Chapter 29 Finish your studies and try to return home

The spirit is depressing and the situation is grim; but my studies are still going on as usual. In the three departments I selected, the studies were all smooth.The main courses are Sanskrit and Pali. In the first semester, Professor Waldschmidt taught Sanskrit grammar. In the second semester, he read the original Sanskrit "Nara Biography", and then read Kalidasa's "Cloud Messenger" and so on.From the fifth semester onwards, you will enter the real Seminar (discussion class), and read the Sanskrit Buddhist scriptures unearthed in Turpan, Xinjiang, China. This is Professor Waldschmidt’s forte, and his teacher H. ) and himself are authorities on this subject.At the beginning of the sixth semester, he discussed with me the topic of his doctoral dissertation, and finally decided to study the verb conjugations in the gatha part of Mahvastu.Since then, I have used all available time to study the three thick volumes of "Big Events" in addition to teaching classes.Shortly after the outbreak of World War II, my professor was drafted into the army.Professor Sick, who has retired, came out to take his place in class in his twilight years.Professor Sick is really tireless in teaching. He solemnly announced to me in the first class that he would impart to me all the knowledge he has specialized in in his life without reservation, one is "Rig Veda" and the other is Indian classical grammar "Dashu", one is "Biography of Ten Princes", and the last is Tocharian. He is a world master who has mastered Tocharian.In this way, when Professor Waldschmidt was in the army, I wrote my thesis while taking classes with Professor Sigg.Learning is smooth.

One sub-department is British Linguistics, and the other is Slavic Linguistics. I also took classes as usual, and these classes also went smoothly. As far as the doctoral dissertation is concerned, it is a crucial work for the degree examination.Professors judge students' abilities mainly through papers.German universities have very strict requirements for papers, and the topics are generally not big, but you must have something new to pass.Some Chinese students have stayed in Germany for six or seven years, but they still can't get a degree. The key lies in the dissertation.Zhang Yong is an example. An international student surnamed Ye also met the same fate.After the topic of my thesis was decided, I actively wrote it, and by 1940, it was basically finished.Sick also mentored me during Waldschmidt's time in the army.Waldschmidt went home for vacation, so I showed him the paper.I don't know how to type, but I was helped by the eldest daughter of the Meyer family, Irmgard, a very beautiful girl.In the autumn of this year, I went to her house every night.Because the Sanskrit alphabet is transliterated from Latin, there are many symbols, and I have to sit next to me to avoid mistakes. On September 13, the thesis was finished.Waldschmidt's prior consent had been obtained. On October 9, submit the thesis to Professor Deiehgrber, Dean of Letters.According to German rules, the dean arranges the date of the oral examination, and the dean is the youngest full professor.Daisy Graebel is a professor of Greek and Latin, and has just been promoted to full professor.According to the rules, the three departments should have an oral exam at the same time.However, Waldschmidt was returning home on vacation and could not wait long. English professor Roeder was hospitalized with illness. During the oral examination on December 23, 1940, he only had Sanskrit and Slavic linguistics, and English would be added later.My diary for the day reads:

Waking up at 5am.I just thought about the oral exam, and I couldn't sleep anymore. I woke up at 7 o'clock, had breakfast, and read a book randomly for a while, feeling extremely panicked. Go to the university office at 9:30.Walk on the road like a prisoner in prison. The oral exam starts at 10 o'clock. Prof． Waldschmidt (Professor Waldschmidt) asked first, only Prof. Deichgrber (Professor Daixi Greber) sat next to him. Prof． Braun (Professor Braun) went later.The main course went very smoothly.But when Prof. When Braun started asking, he left me unprepared.I panicked.His question was so simple it was almost common sense.But I can't think yet, and I seem to be in a panic.

At 12 o'clock, I felt extremely sad.At this time, passing or failing is not a problem. I have been taking exams all my life, but I never thought that I would be so flustered during this last exam.Diary for the second day: The mood is extremely chaotic.His thesis is not only Prof. Sieg, Prof. Waldschmidt thought it was excellent, even Prof. Krause also thought it was rare, and thought he could do a good test; but yesterday's Russian oral test was really bad.He didn't ask me what I knew, and what I asked was not what I had prepared.Thinking about it now, I still feel extremely sad.

This can be said to be the aftermath of yesterday's emotions.But that night: Arrive at Prof. before 7 o'clock. I went to Waldschmidt's house, and he invited me for the holidays (Xianlin's note: referring to Christmas).It's snowing, but not cold.Walking on the road, I just thought about the results of yesterday's exam, and I must ask him.As soon as he entered the door, he congratulated me and said that my thesis was sehrgut (excellent), Indology (Ihdologie) sehrgut, and Slavic languages ​​were also sehrgut.This is really beyond my expectation, and I have a deep feeling for Prof. Braun happened to be infinitely grateful.

His son plays the violin first, then eats.After eating, light all the candles on the Christmas tree, drink, eat snacks, and talk nonsense. I went home at 10:30, still thinking about the exam. On February 19, 1941 in the second year, Professor Röder recovered and was discharged from the hospital to make up for the oral English test. Professor Waldschmidt also took part, and I got another sehrgut.Even the thesis plus the oral exam, a total of four sehrguts were obtained.I didn't embarrass the Chinese, so I can comfort my dear motherland and my mother's spirit in heaven.This is the end of the doctoral examination scene.

As for my doctoral dissertation, it caused a bit of a stir at the time.The sensation mainly comes from Prof. Krause (Professor Krause).He is a world-renowned comparative linguist and an extraordinary figure. He was blind since he was a child, but he has an amazing memory, which is as accurate as a camera.He can master dozens of ancient and modern languages, and he can speak several Nordic languages.Before class, he only needs someone to read the lecture notes to him once, and he can speak almost verbatim for two hours.He also learned Tocharian from Professor Sieg, and his big book ("Grammar of Western Tocharian") is recognized as being able to compare with Sieg, Siegling, and Schulze. Firero grammar is comparable.He gave a very high evaluation to the appendix of my doctoral thesis about the ending-mathe, because it is said that there are similar endings in ancient Greek, and this coincidence is a breakthrough for the study of comparative linguistics of the Indo-European language family. significance. In my diary on January 14, 1941, there is the following passage:

Hartmann went.He first congratulated me on my exam, and then said: Prof. Krause was full of praise for my paper, and the Endungmatha (verb suffix matha) can be said to be an important discovery.He immediately copied it out, and maybe he could get some interesting inventions from it.Miss Boehncke has told me these words.Although I don't think my thesis is bad, I don't think there is anything serious about it.In this way, I also became a little bit flustered. So much for oral exams and papers.Because this is a relatively important issue during my ten years in Germany, I wrote a lot.

Why do I have to get a doctorate? Some of the reasons are the same as the average person, and some of them may be very different.Many scholars in modern China, such as Wang Guowei, Liang Qichao, Chen Yinke, Guo Moruo, Lu Xun, etc., do not have any doctorate titles, but they all have status in academic history.I know this.But these people are extraordinary geniuses, and the title of doctor is useless to them.But I ask myself, I am not this kind of person, I never overestimate myself, I am willing to be an ordinary person, and an ordinary person, if he does not have a glittering doctorate title, he will inevitably lose his job in the struggle for a job. is a loser.This can be said to be one of the motivations, but there are two.When I was in China, I didn’t like some high-spirited international students. I thought they had only stewed beef in foreign countries for a few years.But if I am not also an overseas student, if I express my dissatisfaction, some people will regard me as a fox who can't eat grapes and says grapes are sour.In order not to be a fox, I must go abroad and obtain a doctorate.This motive sounds ridiculous, but it is true.For many years, the title of doctor is like a phantom, flying in front of my eyes, near or far, hidden or visible.Sometimes it is so close that it seems that you can grab it as soon as you reach out.Sometimes it is far away in the sky, out of reach.Sometimes it's bright and sometimes it's dark.This makes me sometimes excited and dripping, and sometimes dejected.Such is the mood of an ordinary person.

Now the long-cherished wish of many years has finally come true, and I immediately think of my country and family again.The beauty of mountains and rivers is not my land, and wandering in the world will never return.In 1942, when the German government recognized the government of the traitor Wang Ji in Nanjing, the legation of the Kuomintang government was forced to withdraw to Switzerland.After careful consideration, I decided to leave Germany, go to Switzerland first, and try to return home from there.My junior high school classmate Zhang Tianlin lived in Berlin at the time, and I wanted to visit him to see if there was anything I could do.Once I made up my mind, I went to the home of a teacher and friend I knew to bid farewell.Of course everyone felt very sorry, and my heart was also full of parting feelings.The hardest hurdle was with my landlady.At this time, the male landlord had passed away, and the son was married and living in another city.I am the only relative around her, and she treats me like a son.Recalling the night when her husband died, I was the one who ran to the street to knock on the door to find a doctor, and stayed with her after returning home.Now once I leave, she will be left alone in the five houses, deserted and miserable, how can she bear it! When she heard the news that I was leaving, she immediately burst into tears.When I thought of being together for seven years, we have been in the same boat through thick and thin, once we say goodbye, when will we see you again? Tears welled up in my eyes.

After arriving in Berlin, I realized that going to Switzerland is not so easy.Even if they get there, it is difficult to return home immediately.It seems that it can only stay in Germany.At this point the war had lasted for three years.Although there have been some small bombings, the truly large-scale and violent bombings have not yet begun.In Berlin, aside from food shortages, life seemed peaceful.The street was still full of traffic and pedestrians, and there was no panic on their faces.I found time to visit the great educational psychologist E. Spranger.He also went to the Prussian Academy of Sciences to visit Professor Sickling, and he and Professor Sick had read through Tocharian.I've been reading his books for years, but never met him.He looked very simple and honest, dull and taciturn.Still studying hard at his desk amidst the sound of war, he is a typical German scholar.In this way, I stayed in Berlin for a few days and returned to Göttingen on October 30, 1942. As soon as I got home, the landlady seemed to have picked a golden phoenix out of thin air, and was overjoyed.I also feel like a wanderer returning home.Since there was no hope of returning home, I had no choice but to live with the situation, throw away all unrealistic fantasies, and live and die with Germany, and share weal and woe with my landlady. I went back to the rigid monotony of seven years.After eating breakfast at home every day, I went to the Sanskrit Research Institute in the Gauss-Weber Building, where I worked until noon.Lunch is eaten in a restaurant outside as usual.Still go back to the Institute after eating.I am no longer a student, I have completed the withdrawal procedures and am now a full-time teacher.I no longer need to run around to attend classes, but sometimes I go to the Institute of Sinology to teach German students.The main energy is spent on reading and writing by myself.I continued to study Buddhism mixed with Sanskrit, following the path blazed by my doctoral dissertation.Except for hunger and occasional air raids, life was very regular and peaceful.Opposite the research institute is the university library. There are almost all the reference books that I need, sometimes even extremely strange, here. It is really an ideal environment for studying and writing.Therefore, my writing results are extremely impressive.During the five years after my post-doctorate, I wrote several fairly long papers, which were published in the journal of the Academy of Sciences in Göttingen, claiming that each paper contained new ideas; until today, nearly half a century has passed, and I have continued to It was quoted.This was the golden period of my lifelong academic life, and it has not been since. Although the day passed smoothly, calmly.But it cannot be said that there are no twists and turns.The German fascist government recognized the puppet government of Wang, which affected the residence issue of our Chinese students: Where can we apply for an extension when the passport expires? Which country’s embassy issued this passport? This is a matter of great importance and Problems to be solved.I had a serious discussion with Zhang Wei and other Chinese students who were still in Göttingen, and decided to go to the police station and declare myself stateless.This is permissible under international law.The so-called "stateless" means that they have no obligations to any country, but at the same time they are not protected by any country.There is a little risk in it, but things have come to this point, so we have to take this step.Henceforth we have become like birds in the air, seemingly free and at ease, yet anyone can hurt it. In fact, no one hurt us.Under the combined pressure of bombing and starvation, my life was relatively peaceful.Every day I walk mechanically through those streets that I have been walking for seven years. I am familiar with every house and every tree.Even with my eyes closed, I will never go astray.However, as soon as Sunday came, my sad day came.I'm still used to going to Schiller Lawn early in the morning, and my feet turn in that direction involuntarily.The scenery of Schiller Lawn remains the same, its appearance has not changed, it is still surrounded by green trees and green grass.However, at this time, I was alone. The few Chinese friends who had to meet every week in those days were all separated from each other, and the world was divided into two. I feel desolate and alone.