Chapter 21 Further Discussion on Murong Fu's Lessons

As mentioned earlier, Murong Fu stepped into the arena with an attitude of "singing his voice, asking for his friend's voice", and he deliberately courted people in the arena everywhere.However, what is interesting is that he was "looking for friends" everywhere, but he didn't make a good friend from the beginning to the end.Even his father, who is also lonely and arrogant, has Jiumozhi as a good friend, but Murong Fu has no good friends. where is the problem?Why did he repeatedly miss people like Duan Zhengchun, Xiao Feng, Duan Yu and Xu Zhu who could have been good friends?I think his biggest problem is that when making friends, he "can only make friends, not make friends at the same level", and it is difficult to form friendships with high-level people.

After reading carefully, we will find that there are two kinds of personalities that Murong Fu pursues and emulates: one is the virtuous corporals like the princes of Mengchang and Pingyuan in the Warring States Period, who recruited heroes from all over the world; Shame on you. When walking in the rivers and lakes, whenever he meets heroes who are lower in status and weaker than himself, his first complex of the Warring States Prince will break out.This makes him often able to put on a posture of eagerness for talent and deliberate acceptance, and take the initiative to extend an olive branch.Even in the face of the scum and scum in the world, he can quite show a kind of mind that doesn't only care about his background, doesn't look into the past, and has no friends.

For example, he met the so-called "thirty-six cave masters and seventy-two island masters". These people are all middle- and lower-level people in the rivers and lakes.Murong Fu's subordinates clearly opposed making friends with these people.His number one general, Deng Baichuan, has rich experience in the world and is a mature and prudent person, so he firmly opposes associating with these people, "Seeing that these people are not good people, it will be harmful and not beneficial to associate with them." Instruct Murong Fu to withdraw quickly." Ordinarily, Deng Baichuan's views are reasonable, but Murong Fu not only insisted on making an alliance with these people, but also said some very warm words, such as "In my lifetime, we will always share weal and woe and help each other in adversity. That's it."Obviously, the friendship with others is not up to this level, but to say such intimate words, "It's like forming a life-and-death friendship."His attitude certainly exceeded the expectations of the island owners and cave owners, so "everyone cheered and applauded."

This kind of scene and state of making friends is Murong Fu's favorite and the most comfortable state - he is high above the stars, and the stars are holding the moon; Let's take a look at the whole book, almost all the scenes where Murong Fu can actively and happily make friends are similar.For example, at the later Shaolin Temple Conference, he stood up for the heroes almost exactly the same, and took the initiative to challenge Xiao Feng, the public enemy of the martial arts, saying that "I have done a little bit for the heroes of the Central Plains, even if I die, it is an honor."Just like what I said to those island owners and cave owners before, "we share good and bad, help each other in adversity", this is also an exaggerated statement for no reason, and the effect is almost the same, "the sound of applause resounds all over the field in an instant".

Many readers tend to think that Murong Fu is a narrow-minded person who cannot tolerate being offended, but in fact this is not entirely the case.In the face of people who are inferior to him in status and ability, he often appears to be quite tolerant, even if he is seriously offended or even raped by his cousin. For example, the thirty-six cave masters and the seventy-two island masters, offending him is no small feat, such as "there are no tigers in the mountains, monkeys are called kings", "wet brats", "funny, funny, shameless, shameless", He almost insulted Wang Yuyan, Murong Fu can ignore it.Does this count as tolerance?

As mentioned earlier, in addition to the virtuous and virtuous corporal of the Warring States Prince, another personality that Murong Fu likes to imitate is Han Xin's ability to bear the humiliation of his crotch.Probably due to the indoctrination and education of his parents when he was a child and his own experience in studying history, he deeply recognized that "those who achieve great things must suffer thousands of hardships", not to mention the fact that Liu Bang was surrounded by Bai Deng and Han Xin was ashamed in the history books. There is a precedent, which makes Murong Fu feel that tolerating a momentary humiliation will not damage his personal dignity.

Out of this kind of mentality, he who seems extremely arrogant can sometimes do groveling and unscrupulous things.For example, in order to restore the country, he went to recognize Duan Yanqing, the deposed prince of Dali, as his godfather. Under the watchful eyes of everyone, he "bent his knees, then knelt down, and kowtowed four times."Bao BuTong, the general of his family, knew his master's personality best, so he told him what was on his mind: "You just want to learn from Han Xin and endure the humiliation of your crotch for a while, so as to prepare for your success in the future."

When Murong Fu is flattering others with extremely humiliating and exaggerated behavior, what kind of mentality will he have?Is it shyness and humiliation, feeling that life is better than death?I don't think so.On the contrary, I think that at that moment, a strong self-identity will surge in his heart, and he feels that he is following the example of the sages who achieved imperial and hegemony in ancient times, and is carrying out a great cause.The more others feel that he is humiliated and exaggerated, the stronger his sense of self-identity and satisfaction will be, and the more he will be moved to death.

From this point of view, shouldn't Murong Fu be very good at making friends and very popular with people in the world?The answer is quite negative. He has the biggest problem: Whenever he meets someone with similar status and ability to himself, he will instinctively commit a crime, feel threatened, lose control of the relationship between the two parties, and then develop bad habits. My brain is short-circuited and I can no longer maintain a good attitude. This is almost always the case for his falling out with Xiao Feng, Duan Yu, Xu Zhu and other first-class people in the world.For example, he and Xu Zhu, the two never had any feuds, and Xu Zhu did not offend him in any way, "Seeing that Murong Fu is about to leave, he wholeheartedly persuades him to stay."What is Murong Fu's performance? "With raised eyebrows, he turned around and said in a loud voice: 'Do you think you are invincible, do you want to give some advice?'"

This is a typical off-axis performance.On the surface, he dislikes Xu Zhu because he mistakenly thinks that he has a crush on Wang Yuyan.But before the thirty-six cave masters and seventy-two island masters even raped and molested Wang Yuyan, isn't it much more serious than Xu Zhu's secret love?In order to make friends with these rotten people, Murong Fu was able to write it off and not care about it, so why can't he tolerate a Xu Zhu who is more valuable than cave masters and island masters and is more worthy of friendship? In the final analysis, it was those cave masters and island masters who had low status and low knowledge of martial arts, Murong Fu made friends with them, and felt a pleasure of being above others.But Xu Zhu's martial arts and power are not inferior to him, this makes Murong Fu feel guilty and fearful, he feels that he can't control the relationship between the two of them, so his guilty conscience turns into arrogance, and the idea of ​​trying to be strong and eager to win suddenly That time overwhelmed making friends, and the original intention of "making friends with many people" and "seeking to do great things, only thinking of few people, not afraid of too many people" were thrown out of the sky.

You may wish to read the book, when Xu Zhu extended the olive branch of friendship, Murong Fu's clumsy performance: "Xu Zhu waved his hands again and again, said: 'No... dare not...' Murong Fu said: 'I came here unexpectedly and presumptuously, do you really have to keep us here?' Xu Zhu shook his head and said: 'No... ...No...Yes...Alas!' Murong Fu stood at the door, looking proudly at Xu Zhu... After a long while, Murong Fu flicked his sleeves, said: "Let's go!" He boldly stepped out of the door." The so-called "proud" and "proud" are just armor for Murong Fu to protect his face, behind which there is a lot of guilt and confusion. His weakness in character is due to the deformity of family education.Murong Fu's talent, appearance, martial arts, family background, and family status are all top-notch candidates in the competition.However, his parents set too high demands on him, always demanding him as "the hero who founded the country" and "the king overlord". The huge pressure made him a person who lacked self-confidence. General Wang and Yingcailiang stepped forward to find evidence in the pile of old papers. If he can rely on the actions of those great figures, such as the virtuous corporals of Lord Pingyuan and Lord Xinling, and even Han Xin’s humiliation, he will be happy to emulate and feel that he is also approaching "greatness"; A martial arts fellow with a strong enough personality may endanger his image of "dragon and phoenix among men" and "stars and moon", so he instinctively becomes vigilant, sincerely disgusted with others, and excludes them from his circle. In the end, he killed his family general Bao BuTong, which directly led to the betrayal and collapse of his team. One of the reasons was that Bao BuTong objected to him bowing his knees and fawning over the abolished prince of Dali, but it was also because he lost his relationship with Bao BuTong The dominance of him—a subordinate who usually respected him like a god suddenly began to have different opinions. This "Murong complex personality" is often reflected in personal life.For example: some people only like to hang out with people who are weaker than themselves, and they are indulging in this feeling of "the stars are holding the moon", and they will not get along well when they meet people with strong abilities; Their "subordination" and "helping each other in need" and Murong Fu's "bearable humiliation" and "subservience" to Prince Yanqing of Dali have always been difficult to build a normal, orderly, and good life circle, and it is impossible to make equal good friends. . In our old sayings, people often seem to be faced with a choice-to be a "chicken head" or a "phoenix tail"?In fact, it is not difficult to be a "chicken head", and it is not difficult to be a "phoenix tail". The most test of people is whether they can be ordinary good friends with others.