Chapter 5 I beat you with a steel whip

Recently, I was pulled by Phoenix Satellite TV's "Qiang Qiang Threesome" column, and did several episodes of the program, so I received a new round of praise and criticism.Most of the people who praised me were middle-aged and elderly comrades, such as teachers and colleagues from Peking University and Tsinghua University. They mainly praised me for satirizing and criticizing certain social phenomena in a humorous style.Those who criticized me were some young students who liked me, such as Xiao Wu from Harbin and De Qiang from Chengdu, mainly because they were worried that I would speak casually and fall into the ranks of kitsch.I thanked them and thought about it for myself. Here is a little bit about why I agreed to go there.

I am now more and more inclined to decline invitations from TV stations. One is that my time is tight, and no matter how scientifically arranged it is not enough; the other is that the content of most TV programs is false and boring. The audience; third, the format of the program is authoritarian, using guests as props, and there is no minimum freedom of speech.In fact, Phoenix TV also has many problems, but relatively speaking, "Qiang Qiang Threesome" can be said to be the most authentic Chinese TV show. In fact, the most free TV program. For a 21-minute program, basically 21 minutes will be talked about on the spot, without deletion or modification, without labeling or hitting, as long as the constitution allows it, and there is no serious harm to the old, young, sick, disabled and pregnant.

It can be said.Although Teacher Dou Wentao likes to talk about "yellow mouth", it may be because his physical development is relatively late, and he is still in the stage of oral pleasure for such a big "mature man", but Fenghuangtai and Zhong The leaders of the Propaganda Department did not deal with him, and did not label him a "counter-revolutionary oral adulterer", which is called "appointing people on their merits."At that time, Lin Biao had a few fierce generals under his command, and they fought beautifully, but life was more difficult. Hua, it seems to be Huang Yongsheng, Li Zuopeng and others, every time they win a battle, they will go to corruption for a few days.Lin Biao was extremely strict in governing the army, but he still refused to let them go.Dou Wentao has a lot of ghost ideas, and it is not

Often dedicated to his work, he reads a lot of information every day to make a show, and even steals public newspapers on the plane, which is ridiculed by the flight attendant.Every time a guest arrives, he starts nagging, especially when a beautiful guest Just asking Mr. Kong about the charming moment when the thrushes are deep and shallow, this Dou Wentao must have frowned and rushed in and said: "Mr. Kong, I think we should start with this sentence." Teacher Kong hates it the most. When preparing for the show, I just perfunctory him and said, okay, okay, you can start casually, and I will guarantee you a safe connection.It is said that Kong Qingdong is a famous rescue master in China, no matter the host gets stuck or the audience stutters

, or the other guests are instant idiots, as long as Kong Qingdong is present, this show will be the Great Wall of the Sky that will not be broken or broken.Many people watch the edited program, thinking that Mr. Kong likes to grab the talk , In fact, it was the opposite at the scene. Teacher Kong never let others talk, and only when the blasting platoon fell down, he jumped bravely and blocked the hole of the gun.Of course, there are times when individual bullets cannot knock down the pursuers. , I had no choice but to jump down the cliff, "I know you will catch me with your flowery lips and arms".

"Qiang Qiang Threesome" has another advantage, that is, the degree of political openness is relatively large.Don't wantonly hate and belittle socialism just because it is a capitalist TV station, and don't want to belittle socialism just because the mainland advertises socialism. Socialism hates and belittles capitalism.Discuss the matter as it stands, and show off your temperament.There is no "set tone" or outline for each program.Respect the audience, respect the guests.Because this is not a classroom, do not Lectures do not need to be systematic, rigorous, and watertight.Everyone is full of real sense of responsibility for their work because they are unrestrained, and they have achieved what Lao Mao said "unity, tension, seriousness and liveliness".by the way

, Some friends who love Mao Zedong criticized me for not being called "Old Mao", saying that this is not serious.I think Mao is a common man, both great and common. I respect him and sympathize with him.Zen Buddhism says that you can "heal the Buddha and scold the ancestors", that is true respect.What's more, Mao Zedong is still far from reaching the realm of Buddha.Some friends, especially Christian friends, did not understand the "reactionary mouth" at the end of my article before. No.", thinking that I was insulting God, but you can understand it after reading Zen Buddhism.

Now the talk shows of most TV stations cater to the leaders’ intentions and make money.It is necessary to deceive the people and pretend to be democratic and free, so it often has a short life.Record the atmosphere of the scene Nervous and embarrassing, someone specially organized the audience to applaud and even pretend to be the audience to ask questions.If the performance of the audience is not up to standard, it will not be over. Those audiences who have finally entered the TV station have to swallow their breath.right Guests are also very disrespectful.The editor and director have stipulated in advance what the guests will say and how to say.Once a certain choreographer pleaded with me and said, "Mr. Kong, just be the opposite!" I said I'm sorry, no one can

In order to stipulate what Kong Qingdong said, the leaders of Peking University didn't care about me, so I ran here to find an uncle instead?Some directors force guests to attack someone personally, or even use insulting or teasing words. Speech to stimulate guests to achieve "passion" effect.I would like to ask these TV programs, are you socialist, capitalist or feudal?Is it the leadership, the wealthy or the public? ?In fact, it is not, everything is fake, it is not a donkey, not a horse, it is an autocracy pretending to be a democracy, it is a vulgarity pretending to be a personality, it is a muddy pond pretending to be innocent.TV should pay attention to efficiency, not

Avoidance requires a certain degree of "performance", but this performance must be genuine, and performance is not equal to fake. "Qiang Qiang Threesome" may be a little loose, but the good thing is that there is no need to cooperate Central policies and local regulations, don't worry about the mood of the big money, the face of the traitor, say what you want, and say what you say, it is both solemn and harmonious, and it does its own way.So, as soon as they came to me, I went.about Brother A Yi has a more exciting article on the many disadvantages of Chinese TV, you can refer to it.

And from the title of "Qing Qiang Threesome", I can't help but think of the "Dragon Tiger Fight" that Ah Q's predecessors like to sing: "Qing Ling Qiang, I will beat you with a steel whip..." We hold the remote control every day, The 70 or 80 channels of the great motherland are changed like a revolving lantern, and they are all the same, disappointed, nothing to watch, and nothing to watch.Stiff news, disgusting jokes, mentally retarded singing and dancing, fake interviews, you say, shouldn't this be called? Fortunately, there are also weather forecasts, forums of hundreds of schools, the golden years, Quyuan Zatan, discovery and exploration... and, Qiangqiang threesome.I boasted again.I have an old classmate from Harbin No. 3 Middle School named Hong Zhou, who works in the Ministry of Public Security and often hits my self-esteem. He said: Lao Kong can be popular on TV, which shows how bad Chinese TV is.I totally agree with his conclusion, when laymen like A Yi Kong Qingdong are not even allowed to enter the TV station, then Chinese TV may reach the undergraduate level.