Chapter 113 mountain stream autumn leaves

1 The leaves of enlightened thoughts are falling from the tree of reading the world, and the leaves are shining with golden luster. But how long will the autumn leaves of the night enlightenment be able to spin and drift in the stream of fate winding through the valley of the world? 2 In the depths of human nature, the most unbearable thing is the success suddenly revealed by the humble acquaintances in the past. When the news about the success and fame of the person I knew in the past suddenly appeared on the media, I couldn’t help but murmur to the people around me—— "In our class, he failed the most times!"

"He, he was the most popular in our unit back then!" "I have returned at least a dozen manuscripts from him...it's really useless! Just his current one...he has to return it to me!" "You know? She didn't take any exams at that time!" "Look, look, his eyes are typical triangular eyes!" "...Don't mention it, back then...if it wasn't for me..." Perhaps, when things come to an end, "short combat" will congratulate him or her in person, but seeing his or her success attitude, there will always be "a villain succeeds", "a monkey wins the crown", "how long will it be?" "Such a feeling of disgust and contempt.

This "unbearable lightness of being" is often the most unbearable among people of the same sex, generation, and especially among "same family". If it's just as mentioned above, at some "occasions", I can't help expressing some disdain and ridicule, and even "casually" when sitting around relatives, friends and colleagues, or at social dinners. To tell a story or two about how wretched and embarrassing "that master" was back then, to be honest, they all belong to the category of "human nature", and they are not considered as serious evils in human nature.

If sometimes, when encountering a certain opportunity, I actually face the "smug" person, or squeeze it out from between the teeth, or pack it with a smile, and "dedicate" to disappoint him, especially to expose the "old bottom" or "scar". As long as there is no trouble, it is nothing more than a sour "spiritual collision" between people. If one can only keep contempt and disdain in one's heart, and not show it in color, then one's virtue should be said to be quite high. Sartre said, "Others are hell." Too serious! But in the eyes of others, the successful ones, especially those who appear as "flooded lotus", will indeed not be paradise.Behind the "starchasers" of fans, there will be many pairs of more than critical eyes staring at and scanning like searchlights.

Think about it carefully, the "jealousy", "dissatisfaction", "disagreement", "see how long you will be popular" in the sea of ​​human nature...the never-ending waves may be an indispensable balancer for human groups. After all, the world does not exist only for outstanding "successful people". When "successful people" taste the "fruits of success", they must pay a price, and the price must include others--the main thing is not necessarily the same. Members of the "successful group", but those who have not necessarily achieved the same success, or have not even talked about success - ridicule and disdain, or in the vernacular, "reform".

Successful people who are aware of someone's "wrong change" and don't take it as a blame may use that "wrong change" as a whetstone to sharpen their mind to become stronger and sharper. In this way, the human instincts of "bad reform" and "out of water hibiscus" should be classified into the category of human goodness. 3 I said to myself many times: we must pursue beauty, but we must not pursue perfection. The reason is actually very simple, because one's own existence, if explored from the root, is already imperfect.For example, if the eyes are too small, even if you go for cosmetic surgery to cut the double eyelids, you may still not be able to "everyone sees them as beautiful".

What's more, on the road of life in the past, I left behind, not to mention many, but also a considerable number, some of which can be said to be shocking mistakes.Although generally speaking, it has come to an end from the external aspect, and the lessons have been condensed from the inner aspect, but everything cannot be erased and restarted. My life course is not perfect, what should I do?Because you can no longer be perfect, do you just sink into it, or simply destroy yourself? If you think about it in detail, your character is not perfect.If as a social person, the required morality can be cultivated to perfection, but there are still non-social factors in one's own life, such as personality, which is one of them, and it is difficult to change the personality, especially the most important part of the personality. The core things may be determined by the chromosomes and cannot be changed at all. If they are changed, there will be no "self".If you realize that you have obvious weaknesses in your character, and you fall into anxiety, then, "To live or die?" You can't be a Hamlet at all. Apart from dying in tragedy, where is the other way out?

One must approach and enter beauty as much as possible.Chekhov used the mouth of a character in the play "Uncle Vanya" to declare: "Everything about a person should be beautiful: face, clothes, heart, thoughts." But that character, I remember, was a country doctor, and he had great taste. , Not vulgar, but also has obvious shortcomings. I am afraid that what he said is mainly to encourage himself and others to yearn for beauty and integrate beauty as much as possible, rather than expressing a "declaration of perfectionism". You can declare the necessity of beauty, but don't issue a "declaration of perfectionism". This is a very simple idea of ​​mine.

If you want to be perfect or not just for yourself, and worry there, that's fine.If the idea of ​​perfection is imposed on others, it will be troublesome, and even a very terrible idea will be derived. In particular, first set yourself up to be perfect, and then judge others by yourself, only to find that the life around you exists, it is too tolerant to describe it as "all beings", and it must be called "smelly fish and rotten shrimp", or even regarded as "fly-like". ", that thought was really chilling. Just staying in the train of thought, or compiling the train of thought into a "beautiful article", may still be regarded as a kind of "extraordinary splendor" in the multicultural pattern; "Smelly fish, rotten shrimp" and "flies", I am afraid that they can only be sent to the gas chamber to be "actually resolved" like the Jews who were judged as "inferior races" in the Auschwitz concentration camp back then!

It's easy to set yourself as perfect, but others don't necessarily recognize you as perfect.It is easy to admit it, reward and encourage it, comfort and forgive it, keep it calm, or sniff at it: "Who wants you to make fun of it!" If you don't admit it, it will be difficult. Especially some people who not only do not admit it, but also openly point out their shortcomings, in order to maintain their perfect dignity, they must be suppressed and wiped out!However, in today's world, it is unprecedentedly difficult to subdue and eliminate imperfect aliens. Setting yourself up for perfection will also trap your mind into extreme paranoia.For example, I hurt some people in previous political campaigns. The reason is not difficult to analyze. There are special external influences at that time, and I have my own misunderstanding at that time. , It turned out to be not very serious, and it is not difficult to draw a full stop.However, in order to insist on my perfect, that is, the belief that is always correct, even though most people have now formed a consensus that "it is wrong to do that", I still insist on "no mistake". It's not just a "personal reservation", that's all. If you have some power and use it to create a situation that exceeds your "personal reservation" and continues to hurt innocent people, such a "pursuit of perfection" is far from the United States. , away from the good, away from the truth, it is nothing more than running in the opposite direction, and it is far away from thousands of miles away!

Perfection is a kind of utopia. Utopia, as a longing, can inspire us to approach beauty.Thinking about utopia, writing about utopia, and singing about utopia are all necessary elements in the spiritual life of human beings.The longing for Utopia is the source of inspiration for many Chinese and foreign ancient and modern literary and artistic works. However, if utopia is put into practical operation, and it is an operation eager for success, it will lead to disaster and even catastrophe. The misery of mankind may be condensed here. Individual life should have a corresponding awareness of this. 4 As the saying goes: "A man who is 55 is better than a tiger who goes downhill." By the end of the century, I am already 58 years old, am I still angry?Don't dare to boast like that.But on the tree of life, the annual rings are indeed thickened, and the autumn is strong, and the leaves of awakening are beginning to fall.The leaves with rusty spots drift meanderingly along the stream of fate.These leaves are not perfect, and they will eventually rot, but will friends in the valley of the world accidentally see and pick them up?I only hope that after inspection, I can smile a little, or be stunned for a moment, and then throw it away. The autumn leaves of my life, you fall silently... and the stream of fate, there is no end in sight for a while. Autumn leaves of mountains and streams, you are getting farther and farther away, but you still seem to be swaying on the tree of my life...