity, especially for the female side, it is even more difficult to get back together, because, the knot A married woman tends to put her body and mind away.Life and even life are completely entrusted to the family, entrusted to the family, relying on each other, like milk and milk, it is difficult for them to have a clear and independent self.It is conceivable that facing the breakdown of their families, their despair seems to be facing a catastrophe.So, in the dispute house.property.When they were children, what they were most unwilling to give up was their children. In the days to come, they could only cling closer to their children.Relying on children, life has some comfort.However, after twenty-two years of peaceful life with her husband and children, the female writer named Joan Mills realized more and more clearly that a dilemma forced her to make a choice: one On the one hand, she loves her family; on the other hand, she feels that she is fading day by day in the family.For this reason, she decided to leave her family and children to find a way of life to express herself—she rented a small room in a nearby village, so that she could write quietly and take care of her responsibilities as a mother.At first, the children didn't understand her choice.After she left, she also missed her children from time to time. She wrote: "For many years, I have been preparing to adapt to this huge transition. Children also need time to grieve like us. Anger and acceptance. Love The faith that made me wait for them to understand." She waited.First of all, she waited for a self who can live according to her own wishes, and at the same time, she waited for the understanding of the children: "You and Dad have really different pursuits in life, we really don't understand, how can you make do together So long..." Of course, the children's understanding was based on the amicable divorce between Joan Mills and her husband.Disengaged from the relationship, they can comfortably go their own way, maintain their own lifestyles and pursuits in life, and still try their best to take on the responsibilities of being parents.Treating divorce in such a reasonable and reasonable way makes the "broken" life heal in a new sense with a new form and content.Joan Mills did not truly feel that she had become a new woman until she was fifty.

I think Joan Mills' story is a good lesson: don't be pessimistic about life's failures.It can be said that divorce is not a failure, and life is not a failure. The key lies in how you view life and how you treat life.It's not realistic to do everything the same, and it's unrealistic to demand success, and the same is true for marriage.The problem is that you must not make the tragedy of divorce worse, or make yourself go from one tragedy to another.In life, women are more likely than men to play tragic roles, and they often play tragic roles without realizing it.We might as well learn from Joan Mills' sobriety and awareness, as well as her bravery and open-mindedness, so that no matter what life changes we encounter, we can maintain ourselves and maintain a good feeling.