Chapter 53 Chapter Twelve

After Ge Wenyi, the leader of the Eighth Squad, led the Eighth Squad into action, Shangguanfeng was about to lead the Seventh Squad to follow, when a man suddenly rushed from behind and stopped him.In the dim night air, he heard Li Le, the monitor of No. 9 Squad, say excitedly: "Platoon leader, our class goes first!" After speaking, Li Le led the ninth squad to jump over the ridge line, along the second trench, and followed the eighth squad to rush there.Shangguanfeng had such an impression: Compared with before dark, the ninth squad leader has become another person! Without thinking too much, he led the seventh class to follow, but he was relieved in his heart...

Li Le, the monitor of Class Nine, was born in 1962 in an ordinary intellectual family in a medium-sized city in southern Jiangxi.My father is a talented student of a prestigious university in Shanghai. He insisted on returning to his hometown to work for a graduate of a female middle school who had only met him once at the train station.This female middle school graduate who later became a middle school teacher is Li Le's mother.Like many intellectuals with a romantic temperament, Li Le's father did not escape the "anti-rightist movement" in 1958, and his son died the same year he was born.The mother, who was once perplexed by the sea, did not remarry, and was determined to bring up the three siblings alone.Li Le is the only son, and she is also the sustenance of her ideals in life.This ideal is to train his son to be a talented student in a prestigious university like his husband, and then go out into the big world to do a big business that his father didn't have time to do.From elementary school to middle school, she has strict and demanding requirements for Li Le: at any time, her son's homework must be twice or even three times that of his classmates; any exam, as long as her son does not get the first place, Her depression would kick in and life at home wouldn't be the same.Li Le understood his mother's mind when he was young, and in order to satisfy her, he worked extraordinarily hard in his studies.But as time passed, he found that it was impossible for his mother to be truly satisfied with him, and he would feel unreasonably fearful when he encountered the least important exam.When he graduated from high school, his test phobia had developed to a very serious level. As a result, he fainted in the test room for two consecutive years.In order to help the younger brother and help the extremely disappointed mother recover from depression and pain, the two married sisters invited a psychiatrist from the provincial capital.The doctor advised Li Le to give up the college entrance examination completely, leave his mother, and live a completely independent life, such as becoming a soldier. This is also for the sake of his mother-let her finally give up the idea of ​​​​desperate son Jackie Chan, face up to and gradually accept the reality of life.

Li Le put on the military uniform with deep guilt for his mother.The mother was relatively calm when she sent her son away, but the gray hair on her head turned into white hair in just a few days.This scene was engraved in Li Le's heart like a knife, and it became clearer and clearer as time went on, making his soul more restless.For some reason, he felt that his mother's tranquility was terrible. His mother's life had already died, and what was left was only a shell, which was also aging rapidly and then died.His mother died of despair for him.He knew that he could bring his mother back to life, that is, even if he could be admitted to an ordinary army academy now.However, when he thought of the exam, he became flustered again. Although Li Le was a person who was repeatedly frustrated in the exam room, he was also an extremely sensitive and face-saving person.He was afraid that he would faint in the examination room again and be ridiculed in the army again, so he did not dare to apply for the military academy for three consecutive years.At the end of the third year, he finally made up his mind: next year will be the last year of his military service, and he will have to take a life-and-death test.He also bought a large number of review books for the college entrance examination, made a detailed plan, and made a lot of noise, so that he could not find a way to retreat.

As soon as his plan began, the troops received combat orders.He found himself relieved, not surprised.In the final analysis, he still has lingering fears about the exam room, because of his mother, he has to take the college entrance exam in the army next year, and now something happened that he can't control, of course he is willing to free himself from it.He also heard the news that has been repeatedly confirmed by people: after the war, the army will send a group of combat cadres to the military academy for further study, without taking exams!The news made him happy at first, and then worried.The joy is that he found a way to go to university without taking exams. The worry is that the anti-aircraft machine gun company he is in may not be able to fight (the possibility of enemy aircraft participating in the battle is extremely small). I have nothing to do with myself.After two nights of insomnia, he made a decision: transferred to the infantry company!Never give up on such a road to university!The head of the company was puzzled when he received the application for transfer from him: At this time, others were scrambling to transfer from the infantry company to a relatively safer unit, but he did the opposite!Bewildered, Li Le was rewarded for voluntarily supporting the infantry company. For a while, he became a model for the whole regiment. His application was approved, and he went to the Ninth Company smoothly.

Before the war, Li Le's heart had been soaked in quiet joy and excitement.First of all, with this transfer, he will never enter the examination room that made him change his face in this life. After the Ninth Company, he will become the squad leader, and it will be no problem to be selected and sent to the military academy after the war; secondly. However, the Ninth Company is the regiment's reserve team, and the chances of going to battle are slim.What he thought about most was his mother: after the war, once his mother heard that he had participated in the war and was sent to the military academy, and realized that her son was not as useless as she thought, would she burst into tears and burst into tears? !

His mood became tense after the whole battalion was assigned to Regiment A to participate in the battle of Qipanling.Li Le thought of death, but he didn't want to think about it until the worst happened, so after the whole battalion arrived at Heifengjian last night, he was still able to walk to Shangguan Feng with Ge Wenyi, the eighth squad leader, Sit peacefully for a while and smoke a cigarette.However, he was not as upright as Ge Wenyi after all. The eighth squad leader had expected him to comfort the platoon leader, but he didn't say anything.It wasn't until this morning when the whole battalion raided the 632 highland area that he finally realized that he was facing one thing every moment: death!

He had never seriously thought about his own death before, but now he could not help but feel it concretely in every second of his life; before he never thought that death would destroy his college dream while swallowing his life, thus Killing the possibility of his mother coming back to life, he also thought of it now.These scenes made him shudder, so when the whole platoon was involved in the sniper battle on the northwest side of 634 Heights, Li Le had already fallen into the following mental state: in his eyes and heart, there was nothing but the threat of the enemy, except for a highly timid He had no one else; he was not so much fighting to drive back the enemy on the other side of the gully as he was fighting for his life, trying to hide his head more securely under the rock in front of him.

The heavy machine gun on the mountain leg in the south of the 631 highland suddenly launched a fire attack on the enemy on the mountain leg of Yingzui Peak, and he woke up from the overwhelming fear in his heart. He raised his head and immediately found two people lying prostrate beside him. A warrior - twin brothers Zhao Guangming and Zhao Guangming - was looking at him with strange eyes!His face couldn't bear such a gaze, and immediately turned hot red! There are some things in everyone's spiritual character that seem to be contradictory at first glance, but they are consistent in a deeper life background.Li Le also fainted in the examination room, and hid his head during the battle, but after the battle, he couldn't bear the gaze of others—especially the two recruits beside him!In fact, his exam phobia has a lot to do with this face-saving and sensitive personality.Fear of not doing well in the exam, and fear of disappointing his mother made him so fearful of the exam that he fainted. Now, it was this kind of disposition that made him suspect that his cowardly behavior was seen by the whole platoon, especially the platoon leader not far from him. He thought that the whole platoon, especially the platoon leader, had looked down on him!

For such a young man, his heart is deeply inferior, and now he has a sense of shame caused by self-doubt.So when the whole platoon made the last attack on the high ground, Shangguanfeng saw an expression on his face as if he was angry for something.Then Li Le's self-doubt was intensified by two events that happened before dark: one was that the platoon leader shouted to order Class Nine to follow up while the whole platoon was moving upwards. Guangming Zhao Guangliang was dissatisfied, and he also warned himself in a subtle way; the other thing was that during the battle preparation meeting, after hearing Ge Wenyi's suggestion, the platoon leader suddenly turned his face, looked at him with obvious dissatisfaction, and asked him to Expressing opinions - Li Le hurriedly avoided Shangguanfeng's sight, and thought of his performance in the blocking battle at the foot of the mountain: the whole platoon was about to launch the last attack after dark, and the platoon leader tortured him with suspicious and contemptuous eyes. Can I do it next time? !

No one knew that among the officers and soldiers of the whole company, Li Le secretly admired only one person, and that was Shangguan Feng, who was five years younger than him.He developed this feeling for Shangguan Feng based on his own unique life experience: Li Le was a defeated general in the college entrance examination battlefield, but Shangguan Feng entered the university at the age of twelve.In his imagination, it was almost unbelievable.Compared with it, he couldn't help but feel inferior.Many people in the company regard Shangguan Feng as a young boy, but he knows that the platoon leader is actually better and more promising than anyone else in the company.And now this man whom he admired, who had no fear in the face of death, cast a contemptuous glance at his shameful cowardice!

No, he could bear the contempt of anyone in the whole company, but he couldn't bear the contempt of this person who was younger than him and much better than himself!Shangguanfeng's life is more valuable than his, why is he more afraid of death than the former! No, if everyone is destined to die today, he will also die in front of the platoon leader!He couldn't let Shangguan Feng die before himself, he wanted to take Class 9 to the front of the platoon leader and Class 7, so that the platoon leader could see that he was not a coward! Li Le ran in the second trench with his waist down, turning his head to look at Zhao Guangming and Zhao Guangliang behind him from time to time.He decided to move the Erzhao brothers behind him just before the start of the attack.The platoon leader had been dissatisfied with the two Zhao brothers when he moved up to the high ground. Now he wants to control them personally, and let these two people see for themselves whether he is still the one who dives into the pebbles when he hears the gunshot! He still quickly forgot about Zhao Guangming and Zhao Guangliang.Just approaching the enemy's fan-shaped firepower coverage area, he heard the bullets whizzing past his head and ears like a rainstorm, and squeaked into the soil on both sides of the trench, his heart was once again overwhelmed by that simple, impossible The fear of name is full! In the depths of Li Le's life, there is a tragic thing that his relatives and comrades-in-arms have not discovered.When he was still a teenager, his self-confidence, his growing independent personality, and his firmness, composure and courage in facing difficulties as a person were all destroyed by his mother's high expectations that could never be met , Since then, what he is used to and expects in life is only failure instead of success.The other side of his personality—saving face and sensitivity—under certain circumstances will make him suddenly excited and make a resolution for a goal that he actually knows he cannot achieve, but when he encounters a severe test, his personality And psychological doubts will naturally regain the upper hand, drowning his determination and reason together.At times like this—it was in the examination room in the past, but today it is on the battlefield—he has nothing else in his heart except for the unreasonable and huge fear! His pace slowed, but did not stop, propelled forward by the force of inertia which had acted on him since the beginning of combat action; and he reached the entrance of the upward communication trench at the western end of the second trench with the same inertia. With the strength of his strength, he led Class Ninth into abducting him.He just ran a few steps in the traffic trench, turned a corner, and looked up subconsciously. Suddenly, he saw a large burst of flames from the enemy's light machine guns at the top of the almost straight-up traffic trench.Before he could react, a few bullets hit the trench wall on his right.The fear in Li Le's heart suddenly swelled infinitely, leaning his body against the wall on the left side, and instinctively made a shooting action! Then he heard gunshots!The gunshot was fired by Zhao Guangliang behind him!Seeing the squad leader firing a gun in front, Zhao Guangliang, who was always in a state of high tension, thought that the squad leader was going to shoot at the enemy, so he quickly fired a gun on the trench wall, and hastily fired a string of bullets! Then, the others who followed them thought that the battle had already started, and they also leaned on the wall of the trench and fired "crackling" shots at the enemy in the third trench! It was this burst of gunfire that prematurely revealed the intention of attack, causing the enemy to pour all their firepower on them.In the next ten minutes or so, Li Le, who had completely lost his mind, buried his head under the edge of the trench, trembling all over. A light machine gun fought tenaciously with the enemy.The shooting sound of this light machine gun only played the following role: it made the last self-made string in Li Le's life, which was still barely maintained, more and more tense, and finally it was completely broken because of its sudden disappearance! So, one minute after Qin Erbao's light machine gun firing stopped, people suddenly heard a loud "Wow—" from the traffic trench where Li Le was hiding!Following this inhuman long cry, Li Le jumped up, climbed up the edge of the trench, swayed his body, stood firm, and yelled "Wah-wah" again, frantically rushing towards the enemy's position above the high ground ! This is how the battlefield allows people to do things that neither they nor others could have imagined: Li Le is terrified of facing death, but when the weight of the fear itself overwhelms his will to live, he will pounce on him to get rid of the fear. die!He himself doesn't know that he is rushing towards death, he just wants to rush towards the weight that makes his life unbearable in the frenzy, and he wants to get the final relief in this rush! Following his yell, the other two soldiers of Squad 9 thought that the squad leader had given the order to charge and took the lead in charging, and they also jumped out of the traffic trench, screaming "Wow", and the submachine gun fired a "Da Da Da" A string of bullets, pounce on the enemy's position! The enemy who had just knocked out Qin Erbao's light machine gun was obviously panicked by the new attack, and there was a roar of ghosts and wolves in the trench again, and all the bullets immediately flew towards Li Le and the two soldiers behind him come over.The hillside was dimmed by the night and clusters of fires. They didn't know how strong our army was charging upwards. The dense rain of bullets knocked down the two soldiers behind Li Le first!The enemy's light machine gunner at the west end of the third trench didn't see Li Le who was striding forward at first. When the flames in front of the position suddenly reflected the latter from the darkness, he seemed to be frightened and forgot to shoot. .What he saw was a completely insane man, his ragged military uniform was on fire in three places, his eyes were wide open, his face was smeared with a layer of dirty oil paint, and he was holding a submachine gun but did not shoot, just " "Wow!" screamed, stumbling towards himself!The enemy shooter couldn't contain the sudden terror in his heart, he also yelled "Wow", straightened up and wanted to run, and seemed to suddenly understand: running can't run away!He didn't stop howling, leaned down, and almost slammed the light machine gun at the abdomen of Li Le who was running in front of his eyes!Li Le staggered and fell to the front of the enemy's position; then he rolled down two or three meters and was blocked by some half-burned bushes.He passed out, and was immediately awakened by the sharp pain in the wound and the cry of the charge coming from the slope! This new cry came from Shangguanfeng and the seventh squad led by him.After Squad Nine exposed the target prematurely, Shangguanfeng was also suppressed at the bottom of the trench by the enemy's bullet rain!Then he witnessed the heroic attack of Class Eight and their destruction!In the future, Qin Erbao's light machine gun brought him a glimmer of hope, but it was also quickly destroyed by the enemy!The ninth squad leader Li Le had just led two soldiers to jump out of the traffic trench frantically and launched an attack on the enemy. Shangguan Feng's eyes immediately filled with tears of grief and indignation!He understood that this might be the last chance for the whole platoon to attack the enemy's position, so without any further hesitation, he jumped up from the bottom of the trench and shouted behind him: "Come on!" go!Since he was running in a traffic trench, the enemy's firepower only focused on Li Le and the others on the hillside, and they were not hit at first.But after he ran a few steps, he tripped over two black lumps at the bottom of the trench! "Who!" he yelled. Two disfigured faces rose from the bottom of the ditch, illuminated by the firelight on the hillside.It's Zhao Guangming and Zhao Guangliang!A wave of anger rushed straight to Shangguan Feng's forehead, he got up and kicked the two brothers who didn't know who. "Why are you hiding here?!" he yelled, "Come on—" The Zhao brothers first burst into tears with a "wow", then grabbed their guns and rushed forward staggeringly!But due to the delay just now, Li Le's attack on the hillside has failed, and the enemy's light machine guns directly above the traffic trench turned their guns to attack them again!Zhao Guangming and Zhao Guangliang lay down in a hurry, and Shangguanfeng was also suppressed under the edge of the trench by the fierce firepower from above.A sad idea emerged from his heart: the last attack failed!everything is over! ... Li Le, the monitor of Class Nine, died before dawn.Realizing that the attack launched by the platoon leader and the seventh squad was stopped again, he passed out again.It was already late at night when I woke up again, and the highlands were very quiet.Li Le vaguely thought that he was not dead, and also thought that if he could hold back the burning thirst in his mouth and not drink the spring water flowing from the cracks in the rocks, he might even have the hope of living.But when he thought about it, he also knew that he had no strength to resist the temptation of the spring water. He had never overcome any real test in his short life, and this time was no exception.He moved his chapped lips to a line of spring water beside him, and drank more raw water than he thought, which caused a second hemorrhage from the abdominal wound, passed out again, and never woke up again.